Harry's hand caught the snitch and he let out a satisfied smirk at his opponent before landing and proudly holding it up, earning the adoration and cheers of most of the crowd. He handed it to Madam Hooch on his way past her, leading Ron back to the changing area for quick showers, and then to their dorm room. The rest of their house would be celebrating but Harry had some special celebrations in mind for his Ron.
Draco stormed off, glaring at his father as he appeared to be smirking happily at Potter's back. "Did you bet against me?" he demanded.
"No, he just fell perfectly in line with my plans," Lucius said smugly, smirking at his son. "By the act of catching the snitch, I'll have his life ruined and his abilities and focus split." Draco stared him down. "I mined the snitch with a potent curse," he said to the dim bulb that his son turned into when he pouted.
"Father, had it ever occurred to you that I might catch the snitch?" Draco asked coldly. How dare his father do this to him!
"Son, I'm... realistic about your abilities," his father admitted, figuring it was the wisest course of action. "In this case, I knew you could not beat him, even if the hands of the Fates came down to put the snitch in front of you or made you swallow it. So therefore I cursed Potter to be incredibly... happy with his mate of choice and to make certain things happen."
"And the fact that it's Weasley," he sneered. Lucius' eyes widened. "You absolutely pompous git," he said, glaring at him again. "How dare you. You could have caught me!" he shouted, hitting his father. "I will destroy you for this, father! I will make sure everyone in the wizarding world, all around the world, knows what you did!" He stormed off, heading in to stop those two. It would cause more chaos and that was his favorite thing in the world. He kicked in the door and walked in, giving the lovers on the bed a bored look. "For your information, Potter, my father just admitted to mining the snitch with an incredibly potent fertility curse. You're probably already doomed to a life of little Weasleys."
Harry looked at Ron. "Aren't you already carrying my daughter?" he asked finally.
Ron nodded. "As far as we can tell it's a daughter, or he's a great drag queen already."
"You let your boyfriend play while pregnant?" Draco demanded. "Are you turning evil now?"
"I knew you weren't going to hurt him," Harry said with a shrug. "He's very well protected as the keeper now that Flint's not gunning for Oliver." He watched as Draco considered and fumed, then had to voice the question on his mind. "It didn't occur to him that miracles happen and you might have gotten the snitch?"
"No," he said blandly, his face hardening again. "He said he was *realistic* about my abilities. I'm the second greatest seeker in this bloody school and he does that to me!" he shouted.
Ron tried to force down the bit of maternal instinct that was welling up but it wasn't working. He was a Weasley, he had learned from his mother, and, well, he was going to be a mother soon. He slid off the bed and walked over to Draco to hold him. "Shh, I know you can do it if you're not playing Harry or wrapped up in being the son of Satan," he soothed. "I've seen you practice when we spied on you. You're decent enough." He led him back to the bed, weathering Harry's incredulous look. "He needs it," he offered quietly.
"Oh, quit," Draco said, glaring at them both. He tried to move but they stopped him. "I need to go find something to do to my father that will make him sorry he ever pulled his dick out of his pants."
"Really?" Harry asked smugly. He glanced at Ron, who smirked at him and shrugged. They had both had fantasies about the blond pecker in the bed with them, they'd told them to each other not six weeks earlier. "And here I thought you had the best revenge right now," Harry pointed out with a wicked grin.
Draco sat up, looking at him. "You'd get my ass killed."
"By?" Ron asked, stroking up Draco's back. "Besides, why would *HE* want to destroy the child of his enemy, the one that Harry would have to protect?" he asked, trying to sound seductive. He managed it until the baby made him belch. "Sorry, banana peppers for brekkie."
"That was disgusting," Draco said sourly. "Stop it." He shrugged Ron off him and weathered Ron's hurt look. "Damn, if you wanted I would have done it anyway. I'm not that complicated or girl-like. Just whip the shit out in front of me."
"Draco, being romantic has nothing to do with being femme," Harry whispered in his ear. "It has more to do with caring for what your partner likes. Like right now I should slug you for making Ron feel bad." He pinched him hard on the nipple. "Instead I think you're going to be erasing the pout." Draco looked stunned but Ron had pounced his new toy and brought Draco back to the mattress, and was quickly showing how well he knew this art.
Harry pulled his wand and summoned the snitch, holding it up to the light, then he grinned at Draco. "Here, because you can't catch it when I'm in the same room."
Draco growled, which made Ron giggle and kiss him. "Would you quit that?" he said, sounding a touch hysterical. "Your lover just gave you to me."
"Wrong way around," Ron smugly corrected. "Harry said you're to be our new sex toy." He patted Draco's chest as he straddled the little waist. "I don't know, Harry. His tummy might stretch if he touched that." He stroked the flat surface. "I'll never be that tight again."
"They make exercises for that," Draco said bitterly. "I've seen a few of our girls doing them." He touched the lump he could see now. "You really are," he said, sounding awed. "Is it odd?"
"Very," Ron said with a shrug, wiggling his lower half. "But I've almost tripled my sex drive recently. Didn't get a bit sick. Now I'm pretty, loved, and desired by many and Harry has to practice his Ron defense plans."
Draco continued to stroke the little bump. He noticed the snitch sitting on his chest and made a decision. "It'll drive my father insane and keep my life interesting," he announced, caressing the snitch gently. He loved the little gold ball. It was perfect in his opinion. He felt the curse take hold of him and shifted. It was making him want them. "Um, Ron?"
"Don't worry, we'll take good care of you," Harry promised, leaning down to kiss Draco, banishing the snitch away with his wand to get it out of the way. "Which do you think would piss him off more, Draco?" he whispered seductively. "Ron or me?"
"Oh, you, definitely you," he vowed, liking this mental plan. His father was going to shit elephants and beg to suck the Headmaster off before he was done with him. He sat up and Ron grabbed him to kiss. "No, Snape," he said frantically. "He'll kill my ass."
"He won't, he's been panting after it now for a few months," Ron promised, stroking over the blond hair. "I promise he won't. He's been giving me long looks recently whenever he catches me staring at my tummy." He lifted off his shirt and tossed it aside. "There, better," he sighed. "I hate clothes."
"I said I'd rent us a place so you could be naked all summer," Harry reminded him. "We'll do that soon enough." They stared at Draco. "I think he'd make a pretty harem boy. Don't you, Ron?"
"I'm not a bottom," Draco said firmly. "I don't suck or blow, thank you."
"Don't worry, we'll teach you how," Harry promised. "Ron's a treat at it."
Ron beamed at his lover. "Only for you, Harry. Then again, maybe we'll make him enjoy doing it to others." He shifted back so he was across Draco's thighs. "I think I like this view. Harry, help him, he's being stiff and stuffy again."
"I'm not a sex toy," Draco squeaked as Harry used his wand to strip Draco and send his clothes flying across the room. He looked down at himself, then at Weasley. "I'm average," he defended at the opening mouth.
"Yeah, all that pure blood tends to breed smaller men," Ron agreed, standing up so he could strip, then kneel across Draco's thighs again. "See?"
Harry beamed. "Don't worry, kids. We like you better this way." He stood up and stripped himself beside the bed, which made Draco stare at him.
"You...you shave?" Draco asked in awe. Harry nodded, looking quite serene, yet quite confident at the same time. "Does it feel good?"
"Wanna find out?" Ron hissed in his ear. Draco shivered and let him do whatever he wanted for now. Harry laid down beside the duo, reaching a hand over slowly to stroke Draco's hairless chest. "He's very tactile," Ron shared with a bright grin. "Harry, can I show off?"
"Sure, Ron," Harry agreed happily. Ron launched himself over, taking Harry down his throat immediately. "Ron's great, Draco. The first orgasm usually makes him the horniest creature on the planet. Give him one and he's ready for more."
Draco swallowed and nodded, reaching over to touch Harry's chest. "You're soft," he said.
"Well, I'm not, just my skin is. His mum's been making some nice oils for me to use on him and we keep spilling some," he said with a light blush.
"You wouldn't spill so much if you used it for massages instead of trying to open me wide enough for a muggle truck," Ron said as soon as his mouth was free. "I swear, it's ten inches thicker when he's in you. Plus, he's got really strong thighs."
"It's all that time on a broom," Draco told him, staring at Ron's body. He wasn't badly built either. If he had a body like either of them, he'd never wear shirts that weren't skin- tight or go around without one totally. Between these two he looked like a gawky, underdeveloped teenager.
Harry shifted closer to kiss him. "Don't worry, we'll have you properly trained and attired soon," he said with a happy smirk. "I had to make Ron quit wearing those sweaters he liked. I can do the same for you. One last growth spurt and you should be able to meet with our beauty."
"Let's try something easy," Ron announced. "Daisy chain." Harry moaned. "C'mon, Draco. You on me, me on him and him on you."
Draco swallowed but Harry guided his head down and helped him start off before latching onto Draco's body for his own pleasure. He found himself soaring in pleasure. He wasn't usually like this, but he liked it. He was being pleasured and touched, and he was doing the same. This was much nicer than the girls who simply laid there expecting him to do all the work. He nearly pulled away when he felt the damp finger breach him but it found a spot that made him lose his mind. He was seeing spots of colors in front of his eyes and his body was writhing under the assault. He had to let go of Weasley to breathe and quickly found himself the center of the action. He was like some sacrifice to them, something to be used up. Even feeling that, he still wouldn't or couldn't make them stop. Not even when the fingers preparing him left and Harry mounted him, not even when Weasley took his turn. Not even when he was so needy he was ready to do the unthinkable and pleasure himself because he couldn't get off without that - they wouldn't let him. He tried but Harry's hands stopped him, holding his hands above his head. "Please," he moaned. Harry switched back while Ron got down to please him, making him mindless and begging until he finally found release. He went limp on the bed, staring at them in awe. "It's always like that?"
"No, that was pretty normal. We've had some fantastic nights where things were much better," Ron admitted with a shy grin for his lover and a stroke of his stomach.
Harry lunged over to kiss him. "You're welcome." Ron grinned at him. "Let's curl up around Draco. You could use a rest before we start again later, Ron."
"Sure, Harry." They curled up, using Draco's chest as their pillow. He was quite comfortable. Just squishy enough to give a padded feeling. "Hey, Harry, when are you going to present Lucius the snitch?" he asked quietly.
"Oh, don't worry, it'll be before he leaves," he said smugly. "I heard him yelling in the halls earlier for Draco. He said he's not leaving until he finds his 'blasted son', as he put it."
Draco snorted. "The man needs to be fixed."
"We could always plant the snitch inside his bum, make someone get it," Ron offered.
"Ron, snitches are nice. We shouldn't hurt snitches," Harry said dryly. "Though, I'm all for a rumor that Lucius had a try at a mountain troll during his school years."
"That would be a disgusting child," Draco said with a small smirk. "Maybe a three-way with a banished goblin and a troll?"
"Nah, they've got the same sort of ears," Ron said with a giggle. "Hmm, now about..."
"Ron, no. I won't be able to sleep later from the images," Harry warned.
"Fine," he relented with a grin and a wink at Draco. "I'm sure we can come up with all sorts of ways to torture him."
"Hmm. Well, you could start by calling him dad," Draco offered. "He hates being called dad, even by me. It's always father."
"Well, technically, you'd be ours, Draco, so I guess we could," Harry agreed. He stroked Draco's stomach. "Hmm, I do believe that was a most potent curse," he announced happily. Draco moaned. "Shh, I take care of what's mine, Draco. They're pampered, cosseted, and well taken care of. Just ask Ron."
Ron nodded. "He's even snuck down to get me food before. Made some by hand since all the house elves were busy."
Draco looked impressed. He never would have done that for any of his lovers. Nor expected any of them to do it for him. "Wow," he said finally.
"Don't worry, you'll get used to it," Harry promised. "After a few 'leave me alone' moments. I had a few of those until Ron showed me how nice it was to be the caring and touchy guy I am." He stroked Draco's stomach again. "Ron, feel."
Ron laid a hand on Draco's stomach. "Hmm, strong." He looked up at Draco. "You're about glowing with the magic at the moment. When it's faded we can cast the charm to check on it." He put his head down again, going back to stroking his new toy's stomach. "Harry, I need a snack."
Harry reached out and rang a bell, bringing a house elf. "Can we have something to nibble on?" he asked politely.
"Headmaster wants yous. Hes calling for Harry Potter now."
"I'll yell at him later. You can tell him I'll be up after dinner," Harry promised. "If he gives you that look again, you can tell him what I'm doing," he offered with a grin. It was a thing with this house elf, she liked to try to embarrass the old man. She remembered him from when Dumbledore was a student.
"Fine. Misty feeds but you....." She stopped then looked at Draco's stomach. "I brings food," she said, disappearing quickly. She brought back a feast for them to celebrate with. "Misty says eat," she ordered Draco, staring at him. "Yous and babies needs." She nodded and left, going to tell the Headmaster Harry's message. She appeared next to the desk and coughed. "Harry Potters say he be up after dinner. He's say he's busy with new baby creating."
Dumbledore coughed to hide his surprise, otherwise he might have blushed. "I thought Ron already was."
"Blond, snarly ones too. Twins Misty sees."
"Really?" the Headmaster asked smoothly. She nodded. "Where might they be?"
"Thank you, Misty," he said with a fond smile, handing over a peppermint candy. "Have a treat. Could you tell Lucius I'll have his son found by after dinner? I believe Harry's going to be telling him some good news."
"Sure. Misty do." She disappeared to do that. She found him snarling in Slytherin's house. "Dumbledore says that your son be found by dinner. He knows where he is, but can't interrupt right now. He's celebrating." She looked at the person who had just squeaked, then grimaced. "Yous nasty, go bathe!" she ordered, pointing a long, thin finger up the stairs. "Bad boy! Boys all bathe after quidditch!" The boy in question ran off to do that. She had a fierce reputation around the school. Last month she had forced a Hufflepuff girl to bathe after she had perfumed herself nearly to death. She disappeared, going back to the kitchens to spread this interesting news.
Dobby squealed and hugged her for it, bouncing around happily. He'd be getting Harry special treats for months for this.
