Daddy Snape.

A house elf appeared in the middle of Snape's classroom, wringing her hands.  "Daddy Snape, must come.  Must come now!"

He looked at her.  There was only one reason this house elf would be anywhere near Hogwarts.  "What's happened?"

"Son is raging and throwing vases.  Please!" she begged.

"I'm coming."  He looked at his class.  "Stop everything, do not touch another thing."  He followed the house elf through the floo, heading to his home.  He walked into a barrage and had to duck a vase thrown at his head.  "Alex, would you mind not heaving your ancestors around?" he demanded.   He walked in and took the next urn from him and put it back down, looking at his son. "What's happened?"

"I'm pregnant!" he yelled.  "Against all the laws of man and the Gods, I'm fucking pregnant!"

He stared at him.  "Excuse me?" he asked finally.  "Would you repeat that?"

"I'm knocked up, up the duff, stuffed up?  Sounding familiar?  I'm sure you've had this talk at least ONCE in your life!"

"No, your mother sent me a letter as she was leaving the country," he admitted patiently.  "How did this happen?  Bring me some brandy!"  He looked at his son.  "None for you of course."

"Gee, what a shock," he said bitterly.  He sat down with the biggest, pouty sulk that had ever been seen in that house.  "What the hell am I going to do now?"

"That depends on how this came to be," he admitted, taking the snifter of brandy, nodding at the house elf to go.  "Retrieve Madam Pomfrey and bring her here.  Tell her it's highly important."  The elf nodded, going to do that.

Xander looked at his father.  "You still have the house elf watching me?"

"Of course."  He sat down and took a long drink.  "Watcher?"  It popped back in, looking attentive.  "How did my son get pregnant?"

"Misses Buffy and Misses Willow."  She looked down, one foot scraping the carpet.  "They was thinking that the Master Xander sir was not happy and might be leaving them."  Xander cleared his throat and she 'eeped' and started to disappear.

"Freeze," Xander ordered.  She froze, giving him a panicked look.  "What did they do, exactly?  Put it into a pensieve so we can watch."  She nodded, going to do that.  He glared at his father.  "So help me Mother Goddess I will kill them both if it was them."  The house elf and nurse appeared.  "Go help Watcher download her memories.  No one in or out of the house unless Father says so," he ordered.  The house elf nodded and disappeared.

Snape handed over his snifter of brandy.  "Somehow, my son is pregnant," he hissed.  She took the brandy and sniffed it, then handed it back and got to work.  "We'll have the memories soon.  I had a house elf watching over my son since his mother showed such poor taste to send him to America.  The elf thinks his female friends were looking to tie him to them."  She let out a wordless shriek and he held up the snifter again, letting her snatch it and gulp it.

"Think how I feel," Xander said bitterly, glaring at his father.  "I want proof.  Definitive proof.  Then I want to know what my options are."

She looked at him, shaking her head.  "You have all the standard ones open to you, young man.  You will have to decide soon.  It's been accelerated."

"Joy," he said blandly, scowling again.  "How far along am I?"

"Nearly four months.  You have maybe two days to make that choice."  He nodded at that.  "You're going roughly a day and a half each day. Fairly soon I'd have to start monitoring you more closely.  Are you a wizard?"  Xander shrugged.

"Yes," Snape said bitterly.  "He chose not to accept that onus and train himself."

"Not like they found me," he shot back. "I hate studying.  I'm a hunter, not a magic person."  He stood up.  "I'm going outside to think.  Let me know."

Snape looked at the nurse, then back at his son's back.  "Your opinion?"

"Could he handle it?"  Snape shrugged.  "You don't know your son?"

"Not that well.  We've made peace with his mother's actions but he does live on a hellmouth."  She moaned and searched the room.  "More brandy."  The house elf brought in the decanter, pouring another two fingers of it for her.  "Thank you.  Leave it, watch my son."  The elf nodded and disappeared.  "Should I plan on keeping him here or at the school?" he asked when she had finished her second glass.

"I'll need him at the school, Severus.  He's in very fragile health.  This could kill him."  He nodded once.  "We must make sure he doesn't leave.  How did he get here if he's not practicing magic?"

"I gave him an emergency portkey.  With what he does for a *hobby* I'm not going to let my only relative die of stupidity."

"What does he do?"

"He backs up a slayer," he said blandly, his hands clenched on the arms of his reading chair.  She glared at him.  "Again, his mother put him there," he noted.  "She went to a muggle and stayed with him.  Unfortunately I didn't learn of him until he was eight.  By then she had poisoned herself with her lifestyle and had poisoned him against me."  He looked over as the house elf tapped on the door before stepping inside.  "What?"

"Headmaster is wondering what is going on.  Headmaster is saying he needs nurse and teacher back to do their jobs now."

"Tell Albus my son is home.  He can wait," he ordered cooly.  "Where is my son?"

"Watcher and Homey is enforcing a shield," she said firmly.  "Not let son leave."  She curtsied then left.


"He must not go home.  The energy is, will, warp that child to darkness.  Even if it's not a wizard or witch born."

"Too soon to tell?"  She nodded.  "Then what would you suggest?"

"The school is the safest place and we could make sure he couldn't leave until the situation was resolved.  It would also allow us to unwarp his natural energy and that of the child if he decides to have it.   If not, it would be easiest done there with medical support nearby."  She looked over as the young man stomped back in.  "We've been talking about your options, young man."

"Xander, please."

"Xander then," she agreed, giving him a pat on the hand.  "We were thinking it would be better if you were to come to the school with us.  That way you could have the support you need either way you went and we could work on weaning the dark energy from you.  If not, you could be in greater danger."

"Yeah, well, I called home and they're needing me to come home.  A damn emergency."  He looked at his father.  "I have to go.  Can you reset the portkey?"

"No.  We can send them help."

"I doubt she'd accept it.  We're still working with Willow's magic issues."

"I can have someone sent who can help them.  What sort of issue?"

"Major insurgence of vampires."  He shrugged.  "The usual."

"You're not going," Snape said quietly.  "I'll have the headmaster send someone or go myself."  He stood up.  "Poppy, call and inform him of this."

"I'm not going to be tested on," Xander said firmly.  "I refuse to be a lab rat."

"I'd take notes and only do tests that would tell me that you're healthy," she assured him.  "I have no intention of doing medical tests that could harm either of you," she promised.  "No one does that in my infirmary."

"Yeah, but you've got a boss. What's his viewpoint?"

"An interesting point," Snape agreed.  "Poppy, is there any way to keep this quiet?"

"No.  Not really.  I'd have to order some supplements and things."  She looked at the young man.  "It is up to you, but you will need medical support no matter which way you decide.  Your natural energy is so warped it's making you ill.  If you keep him or her, you'll both have to have that treatment so you're both healthy."  She looked at Snape, then at the young man again.  "If you wold stay here, we can do it easily enough.  We'll have to get some help for you, but there are some students who can sub in.  We can do whatever we need to do to help you via them."  Xander sat down, frowning slightly.  "If you do decide not to go through with this I would have to do that myself."  He nodded at that.  "Either way you still need to have yourself cleaned of the bad energy that surrounds you."

"Not that it surprises me," Xander said dryly.  "Do we know yet what they did?"

"I was going to take her to look it over.  Let us do that, then we'll be able to give you more about your options.  For now, rest and have a drink."

"Yes, father."

"Thank you."  He stood up and led her to his study, letting her pick her spot to watch the memories from.  He heard the floo go off and looked.  "Not now."

"Is there an emergency?"

"Yes.  My son is rather ill and came for help.  Also, they need help back in his former home.  Please send someone."  He hung up on him and got back to it.  When they had returned from the memories, he looked at her.  He kept himself calm.  "I don't want him at the school."

"Me either," she agreed quietly.  She licked her lips, then looked at the pensieve.  "He still has the choices.  What would you have us do?"

"It is his body."

"True."  She went to get the boy, bringing him back.  "Do you know how to use one of these?"  He nodded, bending over and touching the memories to watch.  He came out and turned, throwing it at the wall.  "You may not go back.  It will kill you," she said quietly.

"Reparo," Snape hissed, flicking his wand at it.  "Retende."  It all came back together, including the memories.  "I'm going to lock this up," he said, standing up.  "I can send someone to save their lives if you wish."

Xander looked at him. "I have no idea what I want," he admitted, walking out, going to throw a fit in the gardens.  Just in case his magic leaked and he blew something up again.

Snape looked at the nurse.  "What do you want to do?" he asked quietly, staying calm.  He had to remember to stay calm.  His other master would feel it if he got too upset.  He looked toward the gardens at the loud explosion. "We'll fix that later."

"It could be wearing out some of that bad energy," she offered gently.  She stood up.  "I'll gather the students who I'll need.  I know you'll want only those of yours you can trust."

"I trust no one in that school," he reminded her.  "Especially not those in my own house."

"Who do you want?"

"I'm not sure yet."  He stood up.  "We should check on him then head back to the school to talk to some people.  You'll know the skills that would be most helpful."

"We'll need someone with a good deal of healing training plus some potions and herbology skills," she offered quietly. "We'll do whatever he wants."

"Good."  He walked her out to the back garden, letting her look at the circle of destruction and his son sitting in the center of it scowling.  "Feel better?"

"No."  He looked at him.  "Sorry."

"It has been known to happen," he pointed out.  "Were this me, I'd be throwing fits as well."  He walked out and helped him to his feet.  "We've got to return to the school to gather some students to help you, Alex," he said quietly.  "It'll be safer for you if certain interfering sorts don't know you're here.  I can note it as a special project you brought me.  Have you made a decision?"

"I...I'm not sure," he admitted, looking at him like his world was falling apart.  "I have no idea.  Oh, I called my ex.  She's told me I must have been cheating on her."

Snape drew a symbol in the air, then hissed his former almost daughter-in-law's name.  "Anyanka."  She appeared, glaring at him, then hissed at Xander.  "Do not.  It was the witch's fault.  As you can tell if you cared to look."

"So!  Who's the other parent!"

"Gee, I don't know.  Ask the bitches," he shot back, glaring his girl.  "Not like I wanted this!  I only found out today!"  She huffed and glared more.  "Oh, grow the fuck up!  They did this to me, not the other way around!  I did not ask for this!" he screamed.  He started to move but the nurse pulled him off to the side, checking him over.  "I'm fine."

"You're not.  It's normal to be emotional and upset," she said gently, making him sit on a swing.  "Yelling at her is probably cathartic but not good for either of you."

"He shouldn't have it," Anya sneered.

"I've had enough," Snape noted.  "Obliviate."  She went slack jawed and he banished her back to the demon realms.  He felt himself be called by his other master and hissed, grabbing his arm.  "Poppy."

"The shields will hold," she assured him.  He nodded and left.  She looked at him.  "We must take you back inside."  He nodded, letting her lead him to a safer location.  "Now, let us talk about your choices," she said gently.

"Sure.  I've got to make a call first."  He called a long loved number.  "Joyce, Xander.  Would you please turn to the blonde brat you gave birth to and slap the hell out of her for helping Willow with a spell to tie me to them by making me pregnant."  He weathered the laughter.  "Not.  Kidding," he ground out.  She quit laughing.  "I'm with my real father.  She and Willow enacted a spell.  I'm going to kill them both.  I'm very sorry for your loss in advance."  He growled at her soothing words.  "Joyce, don't.  Right now, I'm so pissed I'm leaking accidental magic. I blew up my father's back garden.  I don't care.  I'm not going to be home for a very long time.  Please pack my stuff and I'll have it brought over.  No, I told Anya, she decided I had cheated on her somehow.  When I pointed out it was done by a spell her response was 'so'.   We sent her off before I went off on her again.  Because I've had enough," he said quietly.

"I'm may not be coming back.  I have no idea yet.  Right now, if I saw either of them, they'd be dead.  I would gladly kill them both with my bare hands and my very dull pocket knife.  Please pass that on and tell Giles and tell them to never touch me magically again.  I'm going to be warded against it.  If they try, I'm going to sic my father on them.  My father is homicidal at the best of times, about this he's already figuring out how to kill them from a distance.  So tell them to leave me alone and I'll deal with them when I'm more rational."  He hung up and took a deep breath.  Then he looked at her again.  "I think I need a nap.  I'm rather tired.  Can I do that?"

"You can, I highly encourage that."  He nodded, going upstairs.  She used the floo to call the school.  "Headmaster."

"What is going on?"

"Severus' son came home a bit...injured.  He's having a terrible time of it and his magic has been tainted by the hellmouth he's been raised on.  Unfortunately Severus just got summoned."  His face tightened.  "I need to stay with the boy until he can come back, then we're going to assign a few students to the task of removing his overabundance of energy.  I'll be checking on him routinely during the process since it won't be a few moment's work.  He and I have already talked about the students we want to help us.  I'll be bringing a list back with me when I come.  When they get here and we brief them on their project, we'll both return and come to check on him very often."

"How was he injured?"

"Spell related.  They had one of those wandless people over there and she hexed him so he absorbed a lot of excess energy from the town he was living in.  It's making him a bit out of control at the moment."  She stood up.  "I should check on him.  He blew up the garden without meaning to.  We'll be back by tonight."  She turned off the connection and went to hold the poor boy she could hear crying. "You poor thing," she offered, curling up behind his back to hold him.  "Shh, you let it out, Xander.  It's a good thing to let it out."  He nodded, sniffling.  "Your father will be fine," she promised.  "He'll be back soon."   He nodded and turned over to cuddle her.


Snape landed back in the house, looking at his son.  "Somehow he knows."

"Then he's probably watching over Willow's shoulder," Xander said practically, yawning.  He was still tired.  Whatever the nurse had done to him when he had nightmares was still keeping him calm.  "If I was dark, I'd watch her for competition too."

"Point."  He sat down, looking at him.  "I told him you're in the process of having it terminated.  He said it was a pity and he wanted to know how it was done.  As long as no news gets back to him, you'll be fine."  Xander nodded at that.  "Have you made a decision?"

"I don't know," he admitted weakly.  "This isn't something I have an opinion about. Before I was always 'whatever the mother wants, it's her body' but when it's mine I'm not sure."

"We'll need to know soon," Madam Pomfrey said gently.  He nodded, looking at her.  "I can tell you that I can't find a reason *medically* for you to terminate it."

"Boy, girl?" Xander asked.

"Girl I think.  A bit too soon to tell really."

Xander sighed, looking down, then at his father.  "Should you continue with this pregnancy, the child would be raised as family," he ordered calmly. "She will be a Snape.  She will go to whatever school I'm at when she's ready.  You will allow us to tutor you as well, just to protect her and to defeat any magic she may show."  Xander considered it then nodded slowly.  "You may stay here with her for as long as you wish."  Xander nodded again.  "If you go back there, I will hex those women and make them dread remembering you."

Xander gave him a weak smile.  "I don't think I could take Sunnydale anyway.  You're sure?  I know I'm a bothersome little twit."

"I only called you that because you helped blow up the cauldron, son.  As long as you stay out of my work area, it should be fine."  He nodded.  "Whichever you want, Xander."

"Then I think I want her.  We could use a new Snape around here.  Someone's got to carry on the family name."  His father snorted at that.  "Not like I'm doing it."  He looked at the nurse.  "What do I need to do?"

"For right now, I want you to rest.  We'll be working on unraveling the bad energy around both of you tomorrow, once you're more rested."  Xander nodded at that, curling up in the chair. "In bed, Alexander."


"Fine, Xander then."  She smiled at him.  "Severus, I've drawn up a list.  The only problem is that I can foresee needing a potions person on site in case something happens and to maintain the cover you set up.  Do you trust Granger that much?  She is very good at healing spells."

