Communication Needed.

Steve looked up as Clay sat across from him at the small coffee shop next to the park.  "We have a slight problem and I know if I go to Jensen or Cougar there's going to be too much pressure."

"What sort of problem?  Not that I'm all that subtle," Clay quipped.

Steve laid out the deed to the houses Xander owned.  "Notice the different one?"

Clay looked and groaned.  "They're on the papers for the main house," he said flatly.  Steve nodded.  "Have you talked to them?"

"Danny still thinks that it's a phase," he said dryly.  "He's sure Xander's off finding himself and he'll come back after the trip."

"If he did, I'd have Jolene sit him down and explain what a good relationship is."  Clay grimaced and pushed them back to Steve.  "You're right, Jensen would tie them up while they were asleep and then talk to them."

"Which, by law, we can't do," Steve said with a small smirk.  "If it was easier I'd have let Cougar and maybe Pooch."

"Pooch would lecture about a good relationship."

"Don agreed that he kept ignoring Xander.  That he wasn't the sort of boyfriend that Xander needed.  He hopes he gets another chance when he's all straightened out.  He thinks it might be next life though."

"It might be," Clay agreed.  "What's the offer?"

"By law we have to give them at least what the value of their share is.  The only reason they're on there was because of the sacrificial cult."

"When was that?" Clay asked.

"Within a year of when they moved down here.  It happened in the house by the station that Xander just sold."

"Are they debating their names being off it?"

"They think it's safer."

"I think Xander's got decent plans for what should happen in case of emergency."

"He does.  I've got a copy of his will, and there's one on file already.  Horatio has a copy, Jensen has a copy.  Jolene might have a copy.  We even sent one to Larabee in case it was needed out there."  Clay smirked.  "All of the holders *know* though so it's safer."  Clay nodded.  "How does the pool look?"

"Haven't seen it or the grotto Sam had put in."

"He has one in Denver too.  It's his safe destressing place."

"I get the need.  Jensen could use one too."  They shared a look.  "I'll talk to them later."  Steve smiled and paid for their lunch.  They went over Xander's remaining schedule.  The new escort that was going to meet Xander in Greece was a bit flaky by Clay's thinking but he was a former agent and could baby Xander if he wanted it and was nearly a nympho from the recommendations they had gotten.  That would help them a lot.


Clay walked up to Horatio later that afternoon.  "Is Danny around?" he asked quietly.

Horatio looked at him then back at the officers on break.  "In the lab.  Why?"

"Steve wants me to talk to them about their names being on the deed to the main house."  Horatio winced.  "Exactly."

"That is going to be messy.  Danny isn't...really understanding his needs."

"I heard."

"I'll send him down."

"Thanks."  They parted and Clay went to the picnic table area.  He didn't want to seem too menacing.  Just firm.  Danny spotted him and walked over, sitting across from him.  "I was asked to talk to you."

"One of the poker buddies?" Danny quipped with a grin.


Danny lost his smile.  "What happened to Xander?"

"Nothing yet.  Though he did wear himself out when it was raining by popping back to Japan to help some more."

"Sounds like him."

"The problem Steve wanted me to talk to you about is the deed to the main house."

Danny stared at him.  "What about it?"

"Your name is on it and you're not together anymore."


Clay held up a hand.  "If he thought about you getting back together, I'd have Jolene talk to the boy."  Danny glared.  "You treated the boy like shit.  I can be blunt if I need to," he offered at the continued glare.  "Do you know how often Jensen heard that he was miserable with you two?"  Danny shook his head.  "Even Jolene told him to try to break you guys up and she once smacked Jensen for getting between her and Pooch while they fought."

"I tried."

"You saw more of the dog than him," Clay said.  "Even you realized it because you changed and then backslid.  Then you got nagged and did it again."  He stared him down.  "We don't think it's a good idea.  It's a big block to Xander finding someone worthwhile.  We'd like Xander to have someone great that dotes on him like he needs."

"He could control it...."

Clay smacked him on the side of the head.  "No, he can't.  He'd need help with that and you two treated him like a pet.  You played when you had energy and then just gave him ear pets and expected him to bring you a toy when you felt lazy.  Even I treat my women better, Messer."  He stared at him.  "If you don't let him go, he'll never come back.  You both need to finish growing up.  It's sad that Dean and Sam are more mature than you sometimes."  Danny got up and stomped off.  "Take the offer, Messer.  It'll make you both happier."  One of the officers looked at him.  "They're on the house's deed."  The officer winced.  "Thankfully there wasn't a formal divorce needed."  He got up and strolled off.  He'd catch Don later since he was on a call.


Wade grabbed Xander, walking him off.  "They've sent home all the foreign aid workers outside those who're docs and handing out food," he said quietly.  Xander nodded.  "So go change and get pretty.  You have an extra cooking lesson in about ten minutes."  Xander grinned and walked off after batting him on the arm.  Wade glanced around, catching someone watching them.  He raised an eyebrow.  They stared back.  He walked over there.  "Problems?"

"I know of your past," she said.

He smirked.  "I have a saner boss now.  He only destroys evil things."

She cleared her throat.  "There are many who would like to know more about this one in case we run into him on the job."

Wade shook his head.  "He's not in that field.  He collects weapons but doesn't sell them."  He smirked.  "He's still beating the people who hadn't heard the Watchers Council ended the contract on his life."

She frowned.  "I know of that name but not what they do?" she asked.

"They're paranormal cranks," Xander said as he walked up behind Wade.  He smiled at her.  "Interpol has a nice file on me thanks to that contract."  Wade shook his head.  "Is it that wrong?"

"It's not bad.  Not fully good but good enough for beginners."  He walked Xander off to hand him to the resort's chef.  "He's a really good cook already."  The chef smiled and nodded, taking Xander off to teach him how to make some of the native dishes.  Wade strolled off.  That agent was making a report.  She looked displeased.  He grinned.  "They telling you bad things?" he joked.

"He is one of *them*?" she demanded.

"Which 'them' are we talking about?"

"He's ...."  She used a native derogatory term for gay men.

"Yes, he is.  He's also very giving to charities, spoils his pets and his friends' kids rotten, and is an excellent cook.  He had women but they were bitches.  Just like you."  He stared her down.  "Tell your boss I said hi and he probably still owes me money."  She spat something in Russian and he shrugged.  "My girlfriend would disagree with you on that and she's better in bed than you are."  He smirked at her evil glare.  "Anything else?"  He took the phone and walked off chatting.  The agent in charge was having a fit but he said it was reasonable when he kept going in the file. 

Apparently they didn't list the GHS-ness in there but he realized what it meant and asked.  Wade made an agreeing sound.  He decided they were going to leave the tour group alone.  Wade tossed the woman her phone back and strolled off to get a beer.  He had missed really good beer.  Even if the bar did think it was so hip because it served American ones he wanted something better.

She heard her boss's orders and huffed but accepted it.  He'd have her killed if she didn't.  She stomped off to find someone to change assignments with.  She didn't want to deal with this man.  Or his assistant.


Xander looked up from his quiet reading time in the resort's gardens - mostly hiding from Paul's bad back again - and sighed in displeasure at the man who was staring at him.  "I'm very handsome but why are you staring?"

"You went into a bar in Moscow."

"An acquaintance recommended it to me.  My assistant nearly spanked me for being there.  So?"

"Why does a man like you need an assistant?"

"Because the Miami, Florida Police Department and NCIS said so."  He smiled.

"You have officers you pay in them?"

"I'm not that sort of man.  Wade mostly handles the people who owe me money and those that want to own me."

"Why would anyone want to own you?"

