Title: Paybacks are a Bitch.
Series: Mental Torture (Or the I'm Better at Mind Fucks Than You Are) Series
Email address: to list or firstname.lastname@example.org
Rating: a very tame G, for now.
Pairings: none, yet.
Fandom: Austin Powers.
Other website: Voracity.tripod.com
Disclaimers: Do you think I own them? If I did, do you think I'd be living without furniture and listening to my kitten go into heat? Of course I don't own them, and I doubt the SNL people would be that upset with this, but they get all the credit for the characters.
Summary: Scott gets back a little of his own, and proves a point to his father.
Paybacks Are a Bitch
Scott Evil put the last of the paperwork in place with a pat, smirking at the card that was sitting in front of his father's seat. He walked out of the meeting area, blowing a kiss to Frau as he walked past her. "Later," he called over his shoulder, heading for the outside of the compound. "Gotta go feed my creatures."
Frau shook her head, knowing that her son was up to something but not sure what. All she knew was that she really didn't want to be there when whatever it was came to light. She walked in and took her place, glancing at the papers in front of her. Then she choked.
Number Two walked in, patting her on the back. "Problems?" He sat in his seat, looking over the papers, smiling at Frau. "Well, it's going to prove a point," he said at last. Frau started to laugh, nodding. "Are you going to support him in this?"
"Of course. Are you?"
"Definitely. I think it's time his father was pushed out of his little cocoon."
"I'm not in one," Doctor Evil said as he walked into the room. "What's this?" he asked as he sat down, flipping open the card. "Oh, is it my birthday?"
"No, it's a surprise from your son," Number Two said, holding up his own copy of the paperwork. "I think you should read this."
"Why? He has nothing that interests me anymore." He pushed the papers aside. "Down to business. I want to rule the world. Why am I not able to do that?"
"Oh, like *wow*!" a female voice said from the hall. She walked into the meeting area, her long floral and pink dress floating around her ankles, her birkenstocks making a hollow sound on the floor. "Scott said this place was massive, but this is totally impressive." She sat down in one of the free chairs, pulling her long, blonde braid out from under her. "I'm Chastity."
"I'm sure you are, but why are you *here*?" Doctor Evil said calmly. "And what does my son have to do with this?"
"He gave me his stocks, man. Didn't you get the paperwork? He said he'd leave it for you." She put her smiley-face backpack on the table, unhitching it to pull out a wad of papers very similar to the others on the table. "See, he said he majorly needed a vacation so he advertised. I won, of course," she snorted, "and so for the next three years, I'm his proxy." She smiled at Frau. "Chastity LaGrain," she said, holding out a hand.
"Frau Frobishina," she said politely, shaking it. "Would you please tell us the whole story? Scott only gave us the paperwork and I'm afraid we're a bit behind on all this."
"Sure. I kinda expected this anyway. Scott's really nice but he was kinda vague. Anyway," she took a deep breath, "like I said, he advertised for someone to take over for him so he could take a vacation. I was top out of the twenty-five candidates so I got the job. He said all I had to do was to come and vote with his fifty-percent and he'd, like, tell me what to vote for him for." She smiled at Number Two. "I think you're the one he said would understand this the most. He said I'm here for the next three years. He even gave my parents and my kid a *massive* insurance policy because he said that big business like this could be *so* dangerous. I was thinkin' papercuts and the like but apparently he's tired of needing bodyguards."
"Hold it," Doctor Evil said, holding up a hand. "You're my son's proxy?" She nodded, smiling at him. "Where is that paperwork, Number Two?" It was pointed out to him so he flipped open the card, glaring at the simple words on the paper. "Oh, you are going to pay, son." He turned it around so Frau could see it.
//Dufuss, there's more ways to be bad than you know. Some of us just prefer a more...subtle approach. Ever loving, Scott.//
Frau bit her lip, trying to hold in the laughter. "He is correct in that, Herr Doctor. Scott's version of mental games are much more...refined at times." She glanced at the young woman at the end of the table. "How much of his voting power did you receive?"
