The Incidences of The Blippy Dohickey 2: A Week of Reveals.
John looked down from the bridge of his ship. It was *his* ship. Rodney had named it after him. He was still smug about that.
"Quit smirking," Rodney complained from his seat. "Or I'll rename it after Miko."
"Fine." He turned on the comm system. "Stargate Command, this is Colonel John Sheppard requesting I be joined by Colonel Ellis and General O'Neill." He let the button go. Rodney had made sure the whole ship could be run from the bridge in the least complicated way possible.
"Sheppard, is that you in that ship?" Ellis demanded.
"Yes, Colonel Ellis," he said dryly. "Beam on over. Our shields are down for you and O'Neill."
"I'm coming. Give me ten to get him. Ellis out." He hung up. He sounded a bit grumpy so this was going to be a pleasant showing off.
John hung up and settled himself into the command chair. It was like the chair at Ever. It had a backup, independent power supply in case something happened to the main one. Two bright lights appeared in front of him. "Welcome to the John Sheppard," he greeted with a grin.
"Ever had ships?" Jack asked casually.
"No, I built them," Rodney said, staring at him. "She's the finest blend I've made so far."
"Them?" Ellis demanded.
John smirked and nodded. "There's two more back on Ever's planet waiting to launch." He got up. "This is, of course, the bridge area. It's set up for a minimal crew to run it. A lot of the functions can be monitored and worked on from the chair." He let Jack sit in it. It tipped, hummed a bit as it accepted him. "You have to individually code each person into it. We coded O'Neill so he can try it out."
Ellis stared at him. "How did this ship get built since you were on Atlantis yesterday, Sheppard? And what is Ever?"
"Ever is the city the pacifist Ancients built for themselves so they could hide," Rodney said, closing his laptop to look at him. "She's a beautiful city."
"Let me guess, Harris found her?" Ellis said dryly.
"Yup," John agreed. "And he's not in contract either," he said smugly.
"Is there a gate there?" Jack asked as he sat up. He stood up, looking at them. "I'm damn impressed, Rodney. The weapons are listed as inactive?"
"Eterna does not like fighting on her. She allows the weapons in case we're attacked but for no other reason," John said. "Including the ones we built on the city for her."
"I understand that," Jack said. He looked at him. "Where are they? And you're about to need to reup too, Sheppard."
"We'll see, sir. I'm thinking."
"I know I need to," Rodney assured him. "Which means the trio does as well?" Jack nodded. Rodney smirked. "Well, I suppose Xander can claim Ever's planet for his own then."
"No. They didn't want one. It might bring stress and danger that they'd have to hide from," Rodney said. He pointed. "Miko, what are you studying?"
"The Colonel's ship is leaking a fluid; I'm hacking her shields to stop it," she said absently. "I have not had to hack in a while so I'm not as fast."
Ellis called over to have them find it and stop it. "Thank you, Doctor." He looked at them. "Anything else you guys want to stun us with?"
"Lighten up, Ellis. Sheppard and all the Atlantis people took a day off to go make us this pretty new, powerful ship. How long did it take you to get here?"
"Half a day," Rodney said. Ellis gaped. Rodney smirked. "We have a new atmospheric and sub-light year ship as well." He walked him down to the flight deck. "The one with the wide wings was her native ones for moon trips. It's not meant to go far outside the atmosphere. That one does not fully work. Why give them such a great gift and expect them to understand it without working for it?" He walked over to one, patting it. "This is Major Lorne's new fighter jet and this one is Colonel Sheppard's version of the X-302." He pointed at the last one. "Xander won that in a poker game on a marketplace against one of his ex's. He said the stuff inside is still his but we can all study it."
Ellis moaned. "Wow." He came to look at them. "Like the jumpers, McKay?"
"Yes." He looked at Jack. "We'll talk about my recompense for all this wonder."
"Yes we will," Jack assured him, clapping him on the back. "Thank you, boys. Anything I should hear?"
"Xander's created a doorway to Ever," John said. "The three joined before the Doctor came to get us."
"Joined? Like...married?" Jack asked.
"Complete with mystical tattoos and fantastic sex," Rodney said with a smirk. "It was quite heartening."
John nodded. "It was." He grinned. "We got so relaxed, Rodney didn't even yell at people."
"Wow." He looked at the ships again. "I want to test pilot them, Sheppard."
"Yes, sir. We can do that later." John smirked. "You can see why we called for you instead of Landry."
"I've noticed he's gotten fairly political recently," he said quietly.
"Oh, more than. He kept Xander off Nila while they were working out his contract," Rodney said with an evil smirk. "It gave him time to go through his things."
"I heard that part from Nila. We thought it was the president."
