The Incidences of The Blippy Dohickey 4:  Atlantis, We Have A Problem.

Rodney came out of the lab finally at dinner that night, staring at him.  "How do you manage to get into those situations?"

Xander shrugged.  "I don't know.  It's always happened around me."  He got back to work.  "Do you have Armand?"

"Yes."  He put the dragon on the table, keeping it out of Ronon's plate.  "He'll eat you if you eat his food."  Xander shifted his own plate and his baby decided to eat his dinner for him.  "What are you working on?"

"Apparently the ancient chronicle account of the last birth on Atlantis."  He went back to it, letting him see it.

Rodney sat down with a sigh, reading it over.  It was a fascinating account.  John walked in and got them both food trays, putting Rodney's down in front of him.  He ate absently while he read it.  "I can't believe they censured her for having a child herself instead of letting the system handle it," he complained.

"I know, very unfair," Xander agreed.  "I'd have kicked butt."

"She's a woman."

"All the women I know can kick some serious butt."

"She's not like your friend or else she might have."  He finished reading and looked at his plate then at John.  "What did you feed me?"

"It's liver night," he said with a smug look.

Xander nodded.  "If you say so."  He belched.  "Tasted more like moose tail to me."  He belched again, taking an antacid.  "So, any other conclusions that were reached?"

Rodney looked at him over the top of the laptop.  "Yes.  You need to settle down."

"Hey, help me find someone," he said dryly.

"That one...Baxter?"

"Very cuddly.  Very warm too.  Never a cold night, even on the ship."  Rodney just stared.  "What?"

"He was a bit hairy."

"Yeah but so were all his people.  I go by personality, brains, and similarities, not body hair or muscles."

"I can see why," he admitted.  He handed back the laptop.  "Have you gotten anything else on what you're supposed to be doing?"

"Yeah, about half done.  This was in that same search."  He put his laptop back into his bag by his feet.  "Anything else you figured out?"

"You probably shouldn't go home."

"I'm only on for apocalypses and bad things like funerals."  He winced and rubbed his head as the vision hit.  "So *that's* what he had blocked out."  He watched it unfold as he and Landry had a showdown about Joyce's funeral.  Then an apocalypse right afterward and possibly Buffy's funeral.  He took a deep breath, banishing the images.  He pulled out his laptop and wrote out an email to General O'Neill since apparently Landry was going to panic or throw a fit on him.  He put it into the queue for the outgoing mail.  He had a few weeks.

"What was that?" John asked quietly.

Xander looked up, shutting down his computer again.  "Apparently my teacher put something on to block a small gift of foresight."  His dragon was staring at him, head tipped to the side. "Did you know about that?"  It meeped.  He shrugged.  "It's all right."

Rodney stared at him.  "Why did you bring a cellphone up with you?"

Xander stood up, sliding his bag over his shoulder.  "Thank you Goddess for reminding me, McKay."  He dropped a kiss on his head and took his dragon with him back to his room.

"That's unexpected," he decided, unmessing his hair.  Some of the Marines were staring at them.  "I kicked a thought into place.  I'm too smart and not toned enough for his tastes."  They all groaned and went back to eating.

John looked at him.  "So, how did the memory viewing go?"

"I started out at ten years.  When that encompassed barely a few things, I had it go back all the way.  I want to kill his family, sink his whole town after burning down their wretched school, tie his female friends to burning poles to finish the job that the psychically manipulated parents started, and then I want to keep him away from my sister but give him a good portion of your castoffs.  Do you think they'd mind?"

John nodded.  "Probably.  That bad?"

"Yes and you need to give him chair training since he's nearly as strong on that gene sequence as you are."


"He's not a pilot either.  Mitchell didn't see the need to put him in the simulator or Landry."

"Double crap," he muttered.  "I can do that.  Has he found anything you can use yet?"

"Quite a lot of the theory.  The books he leant me are even more strange.  I'm about to see if he could bring us both back there to be taught.  Even knowing what they would expect in return."  He stuffed his mouth again, going to get seconds on the decent things on the line tonight.  Not the liver though.  How disgusting.


Xander paced while he waited for the call to connect.  "Cam, Xander.  It's a problem.  Just shut up and listen for a second."  He paced in the other direction.  "I am on Atlantis.  It's my cellphone, dude.  No, huge ass problem at home and apparently I have a slight gift of foresight.  Well, you can come visit me on a beach in Bermuda after I leave over my might-as-well-be-mother's funeral."  He listened to the groaning.

"So, I'm going to give you a specific message.  Because I can't get Buffy's cellphone and it won't do voicemail right now.  Or Willow's.  Please?  She'll die, Cam.  Take it down verbatim.  It's Xander.  There's a huge ass problem with Joyce's treatment.  She has an aneurysm.  It will blow because her doctor is Glory's host.  I know about Dawn and if I have to, I'll set up somewhere in town for her to hide in.  Get your mother to a specialist outside of Sunnydale ASAP or you'll walk in and find her dead on the couch in about two weeks.  If she argues tell her I had a vision.  Thank you!  You're a life saver, literally.

"Well, yeah, it's enhanced, Cam.  I told you that.  Thank you!"  He hung up and flopped down, heaving a sigh.  Armand was still giving him a funny look.  "What?" he asked finally.  "Not my fault.  It's probably the damn hellmouth's fault."  His dragon slid into his lap, cuddling him.  "Thanks, baby.  We'll get through this.  I know we will," he said quietly, petting him.


 Cam Mitchell came back from his current short mission that night, looking at the general.  "I need a link to Sunnydale now.  Xander called."

"He can do that?"

"Yes, he can, and we're going to have a problem if I don't get this message to them."  He walked off, letting the people take his gun and pack, then letting the doctor look him over before he went to debrief.  He found the phone waiting and no one in there.  "Miss Summers," he said once he undid the hold button.

"Who're you?" Buffy asked.

"I'm Colonel Cam Mitchel.  I'm on the same team as Xander about half the time."

"Did he get hurt?  I'll kill all of you if you got him dead."

"No, he's not hurt.  He said he had a vision."  She moaned a 'no' sound.  "About your mother's cancer."

"Excuse me?" she demanded.  "Why is this important?"

"Let me read off what he told me," he told her, reading her the message.  She choked up at one point.  "He won't be back around this base for about three more weeks."  He let his own feelings wash over him.  He'd been given this news about a friend in the past.  "There's a few very good specialists in LA.  You need to take her tonight."

"I don't know one that would trust a vision."

"Do you have contacts who could find one?  Or even lie and say she's been faint headed and her cancer treatments aren't going as you'd expect, you think she may have missed one because the doctor was a fuck up," he told her.  "Just get her to a real ER.  It's not a painful death but he was nearly crying."

"I...  Yeah, tonight.  Tell him to tell me directly."

"He said yours and Willow's phone wouldn't even do voicemail.  That's why he called mine.  Even if you have to get an underground doc to order the CT, do it somehow."

"I am.  Thank you and tell him I'll think about his offer because this is really bad.  I might need him back."

"I'll tell our general that, Miss Summers.  I know the generals arranged for some of our people to be near you."

"They're neat guys who can't tell me what you guys do."

"It's beyond classified but it's not bad and if I see anyone from that project you guys had to stop I'm beating their asses."

She sniffled.  "Let Riley live.  He's just now married as I found out."

"See if his people can scan her."

"That's an idea.  Thank you!"  She hung up.

Cam hung his head, taking a deep breath as he hung up.  The general walked in.  "Thank you."