"Go ask Wade."  He went back to his reading.  "I consider you continuing to stare at me rude," he said after a minute of it.  He called out and one of the demon guards showed up to sneer at the man, making him back away slowly.  "This is one of my personal bodyguards."  Xander looked at the guard, who was staring at him.  "He's in my seat, dude."

"I knew he was a placeholder but I was not aware it was yours, Knight."  Xander grinned.  "That makes much sense."  He glared at the puny human again.  "Leave the Knight alone.  Before someone orders his very crazy assistant to have fun with you."

Xander laughed and handed the guard the box that appeared beside him.  "Present?"

He looked.  "A tasteless one."  He showed him, getting an eye roll in response.  "I will give it back to the tacky being."  He glared at the human, making him step back farther.  "We will be watching."  He disappeared.

"And that's why I need Wade.  Because people send me things I don't want."  He smirked and went back to his book.  "Have a wonderful day even if you do have to keep staring at me."

"I do not believe a man such as Wade has a girlfriend."

"He's dating one of my ex's actually.  She's a lot more militant and torturing than I am.  They're a good match to each other and I'm happy that both sides found happiness.  Even if Wade is spoiling my baby dragon right now."

One of the guard team heard Xander sounding pissed off and looked outside.  Who he saw made him swear and call Wade and Paul as he walked out.  He stepped between them, staring at the local agent.  "Xander is not what you think.  He's rehabilitated Wade into a useful commando again.  Wade is here to make sure no one steals Xander."

"Or sends me tacky things," Xander said, turning and throwing a knife at someone sneaking toward him with a box.  "I said I'm not dating," he growled.  The demon bowed and dropped the box before running off crying.  "Okay, and now I feel rotten.  He was probably a minion and I shouldn't have been so mean."  Xander sighed.  "Wade, can you please make the poor minion quit crying?  It probably wasn't his fault and he left the box anyway."

"Can I break his boss?"

"If you're that bored," Xander quipped with a grin, holding up the box.  "It sounds like another snake."

"Yipee," Wade said sarcastically, taking the box to glance inside.  "Two white snakes actually."  He made sure it was sealed and looked at the staring agent.  "Yes, I handle people like that for him.  That way he doesn't have to get so messy."

"I hate getting kidnaper blood out of my hair," Xander quipped.  "It means I have to condition it more." 

Wade snorted, walking off smiling and shaking his head.  "Only if it's demon blood, kid.  The rest washes out easier."

"If you're sure."  Xander shrugged and went back to reading.  Paul stopped him when he reached for his snack, which had been changed out.  Xander looked then smiled at him.  "Thank you."

"Didn't think you wanted to try those."  He handed them to the guard that had come with him.  "Is there some sort of problem?" he asked with a smile.

"Who're you?"

"London Retrieval Team on special assignment."  He smirked.  "I'm with the Society."  The agent gave him a horrified look and stepped back.  Paul smiled and petted Xander, making him tip his head and purr.  "You need your scalp conditioned again."

"I have spa time at our next stop."

"Good."  Paul smirked.  "Wade is a very good assistant for Xander.  He makes things much easier."

Xander nodded.  "He steals me back all the time so Paul doesn't have to."

"I'm just glad he got the last one since that wasn't the usual sort," Paul said.

Xander looked at him.  "Was I aware of that?"

"Probably not.  Why?  Any idea why he wanted you?"

"Yes.  Ask Wade."

"Crap, one of those reasons?"  He went to find Wade, but had to settle for asking him later.  He did send a note to Miami to warn them.

Xander grinned.  "I'm being a good boy.  I'm only here to see your pretty sights and then we're moving on in two whole days.  Must you stare that long?"

"My superiors think that there is an issue."

"I'm not an issue, I'm a human," Xander corrected.  "And your boss isn't one I've ever talked to as far as I know."  He stared at him.  "For right now, if you want to watch over me, don't stare!"  The agent looked away.  Xander looked at the guard team.  "I'm being a good boy hiding from Paul's thrown back."

"I noticed he was walking like a pregnant woman," the other team member said.

"Apparently I got a bit too cowboy," Xander said with a grin.

"I need someone that's about half of your skills," their female guard member teased as she joined them.  "Half as cuddly, all the sweetness, and half the energy in bed."  She patted him on the head.  "Where's Wade?"

"Going to talk to the being that sent the minion with the present."

"Ah, he's going to be happy later then."  She sat beside him.  "What are you reading?"

"Someone at the desk suggested I should read this book when I asked for a recommendation.  It's not hard, since I only know about the first year of classes worth of Russian.  It's mostly interesting with a historical outlook.  I'm not sure if it's true history though."

"We'll see once you're finished, then you can tell me more."  He beamed and nodded, getting back to the book.  She knew that Xander seriously needed someone to engage him and make him want to do things.  Assigning him an oral book report apparently fit that for today.

The agent walked off to call his boss.  Something was very wrong here and he was sure it wasn't him.


The group paused on their way to dinner.  It was just up the street so they were walking.  Of course, they ran into a problem.  So of course it had to be a big one since the group hadn't had too many so far.  This time it was a guy holding a family with children hostage and yelling at police officers.  The guard team was moving ahead to talk to the cops.  Wade was translating.

Xander stared.  "Wade, tell me I'm not going to get yelled at?"

"You will, Xander.  A lot."

"They have kids."

Wade huffed.  "Tiny bit, no making them do more than beg."

"Sure."  Xander loosened his shirt and tie, strolling out there.  "Boys, I specialize in hostile situations," he said dryly in Russian, walking around an officer who was trying to stop him.  He let the hormones out gradually, letting them grow as he walked toward him.  "Are you really that mean?" he asked.  The man was staring at him.  Xander stared back.  "Really?  They're children.  They deserve a life.  They deserve the right to maybe even solve a lot of social problems for everyone."  The man shouted at him in Russian about not being a queer. 

"Honey, I'm not a queer, I'm a queen."  He let the hormones out farther and the guy started to pant.  So did the older son.  Xander looked at him and pointed.  "Go over there.  You're too young."  He ran to his father.  Xander stared at the man again, looking up from under his lashes.  The guy was visibly sweating and panting now.  The guy got pissed off that Xander was making him want him. 

He rushed Xander and Xander knocked him down, out, and took the gun.  He walked over him, handing an officer the gun after checking the safety.  "He's very sorry he's so pathetic.  Maybe some time in prison with a new husband will cure that for him."  He walked around Wade.  "Let me change.  I'll meet you there.  Stay, Wade.  Just in case.  We're the only two that can speak Russian."

"I'll go," one of the guard team offered.  Xander grinned and nodded.

Wade escorted the rest.  "I'm damn glad he didn't let all of it out."

"Only upper ones can do that," one of the other members was telling one of the guards.

"Xander was teaching a few level fives at the last convention," Wade said.

"I'm sorry my back hasn't held out," Paul said quietly.

Wade patted him on the shoulder with a scary grin.  "I've seen Xander wear out his last two boyfriends and Jensen.  The only known person that has ever worn Xander out completely by himself was Jensen and I'm told they had to get into a bit of bondage."

Paul laughed.  "Jensen's very energetic."

"They spar together all the time too."  Paul shivered and shook his head quickly.  "Yeah.  Them and the Winchester boys."

"I'm so sorry for Clay," he muttered.  "I nearly want to go to church and pray for Clay's mind."

Wade smirked.  "He and Jensen are trouble buddies anyway.  That's one reason why Clay's already insane."

One of the other guards laughed.  "I think that was from Jensen before he met Xander."

"How did Xander meet someone like Clay?  Was it through a contact?" Paul asked.  "Clay told me that Xander suggested them for the local team."