"Must I have females around me?" Xander asked. "I'm really not fond of their species at the moment."

"The only other option would be Draco Malfoy," she told him.  "He's a bit...problematic."

"His father is third highest idiot in the death eaters," Snape said dryly.  "I'm not sure where his loyalties lie."

"If we could promise him something better than reporting it?" Xander offered.  "After all, I live on a hellmouth.  If he's like that he probably wants power.  If he's more neutral he'll want knowledge.  Either way he wins if you present it right."

"I'll try, my son.  I shall try."  He stood up.  "Anyone else, Poppy?"  She handed over the list.  "Longbottom?"

"He can gather back at the school," she promised. "Unfortunately Weasley is the best at shields in the school.  I know you don't like him."

"Will I get along with him okay?" Xander asked patiently.

"Quite possibly," Snape admitted.  "He's rather a lot like you now and then."  Xander scowled at him.  "I don't loathe him for that reason, Xander.  I loathe him for a great many others."

"Are we sure I have to stay here?"

"Yes," Snape said firmly.  "Unless something truly horrid happens, you are staying here."  Xander nodded, still grimacing at him.  "I loathe him because he cuts up in class, he's an imbecile of the highest manner, he's opinionated without having a clue what his opinion means, and he's violent, son."

"Sounds like most teenage males to me," he quipped.

"Not all of us."

"No, but no one can really call you normal, dad."

"Which is another reason why I do not like him."

"Dad, your ego's showing," Xander assured him.  He looked at the nurse.  "Do we have a backup site if something happens?"

"Not yet but I'm sure we can figure one out," she promised.  He nodded at that.  "For now you should eat something and go rest, dear."  He got up with a moan, heading to the kitchens.  She looked at her fellow staff member.  "He is correct, we should set up a backup point."

"I'll have one readied."  She nodded at that.  "We're going to the school, Xander.  Settle in and sleep tonight.  We'll introduce your helpers in the morning."

"That's fine, thank you."

They went through the floo while Xander sat down to have ice cream for dinner.  He deserved it, he was pregnant.


Severus looked up at the knock to his office door.  "Enter."  The object of his thoughts walked in, making him sneer.  "Sit down, Mr. Malfoy.  We must have a serious discussion."

"Did I hex that little brat in Hufflepuff too hard?" he sneered back.

"No, you're being chosen for a special assignment outside this school."  He silenced the room.  "You are not my first choice, but you're about the only one.  You or Granger and the person in question has asked not to be surrounded by chattering females."  Draco sat down, one eyebrow slightly raised. "You've read on Hellmouths?"

"You taught us last month in Defense when the teacher was out.  I thought you said they were myths."

"Most wizards believe they are.  They are not and I know someone who is recently back from one," he offered quietly.  "He is in a very...delicate condition.  His energies have been warped by the darkness there.  There are also injuries, both physical and spell-bourne, that will complicate matters.  I will have need of a potions person there and were I to go myself it would look rather...odd."  The boy looked more and more interested.  "There are rules however, partially for your own safety.  While at my house...."

"Your house?"

"My house," he agreed.  "A problem with that?"

"No, Professor, just unexpected.  I had no idea you had anyone that close to you."

"If you must know, it is my son.  His mother took him and chose to raise him on the hellmouth, the one that's currently open.  I loathe his mother with every breath in my body for that.  The injuries my son has seen are numerous and this has been the final one his body can bear."  Draco nodded more quickly at that.  "While you are helping my son, you may not contact your father.  He may contact you but not the other way around.  Anything of pertinence can be gotten through me."  Draco nodded at that, smirking just a bit. "Your school work would be stated as being on a special research project.  You would be required to brew many potions, some of them you will wonder about.  You are not to ask questions unless he feels like sharing things.  I'm sure he will over the eight months you'll be there."

"Eight months?" he asked.  "Why so long?  I thought the standard unraveling of magic could be done within hours, days for truly bad cases."

"It can be normally.  In this case haste is not an option and it would harm him more," he said calmly.  "While you are there, you will not pester him for information but you may get him to open up.  He has seen quite a lot on his hellmouth, including slayers and friends going bad.  It was his friends who led to his latest injury.  He is still quite peeved at them.  He blew up the garden earlier."

"Then he is a wizard?"

"Yes, though he chooses not to use it.  He refused to go to a school to learn.  At this time you will be expected to help tutor him in that delicate subject.  He has finally relented."

"Relented?" Draco asked.  "Does he see it as a burden?"

"His mother was an unfortunate choice on my part.  She got pregnant after our single night together and then took him there to live with a muggle."

"Oh, I see."  He nodded a few times.  "All right.  So potions, tutoring, knowledge whenever I can get him to talk.  The downside?"

"Weasley.  Possibly Potter if something happens.  Needless to say I'm not the only one who would be concerned about his welfare.  You are not to tell anyone what you learn.  Not your father, not the headmaster, not your minions, not your journal.  No one."

"All right.  And the other downside?  That's still too many positives for just Weasley for eight months and being unable to be badgered by my father."

Snape smirked.  "The injury is one that will bother you and give you nightmares for years to come, but it would probably be the sort to ignite curiosity in an area that your father would not approve of.  It was done by one of those wandless people."  Draco's mouth fell open and he hopped up. "One of my son's best friends," he said quietly.

"Bloody hell, did they torture him?"  Snape nodded. "How?"

"That is to be divulged after I have your word and you have written your father."

"I see."  He considered it, then came up with the only possible answer.  "I'll have access to your library?"  Snape nodded.  "The potions I'll be making?"

"I'll be going over them with you tomorrow to make sure you have them down."

"Higher level?"

"Medical grade," he noted.  "Necessary in certain circumstances and for the unwarping.  It would be you, Weasley, to work on the shields, Longbottom would be here but privy to some information should he guess why he is picking and cultivating certain plants for your use, and possibly Potter should something drastic start to happen.  Also be aware that my son is every bit as stubborn as I am.  It will simply come out in odder manners."

"I see."  He nodded once.  "So I'll be doing medical and potions?"

"The nurse will be visiting often. You'll be doing it in the interim."

"Interesting."  He renewed his thoughts, going back over the pros and cons.  "Fine, I'll do it.  I will not room with Weasley however."

"Not an issue.  You'll have your own room next to Xander's."

"That's his name?"  Snape nodded. "Short for...."

"Alexander but he loathes the full version."

"I can see why.  Very well then, when do we leave?"

"Tomorrow morning."  He handed over everything the boy needed for a letter.  "Write your father, Draco.  He'll need to know and not worry."

Draco smirked and sat down to write it.  "Dear father, I hope this finds you well.  A bit of news with me that I have to share, upon orders.  I'm being chosen for a select project that requires the careful and delicate unraveling of dark magics.  During this eight month process I will be unavailable for comment.  You may write me I'm told, or send me cookies if mother decides to make some, but I may not write you back.  Anything of true importance can be given through Professor Snape and gotten to me immediately."  He reread it then nodded, adding a note at the bottom. "I've also just learned that certain myths are reality and in fact I'll be working with something to do with a hellmouth.  That's all I can tell you and please do not bother Professor Snape overly much.  He's sworn my safety and needs will be taken care of adequately."  He signed his name with a flourish and handed it over, then the quill and inkpot.  "There, it should drive him up the wall and be enough to bother you instead of your son."

"It should," he agreed, drying it and sealing it into an envelope.  He handed it to his owl, who took it and flew off.  "My son is pregnant," he said quietly.  Draco fell out of his chair, mouth still open.  "The wandless one and his other best friend decided to do this to him to tie him closer to them.  He showed up earlier today with the news."

"He's male though," Draco said, standing up and dusting himself off.  "He is male?"

"And should stay that way," he agreed with an evil smirk.  "As I said, it should give you many new ideas and many nightmares at the same time."

"You're not shitting me," he said, staring at him.  Snape shook his head. "How?  That's against all natural laws!  I know very well they go by them!"

"She's living on a hellmouth, Draco, and she's tainted as well.  I found out when I was summoned that the Dark Lord is having her watched.  As far as he is concerned, my son is terminating it tomorrow morning."

Draco swallowed.  "That'll definitely be a challenge, give me new information, and possibly quite a lot of power."

"Again, you may not tell anyone.  Not your journal, your owl, your stuffed sheep in the bottom of your trunk.  Nothing and no one, Mr. Malfoy."

"Agreed.  No one would believe me anyway."  He looked around then back at him.  "He's not coming here?"

"We thought it safer not to bring him here," he noted. "The nurse and infirmary will be on standby in case there is something too terrible for you to handle."

"All right," he decided, nodding.  "Maybe I'll let Crabbe or Goyle carry mine so my spouse won't have to."

Snape snorted. "There is one further complication that may crop up sometime in the future. My son's former lover is a demon.  A vengeance demon. We have taken the knowledge from her but it may be returned.  Should that happen you will call me immediately, Mr. Malfoy."

Draco nodded at that.  "Not like I want to deal with them.  Who's the other parent?"

"I would assume the witches but we have no idea yet."

"Very well then.  When are you telling the two goodie goodies?"

Snape smirked. "Within the hour.  You'll need time to pack and there are two house elves there.  Do be gentle with them.  They've served my family for generations."

"Of course."  He left, going to be in shock in his room.  A pregnant male!  Only a woman could've thought up that torture!

Snape went to prepare himself for the next meeting.  The general one with Gryffindors. How he loathed them.


Snape looked at the interested faces.  Then he looked at Draco, who only smirked back. "You four have been chosen for a special project," he announced, sneering down his nose at them.  "You may not speak of it to anyone.  Not the headmaster, not your journals, not teddybears mummy and daddy sent with you. You will be leaving the school tomorrow morning to portkey to the shielded location, where you shall be unraveling some very dark and troubling magic."  He pointed at the board behind him. "It has to do with that matter, which I can assure you are real."  Ron's mouth dropped open.  "Also, there will be injuries on this person.  You are not to coddle him but let him do mostly whatever he wants, within reason.  He is not having a good year," he sneered.  Draco snickered at that.  "He will be going for potions and medical support.  Mr. Weasley, I'm assured you can handle the maintenance and powering of the shields on the house.  Mr. Potter, you and Mr. Longbottom will stay here to do your parts unless something comes up."  He moved closer. "No one, and I do mean no one, is to know about this.  I cannot stress this enough."

"So the Dark Lord would be interested in this?" Harry asked quietly.  Snape nodded.  "That's fine then.  I'm here as a diversion away from him and to go if he needs protecting?"

"You are," he agreed.  "Or if Mr. Weasley needs help."

"That's fine then."

Longbottom raised his hand slowly.  "Why am I being told?"

"It was thought you were intelligent enough to wonder why you were being told to nurture and pick certain plants for our use.  If not, I'm sorry I overestimated you."  He blushed and shook his head.  "From now on, Madam Pomfrey or myself will need certain herbs.  We'll be going to you directly, Mr. Longbottom.  Madam Sprout will know that you are engaged on this project and will not be getting any information."

"If you want, Professor."  He looked at Draco.  "Do you have the list?"  It was handed over.  He looked it over, then frowned.  "I don't know a thing about two of them.  Do I have permission to look them up?"

"As long as no one wonders why, Longbottom," he said tiredly.

Ron raised his hand.  "I'm there to up and defend the shields.  Anything else?"

"Try not to get in Mr. Malfoy's way.  Try not to blow up the house.  Also try not to blow up the person you'll be helping.  If you and the young man in question do hit it off, you are not to pester him for information.  If he volunteers it, that's up to him."  Ron nodded. "Any other questions?"  He shook his head. "Your parents will be told that they may write you but only general information will be given back to them."

"The holidays?" Ron asked.  "Mum's a bit big on them."

"If I can have you sprung, I will consider it."

"Thank you, sir.  Any other instructions?"

"Do not tax the house elves.  They are my personal ones."

"Yes, sir," they all agreed.

"Dismissed."  They left and he stopped Draco, handing over a small book.  "You'll need to study that mostly.  She's agreed those are the best there are."

"All right.  Thank you, Professor.  I do agree about not telling them the true cause until they get there," he muttered. "Weasley would blab."

He nodded. "Probably by throwing a fit."  Draco nodded and headed off to finish his packing and read the book.  Snape sat down to rest his poor head.  He had such a headache.  He summoned a house elf.  "Get me a bottle of the headache medicine from my personal cabinet and some wine to dilute it."  The house elf nodded and went to do that, bringing both back for him.  Then it disappeared and reappeared with dinner, then left again.  He grimaced but he would eat.  He would need to keep up his strength.


Xander woke up to a loud thumping noise and climbed out of the bed, heading downstairs.  He ran into two boys, who were arguing.  "And I thought my friends were bitchy," he said in greeting.  "You woke me up."

"Sorry about that, Xander.  He landed on me," Draco admitted, dusting himself off.  "Your father will be by in about an hour if you wanted to bathe and eat before then.  I'll be going over your care with the nurse at that time as well."

"You are?" he asked impatiently.

"Draco Malfoy."  He held out a hand. "Here to take care of the interim medical and potion issues."

Xander shook it.  "Okay.  And you?" he asked the other guy.

"Ron Weasley. I'm doing the defense stuff."  He shook his hand with a grin.  "I'm assuming Professor Snape will finish telling us what's going on when he gets here?"

Draco cleared his throat.  "This is Professor Snape's son, Xander Harris. He was born and raised on the hellmouth in California.  His friends, one a wandless bitch and the other a slayer, enacted a spell to bind him to their whims by making him pregnant.  Needless to say, both sides want to know how and have the child."

Ron blinked a few times, then fainted.

Draco stepped over him, smiling at Xander. "Always wanted to do that."

"Dad said you were a prick, but okay," he decided, turning around and heading back upstairs.  "Have the house elves start breakfast.  I'll be back down soon."

"Of course. Anything in particular?"


"I suppose it won't hurt until I know if it's allowed or not," Draco admitted, going to order the house elves around, leaving Weasley lying there.  It suited him to be a rug.

Snape and the nurse appeared, both looking down at the unconscious boy. "I believe Draco told him," he noted dryly, heading for the kitchen.  "Where is my son?"


"Thank you.  Xander!"  He came down the back stairs buttoning his shirt.  "The nurse is here."

"Good.  I'm still having coffee.  Anyone who doesn't like it can bite me."

"With as many vampires as your town must have, is that a wise thing to say?" Draco asked.

Xander looked at him, then smirked.  "You're pale enough but in the sun.  Since there's none here it's pretty damn safe."  Draco snickered at that.  "Should one appear, I'll teach you how to stake them."  He looked over as the nurse and Ron walked in.  "Before you say a word, I am having coffee.  I live on caffeine."

The nurse snorted and shook her head. "Not any longer."

"I can go hide in Alaska, woman, and let the muggles deliver it.  I'm sure they'd make quite a spectacle of it."

She rolled her eyes.  "Fine.  If you insist."  He nodded.  "Try to modulate your intake to under three cups a day."

"Try being a good word," he agreed.  He looked at Ron as he wobbled in.  "You okay?"

"Did you kill them?" he demanded.  "Because, bloody hell mate, I'd have slugged both bitches until they were begging, black and blue, and bleeding to death!"

He shrugged. "I found out and I came here to blow up the garden. I thought maybe Dad might have an idea of what to do."

Ron shuddered.  "Can I hit 'em for you?  That's just...wrong!  So very wrong!  'Mione would be starting a new organization to boycott them and make them human again wrong!"

"You still can't tell her," Draco said in a sing-song voice.  He nudged Xander. "Sit and eat. That way we can get the necessary things out of the way and he can finish destroying the garden.  Very nice circle by the way."

"Purely emotional."  He sat down and got to work on breakfast.  "Anyone else hungry?" he offered, since they were all staring.