Harry walked out with his boys behind him, smirking at Draco's father when he found him. "Ah, dad," he said happily, holding up the snitch. "I believe you did something to this. You might want to consider taking the curse off since Ginny Weasley's going to be seeker again next year." He handed it back with a smirk. "So, dad, it appears we've got a lot in common." He smiled at Draco and took his hand to kiss the back of it. "Don't worry, we and the twins and Ron won't keep you up...much." He let Ron wrap himself around him and led Draco away with him. "Say goodbye, Draco," he reminded. "You're mine now."
"Bye, dad," Draco said with a wave over his shoulder without looking. "Thanks for that. I had no idea how *strong* Harry really was. By the way, Weasley was already affected."
Lucius moaned and dropped the snitch, so Ron pulled his wand and put it into Lucius' hair. He'd never notice it back there until he took it down. They all chuckled when Lucius went to his knees. "No, son. Tell me you didn't."
Harry smirked at him again. "Chaos, destruction, and power, Lucius. How could he not?" he said smugly. "My boys are wonderful and very pleasing to me." He stroked Ron's stomach, then Draco's. "I'm sure you can see what hellions these three will be. Even if both the twins are mine."
Ron nodded, giving him a goofy grin. "That's right, Draco's finally found a good home, right between us. He's *wonderful* at it already. No instruction necessary for our virgin bottom. Took right to pleasing us." He grinned at Harry. "I think we'll have to put him into some soft jammies tonight so we can lounge around."
"I sleep naked," Draco told them.
"Even better," Ron agreed with a leer. "Don't worry, Draco. We'll take good care of you. You never have to worry about nasty gits again."
Harry kissed Draco, making him go weak-kneed. "That's right. Nothing and no one touches my boys."
"Oh, someone will, Potter," Lucius vowed. "You will be stopped. Give me my son!" he demanded when Harry laughed. "I will see you stopped, Potter!"
Potter smirked at him. "Me?" he asked with fake innocence. "I'm sure, Lucius. But until then, you might want to prepare a nursery. Or would you like to move into the house the Ministry said was ours?" Harry asked Draco. "It's nice, a bit dirty at the moment, but nice." Draco opened his mouth, looking confused. "Dad's family's house," he offered.
"Oh, where is that?" Draco asked. "I've never heard of them having one."
"It's more a home than a mansion," Ron explained as he walked Draco off. "We'll sneak off this weekend to look it over again since we'll really need to work on the nursery. Plus, I need to tell my mum and dad the good news." He gave Draco a squeeze, earning a long look. "Relax. Even your housemates can't complain too much. Harry and I will protect you," he offered quietly. "You're ours now, Draco. Not even Granger can do more than snort and roll her eyes at you without earning Harry's or my wrath." He gave him another squeeze. "C'mon, Harry, we've got to meet with the Headmaster before he sends Snape to track us down again."
"Yeah, I doubt he wants to catch us shagging in an alcove again," Harry agreed, waving at Lucius. "Bye, dad. We'll call you to come in for the binding ceremony." He followed his boys, sneaking in a quick squeeze to their bottoms before they headed up the stairs. So Draco was blushing as he walked in the Headmaster's office. "Sorry, but this unbelievable compulsion to have Ron and Draco overtook us," he announced. Snape let out a strangled choking moan sort of sound, which made Harry smirk at him. "You'd be proud of Draco, Professor. His father mined the snitch with a powerful fertility curse and he's a beaut with it." He stroked Draco's bum again, making him squeak and blush, which made Harry and Ron chuckle. "He'll learn soon enough." He smiled at the headmaster, who smiled back. "You needed us? By the way, Ron offered to take Draco to the family home this weekend to work on the nursery since we're going to need it."
"Lucius did what?" the Headmaster asked cheerfully.
"Mined the snitch with a powerful fertility curse," Draco announced, clearing his throat. He swatted at Harry, frowning at him. "Not in front of others."
Ron snorted. "He bloody well almost took me in charms last week, Draco. Get used to it. Harry's a horny bastard and you're his newest treat."
Snape walked over and grabbed Draco, pulling his wand to check him over. "I'll kill you, Potter," he ground out. "Draco does not need this!"
"Oh, shut it," Harry said dryly, glaring at him, but still smirking. "He came to me, Severus. Not the other way around. Draco knows exactly what he wants and we showed him how nice it can be to be with us. It was his decision. Now, hands off what's mine before we have to have another duel." Snape slowly let Draco go and backed away. Harry looked at the headmaster again, still smirking. "Did you need anything else? We were going to celebrate some more. I've got a new one to spoil and he's never seen how truly wicked I can be in that department."
"I want him to see Madam Pomfrey tonight, boys, and have her check Ron while she's at it. Then you will have to do something about the binding ceremony before Molly and Arthur find out."
"Got that taken care of," Ron noted. Harry smirked at him. "I do. I still have to tell her that she's hosting it but I don't think she'll mind too much." He smiled at Draco. "You'll like it, mum'll make it short, sweet, and soon. Then there's the honeymoon," he added with a leer, which made Draco blush again and duck his head. "Don't worry, once the spell's set it can't happen to add more."
"You are disgusting," Snape hissed. "He's delicate, Weasley. He does not need that."
Ron snorted, giving him an odd look. "You've obviously never been this way. I had no idea how much hornier I'd become. You're damn lucky I held myself together during our last class with you, otherwise you'd have been witness to me claiming Harry's bum right then and there for being so good with the knife."
Snape let out a whimper and backed away farther. "It's a fact that pregnant people do have a stage where everything is about sex," Dumbledore said gently. "It'll be passing as the weight comes."
"Then I get backrubs, footrubs, and neck rubs," Ron said smugly. "And more sex. Or don't you remember my mum when she was carrying Bill during her last year?" Even Dumbledore blushed at that. "See?" He suddenly turned and kissed Draco, making him go weak in the knees and moan. "C'mon. Let's get to the infirmary to get that over with. Then we'll go take a long bubble bath in the Prefect's bathroom and cuddle before more sex," he said with a small leer.
Harry watched as Ron led Draco away. "Worried that we'll infect the others?" he taunted gently. "Oh, Professor, tell your Slytherins that trying for Draco is a challenge to me. Not to Ron or Draco, to me," he said in his most pleasant and happy voice before leaving to follow his boys. He found them sitting on a bed waiting while the nurse took care of someone else. "Waiting?" Ron grimaced and nodded. "Then there's a cure for that," he decided, pulling the curtains again. Draco was teased and played with until he came, then Harry and Ron got each other until Ron pleaded and begged for Harry to finish him off. Harry got a good blow out of it and Ron was limp by the time the nurse came in.
"Mr. Potter, I don't believe you needed to do that in my infirmary," Madam Pomfrey said coolly.
"Of course we did," he said happily. "We're celebrating adding Draco to our couple. By the way, he's up too."
"Oh, dear," she moaned, coming over to check the sleeping boy. "What did you do to him?"
"Blew him," Harry and Ron said.
"Plus I opened him a bit again," Harry admitted.
"And I taught him how to give one," Ron added for good measure.
"And earlier we fucked him to the moon and back," Harry agreed, grinning at Ron. "Then we finished him off and cuddled."
"Hmm, then we went to taunt his father on his behalf."
The nurse moaned. "Never mind," she said quietly. She finished checking Draco then moved to check Ron. "You both look healthy. Try to stay that way instead of injured, faint, or even sleepy."
"We try, but it's so bloody hard to keep my hands off my boys," Harry told her with a shrug and a grin. "Are we done?"
"Go," she agreed with a sigh, watching as they floated Draco off, talking about taking a long bath with him. "He'll be the death of me yet," she complained. She went back to the girl with the broken arm she had just started the healing on, making sure she wasn't going to pull a Harry and sneak out.
Ron boldly walked into the back door of his family house, kissing his mother on the cheek. "Hi, mum, hi, dad," he said as he sat down. Molly gave him a long look, her eyes narrowed. "No, we didn't fly out of the school," he teased. "I'm here to give you good news, mum."
"I can see your good news, Ron, you're glowing," she said dryly. "Who's?"
"Then you'll be marrying him," she said.
"Him and Draco," he agreed with a bright grin. "He's ours too. We're not sure if his twins are Harry's or one of each."
"Twins?" she shrieked.
"Not mine, mum, his. I'm carrying Harry's little girl," he said proudly. His father choked and dropped his fork, grabbing his water to try to stop the coughing. "Dad, you okay?" He shook his head. "Sorry, dad." He looked at his mother again. "So, mum, can we hold it here and have something tastefully small? You know how Harry can be about getting a lot of attention."
She snorted. "As if Dumbledore and Lucius would allow that."
"Lucius is the reason Draco's preggers, mum. He mined the snitch the last game with a fertility spell," he said smugly. "We've already about destroyed his world and hopes for the future."
Molly blinked and looked at her husband. "This is your son, not mine."
"Mum, it's like this with all last sons," Ron reminded her. "We're all able to get preggers and we're all perverse. Remember how you were so shocked when the twins weren't the last boys?" She grimaced and nodded. "Well, I'm a lot like Uncle Mortimer was, only I don't work with dragons and I never encouraged my charge to grab a young girl and fly off with her for fun. Harry wouldn't like that in the least."
Arthur moaned and then forced himself to stop and calm down. "Son," he said, his voice a bit high but clearly trying to sound normal. "How pregnant are you?"
"Four months and a few days."
"You knew when?"
"Two months ago," he admitted. "We weren't hiding it, I just didn't know how to tell you, and now Draco's part of it so we want to do it now."
Molly glared at her youngest son. "You're setting a bad example," she noted.
"Mum, I can always call Uncle Mortimer and Great-Uncle Sebastian to the wedding," Ron offered. She let out a whimper that sounded suspiciously like a sob. "We probably should anyway. They tried to tell you, mum, and you thought I'd be fine. Well, I am, but I'm kinda myself anyway. I'm marrying Harry and Draco, even if we have to do it at the school." He stood up and looked at them. "Or we can have it here or Harry's family's house."
"I notice you didn't say Malfoy Manor," Arthur said grimly. "Thank you for that, son."
"No, dad, that would give his mum too much influence and she came up squealing to chat with him. At least until he told her it was his father's fault," he admitted with a smirk. "And then she found out who. Let's say she's not happy for her son at the moment but she's not trying to kill him so we're impressed."
"You'll have to hold it at the school," Molly decided. "Harry's family home has to remain a bit more secret until the end of the war and I don't want half the people who'll be dropping in to be sleeping here for a few days." Ron nodded, that was sensible. "I'll get with Albus tonight over the plans."
"Harry wanted simple and I agreed, mum."
"That's fine," she agreed. "We could even do it during dinner some night. That would take care of the dinner afterward." She stared her son down. "You did this on purpose?"
"No," he snorted. "But I'm not that upset with it. Gods, think about this kid, mum. A baby Harry and Ron together, and a girl!"
"Remember, you'll have a last born son some day too, Ron," she said smugly.
"Not if this is the only one," he said smugly, strolling back out. "Thanks, mum. Harry said he'd hug you when you came up. He's presently shagging Draco again so I'm going to get in line. He's wonderful at keeping us both happy." He waved before portkeying off again.
Arthur put down his head, letting out the sobs he hadn't wanted to shed in front of his son. "Oh, Merlin," he whined. "Already?"
She patted him on the back. "He'll be raising her, Arthur, not us. We'll be able to hand back the children." He gave her an adoring look. "If Harry lets them do more than come over once a week."
He grabbed her to hug, getting in a long cuddle. "We'll manage."
"We'll manage," she agreed. "Now, we've got to call the others. Do we call Percy?"
"He'll leak it to the press."
"I doubt Lucius won't anyway."
"Good point, Molly love," he agreed, smiling at her. "Plus, you don't have to cook, feed the lot of them, or even house them."
"Yes, that's the best part," she agreed. "I will get Harry back for doing this now, but I don't have to do much of the work. It'll be different when Ginny marries of course." They went to the school through the floo to talk to the Headmaster. "Albus, they're going to have to hold it here. There'll be too many people for the Burrow."
"We were thinking during dinner," Arthur offered.
Albus looked at them. "He's your son," he pointed out.
"Yes, and it's either us or Remus plans it," Molly said smugly. Albus moaned. "So, during dinner?"
"That's a wonderful idea. We can do a temporary expansion charm on the Great Hall for the evening. Do you have a list?"
"Our family, Harry's family, and Draco's family," Arthur noted. "If Lucius brings others then that's his business."
"We're debating Percy," Molly noted.
"That's fine," Albus agreed. "I can handle that. Make out the invitations and we'll send them out. We'll set it for a month from tonight. Harry was hoping it'd be sooner but he can wait."
"Fine," Molly agreed. "I'll find someone to make the wedding cake."
"Oh, no, the house elves will complain if they don't. You have no idea of what Dobby's been planning to help those three," he said smugly. They smirked at each other. "He is the last born son," he sighed. "I had such high hopes that he'd keep the trouble down to being at Harry's side."
"Oh, he did," Arthur noted dryly. "Now they're going to be together forever with Draco Malfoy. How did Lucius do that? Did he not even consider the chance that his son might catch it?" Albus shook his head. "Stupid plonker," he muttered.
"And then some," Molly agreed, patting her husband on the hand. "Hopefully the boys got him back?"
"The last time they came up, Lucius found Harry and Ron going after his son in a most...carnal way. He yelled and screamed so his son kicked him out of Harry's room and told him that he'd see him in a few minutes, after he was done pleasing his mates." He shrugged. "They seem to be focusing on irritation at the moment. Narcissa about killed him however," he admitted, sounding happier about that. "We'll send the invitations by fastest courier," he decided. "That way this is over with as quickly as possible."
"Thank you, Albus," Arthur agreed, shaking his hand. "Ginny won't be doing this."
"Ginny doesn't even want to date," he shared. "You won't have to deal with hers for years."
"That's a promising thought," Molly agreed, leading Arthur back to the Burrow to cuddle each other.
