Interesting Exchanges
 
 
 

Xander came out of the spa smiling and happy, and the buzz stopped him.  He hurried to his car and got in, beating the person who pounded on his window.  He stuck the keys in the engine and unrolled it an inch. "Yes?"

"I want your head."

"Unfortunately it's rather attached.  I don't take challenges.  I'm a berserker."  He looked at the guy.  He saw the insanity.  "I'm not taking your head, man.  Go lay down on the railroad tracks.  You're insane.  Leave your number and call when you become more stable."  He thumped on the window.  Xander grimaced.  "You're causing a scene in public.  It's going to draw the cops.  Do you really want to do this here?"

"I want your head and I'll take it!"

"I don't think so."  He saw Eric pull up and groaned.  He called him.  "Dear, this person next to my car thinks he wants to challenge me but he's clearly insane.  Like ranting.  All he's said so far is he wants my head and he'll take it.  Nothing else."  He nodded at that.  He looked at him.  "You want me that badly, you come to me tonight, at Bay Park.  Not here, not in public.  Not in the open."

"I'll take your head now!"  He tried to get in the window.

Xander listened.  "Like I said, he looks insane.  I don't need more voices in my head, teach."  He nodded.  "On it."  He turned over the engine.  "If you're serious, I'll be there tonight. If not, then not."  He backed out and left him there ranting and screaming.  He hung up with Eric, pulling just far enough away to be out of feeling distance and watched as Eric arrested him.  The guy tried to attack him too but he ended up on his face.  Eric called back once he was cuffed.  "You think he'll be out then?  I'll be there but you know what'll happen if I take him and he's that insane."  He nodded and sighed. "I know, I got challenged.  Can't I just hurt him and leave it there?  Because I saw Macleod, Eric.  He came after me because I know Oz."  He nodded.  "That's fine.  We'll be there.  I meant you and me, dumbass.  I know that."  He sighed.  "Eric, I'm still a berserker.  That means I'm a danger to others if I lose it."  He hummed. "Yeah, what a shock."  He hung up and headed home, no longer relaxed.  He walked in and dropped his bag of bath stuff in the bathroom then went to the practice area to find his sword and make sure it was sharp and in good condition.  Danny came home first and tracked him.  "Don't ask.  It was some insane guy.  Eric said I had to go anyway and I'm supposed to go alone."

"Technically you're supposed to go alone," he said calmly.  "It's not a good idea if you lose it however."

"That was my point.  That I could end up being dangerous to others.  Plus, this guy is seriously insane.  He was pounding on my window and only said he wanted my head and was going to take it.  Nothing else."

"Taking an insane one's head probably isn't a good idea, especially for someone as sensitive as you and as young as you.  Who did you talk to?"

"Eric."

Danny sighed and called him.  "We need to talk.   Yes, we do.  Yeah, we do," he said firmly.  "As in come over and Ryan and Xander can play for a few hours."  He hung up and looked at him.  "He's got to tell Ryan too.  I'm pretty sure he's a pre-immie."  He felt another one coming in and groaned. "Not again!"  He went to answer the door.  "Adam.  Ray?"

"He's fine.  He's visiting his family at the moment.  I came to check on my favorite student."

"He got challenged by one of the truly insane earlier," Danny said dryly.  Adam/Methos groaned, heading back to check on his student.  "He's fine.  He's well trained and all that," he assured him.  He saw Eric pull in and got the gate behind him, then had to unlock it for Don, who walked in shaking his head.  "Xander got challenged."

"I heard.  He's insane.  He was foaming at the mouth when he got drug in.  Eric let him go with a warning and he attacked another, higher society, woman.  She had him arrested."  He walked in.  "Adam."  He grinned and hugged him.  "Hi.  What are you doing here?"

"I came to check on Xander."  He looked over as Eric came in.  "Eric."

"Adam," he said, eyes wide.  "You know these guys?"

"I found and helped train Xander," he said dryly, nodding at him.  "Who else in GHS would ever train one so high."  Xander punched him on the arm.  "What was that for?"

"I'm not high.  I've been a good boy.  Most of the time," he said at the disbelieving looks.  "What?"

"Who was it who had chocolate for dinner last night?"

"Sorry."  He shrugged.  "Should I head out?"

"No, someone else had him arrested," Eric told him.  "You're right, he was truly insane."

"Yeah, and me taking his head probably won't help me any," Xander said dryly. "I saw Macleod.  He was fully insane.  The guy came after me.  He pissed on some of my clothes all because he hates Oz and Oz dated my former best friend."

"Point," Eric agreed. "He's truly a berserker?"  Danny nodded at that.  Adam looked at him.  "Didn't tell him?"

"Nope," Don said.  "Sorry, Adam."

"Not your fault, young one.  Xander, since it won't be a challenge tonight, would you spar with me?"

"As long as you don't pull what Connor did and try to force me down that far."

"Agreed.  I have no desire to stop you that much tonight.  I have heard about the semi- fallen state you reach."  Eric shuddered.  "Must he do it?"

"Yup, he must," Xander said dryly.  "Swords are behind you if you don't have yours.  Guys, clear out.  This is still a small room."  They all cleared out. "No Ryan?"

"He's sulking."

"You could bring him over," Danny noted.  "I'm pretty good at sensing pres and I think he is one."

"I know he is one but he's still at home."  He looked at him.  "I don't like to tell them beforehand. They do stupid stuff."

"Yeah, but it's better to die young than sixty or seventy when he's not strong enough to hold off a challenge."

"Point.  Is that why you brought Don over?"

"Don could feel quickenings.  He felt all of us the night Xander came across.  It was going to be within days with how agitated he was and with his luck it'd have been a car crash and been truly dead."

Eric nodded at that.  "Good point.  Want us to watch, Xander?"