"We ate nearly an hour ago," Ron assured him.  "If you need it, I can have someone talk to my mum about pregnancy stuff.  She had seven of us so she should know and I'm sure your da could make it subtle enough not to tick her off."

"That will come later.  For now, I've got some wonderful books in my bag," Madam Pomfrey assured them all.  "It'll go over all the major changes and problems you'll be facing."  Xander looked a bit scared at that.  "Some things, like piles, are normal."

"Piles are...."

"Hemorrhoids," Draco said helpfully.

"Oh, wonderful," Xander said bitterly.  "Are we sure I can't change my mind?"

"For another two hours, yes," she agreed, smiling at him.  "I told you it had to be made by today."

"I'm having a craptastic incarnation."

She hugged him. "I understand how this isn't what you imagined, Xander, but it will be all right.  I promise you it will."  She smoothed his hair out.  "Now, you finish up so we can look you over and I'll show Draco all the necessary checking spells while Mr. Weasley looks over the shields with Professor Snape."  That got a bunch of nods.  "Good.  Eat."  She went to talk to the house elves about his diet, getting immediate agreement. They wanted a baby to take care of too.

Xander looked at Draco.  "Trade ya places."

"Not on your bloody life, Xander," he said with a smirk.  "I'd make a horribly cranky pregnant person."

"That's different from usual how?" Ron asked.  Draco glared.

"We will get along," Professor Snape ordered.  "Or else I will crucio both of you."

"Yes, sir," they agreed.

"Gee, dad, were you turned?  I've seen some vampires who aren't as scary as you."  Xander ate another bite.

"Quite.  It is rather bright out today."  He sat down, accepting a plate of tea and biscuits.  "Thank you."

"So, anything I have to do today beside be checked over, poked, prodded, and nagged?"

"I'm going to go over the shielding with Mr. Weasley.  Madam Pomfrey will be going over your health details with Mr. Malfoy.  They have both been instructed not to nag you."  Xander shrugged at that.  "Also, they are to tutor you whenever you're bored.  That way you know where you're going with the magic within you."

"Small point I thought of last night," Draco admitted.  "His wand?"

"I hadn't wanted to think about that," Snape admitted.  "I'll sneak him to Ollivander later today."  Draco nodded.  "Before we go, I'll show you my work area.  That should be fully stocked and you only need to write me to get something that's not down there."

"Of course.  Does he have clothes and things?" Ron asked.

"My stuff's going to be picked up later.  I called a demon that owed me a favor and he's getting someone to pick my boxes of crap up," Xander admitted quietly.

"Inside the shield?" Draco asked.

"No, in the garden.  It's not a harmful one and it can't track me that way.  It took some hair so it could link back here."  That got a nod from his father.  "Emergency portkey to a secondary location?"

"I'll have one set up completely within the week, Xander."

"Cool.  I'm supposing I can pick up some extra sweats and stuff since I'm going to be fat soon?"  His father nodded.  "Thanks for that as well.  Can we pick up some chocolate?"

"Of course," he agreed patiently.  "Anything else you think you'll need?"

"Something for my sanity," he noted dryly.  "I still think this is a bad dream.  Oh, Draco, she said I'm going at time and a half speed."

"Wonderful.  Your father briefed us for eight months worth of work but we can probably use the rest of the time to study.  I would like to see if I can learn more about where you grew up without pestering and nagging you for information."

"Sure.  I'll put everything into a pensieve so I don't have to remember the brats."

"That would be most kind and helpful," he agreed.  Ron shuddered.  "What?" he asked blandly.

"That his friends, females, did that to him.  Are you sure we can't kill 'em for you?"

"The Dark Lord may be watching over one of their shoulders," Snape noted dryly.  "I'm sure he wouldn't mind."

"What about the Ministry?" Draco asked.

"They should have no reason to come around and I will be concocting a good enough story for the existence of any child."  Draco nodded at that.  "Why?"

"I was more suggesting that they could take the witch."

"They're not prepared or equipped to handle a wandless one," Ron said bitterly.  "Pity but they can do things with candles and will that we need a wand for."  He sighed and leaned down some, leaning on his elbows.  "We'll help wherever we can, mate.  I'll try not to stare in horror now and then too but the thought is still wrecking my mind."

"Think how I feel," Xander said bitterly.  "I found out yesterday."  He finished his toast and the nurse came back to gather him and Draco to check him over.  "I still feel nasty and itchy."

"That's the excess magic inside you, Xander," she said gently, leading him up to his room to examine him with Draco's help.

Ron looked at his most hated professor.  "So," he said dryly, shrugging a bit.  "Shields, defense, garden reconstruction, anything else?"  Snape gave him an amused look.  "I saw the bare spot.  My sister does the same thing.  I've had to tempt grass to regrow before, sir.  Am I handling anything else for you?"

"You may end up helping tutor him."

"Sure.  Not an issue.  I have a few decent enough classes."  Snape nodded at that.  "Should we set up capturing crystals for the magic he's leaking?"

"We have a few around the house.  I was going to pick up some more today for his room and the common rooms I'll assume he'll be spending the most time in."  Ron nodded at that again.  "Anything else you can suggest?"

"Fun things for him to do.  If he's at all like me, studying will drive him loonier than this problem will."  He sat up fully.  "Unless he's like Hermione?"  His father shook his head.  "Then you're going to need to keep him entertained now and then, Professor.  He'll need something to take his mind off his problems as it were and I don't take him for knitting."

"I'll look into that as well," he agreed.  "Any other flaws?"

"Yup.  Hermione herself.  She'll badger Longbottom to death."

"He doesn't know what you do."

"Doesn't mean she won't be checking over his shoulder and trying to figure out why she was excluded.  Not that I'd blame him.  I'd hate women too."  He shrugged.  "I'd have killed the bitches personally, then come over here to cry on your shoulder.  Then again, I've been in way too many fights."

"Indeed, though I had thought the same thing," he admitted, seeing why Potter relied on Weasley now.  "I'll talk with her about it needing to be only males that help with this matter and make sure she ignores this project.  Any other flaws?"

"Two.  One, mum usually blushes when she says anything about being pregnant, especially about the second trimester?  Knowing my mum, it was a good time to celebrate," he said blandly, smirking a bit.  "Might need stuff to handle that."  Snape gave him a horrified look.  "Secondly, Hermione's been sick a lot recently.  Someone needs to see why because we're pretty sure she's not pregnant.  It's looking more and more like wandless magic poisoning.  And she likes my sister as her helper."

"I'll look her over myself," he replied.  "When were you bringing this to our attention?"

"Harry and I have been nagging and working our way up to ordering her to go.  Hasn't worked yet. Since you've got to make her ignore Neville anyway....."  He shrugged.

"I'll definitely check her and your sister both," he assured him.  Because that was a scary thought.  Granger would be just as bad as Rosenburg.  So would Weasley.  "Thank you for making sense."

"I do usually, it's just that you don't see us when we're not in class, Professor.  After all, it's not like it's *luck* that keeps Harry alive."  He got up and headed to look around.  "Which room's mine?" he called when he found them.

"I want the one next to him, you take across the hall," Draco called back.  "That way I'm closer in case something happens."

"Sure."  He grabbed his trunk and bag, putting them into his room and settling in to unpack.  Then he went back downstairs.  "Shields and stuff, Professor?"

"This way," he agreed, leading him to where they were anchored so he could be merged with them.


Xander sank down on the couch later that night, looking at the two boys staring at him. "I'm not that fascinating or that dangerous."

"You are that dangerous, you're leaking dark magic," Draco noted patiently, "and you are that fascinating.  I'm using you to see if I can get my bodyguards this way so I don't have to marry Parkinson and be forced to sleep with her to get an heir."

Ron gave him a disgusted look.  "Euagh!  Crabbe and Goyle?"  Draco shrugged.  "Get Zabini.  At least he's pretty!"  He shuddered.  "I can't imagine the two blocks of stone that follow you around *crying* from a hormone swing."

Xander snorted.  "Don't remind me about those, please.  I'm sure I'll have plenty of fun with them soon enough."

"You should see his two bodyguards."

"That was not their choice," Draco said quietly, looking at him.  "They're indebted to the family."  Ron groaned at that.  "They're not totally horrible.  They're nice enough when it's just us and it does give me someone to protect me while I think.  As I'm sure you and Potter do for Granger."

"No, she tells us to go away," he said dryly, smirking some.  "She's a shrieker, mate.  Plus she's pushy about revision and stuff.  Makes us at wand point some years."

"One cannot live on quidditch, especially with how badly you play," Malfoy said dryly.

Ron snorted.  "You'd be surprised.   Besides, I've already got a job lined up."  He looked at Xander.  "What about you?"

"I was working.  Nothing fulfilling but it was work."  He felt magic start and clenched the arms of his chair.  "Incoming magic.  Not your kind."  They got up to check on things.  Xander squeaked when he disappeared, chair and all.  He looked at the man in front of him.  "I don't like you."  He got up and glared at him. "What gives you the right to kidnap me?"

"You're mine by right of your father being mine."

"Hmm.  And the fact that I've fought on the side of *good* for years now?"  The man laughed.  "Hmm."  Xander pulled the dagger off his back and stuck him with it in the stomach, then watched him fall.  "Not yours.  By the way, I'd like my father back."  He lowered the shields on him, letting the magic searching Willow was doing lock onto him there.  He waved.  "Bye bye."  He reappeared in Sunnydale, looking at her.  "Do you know how incredibly pissed I am with you and Buffy?" he asked conversationally.


"Gee, Willow, don't know why I would be.  Think back *really hard* to a spell you two did together."  He walked around her and out of his bedroom, heading to the spare portkey he had for his father's place.  Buffy popped up and he punched her, making her grab her nose.  "I don't like you anymore either.  Thank you anyway."  He found the portkey.  "I'm never coming back, please put my stuff in storage," he ordered when Willow came out.  "I'm going to go join the bad guy's side since at least they want me and respect me somewhat.  They'd never magic me the way you two did."  He disappeared and reset the magic shielding him so he couldn't be found again.  He walked past Ron, handing him the portkey.  "Bloody women," he muttered as he hiked back into the house.  He got stopped by Draco.  "Tell dad his former boss has his chair if he wants it back and I told Willow to put my stuff into storage."  He got free and headed up to his room, going to bed.  He was tired.

Ron and Draco shared a look then Draco went to call Snape while Ron checked the wards.  They were missing something.  Ron came back.  "He's using either demonic, Chinese, or some form of wandless I can't find.  It felt demonic to me."

"It's very possible," Snape said.  "I'll bring you a book tonight on how to add those into the wards."  Ron nodded. "Is he all right?"

"He said your chair is with your former boss and then said something about women.  He came back by portkey."  Ron held it up.

"That came from Sunnydale," Snape admitted.  "Thank you, boys.  Lock it down for the night.  I'll be up soon."  He hung up and went to his quarters to swear for a moment before going to the library to get the books they would need.  In there he found his other two targets working on something.  He grabbed them once he had sent the books off with a portkey from the restricted section.  "We will be discussing some things, ladies."  He walked them down to his office and tuned a scrying pool he kept on his son to his son's best friends.  "Watch the redhead.  See where you are heading," he sneered, sitting down.

They watched and Ginny Weasley went pale.  "They did what!  That's against the laws of nature!  You cannot warp time that way!"

Snape nodded.  "Indeed it is.  As is what you were studying earlier."  She glared.  He sneered.  They weren't going to win this one.  He used his wand to send a few memories from his pensieve over for their viewing displeasure.  "Continue."  By the time they were done, Hermione was gagging and Ginny was pale and shaky.  "That is where you tread.  Now, we shall be cleaning the dark influences from you before you do die of them or infect others."  He stood up.  "Shall we go now or shall I call the aurors for illegal and underaged magic use?"  They shook their heads and followed, thinking about what they had seen.


Xander looked up as the paper came in, catching it when the owl dropped it.  "Thanks."  He settled in to read it, frowning at the news on the front page.  "Wonder if Dad used Rosenburg for an example."  He kept reading.

Draco walked in.  "That thing is pure trash, Xa...."  He snatched it to read the top story.  "Oh, bloody hell.  Weasel!"  Ron came jogging down the stairs.  "Your sister was nearly arrested," he said fondly, handing it over.

"Knew it.  She couldn't just get pregnant, noooo, she had to play with wandless and dangerous shite."  He sat down to read it, shaking his head.  "Well, at least I'm here when Mum hears and starts to scream at them and Dumbledore for letting them do this.   I won't have to find a hiding spot."

Xander took it back.  "I'm still wondering if he's using Rosenburg as a good example."  He went back to his reading, letting the boys giggle at that.  "By the way, I told her I was going to be joining the bad guys."  He grinned over the edge of the paper.  "Since she's the one who took me from the snot-faced asshole's grasp.....  I'm going to draw a conclusion and cackle while she does the work for us."  He turned the page and went back to reading.

"If she does, there's many who would forgive her for using wandless and dark magic," Draco admitted. "But then they'd fear she'd take over."

"Mutual destruction?" Ron suggested, looking at Draco.  "They're both powerful if he took Xander from under the shields."

"Buffy would be coming too," Xander reminded him.  "A slayer and one of the most powerful witches in the world today."  He turned the page again.  "Hmm, sale at Madam Malkin's.  Dad never did take me to get sweats."

"We'll arrange it then," Draco decided.  "I can easily sneak off to get some clothes."  He looked at him.  "Wands I'm not sure about."

"He wanted to get more capturing crystals too," Ron noted. "Spread more around."

"Let's start a list," Draco decided, going to get a quill and parchment from his schoolbag.  He sat down to check some supplies and started on what he'd need for the rest of the month.  He didn't have hardly any paper left.  He walked back down there, letting Ron have it.  "Add yours."  Ron read it over and added some, then handed it to Xander.  "Put your sizes down as well."

Xander nodded and wrote out a shorter list than they had.  Sweats, t-shirts, and sneakers were good enough for him.  His wand was something else.  "How would we do the wand?"

"We'll sneak you there and close the store for a few," Ron suggested.  "I can have Harry help me.  We've got his invisibility cloak."  Draco gave him an odd look.  "We do."

"That's how you do it," he said, glaring at him.  Ron just smirked.  Draco huffed.  "Bastard!"

"It was his father's.  Dumbledore gave it to him.  Never tells him crap but he gave it to him.  Actually he gave it to him and then told him not to worry about the guy who was giving him migraines."  Draco gaped.  Ron nodded.  "You wondered why the teachers never got involved?"

"No, I realized why last year during that bollox."  He took the list back and looked at him.  "We can have the house elves get the food things."  He ripped off the bottom portion and copied it.  One of them came over at his glare.  "Xander requires these things."  It nodded and left with a pop of displaced air.  "Okay.  Get dressed.  We'll sneak that way.  I'm sure Weasley has some way of hitting Potter even if he's in class."

Ron snorted and nodded, pulling his wand to touch a spot on it, concentrating.  He got a nod.  "Ten minutes, Diagon.  Come out the floo down by the petshop.  Me first."  He got up.  "Go get dressed, Xander."  He sighed but got up to do that.  "You'll follow a few minutes later, that way it won't draw attention because we're together.  It'll look like Harry and I are on some personal errands with our wands.  You cover the herbs, the bookstore, and the clothes?"

"Works for me.  I can always apparate that way and make a quick run."  He went to get his bag of allowance that was automatically filled from the bank every month.  It was emptier than it should be but he would deal with that once he was down there.  He did hate his father some months.  He watched them go, then apparated to the bank, hurrying inside.  He presented his key.  "Now."  The goblin nodded and made note, then sent him down to his vault.