The twins accepted the letters and looked at the official looking Hogwarts envelopes suspiciously before opening the other's. Then they choked and Fred fainted. "What the hell?" George asked in awe. "If this is a prank, it's one of the best yet." He waited until his brother woke up to look at him. "Prank?"
"Not a prank," he said, pointing at the names. "It's got Mum's name on it. She'd have killed him by now if it was."
"True," George agreed thoughtfully. "What's the 'in' gift this year?"
"Birth control," Fred noted.
"Probably too late on that," George snorted.
"True," Fred agreed miserably. "Oh, blast, I just had a thought. The Uncles are coming." George's eyes opened and he started to shake his head. "They've got to be invited if Ron's really marrying."
"At least we're not really the last born sons," he offered weakly. "Uncle Mortimer can't give us helpful suggestions again for when we get stuffed up."
"No, but I'm sure he and Ron'll have a lot of fun talking about it," Fred noted. "So, gift?"
"Gift. New clothes too. Maybe a sample case since we're going to the school."
"Good idea. Turn the tragedy into our favor."
Charlie looked up as the mail bird appeared, taking the letter the phoenix dropped in front of him before flying off again. "Huh. Dumbledore's bird. Something must have happened at the school." He unrolled the parchment, then sat down staring at it until he was licked. "Not now, girl." He stood up. "Boss!" he yelled. "I've got to head home to kill my little brother!" His boss came running, already smirking. "Here, wanna come home with me this time?"
"Just don't let your Uncle bring a dragon this time, Charlie," he said with a chuckle as he read it. "Fine. You can have the time off."
"I'm not sure I want it."
"Go. It'll be a fun time since everyone'll be there."
"Maybe, but still. Malfoy, Potter, and my brother?"
"Why is it being done so suddenly?" he asked dryly, handing the invitation back.
"Oh, don't even say it," Charlie warned. "He's the last born but really."
"Who is?" a deeper, chuckling warm voice said as another redheaded man walked into the clearing. "Problems at home, Charlie?" Charlie handed over the invitation, making him laugh for real. "Oh, this is too good. We've got to go to this."
"No bringing a dragon this time," the boss said firmly.
"Not even to help the kiddies learn?" he taunted.
"If you do, Charlie's picking it out and handling it." He walked off shaking his head. He was so glad he wasn't a member of that clan.
Charlie looked at his uncle Mortimer. "You think he's stuffed up?" He nodded. "Why?"
"Potter probably," he said with a shrug. "Molly's last letter said something about those two getting closer and how I might want to remind Ron that it can happen. We'll see in about a month." He clapped Charlie on the back. "Let's bring Bessie."
"She's a cranky bitch, Mortimer. Let's bring someone who won't try to eat the school."
"Why? Hagrid'll love her better."
"Hagrid loves any dragon. He's the one we got Norbert from." Mortimer laughed. "Fine, we'll bring Norbert back then." He went to make plans for that and to make sure he was stocked up on something to drink for the night. If not, he'd be flooing out for some.
Bill opened the tomb's last door and found a phoenix waiting on him. "How did you get in here?" he demanded. The bird sang for him and held out a roll of parchment. "For me, huh?" He took it and unrolled it, then stared at the bird in shock. "Excuse me? What?!?" The bird cooed and nuzzled him. "Oh, this is so like Ron," he ground out, but he did stay gentle with the bird. "C'mon, we'd better leave now. It'll take me two weeks just to get out of this tomb." He looked at the last door, then at him. "You think we should crack it?" The bird shook its head. "Fine. Let's go." The bird came out on his shoulder, steering him back to the easier path back up to the surface. The goblins stared at him as he came out a week and a half later. "Missive from home," he said grimly, handing over the crushed parchment. "I've got to go. He said not to crack that last door." He walked off, heading for his jeep so he could get clean. His mother would scrub him if he didn't do it himself.
Percy opened the regular letter, looking at the contents, then calmly stood up and went up to his father's office, tapping gently on the door before walking in. "I'm invited?" he asked, waving it a bit.
"If you want. The first time you open your mouth, I'm letting Ron have you. He's pregnant you know," Arthur said, not looking up at his son.
"Fine. Thank you, I'd love to attend. I'll ask for time off right away." He headed down to the personnel department to fill out a leave request form. The girl working the counter smiled at him. "My brother's wedding," he explained, handing it over with the invitation. "I'll need that back probably."
"Let me copy it, Mr. Weasley." She copied the invitation and put it with his form, then handed back the original. "I saw some great presents two shops up from Ollivander's. Including a baby bottle warmer."
"That's a thoughtful gift," he agreed, smiling at her. "Thank you." He went back to his desk, handing the invitation to his boss when he frowned. "I had to put in the papers to have the day off."
"Fine," he said gruffly, handing it back. "Try not to take more time off. You had a break for that."
"I thought I just took it," Percy said perfectly calmly. His boss smiled and clapped him on the back before going back to his office. Percy sat at his desk and worked on his paperwork, mentally making a list of what he could buy for those three. Maybe a nice fondue pot?
Ginny looked up as Ron and Harry walked Draco into Gryffindor, grimacing at them. "What are you three doing now?" she demanded, drawing the attention Ron obviously wanted.
"We're here to make an announcement," Harry said calmly. "Can I have all the Gryffindors for a moment?" he yelled. Everyone came running. "Thanks. As you all know, Draco's ours now. We're getting married in three weeks before dinner."
"We're expecting you guys'll want to have a party that night so we're giving you ample warning to get stuff the next weekend in town," Ron noted with a grin. "So, tell Madam Rosemerta this weekend in town so she knows to send a cask of butterbeer up for the house's party."
"We, of course, will be hiding in a room making a lot of noise," Harry finished. "No presents are necessary."
"But watch out, the twins'll be up with a sample case probably," Ron added for good measure. "Along with the rest."
Ginny snickered. "In other words, Uncle Mortimer's probably coming up with a dragon too?"
"Quite possibly," Ron agreed dryly, smirking at her. "Also, if anyone hasn't heard, I'm preggers and so's Draco. I know mine's Harry's little girl but we're not sure about Draco's yet. So play nicely with him."
"Or face me," Harry said, glaring at them. He kissed the back of Draco's hand. "The same way he's going to be doing."
"Wonderful," Hermione agreed, smiling at them. "It's about time you admitted you're pregnant, Ron." Ginny stared at her in shock. "You didn't see his breakfast for the last few days?"
"Well, yeah, but he's always eaten like that," she noted. "Though the banana peppers and cottage cheese were a bit odd, even for him."
Ron nodded. "But it was good." He grinned at her. "Everyone's been invited. Fair warning."
"Ooh, I'm so going to stay away from Great-Uncle Sebastian," she promised. "That old lech pinches me once and I'm decking him."
"See, if you had a boy, he'd not do that," Draco told her. "He'd nudge him and give him suggestions and threats."
Ginny gave him an odd look. "He probably would," she agreed. "Anyone want to play that role?"
"I will," Dennis Creevy offered. "You're cute," he said with a grin.
"Thanks, Dennis. I'll be sure to let my parents in on the charade so they're not horrified. Did you make mum cry, Ron?"
"No, but I think Dad did," he admitted with a shrug. "What can I say, Harry's a stud." He winked at Harry and grabbed Draco to kiss him, making him moan. "And you're adorable under me," he whispered, leering at him. "C'mon. I think it's time that I experience that again," he said as he led Draco off. "Harry, coming?"
"In a few," Harry promised, waving at the group before disappearing again.
"Are we getting them a present?" Dennis asked.
"We probably should," Dean said, still in shock. Neville squeaked. "Neville?"
"Ron just kissed Draco Malfoy," he said, his voice still squeaky. "Draco Malfoy was pregnant." He sat down. "The world's going to end, isn't it?"
Hermione got him standing and patted him on the back. "It's all right, Neville. He's changed. I saw him joking with Ron instead of picking on him," she soothed. "It'll be fine and Harry can always spank him if he's too naughty."
"He might like that," Dean said, blinking a few times. Then he shook his head. "I didn't need that image. Quick, someone give me something worse!" he ordered.
"My Uncle Mortimer once brought a dragon into Diagon and let him kidnap a girl," Ginny offered. "He encouraged him to do it." Everyone stared at her. "All last born sons in the Weasley clan are cursed to be troublesome, fertile, and able to have babies the natural way. No spells needed," she explained. "There for a while Uncle Mortimer thought the twins were last, then he decided to warp Ron when he came. He'll probably be up too."
"Just point out the one I'm to protect you from," Dennis promised with a grin. "Can I have a kiss during it?"
She gave him a long look, then sighed and kissed him on the cheek. "There, better?" He nodded, nearly swooning. "Good. Go away." He nodded, happily going back to his homework. She looked at the older boys. "If we do, we might want to give them something practical. Mom'll be killing Ron soon."
They all nodded. That made sense. Those future orphans would need a lot of stuff when Ron's mother had to take care of them after killing all three parents.
Remus walked into the Headmaster's office waving his invitation. "What's this prank?" he asked dryly.
"It's not one," Albus admitted with a hearty sigh. "They're together and two of the three are pregnant." Remus stopped moving, eyes wide open. The Headmaster got up to pour him a brandy and hand it over. "Ron's having Harry's and we're not sure about Draco's. They're either twins of Harry's or one of each."
"Did no one ever have the birth control speech with that boy?" he demanded.
"Let me get him for you so you can yell at him yourself," Albus offered with a smirk. At last, someone would yell at Potter for him. Even Snape wasn't touching this one because it might upset Draco. He summoned a house elf. "Find Mr. Potter and have him brought up here."
Dobby nodded and went to find Harry, knowing where he was. "Harry Potter, Uncle here to see you," he announced, breaking into their quickie between classes. "In office."
"Really?" Ron asked as he joined them. "Gee, sounds like Remus got his invite." He stole Draco with a smirk. "Have fun, Harry, and I suggest you put that away," he said with a nod at the hard cock that was sticking out of Harry's pants. "Draco, would you like some soothing?" he asked with a smirk. "You look like you could use a few good massages." He took Harry's place and went back to what they'd been doing.
Harry trudged into the office. "You couldn't wait for ten more minutes?" he complained. "I was in the middle of making Draco fly again."
"He has a broom," Remus said firmly. He glared at his nephew. "We will be talking, young man."
"Sure, Uncle Remus." He sat down, this looked like one of those talks. "Did you hear, Ron's having my baby girl." His uncle's eyes narrowed so apparently he had heard that already. "Draco's having twins."
"Harry, did we never tell you how to prevent that?" Remus demanded. "I know Ron's fertile, but really!"
"We used the spells and the potions, it still happened. We're not upset about this, Uncle Remus."
"Harry, has it occurred to you that you'll have a war to fight in soon!" he demanded, his voice starting to get louder. He didn't even notice when the Headmaster escaped.
"Yeah, and I know just what I'm going to do. We just sent him a present of a poison. Not that he'll realize it's slowly seeping the magic from his body, but it is." He grinned at him. "I'm happy, Uncle Remus. I adore my boys. They're mine. I'll be protecting them and what they carry. We'll be going to the family home by the way."
"You'll be paddled within an inch of your life!" he shouted. "How dare you ruin your future this way, Harry! You could still die!"
"Uncle Remus, if I die, then I know that they've got each other and the kids," he said calmly. "You notice I'm not pregnant?" Remus stopped and stared at him so he nodded. "Really. We go all sorts of ways. Draco had my bum last night for a good, long ride. His dad mined the snitch our last game and he came to me. He's mine. I know what I'm doing. Well, my daughter was an accident during Herbology," he admitted with a sheepish grin. "Madam Sprout interrupted so I think I botched the charm that day, but otherwise it's all been planned. Once Draco came to us, we knew what we were going to do. Besides, I like it when my boys play," he said with a wink and a grin. "They're very pretty when they go at each other."
Remus covered his ears. "I did not need to know that, Potter."
"Sorry, Uncle Remus. Anyway, we do know what we're doing. Draco's morning sickness started early and we've already found out how to eliminate it for him. It seems his body wants to have more of us in it and that seems to cure it. Ron didn't have a bit of it and he's in the horny stage so we're all good there. The plans for the battles are going well. Severus and I have been working on a few things together. Hence the poison we just sent him. Even Narcissa likes us together now that she knows what happened. Lucius is missing a few pounds of flesh from her nails, but he's decided I'm not a bad son-in-law so he's ignoring me. He thinks he'll be using me as a present for the Dark Lord and I'm actually using him to get closer to end this battle. He's not real fond of me otherwise, but then again he's the one who put the fertility spell that got Draco on the snitch."
"But...but you caught that one," Remus said, looking confused.
"He told Draco he knew he wasn't going to catch it. Draco's favorite thing is chaos," he said smugly. "His whole house is jumping at shadows because he's had a mood swing on them," he finished with a giggle. "During dinner no less."
It was at that point that Remus realized he had lost control of the situation. He shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Harry, I wish you would have thought this thru a bit further. It's dangerous to them."
"No it's not. Anyone who touches either of them faces me head-on and I'll be the last thing they ever see," he said dryly. "You forget, last year I spent taking intense lessons in dueling and hexing from Professors Flitwick and Snape. Apparently there was a great dueler in the family history."
"Your Great Uncle Alex," he agreed bitterly. "He'd have loved you, Harry. You're a bit like him. He was a careless bastard too." Harry glared at him and it nearly made him flinch. "Fine. You've got your plans. I just wish that reality would have intruded in on them, Harry. This is not what a man your age needs to worry about."
"It is so," he said as he stood up, moving closer to hug him. "Ron's my first baby. Draco's my second one and the babies will be just as special to me. I've got plenty of plans, Uncle Remus. Be happy for me. You don't have to worry about me being happy. I've got what makes me happy. I'm spoiling someone greatly by fucking them multiple times a day."
Remus shook his head to clear the flashback. "I didn't need to hear that, Harry," he advised. "I heard enough of that from your father when you were being carried." He patted him on the back. "Let go. I've got things I've got to do today, including finding a gift for you three. Any idea what you want?"
"Something pretty," he suggested with a grin. "For the nursery. Three kids," he said happily.
"Three?" Remus squeaked.