"I don't care."  He waited while he got a sword then lunged casually, getting a smirk. "I was in a good mood. I got done with a scrub and a wrap before that guy pounced my car."

"If I asked would you sell that thing to someone else and get something smaller?" Don asked.

"No. I like my car.  No matter how many times I have to get you back for calling it the gaymobile I still like my car."  He blocked Adam's swing and ducked under, coming up next to him, his sword against his groin. "More than enough to knock you down," he said, stealing a kiss with a grin.  Adam groaned and shoved him back, so he attacked again and drove him back.  Adam smirked and drove him off, then found himself on his back with Xander on his stomach grinning down at him.  "Imp."

"Yes?"  He leaned down, pinning his arms.  "What I could do with you in this position," he teased.

Adam moaned.  "You're playful tonight."

"They've had a bad case."  He stole another kiss with a grin.  "The great thing is, all you can do is force me onto my back and as soon as you move to grab your sword, I've got you in the nuts again."  Adam shifted and Xander had him again once he was on his back.  Adam moaned.  "Yeah, I found out how much we can stand when the one guy had me castrated."

"I'm so sorry."  He gave him a cuddle.  "I did mean to spar with you."

"I know.  I'm actually pretty good now."

"You were looking better than I usually see," Eric agreed.

"Ryan would take both my heads if I tried to cuddle you."

"Point.  Get up, let me call Ryan over, then we'll eat."  They all nodded, heading to change or call their boyfriends while Adam and Xander talked and occasionally got in a few shots or a cuddle.  By the time Ryan got there, Xander was sweaty, hard, and ready to moan, but Adam was going to explode soon. Xander chased him outside and onto the side lawn, pouncing him to tickle him.

Ryan parked and looked at him. "Awww, another friend from New York?"

"Chicago and this was my trainer, Adam," Xander introduced.  Adam pulled a dagger and tapped him on the stomach with it. "Easy in front of the normal people."  He shifted and took it, throwing it off to the other side, away from Ryan.  He and Adam went back to wrestling while Ryan shook his head and headed inside.  At least until Xander yelped.  Then they all came running.

"How stupid are you?" Danny yelled, getting Xander off him.

"We should call someone.  He's bleeding heavily," Ryan said, reaching for his phone.  Eric took it from him and shook his head.  "What are you doing!"

Eric looked at his boyfriend. "Telling you something very important," he said quietly. "Because you need to know.  Take him inside."  They brought Xander into the bathroom and let him die in there.  Ryan turned away but Eric made him look back.  "Watch his wound."  Eric glared when Ryan started to move.  "I mean it.  He's fine."

"He's not!"

"He is."  Xander gasped.  Ryan gaped and turned back around to stare at him.  Eric gave him a little nudge, letting him go over there and check the wound.  Ryan stared and pointed, then at Eric.  Eric nodded. "He's like that.  I'm like that.  Half the people in the house are like that at this moment," he said quietly.  "He'll be fine."  He pulled Ryan up.  "He's awake."

Adam walked in.  "Sorry, Xander. I did not mean to do that."

"It happens."  He pulled him down to kiss him.  "I always need a nap when I come back.  Any idea why?"

"We all do," he said dryly, helping him up and to clean up.  He checked the spot then led him to his bed to take a nap.

Ryan walked out and got a beer, gulping it.  Then he turned to Eric.  "Spill, now."

"Okay."  He led him back to the practice room, closing them in to talk.  Ryan ranted a few times but it was fine by the time he came out.  Eric looked at the dinner being fixed. "Are we still invited?"

"As long as Ryan doesn't go off the deep end," Don said with a shrug.

"You knew?"

"Yeah."

"Are you one?" Ryan asked.

"Nosy," he teased, smirking at him.  "What do you think?"

"I think the only way for me to know without hearing it said is to pick up a knife and stab someone delicately to see if it heals."

Danny looked at him.  "Try it, watch me kill you."

"So talk!   I'll worry a lot less about you guys."  Don nodded and Danny shrugged. "You don't know?" he taunted.

"I'm not that chatty."

Ryan reached for a knife and Eric stopped him.  "Calm down.  He's panicking."

"I know."  Danny smirked at him.  "He'll be fine if I crush his head in too."  Eric shrugged.  He looked at Ryan.  "Why must you know?"

"Because OCD is a disease about control," Eric said dryly.  "He feels out of control and he'll start to clean here.  Or possibly stab me until he gets full knowledge."

"Xander, Ryan's being mean to Danny," Don called.  Xander walked out and pounced him, dragging him back to the bedroom, which made Adam laugh.

"Hey, mine," Eric called but he didn't protest too much.  It wasn't like Xander was going to take his lover away from him.  He hoped.  You never knew, Ryan might fixate and become one of his stalkers.  He ducked and yelped as another shower of stones went off.  "Do you mind!" he shouted.  "That's rude!"

"One of these days one of us is going to do that and they're going to show up to tell us why it's not," Don said dryly.  "Probably using protocol stuff."

Adam came out and grimaced with distaste.  "Couldn't they send the *good* stuff?" he said bitterly, going back to his cuddling.

"You make me jealous and I'm poisoning your food," Danny assured them all.

"I'm sure you'll think about it but should you do so I'm telling your boss," Adam noted.  "With Ryan's help."

"Hey, he's Eric's boyfriend," Don called.  "Not Xander's."

Xander came out and pouted at them.  "We all know I'd never touch Ryan without Eric giving me his permission and Ryan doing the same.  The same as we know that you and Danny don't care if I play with Adam or his Ray toy."  They sighed and nodded at that.  "So jump off it before they decide my harem treats me poorly."  He went back to his cuddles, but suddenly squealed.

"Damn it!" Adam yelled, coming out.  "Well, at least they're together."

"Um, we can't be sure Ryan's a pre-immie," Eric said blandly.