Ron came out of the floo and there was a swish of silvery fabric, which went over Xander's body as he came out and uncovered Harry standing there.  "Harry."  He hugged him with lots of back slapping.  "Shoes," he hissed.  Xander's shoes were covered.  "I've got to get my wand fixed.  Buggered it again," he said dryly as they headed that way, Xander behind them.  He walked into the shop and waited while the witch in front of them chatted and bought some wand polish.  She smiled at them and left with a nod.  "Harry?"  Harry got the doors and windows closed and sealed.  Mr. Ollivander gave him an amused look.  He pulled the cloak off Xander, pointing at him.  "Snape's son Xander.  We're tutoring him.  He's got wandless magic poisoning from his old town."

"Interesting."  He came over to look at him.  "I...."

"Not a word," Harry warned.  "They did it to him."

"I can be discreet, Mr. Potter," he chided.

"Think what both sides would do to have this one?" Xander asked quietly.  That got a nod and the older man pulled him back away from the windows to work on a wand with him. "I'm sorry about that but it is for her safety."

Ollivander smiled.  "I do understand, young man, and you are my most challenging fit so far this decade.  The bad magic will be worn out?"

"Slowly but yes," Ron agreed.

"Very well.  Let's see what we can do that'll stay with him afterward."  He pulled down one that was mossy looking.  "Foxfire and oak from a troll bridge."  Xander flicked it and nothing happened.  "Hmm.  Interesting."  He took it back and searched his hands and wrists.  "I can feel the blockage."

"Oh, I had that done unless I'm too upset.  I was having accidental magic explosions for no reason," Xander admitted, pulling out his pocket knife and slicing over the marks on his wrist.  That freed the blockage and he picked up the wand again once the knife was back in his pocket. It created a glow but nothing else.

"Here, let's clean that up," Ollivander said, collecting the blood.  "In case it becomes useful  you know," he said with a small smile.  "After all, with as much energy as you've got you're nearly a magical creature."

"I feel like one too.  How fast do cravings start?"

"Last week," Ron told him.  "We get them all the time.  Means you need to add to your diet, Xander."  Ollivander smiled and nodded, pulling down a few more for him to try.

Draco popped in and looked at them.  "Still at it?"

"Yup," Ron admitted.  "You done?"

"Nearly so.  I explained it as I'm on a private errand for Professor Snape for a project.  The sweats were already sent back.  The other stuff was sent to him.  Why is he bleeding?"

"I had a chaos sorcerer do some boundaries on my wrists so I wouldn't do any accidental leaking, only if I was too backed up or too emotional."  Xander tried the next one, it sparked.  "Thank you."

"You are quite welcome.  Now, as you grow less magic-sucking, because you are, it should follow you.  If not, come back after all of this is over with and we'll see if anything else fits you better."  Xander nodded.  "Nine-three please," he told Ron, who paid him for the wand.  "Thank you, boys.  Any other errands?"

"I hope not," Ron said.  "List?"  Draco looked and shook his head.  "Candy shop?  Joke shop?"

"Not near your brothers," Draco said firmly. "They'd be able to sense the dark magic."

"I can go pick stuff up," Harry offered.  "Send it through Snape."  That got a grin from Ron.  "Good enough then.  Anything else?"

"Stuff to make sure I don't lose my mind," Xander said, putting the cloak around himself.  "Thanks, guys."

"Welcome," Draco agreed.  He pointed at the floo and got a nod.  "We can leave from here."  He escorted Xander back and Ron unsealed the shop then they left together, going back to do a bit of personal shopping.  "I told Snape about Hermione and Ginny."

"I saw the paper.  Is he okay?"


"How bad is it?"  Ron looked at him.  "Can't tell me?"

"Not yet.  Should be obvious in a few though."  He grinned as he walked into his twin brothers' shop.  "I'm on a special project and I'm gathering stuff to make sure I don't go more insane for the next eight months," he said at the curious looks.  "Yes, the parents know. See about Ginny?"  He headed for his favorite section.

Harry grinned. "I'm playing bodyguard."  They smiled at them.  "Thanks, guys."

"Hey, blights, I'm going to be working with a healer.  Any of these objectionable to them?"

"No," they said.

"Nothing in case she might be preggers?  I haven't met her yet," Ron offered.  "I know she's young though."

"That would and you'd have to use the plant and run method for the explosive ones," one offered.

"What are you doing for eight months?" the other asked.

"Can't tell you," he said grimly.  "I can't even write it in my journal if I kept one.  After it's all over with maybe."

"For the..."

"War?" they asked in their unique twin way.

"Could be," Ron admitted, shrugging.  "Not sure yet."  He got a huge basket of stuff and found a few capturing crystals, holding them up.  "What're these for?"

"Those are for capturing the excess energy that a prank could give off.  You'd better take a few with you," one of them ordered as he moved to ring him up.

The other looked at the things.  "Some of those aren't you usual, Ronniekins."

"I thought I'd branch out.  I'll be bored stupid studying and things by the time I'm done."  They gave him another look.

"Guys, if he tells you, his life's in danger," Harry said quietly.  "Drop it."  They nodded and just accepted the heavily discounted tab.  "Thanks, guys."  He grinned.  "Send anything for him through me at the school.  I'm playing bodyguard for him to make sure he doesn't blab."

"Harry!" he complained.  Harry just smirked.  "Fine, bastard."  Harry shrugged at that and waved, heading off to the chocolate and sweet shop to make a dent in there.  Then Ron apparated off and Harry went back to the school.  He handed the receipts to Professor Snape between classes.  "Because you didn't get to go yesterday," he said quietly.  "Only Ollivander saw him and he realized.  He said he's being discreet."

"That was a problem we couldn't have helped.  I can only hope he will be.  Anything else?"

"Draco said he had stuff shipped to you for the special project you're working on in your private time."  He smiled and walked off.

Snape looked at the receipts.  "They went to the joke shop?" he asked blandly.  "Plus the candy store?  My poor son," he moaned, sighing.  He would pay for it.  His son would need some amusement soon.  This had to be trying for him.


Draco ran into the wall of boredom after the first ten charms and stopped for the time being.  "That's enough for now."  Xander relaxed and put his wand down.  "Practice those later when you can't sleep."

"How did you know?"

"You were wandering and muttering."


"Not a problem."  He glanced around but Weasley was in the garden trying to fix the destruction.  "If you felt you had to confide in someone, I would be here for that as well.  The same as Weasley would.  I have watched your memories and I would still kill the bitches."  Xander grinned at that.  "How did you keep up with your last one?"

"Determination and she embarrassed the hell out of me when I didn't."  He felt a tingling and looked down, then up and blocked the magic, making it quit.  "I hate my exes.  She just tried something."

Draco waved his wand and nodded, canceling the spell.  "Syphilis is not fun."

"I remember. I got it from some ghosts one Thanksgiving."  Draco gaped.  He shrugged. "We disturbed their rest."

He shuddered.  "At least it was fixed."  Ron came in and got some water then went back out there.   He looked at Xander again, seeing the spots.  He frowned and canceled the spell as well.  "Weasley!" he snapped.  He came in and saw the magic going off.  That got a snort from the redhead and he went to where the shields were, blocking out all magic for the time being.  "Thank you!"

"Welcome."  He came back.  "I turned up to block all magic for a bit.  Can't last that way for more than an hour.  Can we do something about that?"

"If it's my ex, we're supposed to call Dad," Xander reminded them.

"It's not.  It's someone else," Draco assured him.  "Young, female, wandless.  Feels similar to the ones who cast on you."

Xander sat up.  "Dawn?"  Draco shrugged.  He pulled out a picture, which had a lock of her hair. "Her?"  He tested it then nodded. "Buffy's sister.  She loves me.  She'd never hurt me.  She's annoying me so I call."

Ron shrugged.  "Then maybe she should hit a school.  She's how old?"

"Fourteen," he sighed.  "But then again, she just got created recently."  He went to call his father, finding him in the middle of class.  "Dad, quick question.  Dawn?"

His father considered it.  "I'll look into it.  Go rest."  Xander's head nodded and then it disappeared from the fireplace.  "Ignore that," he ordered his students, watching them get back to work.  She was a powerful artifact.  His son had told him everything about the young lady in question last night.  He got up and went into his office with a sweep of his robe, going to call on her.  If she had any gifts, she would hear the floo and answer it.  "Dawn Summers."  Her head popped up immediately but she went from happy to scowling.  "I am Xander's father."

"Interesting.  May I come through?"



"Because he's not in any shape to deal with others."

"I saw.  You'll still need me. I'm the only anchor for what you need.  My mother will agree."

"I would have to speak with her."

She looked behind her.  "She's at work, Buffy's still in bed.  Show up in about four hours our time?"

"I can do that."

"And I can quit annoying Xander into calling me."  She smiled again.  "Mom told me what they did.  I told her I didn't want a sister if she did shit like that.  She agreed Buffy should probably go back to the college and live there from now on."  He smirked at that.  "We're on Xander's side."

"Good.  I shall see you later then.  Some determination will be made at that point."  She nodded again and disappeared.  He set a timer to go off for when he would have to leave.  Then he went back to terrorizing his students.  It was the most joy he got in any given day.


Snape landed on the back porch of a modest house in a warm place.  He tapped gently and a blonde girl answered it.  "I need to speak to your mother."

"No can do."

"Buffy, let him in," Dawn shouted.  "He's here about me."

"Why?" she shouted back.

"Gee, wonder," she quipped, coming out.  "Sir."  She let him in.  "He's here to make sure I'm in control, Buffy.  So I don't start leaking magic accidentally again."  Buffy looked horrified.  "Exactly.  Mom already knows.  Go on patrol or something."

"No, they gave you to me to watch."

Snape pulled his wand and hexed her.  "I feel slightly better now."

Dawn looked then at him.  "I'd have crucio'd her.  By the way, I've read the books, Professor. I know exactly who you are."  He smirked at that.  "Xander has them."

"Interesting.  He never mentioned that."  He sat down.  "Where is your mother?"

"Stuck with her last client.  I told her you were coming over."  He nodded at that.  "We've got some milk and water or juice if you'd like some."

"Some water would be pleasant," he agreed.  "Thank you, Miss Summers."

"It's not all of us who are bad people," she reminded him happily, getting up to get some.  Her mother walked in.  "He's here and Buffy's a statue."


"She got pushy with him.  I told her he was here to make sure I'm not going to accidentally leak magic again."

"That's a good idea," she agreed, taking her own glass of juice and heading out.  "Professor Snape.  Joyce Summers.  Please forgive my daughter, I have no idea what happened to her brains or soul, but I'm going to be finding out with my hairbrush later tonight with Rupert's help."

"He might like to watch that.   I'll have him scry it."  He sat down again, accepting his glass of ice water and plate of cookies sat in front of him.  "Please, sit."  Joyce sat down.  "Your younger one and I had a talk earlier after she tried to get Xander to contact her."

"Why?" she asked, looking at her daughter.

"I wanted to make sure he's okay.  You yelled really loudly, mom."  She sipped her milk and nibbled on a cookie.  "Xander is my buddy.  There's also no telling where Willow pulled the magic from to do the spell."

"With as much as he's sucked up over the years, she might not have pulled too much," he admitted.  He took a sip of his water.  Nothing in it except chemicals like the muggles put in their water.  Filtered but still present from the ice.

"I think they're going to need me to anchor something, like the dewarping of him and the baby," Dawn said quietly.  "Plus, I need to not turn into Willow."  Her mother nodded at that.  "Which means I need tutored and Willow's warping Tara now and then.  I was going through her."

"I understand."  She looked at the professor.  "What about your school?"

"She would not be allowed to use wandless.  We consider it an anathema."  She nodded at that.  "We're also still at war.  It could be dangerous for her.  There are ones here in the United States."

"I'd rather be near Xander in case he, or you, need me," Dawn told him.  "Let's face it, I'm more powerful than I need or feel comfortable with.  One way or another I need a tutor."

"You should," he agreed.  "That is a very mature choice."

She smirked.  "Sometimes I am a teenager and sometimes I'm still the Key, Professor.  This is the second time this has happened in history and they needed my energy then to anchor the father to life.  He was going to die when the child was born."

He sighed.  "I found an account but I could not be sure it wasn't a myth."

"No myth.  Unfortunately."  She swallowed the rest of her milk then put her glass down.  "You'll need me and I need teaching.  I can learn with Xander or at the school.  Either is acceptable to me.   Yes I can use a wand and even when I don't use a wand I need the ritual to keep myself in check."

"And the war?"

"I do believe Xander told them that he was going to join your bad guy when he left here after being kidnaped by Willow.  That he appreciated him," she offered with a small smirk.   "That would be a fight I'd buy ringside tickets for.  Buffy and Willow versus Voldemort."

He considered it.  "You and many others," he decided.  He sipped more of his water.  "You really should filter the water for the ice as well," he noted, putting his glass down.  "That many chemicals can't be good for a body."  Joyce smiled at that.  "I do work with potions," he reminded her.  "I can talk to my headmaster about her coming over.  Or I could sneak her in with Xander's lessons."

"Whichever you think would be safer."

"Neither is safe," Snape told her.  Joyce looked down at that but nodded.  "The school would be safer and she'd be within ten minutes of getting to him at the most."

"Then I'd rather it be the school," Joyce said, looking at her daughter. "Then she should come back here to study in the States."

"I agree," she assured her with a smile. "But I still want favorite babysitter status."  Snape smirked at that. "I do."  She stood up.  "What do I need to pack?"

"Everything."  She nodded, going to do that.  "If he won't accept her, I'll set her with my son," he promised quietly.  "That will give you the time to deal with your first child.  Before my son does."

"Oh, I agree.  She's getting it this time.  She and Willow both."  She smiled and held out a hand.  "You can reach me here, Professor.  Please keep me informed."

"Of course."  He shook her hand and stood up when Dawn came back down the stairs.  "Magically packed?"

"Packed earlier.  That's what got Buffy up and made her cranky."   She looked at her sister then kicked her in the side with enough magic added to break the hex.  "I'm going to undo what you did to Xander.  You evil bitch, we should turn it back onto you."  She walked out with him, listening to her mother laugh.  She ran back to give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.  "I'll write every week if I can."  She hurried off, grabbing her last bag from the kitchen.  The other two were grabbed and they portkeyed back to the school.  She landed and felt the wards go off.  "Wow.  The castle does not appreciate me yet."  The headmaster came running and she looked at him.  "Headmaster Dumbledore.  I'm asking to be admitted."

"Who are you?"

"Dawn Summers, sister of the Slayer."  He gaped.  "Also known as Dawn Summers of Sunnydale, adopted annoyance of his son's."  She nodded at Snape.  "I can do both types and do them both very well.  It's time I learned control."

He blinked a few times.  "Leave your things here and come to the office.  You as well, Severus.  You never said why you needed the leave."

Dawn put her things in the office and moved closer, whispering in his ear, making his eyes go wide again.  "As I said, I can do both flawlessly but I need lessons in control," she said quietly.  "We have no worry about me going dark.  I'm a very neutral being.  But I do love the books."  She smiled sweetly.

"I see.  Come.  Let's chat, dear."  He offered her his arm and walked off with her.  Snape walked behind them shaking his head at that move.  "Severus, how long have you known?"

"My son told me recently."

"I only came to full life recently," she quipped, smiling at him.  Dumbledore smiled at her.  "Really.  The monks gave me to my sister's care and she's a bitch to put it mildly.  My mother agreed I could use the control.  I've leaked magic a few times accidentally."

"I understand."  He walked her into the office, nodding at the aurors up there.  "This one has practiced both sorts of magic but she won't be going dark."

