Xander looked at Wade.  "One last topic for the trip."  Wade nodded, Xander had been bringing up topics for thought for the last week.  He was excited but trying to help them make plans.  "What's my hormones doing during this trip?"

Wade winced.  "That's a very good question."  Xander grinned.  "We can't keep Wolfe.   Let me get in touch with a few people."

"Jensen suggested I go talk to some of the retired spooks and commandos."

"Not many of them would play with you the way you needed.  They might know of someone though.  I'll do that."  Xander nodded and beamed.  "Do we think we can handle it with only *one*?"

"If not, we'll look like a traveling gay harem."

"Good point.  I'll get someone with some phenomenal stamina then."  He got up and walked off, going to the former/retired commando bar to talk to the people there.  They hated him but it was for Xander so they'd talk to him this time.  He hoped.  If not, he'd send Xander to the spook bar.


Xander walked into the spook bar that night, grinning at a few people.  "I need advice," he said.  "And a name."  They moaned.  "For the trip."  A few choked.  "Yeah, kinda."  He sat down with the people he knew.  "Sam, someone at Wade's hangout said that you may know of someone?  Hopefully they're good, slightly protective, are street smart, blend in somewhat?"

"I know a few but I don't know of any gay ones, kid."  He considered it, calling someone.  "Harris needs someone to travel with him.  Is Wade going?"

"Yup.  He's handling the full security details.  Though they mostly answer to Clay.  This would be an extra, hidden guard and someone I can talk to, sightsee with, keep me worn out.  All that."

Sam repeated that and hummed.  "That's a really good idea actually.  Yeah, they want him to go with someone with some training."

Someone new walked in.  "Harris, how did you get CIA access?" they demanded.

Xander grinned.  "Someone made me one."

They all groaned, Sam shaking his head too.  "How high?"

"He has AD access," the new guy said dryly.

Fiona looked over.  "Is that how you got the slutty tart's file so screwed up?  They nearly sent her to retraining for that."  Xander beamed.  "Nice work then."  She got back to her card game.

Sam looked at him.  "That was truly mean but very nice to watch.  We all hated her anyway."  He went back to making notes.  He put the phone against his shoulder.  "The people I'm talking to have heard...rumors about why you're no longer allowed out of Miami without an escort.  Something about a meeting with Gibbs, Wade, Clay, Horatio...  Some lab work?"

Xander nodded.  "There was one of those, yes, but I'm not allowed to talk about it and if anyone finds out Gibbs has given me permission to make them fucking miserable."

Sam grinned.  "Good!  We like that!"  He told them that answer.  "Nine?" he demanded, looking at him.

Xander looked at him.  "Which one did they hack?"

"They got Greg under truth serum when they were rescuing him last time and asked him about you."

"Oh."  He grimaced.  "They're not the sort to tell, right?"

"No, they'd never do that.  A few years back your rescue led them to rescuing his former teammates."  He went back to talking.  They came up with a company name.  He hung up after a quiet 'thank you'.  "No favors needed.  Maybe you'll find someone nice."  He handed it over.  "They're mostly former military.  So they can be protective and quiet about things.  Most of them are really pretty.  Some got busted for DADT breaking.  Some got busted for other minor things.  They will not talk to Wade but they'll talk to Clay."  He grinned.  "Though I did tell them that Wade had mellowed a lot and only killed for his girlfriend's pleasure.  They thought he only did turtles."

"One of the people on the traveling security team thought goats."  Sam snickered, nodding.  "Thank you."

"Welcome, kid.  More than most, we want you very safe when you're overseas.  How is the itinerary looking?"

"We start at Mardi Gras, go to a few cities in India, then Thailand, Japan, the Great Wall, three places in Russia, Jordan, Turkey, Greece, Italy, Cairo and Alexandria, the greatest city in Morocco that I can't remember the name of, Peru for the ruins, Panama with the canal, Argentina, and we end in Brazil at Carnival."

"That's a hell of a trip," Sam said with a grin.  "A full year?"

"Yup," Xander said with a grin.  "Mostly spots everyone should see before they regenerate into a new life or whatever they decide to do for an afterlife."

"Nice planning."  Xander beamed.  "You should probably escape.  The two that tried to scam you are in the back."

"I heard.  I *so* heard and got asked not to take it out of their hides."  He beamed.  "I'm being a good boy today."  He hugged Sam then left.

Sam shook his head.  "He does give good hugs."  Fiona snickered from her seat, shaking her head.

"You send him to Jenris?" Michael asked.

"No, the other company.  Jenris has too many security risks for the kid.  Think about how bad it's going to be if he gets captured overseas."

Michael and a few others shuddered.  "Well, the economy will be helped when people redecorate," Fiona decided.  "And rebuild."

"It has helped in a few other places," another spook admitted.  "Including here when he rescued himself from the South African consulate the other day."  A few moaned and paid off their bets.  "And then the Turkish one."  One crowed as he accepted more money.  "I'd hate to be on their traveling security team."

"Me too," Fiona said.  "They are bringing one female member, just in case she's needed for girlish things."  Another few bets were paid off.  Xander did make money exchange hands.


Wade walked Xander into the meeting area, turning him over to Clay.  "Two of them tried to jack the car with us both in it."  He walked off to get some coffee and calm down.  Xander hadn't let him shoot them because they had hostages already.  That was mean of Xander and Wade was being such a good boy today.

Xander looked at Clay.  "They had officers hostage and were using their cars.  I didn't let him blow them away."

"You should've.  He can do that."

"Who knows how many others there are.  I was going to suggest that he question them in his own special way but Horatio got there too soon."

"That does suck," Clay agreed.  He walked Xander back to the meeting room.  They already had the special incense going.  "Mr. Porter."

"Clay.  And you must be Mr. Harris."

"Xander please," he said, with a smile, shaking his hand.  "I'm actually not all that backed up today.  I was kinda mean to the guys who just tried to take me hostage."  Clay snorted, shaking his head.  Xander sat down.  "So, I'm sure someone's told you how we're traveling and why I need such...stringent help?"

Mr. Porter smiled, rubbing a hand over his bald, pale head.  "I have heard, yes.  Including about the group in the past.  We've guarded a few when we found them somewhere odd during an assignment."  Xander grinned.  "Are you sure you want to bring Wade?"

"Wade's very good at being his assistant and having Wade scares the crap out of a lot of people who'd try for him," Clay pointed out.

"Plus, Wade's.... well he's gotten more humane.  He and his girlfriend only torture succuba and mass murderers anymore.  Though that was my fault since I brought them to Disney."  He shifted in his chair.  Mr. Porter was giving Clay a horrified look.  Xander beamed.  "Sometimes the meanness comes."

"I'm sure it does."  He handed over a binder.  "This is our stable of escorts.  Find a few you like the looks of and we'll talk about their skills."

Xander looked at the book then at him.  "I'm not stuck on looks.  Personality I'm stuck on.  I tend to babble, especially when I'm thinking or seeing new things.  So I'd like them to be a bit tolerant with that and my crazy suitors."  He threw a knife at a wall and the demon hiding there died.  Still holding the jewelry box too.  He grinned at the shocked looking guy.  "I'd like them to be street smart enough not to get us into trouble when we're traveling but gushy enough that it doesn't look like they're my daddy figure.  I'd like them to like to talk to me.  Treat me nicely.  I don't want to be the one in charge if that makes sense."

"I'm told all people with your hormone condition were trained as concubines in the old days."

Xander nodded.  "We were.  I can alpha dog with the best of them, but I'd rather be able to treat this like a somewhat normal of a relationship, even if I am paying them sinful amounts of money to go with me."

"Someone nice, decent, likes gay sex," Clay said.  "Because they'll need to be having it a lot."

"Like daily?" Mr. Porter asked with a smile.  "I'm sure they can keep up."

Clay looked at him.  "Did we forget to mention he's a level ten?"  Mr. Porter shook his head.  "He was wearing out two boyfriends who never seemed to have time off.  Recently he's been exhausting someone in the lab and one of my guys occasionally gets to be tired.  Jensen's the only one that's ever worn out Xander by himself and gotten him fully out of backlog."

"So probably at least twice a day.  Would you mind someone more...effeminate?"

Xander shrugged.  "As long as it won't get us bothered by someone?  I don't care.  We'd like to be kind of a quiet touring group without attention."

"I can fully understand that."  He smiled.  "Let me talk to some of my best people and we'll start interviewing in a few days.  When are you leaving?"

"We're going to officially kick off the Saturday before Mardi Gras in New Orleans.  Then we're going to India," Xander said with a grin.

"That's not unreasonable.  I'll talk to you at the latest tomorrow, Mr. Harris."  They shook his hand and he left.  It was a very interesting request.  He had no idea why the young man needed security like Wade.  His contacts all agreed that they liked him having Wade and Wade had turned mellow in his old age.  He was even dating!

Xander looked at Clay.  "What if this doesn't work?"

"Then I know two people who got kicked out who'll do it because they want out of the US."

"Like for a job?"

"One, yeah.  But he'll be real attentive and it'll help him.  And he'll keep you out of it."  He patted him on the back.  "Take Wade to sulk somewhere else."

"I'm not sure who called Horatio this morning."

"Pooch probably.  He has our police band scanner."  Xander rolled his eyes but they left.  Wade was gotten from the bar and they went home.  Wade had obviously pouted to beer so Xander let him sort himself out.

Wade stared at him.  "Kid, the waitress tripped at my magnificence and spilled it on me," he said dryly.

"I still can't stand that stench."

"I'll change later."  Xander shrugged and went to check his closet.  "Remember, you can't wear dance clothes around the world," he called after him.  "And you'll have to add in some needs for the pets."

"I know."

"Did Steve deal with the plane reservations?"

"Slightly.  I think he decided to rent one for the whole trip.  So we'll have the plane all to ourselves."  He came back to the doorway to the living room.  "The other's airfare will go toward gas."  He tossed Wade a shirt then went back to his sorting of clothes and deciding what definitely needed to be washed.

Wade shook his head but went upstairs to make sure he didn't stink like stale beer anymore.  The kid really needed to get over that.  At least they had loosened him up enough that he allowed drinking around him now.  He came down when he heard someone knock on the front door.  Not even the occasional kid selling crap in the neighborhood used the front door.  Since they had community guards that cut down on Jehovah's Witnesses and the like.  He glanced out and grimaced.  He opened the door, staring at the man there.  Who did indeed smell like stale beer.  Clearly the kid had a good reason for hating that stink.  "Did you need something?" he asked dryly.

The man stared at him.  "Are you my son-in-law?" he sneered.

Wade smirked.  "No, I'm your son's minion," he said dryly.  "Xander?"

"I don't want to go to jail for assault," he called back.  "And I'm keeping the other things from needing shots for biting him."

Wade looked at the older Harris.  "He said go away."  The man tried to push past him but Wade was very effective in stopping him.  "Do you really think your son wants to see you?  I'm pretty sure him kicking your ass proved he didn't want to."  He sneered at the drunk.  "By the way, I'm sure there's a restraining order somewhere.  If not, I'll be correcting that oversight tomorrow."

"He's my son."

"Who does not want to see you," Wade reminded him.  "So go away."