Adam looked at him and nodded.  "He is.  Danny and I are both sure of it.  Your little boy is one of us."  He patted him on the cheek.  "Xander will never show you everything he knows.  It's strategic in case you ever have to face him. The same as I don't show him everything I know in case he has to face me some day."

"Point but I'm supposed to be teaching him."

"You're doing very well.  He's smoother than he was before."  Someone rang the bell so he went to get it, smiling at the two out there.  "Horatio, Timmy," he said, hugging them both. "Xander and I believe his name was Ryan are presently missing but do come in."

"Again?" Speed complained as he walked in.

"Of course.  Probably the same demon as before."  He walked them back there.  "Look who showed up."

"They're mentoring us," Danny agreed dryly.  "Sorry, they just disappeared.  Ryan's probably going to need tomorrow off work."

"If not longer," Eric said dryly.  "Think it's the guy with the stones hobby?"

"Either that or a continuation of the first one," Don said grimly.  "At which point in time, Xander will be watching Ryan's back for him."

"Huh?"

"Think chicken fights only with people," Danny offered.  "Run by demons.  That's where  he ended up."

"Charming.  Can we go there and see?" Eric asked.  Adam shrugged. "Can you go there and see?"

"I have contacts who might be able to tell me."  He went to call one, coming back a few minutes later.  "It was them, they're circling the wagons.  Xander's already showing his arse up there."  They all smirked at that.  "So far Ryan is with him and Xander's taking on the demon who's holding that realm steady.  So it might be relatively shortly instead of three months this time.  Well, except it'd be longer to them because time is shorter up there."

"Goodie," Don agreed happily.  "Can't we go kill them?"

"No.  Soon though.  I'm sure Xander is."  He looked at Horatio.  "So, how have you liked having Don and Danny with you so far?"

"They're very good at what they do and the minor problems were quickly cleared up," Horatio assured him.  "Fully."  Don nodded at that.  "Should we set up a watch?"

"With our luck he'll have to come back from New York," Danny said grimly.  "Last time they dropped him off at Devi's."

Speed shuddered.  "Eww."

"Yeah and the old pimp decided Xander should have come back.  Told him that before he walked out."

"Interesting.  He kill him that time?"

"No but this time is looking more special," Adam offered.  That made the couple smile. "He'll be fine. Xander has survived a lot."

"He's still really young," Eric countered.  "Ryan would be a newbie to the whole sword thing if he's brought across."

"Yes, and Xander had some training up there."  His cellphone rang.  "Hello?  Ray," he said warmly.  "No, nothing's going on.  No, Xander's not home at the moment.  We're waiting for him to come back.  Well, actually, yes, he was taken again but it's nothing that serious.  I'm sure it'll only be a few days this time and they took an officer who knows him with him.  No, none of them.  Remember, they moved to Miami.  Of course.  If they're not back by the time your vacation is done you can come down and wait with me.  Of course I will.  Love you too.  Be a good boy.  Yes, love, eat the brownie if it makes you feel better and I'll solve that when I get home."  He smiled.  "Good boy.  Love you too.  Have a good chat with your mother."  He smirked. "Or that.  Of course I'm being good and not being challenged.  Thank you, love.  You too."  He hung up and shook his head.  "He worries quite often."

"Yeah, gee, I wonder why, old fart," Danny said dryly, making Eric laugh.  "So I see you've heard about some of his recent issues?"

"I heard Duncie poo was following him there for a while."

"And then some," Adam said dryly.  "Come, we should eat.  Xander wouldn't want us to hold dinner for him or Ryan.  If they can, they'll eat somewhere.  If not, Xander will kill something and roast it.

They decided he was right and came to the table to sit and chat list mostly old friends.  Though Horatio did get some teasing by Eric until Speed threatened to 'accidentally' stab him at work the next day.

***

Aiden looked up as voices came closer to where she was sitting.  She was still staying in Xander's place until it sold and considering her options for moving to Florida.

"Oh, come on, let me go back and kill Giles, please?" Xander was whining and begging.  "Pretty please?  I won't spike my hormones on purpose for six whole days.  Please, Ryan?"

"No.  Leave him there.  It's a worse fate."

"But he and Connor...."

"No, Xander.  Let the older ones handle it.  Besides, this way you can torment Giles while he has to watch since they're going to be locked in there within a day."  He walked him out of the portal and nodded at the cops. "Thanks, guys."  Their bags were tossed out too.  "Even better.  Thank you for being so understanding."  He waved and grabbed Xander, letting him carry the bags.  The portal slammed shut.  "They were much nicer than most cops would've been about that."

"Second time they've been there to save me," Xander said dryly.  "I think it's nice those who claim they adopted me gave up too."

"Well, you did take off their mark," Ryan reminded him.

"I didn't know a thing about them," Xander defended.  "Not like anyone *told* me anything."

"Good point.  Sword?"  He held it up.  "Mine?"  Xander patted it.  "Okay, and we're where?"  He looked around.  "Hmm, there's a person living here."

"Aiden!" Xander squealed, running over to pounce her and cuddle her.  She unfroze and hugged him back.  "I missed you!  You're coming to Miami, right?  Because we could use you.  They're all really stiff and uptight but there's lots of hotties for you to unstiffen, or stiffen in whole new ways," he babbled with bright grin, then he squeezed her again.  "Come on, pack, we'll go down together."

"Xander, air," she complained, pushing at him.  He let her go and pouted.  "What's going on?"

"They kidnaped us together," Ryan told her.  "They wanted Xander to either be their ho or their fighter ala Gladiator.  So his answer was 'Xander has a sword and uses it on everyone'.  Anytime anything got near us, Xander took care of it and taught me a bit more about them."  Xander beamed at that.  "Personally I think he's a bit scary."