"How can you be sure?" the auror demanded.

Dawn looked her over, then snorted.  "Metamorphagus.  Cute.  Bet it's easier to date."  The woman glared at her.  "Dawn Summers, of Sunnydale."  She held out a hand. "Magical little sister of the Slayer."  The auror grinned and shook it.  "I've talked with Professor Snape.  Rosenburg had been training me. I need better control.  I've already seen evil and frequently spit on it.  Why do I want to go there?  I can go take over the world by sneezing back there if I wanted to."

"Point.  Headmaster?"

"It's an excellent idea plus she's decided to come here to help Professor Snape's son while he's injured?"  Severus nodded.  "How is he doing?"

"The students I have working on it are starting slowly.  Right now, we're working on gathering what he's naturally shedding.  It will make it easier later.  While they're doing that, they're working on his many injuries."

"Acceptable to me," he decided, looking at Dawn.  "Do you have a wand?"

She waved a hand and it came out of her bag downstairs.  "It was sent by the monks.  If it doesn't suit me, I'm sure I can to go Mr. Ollivander and offer him some blood or something to exchange it since I've lived on the hellmouth my whole life.  I go to school over it."  The auror looked horrified at that.  "My sister's years had their school library over it.  Fortunately no one ever went in there."  She smirked slightly.  "It's fine.  I'm in control but I need more lessons in it and I wanted to be closer to his son.  He's my buddy."

"Sure," she agreed.  "So no darkness?"

"Only if I start to leak it.  Then I can fully see wearing it out of me," she agreed.  "I'm sure Professor Snape can handle that."  She looked at the headmaster.  "My mother gave me permission for a year's study."

"That should be more than enough with your goals," he agreed.  "After that, we'll see what happens."  She nodded at that.  "Please light the candle on my desk, Miss Summers.  With the wand."  She nodded and flicked it, lighting it with a quietly murmured word.  "Excellent.  Severus?"

"My house?"

"The hat tells us that.  Get it for me please?"  Snape got the hat down and put it on her head.

"No.  I am not sorting this one," he said.

Dawn pulled it off and looked at it, then thought at it, making it hiss.  "I'm needed here for the year's lessons in control."

"You have much power, young lady."  Dawn smiled at that.  "And precious little sense with what's coming up."

"I know what's coming and I know I'm as safe here as I was at home.  Not like my sister could've stopped him."

"Good point.  Hmm.  Hero complex or power?"

"Oh, put her with me," Harry said, taking off his cloak from his corner.  "Miss Summers."

"Mr. Potter. I read the first three books."  She shook his hand. "I look forward to being of help to you if I can."

"Let her go to Gryffindor then," the hat announced.  "It'll be an easier transition.  Without the vampires of course."

"I'd hope not," she said, smiling at it.  "Thank you."  She kissed it on the tip and put it back onto the shelf.  She curtseyed to the headmaster.  "With your leave?"

"Go, dear.  We'll worry about uniforms tomorrow."

"Let me worry about those.  I have a few from the book's merchandise."  She walked off with him.  "I'm like Xander's little sister.  I'm the good one."

"Good.  I had been hoping you weren't the other one."

"No, but I did lay a bad hair curse on her."  Harry gave her an odd look.  "For her, that's a horrible tragedy."  He shuddered. "There are days when she's the slayer and days when she's about my age."  She walked into potions and grabbed her things, letting him have the last bag.  "Here.  Treats I made myself," she said happily.  "Hi, guys.  He'll be back in a few."  She walked out with him again.  "So, I'm here for a year.  What can I do to help you, Harry?"

"You can pretend to be Hermione."

"I'm not quite that smart, but sure.  I'll also nag less and let you goof off more for tests and stuff."  He laughed at that.  "I'm fourteen.  I understand these things."  They ran into a teacher in front of the house's door.  "Madam.  The books described you perfectly."

"Thank you, dear.  Books?"  She pointed at Harry.  "Oh, those," she said bitterly.  She cleared her expression.  "You've been recently found?"

"No, I've recently decided it was time I became proactive about my control issues.  I was raised on the hellmouth.  I leak magic on occasion.  Plus my buddy Xander is over here to get better and he'll need me."

The teacher looked confused.  "Professor Snape's son," Harry explained.  "She's fourteen but they never mentioned a year to me.  Which room?"

"Hmm.  We'll have to see that.  For now, let's put her things into a corner of the common room."  She looked at Dawn.  "You do both?"

"I do and I do it very well but Rosenburg was tutoring me.  I decided I should have more control."

"An excellent idea.  How long do we have you for?"

"A year at this moment."

"That's fine, dear."  They put the things in the corner and set a house elf to watch it then she led them down to her office to see where she placed.  She finally had to smile with her.  "Practiced with the books?"

"Of course. I could get away with it."  She grinned.  "I'm trying very hard to stay good."

"I know.  You'll do fine and I'm sure Mr. Potter will be of help to you."

"The feeling's mutual," Dawn assured her.  "Not like I don't know a bit about what went on there."

"Good point."  She nodded.  "We should warn the defense teacher."  Harry snorted, then coughed to cover it.  "I know, but still."

"Can't I just give him lockjaw?" Dawn asked.

"No, that is an evil influence that you're trying to get away from," Harry said with a small smirk.   She shrugged.  "Well?"

"Put her with the fifth years."  Harry nodded and went to do that.  She smiled and made notes about this new student.  She was very powerful and very good. She radiated goodness.  She would have to learn shielding very soon.  The castle obviously didn't like her at the moment.


Xander looked up, frowning when he felt something coming in.  "Harry's here," he called.

Ron got up to answer the door, frowning at the girl standing there.  "You're not Harry."

"He'll be here in a few hours.  He made the portkey with Professor Snape.  May I pass?"

"No," he snorted.

She took a swing and knocked him out, walking over him waving his hand to make it quit hurting.  "Wrong answer."  She smiled at Draco.  "The books said you looked more pointy.  Huh."  She shrugged and walked into the kitchen, then squealed and hugged Xander. "I'm here to help you."

"I can tell," he squeaked.  "Get off."  She got off, grinning at him.  "Hi, Dawn."

"Hi, Xander."  She hugged him again.  When Draco came in with his wand drawn she pulled it wandlessly over and slapped it onto the table.  "No magic around Xander!  He might absorb more!"  He looked horrified.  "I'm Buffy's little sister, Dawn.  I'm here to help you two.  You're going to need it.  I can anchor the energies around him as they're being worked on and I need the control work anyway."  She smiled at Xander.  "Mommy said I could come over for a year.  Mom also said she and Rupert were going to go after Buffy's ass with a hairbrush tonight."

"We've *got* to scry that," he said fondly, going to do that in the fountain out back.  He giggled, watching Joyce and Rupert yell at her and Willow.  Willow suddenly shifted into a toad.  "Hey, Dawn, come see!" he called.  She came bouncing out and looked, giggling.  "She's afraid of them," he laughed.  "Good job, Rupert!"  He clapped and hooted.

She giggled.  "That's so cute.  Ooh, look at Buffy.  Tara's losing her temper big time!"  They laughed at how Tara started to scream and rant at them.  Willow got turned back and she went off on her too.  "Cool."

Draco looked. "Who's the ranting blonde?"

"Tara.  Willow's girlfriend.  She's a great witch but Willow's been screwing up again."  They were both turned into toads and Tara stormed back into the kitchen.  "Someone's going to have cookies soon."

"Yeah, maybe us," Xander said, grinning at them.  "Draco, this is Dawn.  She's always been there for me."  Ron walked out glaring at her.  "Don't even."

"Fine.  If she apologizes for slugging me."

She shrugged. "Sure, mistook you for a vampire."  He gaped and she smiled.  "Oops?"

He snorted, smirking some.  "Nice try."  He came to look.  "Who're the toads?"

"Buffy and Willow frogs," Dawn said happily.  "Tara finally lost it and went off."  She and Xander high-fived.  The professor came out shaking his head.  "Tara went off."

"Good.  She's always seemed reasonable by what my son has said."  He came over and changed them back, letting the two parental figures get in on it again.  "There, better.  They didn't deserve that long of a rest."  Dawn giggled and hugged him.  "Do release me, Miss Summers."  She let him go and hugged Ron instead.  "Thank you."

Draco looked then at him. "Hufflepuff?"

"Nope," she said dryly.  "Not yours either."

"The hat would never do that to my house," he assured her calmly.

She looked at Snape.  "Do you trust him?"

"Only as far as his interests go."  He considered it.  "You may tell them."

She beamed. "I'm the Key."  Both boys gaped and Draco passed out.

Ron snorted. "Good!  About time!  Now I can taunt him about it like he does me."  He looked at her. "So, you're a Gryff?"  She nodded.  "Year?"

"Fifth.  I'm here to help you two help Xander."

"Sure," he agreed, grinning and walking her off to tell her about some of the people in her new house.

Xander kicked Draco on the side.  "Get up," he complained. "You're getting messy."  He looked at his father.  "Why do I need anchored?"

"The last time this was attempted it was to a normal sorcerer and he had to be anchored using her energy or else he'd have died.  You have more energy stored in you so we're not sure of the outcome."

"Sure," he sighed, nodding.  "Just don't let me know if I'm going to die."

"I wouldn't."

"Thanks."  He touched the water and sent a message through the link to Rupert's ear.  He ran off to get a book and came back, then started screaming anew about possibly having killed him.  He walked off smiling, going to make himself a milkshake.

Snape and Draco watched while he finished his tirade and started on a new tangent.  They were greatly amused by this.  It was a good start to their torture.  "We should let them feel this," Draco said quietly.

"Only generally.  Remember, your father's master may be watching."

"Hmm.  Then how about a full pregnancy a day?" he suggested.  "Each and every day until he delivers.  Emphasizing the area he's in now?"

"Interesting."  He looked at him.  "How would we do that?"  He pulled the spell out of his pocket.  "Been in the library?"

"Of course. I adore libraries."  Snape smirked and read it over then nodded and they cast it, making Dawn cackle from behind them.  She came forward and added her own touch.  "What did you do?" he asked her.

"Screwed with their periods."  She smirked and skipped off with Ron again.  She stole a few slurps of his milkshake.  "I screwed with their cycles and they'll get to feel a full pregnancy every single day while you're stuffed up."  She kissed him on the forehead.  "Right now, we've got to move some of the bad energy around, dear.  It's not in your head at least."  He shrugged.  "Sure.  You sip, we'll work on it in a while."  He nodded and drank more, letting her cuddle him.


Xander woke up groggy and limp.  He did not want to move.  No matter how much someone knocked.  "Go away!"

"Not happening," Draco called, walking in with a tray.  He brought it over.  "Eat.  Even that ungodly coffee there for you."  He took the capturing crystals and tossed them into the hall, making Xander perk up some.  "I'd say that's too many of them around you at the moment."  He sat Xander up and put a pillow behind him. "Eat.  The nurse is coming today."  Xander groaned but did eat.  "Thank you."  He opened the windows and shivered.  "Sorry, bit chilly."  He closed it and went to open one out of the way so no huge breeze would chill his patient. "There, better.  Some fresh air."

"Think I could sneak out today?"

Draco looked at him.  "If there's nothing wrong, I don't see what harm a walk in the garden would do.  As for Diagon, we'll have to see."  Xander pouted.  "Don't.  It's not my call.  What would you need anyway?"

"Books?  Something to *do* all day?"

Draco shrugged.  "There's always more studying."


"Just think, we go for seven years and live at the school."  Xander shuddered and shrunk down some.  "I know.  Eat."  Xander dug in and ate.  "Thank you.  Much better."  He walked out, going to meet the nurse.  "He's in bed but eating.  He was being overly drained by the crystals."

"That's fine."  She followed him back up there, smiling at her patient.  "Well, let's see how you're doing."

"Can I go to Diagon or even London if I'm good?"

"We'd have to see."  She checked him over and nodded. "I see the anti-nausea potion is working?"

"Very well," Xander assured her.  "It makes me pee but I'm fine."

"Good."  She ran another check.  "She's doing just fine, Xander.  Now, if you *must* go out...."

"I'm going to go insane."

"I understand.  You can go to muggle London.  It's probably safer.  But the first sign of pain, cramping, or anything else, you must come right back."  He nodded.  "What were you planning on?"

"Going to a movie if I can get some muggle money changed over."

"Any bank should be able to do that," Draco noted.  Xander nodded and finished up then got up and headed for the bathroom.  "He's been a bit bored and he doesn't like to do too many spells in a day."

"That's probably reasonable."  She patted him on the cheek.  "Now, let's have your notes?"  He handed them over, making her nod and check her mental list.  "This one's odd.  Do we know why?" she asked, pointing at one.

"He said he's always got a craving for chocolate.  He said that's normal for him."

"That's good then.  At least some things are remaining the same."  Xander came out dressed.  "That's a good outfit.  Comfortable?"  He nodded.  "Good.  Remember to stay with the boys."  Draco gave her an odd look. "It will do you good, Mr. Malfoy," she said firmly.

"Can't he take Weasley?"

"He's taking you both.  Just in case."  Draco sighed and went to get ready.  "Remember, you're going around muggles, no uniforms, no robes, and hide your wand."

Ron popped over.  "We are?"  Xander beamed and nodded. "Sure.  We have to stop anywhere first?"

"I need to hit the bank to get some money changed over.  I've got about a hundred dollars american in my wallet."   He found it and opened it.  "Well, I did.  Stupid bitch ex," he muttered.  He picked up his cellphone and dialed the bank, using his ATM card to check his balance.  "She cleaned out my bank accounts.  What a shock," he said dryly.  He called the Magic Box. "Rupert, is my ex there?  Because she cleaned out my bank accounts, Rupert.  Yes, I do rather need them.  Well, gee, I don't know.  Baby clothes?"  He smirked.  "I thought that might be necessary, yes.  No, I'm not coming back.   Gee, she can pay me back for all that and every other penny she's taken from me since the day I met her.  Which means she owes me about three grand at the moment.  And I want it now.  No, I'm not being unreasonable.  She's demonic.  She shouldn't have touched it."  He hung up and counted.  A small stack appeared beside him.   He felt the magic on it and snorted.  "Not going to work.  I'm not falling for fake money."  It disappeared.  "If you don't, I'm going to press charges in demonic court!"  A small bag fell at his feet and he opened it, taking out a familiar bracelet.  He smirked and put it on his wrist then took out the money, counting it.  "Thanks, D'Hoffryn.  Have her, please.  Not like I want her.  Make her a succubus or something so she can pay you back."  He put it into his pocket and looked at Ron, smiling happily.  "She fucked with the wrong person."


"My ex, Anyanka."  The nurse gasped.  He nodded. "Yeah, I have bad taste in the women around me except for Dawn."  He walked over to Draco's room.  "Aren't you done primping?"

"No," he said blandly.  "I'm not."  He looked in his closet.  "What do muggles wear?"

Ron sighed and came in, handing over an outfit that was put together.  "That without the robe, Draco."  He went back to walk Xander down the stairs.  "Did you eat?"

"Yes I did."

"Good.  What about the bracelet?  Shouldn't we get rid of it?"

"I'm debating that and it won't make me demonic or bleed into the little fish in there."  Ron looked confused.  "There's a sac of water around them," he explained.  "The baby's swimming in it."

"Oh.  So fish.  Got it now."  He beamed and they headed off once Draco joined them.  "Got your wand?"

"Of course," Draco assured him.  "Portkey?"

"Whatever," Xander said.  They nodded and headed off by portkey, going to muggle London.  He needed to have some fun.  He got to the bank and found the roll slightly diminished, looking up.  "Fine, whatever."  He handed it over.  "I'm on vacation."  She smiled and counted it out for him then handed him a slip to sign.  He did and she handed back British Pounds.  "Thank you."  He stuffed it into his pocket and walked out with his bodyguards, going to do something *fun*.  Maybe even a movie!