"No, not hardly," John said. He leaned against the glider. "We'd prefer not to turn these over to General Landry, sir. We trust you implicitly, but Landry was Area 51. He's never been through the gate. He's never been in a battle that I know about."
O'Neill nodded. "UNIT will want to look at them too. They have our other ones. I saw a picture that had Harkness?"
"The Doctor took them home."
"Wonderful." He smiled. He looked at Rodney's shirt. "What did you spill on yourself?"
He looked then scratched at the spot on his shirt. "The Doctor's new son threw up on me for my gentle cradling when he had a nightmare," he said dryly.
"Did he adopt?" Jack guessed.
"No, Xander has a quilt that will get anyone pregnant," John said dryly, grinning again. "His last birthday present of Jack and Ianto.... well, he's adorable. Hardly ever fusses and thinks Xander's the best thing in the universe since Dawn lactating to feed him for the Doctor." He pulled out his phone to show him a picture. "That's the little future Doctor."
Jack smiled. "He's adorable."
"He's horrible," Rodney corrected. "He sees me and gets sick."
"How did Harris make a quilt that got men pregnant?" Ellis asked.
"Magic," all three said in unison.
"Though there is still that machine on Atlantis," Rodney offered. Ellis shook his head quickly. He looked at Jack. "We had a wonderful vacation, sir."
"Full of the whole city. Plus beer." He called. "Miko, send us a beer each please?" They appeared in a flash of light. "Thank you." He hung up and handed them out. "We made this from the native grains there. They had something that equated to hops."
Jack sniffed it then drank some, nodding. "Bit sweet," he admitted. "No aftertaste from the hops. Damn good though."
Ellis sipped and nodded. "A bit like mead but beer. Interesting." He walked off sipping. "Let's see the rest of this, McKay. How many staff is it meant for?"
"A-hundred-sixty," he said, following him.
John looked at Jack. "We're deadly worried about what Landry might want to use us for, sir," he said quietly. "Especially Xander."
"I agree," he assured him. "I'll work on it. Would you guys give it to UNIT?"
"Probably. We have to retrieve the other two."
"Can we use the doorway at Xander's and fly them back?"
"Yeah. You'll need someone to play engineer and a flight officer at the least."
"I can do that. Give Jon the other one." He patted him on the shoulder. "You look better and happier."
"I am. Even if there wasn't any women outside of Miko and Dawn there." He shrugged. "Half the time we ran around naked, we played in the sun. Ever has some bad winter storms and a few tornados a year but it's a full city." They walked off together, him turning off the lights. "We worked well together."
"Good." He finished his beer, tossing it into a hole with a trash symbol on it. He saw the light and looked down inside. "Recycling?"
"Yeah, Xander worked out a Star Trek like replication system." He rolled his eyes. "You can't make food but you can make simple things like pens, paper, that stuff so far."
"That's something we'd like to reward him for." They walked in, finding Ellis looking over the cafeteria and kitchen. "How much did you guys leave there?"
"The whole herd of cows minus three cows and a male calf," Rodney said. "We have sixty cows left?" he asked John, who nodded. "Plus the other meat and milk beasts Xander found off-world at markets."
"How did you get cows?"
"They're not human cows but they are cows. It looks like a gou'ald took them and it spread to another place's market, sir," John said.
"Interesting. They any good?" Rodney got into the freezer and tossed over a steak. It was shrink wrapped, frozen, and looked fresh. "How long ago?"
"Ever has a stasis based freezer system. Anything picked or butchered was frozen immediately. That was done before we left."
Jack nodded, putting it into his pocket for now. "I'll have it with one of the new beers later," he joked.
Ellis held his earpiece. "Belay that, Lieutenant. General O'Neill and I are both over here. This is Sheppard, McKay, and Kusangi returning. Yes, you can tell UNIT. No, Landry can't come aboard yet. O'Neill said so." He looked at him, getting a nod. "Because they're showing off and O'Neill is negotiating for them to give them to us," he said dryly. "Yup, exactly, Lieutenant. Yes, I'm here. Kitchen actually." He hung up and they walked on. Looking in rooms, the gym, all that. They made it back to the bridge and found a frozen person in a beam. "Tried to beam in without permission?" he guessed. Miko looked up and nodded. "Is our leak fixed, Doctor?"
"Quite. I am watching BBC News."
Jack looked at him. "Hank, next time, take orders," Jack told him. "Unfreeze him please." General Landry was unfrozen. "Thank you, Miko. Very nice work."
"It's automatic, sir."
"Even better." He looked at his minion with a smile. "Welcome to the John Sheppard."
"How did they do this?"