"Draco's carrying twins, but we're not sure if they're both mine or one's Ron's. Doesn't much matter to us, but still." He gave him a smug look. It almost oozed 'am I a stud or what' by his uncle's look. "I'd better get back to Charms. I'm hoping the other two made it there." He left after another hug. "See you at dinner that night," he called as he trotted off.
"You'll be seeing your father in your nightmares if I could do it," he muttered, shaking his head. The Headmaster came back. "I'm in control," he admitted. "He's happy about this! Perfectly happy!"
"He has the confidence of the young that everything will work out," Albus gently reminded him. "I thought it was a good idea to have him learn to duel. He seems quite a lot like his ancestor."
Remus grimaced. "You think?" he asked dryly. "You said the same thing about James."
"Yes, but Harry's got the power to back it up," he said wisely. "Alex would have been proud of him, even though he had children. Alex hated children," he said at Remus' confused look. "It's too bad he died about fifteen years ago. He would have been the perfect person to send Harry to and to have raise him." He sat behind the desk. "I believe they're decorating the nursery in blues and greens if that helps. Possibly in magical creatures."
"Fine," he said, walking out shaking his head. He wished Sirius were here to yell at the boy. He was the last one and he obviously wasn't getting through to him. Maybe if he could find a medium he could call all three of them back to talk to them. Or intervene and have Snape help him. He turned around and headed back that way, going to talk to the cranky bastard. He tapped on the office door, hearing him in there instead of in his classroom. "Severus," he said when the door was opened. "I want yo to help me call back Lilly, James, and Sirius if possible to yell at Harry. He's not listening to me."
Severus blinked a few times, then shook his head. "We can't."
"We can so," he snorted. "You've got talents as a medium. We can do a seance and have them called back as spirits to torment the smug little bastard for botching up his birth control."
Snape closed his door, willing to at least hear about this. It would make Potter miserable.
Ron looked around the family home, smirking at Harry. "Who did this belong to?"
"Dad's family. Mom's family had a home too but it burned a few years back, when I was about five."
"Who was she? I thought she was a muggle born," Draco said, looking at the ...nice family home. It wasn't shabby, dirty, or odd. It looked like a normal house.
"No, she wasn't. She was the last daughter in a line of daughters though. Apparently her mother was not a happy camper with the family so she left. Aunt Petunia was a squib, but Mom was a Dumass." Draco stared at him in awe so Harry beamed at him. "I'm compared a lot to my Great Uncle."
"You should be, you look like him a bit. You're strong like him. You're also as reckless as he was," Draco agreed. "He was one of the best curse breakers ever."
"He trained Bill," Ron told him. "When he died, Bill took his job."
"Wow," Draco said, looking at him in awe. "Does he have anything of Alex's? Some books maybe? I heard he was a diarist. They could help Harry."
"I've asked but Bill didn't write back," Ron admitted, opening the door. "Come up. I'll show you the nursery. It's still dusty and nasty. We've got to hire someone to come clean the place before we decorate."
Draco followed him up the stairs, noticing they didn't creak. "This is well constructed." He touched a wall, feeling the spark of magic. "Plus very warded."
"Dad's dad was fanatical about that," Harry agreed, heading for the library. There were books in here that he wanted. Including one on his other family if he remembered right. He found it and pulled it down to flip through while Ron and Draco explored the house. He had a thought. "Don't go into the attic," he yelled. "There's a portal of some sort up there!"
"Yes, Harry," Draco called back.
Harry went back to his book, reading up on his relative's exploits. They seemed a lot like the Snape's to him. Possibly dark, but very strong and powerful. He decided to bring that book back with him and grabbed a few more to look through. His grandfather on this side had done some work with the Defensive Charms department when it was still active at the Ministry. His notes were invaluable.
"Harry, we found the bed where you were born!" Ron called. "It's marked even."
Harry decided his research could wait. This was too special to miss.
Harry walked Ron and Draco into the Great Hall on their wedding night, nodding at the Headmaster, then at the teachers. He hadn't known that Snape was able to perform bindings, but he had the book and was standing in front of them.
"As you all know," Dumbledore called, ending the chatting. "Messers Potter, Weasley, and Malfoy are being married tonight. That's why we have so many alumni in with us tonight and why those three are going to be disappearing for the rest of the weekend to a room hidden in the castle. Now, if you'll stay silent we can get this done and on with the feast." He sat down, nodding at Severus.
Snape coughed to clear his throat. "Do you, Harry James Potter, take this wizard, Ronald Weasley to be your spouse?"
"I do so take him and all our family together," Harry said firmly.
"Do you also take Draco Malfoy as your spouse?"
"I do so take him as well, equal and as important to me as my Ron is. He is mine and what's in him is mine. Our children will be protected and loved as well."
Snape sneered at him. "Quit ad-libbing, Potter." He looked at Ron, who looked a bit green. "Do you take Potter as yours?"
"I do take Harry as mine. I also grant him rights over my body and take my due rights over his."
"Do you take Malfoy?" he demanded.
"I love to take Draco," Ron quipped, and heard his mother groan. "Sorry. Yes, I do take him as mine, all mine to share with Harry."
"Mr. Malfoy, are you willing to join in with this duo of lunatics?" he demanded.
"I do take them as mine and gift them with the product of my body," he said in a shaky voice. "They are mine as I am theirs. We are all equal and special together." He nudged Ron. "No more dirty thoughts," he hissed. "My mother will want to coo." Ron shuddered and kissed him. Snape hit him on the head with the book. "Sorry, sir. Got a bit carried away," Draco panted, leaning against Ron to grin at Harry.
"Do hurry up," Harry encouraged dryly, smirking at him.
Snape glared at him and spoke slower. "Potter, do you agree to take the children of this union, whether yours with them or theirs together, as your own?"
"They're my kids, no matter which one of us they came from originally," Harry said, making 'speed up' motions.
Draco coughed and slowly inched a hand up Harry's arm, teasing him and making him shiver. "I do so agree to take the union of our bodies as my own, and as Malfoy heirs. No matter which parents they come from, they're little Malfoys to me."
"Me too," Ron agreed, wanting this to be over with.
Snape glared at him this time. "Do you also pledge to protect them as they do you? To give up your life as necessary?"
"Nearly done that already, should be obvious," Harry and Ron said in unison, then smirked at each other and shared a kiss. Harry beamed at Draco and kissed him as well. He looked at Snape again. "They're in that stage," he whispered. "Unless you want a floor show, I'd hurry up."
"I now pronounce you bound and mated." He stepped back as they three of them kissed each other again and again. "Enough." Still going. "Enough!" he yelled. Ron started to go for a grope. He hit Draco on the head with the book, then got Potter again. "You have time for that later. Do not do so in front of us."
"Especially not in class," Madam Sprout said, blushing greatly. "Present them, Minerva?"
"I hereby do present the trio of Malfoy-Potter-Weasley and now we can eat if they'll sit down," she ordered, pointing at the special table for them. They all sat and fed each other as soon as the food appeared. She looked at the Headmaster. "I think we'll have to set some rules about hallway conduct. I walked in on them the other day, Albus. They were using my classroom!"
"We'll talk with them later," the Headmaster agreed. "After they're done this weekend." He patted her on the hand. "Severus, come sit?" he ordered. Snape moved to his usual seat and sat down. "It's usual that we have a toast."
"To my babies," Harry called, grinning at what was his officially now. "However should we do last names?"
"Potter-Malfoy, Potter-Weasley, and Malfoy-Weasley," Draco said with a shrug.
"Sure, Draco. If you want," Harry agreed with a grin. "Ron?"
"Fine with me, Harry," he agreed. He leered at Draco. "Hurry up so we can cut the cake and disappear."
Draco ate faster, then they ran up to the cake, cutting it and feeding each other a piece before anyone could stop them and disappearing in a flash of light from a helpful house elf or two.
"It seems they were impatient, but I'm sure they'll be back out later," Dumbledore said fondly, smiling at Molly.
"Oh, they will be," Molly promised smugly.
Ron met with his Uncle the next morning, after breakfast in bed being the plate, giving him a long hug. "You managed to come and they let you bring a dragon?"
"Charlie's in charge of Norbert," he said with a grin. "You like him that much?"
"Oh, hell yeah," he agreed happily. "It's a girl by the way." He patted his stomach, then his eyes widened. "I think I felt her move."
"You may have. I know I did." He ruffled the red hair, then winked as Harry came over to help Ron by rubbing his stomach for him. "He said he felt her move."
"Wonderful news," Harry agreed, kissing Ron on the back of the neck. "I should reward you for that."
"Harry, I'm still open from where you rewarded me for waking up," Ron said dryly. "Why don't we reward Draco later?"
"Because he's sleeping again. I just wore him out." They both looked at where Draco was sleeping on a bench in the sun. "He's beautiful."
"He is," Mortimer agreed happily. "You happy, Harry?" Harry nodded. "Good. Then I'll make sure Norbert leaves you three alone." He winked at Ron. "Remember to follow Sebastian's lead since he's the last of us who fought."
"Oh, I seem to," Ron agreed dryly. "Where is the cranky old codger?"
"Inside giving Ginny tips on how to handle being pregnant from her boy. Poor girl, doesn't know he adores that one himself. He'd probably take that young man from her if he could." He winked at Harry again. "I'd try for you but Charlie warned me not to."
"I doubt I'd share, Uncle Mortimer," Ron said dryly, smirking at him. "We found out something interesting. Did you know Harry's from a Dumass line?"
"Really now?" he asked, sounding interested. "Good. They needed to continue. Poor things, mostly taken by a plague." He patted Harry on the head. "You be good to my nephew, or you'll be facing me before you face his family. Remember that."
"Oh, I will," Harry agreed happily. "Where did you guys spend last night?"
"Gryffindor, like all good Weasleys do," he said smugly. "That Granger witch is some brain. Needs to be in Ravenclaw."
"She's our helper," Ron said proudly.
"Interesting. Maybe I should have Sebastian chat with her too. Or do it myself," he admitted with a sly look at them. "If she doesn't fall for Bill." He strolled off. "Protect what's yours, Harry. You'll need 'em soon. Remember, Ron, that'll be opening soon and it'll be *delicate*."
"Oh, I always do," Harry called, walking Ron back to where Draco was napping. It was nicely centrally located so the family could find them if they wanted to. The twins had already found them and chewed him a new one for getting Ron pregnant. Bill was the first one who found them this morning. "Hey, Bill, how was the party last night?" Harry asked with a gentle grin for him.
"Interesting. Someone liquored a few of the butterbeers and handed one to Hermione. She ended up dancing on top of a table before she flung herself at Neville and let him put her into bed. "
Ron grinned at him. "Did you know that Alex was Harry's Great Uncle?"
"No, I didn't, but that makes sense. He looks a lot like the git," he said with a fond grin. "Bastard when he wanted to be too. But that does make my present all the more important." He pulled it out from the back of his waistband and handed it over. "For you three 'cause I figure you'll need it. Alex had those in his packs when he died. They're his work diaries." Harry looked stunned but eventually got up to hug him. "Just remember, Harry, you protect Ron or else Uncle Mortimer won't be the first of your worries."
Harry beamed at him. "I always protect Ron. He's one of my favorite things. Him, my broom, and Draco. Not in that order," he said with a wink for Draco.
"Fine. You behave with them. Make this the only child from Ron or else you'll have a last born son too," he said wisely.
"One of Draco's might be mine," Ron offered.
"Hope and pray it's a girl then."
"Yeah, but then girls are worse," Ron reminded him. "This one'll be a princess long before she knows what one is," he said with a stroke to his stomach. "I swear, I feel her moving again." Bill reached out a hand, then nodded. "I am?"
"You are. She's a strong girl, Ron, like mum. Harry, if I find more of Alex's stuff, I'll forward it to you. We weren't sure if there was any family left after the plague."
Harry misted up and hugged him again. "Thank you, Bill."
"You're welcome, Harry. Now let go before you get me all damp and one of those blasted little girls coos at me again." Harry laughed, pulling back to wipe his cheeks off. "Yeah, you and Alex were a lot alike. Maybe someday I'll tell you more about him. But only if you survive the war."
"He's toast, he simply doesn't know it yet," Harry said smugly. "Ron's an excellent planner and Draco's wicked, dirty mind is all that I needed to kick mine into high gear." He winked at Draco again. "Now, who's my naughty one?"
"I am," Draco said smugly, raising his hand. "I'm the one who made him send the idiot a poison coated vial of his blood and semen. Tainted of course," he added with his trademark smirk.
"At least you three are insane in the same way," Bill noted, heading back inside to go to breakfast. "Charlie, they're outside. Draco's glowing like marble, Ron's feeling his little one move, and Harry's horny."
"From what I heard, that's not a big shock," Charlie said, handing down the bowl of scrambled eggs. "Give him your prezzie?"
Bill nodded. "I had an old diary of Alex Dumass'. Speaking of, Harry's of that line."
"Wow. Small wizarding world sometimes," Charlie said smugly. "I'll give 'em mine after I eat. I'm sure Norbert won't have picked up a girl by then. Doesn't seem to like them much."
"I saw Mortimer heading inside."
"Even better." He ate quickly then went outside to find the new trio. "Boys," he called, making them all frown at him. "You are. You're not fully adults yet." He stopped to look down at them curled up together. "Though you're close enough for this," he decided, handing over his present. "You'll find it'll help with the babies too."
"What is it?" Ron asked as he unwrapped it. "It's a dragon rope?"
"It's a leash for when you've got to take them into public," he said dryly. "It's also good to teethe on and to be used as a toy."
"Thanks, Charlie," Draco said happily. "I'm sure at least one of these children will need a leash in public."
"Probably mine," Ron agreed, smirking at his big brother. "You wanna pat my daughter?"
"Ron, that's disgusting and I hate kids," Charlie reminded him. "Keep the pregnant cooties to yourself." He backed away. "Harry, did Mortimer feed Norbert yet?"
"Hagrid did last night," Harry offered calmly. "Does this mean you won't be babysitting?"
"Hell no," Charlie snorted. "I hate kids."
"Which means you'll have a family like your own," Draco said smugly. Charlie shuddered and hurried on. Ron pinched him, making him smirk at him. "He will."
