Demon Criminal Investigative Services:  Big Moves

Daniel looked over the report he had gotten from the DoD on their independent tests of some of the building trio's gear, smiling at the subtle begging.  He'd ignore them until they coughed up money.  He put it aside and went back to the other reports he had to pass on.  "Xander, why do I have a report on Dawn?" he called.

Fargo walked in, closing the door before looking at him.  "I told him but the other's don't know," he said quietly.  He sat down.  "I was going to check on her on my way to the college bookstore for a new book I'd been wanting.  She wasn't home but I saw a party a few buildings up so I thought I'd ask there.  It turns out she was there, had just defended herself against three boys and one behind the bar that had tried to drug her drink, and was pressing charges with the officers.

"She'd had a drink, and the second one she found floating pills, which she pulled out."  Daniel moaned.  "She snarled at them.  One of them told her she was going to be a party favor anyway.  She apparently proved she did learn quite a lot from Dean and Xander both.  That's why the police were already there.  She handed him the pills and her drink.  She was complaining about the guys.  I stepped in and offered to take her home."

"Please tell me she's not in jail for defending herself?" Daniel asked.

"No, the boys are not pressing charges and one has been expelled.  The problem is that when we got her home, and she was more than a bit tipsy from that single drink, we found her balcony door open and a few dead rats in her kitchen and hallway.  I went to get one of the officers since they were still there arresting the boys.  They found her bed had a heart-shape on it made up of dead rats.  The others had been a trail leading to it."  Daniel grimaced, shaking his head.

"She was nearly asleep on her futon by that time so I let her sleep while they called someone to clean it up for her.  That's their reports, both incidences, and the bloodwork I took for House since he wanted to know what alcohol did to witches when I called to ask his opinion on letting her sleep it off.  I did tell Xander when I got back that night.  He was not happy with her going to a party but John got him calmed down."

"Good.  Is she going to stay in school?"

"As far as we know, yes, but if she gets another rat present she might come running back while we figure out if it's demon related or just a mean frat prank."

Daniel sighed, rubbing his eyes.  "Okay, that's good to know.  Did it seem demonic?"

"I couldn't be sure.  The officer who came to check on the rats was told that her big brother was a federal agent.  Dawn had told him that while promising that Xander was going to kick those boys' around for quite a while."

"Yeah, I think it'd be a good show," Daniel said dryly.  "I remember guys like that in college."

"Me too," he agreed with a smirk.  "Anyway, we're not sure and it's best to have it on file in case something else happens."

"Did you get your book?"

"I did.  I left her with the responding officer while he was waiting on someone to do the CSI thing."

"Even better.  Thank you, Fargo."

"Not a problem.  I like Dawn.  She's a good girl like Zoe is."

Daniel smirked.  "If she's in that much trouble I'm going to let her go to Eureka to traumatize them into sending reports."

"I'll ask where they are."  He left the office, going back to his own to call out there.  "Doctor Blake, it's Fargo.  Daniel was wondering when the next set of reports was coming in.  Yes, they do tend to.  Because Abby has NID and Area 51 under her as well," he admitted.  She shuddered.  "Exactly, so they expect frequent updates, even if it's almost nothing.  Thank you.  I'm here, sure."  She hung up and he went to lean back in there.  "She said she understood after I told her about the other things Abby lorded over.  I told her even minor updates would be fine.  She'll fax over something later."

"That's fine with me, Fargo.  Thank you."

"Welcome."  He smiled and went back to work.  Xander walked in and dropped three reports on his desk.  "You haven't left the base."

"Yeah, I know.  Those are for the judge who's looking at some of the prisoners."  He shrugged.  "You might get one from Spenser too.  He's our profiler."

"That's fine, Xander.  Not like I do a lot anyway."  He smiled.  "Daniel has the report on what happened to Dawn."

"Even better.  The fact it was rats bothers me.  Rats have too many meanings."  He walked down to Daniel's office.  "Any new word from Dawn?  She's been avoiding talking to me because she said I was fussy."

"No, not yet.  Did you want to head up there to check on her?"

He smirked.  "I'm heading up with Buffy to hand over allowance and let her sister take her shopping."

"That'll probably work best with her," he agreed.  "Let me know if there's a new problem."

"I will.  Especially if it turns into a case."

"She's your sister, you can't investigate; that's a conflict of interest," he pointed out gently.

"I know.  But I can ask someone."  He grinned, heading back to his desk.  "Guys, if Dawn runs into problems at the school, who wants to investigate it?"

"I can," Stella offered.  "Has she already?"  He went to get the report, handing to her.  She grimaced as she read.  "I remember guys like that in college.  I kicked one's butt in gym for a few weeks."  She finished reading and put it on her desk.  "I'll look into it, make sure she's not having more problems."

"Thanks.  I'm driving Buffy up tonight for some sisterly shopping time."

"I'm sure they'll have a lot of fun," Calleigh said with a grin.  "Anything new for cases?  I saw you doing reports."

"For the judge."

"I've got to finish my last one for him too."  She got back to it.  "We haven't had a case in nearly a week."

Xander looked at her.  "Don't jinx us."

"I'm not trying to.  I'm wondering why."

"Summer slowdowns are nice," Ryan reminded her.  "But a week is odd."

Xander sighed and got online to look things up.  "Daniel?"  He came out of the office.  "Congress is questioning whether or not we're useful again."

Daniel read the report from the underground newspaper.  "That doesn't explain why we don't have cases.  Call someone in your contacts."  He printed it and went to call the senators mentioned.  And the president.  Well, maybe him first.  "Sir," he said when he answered the video call.

"Doctor Jackson.  Is there a huge problem coming?"

"I was about to ask you that, sir."  He faxed over the article.  The president was handed it a moment later and groaned.  "We haven't had cases in a week.  Were we canceled?"

"No.  I haven't seen anything with that."  He reread it then put it aside.  "Let me talk to the hidebound idiots.  Are you doing all right with the extra personnel?"

"They've been very helpful when someone tried to invade the base to steal Xander, sir.  He was on that board in Las Vegas of people who might date him and tried to cheat by blowing up our gate and guard house."

"I got a report from someone about how a new weapon you were testing solved that," he said dryly, giving him a pointed look.

"Xander's tinkering," he agreed.  "I've said that anything those three or Abby creates that's classified in the lab, beyond her forensics projects, the other agencies can ask politely and we'll see if they want to buy them, sir.  The same as they had to at the SGC," he said when the president opened his mouth.

"Good point, you did make them buy stuff from you if they wanted it."

"Yes we did and I'm keeping to that.  I know they were quite impressed with Xander's tinkering bout this time."

"Why is he building weapons suddenly?"

"That foreseen base assault this upcoming spring.  He wants to make sure we have enough of everything we might need for it."

"That's reasonable I guess, but a bit paranoid."

"Our arms master got him a few of them's plans."

"Even better.  I was hoping he hadn't been possessed by some weapons genius."

"Actually, the last possession during that halloween, the ones who inhabited Xander did build some weapons, sir.  They also built their own version of the robot that's Tara's reborn body.  They made one of Buffy Summers."  He groaned at that.  "Beyond that, yes, they could build anything they wanted."

"I've been avoiding building the stun and freeze ray," Xander said as he walked past the door.  "The judge and our prison people wanted a conference."

"I'll talk to them in a few, Xander.  Thank you."

"Welcome."  He went back to his desk.

Daniel looked at him.  "Some of it was quite nice.  Xander did test a new explosive device that saved us a lot of money demolishing that extra building that was ready to fall in."

"Smart ass," he said dryly.

"The rubble was small enough to pick up by hand, sir."


"Jack's already claimed it."

"Of course he has.  I have every faith that he'll get into a situation where he needs it," he said dryly.  "Any other problems?"

"Not yet, sir.  As far as we know.  Have you heard of any?"

"No, I hadn't.  I'll check on that article.  You find out if this slowdown is a bad one."

"It could be.  I'm having Xander call around to check."

Tony stomped in and walked around to be seen.  "Sir, look out your west windows for me please?  One of Abby's friends called her and asked if that was a prank in response to that article.  I need to know what it is so we can tell the slayers."