Draco came back shaking his head.  "What was that again?"

"A movie," Ron told him.  "My father said the Ministry shows one now and then that relates to us so they know how the muggles are thinking about magic at that time."

"Oh.  Charming."  He sat down and shuddered.  "Why was there something coming out of his stomach in that one?"

"Because that was a horror movie about aliens," Xander said dryly.  "Did you like the other one?"

"I clearly should've been born an elf," Draco noted dryly.  Xander giggled so hard he fell down.  "Exactly.  After all, I am perfect in every way."  He helped Xander up.  "Go up to bed, I'll get the books."  He headed that way for a nap.  Draco took the books out of the bag, gathering his.  Xander had said the book was more involved than the movie so he'd read it and give it a try.  Ron had some of his own.  They waited a half-hour, then checked the house and Xander before retreating to their rooms.  They found trays in there waiting on them, smiling at the house elves' thoughtful gesture.  Not that they hadn't pigged out an hour ago but they were teenagers.


Xander looked up when his father finally came home for the holidays.  "Are they going to get to go home?  Ron's mother's been sending nagging owls."

"As long as we charm them so they can't speak on any of this, they may both be sent home for the holidays," he agreed.

"Guys, he said he can charm you to not talk about this so Ron's mother won't nag more," he yelled.  Ron whooped and ran down the stairs, standing at attention in front of his professor.

"If I must," he said dryly, pulling out his wand to cast it on him.  Ron smiled and hugged Xander then went to pack.

Draco came in, giving him an odd look.  "Are we sure that's wise?"

"Voldemort would come for you, not Ron," Xander reminded him.  "He'd have more access to you."

"True."  He considered it then nodded.  "Ward it well, Professor, though I may come back sooner if I'm bored again this year."  Snape smirked and did the charms on him, getting a nod.  "Thank you."  He walked off, going to pack a smaller bag. "You'll be back in a few weeks, Weasel.  You don't have to pack everything."

"I'm checking my books," he complained.  He came out with a bag and his school bag.  "Mum will wonder if I don't have any homework over the hols."

"My parents don't care if I do or not."  He shrugged and found his cloak putting it on and heading down to the front door.  "Floo or portkey?" he asked the professor.  It was only polite.

"Apparate, Draco. I know you know how."  Draco let out an evil smirk and winked at Xander before disappearing.

Ron snorted.  "He's much too noisy.  Be back in two weeks, Xander.  Behave and call over the floo if you need us.  Or call Dawn and have her call us."  He popped off, much more quietly than Draco had done.

"Stealth apparation now?" Snape demanded.  "What are those twits doing!"

"Planning on how to win a war, dad.  It's not like they can overpower him with a frontal assault."  He got comfortable again, then looked at the bulge, then his father.  "By the way, it is a girl.  Draco did the test."

Snape did the test himself then nodded.  "That's fine.  Daughters are highly appreciated as well, my son.  Have you eaten?"

Xander burped.  "About a half hour ago.  Get dinner, dad, come talk to me.  Tell me how Dawn's really doing."

He sat down after taking off his outer robes.  "Bring me dinner."  The house elves brought in a tray with dinner for him.  "Thank you."  They got his son a new glass of milk then ran off again. He smiled.  "They do like to spoil you."

"One of them was helping me stand from the table last night and got kicked in the ear for it too," Xander said dryly, sipping his milk.  "So, how is Dawnie?"

"Doing reasonably well.  It's clear she's read over the books and not a lot else. She's doing well in her reason for being there and the control is being found.  On both sides because she has made me watch her doing wandless magic to strengthen the school's protections."  Xander nodded at that. "We're waiting to see if it warps her or not."

"Probably not."  He finished his milk and put it aside.  "Two whole weeks?"

"Two whole weeks," he agreed, eating another bite.  "How are your studies going?"

"Unreasonably boring?"

"That's not a good answer, son."

"I understand the necessity, but it's boring, Dad.  Magic isn't my thing."

"Yes, but you'll still need some to coral that daughter of yours. Otherwise she'll start to leak magic and then things will start happening that you can't control."

"I know but it makes me feel lazy to do things magically."

"Then don't.  I don't."  He looked at his son. "I use my wand perhaps ten times a day, son, and that's mostly in classes for convenience's sake.  No one says you have to use it for every little thing, nor that you should."

"I guess that's a point," he said quietly.  "Both of them use theirs like they don't have hands."

"That's because they're teenagers.  Mr. Weasley is doing it because he can't at home and Draco has never known any better.  His parents are the same way."

Xander nodded.  "He said his father showed up here recently.  Had me hide while Ron sent him away with a house elf."

"Interesting.  Why was I not informed?"

"Ron said he handled it and Draco said it wasn't important.  He's shown up twice now.  I felt him pop in just a minute ago."  He got up and headed up the stairs at a quick jog.

Professor Snape finished his meal in leisure, then got up to answer the door when it was pounded on by a cane handle.  "What, Lucius?"

"My son was here?"

"Your son was not here and he may not speak about what he is helping with.  I did the charms myself."

"I noticed," he said, brushing past him to get inside.  The door stayed open.  "I'm not leaving until I get answers for *everyone*, Severus."

"Then you're a fool and you can stand in the hallway for all I care," he noted, heading for his study.  He very bluntly closed the door in his former friend's face.  Then he smiled and evil smile and sat down behind his desk to look over the notes that Draco had left him.  Here he had mentioned his father's interest.

"Severus, this is most impolite," Lucius complained.

"Go away then.  You have no need of knowing."

"He's my son.  I can have him pulled from this project."

Snape got up and looked at him.  "I sincerely doubt that, Lucius.  He's an adult by Ministry standards.  He entered into the contract of his own free will.  He knew the stipulations when he did so.   Be thankful he was released for the holidays.  By the way, you cannot make him break that charm.  He cannot.  I did it myself."

"This has to do with that *son* of yours, doesn't it?" he sneered.

"No, though he is back home for the holidays.  He's shielding himself from this visit but he  is home for a few days."

"The Dark Lord wanted him."

"The Dark Lord can take a flying fuck," Xander said from the stairs, leaning on the railing.  That hid the small bump with the thick and bulky sweater he had put on.  "I'm not his to order around, nor will I be."  Lucius glared at him.   "Not will he be allowed here while I'm here."

"You are a mere squib," he sneered.

"Really?"  He pointed his hand at him and muttered something, making Lucius shriek as small chunks of skin were bitten out of his body.  "Leave, Malfoy," he sneered.  "Your kind are not wanted her."

"Your father is my kind," he sneered.

"Really?  I could've sworn he was smarter than you.  He would know where he's not wanted."  Lucius stomped of.  Xander looked at his father.  "That's a problem."

"It is.  I've got the other site already set up."

"Thank you.  We should have a snack to celebrate the lack of drama."  Snape smiled.  "Cheese?"

"Is a good snack for you.  I'll have seconds of dinner."  Xander smiled and went to get himself some cheese and crackers so he could nibble with his father.   It was a better night after that.


Xander paced back and forth in the entryway.

"I'm sure he's fine," Ron promised.  "He's a slippery little bastard, Xander.  Not even his father could keep him."

"He should've been back yesterday, like you were," Xander said, starting to worry for real now.  "Lucius tried again right after the holiday.  I'm sure he went after Draco instead."  He turned and found him behind him.  "Are you all right?"

"No, but I've healed," he admitted.  "Missed me?"


"No, unfortunately I look too much like him to be a bastard," he said, giving him a look.  "You're right, he did try.  Often. He didn't succeed.  He also tried to drag me to have me Dark Mark'd.  Didn't work either.  Voldemort was not amused.  Said I was more useful without it."  He leaned against the wall.  "He tried to interrogate me and ran into the spells as well.  He and your father got into it."  Xander stiffened.  "Your father said he was ordered to do so and he had his own in place.  He has no idea what's going on."  Xander relaxed and nodded.  "Now, you worrying is not healthy for you.  We're going to check each other for eavesdropping and other spells to make sure neither set of parents decided it was a good idea to keep a closer eye on us.  You're going to go sit down then we're going to go back over some more defensive spells."  Xander slumped but nodded and went to do that.  He looked at Ron.  "It's in your hair."

"She said it was to make sure I was all right."  He reached up there to play with the small braid his mother had put in.  He undid it, breaking the charm.  He let Draco check him, then stood up and checked him over, finding a few different versions of the same thing and one other thing he wasn't sure about.  "Feel this."  He pointed at it and Draco tried, frowning. "Can't?"  Draco shook his head.  "Go wait in the study while I call someone."  Draco went to do that, away from any sort of notes.  Ron used the floo to call the school. "Professor, Draco's back and he's got spells I can't identify on him," he said quietly.

Snape's head considered it.  "Your brother, is he up?"

"Up, bored, restless, about to find a girl and shag her," he admitted.

"More than I ever needed to know.  Send Draco to him."

"Agreed."  He nodded behind him.

"He'll be fine.  Put the shields up to maximum."

Ron nodded and signed off, calling his brother.  "Bill Weasley."  His brother's head popped up.  "You know I'm on a special project.  One of the other kids came back with spells I can't identify and I'm not sure they're not to spy on us.  Where can we meet you?"

"Mum's at the store," he offered, nodding politely at Xander.  "Him?"

"No, we're working with him as well.  Ignore him.  You never saw him," he said seriously.  Bill lost his smile.  "Seriously."

"What's going on?"

"I can't, Bill.  When it's done."

Xander looked at him, then at Ron.  "Give us ten to see if you can know.  Ron's told me about you and I can see a strategic reason for it.  Ron looked at him.  "Dawn," he said simply.  "She's inexperienced," he pointed out when Ron looked confused.

"Point.  That would be his sort of thing.  I'll check with the professor.  Bill, somewhere not home?  It's not exactly a bloke I wanna show my room."

"Sure.  Um, somewhere....  Remember the old tree?"  Ron nodded.  "Bring him there.  And an explanation if you can."

"Agreed."  He hung up and called the professor back.  "Xan wants to tell Bill.  Said it might be helpful to her highness, the prancing one."

Snape cracked a smirk at that description.  He had called Dawn a prancing princess on more than one occasion.  "I will think on that."

"Dawn's inexperienced," Xander pointed out.  "His job would be in line with what's going on."

Snape considered it.  "It would also give us another protector if we had to.  Agreed, Mr. Weasley.  You may."  He hung up and went back to his classroom.

Ron grinned.  "Let me up the shields."

"I've got it.  Go."  Ron nodded, going to take Draco off to their old goofing off spot.  Xander went in to nudge up the shields and it was nice, it felt safe.  He felt warm and confined again.  He was still going to go insane.... maybe Bill would help with that issue too.  He was older, he had to know fun things to do when you were in quarantine.


Draco looked up when he heard footsteps, nodding at the man to come closer.  "Ron's on his way.  He had to go get something he forgot from his room."

"Malfoy.  Not the one I expected."

Draco shrugged.  "The project has need of skills I possess."  Bill nodded.  "We'll need to erect a shield here as well.  Just in case of scrying."


"This deals with wandless magic as well."

Ron popped back.  "Sorry, forgot my favorite shirt."  He set up the shields and his brother gave him a horrified look.  "What?  Reflecting instead?  I thought I fixed that problem."

"Those are...  They're impenetrable, Ron!  Why?"

"Easy. We're working with...  Fix him first, okay?"

"I wanna know."

"We got you cleared," Draco assured him.  "Xander talked him into it.  Just please.  He found one he can't identify."  Bill sighed and found it when Ron pointed at it, unraveling all the spells around Draco and then his baby brother, including the protective ones and the ones where they couldn't speak on things. Draco relaxed.  "We're helping Professor Snape's son.  He's from Sunnydale."

"The hellmouth!" he shrieked.

Ron nodded.  "Much worse than that.  He's friends with a slayer and a witch named Rosenburg.  Together they decided he should be bound to them.  They did it by making him spawn.  Personally."  Bill sat down, staring at him.  "I passed out.  He's about four and a half?" he asked Draco.

"Just over the start of the fifth month," Draco offered, hauling the other Weasley up.  "Due to where he grew up and hunting with the slayer and things, plus knowing Rosenburg, he's soaked up enough dark magic that my father and his boss are wet from it.  We're doing that and not unraveling the other spell."

Bill swallowed.  "You'd need a piece of The Key, this inter-dimensional spell.  It was lost a few years ago."

"She's in the fifth year of Gryff," Ron said blandly.  "They sent her to the same slayer bitch."

Bill blinked.  "You're joshing me," he said finally.  They both shook their heads.  "Prove it."

"Come on then, but remove Mum's spell from yourself too," Ron ordered.  Bill did that and they headed back together, leaving up the shield in case they needed it.  He walked Bill inside.  "Xander, we brought Bill back," he called.

"Please let him have something to do?  I'm going insane!" he called from the study.  He came out with Dawn.  "She came too."

"Dawn," Draco said respectfully.  She smirked and pinched him on the cheek.  "Don't do that, woman!" he complained, brushing her off.  "Thanks to women like his friends, I'll never touch another one again."  She giggled and hugged him then Ron.  She stopped in front of Bill.  "This is Dawn Summers."

"I can tell who she is," Bill admitted, nodding politely.  "Bill Weasley, ma'am."

"I'm fourteen.  Treat me like it," she ordered firmly.  "Before I tell Xander to kick your ass."  He smiled at that.  "Now, let's see what you can do to help me.  Xander.  Front and center, Mr.-I-don't-share-my-ice-cream."   He walked closer rolling his eyes.

Bill laid a hand on his stomach, turning pale and swallowing, then on his face as he looked into his eyes.  "Mate, they fucked you greatly," he said finally.  "We can fix that."  Xander cracked a smile.  "Plus I can get you some nudie magazines too.  Best cure for boredom known to mankind and Mum always got needy around the second trimester too."

"Thank you," he said, hugging him.

"Shh, we'll handle it."  He patted him on the back and looked at his brother.  "Good thing she couldn't get it out of you.  Can you *imagine* the fit Mum would've thrown?"  Ron nodded.  "I'm surprised you came home for the holiday."

"She kept nagging," Xander said, pulling back.  "What now?"

"Now?  Now we do some things.  Capturing crystals aren't doing it.  We can start to warp all the energy onto the babe for now.  That'll make her hellishly powerful when she's born but it'll be easier to remove it from her.  You'll be in less danger and she'll not be in as much.  We've had to do that to women in my field and others who've been cursed."  Xander nodded. "It's going to feel like a straw sucking at you now and then."

"As long as it doesn't hurt her."

"It shouldn't," Bill promised.  "Can't say as I've had to do more than learn it but it shouldn't."  Xander nodded.   He looked at his brother then at Draco.  "I'm taking you as the on-site potions person and that stuff?"  He nodded. "Good, we'll do it together.  Where are we working?  We'll probably want to set up somewhere he isn't sleeping if we haven't yet."

"I do most of it on the couch," Draco offered, waving a hand.  "Shall we?  Get ready to bring us tea when we're done," he ordered the nearest house elf.  "Weasel, do the shields."  He walked off.

Bill looked at him.  "Play nicely."  Draco rolled his eyes.

"It's fine, Bill.  He's a ferret and we all know that."   He smiled at Dawn.  "Help me?"

"Gladly so."  She went to help him boost the shields for a few minutes.

Bill looked at Xander.  "Did you at least hit the bints?"

"Told them I'd rather join the side of evil than go home."

"I'd have slugged 'em," Bill said honestly.