"I know he's scary.  I've seen him with bedhair and no cuddles for *days*," Aiden said, teasing Xander, who just nodded and smirked.  "So why are you back here?"

"They can only drop me at my last known address," Xander said dryly.  "Which is right in your lap."  He shivered then shifted closer in her lap. "Aiden, can  you do me a huge favor and take the cock ring they've got on me off?"

"It's got a tiny lock and I'm not going there," Ryan told her.  The look on her face was so funny.  It was part horror and part lust and part wide-eyed, freaked out look.  "My boyfriend would not be amused."

"Um, didn't we say we weren't going to go there?" she asked carefully.

"I don't care if you do more than open it, but it's got a really tiny rotary lock and I can't see the numbers or feel the clicks and Ryan's scared of it.  Even though I got his off for him."

"Hell yes, it was put on you three months ago.  I'm not getting near that part of you until well after it's off there.  I might have to start showering you with presents instead of Eric."

"How about you take him to that brothel Danny brought you to, that way you can wear it out and not hurt anyone?" Aiden suggested.  Because she could feel it now, the lust flowing off him.  She had some serious urges coming over her and Xander was still just an innocent kid.  She didn't want to *hurt* him or anything.

He beamed.  "Sure, Aiden.  Wanna come?"

"Not my thing," she noted dryly.  "Besides I'm going over this old case and it's driving me nuts."

He kissed her.  "If someone like that should hurt you, that would be the last thing they would ever do," he said slowly and clearly, making sure she understood.  "Because Don will kill them and if Don can't, Danny and I certainly will.  Are we clear?"  She smiled and nodded.  "Good, because you're coming to Miami anyway."

"I think I've got it."

"Then tell Stella."

"I can't, they're busy and the new people are stressing them out."

Ryan coughed.  "I can see how busy Danny is.  We should tell them we're alive anyway."

She considered it.  "Mac would hate that."

"Yay," Xander said. "Two investigators is always better than one."

"Maybe."

"So do that."

"I... I just can't."  Xander took the folder and handed it to Ryan.  "Hey!"

"They've been training him.  He's helping."

"What?"

"They've been training him whenever they can get him near a scene. He's helping you to help his training while I go get this off."

"It won't be today."

"Then you've got three days and then we're all going to Miami, even if I have to kidnap you and stick a bikini on you on the plane.  Understood?"  She opened her mouth and he kissed her, watching her melt.  "Good. Where is that place?"  She pointed to the letter on the table. "Ryan, would come with me to watch my back?"

"Sure."  He looked at Aiden.  "Can I help?"

"It's more trapping the guy than not," she admitted.  "He's smart but he's a serial."

He looked through the folder then smiled at her. "Does he know you?"  She shrugged.  "Would he remember you?"

"Probably not real well."

"Then maybe we can trap him?  That way you've got backup if he tries something?"

"Yeah, maybe," she agreed, watching as Xander stretched. "Go with him, he's putting off a visible haze.  I won't be doing anything tonight."  They nodded and headed out while she curled up.  Xander was forceful when he wanted something.  She had forgotten about that.  Then again she didn't expect to have Xander fall into her lap either.  She thought about calling the guys but Xander would probably be doing that on the cab over.  And hey, maybe someone at the brothel would take off that cockring. It's not like they'd be scared to get that close to his dick, because she had seen Danny walking funny a few times and she knew how potent he was.  She was scared of that part of him.  That's why she'd never be part of his harem for real.

She saw a movement from their bags and squeaked.  There was no telling *what* Xander had brought back with demons involved and she didn't want anything demonic to eat her.  So she got up and ran to the bedroom to lock herself in until the guys got back.  It was only safe and the bed was up there so she could handle those urges to pounce, bite, and ride someone to death.

***

Ryan drug Xander into the station. "No, you can't hurt them.  I swear you've been violent for the last two months."  Everyone stared at him. "What?  How long has it been since he was taken this time?"

"Two weeks," one of the guys at the desk noted.  "Flack's pacing."

"Hmm.  Okay."  He walked Xander that way, making him stand beside Don's desk.  "He's violent.  His answer to the kidnapers was 'Xander has a sword', but I learned a lot about them."  Don groaned and relaxed.  "He's fine.  The DPP officers were very nice and understanding about him being there again.  They treated us very well when they came to rescue us. I learned a little bit from them too.  When they put us in New York, we landed at the old place and Aiden made us go to the place Danny took him before so he could get off the tiny, locked cockring since I wasn't going to touch it after three months of it being on there and it had a small rotary dial to open it.  By the way we dropped her at home.  Can I go clean up?"

"Yeah, you look like you need it."  He stood up and looked Xander over, especially his hair.  "I know how fast this grows.  How long were you there?"  He eyed Ryan's shaggy mop of hair too.  "Xander?"  Xander hugged him.  "Good boy," he soothed, patting his back. "You're back and we're not mad at you but if you left us anything we'll go kick their asses."

"Nope.  That's why Xander's answer was 'Xander has a sword'," Ryan assured him.  "I learned lots from him."  Don nodded and sat down, letting Xander curl up in his lap for a few. "He's fine.  He was functioning normally until we got here.  Then he felt one?"

"I felt you both and Danny's in the field," he soothed.  Xander relaxed.  Don dialed his desk phone, handing Xander the handset.  He looked at Ryan.  "You okay too?"

"I'm fine.  They wanted me to make Xander do what they wanted.  I was their big threat."  He leaned on the desk while Xander slid to the floor to talk to Danny.  "He was fine until a few minutes ago."

"That's fine.  It's only been two weeks here."  Ryan shrugged. "How many months there?" Ryan held up four fingers.  "And he went right to that one place?  The one they got into trouble for going to?"