He did that then moved the camera so he could see it.  "What is that?"

"I didn't know Fyarl got that large," Daniel said.

"Which means there's magic and it's probably that little bastard in Delaware again.  Xander, check on the little chaos twerp!  There's a congress sized Fyarl demon in DC.  It's presently humping the Washington Monument."

Xander came in to look then looked at him.  "He's magicless and Ethan said so.  Ethan was giggling madly about something though."

"If that's Ethan's doing I'm going to arrest him personally," Tony assured him.

"He's in China this week."

"Damn it.  Too far?"  Xander nodded.  "Anyone else?"

"No clue.  Ask Rosenburg and your former director since the prison guys warned me they were getting chummy?"

"Shit," he muttered, going to check on that.  "Guys, did we move Rosenburg out of the magically null area?" he asked as he walked into that office.

"We've been giving her things to suppress her magic, Agent DiNozzo."

"I don't think it's working."  He walked down there, glaring at the two women who were now in cells next to each other.  "If the Fyarl is yours, stop it, now."

"They don't believe," she told him.  "Jenny was right, it'll cause problems for the slayers and you guys.  We can't have that since we can't work to save everyone ourselves anymore."

"I don't care!" he shouted.  "It's humping national monuments!"

"Fine."  She muttered something and it went back down.  "There, better?"

"Much."  He pointed.  "Move her back to the magically null section," he said as he walked off.  He went back up to Daniel's office.  "Is it down?"

"Yes.  Thank you."

"They had her moved because they were giving her things to block her magic."


"I ordered her moved back."

"Thank you," the president said, drinking some milk.  "Let me go tell them what happened."

"She said that they didn't believe and Sheppard told her how they'd cut the agency and go after the slayers for doing their jobs, sir.  That's why she did it.  Those are usually harmless, they shoot paralyzing snot out of their armpits and noses."

"That's disgusting," he decided.  He hung up, calling someone who was probably throwing a fit.  "The witch who did it is already in custody at DCIS.  Former Director Sheppard told her how you'd cut DCIS out of the budget and then go after the slayers if you didn't believe.  That was Rosenburg's version of show and tell."  He took another drink.  "No, she's still in the jail.  They moved her back to a magically null section.  Yes, that one.  Multiple charges but I'm not sure what.  She's got a good few years there, the same as Jenny Sheppard does."  He finished his milk and handed his guard the glass, getting a nod and him taking it back to the kitchen for him.

"Yup, that's why she did it.  You might warn the others.  By the way, saw the article about  going after DCIS.  Do you want to deal with those things and the next invasion or situation like in Georgia?  Exactly.  That's why the one made them.  Beyond that, I'd rather have all those agents and officers that give us such headaches out there together.  Where we don't have to see them every day.  Any other concerns, come to me personally and I'll talk to Jackson."  He hung up and took a tums.  Never enough calcium in his diet anyway.

His guard looked at him.  "Sir, the Fyarl was captured by DC Metro according to the person on communications.  They've called the house in Cleveland to see what they want to do with it since it appears to be slightly intelligent but not a speaking species."  The secretary came in with a fax.  "From Spenser Reid, sir, from their manual."  He let him see it.

He read it over then handed it back.  "Consider it like a frat prank, let the girls deal with it.  Do we have a slayer locally?"

"No, sir.  I can suggest that."

"I can suggest it faster."  He called Daniel back.  "When do we get a slayer of our own?"  He hung up again and went to  his next meeting.  The Japanese Foreign Minister had probably seen it all.  "Frat prank by a witch," he said in greeting when the man was making squeaky, horrified noises and pointing.  He checked, it wasn't back.  "Slayers's Council is taking care of the demon and handing it to DCIS if they need to charge it."

The man cleared his throat.  "DCIS?"

"Demon Criminal Investigative Services.  It's an investigative agency for federal level demon crimes.  Most major cities either have their own office or are planning on adding one within a year."

"The ones who were at the invasion with all those girls?"


"I wonder if other countries are setting up their own."

"Canada has.  Chicago has a strong liaison with them and when they set up theirs he passed back information to his superiors.  Just in time to stop a demon smuggling ring coming through the borders."

"I saw that series of busts on tv.  I should gather information on that."

"I can give you the liaison's name if you want.  He probably has the name of the one in Canada who set things up."

"I would enjoy that."  The president looked at his guard, who went to get it for him.  He smiled.  "I know we have slayers in Asia who have their own house."

"In upper India I'm told.  That way they can stay out of the most dangerous political areas.  They're to stay strictly out of politics and all that stuff."

"That's very reasonable.  They can't do their job if they're off spouting rhetoric for some political cause."  He sat down and went over the matter that he had wanted to talk about today.  By the end, he had the name and number of the person in Canada who had set up their local offices.  That way they could see if Japan needed her own.  Plus the names of the head of the office in Germany, France, and Egypt.


Daniel met with Sheppard, Jack, and McKay in his office this time.  "Anything new to report on Atlantis, guys?"

"GD has some ideas about possibly recharging.  They're going to test them this week," McKay said.

"Good.  Then what?"

"We're definitely moving it off the planet.  The Dadelus crew talked with Teyla and the Athosians.  They don't like that disease either but they realize they're immune when we're not.  They agreed it'd be safer since there's still wraith."

"Can we move the gate and keep the same address?" Jack asked.

"Yes, the address is to the gate itself, not to a physical location for the gate," Daniel assured him.  McKay nodded to back that up.  "How long would it take to move her?"

"If we can get the Zed PM's charged fully, it should take us a few weeks to move it into a new orbit and then find a good landing spot and land.  The translation matrix Charles Epps came up with was magnificent in finding us what we needed.  It can be flown and landed again as long as we have the power."

"Is there a good place for it?" Jack asked.

"If we're going with a redundant backup plan, the same planet that has Xander's temple is good.  It's shielded by an ion cloud just past the heliosphere so the wraith never go there.  It's got a second gate on the planet itself in case of emergencies plus however Xander manages to get up there, and others like Doctor Mallard."

"Their planet's fairly populous but not overcrowded, their water's drinkable, their atmosphere is good to breathe, and they have a good bit of herbs that are noted for healing purposes."

"Plus they like us.  We sent some of the ones healing there to rest when they got better sooner than the rest," John said.  "They offered it to Xander.  Their herbs did wonders for getting them back on their feet faster, sir."

"Good, I like that.  They won't mind?"

"We need to talk to them but Teyla hasn't went to do that yet.  She's doing that today."

"So we can see if we can move it then plan the move.  We'll need Caldwell's support?"

"It'll take a good six months to move things," McKay said.

"Which Dawn can't help with," Daniel added.  "She said that she can't hit a moving target."

Rodney nodded.  "Abby knows it'll take about six months."

"Good.  I didn't want to see her do more than pout.  And of course, if you two wanted to be married before then, we can arrange it."  Rodney nodded once but he was smiling.  "Will the others like that planet?"

"After that game, most of the bigger problems have stopped," John said.  "I'm going to see if Xander can get me up there tomorrow to talk to them with Teyla."

"Xander?" Daniel yelled.  He leaned in a minute later.  "Can you get John to your temple to talk to them about moving the city?"


"Teyla's going to be there tomorrow morning local time," he told him.

"I can help you go tonight."  He left again.

"That'll be handy," John agreed.  "We'd want to keep the city to itself but available in case of problems like we did before."

"That's a plan I like," Jack agreed.  "That way we don't interfere too much in the native populations."

Daniel nodded.  "Definitely a good idea.  He's never said anything about any threatening species but I know he said that there's at least one dragon up there from the game."

"We won't be bothering that," John said firmly, smiling slightly.  "Most of my guys are tired and want to be back to normal things."

"I can understand why.  Even we do sometimes, Sheppard," Daniel said with a smile of his own.  "Those days, Xander gets to go out on cases that make his reputation grow."

The others laughed.  "He does a bit too much of that," Jack agreed.  "So we can move it if we get the power.  It'll take about six months then resetting up time?"  They both nodded.  "So we'll need Caldwell there to ride shotgun and minimal support in the city itself during the move."