"He'll see me or I'll burn this pretty house down!" he shouted.

Xander came out with a gun, pointing it at him after checking the clip.  "No you won't."  His father swallowed and backed up.  "I have no desire at all to talk to you.  To see you.  Anything.  I really don't need the flashbacks to being tortured by you," he sneered.  "Now, is there anything else you want to discuss?"

"You're supposed to take care of family," he sneered.

"Only if they're good family," Xander said dryly.  "Which you're not.  Should I even mention that cult?"  His father stomped off.  Xander handed Wade the gun.  "Before I use it."  He walked off, going out to the workshop.  It was the greatest way to wear out his stress.  He came back to the doorway.  "Tell everyone for me please?"  He walked off again.

"Sure," Wade agreed, flicking the safety back on.  He went to talk to the community guards, who weren't in their guard shack.  He found a car impatiently waiting and let them in because they were the mistress of one of the neighbors.  "No idea where they are," he told her when she paused by him.  One came jogging out.  "Bigger problems than Xander's father showing up from jail?" he guessed.

"One of the other families just had the domestic to end everything," he muttered.  "Thanks, Wade."

"Welcome."  He went back to the house, letting the dogs water the lawn then taking them back inside.  He initiated a conference call.  A few were making grumbling noises.  "Shut up, Speed.  Xander's father just showed up."

"Excuse me!" Speed demanded.  "The drunken bastard did what!"

"Wanted support," Wade said dryly.  "Threatened to burn the house if Xander didn't talk to him.  Xander pulled a gun but he didn't use it.  Kept the dogs from biting him too.  He's in the forge."

"Crap," Horatio muttered.

"I'll have things started for a restraining order," Clay noted then hung up.

"We'll be up later to help him finish calming down, then go out to dinner," Speed decided.  "Horatio, want him to babysit while we go out?"

"He can if he wants," Horatio said, sounding happier with that.

"By the way, the guard said there was the mother of all domestics out this way."

"Yeah, I got called to that," Ryan admitted.  "I'm on my way now.  He good?"

"No.  He's in the forge."

"For now, help him calm down," Ryan ordered.  "We'll see him in a few hours."  He hung up after a second of his siren going on.

"I can agree with that and we'll figure out how to make sure that being leaves Miami," Horatio said.  "Thank you, Wade.  I'm being called in to testify."  He hung up.

"Wade, let Xander vent for now," Speed said.  "He'll work it out and then he might start screaming in rage.  We'll be over about six."  He hung up.

Wade hung up on his end and walked out there.  "Speed wanted to know if you wanted to babysit tonight."

"Is it going to be safe?"

"Probably.  If he tries anything you can easily kill him."  Xander nodded that was true, going back to work on the something tiny he was fiddling with.  "Wolfe's at a scene across the neighborhood apparently.  Horatio's in court.  Speed was eating."

"That's cool.  Let me do this and then I'll go sulk in the tub or something."

"Sure."  He went inside and found Pooch pulling in.  "More problems?"

"Need the file on his father.  Someone has ours."

Wade got it from the office and handed it over.  "He's a bit upset."

"I'd be upset too if that shitbag had shown up like that."  He drove off, taking it to Clay.  He knew a judge who'd do a temporary one until they could...convince Xander's father to leave Miami and possibly the US all together.


Jensen found where Xander's father was sulking to a few bottles of beer and walked in, putting the restraining order down in front of him.  Then he hit him, knocking him down.  "That is an official, legal restraining order.  You don't go near your stepson again, shitbag."  He sneered at him.  "The only reason I'm leaving you living is so you can flee Miami.  I'd do it within a day before some of us who like Xander decide you're fun to play with."

"Jensen, aren't you a hacker?" the bartender asked.

Jensen smirked.  "I'm a retired Delta Tech Op," he said proudly.  "I took the same special forces training they did.  I can and have beaten people to death with things I ripped off."  He stared at Xander's father after kicking him on the side.  "Take the hint and leave the US."  He walked off.  "Xander said he leaves or he's handling it, he doesn't want anyone to help."

"Sure," the bartender agreed.  He handed down the restraining order.  "I think you should pay your tab, Mr. Harris."  The bouncers came over to help him do that then find a cab to wherever he was staying.  He looked at a back table, who had people still at it.  "I heard they nearly arrested the kid for kicking his ass when he showed up."

"Yeah, then the cult his father started showed up at the station to kidnap him again," one of them said dryly.  "Which let them let Xander go and keep his dirtbag stepfather and the cult."  He looked over.  "I'm not taking Xander's or Wade's fun.  Wade hasn't tortured in months.  He's probably jonsing for it."  That got a few quiet snickers from his table.

The bartender nodded and called a few other lowkey bars to make sure that the dirtbag wouldn't be let in.  None of them wanted to clean up the bloodshed when he was killed.  Or have to shut down for the crime scene people to remove all the pieces.


Anya looked up from her grocery shopping, making herself not sneer.  "Mr. Harris.  What are you doing out of jail?"

"You were the last and best girl my son dated.  I'd like your help straightening him out."

She stared at him, still trying to hold in the sneer.  "Xander was bisexual when he was with me.  I'm the one that made him realize that."  He gaped.  "Besides, I'm dating his assistant Wade now.  I'm very happy with Wade.  Wade likes to torture succuba with me."  She smirked.  "Xander was much too *nice* for my needs, Mr. Harris.  I like Xander how he is.  Hair and all."  She stepped closer.  "Beyond that, if you don't leave Miami I'm going to make you miserable as only a former vengeance demon can do.

"I know *all* sorts of ways to make you sorry as hell you tried to get near your son again," she sneered.  "I've seen some of the happiest making atrocities of the world going on and watched it like it was _Titanic_."  He shuddered and stepped back.  "Get out of my adopted city before my boyfriend has to cheer me on.  He hasn't heard my cheerleader fantasy yet."  He turned and fled.

She sneered, watching him go.  "Maybe I'll work on that later."  She went back to picking out fruit for dinner.  A few other shoppers were giving her worried looks so she smiled.  "He kidnaped his son and started a cult to him while torturing him.  Even some of the police officers want to rend him into fat for candles."  They nodded and walked off.  She hummed happily as she moved to the meat department.  An officer walked over to her.  She smiled.  "Xander's father showed up to get me to help him capture his son so he could torture him some more with his cult."

He winced.  "That's sucky.  You threatened to kill him?"

"No, I made sure he knew I used to torture beings for happies and orgasms."  She beamed.  "I *am* formerly a vengeance demon, the one for women scorned.  I have all sorts of ideas I never got to use."

He nodded.  "You and Wade must be very happy together."

She laughed.  "He thought I was a bit mean a few times way back when but otherwise usually.  He gives me great orgasms and spoils me when I need it."  She added some pork chops to her basket.  "Did Xander's father go for a run?"

"Hopefully," he decided.  "Can you maybe not talk about torture when there's kids around, please?"

She pinched him on the cheek.  "I don't like kids."  She walked off.  "Aren't you glad I let Toby be adopted?"

"Very," he decided.  "Thank you, miss."  He went to tell his boss then go to confession.  She had liked him a bit too much so he must be slipping toward evil again.


Don Cheva hung up and looked at his phone then his second-in-command.  "Anya used to torture people?"

"Anya was the vengeance demon women called on when their men cheated or beat them, Don Cheva."  He smirked.  "She was that for over a thousand years."

"Huh.  I didn't know that.  I thought Wade was the scary one in that group around Xander."

"Actually, I've always considered Xander scarier.  You never know what he'll pull.  Wade and Anya are predictable; they'll torture and then have sex.  Xander....  He might torture, he might be merciful and just kill you.  He might hormone you and let you be arrested so you can be put in general population.  There's rumors that one boy pro tried to touch what was his so he hormoned him and sent him into a gaybasher's event, where nearly everyone tried to have him but hated themselves for it."  Don Cheva shuddered.  "I'm sure Xander got plenty of bad ideas when he was dating Anya, plus he does have that small hunting history.  It's the same thing that makes the Winchesters turn cold and cruel at times."

"Good point.  I didn't realize the Lieutenant wasn't the scariest member out there beyond Wade."

"Caine has his moments but even he's tried to get Xander calmed down."  He smiled.  "Did something happen around Anya?"

"Xander's father tried to get her to help him with whatever plan he has."

He called Wade's phone.  "We have just found out how very mean and evil your girlfriend says she can be thanks to your boss's father asking her for help, Wade."

"In the supermarket."

"In the supermarket."  He smiled.  "He said thank you, Don Cheva.  No, just a head's up, Wade.  We're rearranging who we think is the scariest in the family.  It used to be Xander, you, then Caine.  Now we're not so sure."  He smiled.  "Because you're predictable in what you'll do, Xander is not.  Think about what he has done and could do, Wade.  Do you consider him scarier?"  He smiled as he hung up.  "He didn't think about that either."

"Xander does like to stay in goofy husband mode."

"It's usually nicer for all of us if he's in goofy husband mode."  Don Cheva laughed but nodded he agreed.  "Plus we keep more money from poker games."  He got back to work on their plans for the day.


Wade looked at his phone then at the others meeting.  "They used to consider me second scariest in the family."

"Behind Horatio?" Clay guessed.

"No, he's after me.  After Xander.  Apparently Anya took my scary spot though."  He called her.  "What happened?"  He listened, nodding.  "Yeah, that's a good reason.   No, I don't want to hear about your cheerleader fantasy if you do decide to torture him, Anya.  Please don't.  I'd have to kill myself."  He hung up and shook his head quickly to clear it.  "Clearly she got bad mental images from Xander."

Speed looked at him with an evil smirk.  "Back when we still had Cordelia, they got into a Xander debate in the station about costumes.  We had bad mental images of pirate Xander, cowboy Xander, and even Tarzan Xander.  He decided on George of the Jungle instead."

Wade moaned, rubbing his head.  "Ow.  So that's what a stroke feels like."

"Yup, we had that too," Speed quipped.  He patted him on the arm.  "It'll be okay, Wade.  We took them all from him."

"Thank you, Ares," he muttered, cracking Speed up.

"Thanks for reminding me I needed to find those for him," Strife called.  "There's a costume party for a children's charity in two weeks."

"Crap," Speed muttered.  He texted that to his spouse so they'd all be warned to have plenty of tylenol on hand.

Wade looked at him.  "He doesn't have enough definition for George or Tarzan anymore.  Thankfully."

"Think he can fix that in two weeks?"


"Wonder what he'll go as then."  They settled in to talk about what to do while Xander was gone for the year.  And about other family topics.  First birthdays were quickly approaching.


Sam looked up when Xander got the email and tipped his head to reread it.  "Something huge?"

"Children's charity throwing a costume fundraiser."

"That's a good thing and you can get some naughty urges out," Sam said with a grin.

"They hid all the good costumes on me and I need to do a lot of situps to go as George."

Sam considered that image, then shook his head quickly.  "Go in something less skimpy so no one says you're being too flirty or uncovered if there's kids there."

"Hmm.  Pirate?  We used to joke about me taking things out of the bank and carrying around trunks."

"Maybe.  There's those movies."

