Notes: NC-17, Lupin/Sylvia/Jigen, Lupin/Jigen.
Being the Mommy.
Xander walked into the lingerie shop she remembered from the other timeline and blushed. "I've grown apparently and *nothing* fits," she told the saleswoman. "Help?" The woman chuckled and led her back to the extra-large bra section of the store, helping her fit the first one to figure out a size. Since she'd have to order most of them, they picked for style. It didn't pay to be a DD cup. Especially when you couldn't harness the stupid things. She did pick up some lingerie and some panties since she didn't have that many left. She paused at the stockings, then picked out six sets she liked, including a pair that was striped green and white horizontally up the legs. So what if she looked like an odd candy cane, she liked them. She paid using his favorite credit card, then took what she had been able to get out of the store and up the street to her car, where it was put into the trunk and the bag was firmly tucked closed. Then she went to the clothing store that sold workout clothes. It was nearest and they might as well find her some sportsbras. The woman gave her a small leer so she blushed and played with her ring. "Not my fault they increased in size."
"Are you pregnant?" she asked.
"No, but I've had one in the last few years and they did this before," she admitted lightly. She leaned over and kissed the woman on the cheek. "Thank you for not assuming." She headed back to the workout pants, pulling out what she wanted. The saleswoman came back and put a few things back and handed her better quality pieces, still leering at her. "My, do you work on commission?" she teased.
"No, but I'd be more than happy to help you fit those."
"Hmm. My men might not like that."
"Men," she said with a lick to her lips. "Then again, I haven't had a woman in a bit. Let me call and we'll see." She called Lupin's phone since he was trying to catch up to her. "Dear, the fitter is *so* helpful and wants to help me fit things personally. Do you mind?" She chuckled and hung up. "He said to be happy and go for it." She kissed the woman hard and the woman went weak in the knees. "My, that's a gorgeous look on you, dear. Still want to help me?" The woman nodded and helped her out of her clothes in the changing room, then Xander turned the tables and got her good on the small bench seat. The small mewling noises just turned her on more. Finally the woman got off so she pulled back to lick her lips again. "Delightful. I appreciate such personal help."
"Anytime," she moaned. "Next door, the leather shop. You'll adore it over there."
"My men will be here then," she said with a purr. "Come, let's get this bought and then I'll go there." She bought everything then put the bags in the car, closing the hood as Lupin pulled in behind her. She sat on the trunk of her car, giving him a steamy look. "Dear, may I have a kiss?"
"Damn straight you are," he said as he got out, kissing her. "Mm. Strawberry body wash. Interesting." He kissed her again.
Jigen coughed once then pulled him off to get a kiss of his own. "No more playing with the fitters," he ordered. "If you want women, break in Bix."
She smiled and ran her nails through his beard. "Such a jealous man?"
"No, just practical. No more doing the fitters."
"I only had her, she didn't touch me at all," she promised. "She only made me warm."
"If you're good, we'll fix that for you," Lupin promised. He pulled her off the trunk and into the back seat to have her, Jigen getting in to get him out of the way for his own pleasure. The door barely closed but they enjoyed it a lot. She was good for them, made them feel young. Then they got out and followed her into the leather shop, where they caught the shop helpers kissing. "Don't stop on our account," he offered. "Our woman can be helped by us. We know just what we want to see her in." They laughed and came over to help, finding a pair of leathers for Lupin too. He wasn't sure where he'd wear them but Xander pouted so he got them anyway.
Jigen rolled his eyes as Xander came out in an outfit. "Dear, you look like Dawn. Look like Xander."
She unzipped it partially and his jaw clicked shut. She did look hot in it. "Better?"
"Much," he agreed. "You still look like Dawn."
Xander walked back into the fitting room and came out in a tiny leather top and a pair of leather pants, with a shirt unbuttoned over the tiny sportsbra like top. "How's this?"
"Much more you," Lupin purred.
"She can't wear it anywhere, but I like it," Jigen admitted. She laughed and came over to kiss him. "You can't."
"I can if I want to." She leaned against his chest, whispering in his ear about where she could wear the outfit, just to tease him. He was getting hard and he knew it, so he patted her on the butt. "So can I?"
"Fine, but I reserve the right to put you back into your room until you find some real clothes."
She shrugged as she strolled back in.
"Those pants do wonders for her butt," Lupin said, watching it.
"I can see her wearing them on a job," Jigen agreed. "Xan, we'll need you to get bathing suits, remember?"
"I do." She came out in a vest, and the pants. "Like it better?"
"I do, but now you look like a vampire bitch, honey."
"So?" She grinned. She went to change, coming out in the dress Jigen liked her in, handing over everything. "I'll take it. Guys, I've already done workout clothes, lingerie, and this place. Next is a woman's clothier or swimsuits?"
"Save the swimsuits for last," Lupin suggested. "That way Jigen can get all his properness out in one shop."
"Sure." She took the bags and signed her slip, taking her card back. Then they went to lock those things in the trunk and go to her favorite clothing shop. It was larger than average, not couture, and it held a lot of nice things. Lupin hated it, but she liked it and Jigen thought the hippie skirts were odd. "I like it," she reminded him.
"I'd rather see you in something you liked and looked good in," Jigen offered. She gave him a long look. "They'll probably be comfy in Bali, but around here?"
"I won't have to cross my legs."
"Lupin can also crawl up them at the table and do naughty things to you," Jigen agreed, "but get some real clothes anyway." She sighed and took those things, then went to get other clothes that they'd like, coming out of that other store. Lupin took her by the arm and led her into his favorite shop, which got her a few suits and a long and passionate kiss in the changing room for humoring him. Then they went to lunch, and had another quickie in the car, in the park this time, before going for swimsuits and some jeans.
Lupin leaned over as they came out of the swimsuit store, not having been able to see any of what she picked out, and whispered in her ear. "Gods, I want to have Jigen drive your car home so I can have you sit on my lap the whole ride home," he hissed. "All those bumpy back roads. All the twists and turns. All of it while you're firmly planted on me."
She smiled at him, subtly wiping off her ear. "Why are you so much hornier now that I'm in this form?"
"Because I've been missing girls," he admitted. "I love you enough to go for guys for your pleasure, but I like girls more. Sorry, Xan."
"No, I get that," she promised, kissing him again. "It's all right. Want another quickie?"