"Already worked on those plans," John said, handing them over.  "That's who we need on base to move it.  The rest can be in the ship or nearby.  That's medical, cooking, science core to help it move and fix anything that breaks during it.  Some limited fighters in case something tries to board, but I don't think anything can get through the shields.  We have sealed areas by the stuff McKay got into in case the shields fail for a few minutes.  That'll keep us breathing instead of in open space."

"Good."  He handed them to Daniel.  "So, six months of flying through space.  You'd be on weapons and navigation?"

"I can be."

"It looks like there's a flight plan for putting in gate coordinates," McKay offered.  "Input them and then do any final tinkering while the computer sets the path."

"Even better," Jack agreed.  "We have one project that's going to be doing space the usual way.  I'm going to have them liaison with you."

"That'd be fine," John agreed.  "We're newbies at this.  I'm sure they have more idea than we do, sir."

"Good."  He looked at McKay.  "If you want to do it, all your friends are here right now.   It may keep some of the moping down and if something should happen, at least she has that," he said quietly.

McKay nodded.  "We've both been thinking about it, even though neither of us are ready for more than what we have at the moment."

"You can pretend to date for years yet," Sheppard told him.  "This way if something happens, she can claim all your work and hide it."

"She already has it."

"If the military comes, being a fiancee isn't enough," Daniel told him.  "When I died the last time, they had my team come pack my things and there were people who wanted to go through it nearly as soon as they got done.  Even with Jack as executor of my estate, they said it wasn't legally enough.  With a spouse or someone legally responsible for it, they'd have to get a court order.  It'd still probably happen but it'd be a longer shot to give her some warning."

McKay nodded.  "That is reasonable."

"If you're not legally together, they can claim that she shouldn't have custody and there's a few paranoid generals who might put her in jail for having classified materials," Jack added.  "Not to put pressure on you but it's something to think about.  This is dangerous.  The same as going up there for the first year was."

McKay nodded.  "In that case, we'll talk about it tonight."

"Good," Daniel decided.  "Like I said, you guys are more than welcome to use the base."  He smiled.  "And we're not classified so your sister can come down."

"She might enjoy that," he admitted with a small smile.  "Anyway, back to the topic at hand."  Because he desperately wanted to change the topic away from him and Abby.   "We need to know if they can recharge the Zed PM's and how long it'll last for before we plan anything else.  Without it we're stuck.  I know the main problem they saw was a channel that would let power flow into it and finding the right sort of power to send into it.  They have a person who made some sort of theoretical bridge inside a stable wormhole that's not like the ones we use for traveling.  We're not totally sure how he did it and neither is he but it's self-containing so that may help the problems I had on Doranda greatly.  It may take a month or more to find both of those leftover needs."

"We understand that and it's not a problem having you guys here," Daniel promised.  "You're not making a lot of extra work for us and you guys have all stepped in wonderfully, outside of the botanists."

"They're going back to the main base," McKay said dryly.  "They can be of use there until we need them again."  Jack smirked at that.  "They got on even my nerves this time.  I don't care if that little shrub demon does stab me multiple times.  They need real work to do.  The xenobiologists as well.  A few have made themselves useful doing research into demon types, but the rest can go back to base.  Most of my personal team wants to stay?"

"Radek is a good scientist and he's been very helpful to Abby," Daniel assured him.

McKay nodded.  "Good.  I might offer a few to the other projects to go straighten them out."

"Kavanagh has *got* to go," Jack told him.  "I don't care where but he was complaining that the unicorns got to run around loose."

"Digger nearly horned him," John told him.  "Twice yesterday."

"Unicorn injuries from horns don't heal.  Something in the horn kills the cells until there's a huge hole that won't ever heal."

"With the way they wanted to horn him, I hope he's gay then," John said dryly.

"That could kill him but we'll warn him," Jack decided.

"He can gladly go somewhere his mediocre skills are more useful and nag them about unusual situations and solutions.  He did us often enough," McKay said.  "He's the sort that should go for an oversight job.  He'll tell Abby every little thing that goes on in the lab."

"Let him go to school to upgrade his skills," John offered.  He stretched out in his chair to pop his back then sat up again.  "It'll do the project good and if he messes up anything classified by spilling it, he's gone anyway."

"That's not a bad idea either," McKay agreed.  "I've got a few others who would like to go."

"We have agreements with a few universities," Jack promised.  "So it'll be probably nine, ten months before we're fully set back up and ready for the expedition to restart?"

"Yes," McKay and Sheppard said together.

"Plan for a year in case of it taking longer to land or GD to find something," John added.

"I can do that.  That'll give us time to get that next project started better and pick personnel for that.  Your teams would get first option with the other SG teams."  They all nodded at that.  "Okay, any other problem people?"

"I'd like most of the military guys to go back to a base," John said.  "This one is good, but they need military time.  I was fairly lax due to all the stress.  We're even more relaxed here.  Though most of them do not like how hard Dean is on PT, General."

"We can rotate out staff here for extra protection," he decided, looking at Daniel.  "Since we know that there's a huge problem coming later this year?"

"We're also planning on teaching MP's and other military personnel who want to learn more about demons so they can deal with ones who've enlisted," Daniel said.  "It'd be good for you guys because it'd help with xenobiology things later on if you had to recruit."

"It would and let us know who was an idiot before we recruited," Jack said.  "So, start with our senior staff who might have to deal with it and team leaders who're on downtime?  How long do we think it'll take?"

"Two weeks," John said.  "That's how we condensed the stuff we got from Sam Winchester and Thomas.  That gives us an overview, the most common ones we'll run into, some languages' common words to get minimal points across, a slight look into health issues that could come up since a few of them have to drink alcohol for their digestion to work properly, and a good, long lecture on how to figure things out if you run into one you're not sure about."

"Two weeks is reasonable," Jack decided.  "We can take team downtime that way and some of your guys can switch back with that.  For now, if we need to, we can put them on regular teams for a few months."

"That'd be fine.  I have some people I'd recommend for that.  A few are too nuts," he offered dryly, "but most of them can handle negotiations and those things.  I tried to put one person with tact on each team."

"Better than we managed then," Jack said dryly.  He looked at Daniel.  "That good with you guys?"

"That's fine with us.  Is that area finally fixed?"

"Yes.  As of last week the last of it got fixed."

"Good.  Then we can do that."  They nodded.  "Make lists of who's going where, which scientists want to work as opposed to going for some classes, and the soldiers should have the same opportunity."

"I'm all for that, especially in things that could help, like language degrees or classes that will help in survival."

"Cooking," John said bluntly.  "They all need cooking lessons."  Daniel snickered.  "They do."  He stood up.  "I'll pull my guys together this afternoon to go over that stuff."  McKay nodded he would as well and they walked out.

Jack smiled.  "It's like looking at a younger, more sarcastic us some days."

"Atlantis would've driven me nuts," Daniel told him.

"Me too.  You sure you won't send Xander there?"

"Sheppard said he'd quit."

"Never mind.  Caldwell would quit within a week too."  He got up.  "Have fun doing paperwork."

"Not too much to do.  Passing out reports."  Jack walked off shaking his head.  "That's why I have Fargo," he reminded himself.  So he could do crossword puzzles in the other languages he knew.   He had to order some more soon he reminded himself.


John Sheppard looked around the gathered military personnel.  "Ronon, Tiff, we're doing our team separately."  They nodded and left them to their talk.  "People, we have a small update to our situation."  They quit talking and looked at him.  "As of right now, we are waiting on word to see if a project down here can recharge the ZPM's we have or make new ones."  That got a few slow nods.  "We will know within a month.  If they can, we're talking about moving the city.  Until then, we have some time to make some decisions.  Right now, there are three options open to all military staff.

"You can either go back to the main base, where you have the opportunity to sign up for the newest projects or join a team that's going with the old project.  You have the right to stay here and take more training from the Winchesters if you want to leave the service some day and become a watcher or you think it could be of use, which some of it probably can be, or you have the option of going to school and taking some classes.  I will tell you the outside estimate for us restarting our project is about a year.  Earliest is about eight months.  It'll take six of that to simply move the city."

