Date:Wed, 19 Dec 2007 12:35:48 -0000
Subject:[imaginings] More bunnies
I seem to be a bit obsesed with Harry Potter today ..huh.. I also seem to be a bit odd, but that's nothing new.
Bunny the third:
- When Noble Families were first founded their founders made sure the family could survive even if the main branch died out. Every Noble Family has a magical artifact capable of calling (teleporting?) everyone with so much as a drop of its creators blood. When all of them are assembled in one place the artifact scans them and selects the new Head of Family who possesses the highest measure of values the founder of the family wanted in his heirs. During the centuries this has grown more and more problematic. With
all the intermarrying, everyone in the magical world has at least a drop of blood from most (if not all) the families. With the squibs leaving the blood has spread to the muggle world and a simply shocking number of family founders forgot to make it necesary for a Family Head to have magic. The values promoted by the founder of the line weren't neccesarily the values of the last Head of the Family. If a family doesn't die out the Minister of Magic
cannot seize their property etc. Eventualy the Ministry has found a way of blocking the artifacts magic, but they still exist and as more and more of the Noble Families die out the block is starting to erode from the increase of presure. With the Black Family artifact added the blockade cannot hold and with that many Noble Families getting a new Head of Family and reactivating their seat in Wizengamot the magical world will never be the same.
Grissom: None of these laws are logical.
Taylor: I suggest we repel all of them and simply write the new ones that are logical.
Caine: I second the motion.
Fudge: Look now...
Xander: I vote against the idiot in silly bowler hat...I mean for Mr. Taylor.
Ethan Rayne: Well I'm normaly in favour of chaos and illogic but watching you explain logic to this lot should be fun. I vote for Taylor.
DiNozzo: I suggest we bring in Gibbs as an outside consultant for the Aurors. If he doesn't scare them into doing their job, they're no longer breathing.
Caine: I'll be checking into the death of the Diggory boy since no one has bothered to solve it yet.
Taylor: Mind if I come along? I have some concerns about the security at that school.
Notes: late year five for HP, right after the attack at the Ministry. Some information on from book seven but not a lot, just that horcruxes exist. CSI:Miami around season three or four, wherever he married and lost Marisol, but I diverge from cannon since Speed's still alive. CSI:NY during Lindsey's first year. She's still a bit cranky with everyone. Buffy, post Initiative, Glory happened but was minor, Tara never died. Supernatural, post car crash but John never died..
The Minister in charge of the stored artifacts room went rushing up to his boss's office. "Minister Fudge, sir, we've got a breaking charm."
"Why can't you fix it?" he demanded.
"Because it's the Noblise Oblise charm," he said, glaring at him. His boss went pale. "It's breaking right now, sir. I can't stop it. We're going to have a problem by midnight. It's a third broken right now."
"Get a curse breaker to fix it," he ordered.
"I tried. The goblins said that's not their job. They said it'd be better if it did break when I pushed. Then he hung up on me." He checked his watch. "We've only got an hour before it's gone. Do we have *anyone*?"
"What started the break?" he asked, standing up and following him down to the artifact room. In the very back of the room sat a table with eighteen staffs. All of them were starting to glow. All of them were looking very angry with their glow. "Don't we have any curse breakers that work for us?"
"No, sir. They all work for the goblins and we contract through them." He wrung his hands. "I don't know what happened."
"I do. The last head of the Black family died," he sneered. "Pity." He cast a curse at the wall and it shattered. Not what he had intended. He had meant to shore it back up. They flashed and the staffs disappeared. "Hell. Track them!" he shouted, pointing at the empty table.
The underling shrugged. "How?" Fudge's face started to turn purple. "Sir, I don't have a tracking charm already on them. The goblins do. You decided to save money by only subcontracting the curse breakers from the goblins four years ago." He stomped off, making sure his other precious babies were still there. He found one box empty. "Um, Minister? The charger's gone," he shouted. His boss stormed out. "It wasn't stolen either!" he shouted after him. He went to talk to the Unspeakable's department head. They could probably track them somehow. "Bad news," he said in greeting.
"More about the attack here last night?"
"No. The staffs in my artifact room are gone and so is the charger."
The head of the Unspeakables leaned back, staring at him. "What are these staffs for? Shouldn't this be something for aurors to deal with?"
He shook his head, sitting down across from him. "The staffs appoint the head of the various founding families." The other man moaned. "The ministry offered them a safe resting spot, away from family politicking, a few centuries back. Then they blocked them from being put into use. Fudge had a shield erected around them so they could not ever come into play again. Did the head of the Black family die last night?"
"Sirius Black did. Though there's something strange going on there," he admitted. "I'm not sure what and if I stick my nose into it I'm sure I'll have it bitten by the Minister."
The Artifact Minister nodded. "He wasn't pleased when they disappeared off the table either."
"I'm sure he's not," he said, looking a bit smug. "So they'll go to the head of the new family, no matter what?" That got a slow nod. "And if it's not the current one?"
"The staffs overrule mere lineage."
That got a slow nod. "What if they're muggles? Some of the founding families are pretty dark and have had...affairs with some muggles in the past. Willing and not."
The Artifact Minister shuddered. "That would destroy the Ministry."
The Unspeakable's Minister stood up. "Let's see if we can track them. Can anyone already do it?"
"The goblins and they refused to help. The one I tried to reason with said it'd be better if the shield did break."
That got an evil smirk. "In many ways I'm sure. Very interesting. Let's go look." He walked him back there, looking at the pristine shelves. "How much of this was voluntarily handed over?"
"Diplomatically forced for the most part but a few were confiscated. Why?"
"The new heads could probably claim them."
The Artifact Minister whimpered. "Not my babies!" he whined.
"We'll do what we can," he assured him, patting him on the back. The table had magical residue but he couldn't find all of them. "A few aren't in Britain. At least one headed toward the Americas." That got a horrified look. He shrugged. "It happens. Some of them went over after that pesky Independence fit they threw a few centuries back." He went to report to the Minister for Magic. "Fudge, it's worse than you're imagining. Some of them are overseas already. You might also alert the lawyers you're going to get challenged for anything else that's been held in storage for the heads of the families. Oh, and look at Malfoy tomorrow, see if he has it." He smirked. "Because his is in America too." He walked off, much happier now. Lucius Malfoy was a zit on the bum of the Ministry. He had much too much power around here for the wizarding world's good. Now all he needed was a snack so he could sit back and watch.
Because all across the world, people were suddenly grasping their new symbols of power and being brought back to the family's homes. Whether or not they were squibs or not. He sent a memo to his people to tell them to watch over the new ones. They'd need some help getting adjusted.
Horatio Caine looked up from his paperwork, finding something floating in front of him. "I have been doing too many hours," he told himself, going back to his current form. He could leave after this one. All he had were six more boxes to fill out. The hallucination hummed. He glared at it. "I know you're the stale coffee I had and the ham sandwich from the machine, but do be quiet," he hissed. It bopped him on the head, proving it was real. He grabbed it to keep it from hitting him again and felt...something from flowing through him. "What are you?" It hummed at him, sounding pleased. He looked at it. It was finely carved cherry wood. It had silver accents. It had writing in Latin glowing at him that wasn't engraved. It looked like it was floating just above the wood. He frowned, finding an online translator to type the phrase into. What came back did not amuse him. "To the victor goes the family and all the duties thereof?" he read. He looked at it. "I don't have that much of a family anymore," he told it. It flashed and he wasn't in his office anymore. He looked around the hall he found himself in. "I need to get that done," he told the staff. "Tonight. I also can't just take off. The victims need me."
The staff considered him then took him back to his office. It filled out the forms on the desk for him. Everything was done and it left a note sitting there citing family business as a reason for the absence, then it took him back to the hall. It waved itself and made Horatio follow along. All the lights were lit for the first time in ages. It was home. Finally it was home.
"Interesting," Horatio said, looking around. "Very interesting. Speed would love you." It hummed at him. "He's injured, staff. He can't come see this or you," he said quietly. It warmed in his hand. "Don't you dare. He deserves his rest." A ghost floated in and stared at him. "Who're you?"
"I should ask the same," she said, staring at him. Then at the staff. "It picked a new head. It's been a while since there was one of us."
Horatio found a chair and sat down, looking at her. "Ma'am, I have no idea what you're talking about. Would you please fill me in so I can make an informed decision?"
She snorted. "You haven't heard of head of families?"
"Only in the Mafia."
She blinked. "I've never heard of that family."
"It's an organization. They do bad things."
She stared at him. "This is obviously going to be a long discussion, young man. Do you have a name?"
"Horatio Caine. I live in Miami."
"Is that an Italian province?"
"It's in Florida. A major city in Florida." She looked confused. "In the United States of America?" he offered. This was seriously strange. Another ghost floated in, this one nearly a shadow without features. It whispered and joined with the other one.
She 'ah'd and smiled, nodding. "Then we do have much to discuss, Horatio. Welcome home."
"This is your family's home. It is yours by right. We'll have to see where you diverged from. The family scroll is in the library. Follow us." She floated that way and he followed, still looking skeptical. Not that he could doubt she wasn't real. She might be an effect of the stale coffee and the old ham sandwich from the machine at work though. She looked back at him. "I'm the sister of the last head of the family, Horatio. Not a byproduct of a spoiled bit of food." He gave her a horrified look. She smirked. "There is much to discuss before someone rude barges in for answers. The Ministry can be like that you know."
"If the Ministry is a government agency, I have dealt with similar people," he admitted.
She smirked. "Of course you have. The other one told me who you are." She found the scroll and floated it down, letting him unroll it for her. She found the current generation and pointed. "There you are," she said, staring at it. "Hmm, the male who founded your part of the family was not the most genteel or polite. He was a bit surly and nearly got expelled from the family for being a bastard to the rest of us." She traced it down. "Well, it is direct. The blood has clearly thinned."
"Why didn't the rest of them breed?"
She pointed at something. "There was a bad wizard then, Horatio. An evil one. He started a war for power."
He nodded. "We've had those in the past. Which World War was it, ma'am?"
She laughed. "Child, this was nearly the beginning of last century." She pointed. "This one was born in 1903. The war was nearly a generation before her. He wiped out any who could contest him." She looked at him. "There is much you should know. Including the duties of the head of the family. Even though there's not many left."
He looked then pointed. "You're missing one. My brother sired a daughter outside of his marriage."
"Men are want to do that," she sighed. "It is disgusting."
He looked at her. "He was high and so was she," he admitted. "It was because of the drugs."
"Another bad thing people do to themselves." He nodded that he agreed. "Do you stop them?"
"When I can. I speak for the victims."
She smiled. "Good. Then we'll get on."
He swallowed. "I still have to get back to Miami sometime. Someone has to run my lab and help others."
"Once you're fully integrated over here, it'll be easier to do that. Tell me, do you prefer apparating or portkey for long journeys?"