"No, dear, I want you. All night, planted on my hips, lips on mine, begging and pleading for release and pleasure." She shivered. "That's all I want. Think we can?"
"Only if you call Goemon and tell him we're staying over tonight," Jigen said from behind them. "Then I'll agree and have her when you're too tired."
"We can work that out," Lupin decided. He pulled out his phone, calling his daughter. "Put Goemon on, Sierra? Yes, I do want to stay over. Why?" He grinned. "Sure." He kissed Xander gently. "From your daughter. Hey, Goemon. Have you got it? Xander's been doing the whole clothes thing and I'm about to pop." He smirked. "Yes, that way. It's either this or we're trading cars so I can have her on the way home. Thanks, man." He hung up. "We're cleared as long as we get back by a decent hour tomorrow morning."
"Then I guess I'm yours," Xander offered. Jigen chuckled as he led her away, taking the bags to put into the trunk, and then taking her from Lupin to drive them to the hotel he liked best. Lupin liked the hunt, let him hunt them. He got them checked in and upstairs, getting Xander stripped and begging before Lupin even got the door open. He moved away from the dripping wet opening when Lupin growled, sitting in a corner to watch his lovers pounce each other. Xander was just as horny as Lupin was and he was enjoying this tease. He stroked himself gently as Lupin sent her flying in pleasure with his mouth and fingers, then he slid out of his clothes and pounded into her, making her shriek and get off quickly. Jigen decided he couldn't take any more so he stood up and stripped, grabbing some lotion that had been left in the room. He used it to slick himself down and then sent one slick finger into Lupin's ass, making him squirm and tighten up. "Give it up, Lupin, I'm having you. Did you remember the condoms?"
"Fuck!" He found one and slid it over his sticky member, then went back to what he'd been doing, not minding Jigen this time. He felt more fingers be added and winced, but kept up his rigorous pace. He wanted to be the one to make Xander come. He had to have that sweetness for himself. It was addicting. He felt Jigen slide into him and his eyes widened, making him gasp. He whimpered as his backside stretched around the invader, wiggling a bit. "More, Jigen," he ordered.
"Of course there is. There's always more than you think." He finished sliding in and settled for a moment before pulling out and pushing back in as hard as Xander was being pushed into. "Do her too, Lupin. I like it when you go possessive." Lupin moaned and pushed down into Xander's body, following Jigen's pace. Xander was making those pleading and crying noises so he nipped Lupin on the shoulder. "You're falling down on the job, man. Do her better." He started to work, letting Jigen slide in and out of him as he moved back and forth. He was the piston between them, see-sawing back and forth between each pleasure.
"Please," she gasped, clutching at Lupin's arms. "Please, just a bit more!" He growled and worked her harder, making her shriek and come, going limp under him. Then Jigen stood him up bent him at a new angle, taking him harder and faster. Xander was stroking herself now, playing with her wetness as she watched them go at it. "More," she pleaded. "Make him suck me, Jigen. You're damn good behind him." Jigen moved Lupin so he could suck at the pretty clit and lap up the sweetness, but he could still pound him flat if necessary. Lupin moaned into her body, clutching it as Jigen rode him harder.
"That's damn hot," Jigen said in appreciation. "Is he doing good, Xan?" She nodded, arching up into the tongue. "Then let him do it. You know you want him to."
"Oh, I do," she moaned. "I want all of him. Leave him hanging, Jigen, let me handle him."
"Of course, princess." Jigen pulled out with a squishy 'pop' noise, releasing Lupin to dive back into her body frantically. Jigen cleaned himself off and lay down beside her to kiss her, then Lupin since he was pursing his lips for one. "Go faster and harder, Lupin. She's not even panting hard yet." Lupin growled and lunged down, latching onto her neck to nip and suck on the pale flesh. She clamped around him but he wasn't done with her yet. He kept going, pounding her into the bed until she was limp beneath him and he was too tired to do anything but spurt the last of his strength into her and collapse on top of her. "Good job. I'll get you later."
Lupin leaned over to suck on the head of Jigen's cock, barely able to do that. He fed on it until it spurted in his mouth, giving him a much needed bit of energy. Then he flopped backwards and lay there like he was dead for a good long time. "Xander alive?" he asked finally.
"And nursing on me," Jigen noted, smirking when Lupin opened his eyes to stare at them. Jigen had a hand between her thighs and Xander was latched onto him like she was sucking milk from his tit. "Don't you want more?" Lupin moaned but he couldn't really move. "Pity, I guess it's my turn. Right, Xander?"
"Yours," she agreed, switching sides. "More, Jigen, please? I'm a nympho for you two." Jigen got her on her stomach and entered her gently, taking his time to work her body higher and higher until she finally came and went limp underneath him. "Can I have the rest of that?" she asked quietly.
"Where do you want it?" he asked, stroking her back slowly. "In your mouth? Back here? On your skin?"
"Hmm. I like feeling it hit my insides and I know I'm not fertile right now." Jigen moaned and came, making her one happy tired person. "Thanks, napping now." She yawned and went to sleep right there, with him on top of her.
"It's been a while since we wore ourselves out in her," Lupin said fondly.
"It has," Jigen agreed. "That other timeline. Damn, I wanna do this again later."
"So we will. You want front or back? Or middle since I owe you one, buddy."
Jigen smirked. "You enjoyed the hell outta it."
"I did, but I still owe you one. Maybe now, since I'm recovered and you're not?" he asked smoothly, sitting up to pounce Jigen, kissing him hard and pulling him against his body. "I should suck her off your tool before I open your ass wide for me."
"If you do, she'll pounce you. She said that's hers."
"And what's hers is mine," Lupin reminded him smugly. He pounced, putting Jigen onto his back to suck him down and clean him off. "Mmm, she tastes good, like us," he noted, working Jigen harder. Jigen was panting and clutching at anything at hand, including Xander's legs. He found the lotion and slicked up a thumb, using it on Jigen's backside. Jigen winced but let it happen. Lupin chuckled into the hard cock and then moved faster and faster, eventually slipping in a second intruder once Jigen got into it. More lotion was added and Jigen shivered at the cool liquid. Lupin got him good and stretched, then pulled himself off the hard cock to take his best friend, staring down at him as he pushed inside his body. Jigen moaned and grabbed his arms. "Just wait, it gets better," he taunted. He worked himself deeper, finding Jigen's pleasure button. Then he went to work on his hole, giving it all he had. Jigen was such a pretty bitch under him. He smirked down at him then swooped in for a kiss, pulling back to pant as he worked harder and harder. Jigen finally came with a quiet moan and Lupin let himself go inside the twitching spot, then went limp on his stomach. "There, I feel better now," he admitted tiredly.