One woman raised her hand.  "So we can go back to the SGC and join a team, train as watchers here to see if it can help us with our usual jobs, or go to school?"

"Basically, yes.  Unless you need to opt in again, then you need to let us know fairly soon so we can gather all the necessary paperwork."  She nodded at that.  "We will know within a month whether or not it can be recharged.  If not, then we're not sure what's going to happen.  We're going on the assumption they can be and we can move the city.  I'm going to hit that one place with the temple later on to talk to them about moving the city there.  They're fairly advanced, in an area the wraith haven't hit that often, and seem fairly nice as neighbors."

"How long do we have to decide, sir?" one asked.

"Give it a week or so.  If we find out we can't move the city then we'll be letting you choose joining the regular SGC or their newest two projects, or going back to the regular military if you're not due to opt out."  They all nodded at that.  "So those are your choices."

"Why is your team talking separately?" one asked.

"Because Ronon doesn't really have the same choices you guys do, or Tiff."  That got a few smiles.  "Also, Teyla's not sure if she'll move with us if we do move.  Her people are there and they're all immune to that virus."  He smiled.  "I can tell you that the science corps are being given the same choices.  Some of them are going back to base so they have something to do again.  Their skills can be of use there.  If not, perhaps Abby will move them to do some research at one of the other areas she lords over."

"McKay?" one asked.  "I don't want to be trapped on a base with him again like we were before we went to Atlantis, sir.  Base lockdowns made him edgy and bouncy, plus pissed as hell."

"That's his choice.  For right now he'll be bouncing back and forth between there and here.  He can do research here and help Abby with some of the projects she's got to use a whip on at Area 51 and NID's labs.  As a matter of fact, he's nominated a few of the scientists to help with that problem so they can do a six-month butt chewing check as she put it."  A few of the guys smiled at that.  "Give us an answer within a week.  If you want to talk about the new projects, find General O'Neill wherever he's hiding and ask him.  Any other questions?"

"Sir, which one are you going to do?"

"I'm not sure yet.  I might decide to do some education stuff or I might stay here and learn some more from the Winchesters.  That may depend on what my team wants since there's the problem of Ronon not being native."  That one nodded at that.  "You'll know where I am.  Don't worry about that."

"The docs?" someone asked.

"Open to research, training, or education as well."

"Carson will be happy if he can visit his mom again," one woman said.

"Probably, yeah.  I know he's at home right now."  He smiled.  "Go think, let me know by Thursday."  They left.  He went to talk to his team, who were having lunch.  He seat down next to Ronon.  "It's going to be up to a year before we can get back.  Six months of that may be moving the city."  Ronon moaned, shaking his head.  "There's a few options open, Ronon, including letting you hit the regular base and going on some of their away missions, staying here, or bringing you to Xander's temple for a while.  That's where we want to move the city if we can.  We'll know that in about a month."  He looked at Tiff.  "The options of education, going to another team on the regular base, or finding a spot in a slayer house down here for the year is open to you as well."

"A year?"

"If we can fly it and land it, it'll be six months of that."

"Damn."  She ate a bite of lunch.  "Ronon, do you have any decisions?"

"I'm not ready to be domesticated like some farm animal or McKay is," he admitted.

"Buffy wouldn't expect it of you, just some visits," Tiff assured him.  "Even if she pouts, she's not real used to having someone *there* all the time to talk to.  She could use it but she's not used to it.  She might even offer to join the project if you two do get serious."

He shook his head.  "She'd hate that.  People watch us so much because we're from there.  It'd be worse than what she gets from you other girls."

"I know that.  I had that revelation a few times over the last year and a bit."  She looked at John.  "Are you going to an away team?"

"I'm not sure yet.  I might hit a college or I might stay here and help out plus learn more from Sam.  I seem to do okay being a watcher."  He looked at her.  "Did we tell you that the wish through the scythe changed things?"  She gave him a confused look, shaking her head slowly.  "You know how you aged out before at twenty-three?  All those older girls got called later in that one event?"  She nodded at that.  "Well, now you have the choice to keep it, that's what that event was.  They're also saying that some of the girls are more than welcome to take Watcher training for the later girls.  Because no one else knows how hard it is."

She considered that.  "That's not a bad thing.  Maybe.  I'm not sure I'm ready for that thought yet.  I'm only eighteen."  She stuffed her mouth again.  "I'd have to finish high school."

"We gave Xander your transcripts and tests.  He's working on that to see where you're at academically this week."  He texted him.

Xander walked in with an envelope, giving her a hug and a kiss on the head.  "We're very proud of you."  He handed it over.  "Nearest college is a few hours away; Dawn's there.  Watch out for stupid boys like the ones who tried to drug her by dropping actual pills into her drink the other night."  He smiled.  "You did good and we're proud.  Let us know what you want to do while you're waiting for your thing to go back up since you wanted to stay."

"I could really join one of the other houses?"

"Vienna has an opening due to an aging out girl.  Cho has one at hers.  Vienna may be changing.  Gwen and Brigit like being slayer SWAT and roaming more than being in one spot.   So maybe some more openings there.  Cleveland has an open spot.  We've got open beds here too."  He looked at her.  "Talk to Wes.  He keeps that list.   He's also the guy you go to when you want to hit college for a few months or so."  He smiled.  "Which I think you can do.  If you could put up with Rodney teaching you Canadian English, you can handle a college."  He tweaked her hair with a wink.  "Figure it out and let us know."


"Very."  He smiled at John.  "It'll go.  We can cover for Ronon if we have to too.  He's close enough to one of us that it's not a problem.  The old Council had things to help with immigration and getting papers for the girls that had to be..." he coughed, "rescued for their own good."  He left them alone.

John looked at Ronon.  "See, an option."

"I would still feel like a farm beast sometimes."

"We could use someone who can spar with us when we're going all out," Tiff pointed out.  "And someone to drill the kids beyond Dean because he has to deal with some actual kids soon."  She opened the envelope, looking inside then sliding the heavy, card-looking, stiff paper folder out.  She opened it and stared.  "Oh, my god.  I sound like Dawn," she said with a grimace.

John snickered but took it to look at.  "Honors," he said with a smile.  "I'm very proud.  You've come a long way since your snap."

"I have," she said, looking at it.  She carefully put it back then went back to eating.   "I don't know what I want."

"Talk to Wes," John said.  "Even if I'm at some college nearer to home, you can do whatever you want and I'll keep in touch."

"I'd rather have someone there who can calm me down when I want to smack the spoiled little freshman brats like tried to drug Dawn apparently.  Would that bother you?"

"No, not in the least.  I'd need that same help."  She smirked at him. "I was never one of the spoiled kids.  Some of them annoy me when we're on the same sidewalk.  Being in class with them would mean I left all the weapons here."

Ronon snickered.  "You are trained to kill them anyway."

"Don't remind me."  He looked at her.  "Talk to Wes first then we'll see.  There's also correspondence classes so you can take them away from the college.  Since you're a civilian contractor you might be able to use ours."

"That might be nice."  She finished her lunch and stole Ronon's bread.  He scowled but she nibbled anyway.  She was probably the only one he wouldn't smack around for that but hey, she was like his little sister.  That's why she couldn't get a boyfriend.  "Ronon, would going around that planet be good for you for a few months if you didn't stay down here?"

"Time runs faster there," he pointed out.

"I remember that from the last trip," John agreed.  "This could all be a moot point if we can't recharge the ZPM's but we've got to make plans in case."

Ronon nodded.  "I would not mind staying down here but I could not be tied down that way."

"Cleveland's a small city," Tiff told him.  "The regular base has away teams; you could go threaten whole new races of people and smart off that they aren't as scary as a wraith."

"Talk to Jack O'Neill, Ronon.  He had Teal'c on his team for years.  He's used to handling that issue."

"I can do that later today.  She will pout, won't she," he asked with a grimace.

"Not as long as you visit now and then," Tiff offered.