"I figured it had to be important."   Cam handed over the message he had taken down.  "Oh, hell."

"He said we could visit him on the beach in Bermuda after you two had a fight about going to his might-as-well-be mother's funeral," he said quietly.

"I have no doubt he would," he decided, sitting down.  He handed back the message.  "How did he call?"

"That cellphone of his.  It wouldn't connect to them but it did to mine for some reason."

"That's good to know.  Why did you have yours?"

"I had it from my hike yesterday.  I never took it out."

"Oh.  That's fine."  He stared at him.  "We need someone to calm the boy down.  He's been acting out."

"That's because Woolsey has not a clue what's going on and he's going to react badly to anyone IOA, plus from his last email Woolsey and someone tried to get into his face about the pet."

"They do have authority over him."

"No they don't.  He's not SG personnel.  He's a civilian conscript."  Landry moaned, shaking his head.  "He's paid out of the subcontractor budget.  I got curious and saw his paycheck the last time, sir.  He's paid out of the same budget Daniel said his used to be paid from.  He may be one of us but he never signed on that way.  He was signed on to do a specific job, to translate things.  Which he's right, he can do from a beach in Bermuda.  Technically, by the paperwork in his office, O'Neill signed him on.  In his contract it stated he was not given a choice, it was here or UNIT, and that he was O'Neill's staff, not SGC.  It's a fine line but especially with those death threats restarting, I doubt he won't pull it on someone like Woolsey.  He's got his head up his ass half the time."

"That is a good point and one I did not know.  Where is that kept?"

"Second desk drawer on the left the last time I knew but he's locked his office so no one can steal it on him."


"Except for the people taking care of his plants."

"I'll get one of them to get it for me," he decided.  "You think he'll react?"

"I think we're all kinda disappointed he has bombed them yet, General.  The thing I'm wondering is why he raised his head that way."  Landry looked confused.  "He sent back the thing, with a note.  He signed his first name.  He should've known someone was going to show up.  Daniel said he was expecting someone like him."

"Then why did he do it?"

"I don't know.  I'm wondering that and I'm wondering if McKay might now know since he did the memory machine."

"I'll ask him."

"Sir, with all respect, don't.  The kid likes you well enough but don't.   Let Sheppard do it if he figures it out.  Or I will when he comes back.  Maybe Daniel.  You and the kid don't really click all that well."

"Is that because I'm keeping him out of the fight simulator?"

"You know, that bugged me all day until I got an email from McKay reminding me he's a strong ATA carrier."  Landry moaned.  "And he could make the chair work, but he's not trained in how to fly things."

"Damn it."

"Yup.  He said he'd prompt Sheppard to give him some tutoring in that area."

"Good.  He's more experienced than anyone but O'Neill.   Did we figure anything else out?"

"Not yet.  I think, if I saw those memories, I might get very close and see the kid as a little brother, which I'm not sure if he'd take or not.  I know Sheppard said he's working outside most of the time up there.   Said he went for a few tethered swims.  The email I got today had a huge sparring time with Ronon.  The kid looked excellent.  I showed it to Teal'c and he was proud.  I think the kid's probably not the sort to have had a decent family.  If his friend's mother was closer than his own....."

"There's probably a problem in his family.  His background check showed an uncle who has an astounding number of DUI's."  He leaned back.  "Anything else you've picked up?"

"Yeah, I think he needs someone to settle him down but I don't know who it could be.  I honestly don't.  The kid's very open.  I wouldn't be surprised if he had slept with some aliens if his blipping time encountered anything off world."

"All right," he decided.  "I'm going to send a message that I want to talk to McKay about any results he got from the boy's DNA scan.  That extra taint bothers me."

"Apparently the mermaid taint wasn't as fully dissolved as they thought," he said.  "We still need to set the kid a permanent team.  I like having him but trouble likes him more than it does Jackson.  He's better equipped to get himself free.  He's better able to handle combat.  That may be the reason he popped his head up."

"He's got battle fatigue."

"He did seem to have the 'oh, not again' thing going on."

"I can see that.  Let me talk to McKay.  I'll see if he and Woolsey made peace yet."

"I can understand that.  See if McKay can figure out how his laptop has sixty terrabytes on it running windows."

"It does?"


"I can do that too if he can not destroy it."  He went to send that message and send the data burst early.

Cam went to shower, change, and calm down so he could think.  He had to get Xander a good, supportive team sometime soon.  Someone who could keep up with him and someone who could calm him down when he got upset.  Because he had no doubt the boy was wearing off some stress on Atlantis right now.


Buffy hung up and looked at her mother.  "That was one of Xander's teammates, Mom.  We need to get you to another doctor.  Xander had a vision.  Willow, her doc, the cute one, is Glory's host."  She called Riley's phone.  "It's Buffy, I need a huge ass favor, Sam.  No, Xander had a vision."  In the background she heard Riley choking.  "He saw Mom's doc is Glory's host, Riley.  That he's possibly missed something important on purpose and if we don't, I'm going lose it when I come home in a few weeks and she's dead.  Please?"  She relaxed.  "At home.  Thank you."  She hung up.  "C'mon."

"Buffy," her mother said.

"I don't care!  You're not dying!"  She pulled her mother to her feet.  "Dawn, hospital trip!" she called.

"Already?"  She came bouncing down the stairs.  "Bad news?"

"Way bad news.  Mom's doc is the host."  She walked her mom out to their car.  Dawn got in.  Willow had the house well in hand for them.  She drove them to where Riley's people were staying, being very careful.  She wouldn't hit any demons on the way there, even if they were evil.  She saw Glory and sneered.  "She'll be mine soon."  She sped up when she spotted Tara.  "In, now.  She's hunting."  She got in and they sped off.  Riley met them at the car.  "I'm a wreck."  She got into the back, squeezing between Dawn and Tara.

"I'll be back, Sam."

"Sure.  I hope they figure it out.  We'll be planning how to capture him."

"She's hunting down on eighth," Buffy called.

"Good deal, Summers.  Thank you.  I hope she'll be okay."  She watched Riley drive her off to see the nearest medic.  She hated this town.  She liked some of the people in it, she respected Buffy and them, but she hated this town.  "Gear up," she ordered.  "We're stalking."  They grabbed things, tossing her the stuff she needed.  They went to find the insane one.  She was draining someone.  They tracked her back.  One of her team took that victim to the ER.  They tracked her back to her lair and set up surveillance.  This was the break they needed to stop this apocalypse.  When she changed back, they got it camera.  They knew who to capture now.  They had a concrete vault with her name on it.  It was airproof and no one would ever have this problem again.


Xander got out of the water, finding John staring at him.  "Sorry."

"No, it's cool.  What's up?"

"The vision was my near-mother's death and then an apocalypse."

"Shit."  He patted him on the shoulder.  "That's going to upset you.  You should have a tether."

"They bit it in half.  They were trying to free the bait."

John shook his head.  "Okay.  That makes a scary bit of sense.  Rodney and I have been called back to talk about the IOA issue.  Did you get any new threats?"

"Yeah, on my laptop."

"Rodney has it."


"To see how you modified it.  He's not taking it apart, just scanning it.  He does it to his own often enough."  Xander relaxed.  "Can't get replacement parts?"

"No.  It's not exactly standard issue.  Even when it was made."

"That kinda sucks.   We'll make sure he doesn't hurt it.  C'mon."  Xander wiped some of the water off himself as they walked inside.  "Want to change?"