Jigen patted him weakly on the head. "Damn it, I hate it when you're like this."
"Don't worry, Jigen, you're not a virgin by any means. Next time we'll have to tease you more but you're getting it again and again, buddy."
"You and me both," Jigen reminded him.
"Sure, babe." He looked up with a grin. "I can take it if you can." He kissed him again. "Next time hands and knees or against the wall?"
"We'll have to wait and see. Xan might mind us going at it all the time."
"She likes to watch and then take on the winner," Lupin said smugly, shifting so he was between his lovers, pulling Jigen on top of his chest. "We should sleep and then get dinner."
"We should," Jigen agreed tiredly.
Lupin smirked and felt contentment as Xander curled up next to him, lounging across him and Jigen, wiggling until she felt comfortable. This was peace.
Lupin was drawn out of his wet dream by a scream and a piece of the warm blanket covering him heavily sitting up, flailing. He woke up in time to grab the hand before it connected with his nose and Jigen had already moved to hold Xander so she'd quit crying. "What's wrong?" he asked, sounding just like he did when he had soothed his daughter's nightmares. "Xander? Come on, babe, we need you back."
"Don't go," she pleaded, clutching Jigen's chest. "Don't go to that country that invited us. It'll be horrible!"
"Shh," Jigen whispered, patting her hair gently. "What country? What invitation?"
Lupin shifted to get her back, holding her tightly against his chest. "Xander, is this like the dream where you and Goemon went back to visit his family or like the one with the vampires?"
"Both," she sobbed. "They...." She shook her head. "They invited us, then they made you choose." She gasped. "They said they'd kill the other one. One of us had to die." Jigen clutched her tighter. "I sent you guys ahead and chose an honorable combat, getting the guy, but it took me months to get out of there. I was hurt and no one even gave me a bandaid. They all hated me."
"Then we won't go," Lupin said simply. "There's no way we're going anywhere they'd make me choose between you two. I'd have to kill them all first." She turned and clutched him, nearly strangling him. "Jigen, can you please get me a smoke?" he asked quietly. Jigen nodded and got them both one, lighting them and handing one over. "Thanks," he mumbled around it. He took a few deep drags then let one hand take it to hold while he held her. "I promise, I'm not going there, Xander. We won't go. If it's that bad, we're not going anywhere near there, not even to solve it."
She nodded, wiping her eyes off. "You think I'm silly."
"No, love, we think you're odd, there's a difference," Jigen assured her stroking her back. "What's their deal?"
"You can be anything you want, but you can't be bi and you have to be monogamous. They found out there were three of us and they made Lupin choose. I sent you guys away because you guys were less able to get out of there on your own. They put bomb collars on you so you couldn't even look back and the things poisoned you so you couldn't touch anyone but each other." He stroked Jigen's neck. "I said they'd kill me if they got me in combat, we went at it, I killed him, barely, but I was injured. I spent *months* there. When I got back, you guys had mourned and all that stuff."
"Hey, we're not going to risk you," Lupin soothed, finishing his cigarette quickly so he could hold her again, letting Jigen finish his own smoke. "I'll be damned if we're going anywhere near that country. Even if they do invite us, challenge me to steal their crown jewels to test their security forces, and give us every blessing to stay and be safe for eternity from Interpol."
"That sounds like a quote," Jigen noted.
"That's because it is," Lupin admitted. "The invitation's on my desk." Xander clutched him harder. "Shh, babe. Not gonna happen. Your mine and I'm not giving either of you up. Besides, we would have taken Goemon."
"We did, they sent him away to take care of the kids. Since he was married he couldn't be part of their odd little experiment." She sniffled and got off them, heading for the bathroom. "I'll be right back."
"Sure. You come right back," Lupin ordered. She nodded, shutting the bathroom door behind her. "I honestly hadn't really been thinking of the place," he admitted.
"Do you think it's odd she only gets these after sex with both of us?" Jigen asked.
Lupin nodded. "Yeah, but then again I think it's strange she gets them at all. She's not known for visions. Yet she's had a few perfect ones and a few that just showed upcoming problems, like the thing with Spike." He considered it. "Then again, this is about the same time as she had that one with Pops and Spike in that other timeline," he said thoughtfully, staring at the bathroom. "Coincidence?"
"I hope so. Things seem to be a bit darker in this timeline," Jigen pointed out. He lit another one then got up to listen at the bathroom door, rolling his eyes. "Xan, you nearly done?"
"Yeah. Give me a few more," she said. "I'm gonna take a shower."
"Sure. Let us know if you need help." He walked back to the bed, sitting down away from the suspicious stains. "So, boss, now what?"
"Now, I want to put forth a wild plan so we can leave her alone for a few hours," Lupin offered. "I know you're feeling the same desperation for her that I am. First one to get her for the next few days, and then whoever lands on top?"
"Make her our slut for two days and then we tussle for whoever gets her first?" Jigen said thoughtfully. "It'd work for me." The bathroom door opened, letting Xander out. "Hey, come sit." She padded over and sat between them, wrapped in the fluffy towel. "It's a change of subject, but we want to propose something to save you some wear and tear, babe."
"We want you to be our slut for the next two days," Lupin said, laying a finger across her lips when they started to move. "Jigen and I are both desperate enough for you to kill each other over having you. Just two days and then whichever of us lands on top of the other during the day gets you first. Think about it."
"I'm not a prize."
"You are a prize," Jigen corrected. "Otherwise we wouldn't be keeping you captive at the house." He smirked at her dirty look. "Just think about it. We'd probably jump you all the time otherwise."
"Like earlier. Jigen had me, I had him, and we were both still so desperate for you that it was all we could do not to molest you while you slept. All we need is two days and then we'll figure out who gets to pounce you each night."
"I'm not your sex toy," she reminded them.
"No, you're not, your our wife," Jigen reminded her. "And we want you so desperately that we're willing to kill each other to get you." She gave him an odd look. "Seriously. I had every intention of shoving Lupin out of the way, and out the window if necessary, to get to you myself. You've turned us into desperate junkies for you," he said with a small smirk for her pleasure. "And all we want is you."