"That is more reasonable to me.  I'm not ready to be put on a lead line."  He got up and went to find the general.

"I'll talk to Buffy later," she assured John quietly.  "McKay?"

"Talking with Abby but he can do research here and bounce back and forth if we need him, plus some of his favorite geeks are going to be helping her with checking over the projects under her for now."

"Radek would like that."

"Probably, yeah.  A few are *definitely* going back to base though."

"Maybe the botanists can go find screwable plants somewhere else so they can bring some with them when we go back," she snarked back.

He laughed.  "Possibly, or breed some in the greenhouses."  She smirked and he shook his head.  "So evil," he laughed.

"Now and then.  That's what PMS is for.  Speaking of, Buffy's got it too.  I know she pouted at him last night and he didn't understand."

"I'll talk to him about girl moments later.  I don't think the women in Pegasus have those."  He finished up and went to talk to Ronon.

Tiff took her precious envelope with her to wherever Buffy was.  She found her rewatching the sparring match with her, Faith, and Ronon, so sat beside her.  "Hey."

She glanced at her, pausing the DVD.  "Good news from the family?"

"My diploma," she said quietly.  Buffy smiled and gave her a hug.  "Thanks.  Xander turned in what Rodney taught me for credits."

"It's good for all of us.  You've come a long way, Tiff.  I'm proud you're one of the slayers."

Tiff grinned.  "Thanks, Buffy.  But I came to talk about other stuff."  Buffy nodded, making 'go on' hand motions.  "You know that we're due to go back sometime, right?"

"Yeah," she said slowly.  "Is it soon?  I don't want to see clingy or anything.  I know you don't tie a man like that down unless he asks."

"It's not *real* soon but we're making plans right now.  He might be going back up there for now to make sure the site we want to move the city to will work for us.  Or he might be going back to the main base so he has something to do for the next year.  By the way, John's talking to him about PMS since you confused him last night."

"Oops, didn't mean to."  She shifted.  "Year?"


"That's a long time."

"Yup, and I know you don't want to be clingy and he wouldn't do more than get upset if you pouted at him, mostly because he'd think you're pissed."

"I'm not like that anymore.  Being clingy is high school romance, not later romance."

Tiff smiled.  "Good.  So he's deciding and I told him you'd probably be okay with it if he could visit now and then?"

Buffy blushed.  "He's really heady when he's so close all the time.  I want to sit and sniff him all day long to get high.  Damn if they could bottle that scent women would swoon."

Tiff laughed.  "Yeah, now and then but sometimes he doesn't get a bath for a week either."

"Eww.  I've had those weeks though.  Apocalypses come to mind."  She pushed her hair back off her cheeks.  "I'd be more than happy if he would want to visit now and then."

"Then I'll make sure he knows that."

"I can do that."

"He's with General Jack."

"That's cool."  She got up and walked to the main building, going down to Jack's office.  She heard him down there and walked in, giving him a short hug.  "I'm not going to pout, get clingy, or anything like that.  I wouldn't mind if you wanted to visit every now and then for some fun or stress relief, but I'm not saran wrap girl.  That's very high school and I matured past that.  So you do whatever you want and let me know when you want to have some fun or spar again."  She smiled at Jack.

"And I won't offer to come up.  It's a lot more pressure having everyone in the universe expecting you to be perfect than it is having about a hundred-thirty slayers looking at you the same way."  She kissed Ronon, making him moan.  She winked.  "Whenever you want it, you'll let me know.  Men like you only get tied down when they ask you nicely."  She walked off, feeling good about that decision.  It was mature of her.  Her mother would like it too.

Jack smiled at him.  "If you're on base, you'd get downtime to go to Cleveland."

"She's like the liquor that you drink to forget.  It makes you feel very good at the time, goes to your head and other parts, then leaves you gasping for more or saved in the morning."

"My wife was the same way when we were first together," he assured him.  "That's between you two.  You're probably the most normal and the best guy she's dated."

"And she can beat me.  That's very good," he told him.

"So the normal teams and if we need you to scout a location for the city, you can be sent?"

"I would like that," he decided.  "How much danger is there and do I get more weapons?"

"Depends on where you are and who you piss off, Ronon," he said with a grin.  "We seem to do it a lot.  I can even put you on Cam Mitchell's team.  He took over for me when I hit the desk job.  He's working with Teal'c now so you'll have a fellow alien on your team."

"I might like that."

"Teal'c a hell of a warrior too."

"I would definitely enjoy having more strong warriors around to spar with.  Otherwise I'll get out of practice."

"Good.  I'll talk to Cam tonight."

"That girl thing Sheppard told me about?"

"She might be having it now, or it might be coming, not real sure.  If so, use a condom.  That way you can still have sex but won't get nasty."  Ronon nodded, going to talk to his girlfriend about that.  Jack leaned back, calling his old base.  "Ernie, Jack O'Neill.  I have someone for Mitchell's team.  Ronon Dex.  Yes, from there.  A year probably at the outside as long as we can recharge the ZPM's.  Yup, hell of a warrior, dating a slayer, wants to spar with Teal'c soon.  Likes weapons and trouble if he gets into it."  He smirked.  "Exactly.  He'll fit in very well with SG-1.  I'm here, send him over when he gets back."  He hung up and looked over the openings they had.  Yeah, they had plenty of room for the botanists that were causing problems.  They might not have room for McKay's ego but Abby seemed to be able to let him research in a corner of her lab for now.


Rodney walked into the lab.  "We should talk," he said in her ear, getting a long stare.  "We should."

She finished up what she was doing and took him to her not-often-used office, closing them inside.  "What's up?"

"A few things."  He sat down, pulling her into his lap.  Doing so seemed to send his mind into overdrive.  "We'll know in a month if we can do anything other than evacuate the city."  She nodded, giving him a hug.  "Not what we needed to talk about."  He looked at her, then kissed her.  "It'll be six months to move it if we can."

"I know.  You told me that."

"There were also some other topics pointed out.  Including whether or not I'd be going.  I need to so the city gets fixed if something happens in the middle of the trip."

"Of course you do and I'm not selfish.  You need to do your job like I need to do mine.  We're pulled to it."

He smiled.  "I'm a very lucky man that you understand me, Abigail."  He took another kiss.  "It was pointed out that the trip may be a bit dangerous and that some people would try to bother you if I should die because you'd have my full research files."

She snorted, waving a hand.  "I'll sic Xander on them.  Or Tony."

"There are some generals who might want to take it farther, all the way to saying you had inappropriate custody of classified materials," he said gently, for him.

She smirked.  "So they're pushing you to buy me a ring?"

"Yes they were.  That would solve that problem and let you deal with issues for me while I'm up there again."  He took another kiss, stroking her back.  "I've got to talk to the science corps later on as well."

"We can do that."

He smiled.  "Thank you.  Most of them are not staying here."

"You know I don't mind Radek and the one that won't talk to me because she's scared of me."

"Good."  He smiled.  "They can go check up on the other projects for you as well.  That will save you some aggravation."

"I'm sure Radek could swear very well at them for me if they're doing bad things."

He nodded.  "He does at me when he thinks I am."  He took another kiss.  "I will leave this up to you."

She played with the buttons on his shirt.  "I wanted to add an idea to the table."

"Yours are usually just as brilliant as mine are."  She pinched him on the nipple, making him hiss and tighten up.  "Abigail, not in the labs.  They're still giving me funny looks from the last time we broke in the changing area."

She smirked.  "They expected me to be noisy like Xander and we weren't."  She took another kiss.  "Would you maybe think about storing some sperm?  In case of radiation exposure or something happening that's really horrible and will make me go kill a galaxy in revenge?"

He considered it.  "I can see doing that.  Though I wouldn't want it used without my authority unless I'm gone and you want to carry that piece of me then."

"That's what I was thinking."  She teased his chest.  "Now if you got forensics more and I got more into the harder physics, we could almost be psychic twins."

He poked her on the side away from him making her wiggle because he had hit a ticklish spot.  "That would be too scary and we might really destroy both galaxies."  She giggled, giving him a hug and another kiss.  "I can definitely store some in case of emergency heirs being needed.  Do you have a way to do that?"