She sighed. "Do you have a wand?" He slowly shook his head. "No formal magical education?"
"I can't do magic."
"You can or it wouldn't have picked you," she corrected. She frowned. "We'll call Ollivander tomorrow. Perhaps he can figure out what would suit you easily." She pulled down a tattered book and handed it over. "This is a history of the family you belong to, Horatio." He took it and sat down at the desk to start reading. She went to check the rest of the house. There were no house elves, unfortunately, but they could find some she was sure. The house did need a good scrubbing. The tiles were dingy and you could barely see the family crest in the entry's floor.
Mac Taylor looked over when someone squeaked on his crime scene. "What happened?" he demanded, standing up and storming over. Three staffs were floating at the boundary. "Uh-huh. Prank?" he asked one of the officers.
"No, sir. They just...appeared," he said with a hand wave. "I have no idea where they came from. They're not hanging by anything, not being held up by anything."
Mac felt around them. No strings. No braces. He stared at them, tipping his head to read them. "To the family goes the victor and the duties. Wear it well," he read on one. "Interesting. Any idea?"
"No, sir. Just a slight flash when they appeared."
Mac reached for them but two of them backed off. One moved forward. He let it touch a finger and he felt a warmth run through him. "It's warm." He took it to hold. "Stella," he called. "Process that for me please? I've got to figure out if this is harmful or not." She nodded, getting back to work. He ran a hand over it again, feeling it feel *happy* somehow. "What are you?" he asked. "You're too light to be a weapon of some sort." It was pretty wood. Dark red with gold highlights. The other two flashed as two men walked over arguing. "Stop," he ordered. They stopped and stared at him then at the staffs. "I don't know. They just flashed when you got nearer."
Danny moved carefully closer, nodding finally. "They're not dangerous, Don." He touched one that was floating nearer to him. "What's up, staff?" It hummed at him. "Me?" he asked. It flashed. "If you want but I need time to arrange shit." It shrunk and went into his pocket. He looked at Mac. "Interesting story," he offered with a grin. "I'll let you know later. They're not dangerous. Where did you go to school, Mac?"
"I ... Columbia."
Danny stared at him then at the staff in his hands. "He's not one." It flashed, looking angry. "If you're sure." It flashed again. "Then let him know. We've got shit we gotta do tonight then we're yours. The other belongs to who?" It moved closer then he nodded. "Torn between two. Sure, we can do that. Stella?" She came walking over. "Touch this thing please?" She did and it flashed then it went to bother the other one, simply disappearing. He grinned. "Long story." It came back and nuzzled up to Stella. "You sure?" It flashed. "Okay. Let her know. I know she doesn't." He looked at Don. "It's going to get strange and difficult. You're gonna blow your stack in a few days while we're on vacation."
"Why are we going on vacation?" Don asked.
"Because I gotta go do stuff and so do they. You wanna come so you're outta the crossfire? I have the feeling we've got a situation going on that could use some muscle and common sense. Three of these appearing at the same time makes *no* sense."
"I want more information before I agree to leave time," Mac complained.
Danny grinned. "We'll tell you later. Let's get this one bagged and sent back to the office. Then we'll let Doc handle it, Mac." He went to help, patting the staff in his pocket. The other two shrunk down, Stella's hiding in her top since she didn't have pockets. Of course, she complained that the staff hid itself but oh well. He was not amused either. This was a really bad thing. A really, really bad thing. Three family staffs appearing at once with a war going on? No way this wasn't critical.
Xander Harris fell backward as the demon shoved him, picking back up his sword to stab it. It fell and he swung to get the one behind him, gutting it too. The sword stuck though and now he didn't have one. He grabbed a stick off the ground behind him to hit the other. "Buffy, lost the sword!" he shouted. "It stuck in the blood!" He shoved that one back at her, letting her kill it. Then he squeaked as the staff shot off in his hand. "Huh?" he asked, looking at the vaporized bodies. No more demons. No more minor apocalypse. He stared at it, reading the words on it. "Willow, did we send magical weapons?" he yelled.
"No," she yelled back from her position.
He wasn't going to take a mystical, demon killing weapon for granted when it suddenly appeared. He pointed the staff at her. "Do whatever you did to mine to hers please? All the harmful demons but Spike currently in the graveyard." It flashed in his hand. "No, I mean it," he ordered, shaking it some. It thought the order and it flashed more happily, doing it for him right before one of them gutted Buffy. He looked at the confused slayer and witches, waving the stick. "It did it. I picked it up off the ground. Anyone got a clue about the family values teeny staff?" It enlarged in his hand, letting him lean on it. "Gee, thanks. Needed that."
Willow came over to look at it. "That's very old magic but I can't tell anything about it." She tried to touch it and it burned her hand. "Hey!"
Xander shrugged. "Maybe it doesn't like you." He looked at it. "She won't hurt you or I'll bop her on the head with you." It still wouldn't let her touch it. Buffy it let touch it. "So we're not evil, right?"
Buffy shook her head. "Not in the least that I can tell." She looked around. "Giles!" she shouted. He came jogging over. "Xander got given a magical weapon that ate the demons." She looked around. "And the sword he got stuck in the body." It reappeared. "Thanks. We needed that back." She picked it up. It was perfectly clean, sharp, and had the handle fixed. "It even fixed the handle and sharpened it. Nice staff," she said, patting it on the top knob. "Even if you do look like a guy I knew once."
Giles gave her a dirty look, running a hand over the staff. "Are you sure you want that one?" It flashed and shrank in his hand. "Very well then. Xander, you're going to be doing some traveling."
"My passport's at home. So's my last uncashed check."
"It should give you enough time to get those. Show it to Anya, expect a fit. Take Tara with you. I'll have her meet you." He nodded, heading for home. "Ladies, he'll be fine. That's a very special calling symbol and it means a great deal to him, or it shall once he's there." He looked around then led them back to the shop. Their problem was done for the night it seemed. He did call Tara to go meet him so they could go together. Trusting Xander around magical beings was going to be hard but obviously it didn't want Willow with him for some reason.
Tony DiNozzo fired at the escaping felon, then felt something trip him. He took another shot and this one hit him in the leg, making him fall down screaming. He stood up and walked over there, looking at him. "Next time, don't run," he complained, hauling him up and back to his backup. He looked at what had tripped him. He had to, it was now floating at eye height. "Hey, boss?" he called. "Did this guy have a floating stick with rubies?"
"No, DiNozzo." He took the guy to check his cuffs then stick him in the car so McGee could bandage his leg while they examined that thing. That stick had tripped his agent. "What is that thing?"
"Don't know, boss. Not a clue." He looked it over. "It's pretty. Fairly old looking by the wear on the knob." He touched it with a finger, getting smacked by his boss on the head. "Hey!"
"You don't know if it's harmful."
"It's humming," he complained. "The only dangerous humming things I know are five- year-old-girls." He touched it and it warmed in his hand, seeming to push against his skin. "It's friendly." He disappeared, landing in a wooden building. "Huh." He looked around then up. "Not cute," he told the staff. It lit and he found a stairway. He walked up it, finding a building with people in it. He waved the staff. "This thing brought me from Alexandria, Virginia. Anyone know why?" he announced when they stared at him. They continued to stare. "Not speak English? I speak Italian if it helps."
One of them coughed. "No, we speak English," he said with a British accent. "Who're you?"
"Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, NCIS. Any idea what this stick is?" He waved it again. "Since you know something."
He just nodded. "There's someone here who can answer your question, sir. Let me get him." He went to call them from the back room. "Rudy!" He came jogging out. "You know that thing?"
He stared at the staff. "It's mythical," he complained.
"Apparently it's not," Tony said, letting him hold it. It flew off back to him. "Okay, I won't let others hold you," he complained, looking at it. "Don't expect me to pet you. Even if you are purring." He looked at Rudy. "Can I get some intel?"
"Sure. Boss, can I?" His boss nodded so he walked him off, taking him outside to talk to him. The family's seal hadn't been seen in nearly forever.
Harry Potter looked up as something flashed above him, reaching up to grab it. It flashed and he shrugged, getting up to go into the bathroom to look at it better. Magical things happening in a magical school, who would've thought. "What are you? You're not evil or we'd have Croonshanks in here." He looked it over, translating the words on it. "Ron!" he yelled. He came jogging in with Neville and their head of house wasn't far behind. He waved it at them. "Any idea why it woke me up and flashed at me or why it's humming now?"
"That's a family staff," Ron said, taking it cradle like he would an infant. "It means you're the head of your family, Harry."
"I'm the last one, I'd probably better be," Harry said, giving him a look and taking it back. "Anything else I should know?"
Minerva McGonagall cleared her throat. "It means your family is a founding family, Harry. One who founded our civilization as we know it. That means there's going to be people looking for you from the Ministry soon. Those have been lost for centuries as far as I know."
Ron nodded. "The Minister for Magic took them in a diplomatic move. He said there were too many assassinations for power in the higher families. Then he put them in a room and locked 'em in. So why are they free now?"
Harry glared at him. "Sirius died. Is this the Black one?"
"That's the Potter one," Ron said, pointing at something. "That's the mark next to your father's name on his trophy in the case, Harry."
McGonagall took it to look over, nodding. "That is indeed the Potter crest, boys." She smiled. "There could be one coming from the Black family. I'm not sure who it would go to. It is meant to show the new head of the family. It chooses them. Those families sit on a special board at the Ministry. Or they're supposed to."
"Malfoy does," Ron sneered. "Bastard."
Harry shrugged. "Not like I like him, Ron." He looked at the staff. "Any idea who has the Black family one?" It led him back to his room, letting him smile and pick it up. "A matched set or just visiting?" It hummed in his other hand then disappeared. It came back a minute later and snuggled in. "Well. Interesting." He looked at McGonagall. "I think we should wake some people up."
"I think we'll need some discretion," she countered.
"I was talking Ron's father, not the headmaster."
"He should know."
"He'll know at breakfast," Harry countered.
She considered it then nodded. "True." She led him down to her office and the floo so they could call. "Arthur Weasley." His head appeared. "Arthur, was there something about the family staffs getting out tonight?" she asked. He nodded slowly. "Two came to Harry."
"The Potter and...."
"Oh. Interesting. I didn't know he was a direct descendant."
"I think if we look, he might have named him an heir," she offered more gently, getting a small sniffle from Harry. "Are there any others loose?"
"All of them got loose. Fudge is in a snit," he informed her. "Already called us all for a dawn meeting."
She nodded. "Very well then. Let us know?"
"Of course, Minerva. Harry, do hide those," he ordered, staring him down. "They're very important and people will not like to see them, especially not in your hands."
"Like Lucius Malfoy?" he asked.
He smirked. "I have it on good authority his is not with him. It appeared somewhere else. Overseas." He smiled before leaving them alone.
Harry looked at them. "How do I hide them?" They shrank down. Sentient magical artifacts, even better to come to a school of magic. "Okay then." He put them into his robe's pocket. "What do I do with them?"