"Only if he has them himself. He can't date down there, complains that there's no one down there to date."
"I'm sure he'll find someone. I know Hermione likes him," Harry said casually, kicking back and relaxing. "Okay, we've had Mortimer, Bill, Charlie, and the twins so far. Who's next? Wanna take bets?"
"I believe I see my mother," Draco offered, pointing her out as she came out the front door. "She's got that determined look so apparently my father kept her up all night again." He waved his mother closer, smiling at her. "Hi, mum."
"Draco, that is not how you address me."
"I'm one now too," he reminded her, stroking his stomach. "Twins, mum."
"Yes, I heard," she said grimly, handing over a package. "It's shrunken. It's got all of your baby clothes in it plus the heirloom blankets and such. Open it when you get home."
"Thank you, Narcissa," Ron said softly, smiling at her. "It's a thoughtful gift. I know Draco wants to turn all three kids into Slytherins."
She snorted. "He had better at least have one who is. It's a family tradition. That will be the Malfoy heir."
"Mother, they're all Malfoy heirs as far as I'm concerned," Draco said quietly. "Even Potter's daughter that Ron's carrying. They're all mine, like I said yesterday."
She pursed her lips. "We'll discuss this later, Draco."
"Mother, there's no discussion on this subject. Besides, by the time they're sorted there's every chance you won't be around to cry when they all turn into Gryffs or all turn into Slytherins."
"The hat wobbled on me," Harry admitted. "I had to beg and plead not to be one."
"Your Great Uncle was one until he was kicked out for being such a good shag with everyone in the tower," Draco told him.
"Harry, you're not going back to those bloody relatives of your ever the fuck again," Ron said firmly, startling Draco and Narcissa. "I don't care if they suddenly become saints or some such. You're never going back. If they so much as talk to you, I'm having Snape destroy them. He will you know."
"He won't," Draco said dryly.
"He would if he knew," Ron told him, eyes narrowed. "Trust me on this." He looked at Harry again. "Promise me, Harry."
"You mean I can't tell them the good news?" Harry asked dryly, smirking at Ron to diffuse the quick temper.
"Harry, would you like to explain why Ron just went into a panic?" Draco suggested calmly.
"I'll tell you some day," Harry told him. He looked at Ron. "I don't plan on going back ever, Ron. You know that."
"Promise me, Harry."
"Fine, Ron, I promise. Unless there's no alternative I won't even talk to them." Ron relaxed and nodded. "You get to tell Draco why."
"Fine," Ron agreed. He looked at their other husband. "Harry's relatives are worse than your house believes that muggles can be."
"That's possible?" Narcissa asked.
Ron nodded, still looking at Draco. "Not even the fat, stupid, lazy bastard that's his cousin can live up to the stereotypes you guys put on them he's so far beneath them."
"Maybe we should pay a visit then, simply to tell them the good news," Draco said.
"No. We're not going," Ron said firmly. "We went once. Ask the twins or mum. They all remember that day."
"Ron, calm down," Harry said, trying to keep him calm. "We never have to go back to Privet Drive again if we don't want to. Not even to destroy the house while they're in it." Ron nodded, relaxing against his side. "Sorry about that, mum, but he's a bit strong on that point. I agree, but I don't care enough at the moment to care."
"Why?" Narcissa asked.
"Think about it, Narcissa. What would make me, Harry Potter, into a perfect Slytherin? What would make the hat waver so much that I had to beg and plead not to go there?"
She swallowed. She knew, or at least she had an idea. "Very well. I'll leave that in your hands. Son, I will expect you home for dinner after school ends."
"Of course, mother. Or you could come to our place," he offered. "How's dad taking it?"
"He's drunk, Draco. Still." She walked off, going to talk to her husband. Maybe she could goad him into using those muggles for now.
"Ron, she's going to get my father to deal with them," Draco announced.
Ron shrugged. "That's too good for them in my opinion."
Draco nodded once and looked at Harry. "Should I try to stop him?"
Harry shrugged. "I don't care. They're protected in their home."
"Fine," Draco decided. He'd be staying out of that one. Or at least he'd be asking Molly Weasley when his mates weren't around. He noticed one of the Slytherins coming their way. "There's Pansy. Ooh, and Greg and Vince are coming too. They just came out the door," he noted. He got comfortable again, putting his head into Ron's lap. Ron's hand automatically came down to stroke through his hair. "That's nice. Keep doing that."
"Sure, Draco," Ron agreed lightly. He smiled at the people walking up to them. "He's not napping, just enjoying it," he offered when they stared at them.
"You corrupted Malfoy," Pansy accused. "We don't like you, Potter."
"Do I care?" Harry asked. "Draco's allowed to have his friends. We won't keep him from hanging out with you guys."
"Slytherins don't hang out," Draco noted, looking up at Pansy. "I'm happy. You're blocking my sunlight." She moved. "Thank you. Did you come out here to complain, wish us well, or tell me that I'm kicked out of the house?" he asked, closing his eyes again.
"No, we decided we're not shunning you," Vincent Crabbe said quietly. "Are you really okay, Draco?"
"We stopped the morning sickness, I'll be fine," Draco said happily enough. "Ron, there's an itchy spot just an inch back. Would you mind?" Ron scratched it for him, making Draco sigh and stretch. "That's nice. Thank you."
Goyle looked at Potter. "We really don't like you but if Draco does and it's obvious he does, then we'll not stand in your way or get in your thing with him unless he needs us to step in and kick your ass."
Harry nodded and shrugged. "Okay. Thanks. I'd expect it if I ever hurt him."
Pansy looked stunned. "You don't care?" she demanded.
"No, I have no plans of hurting or using Draco. He came to us, Parkinson. I like that about him. He makes his own decisions and he lives with them. Draco is now mine and I take care of what's mine, but that doesn't mean he's not allowed friends. I learned that lesson when Ron and I started to date."
"Fine," she agreed. "As long as you know. Draco, the whole house chipped together to get you some baby clothes. There's even the cutest little black velvet cloaks for them." Draco grinned at her. "We'll bring them to Potter's room if you don't want to come down and get them."
"No, I'll be back Monday night for them and to spend some time with you guys," he promised. "Thank you, Pansy."
"Not an issue," Goyle promised. "You're really happy?"
"I'm really happy. Harry and Ron take better care of me than I was doing and they care more than my parents do."
"Fine," Crabbe agreed. "As long as they continue that trend." The three Slytherins walked away together.
"If you three wanted to, we'd help you plan how to get together," Ron called after them, smirking at them when they all turned shocked looks on him. "It was kinda obvious, Parkinson."
"We've already got our planned. We're waiting like most students until we graduate," Goyle said with a smirk as he walked his mates into the school.
"That is one scary trio, and they once offered me a place in it," Draco announced. "Pansy's got this leather outfit that she wears around them. Goyle likes to be spanked."
"We didn't need to know that," Harry said, breaking into any further thoughts of that nature. "Oh, Merlin, please, take that image from my head?" Ron kissed him, making him go limp and moan. "Mmm, better, thanks, Ron," he said with a sappy grin. "Draco, want one?"
"I'd have to move for that," he said, shifting slightly to get the fingers in a different spot and to move his legs so they'd wake back up. "I'm liking this."
"We could do this in our bed," Ron suggested. He leered down at Draco. "I could even pet you better there."
"We said we'd be out here so no one had to find us," Draco reminded him. "Just another hour, until after breakfast is over with, then we'll go hide again until dinner."
"Okay," Harry agreed happily, breaking into Bill's present to start reading. "Wow. It starts off with a date and how he just got done with a set of quads. Two boys and two girls."
"So that's where you get it from," Draco said with lazy sensuality.
"You know, I bet Snape knows more about that family," Ron said suddenly. "He knew a lot about dueling."
"True," Harry agreed. "I'll talk to him later this week, after I go through this diary." He flipped the page to the next entry. "Hmm, a witch and a belly dancer. I didn't know they slept around."
"In the same person or different?" Draco asked, holding out a hand. Harry handed it over with a smirk. "He must have been about sixty at the time," he said in awe. "He could still do two women at once at that age?" He handed it back. "I want to learn more about him too."
"Sure, we'll research him together," Harry agreed with a grin for Ron. "We'll ask Hermione if she knows any books about him."
Ron smirked. "Like she doesn't have the entire contents of that library memorized."
"Then we'll have her pull them for us," Harry said with a grin and a shrug.
"Or you could ask me yourself," Snape said from behind them. The three men grinned at him. "I assume you're talking about your Great Uncle Alex, Potter?" He nodded, holding up the diary. "Bill's present?" Harry nodded again, looking expectant. "I did meet the man. He could be cold and cutting at times, but not bitter. He had a dry wit and skills that most wizards could only beg and plead or make dark deals for." He handed over a book of his own. "A family history. I thought it might amuse your... mates to see what you could turn into."
"I doubt I'm going to be doing different people each night," Harry said dryly, but he was smiling. "Thank you, Professor Snape. It's a very thoughtful gift." He flipped through that one. "Hey, his grandmother was great in defense."
"He also wrote some books on curse breaking," Snape admitted. "They're in the charms section of the library." He crossed his arms. "Are you ill, Mr. Malfoy?"
"No, sir, just comfortable," he said happily. "Ron is a good pillow and he pets me very well." Harry and Ron snickered. "Not that way, you two bloody pervs," he said tolerantly. "At least not in public or at the moment."
"Do try to keep it out of the public's view," Snape ordered before walking off. At least they were going to treat Draco well. Anything else and he'd have to step in and kill them. Which was a happy thought but he'd probably die from it when Draco found out. He nodded at Molly as he walked past her in the halls. "They're outside lounging in the sun. I just gave Potter a book on the Dumass clan."
"Interesting," she agreed with a smile. "I knew Alex, met him a few times."
"We were related," Snape admitted, turning to look at her. "As is Potter."
"That makes so much sense," she sighed, shaking her head. "That poor thing." She walked out, going to talk to her wayward children. She found Harry now lounging in Ron's lap and Draco curled up against Ron's side while they read the book together. "Quite comfy?"
"Very," Harry agreed with a grin for her. "Hi, mum."
"Harry, I didn't give birth to you." He pouted at her so she relented. "You may call me that as long as Ron is taken care of in a manner I deem more than appropriate. If he's so much as upset..."
"Then he can go mood swing on the Slytherins again," Harry said with a grin, smirking at Ron when he poked him. "You did."
"I might have, but they've been good to all Gryffs since then."
"That's because you made Pansy cry," Draco said dryly. "It took Crabbe and Goyle nearly an hour to get her calmed down again." He looked at Molly. "Should I call you Molly, or mother?"
"Mum is fine, Draco. I know they dragged you into this."
He snorted, shaking his head. "I asked, I didn't get dragged anywhere. I knew what I was doing when I went to Harry and Ron's room."
She looked stunned, then sighed. "Fine. If you're sure. Ron, I pulled out our cradle, it's in need of refinishing but I think we can do that soon enough. Did you want us to keep it at our house or are you going to need at the new one?"
"The nursery's got one large crib," Ron said thoughtfully, looking at Draco, who shrugged. "How about we leave it at your place for now, Mum. Since mine's going to be about four months older I'm not sure if we can put them all together or not. Besides, this way they can come visit and take naps while you explain things to me, like how to soothe tummies."
She nodded. "That's fine. As long as you do the actual raising."
"Mum, I'm not letting you turn my daughter into Ginny," he said dryly. She frowned at him. "I'm not. Think about it, mum, she'll be worse than the twins probably."
"Once she starts that, one of you will be coming over with her," she said smartly. He nodded, grinning at her, knowing she didn't mean a word of it. "As long as you're happy."
"We are," Harry agreed, grinning up at her. "How did you get Percy to come?"
"We invited him and he made the decision." She handed her son an envelope. "From your father and I, to start school funds." She left them there, going back inside to sob on her husband's shoulders. Her son was married and pregnant!
Ron glanced inside, then whistled and tucked it into Draco's pocket. "Hold that for me so I don't lose it."
"Sure, Ron," he agreed, tucking it further inside and doing a sticking charm on it. "It's really sunny out here."
"We've only got Percy, the Gryffs, and Hermione," Harry reminded him. "Unless your father's going to come out."
"If he does, you can duel him," Draco said with a wave of his hand. "He'd deserve it."
"Deal," Ron agreed, going back to reading this new book. It was kind of fascinating. Harry's maternal line had been like the Snapes and bigger bastards at time. "Hey, they were rich," he said in awe. "Harry, you might have to do something about that."
"We might," Harry agreed. "I don't know how though."
"Ask Dad, he'll help," Ron offered. "He'd love to help because it'd mean we'd be taken care of."
"Sure, Ron. Anything for you two." He wiggled his head until he was more comfortable. "Your thigh's really well muscled, Ron."
"I try, Harry. It's all that running after you."
Harry smirked up at him. "Not this time."
"Nope, not this time. This time I'm going to be fat and round, and decorating." He grinned at Draco. "You may be able to run after him."
"No thanks. I saw the bastard and he's not worthy of my pissing on him."
"Hmm, true," Harry agreed. "Think I could do that and kill him with it?"
"Only if you drink a lot and then light him on fire," Ron offered.
"I could probably do that too," Harry agreed happily. "Thanks, Ron, needed that idea."
Ron and Draco both snorted and rolled their eyes. Harry and his ideas.
Later that night, Draco was exploring Ron's body and found the small opening starting behind his balls. "What's this?"
"Birth canal," Ron said grimly. "It'll be fully open before the birth and then it'll disappear until I need it again." He shivered when Draco's fingertip, all that would fit into it, teased him. "Draco," he moaned. "Please."
Draco smirked at him and bent to lick the hard cock while his finger played. "I like that," he said between licks. "Soon I'll have that part of you too, Ron."
Ron moaned and shifted, but Harry kissed him and Draco continued. He went limp, letting them play. Draco went down to tongue it for a few minutes then went back to his playing with the cock and the hole. "Draco, please," he whined. Draco shifted up, rubbing his own cock against that spot, making Ron whimper. "Please?"