"No.  I'll shower before I go to bed."

"Where's Armand?"

"Probably in Ronon's hair.  He walked off as soon as I dove in."

"That's fine.  I can check on that."  He gave him a sideways look as they walked.  "I took tape of that sparring match.  Mitchell's email tonight said he was proud and so was Teal'c."



"Cool."  He smiled.

"Why pop up?  Cam figured out you didn't have to."

Xander looked at him.  "Did you watch that?"

"Some of it."

"What was I doing before I got that?"

"Nightly patrols....  Battle fatigue," he sighed.

"I don't mind now and then but not every night, bitchy friends who never gave a bit of a damn it seemed like, and all that.  It was that, Anya, them, the Council's threat of taking us out, the demons thinking I'm a big ass prize.  There's betting pools about which one was going to take me out and if it'd be turned, kept as a toy or concubine, or just killed.  The betting on me being turned because one of the team had handed me over to stop an apocalypse was nearing ten mil."  John shuddered.  "I just... couldn't.  Then the wristband fell in my lap.  Almost literally.  It was an accident to activate it, but it was... it was almost like it was freeing.  I had people who gave a damn about *me* and what I thought and did and looked like.  No nagging, no bitching, no whining about PMS.  Someone who respected me for what I could do and had been doing all along."

"So when you got back, you decided you couldn't handle them knowing the truth because they wouldn't care," he said quietly.  Xander nodded.  He stopped the kid, turning to look at him.  "It's not exactly the same but the base is a family in a lot of ways.  Dysfunctional, egos exploding all over the place,  the threats about every two weeks, all of it."

"It's not bad.  Not the same but not bad.  Maybe in a few years I can slip off and find someone really there for me.  I need a pack of my own."

"I get that," he agreed.  "I have a pretty impressive one here myself."  He gave him a shoulder squeeze.  "You're cold."

"No I'm not."

"You are to the touch."

"Eh, I don't care.  I'm not chilly.  Thanks."

"Welcome.   Starting over is a good answer to the problems you had.  From what I saw I would've paddled them both back in high school."

"Don't tempt me to go back and do it to them," he said dryly.  John smirked, shaking his head.  "I know, paradox but it won't be."  He walked on, going to the labs.  "I hear you have my electronic baby?"

"I do.  When did she come from?"

"The thirty-something century."

"That figures."  He handed it back.  "Your other one is helping Ronon meditate."

"He's good at that."  He smoothed a hand over it.  "Going to talk about me?"

"About which program you're going to end up at," John agreed.  "Because if you're staying, Lorne's getting you."  Xander blushed, but shrugged.  "Not that way probably.  I'm not going to say a word as long as it's mutual though."  Xander beamed.  "Go shower and go to bed."

"Yes, sir."  He went to do that.

John looked at him.  "You done?"

"Yes."  He packed up what he needed and walked out with him, going to the midway station and then from there to the SGC.   They came down the ramp and McKay shook the general's hand.  Then John did after saluting.  "You needed to confer?"

"I did.  Let's go to my office."  He led them that way.  O'Neill was in there.  "When did you get in?"

"About twenty ago.  I came to see if the kid was going to make it home for the apocalypse.  Our guys there said one was coming heavy."

"He called," John told him.  "McKay prompted a thought about that special cellphone of his.  I heard him talking to Mitchell."

"Good.  Hopefully it'll be stopped then."  He leaned against the wall.  "What did we find out?"

"Is he outside the IOA's control?" Rodney asked.  O'Neill nodded.

"You're sure?" Landry asked.  Jack nodded again.  "You did it on purpose?"

"Yeah.  I knew the kid would destroy them.  The simple background check led back to the contract Travers had on his life.  Which he's upped through his lackeys by the way."

"Woolsey decided the kid had a point," John admitted.  "Though he hates the idea of a conscript."

"I have him put in the same way I put in political refugees that work for us.  That way no one from anywhere has any hold over them."

"I didn't even consider any defectors we had working here," Landry admitted.

"There's about eight total.  Mostly in the sciences.  One on the diplomatic staff."  He looked at the other two, then Mitchell and Daniel walked in.  "Morning," he said dryly.  "Crashing the party?"

"Sure am," Daniel said dryly.  "Because it's going to take all of us to find him a team on either project."

"I can tell you that he does have battle fatigue," John said.  "I can tell you that half of it was because of what was going on at home with his friends."  Daniel snorted at that.  "I saw your meeting."

"I wanted my zat," he admitted quietly.  He sat down.  "So?  Anything good?"

"Six things," Rodney admitted, handing him the memory tape.  "He's been both backward and forward.  Mostly by accident.  He was aiming for home but never quite got there.  He had a lot of sex I went past very quickly.  The Empire of Xander was nearly done but Octavian was a wise man who decided Rome was more important even if Xander did have good ideas.  He implemented them and gave himself credit.

"Xander shrugged it off but he was hurt.  Then again, he was a concubine to protect himself.  There were a few others there who saw him as a major threat to the timeline and other problems.  He had no idea who they were at the time.  When they finally caught up to him he told them what had happened and they told him how to get home, which he overshot by about twenty-eight centuries."  Jack moaned, shaking his head.  "He slowly zeroed in.  That gou'ald was prettier back then than his last meeting."  He shifted.  "Secondly, Xander is not exactly fragile but he's looking for a home.  Insane dragon who likes liver, Ronon's hair, and all."

"He can make one on either base," Landry assured him.

"No, he can't.  A lot of the people on the base view him as 'he's a bit strange'," John told him.  "Especially after that sparring session.  It blew some Marines minds that a geek could beat most of their asses, Generals.  Lorne and I both pointed out it was so he could rescue himself when his team failed to in the future.  They sulked but knew it'd happen because we're human and they're not sure he's not an Ancient sometimes."

"Well, he did sleep with two," Rodney admitted dryly.  "Merlin was one."  Daniel leaned forward, covering his face with his hands.  "You knew?"

"I briefly had Merlin's memories in my head; I thought I recognized the boy when I saw him.  I wasn't sure why."  He looked at them.  "Who was the other?"

"I can't tell you."  He smirked.  "It's intensely personal and nearly drove her insane.  Though, he did spot Vala somehow."  Cam stiffened.  "She didn't appear to notice him and he didn't realize who she was.  No one told him?"

"No, I didn't even think about it!" Cam complained.  "That side trip the idiots took him on?"


"We're going back there later then," he decided.  "The trail can't be that cold.  It was only two weeks ago."  Daniel gave him a shoulder squeeze.  "Any other good news?"

"Well, his weapons proficiencies are above standard for our design team but I would expect that," Rodney said.  "He cannot learn a thing by lecture.  Showing him how to do it and making him learn it that way works, though if he's bored you have a shot in hell."

"I've seen that," Cam said dryly.  "Where does the tracking skills come from?"

"Back when he was possessed by a hyena.  Now and then his eyes will glow because of it," John said.  "I saw that part and nearly flinched.  Green glow, not yellow."

"Wonderful," Cam said sarcastically.

"He never fully sheds any possessions.  Keep him away from repositories or he might keep it," Rodney warned.  "He did the former holder of the temporal jump band.  It changed his brain chemistry but not that much."  He looked at Landry again.  "I do want to ask permission to see if he can recreate it and take me to that pre-Furling society, even knowing what they would expect to teach me.  I can grunt and bear it to get the new math down and their sciences."