"Avoid the ministry for now," she ordered. He nodded at that. "Go back to sleep, Harry. I have no doubt tomorrow will be tiring." He nodded, heading back to bed. She went to look them up in the library. She knew at least one other might appear in the school.
Sam and Dean Winchester looked at the thing hovering in front of them. Dean splashed it with holy water again, then shrugged. "It's not possessed."
"Then why is it floating?" Sam demanded.
"Simple answer," a male voice said as he appeared with a blonde woman next to him. "It's magic of some sort. I know that one appeared to me earlier and ate some demons for us." They stared at him, one of them quirking up an eyebrow. "Hi, Xander Harris and this is Tara Maclay. She's a Wiccan who works with the same slayer I do."
Dean swore, then shook his hand. "Mr. Harris. Dean and Sam Winchester. We hunt the smaller demons."
Xander grinned. "Drop the Mister, Dean. I don't care. I'm not the dirtbag at home." That got a nod from both of them. "It's not harmful, or at least mine wasn't. Go ahead and grab it. Whichever it wants." They both touched it and it stuck with Sam. "Okay then. Pack. It wanted to pull me with it. Giles sent Tara with me because now and then I make magic go funky. He was nearly having a fit so I'm guessing it's important." They nodded, grabbing stuff. Including the car keys. He grinned and they disappeared with the car. He looked at Tara, taking her hand again and they disappeared too. As soon as they landed a lot of people were pointing pieces of wood at them. "Whoa," he ordered and they froze. "Huh. Sorry. Can you unfreeze them?" he asked the staff. It did that. "Thank you." He looked at them, waving the staff around. "I don't have a clue but it just ate some demons we were fighting on the hellmouth? Then it brought me to another one of it before here? Are they alien?"
One of the people slowly moved closer. "Put your wands on the floor."
Xander snorted. "I don't use a wand." He looked at Tara. "Do you have a wand?"
"On the altar at home." She looked at him. "I've heard of your kind," she said in a near whisper. The staff hadn't liked her stuttering and had stopped it as soon as she started. "We have no idea why it appeared to help Xander fight demons with our slayer."
The man shifted closer and looked at it. "It's a family staff. It marks the head of a magical founding family."
Xander looked at it. "You know magic goes funny around me, right?" It flashed and stayed, seeming to purr. "Okay then." He grinned. "How many of you are there?" It showed him. "That's fine then." Something landed in front of him and he picked it up, wincing when it went off in his hand. He handed it to Tara, who it went off more mildly for, while he waved his hand to get the feeling back. "Even better. No one's hurt, right?" The guy shook his head slowly. "Good." He grinned. "So what do I do with this thing?"
"Let me see which family it belongs to?" he said. Xander let him hold it. "It's the Malfoy staff," he announced. They all gaped at him. He looked at him before handing it back. "That's a very precious thing and there will be people who want it, sir."
"Harris. Xander Harris. From Sunnydale." A few people gasped. He gave them a delighted look. "You've heard about us helping Buffy?"
"I've heard of her and your town," she said, putting away her wand. "Sir, why come here?"
"It was driving," Xander said with a small shrug. "It felt like coming here. How would I know?"
"Good point," she decided. "Come up to the office, both of you. There's people in your family home. You can deal with them tomorrow but this way they know so they have time to toss a fit and be polite later on."
"That'll work," Xander said, taking Tara's hand while she floated the bags after them. "So, do they say good things about Buffy?"
"Mostly," she agreed. She could like this guy. He was nice enough, even if he was clueless. "You don't do magic?"
"Tara does. She does nature magic."
She shook her head. "We do ours with wands."
"Maybe that's the second flashy light," he offered.
She nodded. With that artifact? "Could be." She got them off on her floor and walked them into the office. "Boss?" The head auror came out of his office. "The Malfoy family staff just appeared in the lobby with these two. This is Xander Harris and Tara Maclay. She's a Wiccan sort. He helps the Slayer Buffy on the hellmouth."
He just blinked a few times. "Lucius is going to throw a fit," he told the young people.
"Do we know him?" Xander asked.
"Pureblood snob," the woman with them snorted. "Arsehole of the highest order. Pushes his blood and weight around all the time around here."
Xander smirked. "So this will do what to his power and pure blood?"
"Freak him out and make his power useless," she said with a mean smirk.
He smirked back. "We deal with Master vampires. He can't be any worse than Spike when he's been up for ten days and is jonsing for chocolate rice krispies for his blood."
Tonks burst out laughing. "Oh, that'll be one pretty confrontation," she decided. She looked at her boss. "Also, boss, that little brass monkey thing that charges wizards flashed on them."
"Get Ollivander here immediately. Make sure he's a wizard." She nodded, going to call him. He looked at Xander. "This way, kids." They walked into his office. "Let me explain what's going on." He set them down, sent for tea, and they talked. They could tell Lucius at breakfast.
Harry walked into the Great Hall, finding Draco throwing a fit. "What's his problem?" he asked Hermione.
"The family staff went outside him and his father," she said, looking confused. "I have no idea what they are."
"They pick the head of the family," Neville said. "The Prophet said all of them were lost at the Ministry last night."
"They went to find others," Harry said, staring him down. Neville opened his mouth so he shook his head. Neville nodded at that. He walked over to Malfoy, tapping him on the shoulder to get his attention. "How far did it go?"
"Why do you want to know, Potter?" he sneered.
"Because my family has one too, Malfoy."
Draco gaped, then backed away slowly. "No. There's no way." Harry pulled his out, waving it as it enlarged. The others gasped. Draco snatched it to look at then stared at him in horror. "This is the Black family one!"
Harry took it back. "Sirius was my godfather," he said quietly, making Draco sit down. "It showed up last night. We heard some went to America. If they're all on the same schedule are they here now?"
He swallowed. The Headmaster answered for him. "There's a meeting today, Harry. You have your family's?" Harry brought them up to show him. "Very well then. You are excused for a day to deal with this."
"I have no idea what I'm supposed to do with these."
"There will be people there to help you. I can go if you want." The staff turned him into a toad.
"I don't think it liked that idea," Harry said, glaring at the staff. "Turn him back! That's rude and I'm sure my mum would complain!" It turned him back. He shook his head. "It's sorry, sir." He looked at it. "Will someone there know?" It lit up. "Do we need to bring someone?" It flashed and pointed at two people. "Okay. Headmaster?"
"I can attend the meeting," he agreed. "Mr. Malfoy, it wanted you there as well."
"I should meet the one who took over for my father," he said coolly. "Let me pack my school bag for the day, sir."
"Let me eat first, Malfoy," Harry told him. "The thing woke me up at three." That got a nod from Snape. "Should I change into off-school clothes?"
"Those look better than anything else you own," he sneered. "Don't bother."
"Yes, Professor." He went to eat then pack his school bag for the day. Including some paper and pens. He met them in the entry and they were taken by the staff to a small room with a circular table and padded chairs. He looked at the people coming in the door. "Hello. Um.... I was told I could bring someone to explain some things to me since I wasn't raised in the wizarding world." The house elf that popped in made him smile. "Where can the people I brought sit?" It pulled out chairs for them. "Thank you." He sat down in the chair that matched his staff. It felt right. He looked at the professor. "Do you know what's going on?"
He nodded. "Listen for once and you shall find out."
"Thank you." He turned back around, looking at the one next to him. "Hello, Harry Potter," he said, holding out a hand.
"Xander Harris. This is Tara, she got sent with me in case magic started to go screwy around me again. Oh, you have two?" Harry nodded, letting him see them. "Wow." He held up his. "I have no idea why this came to me."
Draco snatched it to look at then gaped at him. "It went to a muggle!" he demanded. "My family's honor?"
Xander took it back. "It apparently liked me more. I take it you're a Malfoy?"
Draco swallowed and wiped his sneer. This one could kick him out of the family and take away his family's money. "Draco Malfoy, son of the former head until you were found."
"Xander Harris, from Sunnydale over in the US." The boy went paler. "Huh. You've heard of us," he said with a grin. "We help the slayer over there."
Draco sat down with a small whimper. "My father must be pitching a fit."
"Was he the blond with the gay hair who had his nose in the air until the staff turned him into a toad?"
"Mine did that to my headmaster," Harry told him.
"It seems to like that idea," Tara nearly whispered. Snape stared at her. She stared back then looked away.
"Leave her alone please. She's very gentle," Xander told him. Others came in. "Hi, guys. Do you guys have a clue?"
Horatio walked in and nodded. "I do have some. I found a very friendly ghost who helped by explaining things to me after my staff did some paperwork for me then brought me over here."
Mac looked at his. "Can you do that for mine?" Horatio smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "Good to see you again, Horatio. You met Danny and Stella, right?"
"I did. Good to see you both again." He shook their hands. Horatio took the seat that looked like his staff, looking around. "How many are we missing?"
"I know one because we popped in there first," Xander said. Sam was led in. "There he is. Harry has two." He did a visual count. "Looks like two others?"
The others sat down and looked around. An officious man in an ugly robe and hat walked in. "Are we not all here?" He looked. "We're missing two."
"I have two," Harry noted. "We're missing one, Minister Fudge." He glanced at Snape, who scowled. He shrugged and turned back around to look at him. "Which family is missing?"
"Centeres," Horatio said, looking at the back of the seat. A staff appeared and hung in mid-air. "No heirs?" he asked it. He was getting used to talking to inanimate objects. Mac gave him a funny look for it. "It seems they're at least partially sentient, Mac." It laid down in front of the seat. "Can you find anyone who might be?" It flashed dully then went pale and crumbled. "I guess it's without heirs."
"The last one died recently," Snape sighed, looking at the empty spot. Then at Harry. "I believe you were there."
"Cedric?" he whispered. Snape nodded. "Damn it."
"Indeed," Snape agreed.
"Can we get on with this?" one of the others in wizarding clothes demanded. "I do run a business."
"Shut up," Harry said. "We had one of them die last year." He shut up after staring at him. He looked at the Minister. "Now. I heard what these are for, but I'm sure others haven't. Can someone please explain the details of what should be going on to those of us who weren't born here or raised here? I know we didn't cover them in History of Magic."
The Minister spluttered. "Just because you're you doesn't mean...."
Xander threw a stake at him. "Shut up." Sam snickered. "God, I hate puss suckers like you. Go away!" he ordered. "Unless you have one? I'm sure someone less...political can tell us what's going on." He huffed. "Now." The man pulled his wand. Xander pulled his gun and shot his wand, splintering it. "Right the hell now." He fled the room. Xander put back his gun then looked at the other two who had come with Harry. "Do either of you have the name of someone who should be here?"
"I can tell you," Draco admitted calmly. This head of his house was very forceful and very dumb to show off like that.
"Nice shot," Horatio said.
Xander grinned. "Thanks." Horatio pulled his badge. "I hunt vampires on my hellmouth. Are you in California?" He slowly shook his head. "Then I don't care."