"Yup.  Took them most of the night and they said they could make something like a mystical viagra from him so he let them."  Don smiled at that.  Ryan stood up when he saw Horatio coming toward them.  "He's back, we protected each other."

"Good."  He looked Ryan over.  "Let me guess, time ran a bit worse there?"  Ryan nodded.  "How bad?"  Ryan held up four fingers.  "I see.  It's been two weeks here and your supervisor is not amused.  I reminded him these things happened to Xander and you had been with him when he was taken."

"So I'm not in trouble?"

"No you're not.  You are being switched to my team however."  Ryan beamed at that.  "So tomorrow you will come in and we will get you working under Speed.  Today, we'll bring you home and debrief you."

"Danny's got him," Don said, pointing at the phone.  "Oh, they said they brought Aiden down."

"I helped her get the guy she was after," Ryan said modestly.  "Called Mac to come get him.  He was not happy that she had done that but they finally had him because she did press charges. He tried to hurt her."

Xander looked up. "Yeah, in a beat you and kill you way."

"Excuse me?" Don asked.  "Who?"

Xander looked at him.  "*THAT* asshole."

"Ah."  He nodded.  "But she nailed him?"

"Open and shut according to Mac."

"I'll make sure tonight."  He took the phone when Xander held it up but it was clear so he hung it up.  "Okay, let's get you two home.  Horatio, can I be excused a bit early?"

"Go.  Take them to your place.  Take statements for the rest of us."  Don nodded at that, standing up and hauling Xander up.  "Are you boys truly all right?"

"It was scary but we had the time to calm down because there was a few days of fighting afterward," Ryan offered.  "Xander cut off some birthmark thing and the whatever-they- weres were not amused.  There was a lot of shouting and tension but they got it settled.  We got this settled.  We ran into someone he said was named Giles?" he asked Don, who growled at that.  "He's alive for now.  I kept him from that one for now.  Full and complete statements?"  Horatio nodded. Ryan pulled a set out of his back pocket and handed them to him.  "We did them in New York with Aiden.  So we're going to clean up. I need a haircut badly."  He pulled on Xander's arm.  "Come on."  Xander gave them both hugs then followed.  "Good.  We'll go use your bathroom of sin."

Xander smirked at him.  "You didn't like the last one?"

"I did like the last one.  Especially the pool in the lobby.  I also thought it was very cute that you were nearly skinnydipping when Mac burst in to talk to Aiden and he froze like he had been turned into stone when he saw you nearly naked."  Xander gave him a shy grin.  "Uh-huh.  Come on.  Clean up and we'll see about lunch."

"Where have you two been?" Frank Tripp demanded when he saw them.

Ryan shrugged. "Damned if I can explain it but somewhere they wanted Xander.  I was with him when he was snatched so they took me to make him do what they wanted. At least until Xander found a sword and then Xander with a sword was kind of impressive.  He's good at that."  Xander beamed.  "It's a good form of self defense to play with the sharp and pointy things," he said at Frank's amused look.

"I bet it is.  How long have you two been back?"

"Two days, no flights sooner," Ryan said grimly. "But we brought their friend Aiden down.  He was even good when we got back."

"Fine.  Caine's seen you?"

"And Don. He cuddled Don.  We're going to clean up."

"You could use a trim, kid," Speed agreed as he joined them.  Xander hugged him too.   "Aww, it's all right."  Xander whispered.  "We figured as much."  Something else got said. "He's alive?"  Xander nodded and pulled back. "Then you guys will deal with that together.  Go clean up. We'll see you guys later."  They nodded and headed up the street. He and Frank watched as someone walked over to chat them up and Ryan just shook his head and walked Xander off.  "He's a good handler of the kid."

"He is, but it's scary.  Wolfe seems like an unfun version of Xander."

"Maybe, Frank," Horatio said as he joined them.  "They didn't ask for a ride?"

"Nope and Hodgekiss, who was totally against gay guys but not lesbians for some reason, just tried to hit on the boy."  He saw Danny park and winced. "He's not happy."

"He is, he's just pissed that he can't hurt one of them himself," Speed offered.

Don joined them and looked, then went down to the door.  "They're walking home and they brought down Aiden.  She finally got Pratt with Wolfe's backup."

"Good!  They good?"

"Xander cuddled.  He kinda shut down when they got here.  Wolfe was walking him around by his wrist."

"We can fix that."  He moved closer. "Eric know yet?"

"I thought he was with you."

"He was but he had to go talk to a suspect."  They both pulled out their phones and texted Eric and Adam.  That way they could both quit worrying.  Because those two were some fussy lovers.  Though, with lovers like Ray, Ryan and Xander maybe they should worry.  Especially Eric since Ryan had clearly been brought across somehow.

***

Aiden looked up as Danny walked in and casually slammed the door, pointing for his benefit toward the showers.  He gave her a hug, making her smile, then went to pounce Xander.  He found Ryan scrubbing his back.  "Should I be jealous?" he asked.

"No," he said, handing over the sponge.  "One of the athlete's foot demons touched him and gave him casual transfer to his lower shoulder blades.  He can't cream or clean the area well enough."  He shrugged and got out.  "It was a favor."

"So, it's a fungal thing?"

"It's this cream," he said, handing it over.  Danny looked and nodded.  "He grabbed Xander, Xander took him apart for it but not fast enough.  We pretty well lived because Xander had a sword."

"You'll be learning now."

"I figured I would be.  Why didn't Eric tell me?"

"Not everyone can tell who's a pre or not," Danny offered, giving him a hug.  Ryan relaxed and smiled at him for it.  "Go lounge.  We'll be out in a few."

"I took him to the brothel you took him too that once."

"Good!  How long were you guys up there?  His hair's gotta be nearly a foot longer."