"I'd have killed them after prolonged torture," Draco agreed.  Bill smirked at him.  "I would have.  I would've taken great joy in their screams.  Instead, at the moment, Dawn's screwed with their cycles and they're going through a full pregnancy a day until this is all done."

Bill smirked.  "That's mean but I like that."  He got to work setting up the shunts and channels for the excess energy.  Then he molded a capturing crystal into a necklace. "For anything that'll be too strong for her, like if you get sudden surges.  That's to protect her."  Xander nodded, letting him put it around his neck.  "Take the others outta the house, Malfoy."

"As soon as we're done."

"Good enough."  They watched as Xander was drained some, then Bill shielded the necklace and moved the power into the baby instead.  He unshielded the necklace and let it happen.  "There, that's better."  Draco did the checking spell and made notes, then went to summon all the capturing crystals into the work area since it was shielded.  They'd have to be drained safely before they could be removed from the house since it was such dark and chaotic magic.  Bill looked at Xander.  "You're damn lucky, mate.  The last guy, they did the spell too fast and he nearly died from the babe draining him."  Xander nodded, he had read that.  "You'll be fine.  It's at the right rate and everything."

"Day and a half per day."

"That's still okay.  Now, how about practicing magic?"

"I'm learning," he admitted.  "I didn't feel comfortable learning it before."

"Understood.  There's some handy things to learn and I'll send 'em to you.  I take you as more of a hand's-on sort than not."  Xander nodded, looking eager.  "There's better ways than the school.   Drop 'em back to normal, Ron."  The shields fell some and he heard a pop, looking back at the proud grandfather. "He'll be fine.  It's not too fast on his system or too draining so far. We've moved it into the child and I've set up a surge protector in the necklace if he needs it."


Dawn walked in.  Then she giggled.  "You'd think the disguise spell would be so much stronger."  She pulled her wand.  "Eviscera Engorgio!"  Lucius' disguise spell fell as he screamed and grabbed his stomach to try to stop the swelling before they burst.  "Huh, worked better than I thought," she admitted, then she smiled and kicked him in the nuts.  "Bastard."

"Dawn, love, keep that up and I might have to marry you for being nearly as evil as I am," Draco said as he came back.  He smiled at the professor when he showed up.  He pointed at his father.  "He was pretending to be you."

"Interesting."  He looked at Dawn.  "Remind me to give you five points when we get back, Miss Summers."

"Sure, Prof.  I'd like that.  It'll make up for the ninety-five I lost last class."

He smirked.  "Next time, don't chatter."

"I'm talkative.  Geez, man, I'm a teenager!"  She laid another spell on him, making him shriek and howl.  "Pity," she said, giving him a look.  "You don't fuck with what's mine, Mister Gay Hair."

Draco laughed and kissed her on the cheek.  "You're more than evil enough to be a Slytherin," he said proudly.  He pulled his wand.  "Can we obliviate him now?"

"I have something better."  He went into his lab and found the locked cabinet untouched.  He pulled out the small bottle and walked it out.  "Pinch his nose shut.  He's got to drink it."  Bill did that and Lucius had to pant through his mouth.  He forced the water down his throat, making him choke and splutter, but the man's face went slack.  Ron removed the spells for a minute then Snape set the spell on the Lethe water.  He sent him to the school once Dawn's spells were put back by Draco, making his professor smile at him.  "Good job, Mr. Malfoy."

"Her idea originally.  I'm having fun."  He smirked at Bill.  "Well, how do you like our secret project?"

"You guys scare me," he admitted, but he was smiling.  "Especially that one," he said, nodding at Dawn.  "But in this case whatever works and I'm happy enough with helping where I can, Professor.  I'm at Mum's for the next month."

"Take time off if you must.  We'll need you here for the birth," Draco reminded him.

"Point.  Shouldn't be a problem and Mum will be ecstatic since Charley's been put on leave too."  He looked at his former professor. "Put the non-disclosure spells on me as well.  If she hears it'll be so loud you won't need the Prophet."

"We still need to teach him how to handle baby stuff," Ron reminded everyone.

"I changed your nappies, I can teach him how to change one," Bill assured him.  Ron shrugged, that was his last objection.  Snape laid the spells and he nodded at Dawn.  "Yell for me at home, people.  I'll be back in a week to check on him."  He disapparated from there.

Ron looked at him.  "We lowered the shields and he apparated in looking like you, Professor."

"I should've realized he'd try something like this," Xander moaned, sitting up.  "I can still feel the other crystals."

"I'll drain them tonight," Draco promised.  Xander nodded.  "Come on, up to bed with you.  Dawn?"

"Wingardium Leviosa," she cast, floating her buddy up the stairs and following to tuck him in.

Ron looked at him.  "If you do marry her, those'll be some scary rugrats when you spawn, Malfoy."  He smirked.  "Better you than me to have the next Potter, mate."  He walked off, heading to his room to make his own notes.

Draco shuddered.  "Please make that go away?"

Snape hexed him then smiled when Draco finally got free.  "Better?"

"Much.  I'll repay that at a later date."  He went to make his own notes then get to work on the draining.

Snape sat down, shaking his head.  This was becoming insane.


Xander walked into the kitchen later that night, going into the fridge.  One of the house elves looked at him.  "I can make a sandwich.  Go back to sleep."  She nodded and did that while he made his own snack.  He wasn't that helpless.  Draco came down and he held up the bread, getting a shrug.  He handed over what he was using and Draco only took half of it.  "Sorry, craving."

"It happens to the best of us, Xander."  He sat down across from him.  "Now, we've got to go through your things that recently got sent.  That way we can drain them of anything harmful."

"Sure.  I didn't think I had that much stuff," he admitted.

"We'll see what they sent," he promised with a smile.  "At least they're inside and shielded at the moment."  Xander smiled and ate some more of his peanut butter and banana fluff sandwich.  "Any other odd cravings?"

"I'm horny but all the nurse's books said to expect that."

"Well, if you need to toss off, I don't care," Draco assured him.  "Call Weasley's name once, make him blush."

Xander smirked.  "You're being mean again."

"I am and I enjoy it immensely," he said smugly, finishing his sandwich.  He stood up and got them some milk, then headed back to his room.  "Sleep sometime soon, Xander."

"Yes, mother."  He finished his sandwich and went to wander in the garden for a few minutes.  It was nice to be able to go out at night for a change.  He ran into a body out there, looking at him.  "Giles."

"Xander."  He looked at him.  "Are you well?"

"Well enough.  A bit freaked out.  About what I'd expect.  I'm coming to accept it."

"That's fine."  He gave him a gentle hug then smiled and patted down his hair.  "I got the most outraged call from Ethan.  Something about bindings?"

"I had him do some so I couldn't leak more accidental magic."  He showed him his wrists.  "I had to release them so they could drain the dark magic from me.  Apparently I've been sucking it up for a few years at least."

"You had that problem when I got there, Xander.  You were born there and attuned to it," he said gently.  Xander sighed but nodded.  "It'll be fine.  As you drain the bad, the good will fill you."  He smiled and brushed his hair around again.  "Joyce sends her love and packed some brownies in your boxes for you."

"I'll get 'em out tomorrow.  Draco wants to drain the bad magic from my clothes too."

"Might be a good idea," he agreed patiently.  "The hellmouth's miasma tends to stick to everything around you."  He patted him on the shoulder again.  "Should you need anything, feel free to call upon me, young man.  Also, I should warn you that Ethan's in London again.  He said for you to call on him if you needed to.  I did warn him Dawn was over here guarding you."  He looked back at the house, seeing the redhead lounging in the doorway.  "One of your other guards?"

Xander looked then nodded Ron out.  "Ron Weasley, this is Rupert Giles, the Slayer's Watcher in Sunnydale."

"Hi," he said, shaking his hand.  "You weren't involved?"

"No, and we did beat them grandly for it," he assured him with a smile.  That got a grin.  "I came to check on him and let him know that Ethan's in London if he needs something from a chaos sorcerer.  I have told him and he's set up an alternative punishment for Miss Rosenburg because of how dreadful she abused the natural energy of the world."  He looked at Xander again.  "If you should need it, use my house, Xander."

Xander nodded, taking the keys and address.  "Thank you, Giles.  So, did she take the hint and go after the bad guys over here?"

"Oh, she has.  Ethan couldn't block that one, it's too beneficial to him and others."  He smiled gently.  "Do be well and behave, young man.  Have Dawn call me soon."

"I will."  He gave him a hug and smiled as Giles disappeared.  "Technically, that was Ethan.  He and Giles had a thing when they were younger.  I'm sure it was a verbatim blessing as well."  He looked at the address then the keys.  "Totally muggle and the snake twat won't know about it," he decided, heading back into the house.  "You felt him?"

"A surge of unusual magic," he admitted.  "He punished Rosenburg too?"

"Yuppers.  Probably made them both miserable.  He's the reason I have memories from a soldier and at one point in time he turned Giles mentally into a teenager for a few hours.  Chaos is fun, it's a personal motto."  That got a snicker and Ron put him back into his room then went to check the house before going to bed.  Draco leaned in and he handed over the keys and address.  "Giles' house over here.  Totally muggle but he's a Watcher."

"Excellent.  Who delivered them?"

"Ethan Rayne."  Draco blinked at that.  "He and Giles had a thing when they were younger.  Apparently he's punishing Willow and Buffy too."  He smirked.  "I'm sure whatever he's doing is a lot of fun for Janus."

"Probably," he decided, memorizing the address.  "Keep the keys, just in case."  He smiled and went back to his room, thinking on that.  The boy knew some powerful people of his own.  Especially if he could tell when one wasn't himself.  In this case he hoped they would help the poor man instead of taking some fun with him but you never knew with chaos people.


Xander looked over as Bill Weasley came back for his weekly bout of draining, waving a hand.  "Let me finish this chapter."

"Sure."  He sat down, looking him over.  "She's a bit active today."

"She's being a pain," Xander said dryly.  "She doesn't like Draco so she's acting up so he'll go running off with messy hair from stress."  He put down his book and looked at him.  "What this time?"

"The usual," he offered, coming over to ghost a hand over Xander's stomach.  It was firm.  She was kicking up a storm.  "Hey," he said gently, stroking over her back.  "Calm down in there.  Your Da needs some rest, poppet."  He got her calmed down and went to work on Xander's energy problems.  He smiled as the boy filled to an equal level of bad and good energy.  It was the furthest they'd come in quite a while.  "Fully even, Xander."

"Good!  That's probably why I feel so sick."

He nodded. "It's like you're polluted and when you get out of it, it'll bother your body because it's used to it," he agreed.  "We get that when we work long term down in tombs."  He patted her again, smiling at him.  "She's fine too."  She kicked him then settled down again. "See?"

"Unfortunately, only stars."  He glared at his stomach then at him.  "How is she getting out?"

"Not a clue, mate."


"I'll ask the old woman at the school if you want."

"Please.  I asked Dad and he got this panicked, sickened look then shuddered and disappeared before I could ask for him to get me more books."

"I can do that too."  He ruffled his hair. "There you go, all done for the next few days."

"Thanks, Bill."

"Welcome, Xander."  Ron peeked in. "I'm done."

"Good.  That's easier.  He nearly there?"

"Halfway.  Feels like crap."

"Of course he does," Ron agreed, nodding at that.  He came in and looked at Xander, then at Bill.  "We need anything special?"

"Someone needs to start prepping for the birth stuff."

"We can do that as well," Ron assured him with a small grin.  "Draco said he was done with the capturing crystals just now."

"I'll go look them over, make sure they're fully drained."  He headed out, going to find Draco in the potions lab.

Ron looked at Xander, grinning at him.  "So, are you going to give us more trouble?" he asked.  Xander opened his mouth and he charmed him.  "Not a word, boy."   He glanced around then took Xander with him, knocking him out during the transport.  He turned back into Lucius a few minutes after landing, smiling at his master.  "You wanted this nauseous excuse for a wizard, My Lord?"

"I did.  Him and my new heir."  Voldemort came closer.  "Hmm, how far along are we, boy?"  He laid a hand on his stomach, soaking up the energy.  "Very powerful.  They've transferred some of the taint into her."  He smiled at Lucius.  "Very good work."

"Thank you, My Lord.  Shall I have a room prepared for him?  After all, he's got my son being his midwife so they've got to think he's fragile.  He was brewing at least six different potions to help him."

"Yes, do so. Our heir cannot be too pampered at this stage.  Do make sure he cannot hurt himself or her."

"Of course."  He went to have a room prepared, including bindings on the bed so the boy couldn't get away.

Voldemort looked at the unconscious boy.  "You'll be just fine, boy.  Once she's mine you'll be a loving sacrifice to aid her on her journey to greatness."  He stroked over his head.  "Hmm, a bit powerful yourself I see."  He walked off smirking.  That would be a delicious holiday present for himself.  An heir he could raise and taint to follow his will and a powerful sacrifice of dark power.


Draco walked out of the potions lab, frowning at the house elf.  "I haven't heard the git recently.  Where's Weasley?"

"Hims take Master Xander off," the house elf told him.


"Not know," the house elf admitted, looking down.  "It was right after the bigger Weasey left, Master Draco sir."

Draco considered it then went to Ron's room to look around.  His robes were all there but one.  Nothing was missing.  He spotted something on the floor and picked it up, looking at the wand.  "He's too poor to have a second one and not that skilled," he said, staring at it.  "Prior incantantum."  The list of what had been cast was given out.  "Fuck."  He hurried down the stairs, calling Snape.  "Weasley's been missing.  His wand last cast a light charm three days ago.  Your son's not here either that I can tell."  Snape gave him a horrified look.  "I swear I saw Weasley today."

"It was probably an illusion or polyjuice," he admitted. "I'll be right there."  Draco nodded and cut the connection.  Snape took a deep breath then got up, heading up to Gryffindor territory.  He found Weasley's sister arguing with a young man.  "Ten points from Gryffindor for such appalling displays in public, Miss Weasley.  Now, where is Miss Summers and Mr. Potter?" he sneered.

"They left earlier this morning to rescue my idiot brother," she told him.

"They did not think to ask me?"

"No, they didn't, sir.  Dawn said there wasn't time.  Something about something she had on Xander going off like a blue light special."  She shrugged.  "Have no idea what she meant."

"Very well."  He stomped off, going to find Professor McGonagall.  "You have two missing students who're involved with a project for my son's health?"

"I do?"

"Apparently so.  Mr.  Potter and Miss Summers are both missing."

"Bloody hell," she muttered.  "Fine.  Where, can we track them?"  She stared at him. "What's wrong with your son anyway?"

He looked at her.  "Miss Rosenburg."  He walked off, going to call the older Weasley involved. "That wasn't your brother."  The food Bill had been chewing spluttered out onto his office floor. "Thank you for messing up my carpet."

"What do you mean that wasn't Ron?"

"That wasn't your brother," he repeated.  "Whoever it was took off with my son."

"Fuck," he said bluntly, then disappeared, heading to the house at a dead apparation and then a run.  "Draco!"  He opened the study door.  "Any idea?"  Draco shook his head.  "Okay.  Let's try tracking him."

"I did.  He's shielded.  I can't reach Dawn either."

"That probably means she's going after him," he admitted. "She's good at that."

"Then we might have to rescue her.  I'm not the heroic sort."

Weasley nodded once.  "That happens to the best of us, Draco.  Sometimes you've got to.  Unless you want to see your father taking their powers to take over the world after he destroys his boss?"

"Not particularly.  I'd never get to have any fun ever again."  The light in ball on the table went off.  "He's out of shielding range.  Dawn's still inside." He frowned.  "What is going on?"

"We'll figure it out."