Tara bopped him on the arm. "Be polite. Giles would be appalled."
Xander gave her a look. "Yay. The staff was about to turn him into ashes." He looked at the blonde boy. "Go ahead, Draco. Please. I have no clue beyond what the auror told us last night."
Draco nodded, walking into the center of the table, looking at them. "The staffs you now hold pick the heads of their families. Families that have been around for centuries. Ones that founded the present wizarding civilization as we know it." He cleared his throat. "I do not know why it went beyond our borders."
"All the inbreeding," Snape said calmly. "You know very well there is a bit too much going on around here."
"I do," he agreed. He looked around again. "As the new heads of these families, you have the responsibility to any remaining family attached to yours to deal with them if they go dark and cause problems. You also have the right to bother things here in the Ministry." His father stomped in. "Father. This is Xander Harris, he fights with a slayer on the hellmouth. He holds our family's staff. He's asked for an explanation."
"The staff would not choose one who does not know."
Xander tossed it at him. "If it doesn't want you, it'll let you know I'm sure." The staff lit him on fire. Tara put him out with Snape following along a second later. "Any other questions?" He took it back, noticing it was undamaged. He looked at Draco. "Sorry. Not my choice to use fire."
"No, it will defend itself," Draco agreed calmly. "That is a sign of your power of office. Anyone who bothers you is to be taken care of either by the family, by the staff, or by you if you can manage it."
"They activated his magic last night," Tara told him.
He nodded slowly. "It's not unheard of. The creators of the staffs all said that the people who followed them were to uphold the ideals of the family. Not that they had to be magical."
"That's good because I'm not," Tony said dryly.
Draco swallowed. "Each family put into their staff what an ideal head of family should symbolize. The Founders Council is here to make sure that the Ministry doesn't get off track. It's a guiding force."
"Do we have congressional like duties?" Sam asked.
Draco looked at him. "Congressional?"
"Our country, for those of us who're american, is run by congress underneath our president. Like your Houses of Commons and Lords then the Prime Minister."
"We have a Ministry," Draco said slowly.
The other wizard looked at Sam. "Basically, we can negate some of the laws if we feel they're invalid for some reason. As I learned about your country, the answer you want is probably somewhere between your congress and Supreme Court. We are the final authority of law. If they are invalid, if they are upheld properly. We do occasionally hear an appeal from the lower courts if the person gets pushy but it's very rare."
Sam nodded at that. "Okay, that makes more sense. Are we always in session? I'm sure at least the one with the badge has a job he has to go to most of the time."
Draco smiled because that he could answer. "For the first six months, expect to be here. After that, the Council convenes once a month. The first six months are so you get used to the way it works, can talk to all the people who want to suck up, all that stuff. That way you can state your political leanings easier."
"We can take six months I guess," Sam admitted. "Guys?" he asked the clump of officers.
Tony shook his head. "My boss would scream and the director would never allow it."
"You do what?" Danny asked.
Tony grinned. "Special Agent Tony DiNozzo, NCIS. I work on Gibbs' team."
Mac chuckled. "I know Gibbs. I'll let him know, Tony."
"He'll expect to hear it from me. You're..."
"Taylor, this is Messer and Bonasera from my crime lab in New York. The redhead is Horatio Caine from Miami's felony lab."
"Nice to meet you guys. Must've missed you at conventions." He looked at the wizards. "Some of us won't be playing politics.... Draco wasn't it?" He nodded. "Can we skip that?"
"It'll still be asked even if they are going to annoy you," the other wizard said dryly. "They did to me. You find yourself favoring one side or another. Do watch out for Fudge. He's an imbecile." Harry snorted and nodded. "As he should know. Mr. Potter, how are you healing?"
"I wasn't that injured but I am grieving for my godfather," he admitted. "Does this mean we can look into matters like supposed death eaters being sent to jail without a trail?" Horatio and Draco both gave him horrified looks.
That wizard nodded. "It would."
"Good. Because I know very well my godfather wasn't given one. Or veritassium. For that matter, one of his supposed victims is still walking around. I ran into him last year and the year before."
"Not this again," Snape complained. "He was, Potter."
"Then Hermione should've been able to find a mention of the trial and she couldn't," Harry said, staring him down. "They found him collapsed, laughing in grief, and sent him that day. For that matter, I know very well Pettigrew is still alive! I'm still not insane! I'm still not lying and you know it too! So does everyone else after the attack the other night!" He stood up. "If you can prove he had a trial, bring it to me and I'll drop it." He stared his teacher down. "Unless you can, he didn't."
Mac coughed. "I'm sensing some undercurrents."
Danny cleared his throat. "Harry, how is the war going?" he asked calmly.
"They attacked here the other night to get a prophecy," Harry told him. He flopped back down. "A few students and I were here. It was a bad plan, I will admit that, but it was necessary."
"You did what he wanted," Draco snorted.
"How would I know?" he countered hotly. "No one tells me anything!"
"You didn't know about the prophecy?" Draco asked. Harry shook his head. "Everyone else did."
"I didn't know why Quirrel was giving me headaches in my first year either. All I got told was 'it's nothing, don't worry about the brain splitting, bleeding inducing headaches, Harry'. Including by your head of house. Including by the headmaster."
Draco just looked at his head of house. "He did?" Snape nodded. "No one's training him? Father expected him to be trained by now." Harry and Snape both shook their heads.
"He won't listen to me when I try," Snape told him.
"Why would I listen to someone who hates me for what my father did?" Harry demanded. He gave him a look. "Would you if you were me?"
"I would find the knowledge useful."
"I would too but attacking me does nothing to teach me, Professor Snape." Xander patted him on the arm. "This isn't the place for this." He looked at the other wizards. "What else do we do?"
"That's mostly it," Draco said, staring at him. "You really don't...." Harry shook his head. "How in the bloody hell does the old coot expect you to win for his side?"
Harry shrugged. "We've managed so far by getting around him and McGonagall, plus your head of house. Thank Hermione."
"I'm sure someone will," he muttered.
"Which would piss me off greatly," Harry assured him dryly. "And then I'd attack back."
Draco just nodded. "With what? A jelly legs curse?"
"I'm sure we could find something in the library."
Xander raised a hand slowly. "I'll gladly ask Spike if he knows what would help him. I'm thinking the nasty vampire with the morning 'tude could help. Yeah?" he asked Tara, who nodded.
"Vampires are real?" Stella asked. The other wizard gave him an odd look as well. "Can you prove it?"
Xander looked at his staff. "Can we get a vamp here?" One appeared, not one he knew. He looked around then vamped out and tried to eat Draco until Tara floated a stake over to get him. Then she swatted Xander. "Sorry. Meant for one of the harmless ones we know, people. He was probably closer to something."
"Used to work on the third floor," the other wizard said. "Where are you from again?"
Xander beamed. "Sunnydale. All my life."
"It's probably the magic going oddly around your staff," Sam told him.
"Could be," Xander said, looking at Tara, who shrugged. "We'll figure it out." Draco was still giving him a horrified look. He grinned back. "We do that nightly. Wanna come home with me to explain this to Buffy and Giles? I won't let Willow pester you."
"No, thank you. I don't think I need to run into more vampires," he decided, regaining his composure. The head of his house was powerful and slightly insane. His founders wanted strange things in their family. Though that might explain his father and his house elf torturing issue. He frowned then cleared it up. "Is there anything in front of the board presently?" he asked the wizard who had been here.
He shrugged. "Not really. Do we have anything beyond Mr. Potter's suggestion?"
"The death of the other member," Horatio said. "What happened?"
"Voldemort took us with a portkey and had him killed because we came together," Harry said. "He's the bad guy before you have to ask. Doing a pureblood stomp through the world to clean it out."
"We deal with that?" Stella asked Draco and the other wizard.
"You can make a resolution and have the ministry take it up," Draco offered, looking at the other one, who nodded him to sit down. He did that gratefully.
"We can bring a resolution saying that the Ministry will not fall to the Dark, no matter what, and we will not allow Death Eaters to work here so that they may not help their cause by destroying us from the inside." He pulled out a parchment and handed it around to her. "That's the one I drafted. Lucius did not like it. He was the ball of flame his new head of house made."
"Ah. The gay hair one," Sam said dryly. He looked at Draco. "Is he always such a flaming queen? Not that I have a problem with it or them but just wanted to know." Snape covered his smile with a cough.
Draco nodded. "He can be now and then. Then again we're one of the richest, more pure families in Britain these days."
Xander looked at him. "I'm sure that's why I was chosen?"
"I have no idea why you were chosen," he admitted, looking grim. "Do expect him to retaliate though."
"Sure, if he gets through Buffy, I'll kick his ass," Xander agreed. Fudge stormed in with aurors. "Oh, hey, the nice guy from last night. Did it get fixed?"
"It did, Mr. Harris. Thank you for asking. Malfoy, Snape, what are you doing here?"
"My staff said to bring them," Harry said. That just got a nod. "Both of them."
"Both of them," the head auror mouthed. "Which ones?"
"The Potter and the Black ones." He let him see.
"You can't hold the Black one, you're not an heir," Fudge sneered.
Snape coughed. "Unless Sirius named him his only true heir," he corrected in his usual near hiss. "That would get him past that qualification. Only the goblins can say that however."
"Being sentenced to prison would've removed him from the linage," Fudge sneered.
"Only if he had a trial," Draco said. That did hold up Potter's accusation. Fudge gasped and backed away from him. "Was there one? If so it should've picked someone else. My mum, my insane aunt, one of them."
Xander pulled out something. "The nice auror person handed me that, Draco. It's how they found me on the family tree."
He unrolled it to look at, tapping a dot. "No, it says under Sirius' entry that he's actually alive."
"He went through the veil after being stunned," Harry said quietly. "By your insane aunt. He's alive but unretrievable according to the sources Hermione found."
Draco looked at him then pointed at another dot. "Potter is listed on here. His entry says that he was made an heir and bled into upon his blessing to be made a true heir of the Black family." He let Harry see that. "That's how it was done."
Harry nodded, handing it back. "Why are they on the Malfoy one?"
"Inbreeding," Sam told him. "Like was said earlier."
Draco nodded. "Only so many good families to go around. You are?"
"Sam Winchester. I basically do what Xander does only my brother, father, and I do it around the country instead of in one spot."
"I'm basically a cop for the Navy and Marines," Tony said. "Horatio, Mac, Danny, and Stella are all officers who do forensics."
"I'm a student," Harry said. The others all looked at each other and groaned. This was going to be a problem. "Why didn't the staff want Dumbledore here?"
"I knew I should have him removed," Fudge muttered.
"Can we please kick him out?" Draco whispered to Snape.
Harry looked at him. "I do believe Mr. Malfoy's right. Do we really need Minister Fudge here for this?" he asked the experienced member. He shook his head. "Then can we agree to do this together so we get to know each other for now?"