"Four months since they took us, three months in the ring, two days with the demonic police on their plane arguing over petty shit.  The rest was the space between when Xander was taking the head things apart at the joints."  He headed out to bum clothes and then to talk to Aiden.  She seemed fairly nice and he was probably in deep with Eric at the moment since he hadn't called him yet.  Then again, he had no idea where his cellphone was.

Danny stripped and got in to finish cleaning Xander's back, making him moan.  "Were you playing statue?"

"I was waiting to see if you were gonna yell or join me."

"Joining you is always more fun."  He checked those two spots, then went back to cleaning them for him, getting a moan.  "How much longer with the cream? Usually we heal faster than this."

"It was a pretty bad infection and it's only been a few days.  The demon healer who saw us at the demon police plane said it'd probably be gone by tomorrow.  It was pretty nasty looking."

"Still pretty nasty lookin'."  He grabbed his hips, pulling him back.  "Are you not cuddly today?"  Xander looked over his shoulder and grinned. "How did you wear it out?"

"Check and see."  Danny found the toy and smiled, pulling it out so he could have him.  Xander still moaned.  "Nothing got close enough to touch me once I woke up.  They didn't do it when they knocked us out this time either.  They put on these little locking cockrings that had a safe dial on them."  Danny moaned.  "Ryan refused to get that close because they had itty, bitty numbers on it.  So I went three months without and the brothel is using my seed to make herbal viagra now."

"Good, it's good to help others," he offered as he pulled back and thrust in again.  "Toy was too big, you're loose tonight."

"I'm relaxed."  He tensed his muscles and Danny groaned, he couldn't move.  Xander grinned at him.  "Did you want it that tight?"

"No.  Relax again."  Xander let it go and Danny leaned against his back, having him gently and slowly.  "Good boy, Xander.  You survived and protected Ryan, that was a great job."  Xander moaned and shifted his hips out.  "That's my boy.  Need more?"  That got a nod and a moan.  "My good boy.  I bet you made Ryan hot with your sword."  Xander nodded quickly this time and Danny laughed, grabbing the hips harder so he could pound him now.

"Some of the rest of us would like hot water too," Don complained from the doorway.

"You can come shower while I do him," Danny pointed out, moving Xander out of the water.  "There."

"Have him against the sink or somethin'."  He got undressed and climbed in, back to them so he didn't have to watch.  He heard Xander squeak and smiled.  "He okay?"

"Fine.  Needed that."  Danny grunted and finished up, making Xander pout.  "Have him."  He kissed him then let Xander have Flack's cock to deal with his needs.  Danny rinsed off the toy and replanted it.  "There, that way you're wearing my scent all night."  Xander grinned and licked up the underside of Don's cock, making him grab onto the shower head.  Danny steadied him, letting Xander do his worst to him.  By the time Don was finished, he was limp and smiling.  "There, now rinse him off and shower."  Xander got up to rinse himself off and let Don have the water while Danny got those spots on his back with the cream.  "Better?"  Xander beamed and nodded. "Good."  He patted him on the ass.  "Go put on clothes."  Xander went to put on some lounging jammies and go hang out in the living room.  Danny strolled out, letting Don do his sweaty hair and body again.  He found a pair of shorts to slide into and went to sit with Aiden.  She could use a good cuddle.  He wiggled in next to her, making her grin.  "Hi, Aiden."

"Hi, Danny."  She gave him a hug.  "Xander vowed to kidnap me and superglue a bikini to me if I didn't come willingly."

"He would've too.  After seeing his favorite suit to tan in, you'd have to wax a whole lot more than usual."  She punched him on the arm and he grinned. "We missed you."

"I missed you too, idiot."  He hugged her again.

"Aww," Don said as he came out.  "That's so cute."  He pulled Aiden up to hug her. "I missed you too."

"I know you did, who wouldn't miss me," she teased.  He laughed and gave her another squeeze.   "Air."  He let her go.  "So, who's got dinner or are we ordering?"

"I can cook," Xander said, bouncing up and heading into the kitchen.  "Ryan, go do the bags?"

"Sure.  Your sword goes where?"

"The room you and Eric talked in," Don told him.  That got a nod and Ryan went to put them in there and the clothes mostly into the wash, though one thing did get dropped into the bedroom.  "So, anything else come back with you guys?"

"The fungus demon got two spots on my back.  I'm still mid-healing from it so it's got cream," Xander offered as he chopped stuff.  "Omelettes okay?"

"Works for me," Danny assured him. "He makes excellent ones, Aiden."  She smiled and they sat down beside each other, squishing her between them.  "Anything we should know?"

"One of the demonic cops came down to see if something managed to migrate off his desk into Xander's things," Aiden offered.  "They're kinda squat and built like that one plain rock, mostly uncarved statue.  Looked like a pile of stones with a face."  She shrugged.  "Ryan said Xander with a sword was hot."

"He is," Danny agreed happily.  "Ryan, did you forget to call Eric?"

"I thought for sure someone did."

"We did, but he's coming in and he's not looking happy.  You should go pounce him, he's gathering his thoughts."  Ryan came out to look at him.  "Take some of the naughtiness Xander sweats and go pounce him.  Show him you're happy to be home.  It'll make him quit scowling like Speed when there's no chocolate in the machine."  Ryan shrugged and walked around the side of the house, sneaking up on Eric to pounce him against his car and kiss him stupid, knowing the others could see.  Eric said something and Ryan kissed him again, making Eric clutch him to stay on his feet.  One hand migrated into Ryan's hair and they were fine again.  Danny watched Xander's butt wiggling to some tune only he could hear.  "You need help?"

"I need noise."

Don grabbed the remote and turned on the radio for him.

"Thanks."  He smiled and mixed the eggs to start the first one off.  "I'm making western ones with ham and bacon.  Anyone disagrees, let me know now."

"That's fine, is there going to be cheese?" Aiden asked.