"Hmm."  He went to look in his closet.  "I need a shirt," he decided.  "C'mon, Sam."

"Sure."  They headed out together.  Dean and the puppies were napping on the other end of the couch.  They loved to nap and drool on Dean.


Anya walked into the house shaking and shivering, going right to Wade.  "I'm breaking my allotment for the day."  She stripped and got his pants undone enough so she could climb on and make herself happy.

"Not that I mind," he quipped, putting the laptop he was video conferencing on aside.  "Why are you so horny this time?"

"Gay, leather, pirate Xander."  She worked herself faster.  It didn't take that long.  She sighed in pleasure and kissed him then walked off to take a long bubble bath with her toys.  She needed her toys.

Wade shook his head, cleaning himself up and fixing his pants.  "I'll ask later," he decided.  His former fellow minion snickered.  He sent Xander a text message to send him a picture.  So Xander did and it was hot.  The leather pants did great things for Xander's ass and legs.  The vest did nice things for his chest too.  The poet shirt underneath was nice and flowy.  It went well with the hair and the hat.  He sent that over to his former coworker, earning a moan.  "I guess I know why."  Xander sent over another one and a 'which do you like better'.  He stared and sent that one too.  His coworker signed off to take care of that matter.  Wade went to pull Anya away from her vibrator and pay her back for working him up and leaving him hanging.  He needed to make sure his stamina was top level so he could follow Xander around the world.


Speed got the two pictures and stared then sent back his opinion before going to find his husband.  Unfortunately the police commissioner was in there nagging.  He smiled at him.  That made the man nearly flee because apparently Speed looked evil.  Horatio gave him an odd look so he put the pictures up for him before going to his knees to give his husband a great blow job.

Horatio moaned as he looked at the pictures.  "He's got to have some help with his backed up state."  He whimpered and leaned back so Speed had more room to work.  "Leave some so I can help your dirty mind, Timmy."  He ran a hand through the messy hair and let his husband do whatever he wanted.  Then he'd make him just as tired and sweaty.


Jensen bounced in that night, grinning at Clay.  "What?"

"How much did you help with that costume?" Clay asked.

"I had him change completely from the first one because he looked like an extra from a pirate porno movie."  He beamed.  "Why?"

"Apparently he hormoned some people via picture," Jolene said from her doorway.

"You're welcome," Jensen quipped, going up to his own apartment so he could make himself dinner.

She nodded.  "Pooch definitely needed the nap."  She went back to taking care of her boys.

Clay shook his head quickly.  "I don't want to know!"  He went out to find his own piece of volatile fun for the night.  Maybe if he was lucky it'd be two volatile women who wanted fun.


Ryan walked in and paused, staring at Xander.  "Why are you in leather?"

"We're making sure I can stand this as a costume for the charity thing in a few weeks."  He took a kiss.

"Huh.  I hadn't heard there was one."  He took another kiss and then the spoon from his hand.  He checked and turned it off.

"That's the last of the stuff, Ryan."  He turned it back on.  "I'll pounce you later.  Go eat so you don't pass out or die?"

"Yeah, I think I should."  He got his own dinner and let Xander finish making caramel.  He even got seconds because he'd obviously need the energy.  "Aren't those some of your special leathers?  Will Ares get mad if you wear them as a costume?"

Ares appeared, giving him a dirty look.  "Nice try, Wolfe."  He patted him on the head.  He looked Xander over and mentally groaned.  "I remember the last time you wore those you walked past the training class and made them all distracted."  Xander grinned, pouring the caramel into the dish he wanted and covering it then coming out to kiss him.  He hummed, looking down at him.  "What are you going as?"

"A pirate?" he guessed with a grin.

"Need something to make sure you look like a pirate."

"I'll have a cutlass.  I found good boots earlier too.  Plus a cheesy pirate hat."

"That'll help."  He took another kiss then backed off shaking his head.  "You're dangerous."

Xander grinned.  "You helped train me to be dangerous."

"Yes I did."  He went home before he decided to save Wolfe's stamina for the night.  He wasn't sure he could keep up with Xander at the moment.  Wolfe really needed a day off.

Xander smirked at Ryan, who finished his last bite of dinner.  "Is it that bad?"

"Xander, you just made Ares act like Cupid," Ryan said.  "I don't think it's *bad* the way you think it is."  Xander grinned.  "C'mon, shower with me?"  Xander nodded, stripping off and following him into the bedroom and attached bathroom.

Dean came down the stairs, tossing the clothes into the bedroom.  "That poor guy," he muttered, getting a snack and going back upstairs.  Ryan was already moaning with a hint of squeal.  "That poor sucker.  He hasn't learned not to let Xander get him off first?  If you do that you end up working harder and stopping too soon."  He locked his bedroom door.  Ramses had somehow figured out the lever-action doorknobs last night.  He had woken up being a drool pillow.  Let Sam be drooled on.  He heard Sam whistle and the dogs came running up to cuddle and play with him.  "You need some of that too, Sammy."

"I got some yesterday, Dean."


Sam shook his head, playing another round of fetch with the dogs.  Ryan wouldn't want them helping them have sex so he'd distract them.


Dean and Sam came down to make themselves breakfast and found Xander stretching and working out in the living room.  Sam walked past Dean, still in a pre-coffee haze.  Dean was a bit more awake.  He stared with the dogs, who were giving daddy funny looks.  Dean grimaced.  Xander was slinky.  That was a bad thing.  "Xander?" he asked, making him jump.  Xander blinked at him.  "Did you die or something?"

"No.  Why?"

"Because you look slinky."

"I think that's part of the striptease exercise program," Xander said, looking confused.

"No, I've seen you full out strip before, Xander.  You weren't that slinky then."  Xander grimaced but shrugged and got back to it.

Sam came out and stared.  He looked at Dean, who shook his head. "Are you sure you didn't die, Xander?  The coffee tastes kinda like hormones."

Xander glared.  "Bite me, Sam."

Sam walked over to hug him, getting a huff back.  "You're so backed up," he teased.  Xander elbowed him.  "Was Ryan that pitiful?  We can go out and maybe you can find someone."


"Beach day.  We need a beach day," Dean decided before Xander got mad at Sam.  Xander might make them find their own space then.  Or quit teaching them.  They might even have to leave Miami and that would make Sammy pout for centuries.  "Get showered and put on something, we'll go play in the waves."

"It's not safe for me to go out," Xander said, still looking pissed off.

Sam looked at Xander, then kissed him and moved closer to trap him against the pole.  Xander moaned and clutched at Sam's hips as he rubbed against him.  Xander finally moaned and Sam quit kissing him to nibble on his throat.  "We'll go tease on the beach," he hissed in his ear.  "Make all the young things that think they're hot jealous."  Xander moaned and shifted.  "Maybe we'll even pick you up a nice date?"  He grinned at Xander, taking another kiss.  "Go shower, get clean and pretty for the beach."  Xander nodded, taking another kiss.  "Dean can even drive and be our guard today since no one would hit on him anyway.  He's too old for young and pretty like the beach people like."

Dean snorted.  "I get plenty, Sammy.  You're the one that can't get hit on in the clubs."  Xander shook his head but went to take a shower.  Dean and Sam shared a look.  Sam went up to shower and change.  Dean did the same and then made them a pack for snacks.  They could eat on the beach.  Dean even packed a bag of real clothes in case they needed them.  He fed the dogs, left Wade a text message, and then they were gone.


Wade snapped awake when his phone vibrated under his pillow, looking at the message.  //Cured Xander's backed up problem.  At beach.//  He moaned and got up to shower, change, and check on the trio.  With their luck they'd all be stolen together again.  Wade went to hang out and watch.  The boys were playing in the surf.  Two of the nearby thugs were watching their girls frolic and watching the trio frolic.  Wade stared, watching Xander play.  "He needs to start doing PT again."

Someone sat beside him, looking at him.  "Xander's looking soft and like a husband again instead of a boytoy."

Wade nodded.  "Yeah, which means he might be taken for a bit."

"Good point," Eric said.  "Is he good?"

"No.  Did Wolfe show up and die this morning?"

"Alexx is letting him recover in her office.  He *still* hasn't come back and it's been two hours."

"Did something happen to his neck?"

"No, he walked in, went up to Horatio's office, said 'I'm so sorry I failed' and then died.  Woke up an hour later, died again, woke up ten minutes later and then died again.  So Alexx is letting him do what needs to be done in her office."

"I've got to help the kid find someone worthy of his stamina.  Maybe another commando."

Eric nodded.  "Might help.  Horatio is scowling this morning."

"Not his fault."

"We know.  I think Speed has PMS so Horatio's in a bad mood."  Wade snorted, shaking his head.  Eric looked out there, wincing.  "Xander's missing."  They disappeared with Xander's things too.


Horatio got told they were taken by one of the thugs on the beach. "Damn it, we do not need this today!"  He found the stone to summon the DPP officer, getting one that looked apologetic.  "Who has them this time?"

"One of his rivals on the council who wants to consolidate."  Horatio growled.  "We can't get there, Lieutenant.  They've got it locked down.  No one can get there.  Even his Gods can't get there.  Otherwise I'd ask."

"Ryan's worn out," he said dryly.

"I figured he was.  It'd be stupid to steal them on a day when he was in good health to rescue them."  Horatio grimaced but nodded.  "As soon as we can we'll go rescue them but right now it's locked to us.  It may take a few days."  He disappeared.  He had to gather a rescue party.

Horatio went to tell the others.  This was a very bad time to do this.  Not that Xander wouldn't protect everyone.  He paged Eric when he didn't find him but heard his phone in the office.  Wade's as well.  That was a bad sign.  "Bad news," he told the team when they gathered.

"Xander got taken?" Ryan asked, looking exhausted.  Horatio nodded.  "Damn it!"

"One of his rivals on the Council and the DPP can't get onto their realm at all right now."

"Damn it," Ryan muttered.

"It may also be that Wade, Eric, and Dean and Sam are gone."

"Why take Eric?" Calleigh complained.

"He was with the group probably," Horatio told her.  "They will come back as soon as they can."

"And probably need a day off or so to recover," she countered.  He nodded that was true.

Ryan looked at her.  "I needed more than a day."  She slumped down.  "Who's getting Eric's cases?"

"For now we'll split them," Speed said.  "I've only got one open."  Horatio smiled at him for that.  They got into the cases and made plans to cover the missing tech's shift.  Horatio remembered to tell Clay during the meeting.


It was three days later when the group reappeared at Jensen's apartment.  Without Eric.  Jensen speeddialed Horatio.  "They're mostly back.  Xander, anyone, medical?"  Xander growled.

"It was his choice," Wade said calmly.

"There's no way she's not going to be destroyed."

"You did a good bit of that already," Sam quipped, getting swatted by Wade.

Jensen got up and walked over, making Xander look at him.  "Are you okay?"

"She kept Eric."

"Eric volunteered to be kept so we could be let go," Wade told him.

"I'm still going to destroy her."

"Sure," Wade agreed.  "We can do that.  She's got ties to some major drug dealers too."

"Good!"  Xander got free of Jensen.  "I'm fine."

Jensen pulled him into his arms, hugging him.  "We were so worried."  Xander shivered. Clay knocked then walked in.  "Do we need medical or just help destroying her so she gives Eric back?"