She got off the bed, backing away from them. "You guys need mental help." She nodded a few times. "Really, you do." She ran into the bathroom and slammed the door, locking it as fast as she could. She leaned against it, curling up so she could put her forehead on her knees. "Now would be a good time to wake up." She felt something poking her and she blinked a few times, waking up back in the bed. "It was a dream? Please tell me it was a dream. Please, Gods, tell me it was a dream."
"It was a dream," Lupin said softly, smiling down at her. "But not a bad one at least."
"No, just the dream inside the dream was," she snorted. "You're not feeling addicted, right?" He shook his head. "Not in the least?"
"Desperate sometimes but not addicted." He kissed her. "Jigen went to secure food and clean sheets." He kissed her again. "It's an interesting proposition but we'd never do that to you, Xander. We like you too much to make you our slut. Even for two days." She relaxed against his chest. "Now, what was the other one? All I got when you whacked me on the nose was an invitation."
"That little former protectorate of Russia, the one with that kook for a new leader?" Lupin nodded quickly. "He invited us. You can be anything you want but bi or have more than one lover. He made you choose. I made you choose Jigen because I figured if I couldn't fight my way out, it would still be okay. I'm assured a place of leisure, more or less." Lupin grimaced. "So I chose combat as a way to end it all and I won, barely. I was really badly injured and I had to make my way out."
"We would have come back."
"You would have been shot on sight," Xander said flatly. "They put you in explosive collars that poisoned you so you could only touch someone that resonated on the same frequency, I think it was slightly radioactive." She slumped a bit. "By the time I got back it'd been months and you two had already grieved and the kids were moving on. I was so badly hurt that you actually gave up on a big, huge ass diamond to take care of me."
He kissed her to stop the recital. "I'd give up on a job to baby you, but we would have come back for you, Xander. We'd always come back for you." She pulled back to look at him. "We will. You're mine. I always take what's mine."
"I'm not your gun."
"No, you're not, but you're more precious to me than my gun. There are other guns. There's no other Xander." He kissed her again. "I do have that invitation. It sounded really good too. Think we should talk to Pops?"
"Do you really want to talk to Zenny?"
"Well, no," he admitted. "But if it saves other people in love I'd do it in a heartbeat. Even if I had to walk into the station to do it." He looked up as Jigen walked in with trays of food. "Thanks, man."
"Not a problem." He sat the trays on the table, taking them off the stack to place at each seat. "Come on, Xander. You need to eat. Otherwise we'll work you to death." She chuckled uneasily. "What?"
"Her last dream, the one that woke us, had us being addicted to her."
Jigen snorted. "No, I'm addicted to nicotine. There's no room for another addiction in my life. Besides, you can't be addicted to things that are good for you." He pulled her up and sat her in a seat. "Eat. Now. Before I pout."
"You don't pout," she told him.
"You've never seen me but Lupin has and I'm pitiful because I never use it."
"He is," Lupin agreed, sliding out o the bed. "We really should tell someone."
"Can we get Vecchio alone? He'd be indignant but he'd tell the others. Ray might rant and rave too much," she offered.
"What's this about that other place?"
"You can be anything you want, but sleeping with more than one person," Lupin told him. "They found the three of us. She decided that she had the better chance of fighting her way out so she made us choose each other. She thinks she can do that."
Jigen snorted, shaking his head as he looked at his favorite apprentice. "Not able to happen, Xander. We'd have been there with you, fighting alongside of you, and taking them all to hell. You can't make us do anything. You can only convince your stubborn, older lovers." He sat down on one side of her, patting her on the hand. "Was it the same as the Imperial one?" She nodded. "Then I'd think Vecchio would be the better choice. He's a lover, he'd understand."
"Yeah, I think so too," Lupin agreed, coming over to take his seat. He looked underneath his lid, then switched with Jigen. Who switched with Xander, so he got hers and smirked at her. "Ha! I always get the best things. Including you." He kissed her. "Feel better?"
"Yeah," she admitted sheepishly. "I don't know what that is."
"It keeps you off-balance most of the time, but we're not abandoning you. I've told you that before," Jigen reminded her. "Not even if Janus makes you have a litter the next time." She shuddered. "So behave."
"We used a condom, right?"
"You're not fertile yet, he's concentrating on Rupert at the moment, and Dawn. She's having one, Rupert's having the second and then he or Ethan will have the third."
Xander nodded. "As long as I don't have to have any more. Eleven kids is enough."
Lupin nodded. "For everyone. Even if Goemon does have that promised little girl. Hopefully most of ours will be out of the house."
"By then, we may even have grandchildren," Jigen said smugly. "I'm betting on Lotus."
Xander shook his head. "Arsene. She's not careful. She's flighty about her personal safety, and she's a nurturer. It'll happen accidentally on purpose. She'll come home horrified and shocked, then expect us to help her a lot more than we'll want to. Then, after the birth, she'll figure out that crime with a baby is hard."
"Does that mean we should take the ferret?" Lupin asked. "I'm not going to be a grandfather before I'm fifty, I hope."
"You'll be lucky if you're not a grandfather before you're forty," Xander told him. "She's nine. She's already sexually charged. She thinks it's neat and fun." Lupin grimaced. "So we've got to set some realism into her. Think we can get Dawn to let her babysit a teething one?"
Lupin smirked. "I like that idea." Jigen nodded. "We'll talk to her about that. She's got to understand."
"If not, maybe Ethan'll need some for his progeny," Jigen offered. "That would cure Lotus' desire for kids too."
"Those kids are going to be satanic," Xander said dryly. "But if it works, I like that idea," he offered. "I'll talk to Dawn myself."
Lupin smirked. "Oh, let me talk to Pops. Please." Jigen snickered. "I'll even be nice and tie him up this time."
"Sure, babe, you can go taunt Pops." She patted him on the hand, smirking right back. "If we do have another kid, can we call it Draco?"
"Only if it's blond and male," he noted. He kissed Xander gently. "Behave. No more kids. Even if I have to have myself fixed."
"Already done in my case," Jigen assured them both. Xander gave him a look. "Seriously. Radiation to the balls. Irreversibly sterile for the next five years. It's a new procedure in testing. The docs said so."
"Then you're using a condom," Lupin told him. "The same as I will be from now on."
"And I'm taking that pill pack in the morning," Xander assured them.