"Ever had their ship still there," Rodney said. "We learned much from it." He smirked. "We're in negotiations for what we want to hand her and her sisters over."
"You're under contract," Landry said.
"Not unless you forged my signature. Mine ran out a week before Xander's did."
Landry groaned. "Damn it."
"Basically," Jack agreed. "By the way, they're back too." He looked at the three Atlantians, smirking at them. "Want to see the President?"
"Hell no," John said. "I hate politics."
"Ditto," Miko said from her seat.
"Definitely seconded," McKay said. "Only John is American really. Among all the settlers there, only he and Evan are American." John looked at him. "Dawn's only half and Harkness isn't fully American, I think he took Welsh or UK citizenship papers."
"Good point," Jack agreed. He looked at John. "UNIT?"
"They'll need to be read into the space ship part too, sir."
"Granted. Miko, can you beam the head of UNIT and Martha Jones up here?"
She turned to the ship's computer, putting that in. "General Thorne and Martha Jones," she said, finding them and beaming them aboard.
"Welcome to the John Sheppard," Rodney said with an evil smirk.
Martha looked around then at him. "This is bloody brilliant, Doctor McKay." John showed her the picture. "Aww, you have a son?"
"No, he's Doc's son." She stared at him. "Xander has a special quilt that can make anyone who has sex on it pregnant." She cackled, punching him on the arm. "He's a sweet baby who pukes on Rodney."
"Aww." She smiled at him. "They do the same thing to me."
"Dawn started to lactate for some reason so he got fed properly."
"Even more cute," she promised with a smile.
"General Thorne," Jack said with a nod.
"General O'Neill, Landry." He nodded back. "Does this new one mean we can bum one of the older ships?"
"We're going to be talking about that," Jack said. The other general smirked back. "Come see." He walked them off to show them around.
Ellis sighed, holding his comm earpiece. "Lieutenant, what is so pressing?" He listened. "Let me check. O'Neill, the president wants up."
"No," John said. "His guards will freak out. They don't like him in space."
"He's a political asskisser who hates Xander for finding he was snaked," Rodney said bluntly.
"So the kid showed his ass like usual and the president hated it because Harris treated him like the last guy?" Ellis guessed. They nodded. "Huh. Yeah, he can come later, after we take custody of her."
"If," Rodney reminded him.
Ellis stared at him. "You've been SG for a long time."
"Yes, but I do have my desires."
"I heard. I agree." He shrugged. "I don't want it."
"Ditto," John said. Miko shuddered. He grinned at her. "I'd never move off Atlantis, Miko. You know that."
"I know." The generals came back. "The president wanted up but we told him no because we are in space."
"Good," Jack agreed. He looked at the two from UNIT, who were grinning. "I'm sure he'll visit soon."
"Probably, yeah." She looked around. "Can I go back to my office to think about space smut while nagging for baby pictures, Miko?"
"Of course, Doctor Jones." She sent her back. She smiled. "Sirs?"
"In a minute," Jack ordered. He looked at Landry. "We have to negotiate so I'll tell you later on how it's going."
"Why?" Landry asked. "He clearly is going to give it to us."
Rodney snorted. "No, I can keep it for my own. There's no law saying I can't own my own space battle cruiser."
Landry stared at him. "Are you planning on resigning?"
"I don't know yet. That depends on what my next contract might say. The same as the rest of ours would." He smiled and sent him back to his office to swear in peace. "I won't gouge the budget too badly," he told Jack.
Ellis chuckled. "I'm sure you won't, McKay. The other two?"
"I'll get one and the mini me will get the other," Jack told him with a smile. "Let's go back down, kids. Atlantis will allow you back." They all nodded and went to DC to talk about things. The president was huffy but admired their balls for their short list of demands. He could agree with some of them. Even if it would weaken his hold over the SGC. There was always the budget.
Xander looked up from his cooking when Jack walked into the house through the Atlantis doorway. "Hey, Jack. Guys, O'Neill is here," he called. They came out of the bedroom to greet him.
Jack smiled. "You all look tanned, fit, and comfortable." He shook their hands. "I have new contracts, as discussed by McKay. He put us over a barrel. Evan, you're getting a rank raise to Colonel. Sheppard got one as well." He handed over that paperwork. "We'll do it in front of your city in a few days."
"Thank you, sir."
"You did a good job and we should've when you got back, Lorne." He clapped him on the arm. "Doctor Zelenka, your designs blew us all away. Rodney gave you full credit for your ideas and some flack for some coding he hated but otherwise the full credit you deserve. In your contract is recompense for the ships. The city is not an SG asset." Xander smirked. "But... we do want to send a few people to study it."
"We'll see," Xander said.
"Thanks, kid. You can decide who."