"Those staffs are Ministry property and you stole them," Fudge announced.
Harry snorted. "How did I get here from Scotland in the middle of the night in my pajamas without my broom since your torturer still has it locked up, break into a part of the Ministry I didn't know existed, walk them out of here, and then make it home to wake up Ron Weasley and McGonagall at three this bloody morning?" he demanded. "You can verify the time if you want. About a half hour later, McGonagall woke up Arthur Weasley to ask him if he knew that they were out." Fudge stormed off. He muttered something under his breath. He looked at Draco. "Does your father like him for his begging or other skills? I've wanted to ask for a while now."
"His flattering nature," Draco said blandly, giving him a look. "He does what he wants without fail."
"Obviously." He looked at the aurors. "Do you need to speak to the board?"
"No, Mr. Potter. We do need to speak to you about the other night. We'd like a better account."
"We have. We need your statement now," the head auror said calmly.
"Can I tell Tonks? I trust her."
He nodded. "We can do that later in my office, young man. Come to us when you're done."
"I can do that. Thank you." They left and he locked the door with a charm. "Sorry, headache." He rubbed his head. "Not the scar," he said at the panicking looks. "Just a headache." He looked at the others. "Who's officially in charge of the board? The one who sets agendas and things?"
"Lucius," the experienced member said. "Which would mean Mr. Harris would inherit it I suppose."
"Don't want it," Xander announced. "You know what you're doing so can we lean on you for that?"
"I can see that," he agreed. "I will try not to be too political. I'm definitely not a Dark Lord supporter and I'll take veritassium to prove it."
Snape nodded. "If necessary I can procure and administer some."
"Does anyone disagree?" Mac asked. No one said anything. "Then we can consider it carried?" That got a mass nod. "All right then. We'll let you lead. Is there a term for elections?"
"We usually voted once a year. With the staffs being gone and so many people being wiped out with the last few Dark Lords, we've been down to a few of us," the new head of the Council admitted. That got a nod. "Since I've got a proposal open, can we vote on the statement I asked about earlier?" They all took it to read over. "Does anyone not like the wording?"
"It sounds like we're all very stiff," Sam told him.
Harry looked at him. "Most of the wizarding world lives on Victorian values," he told him. "Except in girls' school uniforms, which are pretty modern. Plus we have running water in the school and most houses."
"Then I don't have a problem," Sam agreed. "I refuse to support evil."
"Anyone against?" the chair asked.
"I didn't like the fourth sentence," Stella said. "It sounded awkward."
He looked it over. "How would you rather put it?" She pulled out a pen and drafted it, letting the others see it. He nodded. "That does sound better and more concrete." He smiled. "Anyone disagree?" No one said anything. "We're all for it then?" Everyone nodded. "Good, then it's passed and I'll pass it on later to the Prophet and those it should go to. What next? We'd usually have a formal schedule set up."
"What about the missing member's death?" Horatio asked. "Should we look into that since I'm sensing that no one did?"
"They all said I lied," Harry told him.
"Of course they did. It stripped their power," Danny said with a small grin. "As an American in the same world, we've heard some really bad crap about the Ministry and their policies. Should we look at those?"
"Yes," Snape said. "Please. There's contradictory ones, there's ancient ones that were never repealed. There's ones that will put any teacher in jail for educating any muggle born wizard and kill us for educating any female witch of any sort of birth." Draco looked at him. "It's still on the books, even if it's not upheld. Umbridge's inquisition board was acceptable under some very old rules."
Harry rubbed his arm. "I wouldn't oppose that but I know that the law book is very large thanks to Hermione looking in it. She didn't like the mandatory marriage clause for witches of a certain power level. She said she tested in that level and the law stated she'd have to marry a pureblood to hype the bloodlines."
Draco shuddered. "That's barbaric to make us marry a muggle born or mudblood," he complained.
"Please use nicer language," the chair of the board snapped. "Some of the board are muggle, Mr. Malfoy."
"Not my fault the staffs went nutters."
"Still, it is impolite," he said, staring him down. Draco nodded he wouldn't do it again. "Thank you." He looked at the others. "Are there any other suggestions? I would like to hear a report from the people looking for the Dark Lord about how it's going. I'm sure Mr. Potter would like that information too."
"I would," Harry agreed. "Because I don't think anyone is."
They all moaned. Xander patted him on the back. "If we have to, we'll track him down and shoot him, Harry." That got a smile and a nod. He looked around. "Are there any other suggestions?" No one said anything. "Good because that sounds like a lot of work to do right now."
That got a nod from Sam. "A lot of reading too. Are we gathering anywhere or do we hold meetings here? It doesn't seem that secure."
"It puts people in a panic if we're not in the open," the chair said. "That's why we meet here. We have held informal gatherings in the past. Most of you do have houses I would assume." Tony shook his head. "You do have one but it's fairly run down. You haven't had family living there since the bombings during the last world war."
"So I was told by Rudy. He also said the Ministry confiscated the family's funds?"
That got a slow nod from the Chair. "We will look into that first. Then we'll get the rest settled. That should take us a few days. Then you can meet with other members in case we need a proxy voter while you're at your normal employments?"
"That sounds reasonable," Mac agreed.
"Then we'll break for a long lunch, say until one? At that time we can get a goblin in here to explain those things to you all. During that time, you can go to Ollivander's to get fitted for wands, for those who need them. For those who don't we'll have an accurate count. It will be locked up and kept as confidential," the Chair assured them. "Mr. Potter can give his statement during that time as well." They all nodded. "Good."
"Any idea where the nearest cellphone tower is?" Tony asked.
"Believe it or not, there is one that carries into Diagon," the Chair said with a smile. "I've heard a muggle born student telling her mother that recently. That way you can reassure your director or whoever that you're all right." That got a nod from a lot of them. "Professor, Mr. Malfoy, can we trust your discretion and helpful natures to get them into Diagon, into Ollivander's, and then back here by one o'clock?"
Draco nodded. "You may. Is my head of house going?"
Xander pulled his wand. "I wanted to talk to him again anyway. He said he wasn't sure if he could shield mine against whatever makes magic go funky around me."
"Funky. That's a word I haven't heard in a few decades," Mac teased.
Xander smirked. "What goes around comes around, even fashions and words. Look at bellbottoms. They came back again and they're hugly ugly."
Horatio nodded. "That they were," he agreed. "I did have a question. How would those of us who are getting a wand educate ourselves in the usage?"
"You could take some private lessons," Draco told him. "Hire a tutor."
"One of the other schools may offer remedial tutoring as well," Snape offered. "I do know that Hogwarts does not. There are many former teachers who are unemployed however."
"Including one I know," Harry said quietly. Snape looked at him. "That would be a suitable job, right?" That got a nod but a heated look. "If they want to talk to him I'll bring him there." He looked at the Chair. "Are we broken up until lunch then?"
"Anyone disagree?" No one said anything. "Then let's do that while I call Gringotts." They filed out together, Snape leading the way while Draco talked to Xander with Tara guarding him at the rear of the pack. That was going to be an explosive confrontation. The Malfoys and Mr. Harris were nothing alike.
Tony walked into the local NCIS office, showing off his ID. "Gibbs and the Director wanted me to call on the comm. system," he told the local head agent. "I got taken by something so I could attend some important meetings."
"We can let you borrow ours," he said with an Irish accent, leading him that way. "Clear the room, we're calling DC." They all cleared after it was dialed. "Have a good shouting match, DiNozzo."
"Thanks. I'll try to keep the volume down." He put on the headset and stood there while Gibbs was gotten on his end, waving at the director. "Ma'am." He looked at Gibbs. "Yes, the glowing thing did it, boss," he said when he appeared. "I need to take some emergency family leave to handle things. Apparently it named me the head of my family and there's things like a government official who stole the family's money."
Gibbs gave him an odd look. "I want a better explanation, DiNozzo."
"I'd love to give you one, boss, but I was informed I could not let all the information I now have out into the open. Telling you is one thing. Telling everyone there and the director is another. I'm told I can have you brought over for a bit. I could actually probably use the backup since the first government official I met today was a slimy toad, nearly literally, and he tried to have me arrested for it showing up last night on its own. They had taken it into custody as well to keep it from doing its job."
"What are you talking about, DiNozzo?" the director complained. "You don't need to use code. We are on a secure line."
He gave her a look. "I'm not allowed to tell you everything, Director. There's lives in jeopardy. Including some of my family's and mine now that I know." She stepped back. He looked at Gibbs again. "I can tell you that I'm not the only person pulled into this. Four CSI are also here with me, pulled in by the same manner. I might have a list of names if you wanted to do a background for me," he asked hopefully, grinning some.
"That bad?" Gibbs asked calmly.
Tony stepped closer to the camera. "Gibbs, the slimy toad tried to have us arrested because we got called into this without knowing why. There's accusations of the same slimy toad putting people in prison without a trial, for life, because it was *assumed* they had done something. There's also a manhunt going on for a person trying to wipe out a lot of people and I'm in the way of that too. None of the others called, but there's former members who were causing another of us trouble too. It got bad enough that another of those called pulled a gun on someone earlier to make him go away."
Gibbs considered it. "That would count as a family emergency." The director stared at him. "His family called him for the emergency to help out. They're going to be killed. That's an emergency." He looked at DiNozzo again. "I want full disclosure, DiNozzo. Tonight."
"I'll try to have someone get you here, boss."
"I still need *him* here," the director sneered.
He stared at her. "We have officers here who aren't even trying to stop the person starting to commit genocide because their boss is the slimy official and he said so," he shot back. "I could use him more, Director." She stepped back at that. "There's possibly in the thousands of lives that could be saved if we can get this settled." He looked at Gibbs again. "Want to transfer to London, boss? I'm told I have a townhouse somewhere nearby if the government hasn't claimed it too."
"We'll see if you need that much help. You will call me from a secure landline tonight at nineteen hundred hours your time, DiNozzo. Am I clear?" Tony nodded. "If I like your problem you can have leave."
"Sure, boss. Thank you." He hung up and put up the equipment, walking out. "Thanks, guys." He headed back to the pub he had been told to go to earlier, putting his new charm bracelet against the discolored brick. The doorway opened and he walked in, finding his escort there. "Professor. I wanted to ask a question on the walk back to the meeting area. Is there a way to get my boss over here? I think he can help some things and he wanted full disclosure or else I was going to be fired. That way if they had to they could do the same thing they did to the redhead who showed up to bug Tara earlier."
He considered it. "It is a long portkey."
"He said he wanted to talk to me at seven, our time."
Snape nodded. "Easy enough to do by then. We can call someone over in the Ministry there and have them deliver it." That got a smile and a nod. "What do you know of Harris?"
"Not a thing but the boss and I do excellent background checks," he offered, holing the door open for him. That got a nod of thanks. "I don't deal with the strange stuff. Never heard of him, his town, Sam, any of it."