Xander shook his head.  "I can destroy them a whole lot."

"Okay."  He looked at Wade.  "You?"

"I'm a bit...pissed off.  Xander protected us very well and the few I got to take out were more scared of him."

Xander looked at him.  "I didn't mean to make you feel less than macho, Wade."

"You didn't," he said dryly, swatting him.  He calmed himself down.  "Anya?"

"Pouting you got taken too, and vowed that she'd go ruin them herself for daring to touch you," Jensen said with a grin.

"Good!"  He looked at Xander.  "Let's go to my place.  Did someone watch the pets?"  Clay nodded, pointing at Jolene since she was in the doorway.

"Thank you," Xander said quietly.  "Why yours?" he asked Wade.

"I have access to more information there."

"I can link yours to his," Jensen said.  "His is more protected with wards."  Wade nodded that was true and they got sent home.

One of the DPP officers was waiting, bowing to Xander.  "We have seen the immortal that gave himself up.  He is still alive."  Xander relaxed and nodded.  "He does not look pleased."

"Does she still have him?" Wade asked.  The officer nodded.  "Thank you."

"You're most welcome."  He disappeared.

Xander sat down to pet the dogs and finish calming down.  Others started to show up but Jensen was hooking the three information systems together.  Wade had his former minions to contact.  Xander had some of his contacts.  Jensen had theirs.  They'd find Eric, rescue him, and then help him heal.

Horatio walked into the chaos of getting information.  "I take it they kept Eric?"

"He volunteered," Wade told him.

"Eric can be noble that way."  He looked at Xander, leaning down to pet him like he was Kiss.  "Are you all right?" he asked gently.  Xander looked up and nodded.  "Beyond being pissed off?"

"I'm going to rescue him."

"I'm sure he'd appreciate that."  He kissed him on the head.  "Let some of us help, Xander."

"We will."  They got information on the pipeline, her contacts, and all about her home realm.  They were not happy that she had made that move.


Horatio walked around the room full of demons.  A few gave him odd looks so he smiled.  "I was invited by a Council member that wanted to talk about some of their people in my city," he told one, getting a nod back.  That was reasonable to them.  He got into position, waiting on the bitch to show up with his CSI.

Wade walked in behind Xander and Sam.  Dean was behind him because a demon had tried to pounce him and Dean had to punch him.  Xander got something to drink and said something quietly to Wade so he wouldn't get the super strong stuff that looked like champagne.  Or the body fluid.  They mixed and got into a better position.  They were distraction and only distraction.   Clay and Cougar were in another position, had been for the whole day.  They were being...entertaining.  When she walked in, Xander was chatting with another council member.  Xander sneered at her.  "You've heard that her human contacts got ruined?" he asked casually.

The demon councilor stared at him.  "I hadn't."

Xander smiled.  "She pissed me off."  The demon winced.  "Oh, so much worse.  All her little cartel people are in real trouble."  He got another drink and sniffed then took a drink.  It was the harder stuff but he liked the taste.  "So maybe we'll have to hold another election."

"Those always cause problems," the councilor complained.  Xander looked at him.  "Though if she's running drugs to humans...."  Xander leaned over to whisper in his ear, getting a horrified look.  "That's her clan?" he demanded.

"Or her friends.  She *favors* the head one.  By the way, the DPP know about him."  He smirked.

"Awww, you came up to play with us again, outside your station," the demon in question sneered.

Xander turned and shoved his self defense dagger into her eye, killing her.  "Why yes, I am.  After all it's my seat."  He smirked.  He pulled his knife out and wiped it off on her shirt.  "People, did the flesh eaters want a snack?  Even though she's not worthy of that honor?"  They grimaced and shook their heads.  The guards took her to toss her into the desert.  That was a great insult to the death.

Horatio had spotted Eric when they walked in and got a waiter to hand him a drink.  Eric spotted his hair, he knew he had.  So when he and Clay moved closer, Eric didn't resist, just hugged them once they were out of harm's way.  Jensen and the others would follow.  Horatio got them back to Xander's house and Eric went to shower and shake in peace and quiet.  Horatio followed, giving him some of Xander's sweats.  "Do you need medical attention or to talk?" he asked quietly.

"H.... "  He swallowed.  "I feel really sorry that they want Xander to do that."  Horatio hugged him.  Eric calmed himself down.  "Is Xander all right?"

"He'll be right back.  He was distracting her."  Eric nodded, getting into the shower.  Horatio stayed with him to make sure he was all right.

Xander showed up with the others.  He went to check on Eric, giving him a hug.  "Are you all right?  You shouldn't have let her keep you."

"I'm fine, Xander.  Quit fussing.  I knew you'd come for me."

"I'm sorry it took so long."

Eric shrugged.  "It'll be okay."  Xander looked at him.  "Now I realize what a sucky future it is if they capture you."

"Did she...."  He nodded.  "Because I know it hurts when it grows back.  The monsoon demon did it to me."

"She started to but then noticed the healing."  He shrugged.

Xander hugged him then walked off.  "You need real food so you can go talk to Horatio in your room so you can calm down."

"Thanks."  Eric relaxed and went back to his shower.  He got dressed and let Horatio walk him upstairs to a room for the night.  Aiden was waiting and tucked him in.  Xander brought him some cheese and tomato soup and garlic brushed grilled tortillas then left them alone.  Aiden helped him calm down and fussed over him while Horatio waited and made sure he'd be fine.  They could talk after Eric rested.


Horatio came back to work the next day, finding his boss waiting.  "CSI Delko was rescued.  He's resting at Xander's and calming himself down."

"Will he need therapy?  I can only guess what someone who wanted Harris would do to Delko."

"I've spent the last day helping him with that.  He's back on good mental standing."

"Good.  The ...being who did it?"

"She is now dead.  Xander admitted that when she approached him he killed her.  They desecrated her corpse and tossed her out into a desert to rot.  Apparently it's a horrible insult to her people."

"Excellent."  He smiled.  "Let me know if he needs more hours."

"I will.  He thinks he can come back tomorrow.  Mostly because people are fussing at him."

"Friends and family can do that."  He left him alone, nodding at Speedle and their daughter.  "She's very pretty today."

"She missed Daddy last night."  He grinned.  "Her Auntie Calleigh bought her the dress."  He walked her upstairs, letting her squeal and try to pounce Horatio.

He caught her, taking her to cuddle.  "I missed you too, Mellie.  Daddy loves you."  He kissed her on the head.  "You look very pretty today.  Did Daddy Timmy dress you up to come visiting?"

"She's outgrown most everything else."

"Eric would love someone to fuss less."

"I think we can do that.  Want to see Uncle Xander?"  She squealed and patted her daddy, slobbering on his neck.  He cuddled her.  Speed took her when she was asleep, winking before walking off.  He drove them to Xander's, finding Xander in the kitchen.  "I need help."

"Why?" he asked, cooing at Mellie.  "She's so adorable!  We need pictures."

"We did some yesterday but that's the only thing that fits her.  It barely fits her."

"We can go baby clothes shopping.  Does Adam need to go too?"

"Probably if Toby's growing like Mellie."  He nodded at Wade, who smirked.  "I need help baby shopping."  Wade handed over the wallet and walked off.  "Thanks."  They called Adam to get ready.  Xander let Sam finish his own lunch while they went out to the SUV to pick up Adam and go shopping.  The shopkeeper at the baby store gave them an awed look when they got out of the SUV.  Speed grinned.  "She's outgrown everything but the dress and it's tight."

"Sure, we have a lot of baby clothes," she said, smiling and waving at the now awake kids.  "Hi, kids."  She took them to the various racks.  Speed knew what size the dress was.  They got the next size up.  After they paid, they went to the baby shop up the street to do it again.  Xander took the bags to drop them off in the SUV.  And refill the parking meter.  They did it with the one a bit further up the street then Xander drove them to lunch.  The kids squealed at the kid friendly restaurant.  They had kid food there and places for babies to sit and stare at things.  Including a huge fish tank full of very colorful tropical fish.  Both the kids loved that.


Eric looked up as Sam brought him something for lunch.  "No Xander fussing?" he asked with a grin.

"The kids needed new clothes."

"Thank you," he mouthed.  Sam grinned.  "Nice lunch, Sam."

"Welcome."  He left him alone.  "We're in the living room when you're ready to come down."

"Sure."  He brought down his lunch to eat in front of the tv with Sam and Dean.  He ate and relaxed again.  Xander hadn't exactly hovered but he had been there whenever Eric had needed something.  So had Aiden.  It was quieter fussing than his parents did.  It was also unnerving.  So maybe he'd go home for a few days of quiet.  He could show up for dinner and things.  He looked at the boys who were smirking at him.  "Let me go home and check it over."

"He'll expect you for dinner by tomorrow night."

"I can do that," Eric agreed.  He put his plate in the dishwasher then called a cab so he could go home.  Aiden was off doing Aiden things in New York for someone.  She had left last night.  So he was blissfully alone.  Even though the silence got to him within minutes he could handle this and just show up for dinner.  He was sure Xander would understand.


Wade responded to the emergency code from Speed's phone, along with Horatio.  They got there at the same time to see some older white gentleman trying to pressure Speed to take a gift.  Wade cleared his throat.  "I don't think any of the adults need anything, sir."

The man sneered at him.  "I don't want the parents, young man.  I'm looking for my next wife and am willing to raise her."

"Hell no," Wade assured him firmly.  "There's no way you'll get near those children.  No matter who you are, what you own, whatever.  I'm probably worth more," he said when the sneering started.  "If not, the one with the hair certainly is."

"His sort shouldn't be near children anyway."

Xander snorted.  "I'd never hurt either of my godchildren, unlike you."  Horatio walked over.  "Horatio, this elderly fool wants your daughter as his future wife."

"I believe he has the wrong idea of what we consider acceptable in Miami."

The older man sneered.  "I will have what I want and no one can stop me."  Horatio held up his badge.  "So?  I can call your supervisor."

"Oh, let me," Xander offered.  "Hey, Doug, are you on detail today?" he called.  "Bill needs to talk to him about his complaint."  The officer nodded and pointed inside.  "You can talk to one of the city council members.  He'd be able to tell where our very nice police commissioner William is."  The council member walked over looking interested.  "He wanted to make a complaint about our beloved Lieutenant protecting his daughter from him wanting her as a future wife."

Bill looked at him with a sneer.  "If you come near Horatio's daughter again I'll let Xander ruin you.  He does so enjoy ruining fools.  Sergeant Speedle, are you all right?"

"She outgrew everything."  He smiled.  "When did I go up?  I thought there was someone in front of me for promotion."

"There was but he retired before Internal Affairs found out about his three mistresses."

"So Toddy Myers didn't pay up and someone he owed decided to tell?" Xander asked dryly.  The council member smiled and nodded.  "Well, congrats, Speed!"  He hugged him and the baby.  "You should congratulate the Speed too, dear."  She smiled and patted her father on the cheek.

"That's a good congrats, dear."  The commissioner and the mayor walked over.  "Sir."

"Speedle, Caine, Wade, Xander."  He nodded at the others.  "Problems?"