"I know a local doctor who specializes in it.  We can talk to him."

"A commercial firm wouldn't sell them off," he agreed.  "I can accept that."  She squealed and hugged him.  He gave her a cuddle.  "Would you like to...."  He trailed off.  "I'm pathetic, I can't even ask properly."  He put her onto the desk and stared into her eyes.  "Would you consider joining minds with me, Abigail?  Becoming my one, only, and ethical muse?"

She smiled.  "I could like being a muse for you to get more brilliant ideas."  He beamed.  She crawled back into his lap.  "This means I've got to invite my parents and you've got to invite your sister."

"Or we could elope, go meet both sets on a short vacation trip," he offered.  "That way they can pout but no one can say much of anything beyond the fact that I'm a bit possessive."  He patted her.  "Are we not wearing panties?" he asked.

"You ripped my last set," she reminded him.  "I haven't been to the mall yet."

He stared at her.  "How naughty you are," he teased.

"I'm very naughty.  I could be more naughty by wearing a skirt but I tried to be good this morning."  He purred in her ear, cuddling her closer.  "Want to help me go panty shopping?"

"I much prefer the effect than seeing all the choices that might make me go blind."  She laughed, poking him again.  He poked her back.  "Radek!" he called, spotting him trying to hurry off.  He was muttering when he opened the door.  "Three things.  Meeting with the science corps later on.  Ours, not her lab's people.  Secondly, you're staying even if they aren't.  That way you can help us with research here and have the peace and quiet plus help her look over the various imbeciles trying to hide their dark deeds at Area 51 and the NID labs."  He looked at her, getting a smile and a nod.  "Third thing, we're going to Las Vegas this weekend.  You, Sheppard, Tiff, Ronon.  That's all that's going with us.  It's a secret, we do not tell anyone.  We'll be going on vacation afterward to visit our families and let them know."

"It's about time," he told Abby.  "It is good you beat manners into him now and then.  It shows in the way he summons us so sweetly."  He looked at him.  "Who else is staying?"

"You, Midori.  Kelly if you have to."  That got a nod.  "The botanists have no choice, they're going back to the SGC base.  Any other annoying ones or who won't keep the secret.  Anyone else has the choice of going back there or going to college.  We'll know in a month but it'll be eight months to a year before we get back.  Some of us will be recalled sooner because we'll hopefully be moving the city so I'll need people who can do that with me if something should break in the middle of it."

Radek nodded.  "I can understand that.  What does one wear to Las Vegas?"

"Clothes," Abby said.  "Though I'm told there's a few clothing optional resorts."

Radek shook his head.  "I'm a modest boy unless I am very drunk.  Should I tell Sheppard and the squealy one?"

"We can do that," Abby promised.  She smiled.  "You and Midori are more than welcome to stay, Radek.  I like you and you're good scientists.  The ones who want to breed vagina plants, not so much."

He laughed.  "True, they are trying.  I'm not so sure one didn't try to molest little George to give him extra fertilizer for growth."

"Did House find poisoned darts there on him too?" Rodney asked.  Radek smirked and nodded.  "No, he can go to the General then go back to base.  Make sure any annoying ones are going back."

"I will gather them and tell them.  The Marines?"

"Have the same options of going back to base, education, or staying here for extra watcher training that could lead to later help in xenobiology issues."

"With what we have seen, demons are nearly nothing," he decided.  "I'll tell them."  He left, making sure her office door was closed behind him.  "Midori, we must talk.  Then the rest of us must talk."  He led her to an unused room to tell her the good news.  She didn't like the botanists either


Jack O'Neill walked into the infirmary.  "How many of the botanists have been stuck by George, Chase?"

"Four since you got here.  Two only on their hands."

"I heard one was trying to molest him?"

"That's one plausible reason we found stickers on his penis," House said from his office.  "Unless he decided to commit suicide by poking himself and then suddenly wizened up about them being poisonous."

"The other one?  And I'll want names," Jack told Chase.  Chase pulled them up in the files.  He took them to look at, grimacing at one.  "Did he sit on George?"

"Not real sure," Chase admitted. "Sheppard got snuck up on."

"Hmm.  We'll be talking to them.  They're going back to the main base."

"Watch your greenhouses in case they find something new to play with," House called.

Jack walked out snickering, going to find those four scientists.  The two with hand injures he could see.  The other two... might need to see a shrink.  They had some semi-decent ones on the SGC base who were used to weird scientists.  He ran into Daniel, handing them over.

"So, he tried to have George screw him instead of the one who tried to screw George?"  He handed them back.  "We'll see if we can recruit you better scientists, Jack.  Before someone somewhere thinks we're all like that.  Then we'd have to send Tony, Dean, and Xander to scare them instead."

"Why Tony?"

"To hold Xander down to minimal scaring tactics."  Jack walked off snickering.  He found Fargo going over forms at the picnic table over lunch.  "Fargo, there's not enough work in this whole base to make you not take a lunch."

"I'm only proofreading for someone."  He handed them over.  "Vacation requests."

He looked at them.  "That's a good sign.  They're going to talk to their families."  He took Fargo's pen and signed off on it.  "Make sure I get a copy and they get one."  He smiled.  "Eat.  You're too skinny and Deputy Lupo tried to threaten me if you lost weight."

"If he doesn't eat, he can escort Philip back to GD with all his new pornography," Wesley offered from his seat.

"Almost no one in Eureka would care about him having it as long as he wasn't showing it to kids."  Fargo finished his lunch and got seconds.  He didn't want Jo to beat up his new boss if he lost weight.  She could be mean when she wanted to.


Tiff walked into the lab, holding up her diploma.  She had been carrying it around all afternoon.  Abby squealed, pouncing her for a hug.  "I'm so proud of you!" she squealed.

Rodney came out of the changing area.  "Are we squealing over a new mouse?"

Tiff bopped him on the arm, letting him see it.  "I got honors because you woke me up at two to take some of the tests," she teased.

He smiled.  "Good job."  He handed it back.  "Excellent work.  Now comes college."

"I'd smite freshmen like they were vampires."

He gave her a pointed look.  "Tough."

"Fine.  John and I have been talking about this since Ronon's going to SG-1 for now."

"With the trouble they get into, he'll have a lot of fun getting into brawls and things."  Abby pinched him on the arm.  "They do!"

"Who's Anise?  I heard Jack saying John suggested they set Xander up with her."

Rodney started to choke and splutter.

"I think he just said the universe will end," Abby said, trying to get him calmed down.  He nodded frantically.  "Tiff, call House?"  He shook his head.  He might be a slight hypochondriac but he hated dealing with House - having to deal with House as a doctor almost made him healthier all on its own.  He had even started to eat better so House wouldn't have to see him about his blood pressure, cholesterol, or any other routine thing.  House came up anyway and gave him some oxygen.  "Thank you, House."

"Did you break baby news?  Because if you did, I bet wrong."

"No!  Tiff just suggested a very bad evil girl for Xander to date.  It'd mean the universe would end without an explosion."

"Bauer's trying to get some of his former coworkers to date him instead," House told her.  "Have I seen you for a checkup yet?" he asked Tiff.

"I went to hit on Chase during it," she said with a happy smile.  "He blushes very well.  How does he feel about virgins?"

"He thinks all you girls are tragically too young for him," he quipped dryly.

"Damn.  I've got to find me a man.  Help, Abby?"

"I don't know too many who'd like someone your age, Tiff.  But I'll ask around."

Rodney moved his oxygen mask.  "Only if Sheppard and Ronon get to threaten him.  They said so."  He put it back.

"They're being overprotective man boobs," Tiff agreed dryly.

Abby gave her a short hug.  "I'm sure you'll find a nice boy who'll growl back at them sometime.  Maybe even another guy like Ronon?"

"Maybe.  Though he's very big.  And tall too.  Buffy said he's very strong too.  She nearly had to use slayer healing to sit last week."  She walked off thinking about it.  "Ronon?" she asked when she ran into him.  "Are there other runners out there?"