Xander smirked. "I know." He flipped the steaks. "Want me to put yours on here?"
"Please." He let Xander take his still cold but now unfrozen steak to put on the grill. He petted the dragons. "How did you do without him?"
"We had him," Xander assured him. "And Mira. They curled up all the time. They romped in the snow. They played with the cows. They occasionally made Dawn mad by eating a calf on her. We had a great time."
"Even better. Colonel, please show us our new ships?"
"Sure. Are you flying both, sir?"
"No. Jon!" he called.
"Chill already," he said dryly as he walked in. Faith was behind him. "I had to wake her up." He handed her to Xander, who hugged her. "So, these new ships?"
"Seven new ships," Evan corrected. "Three battle space cruisers. Then some lighter atmospheric and sub-light year ones. Plus one Xander won in a poker game."
"That's still his property, we're just borrowing it for study," Jack told them, getting grins back.
"Killer." He let them lead them through the doorway. "Wow."
Xander grinned. "Ever." She looked and sighed in pleasure. He grinned. "I ran around so naked most of the time." He flipped Jack's steak, sending it and a beer to him when it was done. "I even made you and Buffy presents."
"I love presents," Faith said.
"Go get Buffy. I'll hand them over." She used Dawn's doorway to get Buffy summoned. She saw the Doctor sitting there and 'aww'd then shuddered. "Scary things, Doc."
"Quite, but he's a dream most of the time when he's not vomiting on Rodney." Martha walked in and Dawn walked in with Buffy. "There you are. I missed you at your office. Mickey was most upset that I had a child without warning anyone."
"You are more adorable than in John's picture, little man." She sat down to cuddle him. He sighed in pleasure as he snuggled into her chest. "Such a little dream. I almost want one myself."
"Labor does hurt," he warned. "Dreadfully so. Even when Owen cuts it out of you."
Owen shrugged. "You almost had a full birth canal growing, Doctor. Ever was helping you compensate."
"Good point. That would've hurt more I suppose. Plus made Jack drool." They all laughed, including Jack. They had made peace with everything that had happened between them. They were now like he had with Xander. It was comforting. "You know, this means I'll have to settle down a bit. Not fully of course, but no more radiation or novas. No more things that can get the Tardis destroyed." He stared at him. "More diapers in the Tardis as well. I'll have to up the air filtration for the smell." Martha smiled and nodded. "By the way, he's making that face again." He handed her a diaper and cloth to clean him.
"Fine, I can change diapers. They taught us in medical school."
"I learned how by ducking the pee missile," Dawn quipped. Martha laughed but she could change little boys. She smiled at her father and stepfather. They had done the same sort of joining the trio had. Jack was looking a bit shaky and pukey again. She looked at Owen, glancing at Jack when she caught his eye.
"Yes, you're having a sibling," Owen assured her dryly. "We think a girl."
Dawn squealed and hugged him.
"Wow," Buffy said. "And here I need a new boyfriend." They all snickered at that. "What did Xander want?"
"Presents," Dawn said.
Buffy grinned and walked through the doorway. Faith was already in there. "Hey."
Xander hugged her. "I made you something."
"What did you make me?"
He pulled out the two boxes, letting them see them. "There's one for each of you."
Faith opened the bigger one. She gasped, pulling out the axe. It was lighter than she expected. "Oh, wow, boytoy. This is wonderful." She stepped back and gave it a practice swing, nodding she liked it. She checked the edge. It was sharp enough to split her skin without hurting. "Damn."
Buffy took out her sword, sniffling. "I love it." She hugged Xander. "Thank you!"
"You're welcome," he said with a smile. "They should keep that edge until about a century from now if you're chopping bricks with it every day. If not, we'll have to laser sharpen it."
Buffy hugged her sword, looking at the axe. She let Faith switch with her to look it over. "Why black?"
"The local steel was black steel," he said. "It's a really hearty, strong steel."
She switched back. "Thanks, Xander." She went to show it to Dawn. "Look what Xander made me."
"That's very sharp," the Doctor warned. "Away from my son please, Buffy."
She looked and moved away. "I wouldn't want to hurt the baby even if he peed on me because I know babies can't really control that." She let Dawn see it.
"He did manage to get the finest, micro edge on it," she decided, handing it back with a smile. "He forged it without a shirt on most of the time too." Buffy stared at her. "We had a vacation on another mystical city."
"Oh. Okay." She smiled. "Can you send me so I can brag to Mom and Giles?" Dawn sent her home. "Mom, look what Xander made for me," she called, finding her in the kitchen. Joyce smiled at it. "It's really sharp. Faith got an axe."
Xander smirked at Faith. "Ronon worked with me on my style. He can help you with yours."