Jigen grinned. "Thank you, babe. I knew we could count on you. Wanna go on the pill?"
"Do you want me to castrate you when I start having cycles again?"
"No," he admitted. "Never mind."
"I've been thinking about getting myself fixed anyway," Lupin admitted. "Since Arsene and Fred are here, not to mention Sierra and possibly Alex, I don't need more heirs."
Xander kept her 'unless something *really* bad happens, and then we'd better be dead too' to herself. "It's an idea. I'd go with you if you wanted. The bad thing is, they won't do that for someone my age. Apparently we don't know our minds well enough to demand we be fixed."
"Some of the underground ones might," Jigen offered.
Xander shook her head, wiping off her mouth. "Nope. Remember Dr. Carmichael? The guy who caught me changing after that one injury?" They both nodded. "I called and talked to him. I also told him I looked a bit younger than usual this time. He said if I looked anywhere below forty, none of the doctors would even consider it, even the underground ones. If they did, they'd lose their licenses immediately. You see, the people in charge believe that we'll regret it and that we don't have enough sense to know whether or not we want kids. Even if we can prove we've had a few." She got up to get some water from the tap in the bathroom. "It can be worse in the US. He said over there some docs demand three kids or forty-five before they think about shutting things down or ripping them out."
"There's that potato chip clip thingy," Lupin offered.
"It causes pain."
"I'm sure it goes away," Jigen told her.
She shook her head. "All the people I know who had it done had a lot of pain each and every month, not to mention some serious other pains now and then for no reason. I may not feel it but I don't want to take that chance. I don't like being in pain and if I'm going to have nerve-spasm cramps each month I'd rather just not have sex." She took a sip of her water. "There is the IUD, but it's only supposedly safe and it creeps me out to think of a piece of nylon wire up there."
Lupin shuddered. "We'll let you go talk to someone tomorrow," he promised, patting her on the hand. "More than ever, we don't want you to have any kids." He ate a bite of dinner. "This is good, Jigen, nice choices."
"Thanks, Lupin." He looked at Xander. "It'll be fine. We'd never let you do something that would hurt you. Otherwise Lotus' demon buddy Torrence's suggestion of heroin curing the migraine might have been employed."
She grimaced. "No, thanks, really. Tried it once, hated it."
Lupin choked. "When?"
"I was stupid, young, and going to gay clubs," Xander told him. "I was sixteen, I thought it was Ecstasy. Boy did I learn different. Though, X wasn't too too bad," he admitted with a shrug. "The problems of stupid youth. I also did a line of coke and nearly never came back down."
"You told me about that," Lupin reminded him. "Anything else?"
"They tried morphine in the hospital after I lost my eye but I had that nasty reaction to it. I figured I liked breathing a bit too much to try anything like that again. I'm not quite as adventurous as I used to be, guys, or as naive. Now I can tell the difference between drugs by what you're using to take it with. Though," she admitted with a chuckle, "remind me to tell you about the time someone at the Bronze baked acid brownies and Willow got a *huge* chunk of it in her piece."
"I didn't know you can do that," Jigen admitted.
"He did it after baking. He sprayed the top with the solution you put onto the paper for blotter acid. Then he frosted them. Chocolate brownies with vanilla icing. Vanilla covers nearly everything in taste."
"Ooh, that had to be bad," Lupin said, shaking his head. "Did she do a lot of magic too?"
"No, she wasn't active then. This was right before Buffy came to town." She smirked at him. "And Cordy was sworn to secrecy since she was found in a closet talking to the old, nasty, dirty clothes that some homeless guy had left." They both laughed. "So, see, it's interesting. I'm much more worldly now, even more than I had been. Can we go to Paris's small convention next month? I know it's a Skinhead convention but I wanna go make fun of them. I'll even wear robes and act like a Malfoy."
"No, Xander," Jigen said patiently. "They hate us. They like to try and kill us."
"Maybe next year," Lupin offered. "When the kids are in school. That way Arsene can't talk the others into it."
"I just wanted to sneak in and shoe polish some of them," he offered with his cutest grin. "I'll even use pimp shoe colors so we get some who're purple or green, plus some who are brown and black. I'll even do it in geisha mask fashion."
Lupin snickered, shaking his head. "I'll consider it. You won't bring the kids to help you if you do."
"Sure. Can I bring Ishi though? He'd enjoy it more."
"Only if his father agrees," Jigen said. "Can you make a few polka dotted or striped too?"
"Sure, if at all humanly possible," he agreed. "I'd have to look up something that went on quicker than shoe polish, yet still sunk into the skin, but it can be done."
Lupin hugged her, still laughing. "I know just what to use. We'll do it together with Ishi if Goemon agrees. Maybe we'll even stand there and take pictures to cheer up Dawn and Ray." Xander beamed at him so he kissed her. "Better?"
"Thank you for spoiling me." She kissed him then Jigen, making him smile. "What are we doing for the rest of the night?"
"Sleeping without a screaming infant," Jigen told her. "It's a nice change."
She nodded. "Yu's got the worst case of colic I've ever seen." They all nodded at that.
Ray Vecchio was the first one back to the apartment and he opened the door to find Lupin lounging in his favorite chair. "What are you doing here?" he demanded. "Out!"
"Is that any way to treat someone who's bringing you some information that'll piss you off worse than anything else, and is quite illegal by international standards?"
Vecchio slammed the door. "You mean like you hanging out in my apartment, which you had to break into? Or the injustice that you're running around free enough to pester us?"
"Yeah," Lupin agreed.
"Then why haven't you taken care of it?" he asked cautiously.
"Because Xander could die," he said simply. "Every once in a while Xander gets a heads- up from Janus." Vecchio snorted. "I wouldn't believe it either but I've seen it in action and I've been saved by it. Besides, everything I tell you, you can find out on your own if you look in the right places." He tossed over the invitation. "Those people are insane. I love the fact that they welcome openly gay couples and encourage marriage. I don't like the fact that if you cheat, including looking at another person, then you're put to death. Painful, long-lasting death." He stood up and walked closer. "Now, they've invited us, but there's three of us. That alone would get us killed. They're also putting radioactive collars on the people that they're making leave, binding them together for eternity because the radiation will make you sick if you're not with the person you were chained to." Ray grimaced at that. "Which also means that they're exposing a lot of people to biological warfare."
"Why tell me? Why not the other Ray?"