"The hunting bobsy twins got taken to where they were working by the same guy they were going after.  Clay's team rescued them.  Dean and Sam got them back to Miami, which is when they realized that Max wanted Xander a whole lot.  Max tried to work things around so he got him but Xander had him ripped apart by hellhounds.  And then Roque and I got brought back to life.  Clay actually accused us of having Stockholm Syndrome about the kid since he fed us, let Clay kick our asses, and let us stalk him around for a bit.  Pooch still thinks I have Stockholm Syndrome but Xander's a really nice boss.  He even lets me keep Anya."

"Max...shared?" he asked.

"No.  Max shot.  Then again, I shot a few of his for being bimbos."  He shrugged. "Xander's on a whole other level of strange and scary when he wants to be.  I've never been so terrified in my life as I was in St. Louis when he broke free of everyone to go after the zombies with a sword."

Paul looked back.  "I saw that on tv.  That was Xander?"

"And Ryan Wolfe, yeah.  I was newly his minion then.  I got told he was a berserker under the right circumstances.  I didn't understand what that meant until then.  Then later that night, his patron saints showed up to regrow the hair."

Strife strolled past and kissed him.  "We like the hair, Wade."  He winked and smirked evilly.  "That agent thought Xander was someone else."  He cackled.  "Now, he's real worried."  He disappeared.

Everyone stared at Wade.  "Strife.  He's one that helped train Xander on an off-realm trip thanks to Horatio being a redhead."  One of the society people snickered, shaking her head.  "Yeah, I heard.  Every time someone gives him an animal they all end with 'at least it's not an elephant' so I had to ask."

"Tumie, the guy they rescued, put up some stories about his time on the Euro Society site.  The way he described it was hilarious at times."  She looked at the others.  "They want redheads they're so rare there."

"Horatio was with them," Wade said, opening the restaurant door.  "That's where Xander got those tattoos from."  He smiled at the staring greeter.  "We have reservations.  Two more of us are coming, one had to change."  She nodded and took them into the back room.  It was a homey pub-like place and it had a lot of scrubbed wood walls.  A long, wooden table with wood chairs that didn't quite match the color of the walls.  Lace tablecloths and napkin holders.  It looked like a pub run by a knitting, cat petting, flower loving grandmother.  They were told it had good food.  Xander and the other guard joined them a few minutes later.  "Better?" Wade asked.

"Baby wipes to make sure I'm not sweating."

"Good idea," Paul said with a smile.  "Are you all right?"

"I haven't heard as many gay remarks as I have on this part of the trip since I was in New York.  But I'm okay with that because I know it's a provincial thing.  Some day, scum like that guy holding the family hostage will join us in this century and find real brains."

"He was probably high," another member said.

"I know.  I've seen many in Miami."  He grinned.  "I play poker with some.  Then they realize that gay men are good at many things.  Including helping them shop for presents for their girlfriends."

Wade snickered.  "One called him up at ten one night.  He had forgotten his anniversary.  His pregnant girlfriend had a knife.  She was chasing him around the house.  He swore up and down to her that he had left it at Xander's because Xander had helped him shop for it, which she appreciated.  Xander told him it was fine for him to come get it and for her to put down the knife and make a sandwich; it was a good thirty minute drive from their place.  She gave him an hour and a half.  He got there and he's still paying Xander back."

"I gave him something I had bought for Calleigh's birthday.  She works with Horatio in the lab."  He grinned.  "The baby's middle name is named after me."

"I'm just glad the ambulance finally got there so you didn't have to deliver it," Wade shot back.

"Me too."  The group snickered and nodded at that.  The waiter came in and they ordered, enjoying this homey place.  Even if the staff didn't like that some of them were gay they didn't say anything.  That was nice and unusual of the locals.  Xander would have to remember that for later trips.


Clay finally cornered Don at a bar he had called him to meet at.  Don sighed visibly and headed back to the table against the back wall.  Clay stared at him.  "Did Danny complain?"

"A lot."  He sat down.  "It's safer if the house can't be taken away."

Clay shook his head.  "Half of everyone has a copy of Xander's will.  Including Larabee."  He sipped his beer.  "What if he finds someone else, Don?"

"Then we'd have to back off," he admitted.  "I was thinking maybe Steve's name should go on it instead of ours.  That way there's still the safety of ownership thing.  Because if he has to die, then the judge would order the house auctioned off to be distributed with the will."

"I'll ask him about that option but Steve didn't think it'd be a problem.  He can check with someone who does inheritance work more often."  He stared at him.  "You guys tried but it's not going to happen for a long time.  Not until you want to be *with* him, warts, hormones, and all that together," he said more quietly.

"I know.  Work keeps getting in the way of everything.  Even Speed's complained about that."

"Well, from the rumors going around, the oversight people might be curing that."  Don glared at him.  "The new head over the lab accreditation people hates Horatio being married to a guy.  Hates all the gay people in the department.  Jensen called him a right-wing nut worse than the Taliban."  He took another drink while Don shuddered.  "Exactly."

"I'll make sure Horatio knows," Don said.  He glanced around then at him.  "How is he doing?  We've gotten a few e-cards but nothing like a letter."

"They're doing okay.  They're finally out of Russia.  We all worried when they got there and had agents coming to bug Wade and stalk Xander.  Thankfully some of Wade's contacts realized about the society and told the others to leave him alone.  Jensen said that a lot of gay bashing language was used in Russia too.  Xander had to help stop a hostage taker."  Don rolled his eyes.  "The guy was high and had kids hostage."

"Sounds like Xander, yeah."  He tapped the table a few times.  "I heard rumors that someone gave Xander something massive but Dean said it's not in the present warehouse?" he asked quietly.

Clay rolled his eyes.  "They decided Xander needed a better GHS style house."  Don growled.  "Including plans to put new trees in this spring.  Fence, large pool with a slide, spa room, all that.  Jensen talked to them and they don't want Xander for themselves but he does want permission to send people he likes at the kid to see if they'd be good together."  Don grimaced and shook his head.  "He knows some nicer, fairly well off people who could be a good boyfriend to Xander but I doubt Xander would take him up on it.  That's what Jensen told him and the guy pouted but said he'd talk to Xander when he got back.  Though he did mention two of his friends were over that way right now if Xander wanted introduced."

"I don't think Xander would put up with some rich heir boy."

"No, probably not," Clay agreed.  "Though it's fun watching Wade want to stomp them and not being able to."

Don smirked.  "Does Wade know you want that sort of entertainment?"

"Probably.  He sent Jensen tape from Singapore since the guy was one that wanted Jensen's tech-loving fingers."  He finished his beer.  "Steve said by law they have to buy your name off the deed."

"If Steve or someone puts his name on it to protect Xander then I'll agree," Don said.  "I know things weren't right between us and might not be right between us for a long time."  Clay smirked and nodded.  "Is that hermaphrodite looking guy staying with Xander the whole trip?"

"They're changing in a few days. Though Paul is a decent guy.  It shocks the hell out of me since he was always a dirtbag on the job."

"We don't think he'd want to keep Xander?" Don asked, not looking at him.

"No.  Xander told Jensen he threw Paul's back out a few times."  He rolled his eyes.  "Which made Wade less than pleased but it kept things a bit too interesting.  The next one is nearly nympho."

"That could help."  Don looked at him.  "Want me to talk to Danny?"

"Please.  Steve said I could threaten him if I wanted to."  He smirked.

"I'll keep that in mind."  He got up and left, going back to the apartment to think about things.  He found Danny making dinner.  "Maybe we should let Steve protect Xander for a bit."

Danny stared at him.  "Steve's not going to be able to scare off the people who want 'im like we are, Don."