"It's one of those underground things. The closest I get is one girl who lives a goth lifestyle." Snape gave him an odd look. "You'd have to meet Abby. I can't describe it." That got another nod and they walked into the meeting area. "We're back." They all waved. "Are we set?" He looked. "Xander and Tara?"
"Tara needed to look at something in one of the shops," Danny told him with a grin.
"How's Gibbs taking it?" Mac asked.
"He said we're talking at nineteen hundred hours or else," Tony admitted. That got a knowing look. "Snape said he might be able to get him here so we can do this in person and they can do whatever thing they did to the redhead if they need to."
"He's stubborn," Mac warned Snape. "Extremely stubborn. I was a Marine too and I couldn't out-stubborn him."
"He eats other agents and makes them go away," Tony assured him. "Even the FBI leaves him alone."
"I need that skill," Horatio said dryly. Something small in a business suit, including vest, walked in, making him frown. "Is that a goblin?" Danny nodded.
Mac looked at him. "I've been meaning to ask you how long you've known about this stuff."
"I went ta school for it," he said with a grin. "We start at eleven, just like over here."
"So you're like Draco then?" Horatio clarified. Danny nodded. "All right. Can you teach those two what you know?"
"Some. I don't keep in great practice. There's not much need and I can't use it on the job." He looked at the goblin. "The last one of us will be late. The witch with him needed to help heal a plant in the herbologist's store."
"I can tell him later." He looked at Tony. "Let's start with you since you're the easiest."
"I was told the Ministry confiscated all the family money and the family home."
"Indeed. Illegally but they do make the rules."
"That'll be fixed," Mac told him. The goblin smirked at him. "Tony's an officer of the law, the same as the four of us are."
"Interesting." He opened a book. "This is the current challenge. It was refiled this morning. The judge said it could not be filed without a properly chosen head of the family. When it was pointed out why one couldn't be chosen he instructed the Ministry to let it go long enough for that. They have not complied and the judge had a brooming accident before they could be fined. It was refiled this morning. It will be heard next week. Our courts aren't that overcrowded on that side." Tony nodded. "Beyond that, the family has these three dwellings."
Tony leaned on the table to look. "Are they being lived in?" That got a nod. "Then I'll make a call to find suitable housing for myself while I'm here. How long should the hearing take?"
"A few hours. Our judges are not going to let it be drawn out. The judge that claimed the case is already very unpleased with the Ministry." That got a nod. "That is as it stands. Should they give it back, it should be with interest, which means you'd have this much after you pay the attorney."
Tony nodded slowly. "Can you access my accounts at home for me?" That got a simple nod. "Because I do have funds. Are there any suitable houses nearby? At least two bedrooms, furnished if possible."
"There are. We do keep a real estate listing as well, Mr. DiNozzo."
"Good." He wrote down something. "I'll be down there later tonight. After I talk to my boss. This is my accountant's name and number in DC. He has all my account information, including numbers and which bank it's in. Can you work with him?"
"Thank you." He handed it over. "I'll be there soon."
"I had planned for us to do this, then let you go arrange for those things tonight," the Chair offered. "You could go arrange that now and have the auror with you when you talked to your supervisor." Tony nodded, heading out to deal with that while another goblin came in to deal with the others. "Thank you for your patience."
"This is a very critical thing," the goblin assured him. He moved to Danny, looking at his staff, pulling out a thicker book. "This is your family's assets. They have not been claimed in a while."
"I noticed the house was pretty dusty. No other heirs?" The goblin shook his head. "Gotta work on that then." He went over it all.
Xander walked into the bank with Tara behind him, smiling at the goblin who rushed out to meet him when he spotted them. "I'm sorry I'm late for the other meeting."
"We needed to speak more privately anyway. Yours is the only family that still has a lot of active account activity, Mr. Harris." He led him into his office. "Did Master Malfoy come with you?"
"Draco went back to school." That got a nod. "So I'm told around the alleyway full of stores that's highly improbably by the laws of physics as I know them that Lucius is a supreme bad guy?"
The goblin looked at him. "What do you do beyond hunting demons?"
"I work construction."
He sighed. "Lucius is the Dark Lord's right hand," he said quietly. "He is also taking out the family's money at an alarming rate."
"Define alarming," Xander said.
"In the last three months he has removed a tenth of the family's assets." He pulled out the sheet that listed them all. "That is a basic summary of the last few months' activity."
Xander looked at it then sighed. "It looks like he's funding something huge."
"That could be. We have no definite proof."
Xander considered it then looked at him. "What about an allowance system?" The goblin looked stunned. "What's a fair amount for someone in their level to need to spend?"
"A hundred a month is more than reasonable," he told him, liking this one.
"Which would be the easiest way to do that? Change the locks on the vaults? Do a drop vault? Send it to them directly?"
"By a drop vault you mean a separate vault that they can only draw out the required funds from?" Xander nodded. "That would be more difficult. It would be easier to send it to them directly each month."
"Then let's do that and change the locks on the vaults. Will that cause a lot of expense?" The goblin shook his head. "How about auditing the household expenses?"
"Three galleons a month. You don't want to include the household expenses in that hundred?"
"I don't think that's fair. The household expenses - shelter, food, staff paychecks, utility payments, those things - can come out directly?"
"That's most reasonable and easily audited."
"Then let's do it that way. Put me on for fifty."
The goblin nodded. "That is most reasonable." He drafted the paperwork, letting him look it over. "There must be a penalty clause or else they would ignore it."
"They won't be able to get into the vaults and if they do, they're penniless and evicted from the family's estate," Xander said simply. That got a nod and it was fixed. He signed it. Tara signed it as a witness. The goblin signed it then went to send off official copies to the families. Along with their first months' allowance. The goblin came back. "Is there a family home that's safe from Lucius so Tara doesn't have to live in fear of them?"
"The local condo is quite nice." He gave him keys and directions. "We can make sure that the shields and spells will keep out anyone but you two. Even that redhead from earlier." That got a nod and a smile from Tara. "Then let us go do that. Let me get a curse breaker." He went to do that, leading them to the condo the family owned. It was spacious, had minimal furniture, smelled like it had been used as a brothel, but it would do for now and it was safer.
Tony looked up from his sandwich as Gibbs appeared, looking startled at the paper in his hand. "Hey, boss. How was the trip?"
"What was that?" Gibbs demanded.
"I'm told it's a portkey. That way we could talk in absolute privacy without the director trying to listen in." He ate another bite then pushed over the second plate. "Nibble if you want, boss. It'll turn your stomach."
"That bad?" Tony handed over a folder. "Start from the top."
"The staff thingy is a magical artifact that picks the head of the family. It picked me even though I have little or no magic." He leaned back, looking at his boss. "That's the current situation over here. Their hero and savior is fifteen, boss," he said quietly. "I feel sorry for the kid. They're not teaching him anything. The officials aren't doing anything. The Dark Lord is going around killing people without pure bloodlines. He came back from the dead to do this a second time. He was defeated before. The kid just found a prophecy stating it was him or the dead guy."
"Hold on," he said, holding up a hand. "Magic?" Tony nodded, pointing at the portkey. "Some agent came up and gave it to me, said it'd help me get to you. Where am I?"
Gibbs got up to look out the window, then stared at him. "How in the hell, DiNozzo?"
"Portkey, boss. The same as the staff did to me last night. I got you ham and swiss, no mayo." Gibbs came back to sit down and eat while he read over the information. "You'll be proud to know that there's four CSI, two demon hunters, and the kid on the board with me now. The Ministry had been keeping the staffs locked up so they couldn't name new family heads. That way no one could oppose them. It was going on for at least a generation but the latest guy is on a power rip."
"The grand canyon has nothing on this guy's need for power, boss." He shifted, glancing out the window then at him. "He told the kid that he had lied, that he hadn't been there when the bad guy was brought back to life, hadn't fought him, hadn't seen another student die from the same guy, and then let a grand high inquisitor into the school to torture him for supposedly lying."
Gibbs looked over the edge of the folder at him. "Would you stepping in solve it faster?"
"I think me stepping in will help a lot. I have Taylor on the board with me. Two of his CSI. Caine from Miami too." That got a smirk and a nod. "I still want to see you run over the aurors to make sure they're doing their job. The slimy guy in control is keeping them from it. They can't sneeze without his permission as it stands. Horatio's on a trip against him too. He had the last of his family locked up in an asylum because he was having visions."
"Apparently. The guy had one saying the bad guy would be back so he got put into a hole."
Gibbs finished reading, looking over at his senior agent. "Is this long term?"
"Once we get things set up, I can cut back to one meeting a month. It'll take some time to get it set up."
Gibbs considered it then nodded. "I can let you do that. How are they on technology?"
"Even worse than you are with technology." Tony gave him a look. "They use quills, boss."
"Yeah. Most homes don't have electric heat or lights. They do have running water. The school uses quills. The Ministry uses quills. They're very Victorian for the most part. But the girls at the school have to wear normal school uniforms, complete with short skirts."
Gibbs shook his head. "You're going to go nuts."
"Yup. Then again, this is still London, boss," he said with a grin. "I'm sure I can find a pretty girl or two to date."
"Probably." He ate a bite of his sandwich then looked at it then him. "Ham?"
"They said it was ham. Tasted like ham." He looked. "That's ham."
"It's maple ham."
Gibbs shook his head and ate it anyway. "The others?"
"Are settling in, meeting with their families, that stuff. I've got to go to court over mine."
Gibbs nodded. "Good luck."
"The Ministry wouldn't let the staff out to pick a new head even though the last judge said so; he had an accident before he could enforce it. Harris literally shot at the Minister earlier when he tried to squash things. Broke his wand."
"What does he do?"
"He's a demon hunter."
Gibbs shook his head at that. "Demon hunter?"
Tony nodded. "Did you know there was recently a government project to harness demons in combat?" Gibbs moaned. "Xander and his people took them down, boss. Can I get you to do a background for me? I can go check my email at a few places."
"I'll do that. List?" Tony handed one over with the portkey. "It's a fun ride but I'm not one for roller coasters."
"Sorry, boss, but it's a long plane ride and I can't do it any other way." Gibbs disappeared. Tony stretched out, thinking hard. This was a royal mess. Even the royal family couldn't get into a mess like this. Even cheerleaders in horror movies couldn't get into a mess like this.
Sam walked in and found two older women, an auror, and his brother in ropes. "Let my brother go." The auror banished the ropes. "Sorry, Dean." He smiled at the older ladies. "I was told we had two maiden great-aunts. I'm Sam, this is Dean if he didn't get a chance to introduce himself."
One of them sneered at him. "What gives you the right to barge in here?" He pulled out the staff and it enlarged. She backed up at that. "That was lost ages ago!"
"The Ministry had them," Sam said dryly. Both aunts and Dean stared at him. "Our father's still alive too. We were going to call him over for a vacation when things calmed down again. Would that be all right?"
"Which side are we related on?" Dean asked.