"This idiot believes that he can claim my daughter as his future wife against our wills," Speed said with a grin.

"People like them shouldn't be near innocent children, they might ruin them."

Xander hit him, knocking him down.  "You insinuate that I'd hurt these kids again and I'll torture your ass and make you beg to commit suicide for my pleasure," he sneered.  The man gave him a horrified look.  He smirked.  "By the way, I'm a combat veteran, sir.  I'm *very* well trained in explosives, all sorts of weapons, and knives."  The man got up and backed away from him.  "Go.  Away."

"I believe that since he's trying to capture a young child he should probably be arrested," the police commissioner said.  "Officer," he told the council member's guard.  "Since you're not involved."

"Yes, sir, I can do that."  He called for a ride and pulled out his cuffs.  The man tried to huff off but Wade smacked him back down, making him mewl as he hit the concrete.  "Thank you, Wade."

"Not a problem," he said, looking at Xander.  "We do have to finish upping your bomb skills, don't we."  Xander nodded with a grin.  "That'll give you something to do while traveling."  Xander nodded and they got the idiot arrested and carted off in the car that pulled up for him.  The officer gave them the reason and they nodded.  They'd do the booking slips.

The commissioner smiled at Xander.  "We'll miss your helpful nature when you're traveling for a year."

Xander grinned.  "Want postcards?"

"No, I'll look at the pictures when you get back."

"We need a camera.  I don't have one," Xander told Wade, who nodded.

"We can find one in a few minutes," Speed said.  "Thank you, guys."  They all smirked.  "Did I really go up?"  The commissioner nodded.  "Is that going to cause me to leave the lab?"

"I'll kill them," Horatio said dryly.  "So would Alexx if she couldn't nag you to eat every few hours."  He took his daughter, giving her a hug.  "Have you had a good day shopping?"

"We had a great day and the restaurant has a huge fish tank they fell in love with," Adam said from the doorway.  "We should get out of notice before we draw press people."

"Probably too late," Wade admitted, nodding at one.  The group broke apart and headed in different directions.  Xander had a parking ticket but he handed it to Horatio with a few bills.  Then they drove them off to play at the house.  Wade followed.

"Find out who he was and tell us, Caine," the mayor said.  "That way we're aware of which evil corporation he runs."

"I will be doing that in a few minutes."  He walked off, putting on his sunglasses.

"Lieutenant, what sort of standoff was it?" the reporter demanded.

"Someone had the mistaken idea that he could request our daughter as his future wife.  He was proven mistaken."  He got into the hummer and drove back to the station the man had been taken to.  "Who is he?"  The booking slips were handed over.  He made note and told Jensen so he could tell him.  Jensen sent back a dossier a few minutes later.  "Interesting."  He went to tell the commissioner who he was.


Clay got handed the printed dossier from Jensen.  "Another one who wanted Xander?" he quipped.


"Excuse me?" he demanded.

Jensen grinned.  "He wanted to save her from the gay daddy influence and make her his future wife."

"Hell no!" Clay said.  He walked off calling someone.  "General, Franklin Clay.  I have information you may want about your competitor."  He smirked as he read off the name.  "No, sir, he's been arrested here in Miami for wanting an officer's baby daughter.  She's about ten months old and he wanted a future wife."  He smirked harder.  "I thought you might like that information, yes.  No, both of her fathers are with the local PD and her godfather is Xander Harris."

He waited while he looked up that name and muttered about the 'do not go near' warning on his file.  "Exactly.  I'm sure he'd love you to know about that so he didn't have to work as hard.  No, he's civilized Wade.  Doesn't want to take over the world.  Lets Wade torture those who want to own him.  Speaking of, is your assistant single?  I'm trying very hard to set Xander up with someone and it just came to me that he'd be nearly perfect."


Clay met with the escort agency guy.  "Xander would come but he's grounded because he's backed up again.  It's safer if he's at home."
"I can understand that.  A lot of my people think he's a bit...spoiled."

Clay shook his head.  "He grew up lower class.  He plays poker with nearly anybody.  Doesn't discriminate against anyone but drug dealers or those who want to own him."

"That's good but they're not sure if they can act as more than... well, what they are."

Clay nodded.  "That's a problem we expected.  Any idea where we can look?"

"Not really.  I've talked to a few other agencies that have rumors talked about knowing GHS members.  They all explained it better and said it might make him think that they're actually together."

"I can understand that and so will he."

"Could one of his cohorts here?"

"Unless I give up my comms tech, not likely."

"Pity.  I wish you luck."

"Thank you."  He shook his hand and walked off calling Xander.  "No joy.  They think you might get attached and they're not sure if only one could handle you."  He smirked.  "That's an option, yes.  Who?"  He frowned.  "I don't know him.  I'll ask."  He hung up and went to the spook bar, looking at the bartender.  "Paul Riet?"

"Bastard," he muttered.  "He's in town, Colonel.  Why did you need him?"

"Someone suggested he and Xander should meet and talk about traveling issues."

"He might," he admitted.

"I talked to someone but they can't meet them until they're in Greece."

"Riet might do."  He looked around.  "Riet!" he bellowed.  A young man that looked part Hispanic and part Korean walked out.  His hair was longish and spiky.  His clothes were a pair of tight enough jeans and a dress shirt.  He was wearing glasses and smiling broadly.  "Who sent you to us?"

"General Bishops' wife."  He smirked at Colonel.  "He said you might have a need for someone with my tastes."

"Depends on how you feel about traveling with a high level, needy GHS member who just broke up with someone."

"Gay sex doesn't bother me.  I like to travel."  Wade walked in and he sneered.  "What are you doing in this city?"

"I'm Xander's assistant," he said smugly.  "He's making me torture less but I get all his suitors to play with now."

Clay looked at him.  "You did good scaring the crap out of the last one.  Saved Jensen from doing it."  He looked at Riet again.   "What did Diana tell you?"

"About what you did.  High level GHS, recently broken up, needs something fantastic to keep him backed down, and I'd need to be slightly protective."  Wade nodded that was true.  "He's really working for the kid?"

"Yeah, he's helped him a lot.  No one who wants him wants to mess with Wade."  He leaned his back against the bar.  "We have a security team going."

"Good!  From what I hear it's necessary."  He smirked.  "I'm signing on to the London team after this trip or before if he doesn't click with me."

"We can do that," Clay decided.  He called Xander.  "We're at the spook bar with your possible traveling companion.  Sure.  I'm sure Toby will squeal."  He hung up.  "He's babysitting his godson for a few hours."  He looked at Wade.

"Macleod showed up," Wade told him.  "He didn't want Toby anywhere near him in case he was still insane.  I gave Adam a bomb for Macleod's car so he can blow him up and not take the crazy with the rest of the quickening."

"That'll work.  I know Xander told Jensen about one that was crazy and tried him but ended up tarzaning himself to death instead."

Wade nodded.  "Good!  Better than Xander being more crazy than he is."  His phone rang and he looked.  "Crap, someone tried to attack the SUV."  He called.  "Are you both good?"  He listened.  "Let me call...."

Clay pulled out his phone.  "Cougar, go pick up Xander.  Someone put something on his SUV and he's got Toby."  He hung up.

"Xander's really pissed that the jammer stopped the bomb that was pretty blatantly on his front bumper but the security system didn't warn him."  Wade put his phone up.  "He called Horatio first."

"Good.  Any idea?"

"Guy from the other day who wanted Mellie?"

"Possible.  He runs an arms design company.  I told one of his competitors about that."

Wade smirked.  "We've already worked on destroying his company.  Xander's psychic twins at the convention gave him all sorts of ideas for the engineers he has hired."

Clay snorted, shaking his head.  "I'm not sure if that's a good idea or not."

"Probably."   Xander walked in with Cougar and the baby in his carrier.  "Any idea, Cougar?"

"Horatio said it was the idiot," he said in Spanish.  He took Toby to sit with.

The spook at the table stared.  "Isn't that Adam's kid?"  Cougar smirked and nodded.  He looked around and noticed Xander.  "I'll pay you after my next job, Xander."

"Okay.  Before we go out of the country."

"Sure, I'll do it."  He went back to his lunch.  "Problems?" he asked Cougar, who nodded.  Someone walked in with the other baby, handing her over too.  She patted Toby on the head before walking off.  "This looks bad."

Wade snorted.  "Someone wanted to claim Mellie as a wife he'd raise."

The spook gave him an odd look then Clay, who nodded.  "What a fucking moron!"

"Forenth," Clay told him.

"Yup, a fucking moron."  He shook his head.

Xander was staring at the guy he didn't know.  "What do you know about me so far?"

"General Bishop's wife told me about you."  He smirked.  "Diana is very happy that you're keeping people out of her husband's hair."  He moved closer.  "I know about GHS.  I've been recruited to the London team."  Xander grinned.  "I've gotten your dossier from the society.  I think we can talk and see if it'll work."

"Fair warning, he wears out Jensen," Clay said.  Xander hit him without looking.  "Hey," he said but he was smiling.

Paul smiled at him too.  "That works sometimes."  He took Xander back into the back room so they could talk.  He was a good judge of people but Xander was complex and interesting.  Someone he'd like to get to know.  If they didn't work out at least he could be an escort and help him.  The trip was looking like a life's dream.  The kid clearly needed to travel thanks to his breakup too.

Wade looked at someone and nodded.  "Thank you," he mouthed.  They smirked.  Clay nodded his own thanks and they called to see what they could do beyond helping guard the kids.

The commissioner's secretary walked in and smiled.  "Wade, the Police Commissioner would like it quite a lot if you found this person who has just pissed off his entire crime lab.  He said as long as he's talking, walking, and able to confess and beg he should be there by midnight please."  She smiled at Clay.  "Please protect the children.  They had to lock Horatio in a room by himself until he calmed down.  Like any good parent he was going to take the law into his own hands."

"We can do that," Clay promised.  She smiled and left.  "Have fun," he told Wade.

Wade smirked his most evil smirk.  "Yes, I will be."  He strolled off.  "Xander, I'm going hunting the fucking idiot."

"He's somewhere in the west," he called back.  "No firm idea where."

"Thank you."  He drove to a contact out that way who would probably be able to tell him where the idiot was.

Cougar looked at the babies.  "They're very mad at that person for daring to hurt you two."

Clay looked at his phone.  "Jensen sent me a three screen rant of various ways of saying fuck."  Cougar snickered.  He sent back they had asked Wade to hunt him down and that someone had sent someone to meet Xander.  Jensen promised he'd be right there.  "Jensen's coming."

"I'll put some root beer in the fridge," the bartender quipped.  He did that and checked the ice cream too.  He only kept it for a few of the commandos.  Clay gave him an odd look.  "Root beer floats."

Clay shook his head.  "Doesn't shock me any."  He went to sit and help Cougar with the kids.  "Hey, tots."  They beamed and Mellie waved.  He smiled and waved back, getting a squeal.

Cougar was looking around to find the clicking noise, spotting something.  "Bomb!"  They all moved out.