She hugged him and walked off. The dragons were fawning over Ronon, they had missed him, so she sat beside him. "X made it for me."
He looked it over. "It's very sharp. Lighter than I expected." He handed it back. "We will work on training you to it tomorrow." He smiled and petted the little beast who loved his hair. Then the two dragons.
Miko walked down to the cryo chambers, smiling at Carson's clone. "I do miss you, Carson. You would have made this last visit a lot more fun if you had been here." She touched his chamber. "You might have even calmed Xander down." She checked the readings and went back to her room. Atlantis was ignoring her right now. She uploaded pictures onto her personal computer, making the AI of the city happier. "Atlantis." She appeared. "Ever sent you a data burst."
"I have not decoded it yet," she admitted. "I am still mad at them and her."
"What they did wasn't anything to do with her," Miko said. "They built her after they got there. She didn't even want to have weapons in case the Ori showed up. Though she was programmed to defeat the Ori if they showed up."
"Really. They built her after they left the others. She had nothing to do with that."
Atlantis smiled and nodded. "I will decode it. She must be lonely but Xander was probably very nice to her."
"He taught her much, including about sparring practice."
"Not many would remain totally peaceful after watching them spar," she agreed. "Even I felt more militant and I do not have lust." She disappeared to read it over in private. Nila showed up to help her but she was soothed in a large way by that. That and that Xander was back with them.
O'Neill landed his ship on Atlantis' dock, as planned. He was a day late because he had taken the extra time to fly the new lighter ships before landing. He and the two he had with him stepped off happy and content. "Atlantis." She appeared. "This is the Jon O'Neill. The other coming in is the Radek Zelenka."
She squealed. "They named a ship after Radek?"
"Xander turned it down." She smiled at that. "Watch them for me?"
"I can do so. May I scan her?"
"Yes you may."
She scanned the new ship and the one coming in. "That's much different than the ones that used to see us in Pegasus."
"Rodney's new design with the new stuff they found in the other city."
"Wonderful. She will do very good against the wraith, General." She looked up. "The president is looking for you."
"Beam him here if he's not busy." She went to ask him that and brought him back with her. "Sir," he said, saluting. "Sorry, I was detained testing out the new ships."
"I saw that wallet sucking notice, O'Neill." He looked behind him, gaping. "Is that one?"
"This is one of the new smaller battle cruisers. Rodney McKay will soak us for more if we want plans for a larger one. She'll have a crew complement of about a hundred-fifty."
"Interesting. Show me around?" He nodded and let him inside to show him everything. While on the tour he looked at him. "I like Landry there."
"Your geeks don't because he's been playing with the contracts and staffing."
"That used to get us a lot of hires from Area 51, sir. They didn't want to deal with him. He's back in dictator mode."
"I understand why. Area 51 could really use him back." Jack smiled. "Who would get it?"
"Ellis and Sheppard both declined. I would suggest McMahon's new protege of doom. He was actually one of us very early on and left."
"Huh. We'll see." He looked around the gym area. "This is nice."
"You have to keep up muscle mass in space. Even with artificial gravity."
"Interesting." They looked in a crewman room then back to the bridge. "How fast is she?"
"I got from near the supergate to here in under a day, sir."
"Wonderful. That's worth the wallet pain. I heard the others got their contract redone by McKay as well?"
"He does drive a hard bargain and he does look out for the project. He's been with us for a long time. He's another one that left Area 51 to get away from Landry."
"I see." He nodded. "Fine, I'll nominate that other general." Jack smiled. "Anything else that I should hear?"
"They did ask to make sure that you don't have a new snake, sir."
"No! I'm not snaked!"
"Fine. Just checking." The president sneered at him. Jack smirked back. "Yeah, we know you've turned Ori, sir. It's pretty clear to all of us."
Jack snickered. "Sir, do you think we haven't fought without learning something of their ways or decorating schemes?" The two Secret Service guards with them stiffened. "Guys, he's an Ori." They took him off to the main base to see what that meant exactly. Jack went back to DC to talk to his nominee for the SG head. He leaned into the office. "Tag, you're it." He smirked evilly. "Landry's going back to Area 51." He walked off again.
General McMahon looked at his junior general and shrugged. "I have no idea."
"I think I do, sir, and I'll miss you when I'm in Colorado."
"Watch out for my people from Eureka."
"I will, sir." He saluted and went to see if it was a done deal or not. Jack had already told the vice president what was going on. So yes, he had a new posting.