"I'm not so sure of that."  He sat down at the breakfast bar, staring at his friend.  "We're clearly not scaring off anyone since Clay said someone wants to give Xander an estate and introduce him to some nice, rich boys."

"Just what he needs," Danny said sarcastically.  "First the girly looking guy then that one."

"Paul, the one with him, is going to the London retrieval team.  I asked a few of the poker buddies who he was."

Danny stared at him.  "What?"

"He's a retrieval team member.  He's going to London once he hands Xander over to the new guy in Turkey."

Danny considered that.  "So he's an agent?"

"SEAL.  Two years, then injured and discharged.  Then something that got balled into Homeland when it was formed."

Danny grimaced.  "You think they're going to date or somethin'?"

"No.  Clay said Xander threw out his back a few times.  They're apparently good enough friends to travel together but they won't be more than that."

Danny nodded.  "That's good.  That he has legit friends," he added at Don's look.  "I still don't like him being unprotected that way.  The house could be sold on him if something happens."

"Steve can put his name on there."

Danny nodded.  "Steve's adjunct family, not real family."

"But he's safe, he's neutral, he handles the taxes anyway.  If something happens, he's Xander main go-to guy."  Danny nodded once at that.  "It'd still be safe but if Xander wanted to try to date other guys that would help him let go of us and figure out what he really wants and needs."

"He needs to do more for himself."

"How can he when he's always so backed up?" Don shot back, staring him down.  "Not like he can wank off every hour to keep 'em down.  That doesn't work well enough."

Danny muttered something.  "Whatever.  Are you going to let Steve amend it?"

"As long as he or someone else protective who's not Wade goes on it."  Danny glanced at him.  "I like how good Wade's doing but even he's gotten frustrated a few times with him.  And let's face it, no one's going to believe that he and Xander are together."

"Good point."  He huffed and went back to cooking.  "I'll think about it."  He stirred the pot he was working in.  "Maybe if it was Jensen or Ryan."

"He's worn Ryan out too much," Don said quietly.  "Jensen's busy and the retrieval team is only going to get more and more busy."

"Point," Danny said, considering that.  "Still, Jensen's safer.  Not a whole lot can take out Jensen and Steve's not great with a sword yet."

"Steve fights like Adam does.  He don't play fair," Don said, smiling slightly.  "Then again, you and I?  Out of practice."

"Yeah, we are.  Wolfe too."

"Ryan does katas every night."  Danny glared at him.  He grinned back.  "Eric said it annoyed him to no end."

"Would me too."  He huffed again and went back to cooking.  "Are they in Turkey yet?"

"Yeah, just landed today."

"Good."  He took the pot off the heat and dished up some of the soup he had been heating.  "Here."

"Thanks.  You make a good wife," Don teased.

Danny popped him on the side of the head.  "I'm not the wife, Flack.  I have too much dick to be a wife."  He took his bowl out to the tv to start their nightly viewing wars.  He wanted to watch one thing, Don would want to watch another.  It was playful arguing but about a nightly occurrence anymore.

Don brought his soup out and stole the remote to flip to the news.  He'd let Danny have it in a while.


Xander felt someone brush against his ass and grabbed their hand, glaring at them.  "Don't try to pickpocket me.  I'm not in the mood for this today."

Wade looked at the young guy over his sunglasses.  "He's in a really bad mood."  The guy ran off.  He looked at Xander.  "Do I have to bend you over to cure that bad mood?"

Xander grimaced.  "No.  I'm just a bit pouty."  He checked, he had his wallet.  His room key. Something crinkled like paper and he took it out to look at it.  He growled and crumpled it.  "We have an issue," he said, scanning around.

Wade snatched the paper to read, growling himself.  "That's not good."

Xander considered it.  "It says not to try to contact anyone."

"They usually do.  You can do that in other ways."  Xander stomped off, going to an alley and summoning a messenger demon to bring the note to Clay after he wrote on the back of it.  The demon took off after a bow.  Xander and Wade shared a look.  "Do what you gotta do and I'll act panicked," he said quietly, glancing around.

"Deal."  They walked off again.  If someone was watching what they were doing they'd be a bit upset but not wholly.  Xander's phone got a video sent to it.  He watched it.  His bad mood now was now epic since they were trying to torture Jensen and Cougar.  At the end it said 'I said tell no one' and an address.  Xander looked at Wade. "Can we come back for anything I miss?"

"Yup.  How long?"

"Two days."  He carefully put his phone back.  Wade was already connected to the main security group through his earpiece.  They were already in the video, trying to  figure out the clues to where they were.  He and Xander went back to browsing, though Xander only picked up some stuff to nibble.  Wade ordered some stuff to be shipped back to Miami.  This was not good.  This might make what happened in St. Louis look nice, like they were playing with zombie kittens.


Clay flinched as the demon appeared but took the note it held out.  "From?"  It bowed and left.  He looked at the outside of the folded note.  "Fuck.  Pooch, see if you can find Jensen!" he bellowed, opening it to read the inside.  "And Cougar."

"Not here," he said a minute later.  "I called Roque, they're not in LA and he hasn't heard anything.  Why?"

"Someone took 'em to get the kid for themselves."  He let him see the note.

"Damn that's going to be bad."  He found Jensen's phone on the charger in his apartment and looked up a few numbers.  He knew some great techs.  Pooch knew who one was so he talked to him.  "Mitzy, Pooch.  Someone stole Jensen and Cougar to get a GHS member to come to them."  He listened.  "That's good to know.  Any idea where in the US?"  He nodded once.  "Decent.  Thanks."  He hung up.  "They're still in the US," he called as he walked.  "I called Mitzy, he'll tell everyone."

"Let me tell his sister," Clay muttered, going to do that.  He didn't want to but she needed to know so she wouldn't worry too much.  On the way he texted Wade for any new information.  What he got back was a video that made him decide to go to the lab.  Kidnaping was a felony after all.


Horatio and his AV tech watched over the video.  "Can you figure out a location based on the window's view?" he asked quietly.

"Looks like a lot of very bright flowers."  He enlarged it to look.  "That's a palm tree."

"So we're talking somewhere warm.  Anything based on how it was sent?"

"If I had the original, yes.  Clay got it sent to him by Wade."

"Hack Xander's phone," Horatio ordered.  His tech nodded and turned to do that.  They found the video in the 'trash' folder, whoever had sent it had tried to delete it afterward.  "Does that give us any information?"

"Two things.  They're in Hawaii.  And they're using a satellite phone."

"Good to know."  He called Clay.  "Hawaii and they're using a satellite phone."  He hung up on the muttered swearing.  "There's a team out there if I remember right."

"They rescued you from what I heard," his tech offered with a grin.  "Want me to call?"

"No, let me."  He walked off to call out there, department to department.  He remembered the detective who had taken his statement.


Xander arrived on Hawaii that night.  It was a very long flight.  Private but long.  He found a good motel to check into.  Very low class.  He was trying to look like any normal tourist.  Hidden weapons but that was him being him.  He had talked to a detective out here who had said they couldn't do anything with the information they had so far.  That if they found out a more concrete set of information they'd gladly act on it to rescue the hostages.  So Xander was pissed off.

He left the motel after he had changed into a better, less sweaty t-shirt, and headed out to where his poker buddies would be locally.  He had called one in Miami and sworn him to only mention he needed some intel for a friend.  He found the bar.  He found the 'bard' who was trying to sing for money.  He dropped a few coins in and the guy stared at him.  He grinned back.  "Pieter said that you sang off key when you sing Clapton."

"Who're you?" he demanded.


"Pieter told me to talk to you.  What's up?"  Xander pulled out his phone to show him the video.  "Damn.  I know that guy but you can't get 'im."