"I'll consider it," Jack told him.  "They might not be able to spare you for that long, McKay."

"I could be back within an hour of when I left."

"We'll see," he repeated.  Rodney grimaced but nodded.  "Next point?"

"The boy's mind is fairly scary.  He's got a switch that says 'someone has to do it'."

"He also has the last step of battle rage," John said quietly.  "That showed up during the sparring session.  He called it quits when he was about to reach for it."

"Have I seen that?" Landry asked.

"I have," Cam admitted.  "I can pull it up, General."  He nodded, letting him have his keyboard to get into the email and put it on the bigger screen.  They all watched in silence.

"He has an aggression problem," Jack said.

"Not surprising since his parents made me want lye soap for my brain," Rodney said.  "Plus to sink his town with a huge explosion.  He nearly managed it during the hellmouth battle during his graduation.  He considered adding other sites to the explosion but decided against it."  He shifted.  "That brings me to my next point.  The boy will think tactically and then consider the emotional impact."  He ran it back to a situation and they all groaned.  "They knew he had to be stopped.  No, Xander didn't like him very much, but he knew it was necessary.  Later that night he drank himself nearly into a coma.  Thankfully he has drunks for parents so his tolerance was higher than the fifth of jack he shoplifted."

"I think that one and the looking for the home problem will be solved together," John said.  "I honestly think if we could get him a good team, one that was supportive the way my team is or SG-1 is, it'd be helped.  Maybe not stopped, but it'd help him when he had to think tactically and it'd help when he had those days when he's growling and ready to blow shit up."

"I saw that one day," Daniel admitted.  "I got him out of the mountain before something activated from it.  We went to the park and he hit the swingset."

"That and water seems to be where he goes to think.  I found him swimming earlier tonight.  The merpeople we have around us apparently decided to untie their brethren they felt was bait."  Landry moaned, shaking his head.

"The fourth issue," Rodney said, "is that his self esteem has apparently never shown up outside of what he can do, and then someone discounted him again and again and again."

"Which could be helped by having a good team around him," Cam pointed out.

"Far in the future.  It even happened a few times during his trips.  He saved most of an army from an ambush by attacking someone and breaking their cover.  Guess who got yelled at," John told him.

"When?" Jack asked.

"Fighting against the Moorish army.  He had a wife then.  She basically came onto him, got knocked up on purpose, and he married her to help her out.  He saw her and her child die of old age before he managed to make himself move on.  She died childless due to a fever," John said.

"The original owner of the wristband had the same thing," Rodney admitted.  "He'd take one and last as long as he could, then lose them and start to hide from life.  He's presently hiding," he admitted.

"I met him.  He's still growling that the kid told him to treat his boyfriend better and respect him more, because life was pain or else you were already dead," Jack said.  He considered it.  "How many?"

"Seven spouses," Rodney sighed.  "Only the one child though.  He wasn't sure how since Doctor Keller's scans do say that he is indeed infertile due to the DNA corruption from his town's energy leak.  Are you sure we can't bomb it?"

"Not totally," Jack admitted.  "I've listened to the former soldiers who moved there on my suggestion.  They want to and one has a plan on how to do it."

"So does the kid," John told him.  "Using the conveniently placed sewer system that was never meant to carry anything."

"I heard about that."  Jack smirked.  "That was about theirs too."

Cam coughed.   "The kid does have his violent moments.  Do we have any idea how to handle those?"

"Spar," John said.  "Let him pick a way to wear out the frustration that seems to cause them.  If it's a case of he's flipped the switch to warrior geek, let him go with minimal orders.  He's got a decent mind for tactics."

"That showed up in that battle at graduation," Rodney said, running that scene.  They watched and Daniel whimpered.

"I think the blowing up part is every teenager's dream," Cam said finally.  "But that's horrifying and a nightmare.  Did he calm down afterward okay?"

"Drunk off his ass and got nearly killed by his parents for it.  Then he left for a roadtrip," John said.  "Where he got drunk and ended up stripping.  That Jack guy's memories really did loosen his inhibitions a lot.  I think the old Xander would've probably broken and snapped sometime soon instead of bending one last time.  Or he would've ended up walking away until he realized that he had to so less people died.  So he'd die in their place."

Cam nodded.  "We've been attacked and I saw that 'oh well maybe it's today' look."

"That's the battle fatigue," John agreed.  "He really does need people who can keep up with him.  I won't offer Major Lorne, Generals.  I think he and Lorne would be scary and brother-like within weeks but I think they'd develop the wrong sort of closeness.  The sort that keeps you up at night when your little brother is in trouble."

"I can understand that.  Though the last one we liked decided to become a priest," Landry said dryly.

"You need more of the commando mindset than you do the more rigid military one," Cam said.

John nodded.  "Definitely.  He's used to small, covert group with not a whole lot of structure.  It was very much a 'this is your job and this is mine' thing with their team.  He's also hiding a lot behind the smartass.  That seems to have been going on for years though."

"So we put him with a very wild team?" Landry asked.  "One that gets into trouble anyway?"

"Put him somewhere some of his skills are needed and he's not overlapping too much.  Some teams have someone who can plan, do explosives, those things.  It leaves him feeling left out and like he's tagging along again," John said.  "Lorne figured that out when we took him on a trial mission to some friendly natives we trade with.  They had a good rapport, they had the greater majority of the bases covered on the team.  He hung back and had to be pulled into the discussions."

Cam nodded.  "I've seen that when I have both him and Daniel with me," he agreed.  "He could probably lead but I don't think he wants that sort of responsibility.  He will question decisions.  He has mine in the past.  Including why we were walking down a hill instead of taking the stairs."  Daniel stifled a snicker at that.  "We had a chain of command talk down that hill," he finished dryly.

"So a team that can spring ideas and the leader will go 'yeah, I like that one' even if it's not his," Jack said.  They all nodded.   "What was the sixth point, McKay?"

"The kid's going to have some adjustment issues.  He's physically twenty-one.  He's lived through about seventy centuries of time."  They shuddered.  "Half of that time he spent protecting himself on his back or in a battle.  He feels he should be better but really he's probably as good as he can be without learning new methods of fighting.  He's had to censor himself a few times from giving advice that was outside this century."

"What's his medical skills like?" Daniel asked.

"We're behind enemy lines, and I've been shot," John said bluntly.  "He can pull it, pad it, seal it, and help evacuate.  He's not up to surgery but if we taught him you never know.  He's not a quick study sometimes but he'll pick things up."

"I caught many signs of a learning disability that his deplorable excuse for an institution of learning never cared to see.  He's mildly dyslexic.  He's greatly annoyed at book learning because it doesn't leave him more than bored.  He's learned weapons, construction, and sexual intrigue in a more practical manner so it's all stuck to him.  I would encourage him to quit dating women since each one is worse than the last."

"I kinda felt for Anya," Cam admitted.

"So did he.  That's why he nearly married her," John told him.

"Each one has basically taken a little bit more of the young man from him.  Earlier Xander was a lot more happy and carefree.  Even in his first year of fighting," Rodney told them.  "Then the girls started on their thing.  Then the girlfriends started on theirs.  It got to the point where he was losing himself.  If he had been able to finish that roadtrip, it probably would've been better for him.  Unfortunately his car broke down and he ended up stripping."

"That's a thought that might make many of his ex's very happy," John said blandly.  "Though most of them treated him like the good puppy he was.  I'm wondering if he made it home with some of the stuff he got from them."

"We've seen some things in his office," Jack offered.