"It's not deep enough for that. I guess I'll just have to use the one you've already got open." He slid into the one he had prepared earlier, after their baths, going as slowly as he could to draw it out. Harry licked his finger and came down to help with that, sucking on Ron's cock at the same time. Ron let out a squeal and arched up but his husbands had complete control of his pleasure. This was torture! He was going to die from this! "Shh," Draco ordered. "Don't want to bring someone else running to help." He shoved back in harder the next time, making Ron arch off the bed. "Let us, Ron. You deserve being pleasured that way. You've done it to me enough times."
Harry smirked up at Draco. "Keep it up, and I'll be doing it to you once Ron's passed out."
Draco shivered and worked himself harder. "Will I have one of those?"
"Nope. That's a special part of the last son curse on the Weasley clan," Harry told him. "You'll have a different way of our twins coming out." He kissed him then went back to teasing Ron until he gave up and came with a scream of pleasure. As soon as they had Ron tucked in, Harry pounced Draco. "Your turn," he said smugly. Draco shivered but let Harry have his body any way he wanted. He had been trained to be still if he was on the bottom of the relationship and Harry made it seem much better than the others did. His mother would be proud. Harry had his ass and his soul now instead of just having his ass.
Ron walked into a room he had never thought to visit again. "Professor, can I ask you for a favor?" he asked quietly, glancing around the empty classroom.
Professor Snape gave him a dry look. "What sort of favor, Weasley?"
"I want you to do the checking charm on Draco to see which one of us is the father of the twins." Snape looked stunned. "I don't want to go to Madam Pomfrey for this. She considers this some sort of perversion between us. She's already told Draco that he should terminate and to do the 'right thing' in this case. He's not in any danger. Harry heard that and had him drug to the hospital just in case, but they never thought to see what they were or whose they were. I'd like to know so I can tell my mum and dad."
Snape considered it. It was a minor favor. "You can't do it yourself?"
"I'm scared of botching it," Ron admitted. "I thought I had when I did it on myself. Besides, my magic's going odd and Harry doesn't seem to want to know beyond the sex."
"Fine, I will do so. It can only make Mr. Malfoy happy." Ron beamed and started to move closer. "If you attempt to hug me, I shall have to kill you, Weasley," he warned. Ron gave him a sheepish grin and nodded before leaving. Snape relaxed and rang for a house elf. "Find me Malfoy, send him down here so I may speak to him." The house elf nodded and left to deliver the message. Soon Draco walked in, looking curious. "Weasley let slip about what happened with Pomfrey. Are yo all right, Mr. Malfoy?"
"Fine, sir. Thank you. You called me out of Transfiguration for that?"
"No, Mr. Weasley also asked me to do the charm to check the children for him." Draco's face lit up and he nodded, stripping off his robe so he could take off his shirts. "That's not necessary."
"It is so, the charm works better on bare skin," Draco noted, shivering in the cool room as he stepped forward. "Please?"
Snape cast the small charm under his breath, noticing the glow around the stomach. "They're both boys." Draco all but danced. "And they're one of each," he finished. Draco stopped to stare at him in shock and a bit of awe. He nodded. "You can tell them or not, but Weasley said he wanted to know so he could tell his parents."
"Thank you," he said, lunging over to hug him. "You're the best." He sniffled as he hurriedly put back on his clothes and headed back to his class. He smiled at the teacher when she frowned at him. "It's all right, he wanted to check on me." He sat down between his husbands and smiled at them.
"Well?" Ron demanded quietly.
"You may as well announce it," McGonagall said dryly. "What are they?"
"Boys and they're one of each," Draco said, smiling at his men. Harry passed out and Ron turned pale but managed to stay awake.
"So, in another eleven years we'll have a Weasley son," she said, smirking at Ron. "The first or the last, Mr. Weasley?"
"I don't know, ma'am, but if it happens it does." He kissed Draco soundly, then Harry when he started to come around. "Oh, that's good news," he said happily. "It's a boy."
Hermione patted him on the back. "Relax, Ron, you three can celebrate later." She turned her attention back to the teacher. "Professor, can we move onto clothing now?" she asked.
"Of course, Miss Granger. Thank you for reminding me where we were." She started back in the lecture again, going over how to change a hemmed area down, like to lower a bustline or a waistline. She noticed the wicked look just before Harry's wand flicked at Draco and he squeaked, grabbing his ass. "Ten points from Gryffindor for making his pants cheekless, Potter," she ground out.
"Oh, damn, these are the only ones I have," Draco hissed, swatting Harry. "Fix it."
"She hasn't told us how to do that yet," Ron said helpfully. He looked at the teacher, who moaned and started to open her mouth but the gong rang and she shooed them out with a smirk on her face.
"I can't go out like this!"
"Your robe covers it," Hermione reminded him. "You've got Herbology next anyway. Then you can change."
"I don't have anything else clean," Draco said frantically. "I can't go out like this!" He refused to move, even when Harry and Ron stood up and tried to help him up. "No, I can't go out there like this! How dare you do this to me!"
"Shh, Draco. You've got a pair of jeans," Harry soothed. "Come on, I'll help you find them. And if not, you can wear some of Ron's or mine." Draco pouted but he followed Harry back to their room while Ron went to Herbology and tried to explain what had just happened. They all heard McGonagall burst out laughing once they were gone. Harry walked behind Draco. "You know, I like that look on you. Your robe highlights the best parts of your bum." Draco glared at him and Harry smirked. "Sorry, Draco. I won't do it again."
"You'd better not or you're buying me new clothes, Potter," he said firmly. He noticed Crabbe and Goyle staring at him. "What?" he demanded. "He just had an accident in Transfiguration."
"I accidentally removed some of the material from his pants," Harry said with a shrug as they headed up the main stairs.
"Where do you think you're going?" Flitwick demanded.
"To get him into pants that have an ass in them?" Harry suggested as they moved past him. "My error in transfiguration, professor, sorry."
Flitwick looked stunned, then burst out in giggles, heading back to his room before anyone else could catch him giggling in the halls.
"You know, this gives me wonderful access to your bum," Harry said, reaching up under the robes to touch the cool globes of his bum. "Hmm, you're chilly. Hurry up so I can warm you up."
"I'm trying," Draco ground out. "Get your hand off my butt cheeks." Harry gave him one last caress then let him go slowly. "Thank you." They walked into their room and he slammed the door in Harry's face. Harry came in a moment later and kissed him, getting down to pleasure him and show him how wonderful pants like that were. "Now is not the time for this!" he said frantically.
"It's always the time for this," Harry said smugly, one finger sneaking up to play with the exposed flesh and what was hidden between them. "I like these on you, Draco. It gives me wonderful ideas and access." Draco moaned, caught up in what the finger and Harry's breath were doing to his body. "Should I get you redressed or give you more?"
"Just something quick," he ground out. "That way we don't get into too much trouble." Harry dove down to pleasure him, making him whimper and cease caring about how his ass was exposed in these pants.
The time moved forward for the boys, happy enough in their own little world. Ron's baby had been born and scared Draco to no end but Harry had soothed him and Ron told him it wasn't so bad. So when Draco went into labor, he wasn't sure why Harry took him into the bathroom. "Don't I get a nurse?" he demanded.
"Once you're clean," he soothed, putting on the enema nozzle they'd found in a closet. "Now, bend down, let me do this right so you don't have any problems."
"How are they getting out?" Draco demanded. Harry turned him around and stripped his pants off him, then wiggled a finger up into him, touching a spot that had made him wonder before. "What's that?"
"The birth canal's opening," he soothed. "Let me clean you out so the babies don't have problems, Draco." He got a shiver in response so he tested the water before moving it up him and flipping the switch to activate the nozzle. They'd played with enemas before to get Draco ready for this, even though he hadn't realized, but now Draco was into it. At least until the next pain hit, then he tensed up again and Harry had to stroke and soothe him. He got Draco cleaned out and then cleaned up before taking him upstairs to the infirmary. "All clean," he announced. The mediwitch gave him a long look. "I helped Ron deliver his, I can help Draco if I must. But could you please call Molly and his mother? She demanded to know when." He helped Draco up onto a bed and out of his clothes, covering him with a sheet. "Now, Draco. Your water will be breaking soon. When it does, I want you to let me know. After that, the babies will come and you'll want to push. I want you to push."
"I have to pee," he said quietly, staring at Harry.
"Let me get a urinal for you." He went to retrieve one, coming back to help him use it. Then it was put aside as Draco had another one. "This'll be just like earlier, only it'll be a harder push to clean it out. Then we'll put you in a bath and that spot'll close up again," he soothed as Draco came down. Madam Pomfrey came in and he gave her a look. "Helping?"
"Yes, I am. You are not qualified to deliver them yourself, Mr. Potter. No matter what you may think."
"Will this hurt?" Draco panted as another one hit him.
"Probably," Harry admitted. "You're allowed to yell and scream at me and you should probably be stretched. Want me to do that?"
"It's not necessary. The babies will do that."
"I'd rather not have him rip," Harry said, glaring at her. "Would you mind calling his doctor and Snape as well?" She left and his fingers drifted down. "Let me stretch you a bit, Draco. It'll make it easier." Draco clutched his shirt as a finger entered him. "Shh, you're doing fine. You're beautiful and it's going well. Within a few hours you'll have two sweet little boys in your arms," he said soothingly, continuing to stretch him. When Snape came into the cubicle he gave him a look. "I'm stretching him."
"As is expected," Snape agreed. He checked Draco's stomach. "I told her I had studied the procedures and we would be doing the birth together." Draco nodded, sobbing as the newest one crested. "Try to relax, Draco. It will be soon. Your inner canal is dilating right now. That's where the pain's from. Potter, continue what you're doing. You know how large newborns are. Twins are usually a bit smaller but he'll need as much room as you can get him." Harry nodded, concentrating on that. Draco whimpered. "Try not to hit the edges of the birth canal. Did you clean him out?"
"I did," Harry reported. "Two warm water enemas without soap."
"Good. That's for the best." He smoothed back Draco's hair, staring into his eyes. "It will be over soon. Maybe this will not happen again."
"I was happy until this dragon shite started!" he shouted, clutching at him as an intense pain happened. "I think something just broke."
"Your water did," Harry agreed, moving to let the fluid out. "Soon, Draco. I'll be helping."
"Fine," Draco panted. "I think I need to push." He strained and pushed but nothing seemed to happen. "Oh, come on! Come out already!" he whined when his second push didn't get any results.
"Push with the pain," Snape ordered gently. Draco nodded and pushed with the next pain and this time he felt something move. Snape checked him again. "Hmm, there may still be a blockage. Potter, do you have your wand on you?"
"Yes, sir." Harry used it inside of Draco's body to test the birth canal. Draco whimpered and tried to crawl backwards but the next pain hit and the baby started to come down now. Harry's wand was tossed aside as the baby started to move, letting him be ready to catch him. The first came out and he quickly move it out of the way, letting Snape cut the cords while he caught the second. "Excellent, Draco," he praised, smiling at him. "See, it wasn't as bad as Ron's. The shorter canal makes it go faster."
"I feel nasty," Draco said hoarsely. He looked at the children Snape was cleaning up. "They need baths. I remember where they came from."
"They do," Snape agreed, taking them to personally see to that, with Weasley since he was waiting. "Who has your daughter?"
"The Headmaster. He's pacing with the mothers." They got the babies into the sink and cleaned up quickly, then he took the one with dark hair out to get the mothers. "He's fine if you wanted to come in. It went quickly."
"Did he tear?" Narcissa demanded.
"No, I stretched him," Harry said, grinning at the boy in Draco's arms. "Is that one mine or Ron's, Professor?"
Snape cast the parentage charm on it then smirked. "That one is Weasley's. The other is yours." He took the baby to hold, cooing at it. "I see you do like one best?"
"Well, Draco's got him and Ron's about to take his. Then we'll switch," Harry said as he checked over the babies. They switched and he cooed at the other one, making it look confused but it was alright in his book. "Yes, hello, I'm one of the daddies, little Damien Weasley. And that's your brother Howell Potter. Yes, you'll be happy with your sister Andrea." He kissed the baby on the head, then held him out. "Want to hold him, mums?" Narcissa took him and Molly took the other, and they both looked at the other babies. "No daughter?"
"The Headmaster wasn't in the hall," Ron said with a shrug. "I doubt it was a real problem."
"No, he went to get McGonagall probably," Snape agreed. "Mr. Malfoy, would you like to be cleaned up?"
"Yes, please," Draco ordered weakly.
"C'mon, Draco. We'll go take a bath. I know it made me feel better," Ron soothed, helping him up. "We'll keep Harry away from there for a few weeks," he soothed.
"Please. I'm sore."
"Of course you are," Ron agreed. "So was I. Harry's tongue was a great thing though and it helped me feel better, but I won't let him touch you if you don't want him to."
"We'll see. Right now I don't want anyone to touch me or look at me," Draco said weakly. Ron picked him up, making him squeal and clutch at him. "Put me down! I'm not that light!"
"You're not that heavy," Ron promised with a grin, taking him down to the Prefect's bathroom. The students they passed stopped to watch. "He just had the babies," he explained a few times. By the time they got to the Prefect's bathroom, it was already waiting on them and just barely above body temperature, plus it had Draco's favorite bubbles in it. "Thanks, Headmaster," he called, knowing who had done it, or at least ordered it done. He settled Draco into the tub and picked up Draco's sponge to work across his tired body. "You rest, Draco. Let me pamper you like Harry did me," he soothed. Draco nodded, his eyes drifting shut. "You're wonderful. The babies are healthy and perfect. You're beautiful and I'm proud of you."
"I'm still not doing more than blowing you for the next few months," he said dryly.