Xander grinned.  "Bet me.  Where?  Anything else you can give me?"

One of the guys inside strolled out.  "Look, it's a fairy asking for directions," he sneered.

Xander looked at him then hit him once.  The guy went down.  "I've seen tougher drag queens than you.  And they can do it in heels."  He looked at the other guy again. Then he grinned.  "Please?"

"Who the fuck are you?" he asked quietly, glancing around.

"Xander.  Just like I am in Miami.  Only now they have a friend or two."  He grinned again.  "Address?"

The guy wrote down something.  "There's people investigating him."

"Yay.  Thanks."  He walked off with it.  This was not going to be a happy day.  He ran into a few gang kids who tried something and he beat one until he begged then stared at the others.  "I'm the toughest gay man you'll ever meet and I use a sword."

One flinched.  "I heard about you, man!"

Xander grinned.  "Someone here wanted to meet me *really* badly."  He held up the video to show them.  "Know him?"  They all whined and shook their heads.  "Thanks then.  Have a good night and he'll probably want some ice packs."  He walked over the one he had beaten and strolled off.  This was going to be a sucktastic day.  He walked back there.  "Where's the guy CJ who's on the local retrieval team?"

"They tend to go to a bar down by one of the scummier beaches," one of the gang kids said with a point.  "Ask to go to Mi-Lie's."

"Thanks."  He walked off again, catching a cab.  He wiped his knuckles off but that was about normal for him some days.  The cabbie knew the bar, though he did give him funny looks for it.  Xander walked in and someone choked.  He looked at them.  "Are you like Clay?"

"No," he said, blinking hard to clear the tears.  "He's in the back."  He pointed.  "Why are you here?"

Xander grinned.  "Someone wanted to meet me *really* badly.  Thanks."  He walked back there and sat down at the table, staring at the guy he knew was a retrieval team member.  He had looked him up after hiring the group in LA to go rescue some GHS and scientist hostages; CJ had been an earlier member on that team.  "Hi."

"Harris," he said with a small nod.  "You're on a world tour."  He showed him the video.  "That's Clay's boys."

"Yes they are."

CJ winced.  "No clue where they are."  Xander gave him what he had so far.  "That's a hard thing to get to."

Xander looked at him.  "Not when you can use a demonic messenger."

CJ snickered.  "You're not the average guy."

"No, I'm not, and they took friends and students."  He grinned.

"They are?" he demanded.

"You heard about some of the others in the society, the sword types?"

CJ shuddered.  "Unfortunately."

"They're my students."

"Crap," he muttered, finishing his ale.  "I can get you a map.  I know they're under surveillance."

"That would probably be why the detective I talked to said they couldn't do anything?"

"Possibly."  That made it worse.  "Let me call a few people?"

"I can get myself dinner if it's good here."

"It's not," he assured him, smiling slightly.  "It's bar food."

"I don't expect everyone to live up to what comes out of my kitchen."  He got up to order something and some soda.  The bartender gave him an odd look but got it for him.  Xander even tipped him nicely for it.  Then he sat down at the next table so CJ could talk quietly.

"Does anyone else know you're here?" CJ asked finally.

"Wade."  He ate a bite of burger.  "Not bad.  Juicy.  Bit undercooked but tasty meat."  He ate another bite.

"Wade?" CJ demanded, staring at him.  "Torturing, Canadian Wade?"

Xander grinned.  "He volunteered to be my assistant when someone brought him back to life after I killed Max."  He ate another bite and smiled while he chewed.

CJ gave him a strange look.  "I'm sure others must love that."

"He helps me do the artillery inventory every month too.  He's really calmed down since he and Anya torture succuba together."

"He's dating?" CJ demanded.  Xander grinned and nodded.  "Is she some sort of submissive?"

"Former vengeance demon.  I nearly married her but she thinks Wade is all that and better than I am."  He finished his burger and moved onto his fries.

CJ shook his head quickly.  "Miami's going to hell," he muttered.

"We're in Turkey."

"Figures."  He made another call and they knew about Wade, and it made his stomach and head both hurt.   He finally got what the kid needed and hung up.  "No hormoning obviously to get a distraction," he ordered, holding out the paper.

Xander grinned.  "Very minimally if I have to and individually instead of a cloud?"

"That'll work."  He handed it over.  "Be *subtle*.  Do you need me to find you help?"

"Nope."  He grinned and kissed him on the cheek.  "Thank you."  He walked off, going to a place where he could rent a car.  He wasn't going to take a cab on a rescue, or a motorcycle.  CJ had even drawn him a small map.  He found a good place to overlook the house.  There were obvious lurkers on the next street.  Two guys in a sedan, one napping, the other listening hard to some headphones by what he saw with the binoculars he had brought.  That helped.  He'd just have to be more subtle than usual.

He snuck down the small hill around to the left of the house.  The view was blocked for the listening officers.  He found a few guards and watched them for a minute then pulled out something from his emergency necklace bag.  He rolled it silently toward them and they fell as it went off.  That would last about an hour.  He snuck into the house and neck pinched a few more guards.  He ran into the main guy and sneered.  "You stupid idiot."  The man flinched and hopped up with a gun.  He shot at Xander and Xander killed him for it.  "Don't fuck with my hair," he growled.  He walked off, finding the guys in the upstairs locked cell.  He got them out and got hugs from Jensen.  "Car's up the hill."  They snuck back out, Cougar taking out a guard Xander had missed.  Then they went back to the hotel.

People had clearly underestimated him again.


Xander walked up to the detective he had talked to from Turkey.  "Detective?  I'm Xander Harris."

The detective sighed.  "I still can't do anything without more information."

Xander grinned.  "Don't worry about it.  Since you're so hampered I made sure they're fine myself.  I decided I should tell you so you don't have to worry or wonder.  You have a great day."  He walked off.

"Hold it!" a male voice shouted when he got outside.  Xander turned to look at them.  "Who're you?  You were spotted at an arm's dealer's house last night, sir."

"I was taking back two of the hostages he had and he's a really pathetic arms dealer.  I know *so* many better ones that'd call him a pussy."  He smiled.  "Is it a problem that I rescued my friends he had hostage to torture so he could have me?"

"What?" the detective demanded.

Xander sighed and looked around then at him.  "Call...."

"No, you explain it to me," he said, grabbing him.  Xander got free and the guy fought back.  Xander got him with a hairpin, making him yelp and move back.

"Don't grab me, dude.  Just...don't.  I've been kidnaped plenty of damn times and I don't give a damn *who* you are, you don't grab me."  He stared at him.  "I can give you a legal, official person you can ask all the questions you want.  He's a Lieutenant in Miami."

"I'd rather hear it from you."  He moved closer.  "Let's go talk."

Xander whistled and pointed, letting Jensen and Cougar get out of the car and follow.  "Part of Miami's retrieval team."  He grinned.  "They had them hostage."

"Retrieval for what?" the detective demanded.

"Um....  Shit, you don't know about the society," he muttered.  "I wonder who their liaison out here is."  He got into his phone and texted that to Sascha, who answered back.  "Huh.  McGarrett around here somewhere?"

The detective snorted.  "I doubt he'd like you."

"I think he can explain a few things to you," Xander shot back.  "And don't try to grab me again.  I have more deadly things than a hairpin on me."  He got a phone number and called it.  "Hi, I'm Xander Harris, and a society member.  I was actually rescuing some friends from a douchebag who had two of my friends hostage."  He looked up.  "No, we're at some other station and there's a detective here who thinks he can grab me.  Hair pin.  Thanks."  He hung up.  "He said he knows where we have to be so he'll be here in about ten minutes if you want to wait."  He smiled.