"Yes, I wanted to see his office," McKay said dryly.  "And have him explain the totally irrational thing that is magic."  Cameron snickered.  "Plus he asked that I get something off his desk for him.  Apparently he left a favorite dagger."

"You can do that," O'Neill agreed.  "Get the passcard from Botany."  They nodded.  "Watch out for the tentacle plant and the smoking one."

"I can definitely keep him from them," John said.  "We have enough of those in Pegasus."

"They're nice plants once they like you," Daniel offered.

"Still, it's best to stay away from anything with tentacles.  Including his ex," he said when she faded in.  "Yes, Miss Chase?  Did you have something pertinent to the discussion to unload on us?"

She stared at him.  "He told you about me?"

"That and I saw you," he said blandly.  "Why?"

"Don't give Xander the dagger.  He has seven with him."

John shifted.  "He and I are going somewhere tomorrow with Ronon."

She gaped.  "How dumb are you?  You're taking him places?"

"He's actually very skilled," Rodney said.  She snorted.  "Clearly you didn't see the boy for who he was."

"I saw plenty of who he was."

"Really?  Before and after his trip?"  She growled.  He smirked.  "Because we all see him as very skilled, very necessary, and very well liked even if he did kiss my hair once."  She huffed and left.  "Can we block ascended beings from him?"

"No," Jack said.  "We can't block ascended from the base."

"I don't think I had tentacles," Daniel said.  Cam gave him an odd look.  "She did!"

"I don't remembering seeing any," Jack admitted dryly.  "But that's a whole 'nother topic, Danny."  He looked at his colonels.  "Who do we think would be good on his team?"

"Someone like Thomas," Cam said.  "That same sort of strength yet openness, but his team's full and complete.  Plus he hates the kid for being a smartass."

"If you're putting a scientist on his team you either need to give him someone who can talk back, like I get," John said dryly, glaring at McKay, "or someone like Zalenka that he'll end up plotting with to drive everyone nuts."

"Fieldgrass," Daniel said.

"If they can get along.  He seemed a bit...wishy washy," Rodney said.  "Easily run over.  Even Radek did it."

"But, I've seen him start to stand up for himself and Xander encourage him to beat the Marine that was picking on his hair over the head with a bat," Daniel told him.  "David nearly did it."

"A bit stronger and he's not cleared for field duty," Cam said.  "Maybe Camera but she hates him for flirting.  They can work well together though."

"He's got a botany bent," Daniel reminded him.  "You need someone in the hard sciences, someone he can talk to about rewiring things with them and the like since he knows a little bit of electronics."

"Which comes back to Perick," Rodney said dryly.  "Though I doubt they get along."

"No they don't," Daniel agreed  "He said something snide to the boy about being bi and we nearly had to peel him off the wall after Xander went evil on him.  We still have not filled in the gouges his nails put in the metal walls," Landry said.  "Speaking of, would you like him back, Doctor McKay?"

"I'm going to drown him.  He keeps picking on Miko and Radek.  They're the only two competent people I have."  He snapped his fingers.  "Jindry."

"Not coming back," O'Neill said.  "He went home to be a father."

"Which Xander might like," John said.  "It'd give him someone else to hover and be an uncle for."

"He's a single father now.  He knows it's dangerous.  That's why he retired.  Though....  McKay, Paulsberg?"

"Rachel or Antony?" he asked.  "She might try to turn him into her submissive."

"Antony's got some self esteem and suicidal issues from his sister," Cam said.  "I've asked Xander to keep an eye on him for us, told him that we were worried about the guy.  He snarled at her a few times when she tried to interrupt.  She laughed once but he did the same thing he did to Perick and she spent the night curled up in a corner crying.  Antony yelled at him but he got him calmed down with some ice cream.  He's a lot stronger.  I'd trust Antony to start making his own decisions again."  He crossed his feet and linked his hands on his stomach.  "We need someone more like you were when you were younger, General.  That 'I'm in charge' sometimes but also that 'we're screwed, and you have ideas' thing too."

"Feretti loves the boy," Jack said.  "Just for being him."

"Yeah but he can't stand him on the team," Daniel said.  "The last time they went anywhere together was that place we didn't know had a temple to Aphrodite."

Jack moaned.  "Don't remind me, please."

"I heard the beer was very good," Cam said dryly.  "Who's got a lieutenant colonel spot that could be moved up?"

"Scalen," John said. "He's getting antsy with his team leader."

"Perkins," Rodney said with a grimace.  "Though not for this.  I'd put him with a group of amazons and make them train him."

"He is down on women in the military," John agreed.  "I was going to ask to send him to those amazon Jaffa's world to be trained."

Cam snickered.  "Istha would kick his ass."

"Good.  He could use it.  Also, I think Xander did him good kicking him around in sparring practice the other day after he said gay men were like women and should be treated the same way."  Jack smirked at him.  "It solved that problem fairly quickly.  Send him to help Buffy, sir."

"That's mean."


Landry snickered, making that note.  "I might send some people to help.  I know she said Captain Finn was back out there."

"Fuckhead," John muttered.  "Is he more human now, sir?"

"Barely, apparently recently married," Cam said.  "I did a slight check on him when I talked to Buffy earlier."  They all smiled at that.  "His cellphone reached mine."

"I want that plan," Rodney said dryly.  "Think I could reach my sister's phone?"

"No clue."

"I'll have to test that then."  He made that note for himself.  "Plus figure out if the shrinking and space spells he uses can be adapted scientifically."

"You'd be scary if you could do magic, Rodney.  Please don't," Daniel said.

McKay just smirked at him.  "You'd be amazed at what I'd do."

"Probably and then the whole world that might beg you to be their God King would sacrifice you."

"Well, possibly.  My luck on such things seems to have worsened since I got to the Pegasus galaxy."

"I still want to see Xander go after the Genii," John said dryly.  "By the way, we tested that vine on a wraith hive ship.  It works very well and the vine will grow in space.  It took three days to erode the ship so much it started to fall apart.  Then we burned the sucker before some other ship accidentally ran into it.  Can we have the other samples if we can put them in airproof vaults?"

"Definitely," Landry agreed.  "We're keeping some for that very reason.  How long before it took over the ship?"

"An hour and a half but it was a small hive.  About the size of Manhattan.  We beamed it to the air vent like he thought would be best.  Very unseen and it'd spread all over.  It did. Only one pod managed to get free and we shot it down."

"Sweet," Jack said.  "We needed those when we were taking down mother ships."

"Now we'll let Xander be pouted at by them when they want to use him to take over," Daniel said.  "Cam, did we run into Ba'al with him?"

"Yes and the first thing he tried to do was to pinch Xander.   Xander turned, slapped him, then went off on him in Egyptian.  Ba'al backed up and let out a few subtle whines then huffed off like he had been insulted.  Apparently Xander called him a sheep fucker among other things."  John burst out laughing.  "The kid has a mouth on him."  He snapped his fingers.  "Scalen and that new guy."

"Scalen I like," Landry said.  "He's a bit rough around the edges but getting a team settled in will help.  I'll talk to him about the boy.  The new guy?  Which one?"


"Oh, him."  He rolled his eyes.  "Dickenson."

"Bald guy with the thick neck?" Jack asked, looking confused.  Cam nodded.  "He won't let the kid play and he hates geeks."