Jack smiled at the people who were gathered for new rank and medals day. The ones from Atlantis had already been done but Sheppard got a medal there and a rank raise during this one. Nila's team was there as well. Jack smiled at the man in front of him. "To make a major announcement now that all the new higher ups are swearing at me," he said, getting a few laughs. John had silently sworn at him. He could see it on his face. "We're doing some admin shuffling. General Landry is being sent back to Area 51 as of today." A few cheered and a few clapped politely. "In his place, it's not me."
"Thank you, God I Don't Believe In," Rodney said to the ceiling of the gate room. A few more people laughed at that.
"Funny, McKay." He looked around and waved someone out. "Some of you old timers know your newly promoted general. He's been a general now about six months." He smirked at him. Then at the group. "For those who don't know, Louis Ferretti used to run SG-2 wayyyy back when I was still a newbie to gate travel." That got a lot of clapping. "It's all yours, Ferretti. Have fun with it and protect us all."
"I'll do my best, sir." He saluted him, getting one back. He looked around. "I don't want to change much but if some people aren't happy with their placements, let me know. Also, I've had more geek times recently. That thinktank that's helping on Nila? I've been working with their overseeing general. They have *nothing* on the insanity here but they do like to cause emergencies." He smiled. "Thank you for being more sane, people."
Most of them laughed at that. "Sheppard, I believe you have a city that will pout at me if you don't properly introduce me. Mitchell, I believe you have the other. I want to meet them later today if possible." They both put down image projectors, which brought the AI's. "Ladies," he said with a smile and a nod. "I'm General Louis Ferretti. The SGC is now mine. I hope we can form a good working relationship. I was one of those unpretty grunts way back when we started."
Atlantis smiled. "I have seen your records, General. You do not do too badly."
"My geeks have talked about you," Nila agreed with a smile. "You should meet Xander."
"I'll meet Xander later when I bring out his contract." They smiled and disappeared. "Mitchell, I don't need a tour. I'll come do that when it's a calm day. Sheppard, same to you and I want to look at the new ships if I can."
"Of course, sir. They're yours now."
"Yeah, the new president was impressed and awed. He said it was worth the wallet hit." He grinned. Then at the others. "For now, it's business as usual. Go make us friends, enemies, and try not to start any wars like O'Neill did, people." They walked off talking. He looked at Jack. "I'm gonna screw this up."
"So did I but we still saved the world." He clapped him on the back with a smile. "Where is Harris, Sheppard?"
"Hiding from the medals," Cam said dryly. "He's presently at home, in the huge ass tub, with bubbles, his dragon, and reading something smutty. That way he'd horrify anyone who beamed him out for one reason or another, sir."
"Him appearing naked, bubble covered, and hard would probably shock most everyone, yeah," Jack decided. He smiled. "You'll like Xander. He's a good guy. He doesn't want attention. He won't put up with shit. If you're doing something wrong, he'll tell you. He tends to handle problems and then tell you that they existed. He's the one who did the Trust's board, as I found out the next day."
"Excellent. He sounds like a relative of yours."
"Not quite but I'd gladly claim the kid. Let's go to Nila." They disappeared. Sheppard and McKay went to get treats off the base shop. They were lacking sweets again on Atlantis. She had locked them up to ground them for worrying her.
They landed and Ferretti looked around, nodding. "This is sweet. Compact, the new docking area looks nicely constructed. The atoll looks like a good place to relax."
"All but a few tentacle plants a jealous botanist threw out there," Cam told him. "And the vegetable garden half of Botany hates to deal with."
"Even better. I can feed politicians to the tentacles." He walked on, looking around. "Damn, the rooms are small," he said when they walked into Xander's.
"Yes, sir, they said they're building us some new ones off the city."
"Even better." He shut the door once they had squeezed out of the way and Cam took his hand to get him through the house. "This is nice," he said, looking around. Two bubble covered little forms ran out. "What're you?"
"The one on the right is Mira, McKay's pet dragon. The other is Armand, he's Xander's pet dragon." He petted them both. "This is the new general, guys. General Ferretti." They sniffed and nosed up at him then ran off to the garden. "No, we don't need rhubarb. We just need Xander for a minute then he can go back to reading in the tub." They ran back in and went back to playing with the bubbles. He smiled. "Xander's had Armand for a very long time, sir."
"Pets can be good." Xander came out tying his robe. "Mr. Harris. General Ferretti, the new guy in charge of the madness in Colorado."
Xander smiled and shook his hand. "Daniel told me about you, General."
"I did always like Daniel." He smiled and pulled out an envelope. "I believe I have your contract here with the ones for your boyfriends."
"We're joined now," he said quietly, staring at him.
"Hey, marriage is good for a soul. Means you're not alone if you chose well," he said with a smile. Xander relaxed at that. He let him see his contract. Radek and Evan didn't come when he called so he saw the boy sigh and stomp back to Nila.