"He'd rant. He's a fighter. You're a lover, Vecchio. You understand how love should be." Lupin shrugged lightly, giving him an honest look. "It took Xander to make me see it. I'm certainly not losing him to those maniacs over there. Also, this one will take some international cooperation and most of the crime families are fairly old-fashioned. They usually don't like me and are scared of me, but they hate me more for liking everyone and anyone, especially my gunmen." He smirked lightly. "Now, if you want, you can do something about this. If not, it's your thing. If you do, I'll also offer you the chance to talk to Sierra and Savannah since they want to become cops and we can't tell them everything."
"The catch is?"
"That I don't have to do it myself, risk Xan's life, and I don't have to leave the kids orphans. Even if you have to get Pops to go to Interpol's little covert part, Interquest, it'd be worth it to the world." He turned and walked out the back door. "I had the trash taken out for you, it stunk, and Xan sent Ray some good beer from Germany, with the shop's address. We're going back to our hideout to play with the kids." He closed the door and locked it behind him.
Ray stood there, shaking his head. He finally cleared it enough to open the window and to looked down at his car. "Hey, Kowalski, Lupin was just here. See if he's still in the alleyway. Then shoot 'im."
"He just zipped past," Benny called up. "The Inspector's coming over."
"Good, we've got one hell of a thing for him." He closed the window and did a quick turn around the apartment, making sure nothing else had been touched. He finished in the fridge, noticing the new takeout containers in the plastic bag next to the beer. "Xander has good, but expensive tastes," he noted. The door opened and he spun, finding Ray K standing there. "Xander ordered you food and beer. Lupin was up here. He took out the trash."
"Good, 'cause I forgot," Ray admitted, grabbing a beer and looking at the address. "That's near his favorite comic shop. Huh. Have to try there." He looked at the receipt taped to the back. "Even better. It's cheaper." He tossed it onto the counter and pulled out the food, searching for his box. He found it and took it into his room to unpack and start a load of laundry. "What did the head crook want?"
"Something about a country where they're killing cheating spouses and using biological weapons to enforce fidelity." Ray came back to his doorway, sipping his beer. "Left something in an envelope. Said Xander saw it? Some sort of prophetic thing?" Ray nodded for him to go on. "That he'd die. He also gave us the right to talk to Sierra and Savannah since they want to be cops."
Ray finished his beer and grabbed another one. "Cool." He went to do his clothes. "Remind me why I hate Iran in the future, okay?"
"Sure," he said, rolling his eyes. "You don't want details?"
"You'll be tellin' the boss, I'll listen then."
"Sure, leave this on my shoulders," he said bitterly. "I can fight."
Benny walked in with his wolf. "What's wrong?"
"Lupin dropped information in my lap."
"Ah." He nodded. "He's done so in the past. Myron said so." He went to put his things in his room, leaving his wolf to roam the apartment. "Is some of that food mine?"
"Lupin left it."
"Hmm." He sniffed the open containers. "Are you sure? Ray?" Ray came out of his room, handing over his box of food. "I'm not sure he left those."
"He did say he left the beer, that Xander got it for you."
"He's probably been to Iran recently," Ray said bitterly. "He could have warned me." He looked in the fridge, coming up with another note under the beer. "Nope, Lupin said he found this in here. He's not sure who sent it, but the mushrooms smelled off when he opened the top box to snoop. Which was the one on the back burner. He also left us the name and the address of a decent restaurant." He tossed the note down. "At least I've got an iron gut."
"You'd have to with the way your ex cooked," Ray Vecchio snorted. "My Ma woulda killed her for some of those dishes she made. I've never seen a dish Dief wouldn't eat until one of hers."
Stanley looked at him. "That's why I cooked most of the time and lived on takeout the rest," he said smartly. Someone knocked on the door. "Enter or be shot."
Dawn stuck her head in. "I hope you wouldn't shoot me or I'll never bring you food again." She pouted at him. "Isn't it good?"
"It smelled a bit off," Ray said cautiously. "Probably where it was chilled. We're lettin' it warm back up." She quit pouting and smiled at him. "No old man?"
"He's on his way over. He's still refusing to ride behind me on my bike. Said he's too old to ride bitch." She walked in and petted the wolf gently. "Hi, Dief. Did you have fun in the sand? Was it like a big kitty box?" she cooed.
Her husband walked in, staring at his wife's rear. Then he looked at Ray and mouthed 'toss it out' at him. Ray smirked and nodded.
"Sir, we had a visitor when we returned," Benny told him.
"Let the man take off his coat," Vecchio complained. "He's a guest!"
"What did the crook want?" he asked dryly. Vecchio handed over the invitation, making him grimace. "So?"
"They're supposedly after Xander, sir, and they're using biological weapons to maintain fidelity. He said they invited the trio but that Xander's life was in danger because he saw it?"
"He has in the past. Janus sometimes gives him some odd dreams," Zenigata admitted. "Anything else?"
"He said Interquest might be necessary. Said they were putting explosive, radioactive collars on the people they were kicking out. He also said we could find this out if we looked in the right places."
"At least it's a job for Interpol this time," he noted. He handed it back. "Look into it your next time in the office, Vecchio. Maybe we can stop this or hand it on." He looked around. "No Myron?"
"Not yet, sir," Ray K admitted. "I'm assuming he fell onto his couch and napped already."
"That's always a good idea. You never know when you'll be called out again. I've had whole years when I didn't see my apartment." He smiled at his wife. "Now I don't have to worry about that so much."
"The cats would miss you," she agreed, smiling at him. He helped her stand and held her while she wobbled. "Oooh, pretty colors," she said as he helped her into a chair. "I hate morning sickness. Have I mentioned this yet?"
"Yeah, you have a few times," Ray K said with a bright grin. "Sucks to be preggers. Just think, Xander can do it too."
"And has," she said bitterly. "Without nearly any problems until Alex. It's no fair."
"Huh?" Vecchio asked.
"Other timeline," she noted. "He had everyone but the older Lupins and the Goemons. Now Rupert's going through it," she said smugly.
"That's a powerful choker," Benny said, eyes wide. "It probably should be destroyed."
"Has anyone noticed the choker's missing a stone?" Ray K asked. Zenigata nodded. "I'm wondering if that's why Xan's still female."