"I would assume so.  Why?"

"Think any of them would like a slayer girlfriend?"

He stared at her.  "They're not worthy of you.  You might as well give up that goal."

"It'll be better than hitting on a frat boy if I go to college."

He growled, eyes narrowing.  "You will not be doing that.  You have more sense than that."

She spotted Buffy.  "Won't frat boys hit on me?"

"All the time," she sighed, shaking her head.  "One got me for panty points once.  Be careful if they do.  You don't want to go caveslayer on the beer they'll feed you."

Tiff shrugged.  "I don't mind beer.  I just want a guy."

Buffy shrugged.  "Can't help you there unless you want to go hit on Angel?"


"He's not bad."

"Still eww.  No!"  She walked off shaking her head at that mental image.

"Should she get boys like that we'll have to go beat them."

"All girls flirt and find someone to play with at college, Ronon.  It's a girl thing to do."

He stared at her.  "No, not that one."

She smiled.  "You make a very good big brother.  You even growl like Xander.  Were you possessed too?"

He gave her a dirty look.  "Not that I know of but I am learning how to use his axe."

She giggled and poked him on the stomach.  "You'd look even hotter than he does with it I'm sure.  Maybe for the next apocalypse he'll let you borrow it."  She walked him off to take his mind off of Tiff dating.  "I'm going to the club in town tonight.  Want to make sure I don't look too slutty?"

He stared at her.  "I know nothing about clothes.  I have three outfits."

"I know.  I'm trying to decide between that gray skirt that made you swear and growl or the blue one that made you just growl."

"Both are much too short."

She smirked.  "I can't wear pants.  No one will dance with me.  Unless you want to check out human clubs?"

"I might not mind for a while."  She winked and went up to find real clothes.  John Winchester walked past him, handing him a bag.  "What's this?"

"Clean clothes, Ronon.  Stuff she'll drool on you in.  It'll help when you want to drag her out of teasing in the club.  Faith picked it out for you."

"She'll be teasing?"

"All the girls do.  They learned it from her."  He smirked at the new snarl of sound as Ronon went up there to change their plans for the night.  Buffy yelped and then squealed so apparently it was good for her too.  John went to get a snack and then to find Brenda.  He hadn't seen her most of the day.  He found her curled up on her bed and tucked her in. She needed a nap.  Little Mary needed her rest to drive them nuts later.


Xander wandered into the new headquarters of Angel's office, looking at him.  "I got told to come check on LA since no one's reported anything for over a week," he told Gunn.

"We haven't been quite that slow but only a few vampires," he said, frowning.  "Is it a problem?"

"Unusual.  People are worried that there's a higher being who's planning something and the slow down is part of that."

"Not as far as we've heard.  Why come to LA and not Cleveland?"

"Cleveland barely has any problems.  It's too new.  Even the chaos sorcerers aren't using it yet."

"Huh."  He shrugged.  "Nothing's going on out here.  You can tell Connor we did get all the demonic bugs though."

"He and Morgan have been making the slayer dorm loud along with Buffy and her new semi-boyfriend and Faith and Dean."

"Really?" he asked.

"Cordy showed up to get one of the other slayers to watch the twins when I had them so Crissy could get some sleep too."

"She showed up?" he asked.

"Yeah, decided it was spirit playing day or something.  She and Anya both showed up."  Gunn gave him a look then looked in the cabinet he was leaning next to, coming up with a bottle of water.  "House had John Winchester bless the IV I ended up on the next morning.  But thanks."  He grinned.   Gunn splashed him anyway.  "I could probably use it."  He shrugged, looking at Angel as he came down the stairs.  "Insomnia looked better on Spike."

Angel looked at him.  "Why are you here?  Nothing's going on."

"That's why I'm here.  We haven't had a report in over a week.  Daniel wanted me to check the local sources to see if there's a plot behind this vacation everyone seems to be having."

"Not that I've heard but I can ask around for you.  Did I hear you mention Cordelia?"

"Yeah, she showed up the other night.  Apparently it was a free night for her and Anya.  And then she went to jump Sam Winchester to make his former girlfriend feel better too."

"I splashed him with holy water, no effect," Gunn told him.

"It usually doesn't, even when he's possessed," Angel said.

"John blessed our IV's."

"I guess that's fine.  Go find a spot to hit for the night and I'll call around, Harris."

"Thanks.  Oh, Margaret is nearly babbling mama.  I think she did, so does Connor.  Crissy doesn't because she didn't catch it.  Cordette's going to flip about it.  I got her tape," he said with a smug grin.  "Plus tape of Buffy and Faith fighting with Ronon."

Angel smirked.  "She'll squeal for days.  Go find a hotel."  Xander left, going to find one and his secondary mission for being in town.  Angel looked at Gunn.  "Find out if it's a problem so we have some warning."

"I can start with the usual sources."  He went into the office to do that.  It had been quiet for too long.  Angel went back to his room.  He'd go to the demon bars later.


Xander smiled at the young woman who sat down across from him.  "Jack has a picture of you on his desk."

She gaped.  "He's there?"

"Sometimes.  He said to tell you it's not often, Chloe."

She groaned, shaking her head.  "We wondered."

"He said he leaves because the younger slayers like to pinch too much."  She gave him a dirty look.  "They do!"  He grinned and held up the envelope.  "He sent this for you?"

"Yes."  She took it to look inside.  "Thank you, Agent Harris."

"To those who know me, I'm Xander.  If I like you I'm Xander.  Unless you're an evil bitch and then I'm 'your death is served' according to one of the names some demon clans call me."  She burst out giggling, shaking her head as she got up and walked off.  "He said to call later."

"I can do that."  She went back to the base, looking through the envelope when she got caught in a traffic jam.  It had some good information.  It also had why Jack had wanted Clorina to call him about that guy.  Yeah, he was right up her alley apparently.

Xander looked up from his danish as another woman sat across from him.  "Jack said he was going to write a pretty but very naughty agent who liked guns as much as I do.  Are you her?"

She looked him over.  "You're cute like he said, but I don't see the dangerous."

He held out a hand with a grin.  "Xander Harris, DCIS and ISC."

She moaned, shaking it.  "Very nice to meet you.  I see the dangerous parts now."  He smirked back.  "Come along, little boy, let's see how you rate on *my* scale."

He finished off his danish in a bite, following behind her.  "Like oral sex?  I love to give oral sex."

"That's an automatic bonus in every woman's book."  She took him to her favorite place to play and he was.... better than Jack had led her to believe.  And a bit loud but that was fine too.


Jack hung up and went to talk to Daniel.  "The bad reason for the slow down tried to interrupt the date I set Xander up on," he reported from the doorway.  Daniel put the call he had on hold.  "Unfortunately Clorina had to act instead of him because she had him tied down.  Xander did manage to get free and finished causing carnage and mayhem on the rest of the head demon's army of minions.  Then she took him somewhere more private.  She said he'll be back on Monday.  Something about saving the world sex is even better than apocalypse sex came from him."  He walked off shaking his head.

Daniel took the call off hold.  "You're right, Xander and his date of the moment were involved in that problem LA just had.  They did solve it when the demon army went after them.  I'm told the girl he's with has taken him somewhere more discreet.  I'm sure he's very sorry about that appearing on the news, sir."

"He's dating now?"

"Our arms master set him up with a former coworker."

"I recognized the voice, Daniel.  Which coworker?"

"That wasn't told to me, sir.  I take that back, he said Clorina?"

The president sighed.  "She's a bit wild but a good agent.  She's a lot like Jack too.  You should see if he'll date Jack's daughter to make her come back to the right side."  He hung up.

Daniel went to talk to him.  "The president recognized your voice."

"I figure it's fairly well known by now," he admitted.  "Anything good?"

"He wanted to see if you'd send him syphilis this time for suggesting Xander date your daughter to return her to the side of good.  Since we all know that you had the witches that saved you send him crabs."

Jack considered it.  "She's too whiny for Xander.  I love Kim but he'd spank her first and she'd complain to me.  I'd have to hear all sorts of things I don't want to."  Daniel snickered.  "Maybe I can have Sam beat her into better behavior."