Xander was walked out too and he paused to stomp the damn thing.  "I want to know who found the twins' designs."  He called his engineer.  "Someone has something that looks like the robotic spiders?"  He listened.  "Here where I was with the kids.  Thanks, man."  He hung up.  "Cougar, backup house."  He nodded, taking Clay with him.  Clay checked the cars.  SWAT and bomb squad rolled in.  "Guys, remember the *convention* and the spiders?" he asked.  The bomb squad guys nodded.  He had told them about it while sharing something.  "I stomped on one.  It's under the front of the bar."  They nodded and went to look for more once that one was picked up.

The head of the SWAT team came out.  "Who thought up that twisted idea?"

Xander grinned, walking him off to tell him about that convention of Xanders.  The thought of twin Xanders was enough to give him an ulcer but the fact that they were weapons designers nearly made him have a stroke.  There being another three hundred Xanders there at the convention made him start to pray.  Xander hugged him and bounced back to Paul's side.

"Can we have any plans for any explosives?  Just in case they get hacked or something?" the head of the bomb squad asked.

"Sure, talk to Peter and them."  Xander smiled.  "We'd never want you guys at a disadvantage.  Someone might actually succeed in blowing up Horatio and them if you don't have everything you can."

He smiled.  "Thanks, Harris.  Go find out who did this and ruin them?"

"Yup yup."  He smiled at Paul.  "Want to meet some of my poker buddies?"

"Sure," he decided.  "It'll give us more time to get to know each other."  He walked Xander off to his car, letting the bomb squad guys check since Xander felt something was wrong.  The tracking devices were taken in as well as the small walking explosive device in his engine.  Xander navigated and it was good.  The place they went to play poker all seemed to like Xander.  Even when Xander hissed in someone's ear and they started to pray.

"People, someone tried to blow up the spook bar," he announced.  A few others said quick prayers too.  "Wade's hunting the idiot who wanted Mellie and if it's someone else him too."

"Why can't I hunt?" Xander asked.

"You have a friend in," he said with a smile.

Xander looked at him.  "Let Wade.  He's probably missing torturing people."

Anya snorted.  "Not really.  We summoned a succuba to torture last night."  She ate a bite of lunch.

"This is Anya, she's Wade's girlfriend," Xander introduced.  "Ahn, this is Peter.  Someone wanted us introduced so he could travel with us."

She stared at him.  "Xander is still very special to me.  I tortured stupid men for over a thousand years.  I have stories that even Wade thinks are excessive and that make him puke."  She smiled sweetly.  "I'll get creative if you hurt Xander."  She ate another bite.  Xander hugged her again.  "Who has the terror twins?"


"Good!"  She swatted him.  "Go play poker, Xander."

He took Peter back there.  They made room for them when a few paid Xander so were therefore broke again.


Don hung up and sighed, looking at his phone.  "Someone sent a guy to meet Xander."

"That's cool," Ray said from his desk.  They were watching Horatio try to get past Frank and Speed in the interrogation room.  It wasn't working because Frank had sense and could physically block the doorway.  Speed was trying to get Horatio calmed down and it wasn't working because Speed was just as pissed off.

"I swear whoever touches those babies is getting my pumps up their butts," Alexx said firmly.  She was put into the same room and the door was shut.  "That is not cute, Ryan Wolfe!"

"Better to have you in here than getting arrested.  Your kids need you more," he told her.  He walked off.  "Beyond that, I can chop them into bait.  I've been missing sword practice."  He smirked at Ray.  "Maybe next life I'll use my knife skills and become an Iron Chef."  Ray cackled, shaking his head.  "Going to help the team."

"They're at the backup house," Ray told him.


Don went to talk to Danny.  "Someone sent a guy to meet Xander," he told him.

Danny looked at him.  "He'll come back to us, Don.  Even if it is in his next life."

Don slumped.  "That's sucky."

"Yeah, well, next life we've got to do less strenuous things."  Don nodded he agreed.  They went back to work finding whoever had threatened the family and the kids.  They'd have time to make plans for their next lives soon.


Peter Riet got back to his home and found someone waiting on him.  "Did you do the dishes?  I realized I forgot to run the dishwasher on the plane."  The only way to handle something like this was to be ballsy and arrogant.

Ian Edgerton smirked.  "I did.  They stunk."  Peter sat down, staring at him.  "I'm going to give you a word of warning.  If you hurt Xander, there's going to be worse than hell to pay.  The kid has a lot of people who respect him.  I got sent as a spokesman because I'm calmer and you know what I'll do to you."

Peter nodded.  "I'm starting to realize what a special guy Xander is.  We're both realistic about me being an escort for part of his fantasy trip.  Not a paid one but still an escort.  If something should grow between us we'd be honest about it and what might happen.  I even met his last boyfriends though they didn't see me."  He smirked.  "We'll be fine and I'd never hurt the kid."

"He's nearly thirty, you realize that?"

"Yeah, he told me."  He smirked.  "We had a birthday lunch while we were down there.  Once the idiot was caught."

"Good."  Ian stood up.  "You might ask him about his bottomless bag habit too.  Might help you pack."

"I did.  He showed them to me when we talked about the pets."  He smirked.  "I got to see the dogs knock down Wade and lap him until he begged."

"The dogs are great," Ian agreed dryly.  "Wade's gotten...better since Xander had Max killed for pissing him off."  Peter gaped.  "Max wanted him badly so Xander had him ripped apart by hellhounds."  He smirked.  The other guy groaned.  "Did he tell you that there's people in the CIA who think he's a god?  Or that he somehow got senior access?"  Peter slowly shook his head.  "We think he won it in a poker game."

"Good to know.  I met some of his poker contacts."

Ian smiled.  "We love his poker contacts.  They give him all sorts of weapons we don't want anyone to have."  He left him alone.

Peter sat down and called some contacts to get a better idea about the boy.  Xander was dynamic, active, a bit bouncy, but he was a nice, sweet kid.  Who apparently had more combat experience than he thought.  But that was actually better.  Though the rumors of why he had to have commandos traveling with him beyond the hormones was very interesting.


Fu and the other poker site heads all gathered for their monthly meeting.  It let them pass around people who were troubling for one reason or another.  People who weren't paying debts, causing trouble, making Xander kick their butts.  One who once picked on Xander and they had to arrange for him to leave Miami before he caused more problems.  Fortunately Wade had killed him in Orlando during the Disney incident.

"Okay, our first object of business tonight," the head of the poker circuit said.  "Is what are we doing while Xander's out of town."

Fu coughed.  "He'll be back about three times for birthdays.  He's told Wyatt to take any debts he's still owed."  That got a few smiles.  "He sat down and talked to Wyatt about that because he knows that some people would never be able to pay him until after they left."

"Is he taking the Winchesters with him?"

"For part of it, they don't want to go to India so they'll come and go."  That got a few more nods and some notes taken.  "Are we foreseeing problems from people who are normally cowed by Xander acting up?" Fu asked.

The others nodded.  "Possibly," the head of the circuit admitted.  "Plus a lot of pouting."  Fu smirked at him.  "Though less hormones floating around to confuse people."

"The retrieval team?"

"Is staying."

"Hmm.  Jensen will be upset," one said, making a note.  "I'll stock extra things for rootbeer floats."  Fu smiled at him.  "Beyond that, is there a growing problem that Xander's dating?"

"The one he's been with for the last few days isn't exactly a date," Fu said.

The owner of the retired agent's bar nodded.  "They were introduced by someone who knows the society.  Peter is going to the retrieval team in London.  He's a step up from a paid escort but not a boyfriend."

"Though it is nice that he meets up to Clay's standards for team members," Fu said.

"Even Wade was amused by him and he was confused by Wade," the agent bar's owner added.

"Interesting to note.  I suppose Xander would need someone to travel with to help his hormones.  We know he can't go a year without sex."  A few shook their heads quickly and one shuddered.  He had seen Xander after two days of being backed up recently.

"It's nice that he's found someone he doesn't have to pay but I'm told that Clay was talking to someone who did higher end escorts to help him with that."

"They would pick someone nice enough for the boy," another owner said.  "Though I'm not sure if they could clone Jensen or not."  Fu snickered, shaking his head.  "Have we heard moves against the lab with him being gone?"

"No, Xander's planning on throwing a going away party at my restaurant," Fu said.  "That way the poker circuit can wish him a good trip and remember that he's handing the warehouse to Jensen for their needs.  Plus he's putting Cougar in charge of the farm's needs and the account for it.  Jensen's getting his power of attorney for here in town with Steve Ellison."

"I think it's nice that Steve has made sure that none of the circuit in Cascade would dislike the boy," the head of the circuit said.

"Before the convention up there, Xander asked him to talk to the various contacts he had to make sure they'd have a peaceful time."  He looked at his notes.  "I am seeing that someone wants to shut our crime lab.  I'm also seeing that someone is trying to fire team seven in Denver because they caught the wrong politician with guns."  That got a shudder from someone.  "Indeed."

"Pass that onto Standish.  He has many underground contacts, including in the poker circuit," the head ordered.  Fu nodded.  "We don't want Xander to have to prove he can destroy them as well."  Don Cheva's second coughed but shook his head.  "He has?"

"A few wanted to own him but their family ties made them give him back."

"Good!" Fu told him.  "I'd hate to see Xander warp the family system."

"We'd all hate that," Don Cheva's second assured him.  "Though Chuck asked if we could send him to Sicily to talk to some of the Old Ones."

"I think that's unwise," Fu said.

"Xander giggled about that idea and said if he did, he'd have to deal with more suitors who were mean.  He didn't want that."

"Even better, the boy is using common sense," the head fo the circuit decided.  "Should we see problems from the gangs toward our crime lab?"

Fu shook his head.  "Xander got teased about that by one of the very young new initiates.  Xander stared at him for a minute, said he'd come back to ruin whoever had done that, and that Jensen was going to have control of his artillery if it was needed.  He could send Jensen all sorts of candy from overseas too.  The kid walked off nearly crying at what Xander promised would happen."

"How much of that is he bringing?" Don Cheva's second asked.

"Perhaps a few pieces but they shouldn't need anything.  The team going should have control of it."  They all nodded because Xander would still sneak more in case they ran into an apocalypse on the way.

"Are there bets being taken on whether or not the trio gets back together?" one of the guy asked.

Fu shook his head.  "There had been bets about how long it would take Xander to dump them but not about them getting together.  Bets about Jensen and Cougar instead of them as well.  A few bets on whether or not he keeps this new friend of his."

They took those down so they could find the bookies and see what the odds were.  They'd have to start new betting boards again.  They had hidden it when Xander had shown he had police contacts.  Now... well none of his contacts really cared unless they found themselves on them.

"What is going on with the people against the lab?" Don Cheva's second asked.  Fu shrugged.  "So it's not local?"

"No, Wade was complaining about idiots in DC hating gay men and women."

"We'll warn the Lieutenant before he gets to take a long vacation with Xander as well," one of them decided.  He made his own notes.  "Are the debt books getting too thick?"

"Right now, we need to switch books every year," Fu said.  "I need two more people to handle some of them since Wyatt's still taking classes."  He grimaced.  "Though it has helped him with the payments quite a lot.  He's streamlined it so it works easier and he's the one I'm using to train anyone new."