"Scalen I like for the team," Landry decided.  "Fisher for the scientist?  He's diplomatic.  He's a bit bouncy and hyper himself.  He's got experience with Xander in the mess.  They've played poker a few times, though I don't want to know why Xander was teaching him the rules of kitten poker.  He's not going to react to anything too strange."

"I like him," Daniel agreed.  "He's mostly calm.  People like him when he shows up as part of a team.  I'd also suggest Tilla for their other soldier.  He's used to female warriors with Buffy so she won't have to kick him around to retrain him to let her do things.  He'll be able to deal with her 'I'm a woman, get over it' thing that she's had to pull on some of the Marines."

"He's stuck up for her in the past," Cam agreed.  "Isn't Scalen a Major?"

"Yes, but he's seen real combat," Jack said.  "We stole him from Afghanistan and black ops.  Make sure he's not Initiative."

"No, he's not.  He was sneering at someone who was exposed as one," Landry said, looking at him.  "He's a good leader though.  Very calm, very used to a broad range of personalities.  Tilla's good at that too."  He looked at Mitchell.  "That wouldn't overlap too much with him."

"No.  It wouldn't.  She's a fairly tough Marine.  He's a fairly tough Marine.  Fisher's diplomatic.  Xander would be the only one with bomb, medical, linguistics, and electronics knowledge."

"If not, he could be used to train them into a team," John offered.  "Even if they wouldn't mesh well later on."

"Good point," Jack agreed.  "What about a fifth member?"

"I think they might pick one up like you did, sir.  I don't know why I think that," Cam admitted.  "We picked up Vala.  You guys picked up Teal'c.  They picked up Ronon and Teyla.  Sometime they make the best additions."

"Good idea," he agreed.  "Let's get those people here," he decided.  "Tilla's got a little sister in the program, right?" he asked.  Cam nodded.  "Is she a soldier or scientist?"

"Soldier," Daniel said.

"Think she'd want to go to Atlantis for training?  You guys have almost no female soldiers."

"I can handle that," John agreed.  "Teyla would like having other tough women to spar with."

"Good."  Landry told his assistant to get them to his office.  Once they were all gathered he looked at them.  "We are forming a new team.  Scalen, team 25 is yours.  It's you, Fisher, Harris, and the older Tilla.  The younger is going home to Atlantis because they have very few female soldiers and could use some."  She smiled and nodded at that.

Her sister looked at her.  "Make sure they don't give you shit or you give it back."

"Teyla needs more female warriors around her," John told her with a smile.  "She'll welcome her openly."

"Good.  I like that.  Harris, as in super geek Harris, Generals?"  They smirked and nodded.  "Well, this'll be interesting."

Scalen shook his head slowly.  "I'd hate to give up my chance to command a team, Generals, but I don't like the kid.  He's bouncy, he's violent, and I don't understand him."

"Try it out," Jack ordered.  "God knows Carter and I didn't always get along because I don't do science myself."

"I can try, sir, but a lot of the time I want to put Harris in a corner and make him sit and watch."

"Harris has had extensive training and combat," John told him.  "That time he spent blipped, a good quarter of it was in a war."

"Yes, Colonel, that's why I want him to sit in a corner."

"Having you on his team would let him go more toward geek," Landry told him.  "He'd be able to protect himself but not *have* to as often because you and Tilla are both very good at that.  It'd let him fall to a backup status."

"I fully agree with the concept, sir, but I've watched Harris.  I don't think I could get along with him.  Even though I'd trust him in the field I think he's probably going to have a few problems and I can't relate to that point yet.  Unlike the general when he came in already being battle fatigued, I'm not at that point yet.  I can't ... I can't really connect to him on that level to put it bluntly."

"That's a good point to worry about," Jack agreed.

"Though I am doing paperwork to see if I can transfer to Atlantis myself."

"You and Tilla, the younger one, can be put on the same team?" John asked.  He nodded, smiling at that.  "We can do that.  Tilla, suggest someone.  We've run out of ideas."

"Henry Miller-Thomas."

They stared at her.  "He's insane," Cam reminded her.

"Which Harris might get.  And if he doesn't work out, then it's bye bye for him, right?"  Landry nodded.  "He could settle down.  Personally I'd trust Harris to give us more tactics than him."

"We'd like him to be the backup for the military matters," Jack reminded her.  "Fisher, any ideas of your own?"

"No, sir, and I like Harris a lot.  I can easily work with him.  Plus her.  I don't mind female soldiers in the least and we all know I'm not one of the disrespectful ones or she'll turn me into an ogre pretzel."

She nodded.  "Yes I would."  Scalen laughed at that.  "Thomas Perish?"

"Idiot," Cam muttered.  "I have no idea how he became Air Force with his lack of brains."

"He tests well probably," John said.  "I know he got extra points for being an eagle scout."  He sat up suddenly.  "We need a junior you, General."

"Not old enough.  But otherwise, yeah, I can see the mini me on his team some day.  He'd probably scarily get where Harris is coming from."

"It'll be like us the next generation," Daniel said dryly.

"I'll tell him you said that."  He looked at them.  "He's got another year before he can join up.  Or we'd have to fudge paperwork."

"Start him training with the team now so they get used to him," Cam suggested.  "It'd help him a lot."

"Yes it would.  I'll talk to him later."  He looked at Scalen.  "You have a name for us."


Daniel shuddered.  "That's going to be explosive.  He's like McKay's mouth and brain meets Conan."

"Which Harris might like," he pointed out.  "He's tough, he's a smartass too.  They both get drawn to dangerous women.  And if they don't work out, by then the younger O'Neill will be ready, right?"

Jack nodded.  "Probably, yeah."  He looked at the female member.  "Well?"

"I can kick his ass."

"Good."  Landry got him in there.  "New duty assignment Major Kissen."

"Yes, sir," he said, smiling at him.  "Where are you sending me this time, sir?"

"Team 25," Landry said.  "Team leader for Harris, Tilla, Fisher, and eventually Jon Tyler-O'Neill."

Kissen, who was a tall, bald guy with light colored eyebrows and almost strangely blue eyes gaped.  He looked overjoyed.  "I get Harris?  Really?"

"Really," Jack agreed.  "We'll try it.  You'll be training on Atlantis for the next two weeks.  Anyone have any troubles going now?"  Fisher raised his hand.  "How long to clear it up?"

"Two hours, sir.  I have to feed his plants too."

"I wanted to see them," Rodney said, standing up.  "Let's do that."  They left.

"The rest of you, pack," Landry ordered.  "I'll cut orders."  They saluted and left.  "Sheppard, standard evaluation then I'll hand them to Mitchell to make sure they're good together."

"I can do that, General.  Not a problem.  There's a younger Athosian that wants to help like Teyla does on a team.  I can try him with the new group as well."

"That'll work," he agreed.  "Anything else that needs to be discussed?"

"Not yet, sir," John admitted.  "I'll let you know and keep you updated on missions, Mitchell."

"That's fine.  See if Ronon's willing to teach him a new form."

"They're very cute.  Oh, Armand *loves* his dreadlocks.  Thinks they're the neatest thing.  He crawled over to bat, nudge, and play with them the first time and every chance he gets he does it again.  Also, we found out what happened with the beam and his stomach.  No wood before the trip."  They all nodded at that.  "So now we know."  He stood up.  "Let me check out his office too if I may?"

"Dismissed," Landry said.  They saluted and walked that way.  He looked at Jack.  "That's  a crazy and insane team."