"Two types since one clearly needed to be used."  He glanced at Don, who shrugged.  "Someone needs to do the grocery shopping and if I'm going I'm not putting on more clothes."  He got to work turning out omelettes.

"I've got tomorrow off and I think I'm gonna do what Adam suggested," Danny offered casually.  "You'll be mine all day tomorrow.  I can order groceries."  Xander gave him a look over his shoulder.  "Yes, you.  You'll enjoy it."  Xander shrugged and added the stuff for the center then flipped it closed.  "Xander's cooking, get in here," he yelled.  Eric and Ryan walked in and Eric wasn't scowling but he wasn't smiling either. "You two okay?"

"I'm fine. I'll have to start working with Ryan and Xander now."

"I'm good at the beginning lessons," Danny pointed out.  "I can work with Ryan and you and Don and Xander.  We could all use it."

"We could," Eric agreed, sitting down and pulling Ryan down next to him.  "Hi, you are?"

"Aiden Burns.  I used ta be a CSI with Danny," she said, waving.  "Xander threatened to kidnap me and superglue a bikini on me if I didn't come down like I was supposed to.  Ryan's a very good helper too.  He helped me a lot with that case, no matter what he says.  He found a few flaws, helped set up the trap, all of that."

Eric looked at Ryan.  "Good.  You can tell H all that tomorrow.  That way he knows where your skills lie."

"Speed and I talked by phone earlier while Xander napped.  He made me tell him everything we did and everything about the case.  I, um, didn't tell him, Aiden."

"Thanks, Ryan."  She smiled at Xander as he brought out some plates with half-omelettes.  "We only get half?"

"If you're more hungry I can always make more."  He tweaked her ear and went back to it.  "Without cheese is the blue plate, Ryan.  It might have a few strands but I mostly made it without cheese."

"Thanks."  He picked up that one and a fork to nibble.  Eric looked at him.  "My stomach was a bit upset and I had to take medicine earlier to unblock it.  I don't need cheese at the moment."

"Normal stress reaction?" Eric asked.  Ryan nodded.  "That's fine. I'll baby you tonight."  Ryan smiled and ducked his head, digging in.  Eric picked up his own.  "Salted and peppered?"

"On the table."

Eric wiggled to get up and get them for everyone, tasting his first.  It did need pepper but it was good.  "Very well done, Xander."

"Thank you, it was the first DVD I watched."  He curtseyed and then got back to making some more.  "Are Horatio and Speed coming over too?"

"Not sure.  Horatio had a mountain of paperwork and Speed was working late on tests," Eric offered. He watched as Xander put two full ones on plates then grabbed keys and a t- shirt, heading off once he had wrapped the plates.  "He's going to spoil someone senseless."

"It's good for them," Don agreed as he ate another bite.  He got up to check.  "There's enough in here for two or three more."

Danny hopped up and came to cook.  He had a good hand with omelettes.  He had learned that tape with Xander.

***

Xander walked into the station and smiled at the receptionist.  "Delivering dinner for Caine and Speedle?"

"I'll call Speed," she promised, doing that.  "Detective, we've got dinner being delivered down here for you and the boss.  Of course, sir."  She hung up.  "Do you know the way?"  He nodded.  "Go ahead back there, Xander."  He smiled and walked that way, letting one of the officers get the elevator for him.  He gave them a shy smile and got on, heading up.  "He's bringing them dinner."

"That's nice of him," the officer agreed.  "He looked cute in the jammies too."  She giggled at that and nodded.

Xander walked off the elevator and looked around.  He knew where Horatio's office was but Speed was a different matter.  He saw Valera and mouthed 'Speed', getting a point.  He grinned and headed that way, finding him bent over a microscope.  "Did you want more bacon or less bacon?"  Speed jumped, giving him a look.  "I cooked way too much again.  More bacon or less bacon?"

"Less bacon."  Xander looked at the plates and handed over one with a real fork already under the plastic.  "Omelettes?"

"I've got the entire Good Eats collection on DVD and I'm learning how to cook from them.  That was my first lesson way back when before we came down."  He grinned and headed up to Horatio's office, tapping gently.  "Food?"  Horatio smiled at him.  "Here you go.  Speed wanted the lesser baconed one so you get the more bacon.  You could use the protein anyway.  I'm sure you'll need it later."  He grinned and presented him the plate, getting a hug.  "Thank you.  I'd better get home before they make me do the wash too."  He winked and strolled off, heading back to his car.  He found Frank down there looking at it.  "What?"

"Just thinking about what Don calls your Range Rover," he admitted, looking at him.  "Cute jammies.  Forget something?"

"I brought Speed and Horatio dinner since they couldn't make it tonight."  He gave him a hug.  "I get to torment Don for calling it the gaymobile."  He slid in and headed back to the house.

Frank just smiled.  You had to when that kid was bouncy and happy like that, or when he hugged you and bounced against you.  Especially when he was wearing pouting puppy dog pajama bottoms.  He went to check on Horatio, finding him and Speed eating together.  "What did he bring you?"

"Omelettes, though he did get the plates mixed up. I got a lot more bacon than H did," Speed offered.  "I can cut you off a piece if you want.  These things are huge."

"No, that's okay.  My wife's not cooking tonight so I get whatever I want."  He smiled.  "I'm not sure that they let him out wearing those pajama bottoms."

"He only lives up the street, Frank," Horatio reminded him.  "A quick trip to drop something off is fine for that sort of thing when you're Xander."

"I'm sure he's got his own rules of conduct and everything," he teased.  "So, how long have you two been members?"

Horatio looked at him.  "No comment, Frank."

"Ditto," Speed offered.

"Fine.  Which of you is which?  Because I'm still confused."

"Again, no comment."

"Ditto," Horatio offered.