"A few of mine are talking about retiring and moving," another of the guys said.  "I'm wary though because we had someone Treasury try to get onto the staff."  The head of the circuit grimaced at that announcement.  "I told him I knew who he was because I'd seen him flirting with the pretty, blonde ballistics tech we all like to watch work."

"Perhaps we can get some extras from another town," Fu offered.  "Does Denver have a good book system?  If not, I might suggest Wyatt follow him, though I'd hate to lose him."

"Denver should have one but I'll ask them about that.  Pointing out that certain people are too scatterbrained to remember debts, much less who caused them.  If not, perhaps they're like LA and have privately hired ones."

"If so, then perhaps Wyatt will do that.  Xander would probably pay him more than I do and he wouldn't run the risk of getting shot doing delivery service."  Fu grimaced.  Someone had shot at Wyatt and Xander had made his displeasure known.  Wyatt had almost gotten sniffly about how Xander had told them he was going to 'fuck up their lives' for shooting at him.

Someone knocked and walked in.  "Sir, Treasury and IRS people," the guard said.

"Why now?" Fu complained.

They stomped in and presented a bad warrant for all their papers with them.

Xander strolled in ten minutes later.  "Guys, that warrant's not valid."  Don Cheva's second stared at it.  Then he nodded Xander was right.  "There's no judge by that name on the Federal bench.  I called someone in the FBI to check."

"Who're you?" one sneered.

Xander stared at him.  "I'm going to have your life so screwed up within a day for being a dirty agent and in the pay of a mafia family out of New England that you're going to wish I had just raped and killed you," Xander said honestly.  The agents pulled guns.  Xander smirked and sent off a spell.  "Did you think we wouldn't hear?  I mean, seriously?  With as many New Yorkers as we have retired down here it's been all over the circuit all day long."

"I forgot you can do real magic," Fu said.

Xander smiled.  "I can grow plants."  Officers rushed in.  "Whoa!" he said, stopping them too.  "Guys, not the right uniforms for Miami-Dade officers."  One struggled so Xander let him go.  "Sparky, you're not in the right uniform for the local cops.  Who the fuck are you?"

"Sir, who are you?" he countered, hand going to his gun.

Xander stared at him.  "I'm the one who's stopping these dirty agents from killing people for shits and giggles so they can start a war again.  Even if I have to go blow the people who hired them away.  Now, you're in Miami and not in Miami uniforms.  So where do you belong?"

"We're South Beach's," he said.

Xander made a buzzer noise.  "I've lived down here for over five years now, dude.  There's no way I wouldn't recognize the local outfits.  Especially since I was dating a detective until six months ago and I spoil the department horribly."  The officer gaped.  "If I have to ask again, I'm calling someone I know in the FBI to come sort this shit out."

"Really, sir," he said, pulling out his ID case.  "South Beach."

Xander took a picture of him and sent it to someone.   "Hmm, the head fo the crime lab says that you're wearing Sarasota's uniforms."  He looked at him.  "I think he'd probably know."  The guy pulled a gun.  Xander hormoned him.  The man whimpered.  "Do you really love that gun that much that you want it to fuck you up the ass?  Because you will be if you point it at me again."

"Xander, do calm down," Fu ordered.  Sirens were going off outside.  "Please let that be the lieutenant."

Xander looked.  "Nope.  Regular guys.  Up here," he called.  "We have fake dirty agents and cops who claim they're from South Beach."

The officers came in and stared then at Xander.  "New gas grenade?"

Xander shrugged.  "Magic."  He snapped his fingers and the agents tried to move so he froze them again.  "It's been all over the circuit all morning that these guys have fake warrants.  There's no such judge and Fornell agreed.  He's DC's Deputy Director out of the FBI."  The head officer nodded.  "These guys showed up after I had frozen them, without us calling, and said they belonged to South Beach.  That one pulled a gun on me," Xander said, pointing at the crying person.  "I told him if he pointed it at me again I was going to make him fuck it."

The officer nodded.  "Okay, that's reasonable, Mr. Harris.  Are you sure they're fake agents?"

Xander got the warrant from one's hand and handed it over.  "Look at the seal."

He felt it and frowned.  "It's not stamped.  It's signed by someone in the New York office but it's written on forms from the Boston Federal Courthouse.  Okay, then that's clearly a fake," he said.  He smiled and Xander relaxed some.  "Guys, is this an event?"

"Monthly sharing of any problems the poker circuit has," Fu told him.

"Wonderful!  We like that you guys keep it all very quiet and calm," the head officer said with a smile.  "It's caused us a lot fewer problems since you guys got together and set it up officially."  They all smiled.  "For now, relax.  Let me get an agent here to straighten them out."

"From what I'm told they're in the employ of a *family* in New England," Xander said.  "Non specific about what area."

"Good to know," the head officer said.  "Guys, gather weapons and handcuff the fake officers.  The agents we'll do next."  They got that settled while he called dispatch about that clearly fake warrant.  It wasn't official if it wasn't stamped.  They got agents headed their way as well.  As well as another few officers.

Xander sat down with the group.  "Do I need to do anything that I haven't thought of yet to make sure things don't go freaky while I'm out of town?" he asked quietly.

"No, we like how you've set up to collect any debts and that you've got a power of attorney set up," Fu said with a smile.  "It's reasonable and logical, which we do appreciate."

Xander beamed.  "Thanks, guys."  He looked back as an agent stomped in.  "Hi, Thomas."

"Xander."  He nodded, taking the warrant from the officer's hand.  He frowned, feeling along the bottom edge.  "No stamp so it's not legal."  The officer pointed at the discrepancy of signing.  "I saw that.  It happens, rarely, but without the stamp it's not legal.  Why are they frozen?"  Xander waved a hand.  They unfroze.  "That'll help, thank you.  Very softly done as well, Xander.  Nice job, better than the sleep gas grenades."

"I think I'm out again.  Some new Mexican gang tried to jump me last night by climbing over the community walls.  They were not happy that I defeated most of them with a sword and the few that I couldn't get I knocked out and then calmly questioned them until Ryan got home to arrest them."  He smiled.  "Dean thought I was very evil. So did Ryan because they both asked me about that tumor."  The agent snickered, shaking his head.  "I pointed out they were going to hurt the dogs and what I did to the last one that did that."  He smiled.  "Can I ruin their pitiful party of posers?"

"Please do," the officers agreed.  "They cause Miami a lot of problems."

"Okay."  He grinned.  "I'll start work on that later."  He unfroze the rest so they could be taken away.  Unfortunately it was one of the 'legitimate' officers who grabbed his hair and held a knife to his neck.  Xander looked at him.  "What the hell are you doing?"

"Shut up!" he shouted.  "We're going for a long walk."

"No, we're not."  The guy cut him so Xander drove his elbow into the guy's throat and then turned to break his neck.

"Xander, we want to question him," the lead officer ordered.  Xander settled for throwing him into a wall and partially out the open window.  "Thank you.  Not that I wouldn't break his neck for it.  Oh, hey, you heal."

Xander grinned, rubbing at the spot.  "Gift from a demon suitor so they could play harder.  It's why the tumor grows each time I'm seriously hurt."

"That so figures," another one muttered.  He got that officer arrested too.  "To Homicide, sir?"

"I'm not dating Don, guys.  Don and Danny decided being with me was too much damn work and we broke up."  They all stared at him.  He shrugged.  "After I had to rescue some people and got locked in the house for three days of them going to do stuff and leaving me there?  Yeah, we broke up."

"Good to know," the lead officer said.  "So...  How... not to be nosy but hormones?"

"Wolfe, friends," Xander sighed.  "For the trip I'm getting a very nice former commando sort."  He beamed.  "He's a really nice guy and someone set us up.  Which Wade appreciated since he had to keep turning down weapons dealers that wanted to date me."

Fu nodded.  "A few have sulked about them turning them down."

Don Cheva's second nodded faster.  "A few have asked my boss to support their desire to date you, Xander.  He reminded them they had to ask the Lieutenant, Clay, or Wade's permission to keep everyone safe and you from being taken again."

Xander nodded.  "They've been very good about weeding some of the ones who want me out.  Including two serial killers.  Anya thought that was hilarious."  He grinned at the officers.  "I only date deadly things usually.  My friends joked for years about that."

The officer nearest him patted him on the arm.  "You'll find someone worthy of your hair, Harris.  We know you will."

"Maybe this new one will be, not sure yet."  He hugged him.  "Am I cooking for anyone before we leave in a few weeks?"

"The second and the thirty-first could both use some pick-me-ups," the lead agent offered.  Xander beamed and nodded.  "I'll have them call with what you need to know."

"Cool.  Thanks, guys.  Sorry that I hormoned a few of them."

"They're going to be in interrogation for a few hours anyway," the agent decided.  "Let's go, boys."  They walked their prisoners out and left them alone.

Xander smiled.  "Let me go do some last minute stuff.  Let me know if we need things."  They nodded so he bounced out.

Fu looked at the others.  "Do you remember how insane Miami was before Xander?"  They all smiled and nodded.  They finished their meeting and went back to their areas to make sure things were all right and gather information about this new threat to Miami.


Later that night in Boston, Xander walked into a building and sat down, staring at someone.  "I'm really upset that your friends decided to try to screw with mine," he told the local head of the GHS society.  That got a groan.  "I'm so damn upset that they sent fake agents to Miami and threatened to turn my adopted city into a war, that I talked to people all day long.  Federal people, people in other sorts of services."  He stared at him.  "Adam."  That got a slump.

"By the way, Adam would like you to call him.  Tonight.  Toby's conveniently down and so is Ray so they don't have to hear him swear at you for that.  Because he's in Miami too."  He stared at the guy.  "Personally, I'd think moving is a really good idea since some of those you sent are known to be very connected in very bad things, and that makes them fair game if they show up again.  I hate having to kill people to protect myself.  I hated like hell doing it to the gang last night, I hated nearly making one kill himself earlier.  I'll do it again in less time than I can think about it, but I hate having to."

"You're not normal," he sneered.

"I am normal.  I can give you people to call who'll swear up and down that I'm normal.  I've also taken the time to train myself to be the best I can be so that whoever screws with me dies."  He turned to look at the person staring at his hair.  "Yes, it's pretty."  He smiled.  "Don't I know you from New York?"

"You're Flack's boy."

"Was.  We broke up recently."  He smiled.  "He thought I was a lot of work."

"You guys usually are.  Is there a problem?"

Xander grinned.  "Only that he sent fake agents to start a war with Miami.  That he's using Society assets for it Adam's a bit pissed about."  The guy winced and shook his head.  "Yeah, we're all sorts of unhappy in Miami."  He stood up and looked at the guy.  "Just... move, dude.  Somewhere people can't find you to bitch you out or kill you.  It'll keep some peace and quiet, which we all like.  Because I hate like hell having to do things like I should be doing right now to you."

He stared at him.  "Not that I won't if I'm forced to but....  I'm supposedly a nice guy."  He looked at the other one he knew in the room.  "By the way, that supposed gang of penis envy that climbed my house's walls?  Horatio was not real happy when he heard that they all went to jail and I had beaten a lot of them with only a sword.  Are their masters idiots?"  The guy gave him an odd look.  He stared at him.  "Yeah, your bosses."