"According to Ethan, Janus decided to keep her female for a bit because he's powering Rupert's pregnancy and choker. If the Watchers bastards try to take him down, he's holding Ethan and Marcus in reserve and he'll magic the baby into them instead. He's a few kids from a prophesied one."
"Speaking of, someone asked me about the ones about Alex," Zenigata noted. "Arsene was not pleased to hear that there was one."
"Arsene's not going to be pleased when my foot goes up her ass either," Dawn noted. "The girl's a baby waiting to happen. Xan wanted to know if she could babysit for us to learn the horrors of children."
"She's watched theirs," Zenigata said with a frown.
"Apparently that hasn't made it through her tiny mind yet. Xan thinks she'll be the first to get knocked up and it'll only be a few years. Some sort of accident on purpose."
"I'd go back to Iran to get away from that fight," Ray K snorted, shaking his head quickly. "I'm hoping it's not Ishi's." Zenigata shuddered in revulsion. "Did you know that Ishi and Xander both got hit on by the stew's on that flight? They wanted ta break 'em in." He sipped his beer with a smug look.
Dawn snickered. "I can *so* see Goemon attacking the plane to get those two stews. Slicing it in half and then chasing them down to chastise them before he stabs them in the heart."
"His ID says he's eighteen," Vecchio reminded him. "His and Xander's."
"Too bad we can't prove otherwise," Zenigata said bitterly. "I'd love to get him for statutory. He'd do hard time like you wouldn't believe."
"Since Xan's an orphan, his parents can't exactly give permission so Lupin can say they went to a judge to get permission and marry them, he's probably got a few in his pocket," Dawn pointed out. She winced and rubbed her stomach. "I hate being pregnant."
"Maybe you should write Xan," Ray K said gently, staring her down. "Maybe she's got some tips or somethin' ta make it easier."
She snorted. "She had two love slaves there all the time and Goemon when they weren't. I doubt they'd be of help to me."
"You don't know unless you try," Vecchio noted. "Or you could write my sister Maria again. She's had enough of them to figured out stuff."
"Maybe I will," she agreed, grinning at him. "Thanks, Ray."
"Welcome, Dawnie." He patted her on the head. "Since the food's not warm enough to eat, should I call for takeout or cook?"
Zenigata's beeper went off and he sighed, grabbing the phone to dial the number on it. "Yes? Yes, this is he. What's going on?" He listened, frowning. "Thank you. We'll be right there." He hung up. "Myron got in a small wreck on the way home. He hit a light pole in the park."
"Why was he that way?" Benny asked.
"It's a shortcut to his place," Ray K said, grabbing his jacket. "Shall we?"
"Yeah, let's get him out. Can you guys put him up? They said he's fine but he needs to be watched."
"Sure, we've got a couch or Kowalski can double up," Vecchio said with a wave of his hand. "I'll cook something." They nodded and left. "Kowalski, breath mints," he called.
"It's a single beer and I'm not driving," he yelled back.
Ray shook his head. "No, but the nurses'll give you funny looks, kid." He cleared the food off the counter and into the fridge. "We'll have it for breakfast," he promised her when he noticed her pout. She smiled at him and he sighed mentally at crossing another mood swing landmine. Some day, they'd have to eat what she cooked. Hopefully it'd be edible by then.
Xander was led into the house, dizzy, weak in the knees, and starving. She knew better than to let one of the guys drive her home, but they had. Fortunately her car had been a rental and the Benz's trunk had room in it. She flopped down on the stairs, sprawling out with her mouth open. She looked up at the quiet cough, waving at their temporary healer. "I'm tired."
"You appear to be so. Magical assault?"
"Men!" She held up three fingers. "Two men!"
He nodded once and came down to check her over. "It appears you need to eat. Your men should know better." He hauled her up and into the kitchen, startling the housekeeper. "Xander needs food."
"That's Xander?" Xander nodded, head lolling to the side. "What did they do to you this time?" she demanded. Xander pointed at the choker. "Oh, really? Lupin!"
"Yes, ma'am," Arsene called.
"Not you, the older one!" she yelled.
"Yes, ma'am," he called from the doorway. "Is Xander back there?"
"Yes, and you'd better explain yourself damn quickly, boy."
He trotted back there, grinning at Snape. "Thanks for finding her. She needs to eat lunch and take a nap." He looked at her. "It's from Janus. She's in it for about a year. She'll be fine, she's simply tired from all the shopping." His housekeeper snorted, hands now on her hips as she glared at him. "Okay, so we had sex in the car too," he admitted. "Would you please make the poor thing a sandwich?"
"You'd better be explaining. That's unnatural."
"Well, not really. Just kinda kinky really. Janus made it for his priests who wanted to change gender. It was given to Xander. Janus is presently busy with Rupert, who's pregnant, so he can't really release Xander fully. Therefore she's stuck like this until the baby's born and the next one is started. So about a year." He grinned. "It's been hers now for a bit. Really."
"Hmph." She stared him down but he didn't even flinch so she knew he was telling the truth. "You just stuck her in that thing?"
"No, she's been taught how to be a proper woman, she's just tired from all the sex in the car," he explained. He grinned again. "She's a wonderful woman of the old style. Classy, elegant, and very good at teasing us. Jigen had her last, yell at him. Please make her a sandwich?" Snape started to chuckle. "Hey, stick up for me!" he complained. "I'll let you take Lotus shopping."
"No, thank you," he said with another laugh. "She is simply exhausted."
"Fine, I'll feed the poor thing, then we'll be talking about girl things with her."
"Hey, that's fine. We've taught her all that we know and I'm sure Murami would agree with me about how female she is when she's not drooling on my shoulder." He grimaced and wiped it off, handing her back to Snape. "Thanks for finding her, we're putting up her clothes. Why couldn't you have brought a house elf with you? We wouldn't have minded Dobby in the least." He went to help Jigen gather the bags out of the trunk, taking them up the stairs to put away. Xander's room was only her closet now so they didn't have to worry about her sleeping in there. That meant things could go on the bed if they had to, and it looked like they might. Lupin had to shoo one of the cats off the leather gear, but otherwise things went well until they found the green and white stockings, holding them up so they both could look and frown.
"Only Xander," Jigen noted, putting them away on the bottom of the pile.
"She'd look like the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz."
"So? That's a Xander thing to do," he pointed out dryly. "Don't believe me, think about it. Who else would wear those things?"
"People with bad taste?"