"People, you're annoying the hell out of me and taking me from my time in the tub!" he bellowed. "Do not make me put on clothes!" The fighting geeks stopped. "Thank you!" He looked at Cam since he had followed him. "Guys, the new general brought our contracts?" They followed, looking smug. He grinned at the general, who was petting Mira. "Aww, you decided to stop playing in the tub, Mira?"
"I think she had an itchy spot," Ferretti said. He handed over the contracts.
They read them over and signed. "Thank you," Xander said quietly.
"Kid, I hate politics more than most. I saw it nearly destroy all of us a few times. I won't be playing that game here. I know how important the work you all do is, including about your other part-time job." He winked and took them back. "Thanks, guys. Have a good day geek wrangling. Watch out for them causing problems. They sure as hell do in Eureka." He stood up. "Harris, what do you need on the city?"
"A few bigger work areas and bigger rooms?"
"I saw the rooms. We'll fix that when we can. Work areas?"
"Anyone that doesn't work in one of the labs basically has a boardroom sized space," Evan said. "Linguists have stuffed theirs full and Xander's office too, sir."
"Just like Jackson did to his office." He nodded. "We'll look into expanding the dock then." He smiled and left, being beamed back to the mountain so he could check out his office. "Walter, still here I see."
"Yes, sir. Probably until the day I die dialing the gate."
Ferretti looked at him. "Make sure it doesn't happen soon, Walter. We all know how important you are around here." He went into his office, seeing a pretty brunette woman waiting on him. "Which one of my geeks are you, miss?"
She smirked. "I'm Doctor Carolyn Lam. Head doctor."
"Ah. You're Hank's daughter." He stared at her. "I got told after he got moved."
"Why did he get moved?"
"He decided to play some politics and try to offer a few of you geeks to some other programs for a bit. Including Harris. He was going to force him with his new contract."
"Oh." She nodded. "My father can be a hardass. He didn't ever really understand Xander."
"I know plenty of guys like Xander and Jack O'Neill." She smiled at him. "I need a list of anything you need updated or fixed."
"I want to look at the new city's medical bays."
"What new city?"
"Xander found another city of the Ancients but it's land-bound and it's nowhere near here. No gate."
"Why no gate?"
"They were peaceful. Totally peaceful. That's why they split off."
He considered that. "Do we control the city?"
"No, I think Xander does with Sheppard, McKay, Xander's boyfriends, and possibly some people from Torchwood," she said dryly.
"I don't care if he's got boyfriends or girlfriends, Doctor. I think that's a stupid rule." She smiled at that. "I'm happy for them if they are as long as no drama gets spread. We have too much with all the threats."
"Agreed. They tend to fight at home so it doesn't spread."
"Even better." He smiled. "Ask him. Tell me how long you'll be gone for, make sure you have someone to cover for you."
"Thank you, General."
"Call me Ferretti. You'll probably want to swear at me sometime," he quipped. She smirked and nodded, leaving him alone. He sat down, getting comfortable. Walter had given him a brand new chair. It was so nice of him. Yeah, he could handle this assignment. As long as Fargo stayed in Eureka.
Xander came out for dinner that night, running into a few pissed off looking geeks. "What?"
"You were off today?" one asked.
"My contract wasn't active until Ferretti got here earlier."
"Oh." They nodded. "So that's why you've been gone." Xander nodded back, smiling some. He picked up Armand to pet him. "Botany is becoming a monster."
"I'll check with Botany later."
She appeared. "You will not because you were on that other city."
Xander stared at her. "Yes, I was. We built new ships, found you some new samples, all that."
She pouted. "We're not allowed to like that city."
"I don't care if you do or not, Botany. I like that city. The same as I like this city and you." She slumped. "I'm not going to give up Eterna totally."
"But..." She pouted at him. "We're just as pretty and we have weapons. The ones who left said they wouldn't."
"There's a few that we made because some Ori are close. Just because she's pacifist doesn't make her bad. She's been alone a long time, just like you and Nila were."
"I understand but the programming says I should not like you anymore."
"Have Rodney fix that for you." She smiled and went to talk to him. Xander smirked at them. "Other problems?"
"The military guys won't let us play the shooter games until we qualify on the range?"
"I'll ask Evan and Cam." They beamed at him and wandered off. "Things are back to normal," he told them. "Starting today."
Xander walked into the mess, looking around. "Yes, we finally got new contracts," he said smugly. He got food and sat down near Radek. He was surrounded by geeks who wanted to talk about the new city. They shared a look. "Guarded," he said.