"Fifty percent." She looked at Doctor Evil. "He said this was a family operation but you don't look a *thing* like him, man. Are you sure I'm in the right spot?"
Number Two nodded. "Yes, Chastity, you are. We're just a little thrown over all this. Scott forgot to mention to us that he was bringing in someone to vote for him."
"Oh, okay and all. I can come back later if you want. I was going to go meditate in the park after this meeting. I really need to clean my aura and all." She smiled at Frau. "Would you like to come with me?"
"No, thank you. I go to yoga for that now."
Chastity nodded. "I'd do that but I hurt myself dancing."
"Dancing?" Number Two asked.
"That's how I put myself through Valley Community College, I stripped. But I was in the top half of my business class and all my teachers said I had a natural instinct for the hard deals." She preened a little under the attention. "My daughter was so proud of me."
"You have a child?" Doctor Evil asked.
"Yup. She's kinda mine. It's actually my niece's but she's only twelve so I'm raising her. My mother wanted to damn her to Hell but I stepped in and saved her. She's *so* cute. Wanna see pictures?"
"Maybe later," Doctor Evil said weakly. "Ms...LaGrain, correct?" She nodded. "We need some time alone to discuss this. Could we schedule this meeting for later?"
She nodded. "Surely. Like I said, I have to go clean my aura. I have a major work to do tonight and I need to be mentally centered so I can access my power." She leaned closer to Frau. "My niece is dedicating herself tonight and then we're helping one of my coven get preggers."
Frau nodded. "A reasonable need. Do you have a number where we can reach you?"
"Well, I had a pager, but it broke. Scott said he'd get me a cellphone, but it's at home on the table because it's not activated yet. I could come back, say around two?"
Number Two nodded. "That would be perfect, Ms. LaGrain." He stood up, escorting her to the door. "We'll see you then, in here."
She nodded and waved. "Later and all that." She left them alone.
"My son's into torture," Doctor Evil said proudly. "I want to hug him." He looked at Number Two. "I want to have the details of this deal now."
Frau picked up her copy of the papers. "It seems, and I would leave this up to better interpretation, that she has Scott's proxy of fifty percent." She flipped a few pages. "If she dies, you're going to be libel for a payment of half a billion dollars to her family and her child, each, and his proxy goes back to him."
"He has fifty percent vote in Evil Enterprises?" Doctor Evil asked.
"Actually, he has fifty three percent. We've always wielded his proxy before so it was never an issue," Number Two explained. "It was part of the court judgement when they found out that you were gone."
"Riiiggghhtt," Doctor Evil said, shaking his head. "So we have to pay outrageously if we get rid of her, or we have to live with it?"
Number Two finished reading his copy of the paperwork. "It seems so, yes sir." He looked up. "I had no idea Scott could be this cruel."
"Nor I," Frau said with a smile. "What are we going to do?"
"Do we have the money?"
"No, sir, and if we attempt anything on her and it's proven, then we're still libel for the money."
"I see." Doctor Evil stood up, heading for the entrance to his private chambers. "I'm going to take something for my headache. Figure something out and give me suggestions, people."
Frau leaned back in her chair, nodding. "Scott's certainly come into his own now."
"Definitely. I don't think his father could fault him for not being evil enough anymore." Number Two put the papers back in order. "I almost like her. Her voice is a little grating, but I could live with her being around. She's sure to be more into the financial end than Doctor Evil is."
"I heard that," floated down from a speaker. "That is *not* an option. And where's my Advil?"
"In the medicine cabinet, Doctor Evil," Number Two called back. "It could be worse, trust me."
"That is also not an option." The speaker went dead with a high-pitched squeal.
Frau started to laugh again. "Oh, this will be *very* interesting."
End Part One of the Mental Torture (Or the I'm Better at Mind Fucks Than You Are Series)