Frank laughed.  "You two are so cute sometimes.  Finish up and go home before you two lose the happy mood he brought with the food."  He left, going to hug his wife.  He was in a good mood and not even rush hour traffic would stop that now.

Horatio looked at his keeper.  "Why do we still confuse people?"

"Because I'm only a few points down from you on the scale."

"Point."  He ate the bite of food Speed held out.  "Oooh, that is good cheese."

"Isn't it though?  Yours didn't have any?"

"I think it's got spots but he must've been running out of it."  He shrugged and went back to eating.  It was a very good omelette.

***

Don woke up when something small and furry crawled under his covers, yelping and throwing the sheet back.  "Holy shit!  Rats!"

"Not a rat," Aiden called from her room.  She came over to get it.  "I'm not sure it's not demonic but it's not a rat.  It was the officer's mascot but it followed Xander home by hiding in a shirt in his bag.  He loves Xander."  She held him up, making Don give her an odd look.  "It's a ferret."

"It's a big rat with a furry tail."

She rolled her eyes and walked out, closing his door for him so the baby couldn't bother him.  She stuck him in Xander's room and watched him head for the wiggling body on the bed.  Up the dirty laundry, onto the side table, then pounced onto Danny's head, making him shriek and flail, and the ferret hide under Xander's pillow.  "Xander's pet," she said once he was down to panting.  "It's under his pillow or moving behind him.  It likes him.  One of the DPP officers had him but he wanted to come home with Xander."

Danny patted around and found a furry body, picking it up to look at it.  "What are you?"

"It's a ferret.  Don thought it was a rat."

"Me too!"  He put it back onto the floor and got squeaked at and the thing went back up the laundry.  "Oh, no, no pets on the bed," he ordered.  She laughed and went back to her bedroom.  "Go cuddle up to her," he complained when it ran over his stomach and went back to nestling in Xander's hair.  He groaned and laid down, shaking his head, one arm over his eyes.

Don snuck in and looked at the creature.  "Is that a pet or a vermin?"

"Pets to some, vermin to other," Danny said dryly.  "Well, he wanted a pet and you said no cats."

"I'm allergic to cats.  That's an elongated rat with a furry tail."  He reached down to pet it but it nipped it.  "And it bites."

"It's protecting the daddy," Xander mumbled. "Leave George alone."

"Fine.  We'll talk about *George* in the morning."  Don went back to his bed and Danny went to sleep with him when the ferret tried to get into his shorts with him.  Xander got up once he was cold and followed, bringing George  The ferret sniffed them all and decided it liked Don so it settled down in his crotch and slept curled up in a small ball there.  It was almost as good as sleeping with other ferrets.  His balls were even almost the right shape for another curled-up ferret and they were furry.

***

Don stomped into work, shaking his head and holding up a hand when Frank opened his mouth. "Xander has a new pet.  It came back with him.  Don't ask."

"Would that be why your jacket's got a furry lump on the back?" Frank called.  Don slid out of it and looked, the ferret just staring at him for a moment before moving up to curl up on his shoulder and trying to get into his shirt.  "What is that?"

"It's a ferret, Xander's ferret, George."  He handed it over.  "Please give that to Danny?"  He huffed off. "I'm not playing, George."

The ferret squeaked and nipped Frank's fingers to get down, chasing after him.  It bit someone else on the way, making Eric grunt in displeasure and rub his ankle.  "It's Xander's pet ferret," Frank told him.

"George, you are not to come to work with the daddies," Ryan chastised.  "Up."  It ran up his hand and onto his shoulder, letting him cuddle and soothe it, but then it saw a tunnel and it wiggled over and ran through the duct that someone was replacing.  Then back and forth, then into a box, where it dug into the styrofoam peanuts.  Ryan sighed and chased after it, finally getting it and letting it wiggle but not get down. "You have to go home before Horatio sees you."

"Too late," Speed called.  He came over to look.  "You're a ferret."

"It's Xander's ferret," Ryan admitted.  "Somehow it's here."

"It rode in on Don's jacket," Frank called, waving.  "It's cute and fun, but it still looks like a rat to me."

"It bit me, H," Eric complained.

"Ferrets can get cranky," Ryan told him. "I made Xander do the research when he wanted to keep it.  He used to belong to one of the DPP officers."

"Knew it was possessed," Don muttered.  George escaped and went back to 'swimming' in the styrofoam peanuts.

"Lieutenant," the worker complained.

"I'll take him home," he promised, picking up the ferret and soothing it into accepting pets for now.  "Come on.  We'll make the daddy buy you a huge cage," he promised quietly, walking off with him.

"That same touch is why he's so good with kids," Ryan sighed. "I don't have that touch.  I probably never will."  He looked at Don.  "He likes to curl up with other fuzzy things.  He kept going after Aiden's velvet nightie too."  Don blushed and muttered something, heading off for some coffee.

"I don't think George went after his nightie," Speed said dryly, shaking his head as he walked off. "Come on, boys.  We've got work to do."  They followed him back to the labs.

Frank cackled.  "That's so cute.  Momma Speed and his chicks."

"I heard that, Frank.  I'm letting Xander prank you," Eric called.

"He loves me."

"Yay."

Horatio came back and shook his head.  "He'll have a cage by tomorrow," he told Don when he found him.  "He's going to help do the laundry for now. I left him crawling through the legs of your pants from yesterday."  Don shuddered.  "It's fine.  They're good pets.  He'll get used to you."

"He was already too used to us," he complained, going back to his desk.

"Apparently you reminded him of his littermates," Horatio said dryly, going to check on his crew.  Calleigh was cooing over a George story so it was a normal day.  They'd let him have her later on to show her how much trouble it was.  Though, the ferret's nature did mimic his new owner's....

No, that was a bad thought that would get Miami invaded by kidnapers or worse, Feds.

The End.

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