Radek nodded. "We can do so. Rodney would love to brag." He looked at them. "I will arrange for a guarded tour of the new city. Though we made plans of everything there." They went to call Rodney to look those over. He smiled, shifting down to pet Armand and his boy. "How was your time in the tub?"
"Pretty good. They played all afternoon in the bubbles for me. Let me nap and read." He grinned, eating a bite. "You can really taste the difference between the fresh cow and this cow." He looked down. "Is that liver?"
"Yes," Radek huffed. "All of us from Atlantis have protested."
"At least it's not pseudo liver," Cam said as he sat down. "I heard that was disgusting."
They both nodded. "Very," Xander told him. "Jon held the ship hostage to get no more liver." He ate it anyway, he was hungry. "How's Atlantis doing? She hasn't shown up today."
"She's fine," Cam assured him. "Got pictures of the new city?" Radek handed over his computer, he had film. Cam watched it, head tipped slightly to the side. "Wow. Very beautiful and huge."
"Very huge," Xander agreed with a smile. "But beautiful and peaceful. Even when the cows are outside."
"We had to eat something," Xander said dryly. He looked at Radek. "Did we leave the ice cream churn?"
"We left most everything in case we needed it again," he reminded him. Xander nodded, eating another bite. "It was good ice cream."
"It was," Xander agreed with a smile. "Think Evan wants to replay that first birthday soon?"
Radek considered it. "He would have to be in infirmary for many days, Xander."
"How long were you guys there?" Cam asked quietly, glancing around.
"Five years." Radek smiled. "Many things got better. Even Rodney quit fussing at things. Plus we found citrus he is not allergic to."
"Wonderful! Did he finally eat some?"
"Yes, he's slightly addicted to lemon tortes," Xander said dryly. "Or sorbet." He grinned. That was his corruption of Rodney's diet.
"I'd like to look at those," Cam decided. "So would the other botanists."
"I have cuttings for all of them."
"Even better." Cam smiled. "You do look happier."
"We are happier," he agreed. "A lot happier."
"We had many talks," Radek agreed. "The Doctor's new son nearly had Miko wanting one."
Xander cooed. "She'd be a great mom."
"Yes she would."
Cam smiled and nodded. "She'd definitely have the edge on how to treat temper tantrums thanks to McKay's." They smirked at that. "You two are nearly scary now."
"Some days," Xander agreed. "Make sure Radek or someone reminds me to wear clothes for a bit."
"Of course we will," Cam said. "You ran around naked?"
"It saved on laundry," Radek said dryly. "Everyone ran around naked sometimes." Cam shivered. "Only Dawn and Miko there to protest."
"Hmm. Interesting. Can I see?" They nodded. "Thanks, guys." He got back to his dinner. Xander and Radek finished theirs and went home for the night. Cam went up to dream about the new city. It sounded nice. Somewhere peaceful to retire to, after he got to the same stage of battle burnout that Xander had.
Nila appeared in the house late that night, looking around. She spotted the new doorway and smiled. "Eterna?" she called quietly. The other AI appeared. She hugged her. "Welcome back."
"Nila." She smiled. "Thank you for welcoming me. My people were very kind about how nice you were to them."
Nila smiled. "Xander found me after I had been alone for a very long time. He is like family to me as well."
Eterna smiled. "I will share the family with you and Atlantis if she wishes. Radek has told me more will be coming soon to see how pretty I am."
"You are quite beautiful." She smiled, pointing at the one that had just appeared. "This is Botany. She's in one of the labs. Xander and she talk often."
Botany bowed. "My creators were not happy with yours but Radek has made me see that I cannot ignore you because you are technically family."
Eterna bowed back. "I am always happy to have more family." Botany smiled. "Xander has a great many plants to show you. Including a lemon that Rodney is not allergic to."
"Really? He must adore that," she said happily. "I have heard stories of cows?"
"Xander did bring a few for their needs." She pointed. "I am there. You may borrow some of my projectors." They went to see the new city. Botany had learned how to go to Atlantis to help that lab there and often went to the mountain to upset the lab there because they were doing stupid things. They marveled at the new plants, the new designs, that she still had a ship. Atlantis joined and looked around, looking confused. Her sisters gave her a hug. She smiled back. "Xander taught me," Eterna told her.
"He taught us as well," Atlantis assured her. "What did they do here? You are in better shape than I was from all the water and power drains."
Eterna flashed over the memories of the last five years. It only took nanoseconds between them. They all grinned at the silliness of their family. They settled down to play gin rummy. Rodney had taught Eterna and Atlantis both so they taught the others. Each one got to change their hands to what they wanted them to look like but otherwise it was a family of older, wiser women sitting down to gossip and chat. Like it should be. Their finder Xander would be so proud that they had worked it out between themselves.
back to index