"Not an issue," Ron promised. "Whenever you're ready, we are. I can keep Harry satisfied until you're ready to be touched, or even let you have Harry's ass again," he promised. "I know he liked it the last time you did. The babies kicked him while you were leaned over his back and he grinned up at me." Draco let out a slight chuckle, sleepy sounding noise that Ron knew meant he was nearly asleep. "Dream of the boys protecting Andrea, Draco," he whispered. "They're going to protect and love her until she whines about not being able to date a real boy." Draco nodded, falling asleep under Ron's skillful touches. Ron continued to bathe all the sweat off his lover, letting him rest. He deserved it. He'd just had twins the hard way. "Love you, Draco Malfoy," he whispered. "You are Merlin's gift to wizards. You and Harry both." Draco shifted and got a kiss for it. "Sleep, Draco. You need your rest. The babies will want to eat soon." Draco mumbled something and Ron laughed. "That's right, you can," he promised. "Or we can make Harry do it."
Upstairs Harry had to resort to pouting to get his sons back. He sat down with a bottle for each of them, casting floating charms on them so he wouldn't have to hold them. He looked over as his daughter came back. "Finally here, huh?" he asked her, grinning at her. "These are your brothers. I'll expect you to be nice to them and not beat them up all the time, Andrea. Think you can do that for the daddies?" She babbled and cooed, wiggling in the Headmaster's arms. "Shh, daddy will hold you in a minute, let the twins have some nummies first," he soothed, leaning over to kiss her. She scowled at him so he grinned. "That's my baby girl," he praised.
She grinned and kicked at the Headmaster's stomach, liking this a lot. Let the others have the daddy. They were her new toys. The other daddy had said so.
Harry and Ron looked at each other, then let out a whimper. "ALEX!" they yelled in unison. He came jogging up the pathway.
"This thing is perverted," Ron said, pointing at the mirror they were in front of. "It just showed me preggers!"
"It just showed the two of us and Draco in a three-way with Draco and Ron pregnant," Harry corrected, his eyes wide. He didn't know you could do some of those things.
Alex Dumass, curse breaker and all around bad guy to evil things, scratched the back of his dark hair while he read the words on the mirror. "Huh. It's a mirror of alternate realities."
"If that really happened somewhere, I'm going to puke," Ron announced. "I feel sorry for the me there. Having to be married to Harry and the git you took in. Plus, kids?" He shuddered. "I had a birth canal! It appeared! Like a girl, Alex!"
Alex gave him a long look. "You know, with the curse on your family's last born son, it's entirely possible, Ron. Fortunately you like girls." He smirked at him. "Leave the mirror alone, boys. Come on." They nodded, following him back so they could forget that horrifying experience. They both looked at Draco when they caught up with him. Then they both shuddered.
"What did you say to them this time, Alex. I told you I'm not sleeping with your grandson, no matter how much it might help him."
"No, they were just in front of a mirror of alternate realities."
"You were pregnant by the both of us with twins."
"How did you get that scar on just above your left buttcheek?" Harry asked. "It looked like one of those that comes with a story."
Draco gave him a long look, then shook his head. "I fell out of a tree when I was five. The branch got me." He looked at Alex. "Can we destroy that one?"
"No," he snorted. "But we can find a way to give it to Sev," he said with a mean smirk.
"As long as he doesn't see the reality we just did, I'd be glad to never see it again," Ron agreed.
"Me too," Harry said, nodding hard. "It was odd seeing us fuck Draco into the bed night after night while he was having our twins. Or while Ron was having my daughter."
"Are you sure we can't destroy it or send them there?" Draco asked, staring at his lover. Alex nodded. "Absolutely certain?"
"Oh, Alex, if we could use it, the war's still going on over there but apparently you died in that attack instead of being deaged. They were trying to turn the me there into you. Snape was helping."
"I'll see if I can't copy some books and send them over," he agreed dryly. He patted them on the back of their heads. "Let's heft the rest of these boxes up to the surface and then we'll figure out how to move the mirror." They nodded, getting back to work.
"How would a male give birth?" Draco asked.
"In the case of most of the spells that can do that, a small canal is opened from your anal tract to the womb," Alex explained. "How was the spell done?"
"Lucius mined the snitch with it," Ron offered as he came back. "Then he insulted Draco and that's why he came to us."
"To cause chaos, I have no doubt of that," Alex said dryly, smirking at his nephew. "Did he shit out the twins?" They nodded and shuddered again. "It's okay."
"Hey, I grew a real one," Ron said bitterly.
"Again, you like girls so it's not a problem, Ron," Alex reminded him. "Get back to work for now and then you can get drunk to forget it." They nodded, working faster so they could do something about that mirror.
"Severus," Alex called as he and Draco carried the mirror down the hallway of the school. "Open up!" The classroom's door opened and the Potions master got out of their way. "The boys found this. It shows alternate realities. Want to keep this for us and study it as a project?" he asked with a grin. "It's fantastic. I saw one last night where I had decided to play pro and was still living. I got to raise Harry from day one."
Snape gave him a long look, then a shrug. "It would have entertainment value I suppose."
"Weasley and Potter saw one where we were a trio and Weasley and I were pregnant," Draco told him.
"Or nightmares," Snape noted, looking at Alex, who nodded. "Fine. Put it in my office. That way no Hufflepuffs can find the thing." They nodded, picking it up and moving it again. "Can't use magic on it?"
"I'm not sure it won't open a portal to there," Alex admitted as they tucked it into a bare corner. They wiped off their sweaty faces. "Have fun, tell me what you figure out." He patted his son on the arm as he walked away. "Come on, Draco, so I can make you pretty and clean again."
"Yes, Alex," he sighed, but he was leering at his lover's back. Bathing was always fun with Alex.
Snape walked up to where the mirror was, looking for any further inscriptions. He cast a light spell behind him, just in case there might be some magic restrictions around it, and the mirror came to life. He stepped back but watched as another version of him walked up the halls. He noticed his robes were a bit looser and that he was walking oddly. "What is going on?" he muttered, stepping a bit closer to get a better look. The mirror reached out and sucked him in, only letting him get out a squeak. He found himself in the other body, and now he knew why he was walking funny. He was pregnant. The startling fact happened and he had to shudder. It was Potter's child.
"Are you all right?" a quiet voice asked from the shadows. "You looked like you shivered."
"No, I'm fine," he found himself saying, having to watch as his body did odd things with Potter's. He couldn't control it and he couldn't make it back away from the other man. And Potter was a man in this one. Clearly beyond his education. Potter put a hand on his stomach and he felt the baby he carried kick. He would have to get Alex back for this. Even if he didn't know, he would be dying horribly at his hands.
"Fuck, Sev, you're magnificent like this," Potter breathed, bending to kiss him again, one hand still stroking his stomach. "I'm so glad you agreed to do this for me."
"NOOOOOOO!" Severus Snape yelled and found himself expelled from the mirror, until a new image started and pulled him back. This time he was with Malfoy and they were both naked and sweaty, while the other Death Eaters looked on.
"Yes, they will make the perfect vessels for the seeds to grow," the Dark Lord was saying as Lucius worked his spell in the corner.
Severus could feel the appliance in his body and he knew Draco had one as well, somehow he was sure of it, and that in the corner Lucius was mixing the ingredients together to insert into the other end of the appliances. He and Draco would be carrying the first children of the next generation. Not Voldemort's since his seed was dead. That's why Lucius was mixing someone else's with the Dark Lord's. So the taint would go onto the child but the father would be whoever had the live sperm going into the other ends. That left out most of the senior death eaters, but he knew that at least one of them would be from Lucius' line. He remembered watching as the same thing was done to two captive witches the night earlier to make sure it had worked. He struggled to get free of this body but it held him tighter. Apparently this version of him needed his help to steady him mentally. Then maybe he could be released.
Lucius stepped up and moved closer. "This one," he said, holding one vial aloft, "is Draco's. The other is Severus' own, Lord. Are you ready?"
"Do it," he ordered, watching like the pervert he was as Lucius poured the mixture into the correct device with a smirk. "Now, you are bound. Severus, take good care of your boy because I will be watching over you two and your children. They are mine as well," he noted.
"Yes, Lord," he and Draco panted.
"Finish this, boy. Please your new master."
Draco shifted up again, pleasing Severus so they could get off and the spells would be set and permanent. Severus tried to hold on but Draco was skillful and wonderful at making him come. He panted in Severus' ear. "I'm yours, Sev. Pleasure me finally," he pleaded. Severus found his hand moving down to stroke the aching cock, releasing the ring on it. The boy bit his lip and arched up into his hand. "Please, please, let me come!" he shouted.
"Come," he ordered quietly. Draco complied then went limp across his chest, giving it little kitten licks. "Good boy, Draco." He stroked the shivering shoulders. "Get him something to cover him before he catches cold. That would kill him at the moment." A robe was put across them and he held still while he felt the spell go through his body. He finally felt it take and let out a deep sigh. It was done. Draco shivered as the appliance was removed by their Lord's hands, as they had been inserted, and Severus held still while his was moved. Well, it was twisted around a bit first and then removed. "Thank you. May we retire?"
"It is your honeymoon," Lucius sneered. "Why my son chose this position instead of the glory he could have had, I'm not sure. He deserves better."
Severus stood up and grabbed the dagger they had used earlier to do the blood binding their Lord demanded, stabbing Lucius with it in the chest. "So I could do that for him," he sneered as his former friend died. He helped Draco up and around his father's dead body, taking him to a room in the mansion they were using this month. He had been correct, this was their honeymoon night. "I'm sorry I did that in front of you."
"I'm not," Draco said smugly. "Thank you. It saved me from doing it. How do you feel? We bear the next Dark Lords in our bodies, twins born of the blood and the power of magic." He moved closer. "Will you believe me now, Severus?" He stroked his sweaty chest. "See, I do know what I had planned when I suggested this."
Severus kissed him. "That is true, you did, my dragon. Come, we should rest."
"Fuck resting. I want more. I didn't get to have you earlier." He put his former teacher onto the bed and gently slid into the open and waiting hole. "Ooh, this is what I wanted for so long."
"Then hurry up so I can have mine again," Severus said dryly.
Draco leaned down to nip him. "If you behave, I might even let you have me like you used to, Professor. On my knees and pleading for your attentions." He moved quickly, knowing he was tainting the spell. His seed would overwhelm the Dark Lord's. They would still be tainted, like Potter had been when he had been alive, but they would be the ones to rule this world after the present Dark Lord died in another ten hours. If Severus' potion was spot on, which Draco knew it was. He spent himself quickly, knowing that Severus would be making him pay for it. Which he always enjoyed. He willingly spread out for his lover, wincing as he was roughly entered, but he liked it that way. He was Snape's bitch and he enjoyed the position too much to ever go against what he wanted. He wrapped his legs around the trim waist and pulled down the darker head to kiss him softly. "Take me, Severus, like in the old days."
"In the old days I made you ride me yourself if you wanted it that much," Severus reminded him. "And then I would bend you over the desk to get my own pleasure."
"I remember," Draco said smugly. "More, Sev, or should I ride you again?" he teased.
"Keep it up, I still have those toys we bought the last trip to the dark arts sex store, Draco. I'm sure you'll love that one troll-sized one I found." Draco moaned and let him do whatever he wanted. "Thank you." He made it good for the younger man, he always did. Draco came with a scream of pleasure, his hands clawing up Severus' back. "That's better," he said smugly. "Want more?"
"Merlin, Severus, I always want more. Simply give me a chance to recover," he moaned, allowing his lover to leave his body. He curled up against his new husband's chest. "Did you buy the normal one or the erect one?" he asked as he teased the firm chest.
"Both. I thought they might come in handy. Even if I did have to hand one to McGonagall so she would get the hint to leave me alone."
"That erect one was another foot longer and an extra eight inches around," Draco said thoughtfully. "Hand her that one, Severus. Only let me see when you do."
"My poor darkling, are you bored?" he asked, stroking over the sweaty back. "We need to bathe."
"We can't for a whole day because of the spell. Water will make it deactivate."
"Hmm, very well then," he decided. He heard feet go running past and smirked at his lover. This plan had been flawless. Someone burst in on them and he gave them a bland look. "Yes?"
"The Dark Lord is dying, Severus. What was in that potion?"
"Nothing harmful unless he had some human blood left," he offered. He sat up, bringing Draco with him. "Should I come look at him?"
"No, the healer is," he said thoughtfully. "You both stay in here."
"Of course. Where else would I be going on our honeymoon?" Draco asked smugly. He casually let one hand fall onto Severus' thigh so he could tease it. "Wanted to watch us some more?"
"No! You two are disgusting!" he said, slamming the door. He went to report to the healer, finding his Lord and Master already dead. "You couldn't save him?" he demanded.
"No one could," she said with a sneer. "He was poisoned. Whatever he took made his blood cells explode in his body. It was horribly painful and gruesome in my opinion." She put her wand back in her pocket. "Now, I'm going to leave before we have another invasion. Where are the newlyweds?"
"In their room. Did they do this? Severus said it was only harmful if he had human blood still."
"It may have been. I also heard Severus tell him that." She walked off, going to help Severus out of there. He was now in a fragile condition, so was Draco. She'd be taking over their care now. They were carrying the next Dark Lord and she knew that Draco had messed with the spell somehow. She tapped on their door before walking in. "Come along," she ordered. "I'm taking you back to the school." They nodded and grabbed their clothes from where they had taken them off earlier. She took them back to the school and personally warded their doors so nothing and no one could harm them. Then she took off her illusion, becoming Harry Potter as he walked up to report to the Headmistress. She gaped and he grinned at her. "She was pretending to be me, I kept up her disguise for the last two years," he noted. "He's dead. Severus and I did it together. He's having the next Dark Lord and so is Draco. They're in their rooms. Ron and I are going to do the tainting ceremony now. Need me for more?"
"No," McGonagall breathed. "Come back soon, Mr. Potter. Bring back my Defense teacher in one piece."
"Of course I am," he smugly agreed, going to do the ceremony with Ron and the twins. They knew Severus and Draco could feel the taint leeching from the children's body to be replaced with the purest taint in the universe, that of love and purity. Ginny had given some of her virgin's blood for this. They finished and went to lie down. It had sexually charged them but the twins weren't sleeping with Harry anymore and Ron wasn't sleeping with them at all. So they'd have to sleep together while Harry and Ron had some spectacular sex together.