"Sam might," he agreed with a smirk.  "Any other problems?"

"No.  Is he bringing me things to log in?"

"I haven't heard from Xander."  He pulled out his phone to text his that he wanted a report sometime soon.  Then he put his phone back up.  It rang so he pulled it back out.  "She's possessive?"

"A bit now and then."  He looked at the 'he's busy, Monday' text back.  "Yeah, she's a bit possessive.  If I have to I'll have Chloe rescue him or maybe Angel.  It might make him scowl at her and she could learn to like being a vampire.  It'd probably help her on the job."

"That's mean," Daniel chided but he was snickering.  "We'll be missing Abby, Rodney, Radek, Sheppard, and Tiff this weekend."


"Vacation together."

"Ah...."  He considered it then nodded.  "I'll let the pinching twins know that so they can pounce her for details."

"What happens in Vegas," Daniel quipped.

"Tends to get Xander another realm?"

"Possibly."  He walked off happier.  The problems in DC had been solved by Willow's problems.  Abby would be a happy married lab goddess soon.  Gibbs, Tony, and McGee were all going with them.  He had already arranged that.  Buffy was walking his way pouting.  "What happened?"

"I'm a mature woman, I make mature decisions, even if it does suck that he's off saving the universe."

"Want to go to LA?  Xander helped take down a demon army."

She looked at him.  "Led by a woman?  Did they want to date him?"

"I don't know but his date helped him clean it up."

She ate the bite of ice cream on her spoon.  "No thanks.  Boys like him and Ronon need action and explosions.  Xander hasn't had any in longer than Ronon has."  She walked off with the rest of her ice cream.  John Winchester gave her a pointed look.  "I made a good decision even if it does suck at the moment."

"Uh-huh.  Go spar with Faith."

"How's her knee?"

"Bad but she won't admit it."

Buffy went to find Faith in the practice yard, knocking her down from behind.  "Come eat ice cream with me since you're sore again."  She ate another bite.  "I need to commiserate."

Faith got up, dusting herself off.  "That was mean, B."

Buffy grinned.  "John said you're sore."

"How would he know?"

"I saw you limping," John said.  "Help her eat ice cream, Faith."

"Fine.  Whatever!"  She walked off with Buffy.  "Why are you on the ice cream moping diet?"

"Ronon went to help save the world again."

"It was a good choice.  He kept saying settling down was like turning into a cow, or McKay."

"Yeah, you don't tie a guy like that down unless he asks nicely during sex."  Faith laughed, shaking her head as she went to get her own ice cream.  Buffy went to put in a movie so they could lounge around today.

"Why don't they have to practice?" Anna complained.

"If you can kick Ronon's butt, you can skip a day now and then too," Dean shot back.  "Since you can only kick Sammy's butt, you've got a few more  years.  Your free day's tomorrow anyway."  She pouted.  "Tough.  One hour and then you can go clean the barn because it stinks in there."  She sighed but nodded, getting down to it.  She could work faster and then get it done so she had free time.  Finally!  Dean smirked at her.  "You can play in the water when you wash their floor."  She groaned.  "Even Fargo said it smelled like decomp."

"Eww.  It was cleaned last night."

"Then we'll see after you're done.  Where is Mary?"

"With Gibbs."  She pouted.  "Why can't I go jogging?"

"You hate jogging," he reminded her.

"Oh, yeah."  She finished up and Dean lead her back to the barn, letting her open the door.  "It does stink in here and it didn't last night."  She moved in, scanning around.  "Awwww.  Dean!"  He came in.  "Eww."

Dean squatted down to look at the dead K-9 dog.  "Go get Daniel?"  She ran off to do that.  He looked it over.  No obvious wounds, no blood pool.  No one had told him they had one of them missing.  He looked at the two unicorns staring in at him.  "It's a dog, guys.  Are you two okay?"  They ran off.  He frowned.  They were strange sometimes.  Chase came jogging out with Daniel.  "Chill, Chase, it's one of the K-9."

"They came in bleating like someone was sick again."  He looked it over.  "Poison."  Daniel and Dean stared at him.  "It's in the eyes.  Same as it is in humans."  He stood up.  "We can bury it."

"No one reported that one was missing," Daniel said, going to talk to the guard commander.  "Are we missing part of your staff?"

"Not that I know of.  Why?"

"We found a dead K-9 in the barn," he said quietly.

"I have no idea, sir."  He went to look at it, shaking his head.  "He's on night shift.  Let me check on his handler."

"Poisoned," Chase told him.

"Okay, we'll see."  He went to find him in his apartment.  The guards and prison guards had their own buildings so they wouldn't get ignored by the agents.  When the guy didn't answer to knocking he opened it and walked in, sniffing and grimacing.  "What is that stink?"  He walked back to the bedroom, finding him on the bed.  He called over the radio.  "I need Chase in the guards' quarters, fifth floor east."  He hung up and went to check him.  He was alive, but stinking badly like he was already dead.

Chase came in and coughed.  "That's decomp," he said.

"He's alive.  He's got a pulse, doc."

Chase came over to look at him.  "He is.  Do a search of nearby apartments?"

"I can do that."  He let Chase get him back to the infirmary.  This really did suck badly.  He found the stench a few minutes later and it was another night shift guy.  "Found him," he called.  Chase came to look, nodding.  "We think it's the same thing?"

"It's got the same characteristics of the poisoning the dog took.  We'll call someone.  Want to check the others?"

"I think I'd better.  All three of these ones were on night shift last night."  Chase nodded, leaving him alone.  He called in.  "I want each and every single person to check in," he told his second-in-command.  "We've had three die off night shift.  Two humans, one K-9.  Chase thinks poisoned.  Please."  He waited until the local coroner got there.  "Ma'am."

"What happened?"

"Did Doctor Chase tell you anything?"

"Yes, sugar, and I got the dog too.  He served well and he deserves honors."  He relaxed at that.  "You go check the others and I'll be gentle with him.  Give me his file later on so we can make the official calls to his relatives."  He nodded, going to check on the check-in's progress.  She looked at him.  "Poor baby.  You weren't that old.  Not over forty it looks like."  She came over to gather him gently.  He deserved it.  She ran into Horatio outside.  "Poisoned it looks like.  Heavy poison.  It's showing in his eyes."

"How long should it have taken?  They were supposedly on shift last night."

"I'm not sure.  It depends on what it was."  She patted him on the cheek.  "I'll see you later.  Come tell me what's going on and I'll give you reports."  He nodded, letting her do that.  This was not going to be allowed to go on.


Xander strolled into breakfast Monday morning, smiling and happy.  "I'm sorry I missed this weekend but she insisted, boss."

"The president gave you the two days off with pay since you helped save LA and more of them now want to see you fight naked the way you did then."

Xander shrugged.  "She was happy with it.  What do I care if some strange things want to see me naked too."  He sat down in his usual spot.  "Did we have a good weekend, ladies?"

"Nope," Faith said with a smirk.  "We had free time."

"So you had a naughty weekend?" he teased.

"Yeah, whole lots of naughty."  She stared at him.  "Someone did some of the guards," she said more quietly.

He stared at Daniel.  "Anything on my desk, boss?"

"I need a report on the demon army."  He looked over.  "It's handled.  Horatio took that one and made them beg."

"Anything I should hear from it?"

"It wasn't related in the least," Horatio told him calmly.  "They wanted to reduce some of the guards so they could break in."  Xander relaxed again and nodded.  "The viewing's tonight."

"I can do that.  Thank you and let me know if you need more help."  They all nodded.  He went back to his breakfast.  For some reason he was hungry today.

Bauer walked in and looked at Xander.  "You're awake?  She thanked me in a mumble and started to snore ten minutes ago."

"Stamina for sword work?" he said with an impish grin.  "Thank you.  I like her.  Even if she does want to keep it like a casual toy relationship she's very nice."

"When she wants to be.  Now and then she turns into an agent."  He got his own breakfast and went to the armory to check it over.  Clorina might never live this weekend down.  She had almost been....mushy.


To part 48

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