"Some of them.  Why did they come at you?"

"Apparently they're denying to this moment that they want my hair.  Which is why they were going to show up, rape everyone in the house, including the kids if they were there, and then supposedly kill us all."

The guy winced.  "No, that's not wise.  You beat them with a sword?"

"Yeah, I was doing sword katas when they climbed over the walls.  And their climbing?  I do it better and I can't climb very well.  Obviously the bottom of the barrel."

"Probably, yeah, Harris.  Thank you for telling us that."  He grinned.  "The Lieutenant have them?"

"No, Ryan had them arrested after the few I didn't get with the sword I gas grenaded.  We had a charming talk waiting on Ryan to get home from work."  He smiled.   "Which is why Wade knows who they are, all their families, all their bosses, everyone who they owe money to...."  He walked off to disappear.

"Yeah, the bosses are not going to be happy and will probably have them killed in jail," he decided, calling his gang leader.  "Boss, huge ass problem."  He folded his hand and walked out talking to him.  "Just saw Harris.  He told me about how he took out our team in Miami with a sword and a few gas grenades.  No, he's pissed off."  He heard the laughter.

"Boss, I know Harris from when I was in Miami.  You don't fuck with Harris.  Harris has artillery, boss.  He's got that scary former commando Wade as his assistant.  He knows enough people to find anyone and kill them.  I've seen Harris take down things and people.  Boss, did you see that thing in St. Louis or the invasion in LA?"  He smirked.  "Harris is the guy with the hair at the invasion and the one with the sword at St. Louis.  That and he was dating cops."

He nodded.  "Yeah, I think it'd be a wise move.  Because I've seen Harris come back to life after someone shot him, boss.  Literally.  Yeah, he's one of those.  Plus he's got demons who want to own him.  That's what happened in Rio to that one Mala Noche who pissed off the Miami lab's redhead.  Yeah, that guy!"  He smirked at the wall.  "Which is why we don't piss off Harris.  No, they're in jail.  Harris said they tortured them for information too.  There's probably not many of us down there now.  I can but my mother still needs me up here.  Otherwise I'd still be down there.  Ask, boss.  But I can tell you I'm not going to touch Harris.  I know better."  He hung up and went back to the card table.  "Guys, does Harris know family sorts?"  A few from New York nodded.  "How?"

"When he was in New York he ran into a few," one said.  "He was always real polite.  Plus the ones that retired to Miami."

"Out in Denver, a few tried to take him as their personal *assistants*," another said.  "Their higher ups heard and made them give him back to Team Seven."

"There's rumors out of LA to run from him if he's out there handling a problem or to help him get it solved because it's world ending if he's in LA," one guy from out there said.

The GHS local head scoffed.  "He's not that good, people.  He's a level ten."

The demon that appeared stared at him.  "You are quite stupid.  Therefore you are a playtoy and not worthy of more than that.  My children will learn much from keeping you as a pet."  He stole him.

The guy from Miami called down there.  "Fu, I used to be in one of the gangs down there.  Harris was just up here in Boston and the guy he had a beef with just got taken by a demon.  Yeah, the guy over all that happening.  Thank you.  I know Harris said that Adam wanted to chew the guy a new one.  Thanks, Fu."  He hung up.  "He'll call the appropriate people."  He went back to his card game.  "At least the demon didn't eat him here," he said at the horrified looks he was getting.  Most everyone shuddered.  "Exactly.  They do that."  He looked up.  "What do we call those sort of things up here?  In LA they're Sunnydale events.  In Miami they're Winchester things.  Do we have a code name for them up here?"

"St. Bartholomew deals with them," the dealer told him.  "We just call a priest."

"I'll have one bless that table tomorrow, boys," the bartender offered.   The one in the back that was talking to a parishioner about his problems came out to do it for him.  "Thank you, Father."

"Best not to let the taint lie."  He went back to his talk.


Clay woke up the Boston Retrieval team with the happy news that they had to get someone and send him to Miami for leaking names and all that stuff.  They were not happy people in the least.  "Hey, I can send Harris back up," he offered dryly.  "The guy tried to have him killed."  He listened to the spluttering.

Jensen took the phone.  "If you leave him up there, Adam will bitch.  The guy's been using society funds to pay for gambling debts, helping out a gang, and funding a small time local terrorist who hates Indian people.  Up to you guys really."  He handed it back.  "I'm going to calm Xander down."  He grinned.

Pooch's phone rang.  "Marian said that someone tried to break into their house.  Her husband shot them."

"Check on the others," Clay ordered.  "The idiot up there probably sold their information too."

"Oooh, can we let Xander take out another gang with a sword?" Jensen asked, starting to bounce.  "Please?  It'll be really hot."

"That's a last resort.  Before then we get to shoot them," Clay ordered.  They nodded and went to check on the other members and warn them about Boston.  The one that was already missing was found at the airport and brought home.  They went over everyone's security arrangements with Horatio so it'd be easier and safer on everyone.


Adam called the entire International board together.  "Would someone like to have the local liaison in Boston to beat before I kill him?" he asked.

"What did he do?" the European head asked.

"He decided to join the underground community and sold off people's information to pay off his debts."

"Oh, dear.  Ours?" the Asian head asked.

"As far as I know, no.   From what we've been able to ascertain, he's only sold female members' information and only those in the mid-levels.  He decided above a level seven was too much work and below a three was too plain," Adam said sarcastically.  "He was messed up in some mafia scams as well from what we've heard."

"Harris?" the Asian head asked dryly.

"Found out when the Boston liaison got some of his people to start a tiff with the local establishments.  Xander heard about it and came in to stop the fake agents with their fake warrants and another attempt at the same time because someone else heard and decided to take the time to take out the team from Boston and ours while they were fighting each other."  Someone shuddered.  "Thankfully, Xander heard, got them stopped via freezing them, and then got the locals to handle it."

"Even better," the French head noted.  "So this is just a warning?"

"Yes, and the statement that if you want to beat him get him before I do.  Because I will have no mercy for this."

"Have fun with his head," the Asian head noted.

The South American head coughed.  "Is this going to ripple into our cartels down here, Adam?"

"No, I believe Xander made himself known and that he was in a rather bad mood about it," he said dryly but he was smirking at the phone.  "The contacts that they have here in Miami would probably tell them that screwing with Xander is suicide.  After all, that rash of marriages in Honduras was him as well.  They had conspired with those wannabes that tried to play with Xander and he destroyed them all."

"That was pretty nice," that liaison said happily.  "Started a few more peace talks.  Now they're merging together to start stronger groups of fighters."

"Well, better than multiple small groups harassing the locals.  It gives the locals time to recover between incursions," Adam decided.

"Quite and it gives the government an easier time to finding them."

"Is there evidence that others have this sort of problem?" the French head asked.

"No.  Most of them would not want one of us, they consider us bad luck and something only rich and royal sorts would like, which they don't like to pretend to be," Adam said.  "They'd never ape the manors of the elite that way."

"So it's localized, probably smaller heads who want the status of one of us," the Asian head said.  "That's better.  Have we gotten it from them?"

"Oh, yes.  Some of the hackers the family group knows helped immeasurably as they turned information over to the FBI."  Someone cackled.  "I also had them shut down our site for the next week or so until we can get better security on it, which they're also helping with."

"Even better, Adam.  Thank you for the heartburn," the Asian head said.  "Thank Xander for protecting us and tell him to calm down."

"We've found someone who can travel with him, a future retrieval team member," Adam said happily.

"Wonderful!  I know he'll be over here in a few months."

"Late February for India.  The group starts at Mardi Gras."

"Wonderful.  I hope they have an easy, nice trip."

"We all hope they have an easy, safe, fulfilling trip," Adam assured him.  "Xander has stated it is his intention to be a low-key traveling group."

"Excellent and safer," the Asian head agreed.  "Have the security team check with me every few days so I can handle anything that happens quickly."

"They have your number and the other regional heads' numbers to warn in case something happens.  I've emailed the itinerary to each of you so you can be aware that there's a lot there.  There's a good group for everything but one city in Russia.  It's an out-of-the-way city and that's really just a Wednesday through Friday so they're switching out groups during that at the major airports before and after that city."

The French head hummed.  "I have it, yes.  It's a good list of places to go."

"If others want to join them there's still time," Adam offered.  "They have an eight person security force, with one female member.  So even if a few have to break off to rescue someone, the rest is still going to be protected.  Plus the extra helping of Wade and Xander's escorts."

"Why does he need Wade?" the Asian head asked.  "I know of Wade's last job.  Nearly personally actually."

Adam cleared his throat.  "Look in Xander's dossier."

"Health records sealed by order of US Homeland Security," the French head read.  "Oh, dear.  And they're going to Russia?"

"No one knows," Adam told him.  "Wade does keep track of those sort and scares the crap of them.  Most of them wouldn't try Xander because of Wade and Xander's own scary reputation."

"That's a good reason to have someone like Wade," the Asian head decided.

"Wade's girlfriend is actually a bit scarier than he is.  Anya made him scared once," Adam said.  Toby sniffled.  "Hold on, Toby."  He got him out of his crib and came back.  "Sorry, he woke up."

"That's fine, Adam.  It's good seeing you being a father," the European head told him, sounding happy.  "Do we have any idea if he might be?"

"No, not for many years thankfully.  Though Xander has said that he'll give both children in the family the 'if you skip school like I did you'll end up a GHS like me' speech sooner than he did to Horatio's nephew.  Who ended up being a level four."

The Asian head laughed.  "That's good to know it's skipping school that caused mine.  I did do a good bit of it myself."  Something banged.  He sighed.  "Let me go help my own daughter escape.  She climbed up the shelving unit in the kitchen and tipped it over on herself again."  He hung up.

"Have fun with Toby," the French head said, hanging up.

"I'll listen extra hard when they're down here though most of those areas are usually peaceful," the South American head said.  "Not Australia?"

"He said he'd go there later on and visit all those and the island nations in about five years," Adam said.

"Wonderful thinking.  I'll be going on that one if possible.  Have a good night, Toby."  He hung up.

Adam hung up and looked at his son.  "Why did you get up, son?"  Toby beamed at him.  "That's a new tooth."  He checked his gums.  "Three new teeth.  I'm impressed, Toby."  He carried him into the kitchen to get him something for that then they went to read in bed with the other daddy, who had taken some cold medicine and went to bed early.  Toby reached over to pet Ray's hair while Adam read, earning a smile and a picture taken by Adam's phone.  It was a sweet moment.


Danny looked up at Don as he walked out of the office they had in their apartment.  Don didn't look happy.  "Bad news?" he guessed.

"Slightly."  He handed over the picture.  "That's the guy they set Xander up with to travel with."

Danny looked at the picture.  "Is it a boy or a girl?" he snorted.

"Boy I think, I can't be sure."  He sat down.  "Did we drive him that way?"

Danny put the picture down face down.  "No.  That's just him trying something new.  He's young and needs to figure his own wants out before he comes back to us."

"Yeah, I hope it's that," Don decided.  He laid down and watched the news with Danny.  They were content with each other for now.  They'd talk to Xander when he got back from his fantasy trip.

The End.

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