"Which Harris will fit right in with," he pointed out.  "Let me tell the mini me."  He walked off happier.  Jon had wanted to get back sooner but his age was a problem.  He found him at his apartment and thankfully not on a date.  Jon opened the door when he knocked.  "You ready for orders?"

"I have some?"

"Yeah."  He walked in and looked at his young clone.  "You're going on Harris' team once he gets back.  You'll start training with him soon enough as the backup grunt.  The team leader is Kissen."

"Oooh," he said with a shudder.

"He likes Harris.  Harris is an anomaly.  He was...given a temporal device a few months back."

"Oh, god, no," he moaned.  "A quantum mirror thing?"

"No.  Had to bounce back and forth until he made it home.  He's physically twenty one."

"So, a lot like I am."

Jack nodded.  "Quite alike.  We're expecting it to be like me and Danny between you two.  He's even a linguist and super geek."

"Runs at trouble?"

"He doesn't have to, it wants to sleep with him.  He's got battle fatigue so he's the backup on his team, no matter what, but he's got tactical thought.  I'll get you his dossier this week.  Mitchell's been making sure he could handle it in the field.   Right now we're sending his team to Atlantis to train."

"I can go."

"No you can't.  You're not eighteen yet.  The president would throw a fit."

"Yay," he said dryly.  "Anything else I should know?"

"Harris lifted his head by giving the temporal band back."  Tyler moaned.  "We don't blame him for that.  He's basically conscripted so no IOA oversight on him."

"I get that.  Because of the battle fatigue?"

"No, his former teammates weren't really appreciating him.  It's an odd situation and I want you to talk to the boy."  He considered it.  "Pack.  You can go talk to him, get used to him, and then start training after you hit eighteen."

"Sure."  He did that while Jack told Landry to wait on sending them back.


Jon came out of the stargate last and looked around.  "Jeez, could it get brighter up here?" he complained, putting on sunglasses.

"After the dimness of the mountain, it's very bright," John said with a smile.  "We're even on the ocean.  Woolsey, get Teyla please and Harris."  He walked them up to his office.  "Lorne, this is Team 25 and two extras, plus their future member."

"Morning," he said.  "Coffee?"  He pointed at the pot and disposable cups.

"Blessed mother of god," Kissen moaned, getting himself some.

Xander walked in, staring at them.  "Did I screw up?" he asked.

"No.  Morticia had another sore," McKay told him.  "Fisher released it so she's fine."

"I don't know why she's getting those."

"I do, chicken bones," he said with a smile.

"I'll remember that.  No bones for them.  Hi, Tilla.  Kissen.  What's up?"

"This is your new team, Xander.  You're now Team 25.  Technically SG-25 but you guys will be bounced back and forth now and then," John said.  "Kissen is your team leader, with Tilla and Fischer with you.  You'll get Tyler once he hits eighteen."

Xander looked at him then grinned.  "You're Jack's clone.  Sam and Daniel told me about you."

"I am."  He shook his hand.  "Jack said you're my version of Danny."  Xander beamed at that.

"Lorne, get the team rooms near Xander.  The other two are starting a new team.  Teyla, I want your helper to go on their team for now," he told her.  "This is Scalen and Tilla's junior sister.  She's a Master Sergeant.  He's a Major."

"I can tell him that and introduce them.  If you'll come with me I can do that now."

Lorne found them rooms and handed over the forms.  "That's theirs."  She smiled and nodded, taking them down to the gym.  He found other ones.  "Here we go.  Rooms on the same hallway.  Xander, Armand was in the mess the last I knew."  He smiled.  "Playing with Ronon's hair again."  He rolled his eyes at that.

"We'll be picking out some missions for you guys tonight," John ordered.  "Go get some rest since it was early on the main base or get to know each other better."  They left.  Xander hung back.  "What?" he asked more quietly.

"What if I totally fuck this up and we never mesh?" he asked quietly.

"Teams are built, not instant, kid.  You build that rapport.  They're supposed to be at your back the same way you are theirs.  Like the team you had before you blipped, only nicer and more supportive."

Rodney snorted.  "Do not get me started on my urge to burn them at the stake," he complained.

Xander looked at him.  "Why?"

"Because friends should do that, Xander," Lorne said.  "That's the purpose of having real friends."  The kid looked confused.  "It'll go.  Trust me.  You and O'Neill get along so you'll get along with his clone.  Kissen is a caffeine addict so you guys can bond over Mountain Dew.  Tilla's a lot like a nicer version of Buffy."

"I've met them all before."

"Now they're your team," John told him.  "It'll be okay.  I promise.  It took us six hours to figure out who to sit you with."  He smiled.  "Go get your dragon and show him off.  Tyler's never seen him."  Xander nodded, going to save Ronon's hair.  He looked at Lorne, then at McKay.  "Ditto."  He smirked back.  "Anything explode while we were gone?"

"No, not yet."

"I half expected to get to Midway and not be able to dial in," McKay sighed.  "Because that's the way our luck has ran recently."

"I swear I'm going to ask Xander to go evil on the Genii."  Lorne cackled at that, shaking his head.  "What?  He needs the exercise."  He walked off to get himself something to eat and look over how the new teams were integrating.


Tyler looked up as Xander flopped down in the middle of the balcony that was off their hallway.  He stared at the thing in his arms.  "What is that?"

"This is Armand.  He's my baby dragon."  He held him up.  "This is Jon Tyler, Armand."  The dragon sniffed then gave Xander a funny look.  "I know, he smells like Jack.  He's made that way."  The dragon meeped at him, letting Jon pet him.

"He's cute."

Xander smiled.  "When he wants to be."  Kissen came out with a large cup of coffee.  "I brought soda and I travel with caffeine pills."

"Good idea," Kissen promised.  "We both need it, kid.  Relax."

Tilla came out with a danish, sitting down as well.  "Hi, Armand."  He meeped at her and let Jon go back to his rightful worship.  "Has he had many problems?"

"Not since the upset tummy from the beaming cleared up."

"McKay said no more trees," Jon told him.

"That's cool.  I can remember that.  He has no problem with gating."

"Even better."  He sat down and the dragon crawled over and onto his head, settling in for a nap.  He looked up.  "You're a heavy hat, dragon."

"Here, move against the railing.  He's been seeking sunlight."  Jon shifted over to sit next to them.  Armand sighed in pleasure and got onto the railing to stretch out and bask.  "He has a heat lamp in my office."

"I saw that," Kissen agreed.  "So, what have you been up to up here?"

"Mostly just translating, though I did spar with Ronon.  He's really good."

"You're excellent at it," Jon told him.  "We saw the sparring video while we waited at Midway for the quarantine time."


"Yeah.  I could never, older or younger, go that long with Teal'c.  I'm told you tie with him sometimes.  That's consider amazing."


Tilla smiled.  "Got a message from your home as well.   Cam called to check since we were coming this way.  Buffy did get her to one of Finn's medical contacts."  Xander relaxed.  "Sam Finn, Riley's new wife, got Glory's host in a cage and is sinking her."  Xander beamed and fully relaxed.  "So no apocalypse, they found the aneurysm, and she's been gotten to a very good doctor.  Also, Landry said that he knew it was important and yes, if something bad happened, you could go.  He knew you'd panic and fight if it was sprung on him and he tried to have time to think for a second."  Xander leaned against her shoulder.  She patted him on the head.  "There, all fixed?"  He nodded, smiling slightly.  "Good boy."  He purred like his dragon did.  "Get off me if you're going to do that.  You might make me want to have lofty goals, like setting up an empire for you to warp."  He laughed, kissing her on the cheek.  "Ewww."  She gave him a mild shove but she was smiling.  "Hugging I don't mind, kissing is for boyfriends and you're too butch for my tastes, kiddo."