Severus reappeared, panting hard. He checked his clock, only ten minutes had happened in this time but there it had been nearly a year. He hadn't wanted to know that much about being pregnant or giving birth. He backed away from the mirror before it could suck him in again. He found his new wife and pounced her. "Save me," he hissed. "The mirror pulled me in. I had to give birth to Draco's child. I was pregnant with Potter's in another world."
Holly took him to their suite and laid him down on the bed, making him forget everything that had happened to him in the last six hours on this planet. "I'll protect you from Alex, Sev. Never worry about that," she soothed as she got him out of his clothes and only cuddled him. Or at least that was her plan, just some simple cuddling, but he flipped her over and had his way with her, proving he was manly by staying on top and making her get as high as he could as many times as he could. Apparently he had his own cure for such nightmare images.
Up in Hufflepuff, Ron was doing the same thing. The images he had seen were enough to make him ill. He had told Dawn what they had seen and she had jumped him right then and there to help him erase them. Not even the older kids kicking them up to the upper year's common room had changed that. Not even noticing that it had purple velvet all over and purple faux fur pillows and a globe light was enough to take his mind off Dawn's version of mental healing. Let Harry do it his way, he had his girl for these things.
Harry walked back into the practice grounds pale and shaking. Bear, one of the non- native beaters and his buddy, saw him first. "What has happened?" he demanded. "Were you injured? Did someone die?"
"No," Harry said weakly, giving him a hug. "We found a mirror of alternate possibilities. I was shagging Ron and Draco and they were pregnant for me." Bear looked stunned and Harry nodded. "Yeah. I'm going to have nightmares for weeks."
"Come, we will find Oliver and have more of that amusing fire whiskey you have around here."
"Don't we have practice?" a coach called. "Potter, you still alive?"
"He was exposed to something that showed him alternate realities. He was sleeping with Ron and Draco and they were having his children."
"Never mind, go have a few," the coach agreed, waving them off. "I'll send Wood to find you two and put you both into beds at his place." Harry ran over and hugged him, letting out a squeak of hysterical laughter. "Bear, take him somewhere near the Leaky. That way it's easier on Wood."
"Of course." He led Harry off to a pub he had found, it was reasonably close and they could floo into the shop if they had to.
The Defensive coach went to report to the main one. "They found an artifact that showed alternate realities. Potter was screwing Malfoy and Ron, and they were both stuffed up from him."
"That's why I sent Bear with Potter while he went to wipe that out with liquor. I promised I'd call Wood to put them up for the night."
"I wonder if it was a mirror," the main coach said thoughtfully. "I've heard of that, it was stolen by someone who wanted what they saw."
"Don't know, you'd have to talk to Dumass about that. If so, maybe Harry and Ron can get a finder's fee or something." He went to call Oliver through the floo. "I know it's your day off, but Potter just ran into an artifact that was not giving him happy mental images. He and Bear are out getting soused by you. Can they have your couches?"
"Sure," Oliver agreed. "How bad could it be?"
"He saw an alternate him who was shagging his pregnant lovers, Draco and Ron."
"Interesting," Oliver noted. "No wonder. Harry's firmly het, the fact that it was blokes probably got him the most. I'll find 'em and take care of 'em tonight. Maybe I'll even get a few in myself." He hung up and went to tell the twins, who looked stunned, then shuddered, and Fred went to get sick. "I didn't think it'd be that bad."
"Think about those kids," George explained. "A Potter-Weasley? A Potter-Malfoy? A Malfoy-Weasley?"
"Did Harry have a sister who wanted to surrogate for Malfoy?" Luna asked as she walked up to the counter.
"No, he and Ron found an artifact that gave them viewing rights to an alternate dimension where Harry was shagging Ron and Malfoy, who were both preggers," Oliver explained.
"That must be the mirror they delivered to Professor Snape," she said with a wicked smirk. "Hmm, I wonder what he saw. He was said to have run out before his next class and run right for his wife's arms." She put down her purchases and her money pouch. "Here, Ginny and I need them for some of Dawn's housemates again. Ethan told me I'm not allowed to conjure air elementals to give them bad hair. He told me it was like showing off."
Fred came back and gripped the counter but he did ring her up. He even gave her Ginny's discount since they were going to help Ginny with her crusade to make some stupid girls leave Dawn alone, and Dawn was nearly their sister-in-law. He handed over the bag with a weak smile. "Have fun. Tell Snape we support him if he wants to break that stupid mirror."
"Sure." She headed back through the floo, finding McGonagall on the other side. "It was either visit the twin's shop or do them harm myself," she said with a sweet smile. "They're starting again you know." She walked past her, going to her next class, but handing Ginny the bag in the halls. "From the twins."
"Miss Lovegood, you have a detention with me tonight," McGonagall called after her. "No matter what the reason!"
"Yes, Professor," she and Ginny called. They smirked at each other. "I found out why Snape ran off."
"Really, give?" Ginny demanded.
"That mirror lets you see alternate realities. Harry and your brother saw one where Harry was shagging Ron and Malfoy, and they were both knocked up. So apparently Snape saw something that was equally sickening. By the way, your brother threw up upon hearing that."
"Wicked," Ginny said with a grin and a wink. She ran for her next class while Luna walked out to magical creatures. She noticed Professor Flitwick's look at the bag from the store. "Luna had to run out, sir," she explained.
"I see. You and Miss Lovegood are going to be in my office right before dinner to explain these little jaunts to me." She shrugged and nodded. "Thank you, Miss Weasley. Now, shall we start on the usual charm, the one we've been trying for the last week?" he announced in frustration. Why couldn't these children get that one charm? He noticed Ginny concentrated and got it. "See," he said excitedly. "She managed it. The rest of you can as well!"
"The rest of us don't play with unicorns," one girl in the back said bitterly.
Flitwick stopped to consider that. It was one of those that the pure people had more success with. He looked at her. "That would make it more difficult, but not impossible," he announced. "Try it anyway. Ten points to whoever gets it correct today." He watched as the other virgins tried it, noticing how few there were. Much below the usual average. Especially among the Hufflepuffs. "Oh, dear," he muttered, going back to his stool.
"Sir?" one Hufflepuff girl, one of the few who had gotten it already, asked, raising her hand shyly. He smiled and nodded at her. "I have a question. Why would Mr. Weasley get very ill looking when he mentioned that he had seen someone create ass-less pants, as he called them?" she finished when he went pale.
"What?" he asked, not believing this one. "Why would he be upset by that?" She nodded. He looked at Ginny, who had suddenly burst out laughing. "She may be able to answer that better."
"Apparently my stupid older brother and his curse breaking team just ran into an artifact that showed alternate realities. I heard he and Harry saw one where he and Harry were shagging Malfoy and they were preggers, sir. So I'm guessing one of them did it and the was the thought of the sex."
"I see," he said again, looking at her. "Where might this artifact be at the moment?"
"From what Lovegood and I think? Professor Snape's office," she admitted. "He seems to have the same horrified and sickened look my brother had earlier when he went to cuddle his wife for comfort."
"Ah. Thank you. Carry on while I check on this artifact. Miss Weasley, if you would please accompany me?" She nodded, handing Dennis Creevy the bag of pranks and her school bag before following him out of the room. "Are you sure?"
"That's what Luna overheard someone telling the twins, Professor," she said gently. "Why?"
"Because if I'm right that mirror was one that was stolen many years ago from the Unmentionables Department." They tapped on Severus' office, then went to find him in his suite. He tapped and walked in when Holly opened it. "I need to see that mirror he was delivered. I believe I know what it is. If I'm right it was in the Unmentionables for a reason."
"He saw a reality where he was having Potter's love child and where he and Draco had just agreed to bear the next Dark Lords, which were their kids together."
"Ah, then it probably is," he agreed sadly. "If you could get us into his office?"
"I can do one better. Severus? Professor Flitwick and Ginny are here to save you having another exposure to that creepy thing." He came out of the bedroom in a dressing robe. "Get dressed so they can help you, love."
"Thank you," he said quietly, going to get dressed. He came out and led them up to his office.
"Yes, that's it," Flitwick said. He noticed the light spell. "You cast magic around it so I'm assuming you got a ...closer look at those realities, Severus?" He swallowed and nodded, turning faintly green again. "Ah. Don't worry, anything you learned will stay but it will seem as if a nightmare in a few months. For some reason this mirror always shows realms where men are pregnant." He covered it with a cloak he found in the corner. "Go back to Holly's side, Severus. I'll call the Ministry and Alex on this one." He nodded, and clearly fled the room before it could do it to him again.
Ginny looked at him. "Can I look? I've never even thought of blokes getting fat and round."
"Stay back from it. If you get pulled into it, you'll definitely be worse for the wear," he warned.
"Hey, it won't be in my body," she said with a grin. She stepped slowly closer, smiling as the picture activated and she was helping a man give birth. "Hmm, looks like a farming operation." She heard the squeak but she was squinting at the fuzzy picture and got sucked into the mirror herself.
Flitwick sighed and got back to calling the people. "Alex," he chastised when his head appeared. "That mirror makes you see horrible places. Ones where men are pregnant. It was stolen from the Ministry a few years back. You've given Severus horrible nightmares. Ginny's presently in it."
"Shit. Sorry, Finius. Should we come to get it? I can always put it in front of Fudge."
Flitwick let out a chuckle. "That would be fine. Give us a few to retrieve Ginny Weasley."
"I'm naked anyway," he noted, waving and disappearing.
Flitwick turned and found Ginny coming out of the mirror shaking and pale. "Are you all right?"
"Oh, yes," she said weakly, looking at him. "I just saw a wizard breeding realm. They had them in stalls like cows. I even got to supervise some of the breeding myself. I got to have Malfoy fucked by some gigantic bloke because it'd be the strongest match. Apparently all the young wizards had been given three years there by Fudge to help the world recover after the wars." She touched her stomach. "I and most of the other witches were pregnant. He had ordered it and had us all checked if we weren't." He shuddered. "Other than that, it was kinda neat," she finished with a weak grin. She turned back but it was a different one this time. "Gods, look at that. It's like half the school's pregnant," she said in awe. She stepped back through, going to help herself there help Ron be pregnant. From there she felt herself being pulled into another realm, and finally got to experience the feelings of real sex, even if she wasn't having it. She came out the next time wobbling and shaky, but grinning brightly. "So that's why Ron and Dawn go at it all the time," she sighed. She smiled at Malfoy. "I saw a realm where Fudge went insane and decided everyone had to have at least one child, including the men. The younger men were kept like cows in stalls at a breeding facility for three years."
Malfoy shuddered, clutching Alex's arm. "We must destroy this thing."
"The Unmentionables used it to keep their people in line," Alex told him. "We're bringing it to Fudge next," he said with a smirk at Ginny. "Liked it?"
"I just got to have sex with my pregnant self and my pregnant self's boyfriend, who was also pregnant but I couldn't tell who it was."
"Based on what I've heard about the thing it was probably one of your brothers," Flitwick noted happily. "Oh, Alex, Ron's upstairs in Hufflepuff. Perhaps you should gather him before someone comes in with a wand shooting restraints."
"No, restraints are Lovegood's thing," Draco told him. "Dawn's a romantic sort." He looked at Alex. "Let's get this thing out of here. Fudge's office you say?"
"Since he's still there, even after being demoted, yeah," Alex decided, taking one side of the mirror while Draco took the other. "Tell Sev I'm sorry. If I had known I would have put it in the main office for Dumbledore's amusement." They carried it out. "I'll call Greg to see if he wants to fill in for a few days if he wants."
"Thanks," Ginny called, waving at their backs. "Those two are just so much fun," she sighed, smiling at the professor. "Shouldn't we get back to class before the number of people who can do that charm drop significantly?"
"Yes, we probably should," he agreed, hurrying off with her in tow.
Alex Dumass dropped the mirror in Fudge's office, stunning his secretary. "Sorry, delivery. We just found this and we were ordered to hand it back to the Ministry but not which department so we figured he could figure that out well enough."
"It was taken during his tenure," Draco panted, leaning against Alex's side. "No more moving things today, Alex. I'm tired."
"Of course not, only ourselves home and to the bubble bath I promised," he soothed, leading Draco off with a grin for the secretary.
Little did they know that she had recognized it and that she hated her present boss. So when he came in, she waved a hand at it. "Sir, Alex Dumass just found this, said it had been taken sometime during your time as Minister. He said you should know who it needs to go to and that there's a strong magical field around it." She watched his pompous ass walk up to the front of the mirror and uncover it so he could read the words engraved on it. Then she nearly cackled as he cast the translating spell for the simple Latin. The mirror awakened and pulled him into it immediately. She hoped it went somewhere very bad for him. It seemed to but she hoped it was horrible. She called the Unmentionables and let them see the mirror. "Dumass found it," she reported. "Fudge is inside of it at the moment."
They rushed up, bringing the mirror down to their offices, with a stop in the main entry to let Fudge out. He came out shaking and crying and ran out of there like he was going to be tortured.
"It looks like he cast magic on the mirror itself instead of just near it," one of them said in awe. "Wonder if he found himself being tortured by the Dark Lord." They picked up the mirror to finish bringing it home. They had some people they wanted to use it on. And a few they wanted to warn, including Percy Weasley. He would be going into it if he didn't straighten things up quickly. They made their report to the Minister for Magic and then went back to their office so he could clean up the mess Dumass had left.
"Carnage indeed, more like chaos," the Minister said in awe. "How one man can cause so much damage I'm not sure." He contacted Flitwick, who was cited as the reporting body at the school. "We'll need reports from those who went into the mirror and those who only got a good look. Do you know how many that would be? I doubt we're going to find Fudge yet."
"Miss Weasley did, she reported Snape, Harry and Ron did as well," he offered. "She went to a few places. Severus said he went to a few as well, but Ron and Harry apparently only saw it."
"Very well. I thank you, Finius. If one of you see Fudge, herd him back this way. He ran out of here like he was on fire." He waved and cut the connection, sending people out to talk to those. Tonks got Harry since he was probably drinking. One of the females who was a bit softer went to talk to Ron since he was probably curled up with his girlfriend. The others were sent after the other people to get their statements. He looked forward to reading them. The mirror always showed such interesting places.