"Mom's." He grinned at him. "Mom was their niece."
"You're Mary's boys?" the other said. Sam and Dean both nodded. "Hmm. Fine." She looked at the auror. "Thank you, dear."
Sam stopped him from moving. "I want you to tell Dean everything we know about this Dark Lord bastard. We fight and hunt demons for a living," he said at the opening mouth. "We're both excellent at weapons, defense, and hunting. We might be able to help some if you let us know what's going on."
The auror looked at him. "I'd need permission, sir."
"That's fine, we'll come ask your boss tomorrow then. Let him know?" That got a nod and he left.
Dean frowned. "He went through the fireplace?"
"It's something called a floo. You can talk and travel through it," Sam said with a grin. "It sounds like a neat ride."
Dean just nodded, pinching himself. "Damn, must be suppressed or in a coma again," he muttered. Sam popped him one on the shoulder. "Hey! Bitch!"
"Oh, shut up, jerk. We're here, it's going to take a while, call Dad. Let him know we're at Mom's family house and we might be needing some backup. There's an asshole committing genocide against everyone, including a school full of kids."
Dean glared. "Presently?"
"Planning and gaining strength. Did the last time and someone brought him back from his last death."
"Think we can cancel the resurrection?"
"I got a full account from Harry about the ritual used, what ingredients, how he died the first time, though there's some debate there. I also bought two books that the bookstore said are factual about him." He handed over his backpack. "Don't touch the wand. We're seeing if you need one tomorrow." He looked at the aunts. "Tonight I thought we'd talk a bit. Since we had no idea you existed."
"Your mother didn't tell you?" the first aunt sneered.
"She died when I was six-months-old, kinda hard to," Sam shot back without heat. They both gasped, holding hands. "So we'd like to get to know the other side of the family. The goblin said there were only you two. Was he right?" He led them back to the kitchen. Dean would bring in what they'd need for research in awhile while he and the aunts cooked dinner.
Dean found their cellphone, looking at it. "Hey, a signal," he said, smiling at it. He dialed the number that went to their father's phone, ignoring the voicemail message. "Dad, Dean. Sammy and I are kinda in deep shit. We're with Mom's aunts in England or somewhere. Sammy just got named the head of the family. There's a resurrected bad guy who wants to kill kids and a lot of others who's going to be coming for us soon. Sammy's got a wand now too so apparently we're both going to be doing magic. I have a signal here at the house so call." He hung up and went into the kitchen to look over the rite that had been done. They'd seen it before so they knew how to counter it if they got close enough. "Who's this other note on?" he asked, pointing at it.
Sam looked then grinned. "The guy from last night added that. Rosenburg showed up. They erased her memory and sent her home but that was her suggestion."
"That book's protection rites, not offensive stuff," he complained.
"Someone's got to protect others," Sam pointed out. "Even if we do go hunt the bastard down." The phone rang. "That was quick." It could only be one person or a problem. A problem they'd pass on but their father they'd have to deal with.
Dean answered it. "Hey, Dad." He listened to his tense voice complain. "No, we haven't been drugged. We're in England somewhere with two of Mom's aunts. Sam's the new head of the family on that side. There's an undead ghoul who's been fully given his old body and powers back so he can go torture and kill others, including a school in the way."
"Their hero's a fifteen-year-old boy who has not a clue what he's doing because no one teaches him anything," Sam said next to the phone. "Hey, Dad. England's pretty, what I've seen of it. Even if the officials are slimy. I nearly helped Xander shoot one earlier."
Dean looked at him. "That's why I told you to go unarmed this time." His father complained about that. "Yeah, that's what we're in the middle of, Dad. It'll be a while before we get back there."
"They're thinking months," Sam agreed. He looked at the aunts. "If you wanted and it was okay, we could move to the house in the suburbs of London. That way Dean could drive around and I'd be closer for stuff. That way we didn't bore you or make you uncomfortable."
One patted his cheek. "Quit being so stupid, Samuel, and shut up. We're bored out here all by ourselves. We're also formidable witches in our own right. We'll be teaching you and Dean how to use your wands." She handed him the salt. "Add some please." He did that then tested it, nodding that it was good.
Dean smirked at his father's continued complaining. "Hey, we can always do it on our own, Dad. You know that. Us, Harris from Sunnydale and Buffy's crew. The hero kid. If not, let us know." He hung up and went back to reading. "He's down to whining. He'll call back tomorrow. I got the car off the front lawn earlier."
"No. She's solid." He held up something. "Tell me that doesn't say they killed another kid because he came too?"
"Can't do that. He was supposed to sit on the board with us," Sam said dryly. "Last of his family line. His parents supposedly had a home fire right after he died. Right after they filed a suit against the Ministry."
"Charming." He went back to reading, nodding some at what he saw. "If we can get close enough we can counter it."
"That's the current plan."
"Decent. We'll get with Harris and the others tomorrow to work on it."
"Want to help me go over the law book tonight?"
"Must I?" Dean complained, taking his bowl of soup to start dinner with. "Thank you, Aunt."
"You're welcome, Dean." She pinched him on the cheek and served the others. "Law books?"
"Did you know there was a law saying that any child who manifested after the age of eleven was to be put to death?" Sam asked. They both shook their heads. "That way they couldn't out the community. It was never repealed and has been used in the last hundred years; about eighty ago if I heard right. Of course it was restated in another law that was last enacted twenty years ago." Dean moaned, shaking his head. Sammy pulled out the law codes and put them on the table, showing that it was a thick, heavy book. "The legal system here. It says you can kill as long as it's in self defense, the person is wearing purple spots, and/or they have made you polka dotted. But if you do it without your wand, even to protect your own life, it's an automatic death penalty offense and it is to be considered premeditated murder because you didn't use your wand to try to get away with it. As written by the present Minister for Magic. The cops on the panel turned to the first page and nearly moaned in misery."
"Cops?" Dean asked.
"Four CSI, one federal agent, Harris, me, and the present hero and savior of the wizarding world, who is fifteen, plus a few older ones that had been there before. He's expected to kill the bad guy yet again even though no one's been giving him decent lessons in how to do that. He takes up two seats."
Dean looked at him, shaking his head slowly. "He's fifteen and fighting?"
"Few days back he had to lead a small group of students to defeat some Death Eaters breaking into the Ministry. He lost his godfather, hence his second seat," he said more quietly. "And today one of his more minor enemies learned that he's not getting extra lessons. He was horrified and pointed out that the bad guy would expect him to have them."
"But Harris is his new head of the family. His staff burned the enemy's father."
"Good to know."
"The kid needs help. Think we could get Dad to take him under his wing?"
Dean spluttered, choking on his soup. "You tell Dad, maybe he would."
Sammy grinned. "I called earlier."
"Oh, good." He ate another bite of his soup. "Any other good news?"
"The agent had to tell his boss. The aurors went to watch him, make sure they didn't have to erase his memories too. The cops and he want to step in. Xander wants to step in. I want us to step in. I think between us, we might have a good shot at getting the bastard dead in a permanent manner this time. Oh, and we really do need to see if Dad will step in. Harry has normal people relatives who like cupboards for his room."
"Like the things that hold cups?" one aunt asked.
"Like the thing under the stairs where you put old clothes," Sam told her. She shook her head. He nodded. "Harry was muttering about that being nearly as bad as the law code."
"No, his aunt and uncle might be muggle but they appreciate him and tell him all the time how great he is."
Sam burst out laughing. "No they don't. We've seen some kids who've been badly abused and he ranks right up there on the scale we've seen. Someone attacked Harry in the alley earlier and he ended up shirtless. He has more scars than we do combined from demon hunting our *whole* lives." Dean stared at him. "If not, can we adopt a fifteen-year-old boy?"
"If we have to stay for a while I don't see why he can't stay with us," Dean agreed. "Where's school?"
"Boarding school in Scotland."
Dean shrugged. "Then I don't mind if it's for breaks and things. The kid okay?"
"He ended up having to hex the person. His professor stared in horror as he did it. Malfoy giggled insanely when the guy fell due to a few lesser hexes. Probably stuff he learned as a younger student. Then Harry had to get some new clothes. The others were dissolved. The seamstress tutted and helped him get his student robe back into shape but otherwise he had to buy all new clothes. Ones that fit."
Dean nodded. "Yeah, we can manage that. Dad'll like having a new son. What did Harris say?"
"He leaned over to Harry earlier and offered to go find his relatives for him if he wanted. That way they would be leaving him alone. Threatened to have Rosenburg adopt him. She is a very bouncy, hyper, babbling witch. Tara's her girlfriend, not Xander's."
"Dad might like that then." He heard a thump outside. "That had better not be on my car," he said, getting up to look. He opened the door and stared at the man standing there. "You didn't touch the car, right, Dad?"
"No, I didn't touch the car," he muttered, walking inside. "How did I get here?" He handed Sam something. "I think that's yours."
Sammy looked at his staff. "Thanks for getting Dad for us, Staff." It shrank so he put it in his pocket. Where he thought it had been. "Hey, Dad. We're doing dinner. Want some soup? Have you met the aunts yet?"
John nodded politely. "Ma'ams. I did meet you at the wedding." He got his own bowl and sat down with them to eat. Dean passed over the information sheet. "From what source?"
"The kid they captured and bled. Who needs to be adopted," Sam told him. "He's fifteen."
John grunted in displeasure at that, going back to his reading. Then he put it down and finished his soup, looking at his sons. "How bad is it?"
"They're brave enough to break into the Ministry," Sam told him. "The same kid led some other students to fight them there. The adults joined in once they got there. Speaking of, the Ministry's security is still horrible, even after an attack. I got lost earlier by accident and ran into a room where they're testing stuff and another one where they were torturing someone. Literally. We're working on the law codes next." He patted the book.
John shook his head and sighed. "That's a full time job, Sammy."
"The staff picked me and if not the world can go to hell, Dad. Once we get things set up it'll be one meeting a month for a weekend."
"Fine." He picked up the information sheet. "The kid needs help."
"He's not getting it at home or at school. No one's giving him specialized information. Also, Harry has scars like you do, Dad." John dropped the papers to stare at him. "Like on your lower back."
"Dead. He's living with an aunt and uncle, plus a cousin I think he said."
One of the aunts nodded. "His aunt is his mother's sister and she's married to a very stout man, plus has a very fat son," she told them. "We're told they treat him like gold."
"Not if he's scarred like that," John told her. He looked at Sam. "He needs it that badly?"
"Yup. Harris offered to *talk* to his relatives for him."
"Harris is scary," Dean told him.
"He shot the Minister's wand earlier when he tried to have us all arrested," Sam said with an evil grin. "He's a very good shot. One of the cops protested until he came back with aurors."
John blinked. "Harris. Buffy's Harris?" They both nodded. "He's been chosen?"
"To head a family of supporters for the idiot in charge of the darkness."