"Or playful people. I'm sure Xander and Misty probably have some clothes alike."
"Uh-huh. Not exactly the woman I want Xander to be. She's nice, but a bit geeky."
"She's a wonderful girl," Bix said from the doorway, patting Yu on the back. "She's also one of his friends. I wouldn't say that too loudly." Jigen pulled out the stockings, making her grimace and shake her head. "Only her." She walked on, taking the cranky one for a stroll. "Good morning," she told the housekeeper. "This one is fussy yet again." Yu let out a snarl of a whimper. "Yes, I know you don't like to be talked about, Yu."
"I wish I had something but not even we have things for colic," Snape noted. "Perhaps some of our mothers might but I've not been able to scry any of them."
"Go out to the fish pond in the back," Bix suggested. "I've used it before with the kitsune." She looked at him. "When did you give up your ideals of purity?"
"When I found myself in the muggle world without a single wizard like me, unable to apparate home, and unable to take care of myself," he said bitterly. "Then I found the sort of witches like Lotus. It's as close as I'm likely to come until I get home."
"Ah. Necessity," she said wisely. "I felt the same way when I first went up to be a nurse for the kitsune." She walked Yu on as soon as the bottle came out of the warmer, taking him out to look at the trees. He liked trees. He didn't cry at them.
Snape shook his head. "That woman is odd."
"Yes, but then again she's earned it. She's centuries old, kept young by the furry little beasts. They shed too you know."
"I'm sure it's the stress of dealing with the children," he said nicely enough as he took the sandwich to put in front of Xander. "Eat. Now."
"Yes, mommy." She put her head down and napped on top of it.
Fred toddled in and climbed into her lap with a sigh of relief, latching onto a nipple he could see through her shirt.
Bix saw him and came back in, frowning at him. "What are you doing? Get off her!"
"Eat!" he said, scowling at her. "Mommy!"
"I know she's your mother, but you're not breastfeeding anymore. You drink from a cup."
"Meanie! Daddy!!!" he screamed, breaking out in tears. Lupin came trotting down the back stairs. "Eat me! Mommy! Meanie!" he howled, pointing at Bix.
"It's the Lupin half of him," she said bitterly. "He crawled into Xander's lap for a snack."
He patted Fred on the top of the head. "She's really tired, Fred, so you can't have a snack on her now. Why don't you have a cup of milk instead." His son scowled at him so he frowned back. "Let her sleep, Fred."
"Not now you're not." He picked the kicking baby up, putting him up to his shoulder. "Someone needs a nap. Hey, Xan, wanna nap on the bed, with real pillows that don't squish and smell like mayo?"
"No." She sat up, rubbing her chest. "What happened?"
"Fred decided you were a buffet," Bix said dryly.
Xander tweaked the baby's foot. "You drink from a cup now. You can only get cuddles from the mommy."
"Daddy!" he howled.
Xander stood up, getting close enough for the baby to smell. "I'm the daddy too," he promised. "You can only get cuddles now, Fred. You're a big boy and big boys drink from cups." He took the baby to hold, soothing him gently. "Come on, let's nap. It sounds like we both need one." She took him up the stairs, putting him in bed with her, though she did change out of her dress and stockings and into pajamas. She laid down beside the baby, cuddling him. "See, you're too big to eat from the mommy. Only babies do that and you're a big boy," she said tiredly. "That's why you eat solid food with a spoon, Fred, because you're a big boy. You also can't go back. So get used to it, son. Your other daddy would get mad if he had to share." She stroked his hair, putting herself to sleep.
Fred, in his finest son-of-Xander fashion, waited until she was fully asleep and did it anyway. At least until one of the daddies came in and pulled him off again, putting him back into his crib, where he wailed pitifully until Lotus came in to soothe him. Then he tried on her, but she didn't taste right. He wanted his mommy!
"What is wrong with you today?" Arsene asked as she came in. Her brother babbled mommy over and over. "Oh, good, they're back. Come on, you can get a cuddle," she soothed, taking him out of the crib and walking him to the bedroom door, letting him run inside. He grunted something that sounded suspiciously like 'titties' as he climbed up but both girls ignored it and left him there.
Lupin walked in later that evening, finding a nursing Fred, a nursing Sarah, and a Goemon taking pictures. "What are you doing?" he asked, snatching the camera. "They're too old for that!"
"It's cute," Goemon pointed out. "They attacked the mommy as soon as she reappeared. I've already had to remove Kenji and Alex, who were trying the same thing. Those two reappeared. Thankfully Yu can't walk yet." He laughed when he saw the dirty look sent at the children. "Come, let's remove them back to their beds. For the moment it's only a pacifier to them." He grabbed Sarah while Lupin got Fred, and they both went back to their cribs. They fussed but the adults didn't care. They closed the nursery door so the toddlers couldn't come help again. Then Goemon went to play with his youngest and Lupin went to play with his wife. He met Jigen in there, frowning at him. "Goemon was taking pictures of Fred and Sarah nursing."
"Both of them?"
Lupin nodded. "He said he had to shoo Alex and Kenji off her too. Maybe the leather tops aren't so bad."
"Yes they are," Jigen reminded him. "They won't stop the kids either."
"Then I guess we'll just have to guard them more firmly," Lupin said, lying down so his head was pillowed on them. Xander still didn't wake up.
"She is living, right?"
"Yeah, she's snoring in my ear," he said with a grin.
"As long as it's your ear, man." Jigen climbed in on her other side, and she dislodged Lupin to roll against his side, then Lupin got to pounce her backside. "You do that nearly as good as the cats."
"I've been studying," he said smugly, one hand protectively over the tender parts he so adored.
Jigen rolled his eyes. "Some days I think you're the same age as Fred, Lupin."
"Am not," he said petulantly.
"That's it, if you can't act like an adult, then you can't go to the topless beaches," Jigen said, sounding exactly like his father to his ears. He groaned and shook his head. "Never mind, that didn't come out of my mouth."
"Sure, Daddy Jigen. Wanna spank me to?" he asked with a wink and a leer.
"Only if you're good and since you haven't been good in recently history....." Jigen smirked back. "I doubt it'll happen this year, Lupin."
"Fine, be that way then. I'll just have to have her spank me."
"She won't do it either," Jigen said smugly.
"I had parents. You?"
Jigen laughed and covered them all so at least some of them could sleep.
TO BE CONTINUED....
To Part 38