"I bet you're an arm's dealer too," the detective sneered.

"No, I only pet artillery.  I'd never sell the babies.  That'd be almost as mean as using them outside of apocalypse battles."  Someone behind him whimpered and he looked.  "Hi."  He smiled and waved.  Then looked at the detective again.  A cruiser pulled up and a guy got out of it with a sling on one arm.  "Car wreck?" he guessed.

"Gunshot wound."

"Those do suck, even when you heal pretty quickly," Xander agreed.  "Are you the guy Sascha said to talk to?"

"I am.  Who're you?"  Xander pulled out his wallet and showed him his ID and his society card.  The guy winced.  "Why are you on my island?"

"I was rescuing two friends who were being held hostage since one of your officers said he couldn't do anything about it."

Steve stared at him.  "What?"  Jensen walked over to give a report.  He growled at the other detective, who backed up a few steps.  "You ignored a report about him taking hostages?"

"We didn't see them!"

"Your watching team was around the corner, one was asleep when I got there, and the other looked really bored listening to things," Xander said.  "How much did they hear of me breaking in?"  He looked at the new guy and grinned.  "We're about to leave.  Do you need a statement?  I only came in to tell the detective I had talked to he didn't have to worry anymore."

"Fat chance.  I want a real report."

"I can try.  I've never been an officer but I dated two."

Steve stared at him.  "Do you drive your local PD nuts?"

"No, I tend to spoil them horribly by cooking them lunches and things."

Steve shook his head quickly.  "I don't need to know.  We're going to do a real report.  Now."

"Okay."  Xander texted the pilot that they'd be late, they were giving a police statement.  He said that was fine and he was amending the flight plans for that night and telling Wade.  "Okay, we're not leaving until six now and my assistant knows."  He followed him inside with Jensen and Cougar behind him.  He smiled at someone cute.  "Hi."

"Hi," he said, giving him an odd look.  "Are you under arrest?"

"No, but I need to give a statement.  Apparently there's not many guys like me around here."  McGarrett glared at him.  "What?"

"I don't know much about the society but I know most of them aren't as tough as you are."

"It's all nicer than a demon apocalypse."

McGarrett stopped to stare him down.  "You were at that thing in LA."

Xander nodded.  "I was, yeah.  Hair and all."  He smiled.  "He took my friends, of course I did something about it or else they'd think I'm weakening and fair game," he said quietly.

"That I understand," he admitted, opening an interrogation room so they could get a full statement from the very odd trio.  He noticed the tell-tale metal bead necklace one was wearing.  "Which branch?" he asked.

"Delta," Jensen said with a smile.  "I'm tech ops.  Cougs is a sniper.  We're now Miami's retrieval team."

"Interesting."  He sat down and went over what had happened, why, and what Xander had done.  He smirked at Jensen when he hit Xander on the arm over something.  "What sort of gas grenade was it?"

"My chemist makes them."  He pulled off the necklace bag and pulled one out, handing it to him with a grin.  "It's my emergency 'I've been kidnaped' kit."  Steve took it to look at since the canister was bigger than the bag.  "My engineer designed that one."



Steve glared.  "Really?"

Xander lit up a fairy light on the table and smiled.  "Yup.  I hired them to keep them off the open market and away from douchebags like that guy."

Steve shook his head quickly and touched the ball.  It moved like a normal ball.  It felt solid, not warm, and didn't make his skin itch, sweat, or even tickle.  "What is that?"

"Fairy light."  He reabsorbed it.  "I find them handy when I'm stolen to somewhere dark and dreary."

"Who took you this time?" Jensen asked, frowning at him.

"No one since Japan."


"Why were you in Japan?" Steve asked.

"I'm actually in the middle of a trip around the world.  Technically I'm supposed to be in Turkey right now."  He smiled.  "I planned it so I could see some sights I always wanted to see."

"Good to know."  He got back to the bag.  "You brought this into a police station?"

"I wear that everywhere because I've been taken from nearly everywhere in Miami."  He took it back.  Steve snatched it back to go back to looking.  "Don't open that," he said.  "It's shrank."  Steve looked at the writing on the side then at him, mouth slightly open.  "I've needed more than that before to get myself free.  I nearly panicked and got paranoid about the agents following us around in Russia because they hate my assistant."

Steve dumped the rest out, looking for other tiny little artillery boxes.

"You brought that?" Jensen asked, picking one up to look at it.  "Why not the better one?"

"I left that in case you guys or Dean and Sam needed it, or Horatio."

"I guess that makes sense."  He put it back on the table at the dirty look he was getting.  Jensen smiled.  "We do his artillery inventory for him, Detective."

"Lieutenant Colonel," he corrected.

Jensen smiled.  "We're on Clay's team."

"I've heard of you guys."  He looked at Xander.  "Are you sure you're society?"  Xander let his hormones go a bit and Steve blinked.  "Quit.  That."  Xander forced them back down.  He glared.  "You're a what level?"

"Ten.  Perpetually backed up too because I broke up with my boyfriends right before I went on the trip because they treated me like the dogs."

Steve groaned.  "We'll be escorting you to your plane, Harris."

"Okay.  I was going to get lunch on the way."  He relaxed some and repacked his bag so he could find everything.

"Are you carrying any other weapons?  And what did you use to hurt the idiot?"

"Hair pin."  He pulled one out to show him.  Steve shook his head quickly so Xander pulled out his second-best sword and let it expand.  Steve gave him a dirty look.  Xander beamed.  "They're very handy at times.  No one ever expects a sword or hair pins."

"I wouldn't have expected those from a guy either," McGarret admitted.  He finished the statement and stood up.  "Stay.  I'll escort you personally to your plane."  Xander nodded, getting comfortable and checking Jensen's remaining injuries.  He found the higher ups waiting.  "He's *society*."

"As in rich?" the police commissioner asked.


That got a wince.  "Damn."  Steve gave him the report and he glared at a few detectives up the hall.  "I'll have that investigated."  He huffed.  "Anything else?"

"I'm going to check on his actual skills, just in case."  He walked off to call someone.  Then he called Miami.


Xander looked up as another guy walked in after knocking.  "Hi.  You don't look like the lieutenant colonel."

"I'm his partner.  He's calling someone in Miami to tell them what happened."  He smiled.  "Danny Williams."

Xander smiled and shook his hand.  "Xander Harris.  These are Jensen and Cougar, my buddies."

"Nice to meet you guys.  I've met some of the local retrieval team."  He sat down in the free seat.  "Do you guys need anything?  Medical?  Aspirin?"

"We all heal pretty fast," Xander said with a smile.  "How old is your daughter?"  The detective gave him a strange look.  "It's the tie.  Even Don's ties aren't kid present ties."

Danny looked down then smiled.  "She's eight."

"That's a great age.  My niece is nine," Jensen said with a smile.  "She's really good at soccer and learning hacking from me and her mom."

"She going to follow you?" Detective Williams asked with a grin.

"Hell no I'd never let her go special forces.  They'd ruin her."

"I can understand that."  He looked at Xander.  "How long have you been here?"

"I landed just before sunset last night.  Why?"

"We got news that someone beat up a few gang kids."

"Well, one tried to hit me.  The other tried to gay bash so I just knocked him down.  I was sent to that bar to talk to a poker buddy's contact for information."

Detective Williams nodded.  "That's handy.  You play poker?"

"With half the underground in Miami," Jensen said dryly, nudging Xander with a shoulder.  He grinned back.  "They missed you.  Anya's been really mean with Wade."

"Anya's pet monkey had better not get near my ferrets again."

"I'm sure she won't but she has bought her a lot of cutesy outfits, and some new kevlar ones for when she wants to make her eat gang kids."