"Sure, I get that," he agreed.

"Don't even think about it," Kissen ordered.  "I like my girlfriend, Harris."

Fischer smiled.  "You can flirt with me but I can't promise to flirt back."

Jon smiled.  "I don't mind flirting either but not my thing most of the time.  But if you need to lighten things up, go ahead."

Xander beamed.  "Wow.  They picked really well."

"Yup," Jon agreed.  "We definitely tried."  The dragon nibbled on his hair so he looked up.  "What?"  The dragon purred and stretched out once Jon had his head back.  "Oh, you needed a footrest.  No wonder you like me."

Ronon walked out.  "Xander, can I borrow the beast and see if he'll eat stupid people?"

"Ooooh, can I have the stupid person?" he asked.

"Gladly.  He's making my brain hurt worse than McKay when he's going off on string physics."

"Yeah, I don't get that either," he admitted, standing up.  "Be right back, guys."  He bounced off beside him.  "They think I fight pretty well."

"You are an excellent warrior who has seen twenty too many battles.  That's why they gave you warriors to let you backup," he agreed.  Xander beamed at that.  "That way you can be smart, quip, and draw the rest of the bad girls in the universe."  He pointed.  "Him."

Xander walked over to him.  "Hi."  The man sneered.  "Ronon wanted me to spar with you."

"You're one of the geek corps, right?"

"Linguist actually.  Not scientist."  He beamed.  "He said I need work."

"You should before we take you off base," he sneered.  "Otherwise you're a danger to your team."  Xander went to the sticks.  "I doubt you can use those yet."

"Okay.  They seemed to be the majority weapon trained in up here."  He stood his ground.  "Here good?"

"There's fine, kid."  He walked over, gauging how he was standing.  He attacked.  Within a second he found himself on his ass, staring at the kid in shock.  "How did you do that?"

"I don't know.  Wanna go again?"  He beamed at him.  The guy grumbled something and got up.  He attacked faster this time.  He also went father when Xander kicked him.  "What's wrong?" Xander asked.  "Are you okay?  Did I hurt you?"  He moved closer.  One of the guy's buddies attacked and Xander kicked him around too.  And the other two that came over to help.

Ronon watched, nodding.  "He's a very good warrior."

Jon and John walked in.  Sheppard shook his head.  "Idiots?" he asked Ronon.

"They made my brain hurt.  Xander, that's enough.  They're going to be going on missions soon."

Xander pouted.  "Fine.  They won't play with me anyway."  He pouted at Jon.  "Can you spar?"

"I'm rebuilding that skill."


"Tilla spars," John said with a smile.  The boy bounced out to talk to her with Jon behind him.

"He is like a hyper version of Danny," Jon realized.

McKay walked past them.  "Everyone else thinks that he's like a cross between O'Neill and Sheppard, but who got a brain download from Jackson."

"That's a bad mental picture.  Thank you very much for it," he said sarcastically.  Xander giggled, smiling at them.

"Caffeine, Xander, no more bouncing," Sheppard called after him.  The people in the hall and the nearby gym all shuddered.

"I'm fine.  I had coffee."  He sat down again on their balcony.  Jon sat under the dragon. Who purred at him for it.  "Idiots be broken in."

"Good job," Tilla said.  One of the airmen carried out a thermos and two more cups, walking off.  A few more brought offerings of caffeine too.  She was highly amused.  "You were bouncy, weren't you?" she asked dryly.

"Yeah, he was," Jon agreed.  Xander beamed, adding some sugar to his coffee and letting Kissen have some more then letting the other two fight over the other cup.  He knew Fischer hated coffee.

Woolsey came out, staring at them.  "Meeting?" he asked.

"These are my new team," Xander said with a smile.

"Wonderful.  Can they keep you from beating up on the Marines?"

"Ronon asked."

"I heard.  Please be more gentle with them.  They have missions today."

"I'll try."

"That's all I ask."  He walked off.  Things had been clarified for him.  He almost felt sorry for the kid being a conscript but the new team might help him a lot.

Evan came out.  "Sheppard said you guys who aren't tired are going with the team going today.  They've been known to trade with the Genii and we're worried there might be trouble," he said, looking at Xander.  "He said you can be as mean, wicked, and evil to them as you want if they start it."  Xander nodded at that.  "Any of your team that's not too tired can go with you but we know they're resetting their biological clocks."

"I can go," Jon said with a small shrug.  "Strictly as an observer of course."

Kissen looked at him.  "Don't pull anything too heroic or SG-1-ish.  Am I clear?"  Jon nodded.  "Good.  The Genii are pains in their asses from the mission briefings I got given when they thought about sending me up before.  Then I broke my ankle."

"That's fine.  Gou'ald level?"

"Militant amish," Lorne said. "They want weapons.  There's a splinter group that's basically very militant.  They've kidnaped people in the past.  Xander, if they know you have the ATA gene, you're in danger for that."  Xander nodded.  "The people you're going to see are pretty friendly.  We've traded with them since our first year.  Please don't upset that," he begged the kids.

"I won't," Xander said.  "Are we going to see Milacan?"

"No.  Kovel."

"I heard about them.  It's cool."

"Good.  While there, you're going to be allowed to ask to see if you can check out the old outpost.  They don't hold it as holy or anything but they do want to scavenge it.  We agreed we'd trade with them for anything useful they found.  You know the list of needs and wants, plus what would make McKay dance the Snoopy dance in the middle of the mess hall."  He smirked.  "If you can do that, I'll get it on film for you."

"Sure, if I find a ZPM, I'll watch and time it very well."

"Good.  You guys leave in two hours.  Tyler, you can borrow gear from our armory."  He walked off, leaving them to decide who was going.

"I can go," Fischer said.  "I'm usually on night shift anyway."

"I'm beat," Tilla admitted.

Kissen nodded.  "I'm about to crash too.  Behave, kids.   We'll see you tonight at dinner?"  They nodded and went to put on gear to go with the team.  He looked at the dragon.  "Xander's going through the gateway."  He hopped down and ran off to help his daddy get into trouble.  "I like the dragon.  He makes a good teammate."

"He does," she agreed.  "He's a good diplomatic envoy too because most everyone wants to pet him."  She stood up.  "I'm off for bed."

"Night."  He gathered up things to put back, keeping the coffee thermos.  Then he went to bed too.


Xander and Jon walked in that night, staring at Rodney.  He put down a ZPM.  "It's very little," he admitted.  "Their cloning chamber for herbal stuff and trees isn't that complicated.   We made them apple trees and a few citrus trees but reminded them you were allergic.  John, the Genii people said hi.  One went crying when he tried to pounce the tree making stuff."

"I didn't know Armand could grow," Jon said dryly.

"He's not supposed to, it makes him ravenous for days."  He walked off shaking his head.  "It's all good and they love us because we made them trees they could eat from.  It'll run on a generator if they want us to do it again."

"They wanted to give Xander two kids too," Jon told Sheppard dryly.  "Not his kids, they kinda looked more like kin of Ronon's by skin tone and hair, but they wanted him to be their stepparent.  He promised he'd be an uncle while he was around."  He walked off.  He seriously needed a shower.

Sheppard nodded.  "Yeah, that team'll work."  McKay was petting the quarter-level ZPM.

To Part 5

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