Xander appeared. "Hey, I heard my name taken in vain and the staff decided I didn't need a sandwich after all." He pulled a chair over and sat down, smiling at Dean. "Hey, you look less tired."
"I spent half the day napping while tied up."
"Ah. That can do it. It works wonders with Spike too." He looked at the older guy. "Mr. Winchester."
"How do you know me?"
"Rupert described you. I told him I had met Sam and he thought I meant you because he wasn't listening while stocking things. He said hi by the way."
"Tell Ripper I said hi back. How's the girl?"
"Doing okay. She's having a girl thing tonight with Willow." He looked at Sam. "Turn to page 108. I couldn't get past some of the language so I chose at random." Sam opened it and stared, then burst out cackling. He nodded. "Yup. We are supposed to marry within the family to keep the family secure and pure. So, Dean, like your brother that much?"
"Not really." He took the book to read the section Sam pointed at, then closed it and carefully put it down. "Please remove that one."
"Oh, it'll be removed," Sam promised. He looked at his dad. "It is a law that I am to marry within the family to keep the bloodline pure."
"If you sleep with Dean I'd kick your ass," John promised.
"Thank you," Dean said. "Didn't need the bad sex, Dad." His aunts blushed and tittered. Sam punched him on the arm. "You're out of practice, Sammy."
"He can date my ex since I just broke up with her," Xander offered. "Anyanka's a go all night bunny who has a bunny phobia and a love of money."
Sam shook his head, then shuddered suddenly. "The one over vengeance?" Xander grinned and nodded. "You dated *that*?"
"She's temporarily human."
Sam shuddered again. "Eww!"
"Sorry." He grinned at the stunned looking father. "So anyway, Tara and I were talking about kidnaping Harry and making him see what normal people who don't want to use him are like since he's been fighting since he was eleven. Can I count on some kidnaping help, Sammy?"
"Sure. I think it'd do the kid good to stay with a good family for a long time."
"He has a friend he can stay with now and then but the Headmaster keeps sending him back to his relatives for some sort of blood bonded protection. He only gets to stay there for a few weeks a summer."
Sam nodded. "I've got a house. You've got a house. He's got a few houses probably." Xander nodded. "What did he say?"
"His headmaster said he didn't think Harry needed our sort of experience when I offered to let him stay with us for dinner tonight."
"So he's back at school?" John asked.
"No, I sicced Willow on him. He's probably eating the sandwich Tara was making me." They all smiled. "I hate people who let others abuse kids. There's no anti child abuse laws. Tara can do a search me spell through a book. She looked for me and there's not any."
"That'll change with four cops and an agent on the board," Sam assured him. Xander beamed and nodded. "We've got to rewrite that."
"Oh, yeah. Page 464. Bottom half of the page." Dean took it to look it up this time, then he stared at him in horror. Xander nodded. "I don't like them telling me that my witch can't get on top and do it for herself. Or that if she does, she's to be stoned but he can have the child implanted."
Sam took it to look at. "No, it's not fair to tell people what position they can get into." He kept reading and came to one. "Did you keep going?"
"Six pages over?" He smirked evilly. "I'm so wanting to let Tara have them for that one. Nature witches, like Tara and Willow, are not to be tolerated. Should we see them we're to stone them then burn them for acts of unnatural action, their wording, for being able to do magic without a wand. Any looting, pillaging, or raping is highly encouraged to make them change their ways and give up since they were here first."
Sam looked. "As written by Fudge two years ago," he announced.
"Which was when Willow helped save the world probably," Xander agreed. They shared an evil smirk. "I nearly let Willow have him earlier. I should have."
"That's mean," Dean complained. "Don't make her get her nails dirty."
"Pity," Xander said dryly. He looked over as an owl flew in. "We saw one of you earlier. It's the mail." He took the scroll it was carrying, letting it have a bite off Dean's plate. "Thank you, dear. Very good job." It hooted then left. Xander unrolled it since it was addressed to him. "Ah, here we go. Fudge has made it illegal for the Founders Council to meet."
"Fudge needs to go," Dean said. He took it to read, then handed it to Sammy. "It's now a death penalty offense to be one of you two."
Xander smirked. "Not for long it won't be." He and Sam shared a look. "We can make it to the room before they can get us. We can probably remove Fudge."
"If we can veto any law, then yes, we probably can," Sam agreed. He heard someone enter the living room. "We're back here." The head of the Council came back dusting himself off. "Dad, Dean, aunts, this is the Chair of the Council." He held it up.
"I've seen. I've already repealed it. I didn't think anyone would mind." Sam and Xander shook their heads. "I called the others on the floo and they didn't mind either. It's unanimous. As is the repeal of the one saying that they have to be British and fully trained at a school to serve. That's not his job to pick the heads of families."
Xander raised a hand. "Can we get Fudge gone?"
"We can but we have to be more subtle."
"I've learned some of that," he admitted. "I still prefer frontal attacks and sneering or quipping while I slay. He comes near me again and I'll give a demonstration. According to the book as long as I feel threatened and use my wand like a stake, I'm fine."
The Chair nodded. "That is what's written." He smiled, patting Sam on the back. "Headmaster Dumbledore...."
"Is in deep shit with us for putting the kid back with abusive relatives," Sam told him. "Harry is more than welcome to stay with us."
"Or me," Xander agreed. "Buffy's mom would love to watch over the boy once she meets him. She said she wanted a son."
The Chair shook his head slowly. "He wanted to invite you two to tour the school. He wanted to propose some changes."
Sam nodded. "That might help, yeah. We'd have to see and talk to the students and teachers. We can do that after we fix the travesty of a legal code and Fudge."
He nodded. "I can see that happening. Harry needs to be moved?"
"And taught what to do in a fight," Xander agreed. "I saw him earlier. He had no idea how to watch his own back. He did it automatically but he doesn't understand the concept like it was taught to him."
"Um," he said.
"That makes no sense," John told him.
"Some people shield instinctively. We learned at home," Xander told him. "Ducking and covering our asses while hiding doesn't help you in a battle with people behind you. He doesn't understand how to cover his backside properly because it was never taught to him, just the instinctive to keep from being hurt."
"The kid has no self defense training," Sam agreed. "I did see the fight and no, the kid has no training by anyone."
"He made that point earlier," the Chair agreed. "I would've thought Dumbledore was teaching him too. The boy's exploits are in the papers monthly."
"I think some of that was from my little minion in the making," Xander told him. "Not that I might not like Draco if he had a real life and a brain of his own. We'll have to see about that."
Sam smirked at him. "He's a little puss sucker."
"Well, yeah," Xander agreed. "But he's not thinking for himself either. Not yet anyway. Oh, I set them on an allowance. Lucius had kindly removed a tenth of the family's funds in the last three months. The goblin thought he might be sponsoring larger institutional bodies."
"He was funding the Dark Lord?" the Chair demanded. "He's an upstanding member of the Ministry, Xander. Do you know how absurd that sounds?" Xander handed over three pictures. "What're these?" He looked then went pale. "You caught him without a shirt on?"
"During his treatment. Willow's camera can see through illusion spells. From what I'm told he's a lieutenant to Voldemort. I will not put up with that. He will not be in the family for very long. You can be a snob. You can be an elitist snob. You can be such a snob you're a cheerleader. I will not put up with having a murdering bastard in the family. He's the sort who does it for fun. He reminds me a lot of Spike."
The Chair shuddered. "You can present this to have him arrested."
"That's a later step if I must," Xander assured him with a small grin. "For now, I'm going to monitor the rest of them. They're not going to be happy."
"Narcissa did file to have it taken away from you. Harry's as well."
"Yay us. According to page 35, the staffs have precedence. Even if the family doesn't like it." He looked at that rule then smiled. "If they don't like it they can leave the family. That's the way it's written."
That got a nod and he put the book back. "Indeed it is. So, bright and early at ten tomorrow?"
"Dude, I get up at six, have sex with my former girlfriend, who is a former demon and now is a nympho, then go work all day," Xander said dryly.
"We get up by eight," Dean told him. "Do morning PT then head off into the sunset."
"I get all the PT I need on the job," Xander said dryly. "It's great for the arm muscles."
The Chair chuckled. "I'm sure you two will bring a lot of life to the board, boys. I'll let you finish dinner." He headed back to his residence to let the others know that things were about to be shaken up a lot. No one liked Fudge. Even the new guys it seemed.
Xander looked at John. "Harry's coming in tomorrow. During the lunch break I'm going to go over battle plans with him." That got a nod. "Someone should suggest that he take some other training as well."
"I can do that," Sam agreed. "I need to bring Dean and Dad in anyway to see if they need wands."
"I'm too old for that stuff," John complained. "How's the security?"
Xander smirked. "Willow *walked* past them and found us. Wearing bright pink, like usual, and jeans. In a government building full of people in robes."
John just nodded. "After an attack. I'm not impressed."
"Me either. I was told it had been better but Fudge told them they wouldn't be coming back."
Sam snorted. "Why not?"
"Fudge isn't standing in his way. Whatever reason he's got for getting in the way of others trying to do decent things is helping the bad guys."
"Fudge is power hungry. He's trying to block those who are tarnishing his golden reputation for power," Sam told him.
"Willow can open and close the hellmouth. That's power. What he has is an illusion of power. It's not power unless you can end the world with it."
"He can have people put to death," Sam countered. "That is a lesser power."
Xander shook his head. "No, that's a nasty reputation and being a sociopath, or so I'm told." He grinned. "The spell didn't work before you ask."
"Even better," Dean agreed. "Any other cheerful news?"
Xander grinned at him, patting him on the back. "Your family has a lot of money and a house on the beach in France."
"That might not be so bad for vacations. How're the women?"
"They wear victorian clothes and don't believe in sex being healthy for you," Sam told him grimly. "No bars other than a few pubs. No strip joints. No clubs." Dean gave him a horrified look. "Except for the girls' school uniforms being more modern."
Dean looked at Xander. "Can you make them wear more slutty clothes?"
"I think we can make things progress a bit toward at least the twenties."
"That could be good," he agreed. Xander pulled something out of his pocket and handed it over. "Witch World Weekly." He looked at the fashions on the cover. It was proclaiming some woman was a tramp for showing her knees in a dress. Then it showed how to deal with the too short Hogwarts uniform skirt and still be a good girl. Dean stared at him. "Fix it?"
"We'll see." He patted him on the back then looked at his staff. "Hate to eat and run..." It made him disappear. He popped back. "It was good to meet you all. Sorry about that. Lacking manners." He disappeared again.
John looked at Sam. "He's as strange as Rupert said he was."
Sam grinned. "But he's a nice guy from what I can tell."
"I don't see how he was dating a former demon," one aunt said.
Sam shrugged. "Apparently it was good for him."
"If she's that hot in bed, it might've been," Dean agreed. "We'll have to ask or get him to brag." Both aunts shook their heads and went back to eating dinner. It was going to be along adjustment period getting to know the new family members.