"A cannibal monkey?" Danny asked.  Xander found his phone and the site, letting him see it.  He read and shook his head.  "I heard something about the NYPD banning those as soon as they heard about it.  I have buddies up there."

Xander took his phone back and put it into his pocket.  "I was dating two former NYPD people who moved to Miami but they treated me like the dogs."

"That sucks.  Your boyfriends should always treat you better than any pet or other belonging you own," he said.  Xander beamed and nodded.  He was a nice guy.  A very sweet, nice guy who obviously cared about his friends.  "What're you doing now?"

"We're on vacation around the world.  Supposedly I'm in Turkey right now.  Wade's covering for me."

"Wade, the monkey?"

"No.  Anya's dating Wade, my assistant, but she named her monkey after him because she didn't want to travel with us."

"That makes more sense."

McGarrett stomped in and stared at them.  His partner was giving the guy a flirty smile and looked too relaxed.  "Lieutenant Caine said he'd be spanking you when they joined you in Greece."

"That's great news.  Horatio wasn't sure he and Speed could get time off to join us."  He grinned.  "Any other happy news from Miami?"

"Not that they shared."  He glared at his partner, who only grinned back.  "Let's get you to the airport.  Maybe they can let you go earlier.  That way you can drop them off on the way back to Turkey."

"Sure."  He smiled at the other detective.  "Thank you for being so understanding and nice while you guarded us."  He shook his hand.  "I hope you have a great, easy caseload this month."  He walked out with Jensen beside him.  "We can travel back together, Lieutenant Colonel.  I'm very safe with Jensen and Cougar.  We've went nearly everywhere together, even got taken to Honduras together."

"No, that'd be unsafe.  We want you to be really safe while you're here, Mr. Harris."

"Call me Xander.  I'm not formal and you're not as big of an asshole as the guy who tried to grab me."

McGarret looked at him.  "Sure.  Lunch on the way?"  They smiled and nodded.  "We can do that.  Is everything in the car?"

"We were heading to the airport anyway," Xander said.

"Good."  He got in to go with them.  That way nothing could possibly happen on the way there.  There would be no kidnapings, no hormone bombs, nothing that would make his job more difficult.  Of course, on the way they ran into a huge fight in a park.  Xander made him stop because he had opened the door and hopped out.  "What are you doing?" he demanded.

"I can make them stop.  I help in Miami sometimes that way."  He concentrated and checked the wind then moved to be upwind from them.  Then he let his hormones rip.  Suddenly, the fight became a lot less violent and a lot more moanable.  Xander beamed.  "There, now it's not a public hazard anymore."  He got into the car and Jensen tested his finger.  "I'm fine!"

"Hush," Cougar ordered, watching their escort try to decide how to call that in.  His partner showed up with more officers to break up the orgy that was about to start.  "Nicer than a brawl."

"Much nicer," Xander agreed with a grin for him.  McGarrett finally hung up and got into the car, taking them to the airport.  Though he did let them talk him into going through a drive-thru for some food.  The pilot changed their departure time again and took off while the detective watched to make sure they left.

McGarrett drove the rental car back to the park and got out, leaning on the roof to watch the officers.  "He hormoned them," he said quietly when he spotted the governor.  She gave him a funny look.  "A *society* member.  He decided to be helpful."

"I heard you had one giving a statement."  McGarrett gave her a dirty look.  "Were they kidnaped to here?"

"No.  He was rescuing people who were.  The police commissioner knows."

"Wonderful.  I'll chew on him in a few minutes."  She watched the officers break that up.  "Any precautions?"

"Put them in separate cells after a shower," he said dryly.  "That way we don't have anyone attacked."

"I can order that."  She walked over to order that to be done.  The guys all agreed it was a good idea.

Steve drove off to talk to his partner.  His partner who had flirted.  They had to have a talk right then about that sort of thing.  Because Steve would not allow his partner to flirt with anyone else.  So what if he sounded like a possessive husband?


Horatio stared at the two men that walked into his office.  "Are you two all right?"

"Mostly," Jensen quipped.  "The guy was a woose about torture."  He flopped down.  "Is Xander's new traveling companion there yet?"

"Yes.  Wade had to put him off for a few hours yesterday."  They shared a look.  "When he told him why, the person demanded Wade to follow him because he said that's what minions did.  So he's now got a dislocated jaw."

"Xander will baby him," Jensen decided.  "Did that mean one upset you?"

"No, I believe he was more freaked out," Horatio admitted.  "Apparently he expects Xander to be like most of the society.  Meek, sweet, looking for protection."

"Which isn't Xander," Cougar agreed.  Horatio smiled and shook his head.

"Anyway, we cured him.  Clay's on his way here to pick us up because Xander told the guy he called to pick us up to bring us here."

"Clay has been helping since we've had a new arms dealer move into town."

"Maybe we'll introduce Xander the next time he's in town," Jensen quipped.

"I doubt he'd like to play poker with him.  He had an altercation with one of the other gay members of the circuit until someone stopped them.  Then he laughed that they were protecting them."

Cougar smiled.  "Xander's restocking."

"Oh, dear," he muttered, calling someone.  "Xander's in town to restock on his way back to Turkey."  He hung up on the swearing, wincing at it.  "Someone is not happy."

"I'm sure someone will tell Xander he hates gay people."  Jensen smirked at Horatio, who moaned and shook his head, texting Xander's phone.  "Anyway, Hawaii was pretty, what we saw of it.  Xander totally busted some cops' chops for not caring we were being held hostage.  The guy that Sascha said to call out there was like Xander only more growly and had less hair.  Though Xander did have that happy glow about his partner."  Horatio slumped and shook his head.  "Without busting him for it but there was a brawl in a park that was getting out of hand that Xander decided to help with."

"Danced?" Horatio asked, sounding hopeful.

"No but he's not backed up any more."  Horatio shuddered.  "The liaison officer was escorting us."

"That's something at least."  Clay knocked and leaned in.  "Xander got them back."

"I heard from CJ, who chewed on me and Wade about letting him out alone.  He had no idea any member of the society or any demon hunter could pull that off."  He looked at them.  "You two good?"

"He was a woose about the torture," Jensen quipped.  "Jolene's given me worse."

"Fine, whatever, let's go, boys, so Horatio can get his paperwork done before he goes on vacation.  No one deserves his level of paperwork on his first day back."

"Did they tell you Xander fixed a brawl?" Horatio asked him.

"CJ did mention that," he said dryly.  "And that he scared the crap out of people out there."  His team members followed him out and down to their SUV.  "Anything to report?"

"Xander's restocking," Cougar said.

Clay looked at him.  "Hell no!"  He called him.  "Get on the plane and go back to Wade so you're safe, Xander," he ordered into the voicemail.


Xander walked into Fu's and blew a kiss at someone.  "Running though to pick up something," he quipped at the stares.  "Yes I know I'm supposedly in Turkey or Hawaii." 
"Jesus, doesn't Miami have enough of them?" someone sneered.

Xander turned and smirked.  "Get up and say it to my face, putz."  The guy sneered and took a swing.  Xander destroyed him after that free swing.  Xander stared down at him.  "How much will you squeal when you're getting the gay sex in prison?"  He smirked.  "I think you'll learn to like it a lot since you're going to be pathetic for your first month in there."  He patted him down, finding his ID.  "Anyone want him beyond Horatio?"  Fu took the ID and nodded.  "Who?"


Xander beamed.  "That means I can thank the nice liaison officer for not yelling about sticking one of the detectives with a hairpin."  He attached a message to him and summoned a messenger demon.

"Not in the restaurant," Fu complained.

"He doesn't leave slime, Fu.  He's a messenger."  He wrote out the note.  The demon glared at him.  He charmed him and the demon huffed but took him anyway.  "There.  Now, let me get into a bag.  I need something fantastic for dinner on the way to Turkey."  He grabbed some cash and some food and went out to grab something else on the way over there.  He had missed ice cream.

Fu whimpered.  "He needs a new boyfriend."

"Or three," someone quipped.

"That might not be enough," Fu complained, calling Horatio to let him know what had happened.


In Hawaii, a car on the pretty coastal highway had to suddenly stop when a body landed in front of them.  They got out and moved to check him.  The cops in the car smirked at each other and loaded their prisoner into the trunk.  There was no backseat in the car and he couldn't ride on the hood.

They'd find the note later and Steve would have a good, long laugh about it.  Though he still needed to talk to his partner.


Wade looked up as someone knocked on the hotel room door.  He opened it and relaxed.  "You good, kid?"

"I'm fine.  Everyone's fine and the gay bashing idiot in the poker circuit went to someone who wanted to see him in Hawaii."  He grinned.  "I have knots in my hair I can't work out."

"Your new boytoy is pouting."

Xander grinned and went to his room, pouncing him since he was having a nap.  "Hi, I'm Xander."

The guy grinned back.  "I'm Rice."  He took a kiss.  "Need a nap?"

"I need to work the knots out of my hair and then nap.  Horatio sent a strongly worded email to get out of warrior Xander mode and back into cuddly Xander mode."

Rice smiled.  "We can work on that."  Xander beamed and took another kiss, stripping down and getting a brush to work on his hair.

Wade closed the bedroom door.  He did not need to see Xander pouncing his new traveling companion.  He knew more than enough about gay sex already.


Sascha, the female member of the guard team, watched as Xander and Rice walked down the stairs together chatting.  She mentally winced at how Rice was wobbling and walking like his back hurt.  That was a really bad sign.  Wade was looking less than tolerant.  Clearly his nympho reputation was overstated.  "Xander, what did he have planned?"

"I found notes saying he was going to show up and take me to some special, expensive places to show me how well he could treat me.  The five hundred dollar hair treatment in London that hold satellite dust or something in it, a cheese tasting with the gold-laced stilton cheese, that stuff."

"There is?" Wade asked.

"Yeah.  It's special for the holidays."  He grinned.  "It's got edible gold leaf and cinnamon schnapps infused into it."

Wade shook his head.  "It'd probably taste funny.  Stilton's a blue cheese, right?"  Xander nodded.  "Definitely strange with the cinnamon.  Any other great plans?"

"Something about a monogrammed traveling trunk, a spa on the coast of Mexico, all expensive things to flout his wealth but I'm not looking for a deep wallet.  I have one of those already."

"You do and I'm getting one of those trunks for you for your birthday."

Xander beamed.  "Is it big?"

"It's fairly roomy and nice.  They custom make them so they'll last."

"That might be nice."  He hugged him quickly.  "Thanks, Wade."  He bounced off after Rice, helping him into his seat so they could order dinner.

"What have I told you about hugging?" Wade complained, cracking up the others on the security team.

"I had a good day, Wade.  I sent the gaybasher from Miami's poker circuit to someone as a thank you for being so tolerant of me present."

"We had a gaybasher?" Wade asked, sitting down on Xander's other side.

"Yeah. He called me a fairy.  I should've quipped I'm not the Xander with the wings and he's mean."  He grinned.  "Hells, Hess, something like that."

Wade got into his phone to text someone.  "Huh.  They're going to be really happy.  They've got a vendetta hunt on him, and yeah he's an asshole."  He grinned at Xander, who beamed back.  He looked at Rice.  "Want a pillow?"

"I fell onto the floor," he complained.

Xander cooed and patted him, making him feel better. He'd put up with it.  Later that night he pulled Wade into the hall to talk to him about Xander.  Clearly Xander needed more than he could handle and he was a bit of a fusser.  Most agents and commandos didn't really know how to deal with that.


Xander walked out the next morning, blinking at the man standing there.  "Hi," he said.  "Who the fuck are you?"

"Rice sent for me, Xander."

Xander was still staring at him while scratching his braid.  "Why?"

"Can we talk?"

"Um...  No.  Wade!"  Wade came rushing out of his room, his shirt unbuttoned.  "Rice called him to come talk to us?"

"Not that I was aware of," he admitted, staring the guy down.  "Xander, does your head itch?"

"I can't find my sword."  He went to find it.  Not on the bed or the dresser.  He huffed and summoned them back.  With his hairpins.  Both swords landed in their full size with blood on the blades.  He cleaned them off and inspected them then shrank them and put them back into his hair.  The pins as well.  He walked out.  "Whoever had my sword they got cut."  He stared at him.  "Now, who are you?"  He sat down after pouring himself some coffee.  This was clearly something he'd need caffeine for.

"Rice thought we should meet."

"Hell no," Wade sneered.

"Must your guard dog be here?"

Wade punched him.  "I'm keeping him from killing you," he sneered.

"Horatio will complain if I kill you," Xander agreed.  Someone knocked.  "Who is it?" he called.  He heard a muffled 'police' in Arabic and sighed, looking at Wade.  Who nodded.  Xander got up to answer the door.  "This man was in my suite when I got up. I do not know who he is but my traveling companion supposedly called him."  The officer stared at him.  Xander stared back.  "Is my accent that bad?" he asked in English.

"No," the officer said in Arabic.  "I was told someone in this room screamed for help?"

"He was standing there when I got up," Xander said with a point.  "I yelled for my assistant."  He let the officer and the hotel security in.  "Where is my traveling companion?  I'd like to kick his ass."  He got more coffee and sipped it.  The man lunged at him and Xander spun-kicked him, making him fall down whimpering.  "Not wise," he assured him.

Wade buttoned up his shirt.  "Let me finish getting dressed," he complained, going to his room to do that.  He came out to put on his shoes.  "I don't know who he is."

The officer nodded, calling his boss about that.  The hotel security people fussed over Xander.

Xander looked at the officer.  "Someone had my hairpins and hair swords but I summoned them back.  I'm sorry if they got cut," he said quietly once the hotel person was outside to tell their manager.

The officer looked confused.  "What?"  Xander pulled his sword out and let it expand.  "Oh," he said, blinking a few times.  "We do not like that skill."

Xander shrank it and put it back, smiling at him.  "I hunt things that hurt others.  I was at the thing in LA."

The officer nodded.  "I know of the Council."

"I worked with one of their people until they turned on me."  He finished his coffee.  "I'm sorry about whoever got hurt when I fixed that."

"I will let that be known if I hear about it."  He arrested the person and hauled him up.  "Why was he in here?  It is not usual for men like you to visit our country."

Xander grinned.  "I'm on a world tour of the important sights."

"Wonderful.  We have many historical things."  He left, going to make a report to his boss.  The man was very vocal about how Xander should be his and why.  He heard the word hormone and shut him up.  They could wake him up in the station to talk to him.  That explained a lot about the young one.  Former Council and now he had that horrible problem.  It was a harsh punishment for dealing with those things they didn't like to admit existed.

Xander and Wade shared a look.  "Two days, right?"

"One day.  We leave at noon the next day."  He stood up.  "You okay?"

"I'm fine but I was having a happy night."  He grimaced.  "We need to go eat breakfast.  It'll be safer around people.  Then we can see the stuff I missed?"

"We can," Wade agreed.  "Get dressed and all that."  Xander nodded, going to do that.  Wade texted Clay to make sure he knew things had gotten wrong.  This was not a great start to this leg of the trip.


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