Xander woke up and looked at the dark, gloomy room he found himself in.  "Well, hellmouths.  It's worse than Dad's."  He looked at the bindings on his wrists, then lifted his head to try to look at his feet.  "You're too big, daughter.  Think you can move so I can see my feet?"  He tried to move them and couldn't get very far.  "We do realize that pregnant people have to pee all the time!" he yelled.  "She's on my damn bladder, people!"  No one came. "Huh."  He looked at the shackle on his wrist.   "Interesting.  He looked at the other one.  The same thing.  He muttered something under his breath while he gathered the power he had.  Then he did something he didn't really want to, he apparated to a safe spot.  Where he passed back out.  Still chained but the other ends weren't attached to anything anymore.  "Rug nice," he mumbled as he passed out, one hand on his stomach.


Harry felt someone trying to track him and blocked it again, then looked at her. "You're glowing," he hissed.

"I know.  Damn it, I can't make it stop, it's Willow."  She sent the magic back at her along with a 'bad guys have us' tag.  She stopped Harry from coming out of the secret tunnel, shaking her head.  "People."  He nodded, looking instead, finding someone staring at the doorway.  She prayed really hard that someone check on them.  Preferably Willow.  Then the castle exploded around them.

"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH DAWNIE!" Willow screamed, and another explosion went off.

"Hmm, magically pregnant person scary.  Have to remember that I don't want kids."  Harry snickered and they came out to fight the bad guys, making them run toward Willow.  "Willow, get the demon!" she yelled.  Then she pointed at Voldemort.  "He took Xander!"

She rounded on him, raising a hand and starting to chant.  His wand burst into flames.  His hand burst into flames.  Lucius' hair burst into flames.  He ran around trying to put it out.  "Mr. Gay Hair, what's wrong?" she sneered.  She threw another spell at Voldemort, making him scream and writhe on the floor.  "What's wrong, bitch!  Don't like it when it's done to you!"  She moved closer and started to go off on him again, at least until Giles appeared and knocked her out.

"I do think that the pregnancy curse is a bit strong," he said dryly.  "You caught her in the second trimester part of the day, sorry about that."  Someone pulled a wand on him and he pulled a crossbow.  A shot to the neck stopped the spell being uttered and took out the wizard.  He reloaded calmly and shot another one.

"Don't hit Harry!" Dawn complained.  They joined him and together the house turned into rubble.  "Huh.  I'm good."

Giles looked at her.  "Don't make me tell your mother, Dawn."

"Yes, Giles."

"Thank you.  Now, where might Xander be?"

"He might've been here but I'm not sure where he is now," she admitted, frowning some.  She cast a tracking charm.  "He's nearby."

Giles looked at it then at her.  He smiled.  "He's safe.  I'll let his father know where."  That got a nod.  "Mr. Potter I presume?"  Harry nodded, still grimacing.  "Rupert Giles, Watcher to the Slayer."  He shook his hand with a small smile.  "This is Miss Rosenburg."

"She's one of the reasons Xander's pregnant."

Harry wobbled.  "He's what?"

Dawn nodded.  "Yeah, that's what she did to him and why we're guarding the Xander so heavily.  Her and my idiot sister.  So we cursed them to go through a whole pregnancy in a day," she said cheerfully.  "Apparently we caught her mid-mood swing.  Oops."  She smiled at the people popping in.  "Hi.  They took what belonged to Professor Snape.  Gotta go, talk to you later, Giles."  She hugged him and whispered, getting a look and a wink.  "Really?"

"He's very safe but could use a bit of attention probably.  I'll let the others know.  Tell the blond prat that he's where Ethan told him to go."  He disappeared with Willow.

"I've got to learn the demon teleporty thing," she pouted, taking Harry by apparation back to the school.  "Ah.  All better and I need chocolate.  I should pout."  She walked off, heading to the kitchens.

Harry stared at her back, looking very confused.  "I don't understand her," he told himself.  "I'm not sure if it's because she's a girl or if it's because she's Dawn."  He trudged inside, running into Professors Snape and McGonagall.  "Your son could use some attention. He's where Ethan told him to go.  Mr. Giles said to tell the blond prat that, his words not mine this time."

"I'll tell Draco immediately.  What had happened?"

"Voldemort wanted an heir.  Your son's really pregnant?"  Snape nodded tightly once.  "I'm very sorry for him, sir.  Oh, Rosenburg had a mood swing on the house while we were trying to rescue your son.  Apparently he got himself free before we could."  He walked off.  "Do I not understand Dawn because she's female or because she's her?" he asked his head of house.

McGonagall looked at him.  "She's a most exceptional girl, Harry.  It's probably because of that."

"Oh, good.  I was hoping the others weren't going to turn out like her."  He headed up to his room for a nap.  He could use a nap.  He was tired after that short battle and the sneaking around.  He was sure there was an auror somewhere who was just as confused as he was.  He wished them luck getting a straight answer from Dawn.


Draco popped into the house, taking a deep breath.  "I'm calm," he reminded himself.  "I do not want to beat the bastard to death.  I don't want to tangle with Rosenburg if I did."  He found Xander on the floor and checked him over, then nodded.  "Well, you'll live."  He fed him a potion to help him equalize his energy again then paged Bill Weasley to come there.  While he waited he floated him to a couch and got the shackles undone.  "The dark buttmuncher had him."

"Wonderful."  He came over to look him over. "Might need a small pain potion, Draco, and check the baby?"  Draco did that, nodding as he pulled out two more potions, letting Bill force them down Xander's throat.  "There, that should help.  Go scout the house, find him a bed."  Draco nodded, going to do that while he called Professor Snape.  "It's us.  We've found him.  He's passed out but okay.  Both of them are."

"Thank you.  Professor McGonagall now knows as well."

"She's a tough old girl, she'll handle it well.  What happened to the house where he had been kept?"


"Ah.  She's a bit scary today then."

"Dawn and others enacted a curse so she'd feel a full pregnancy every day until he delivered for doing this.  Where are you?"

"A muggle house."  He stared at him then smiled and let him see a nearby picture.  Snape nodded once. "We'll set up shop here since apparently he thinks it's safe."

"He's in Sunnydale dealing with Rosenburg.  It'll be fine.  Draco?"

"Already here, we've fed your son three potions, and so far everything looks all right."

"I'll be there tonight, once I can sneak out."

"Sure."  Draco walked in.  "You need anything?"

"An assassin for my father?"

"That may not be an issue if they found him there earlier," Bill pointed out.  "Was that your house?"

"McNair's.  Mum would never let them hold meetings like that in her house.  She's scream about the mess and extra people."   He looked at Snape.  "We're here.  We were told it was fine before."  That got a nod and Snape's head disappeared.  "Help me float him upstairs."

"Sure."  Bill came over and they got Xander into a bed, which made him sigh in pleasure and curl up around the ball of baby.  He looked at Draco.  "Drink?"

"Please."  They headed down to the study to see what was stocked.  It was more than enough for tonight, even if Ron was found and brought back.  "Any word on the irritating prat brother of yours?"

"Yeah, they found him in the dungeon.  He's fine."  He took another drink. "Until Mum hears."  He poured another glass.  "There's a library it looks like."  Draco smirked and they went to explore the rest of the house.  The library was larger than Snape's and quite comprehensive.  It was a beautiful thing.  Draco sent one book upstairs to Xander's room then took another to sit down and read.  He had no idea how Rosenburg did anything and if she was that powerful he wanted to know.  At the very least so he could protect himself from it.  Bill sat down with a different book on cursed artifacts found on the Hellmouth.  It was entertaining.


Xander woke up and blinked at the ceiling.  "Hmm.  Stiff and formal."  He sat up.  No chains.  "Hello?" he called quietly.  The baby kicked so he scurried into the bathroom to relieve the pressure, then came out to find Draco carrying in a tray.  "Where are we?"

"The address Ethan gave you."

"Oh, Giles' place."  He nodded then hugged him.  "Thank you."

"You rescued yourself, even though Potter and Dawn were both on their way to help you."  Xander sniffled.  "Do not sob on me.  I don't care if it is your hormones."  Xander laughed and wiped his cheeks.  "Better.  Now, eat and join us in the library.  Bill and I are both here."  Xander nodded, sitting on his bed to dig in.  Draco left him alone so he could do whatever, including bathe.  "He's up.  We should get a house elf to pack our things."

"I can do that," Bill promised, heading back to the other house to snatch one of the fretting house elves and their bags of stuff.  Ron's got sent to the school since that's where he was.  Draco's stuff and the potions stuff he had been working on, plus Xander's two bags and boxes, all got sent to Giles' house.  It was a nice muggle place.  Then he went to call his mother.  "Mum, I'm going to be out of touch but safe for a bit.  I'm taking Ron's place on that special project."  He hung up before she could say anything and headed out without leaving a note.  He found Snape there and tested him.  "Welcome to Mr. Giles' house, Professor.  Malfoy, your crap's here or coming.  Including the potion's stuff."

"I'm setting it up now," he admitted.  "Xander?  Your father's here."  Xander came down the stairs, giving them a sheepish look.

"It's fine, Xander.  He figured it out somehow and took Ron's spot."  Bill clapped him on the back.  "Now, how are you feeling?"

"Achy and I've got a headache."  He hugged his father.  "Are Harry and Dawn all right?  Draco said they were going to rescue me."

"They're fine.  Tired but fine.  Miss Summers mouthed off to the officials who demanded to know who she was.  Mr. Potter wouldn't wake up for them.  He tried to hex one so they left him alone for now."  He looked at his son. "Anything other than achy and a headache?"

"No, not unless something's wrong with her."

"Not at the moment," Draco admitted as he joined them.  "Though I did have a question about the birthing process.  I'm qualified to make many things but not a portal out for the little dear."

Snape nodded.  "I'll get Pomfrey snuck out in the next few days.  You have checked them both?"

"When I first got here.  He apparated without preparation.  He still had the chains on him."

Snape nodded.  "That's understandable then."  He let his son go, earning a pout.  "You'll be fine, son.  Even if they do wonder why Rosenburg destroyed the house you had been held in."

"I'm wondering if Buffy's just as scary on the hormones."  Xander looked up.  "Ethan?  Is Buffy as scary as Willow is?" he called.

Ethan appeared already nodding.  "Indeed.  Though she's a bit more pouty and whiny.  Her mother is not amused and neither is Ripper."  He smiled at him.  "How do you feel?"

"I feel like crap.  I can't see my feet.  I realized I couldn't see the chains they had on my ankles."

"Six more weeks, Xander," Draco reminded him.  "Just six more weeks."

Ethan smiled.  "Always a bright side, boy?" he taunted.

"Bright side?" he snorted, sneering back.  "My father's gone so I'm free of that hurdle.  I didn't have to pay for an assassin to do so.  The family fortunes are now mine.  I'm not stuffed up as well.  My life's peachy," he assured him.  Xander pouted at him.  "If I was stuffed up, the world would've ended," he assured him, patting him on the back.  "Now, take your friend out back so you can get some fresh air and gentle exercise while your father has a drink."  Xander nodded, walking outside with Ethan.  Draco looked at his teacher.  "Could be a lot worse."

"It could be," he agreed. "It could be triplets and Rosenburg could be the other parent."  He went to get a drink and then check on his son some more.  He'd stay over tonight so no one could corner him about his son.

Draco took his own drink back to the new potion's lab, getting back to work on what the boy would need tomorrow.  Bill could secure the house for them.


Harry, finally awake and having eaten, looked at the people gathered around to stare at him.  "What?" he asked.

"Why were you off campus, Mr. Potter?" Professor McGonagall asked.

"I went with Dawn when she said the protection charm she had on Professor Snape's son went off.  He had been taken hostage and managed to free himself right before the battle."

"I see," Professor Dumbledore said, looking amused at that.  "What is wrong with the young man?"

Harry shrugged.  "I'm on for protection, not for daily stuff, sir.  Ask Ron.  He was there for daily protection of the boy.  All I know is that he was living on the hellmouth thanks to you and his mum and they had to call in Bill Weasley to help relieve him of some of the crud he had sucked up over there.  I was told he was injured."

"I see."  The head auror stared at him.  "Would anyone know more?"

"Probably no one you'll find anytime soon," Harry offered, shrugging a bit.  "You could ask Dawn."

"I tried.  She walked off cackling.  That is not appropriate for a young witch in our world, Mr. Potter."

"Her sister's a slayer.  She was being taught magic on the hellmouth by a wandless witch."

"They don't exist," the auror said coldly.  "They're a myth, Mr. Potter."

"Then you explain how one very cranky redheaded woman destroyed that house," he quipped back, staring at him.  He finally pulled his wand and summoned Dawn.  "Accio Dawn."  She came flying in and landed on her butt, still eating her ice cream.  "They wanted to know about the wandless stuff."

"Huh."  She stood up and raised a hand, chanting quietly.  Then the people there slammed into walls.  "Still think we're a myth on the hellmouth?"  She finished her sundae and put the glass down, then the spoon inside once she had licked it clean.  "Ah, I feel better now."  She smiled at Harry.  "How's Ron?  I'm not allowed in to check on him."

"Should be fine.  I haven't had a chance to get up there yet.  I got woken, fed, and then drug in here by a house elf."

"Huh."  She looked around.  "Dobby?" she called sweetly.  The house elf popped in, staring at her. "Can you go check on Ron for us?  He's in the infirmary."

Dobby nodded, his ears flapping, and he disappeared.  He came back a minute later.  "Weasey is being sleeping," he reported.  "Weasey will be fine according to Missus Nurse Lady.  Missus Nurse Lady said she fix Weasey up very well and Weasey will wake up in the morning like normal boys do."

Dawn scratched his ear, making him thump a foot on the floor. "Thank you, Dobby.  I'll get you a brand new pair of socks next time I run out."  He beamed and disappeared.  She looked at Harry. "Apparently he didn't take any permanent harm after being captured."

"Good.  We've got to put something on him to make sure it doesn't happen again."

"Bill's with Xander."

Harry looked at the people just now getting free of the walls.  "Has anyone told his mum and dad?"

"Not yet," Professor McGonagall offered, dusting herself off.  "We haven't figured out what to tell her yet."  She looked at him.  Then at Dawn. "What is wrong with Professor Snape's son?"

"Rosenburg and my sister decided to tie him tighter to them.  They enacted a fertility rite and put it on him.  He's due in about two months I think."   The teacher went pale.  "Of course, no one here's going to be able to say a word about it."  Giles and Willow both appeared.  "Hi, guys."  She hugged Giles.  "Make sure they can't speak about it?"

"Of course."  He looked at Willow, who sighed and did that.  "Thank you, Willow."

"I'm sorry I destroyed the house," she said impatiently.  "How's Xander?"

"He's fine," Harry told her.  "As far as we know.  He's in hiding."

"Good!  He should be hiding from the bad guys."  She glared at the aurors.  Then she shook her head and muttered something, cleaning them up and unsticking the last stuck one from the bookcase.  "Better?"

"How did you do that?"

"I'm powerful," she said dryly.  Giles coughed.  "Sorry.  I'm a witch like that.  I follow Hecate.  I do things with candles and herbs.   I close hellmouths."  She shrugged. "Just another wacky day in Sunnydale."  She looked at Dawn. "Your mother wants a call."

"I'll do that tomorrow."  She grinned. "I've got to pop out of bounds to do that.  No electronics here."

"That's fine," Willow assured her.  "Giles told her that."  She looked at the headmaster.  "So was that all his pitiful party or are there more we can destroy for you in the finest Sunnydale fashion?"

"That was the greater majority of his higher minions," Harry offered with a small smile. "Thank you for that."

"Eeh, it was a hormone swing," she admitted. "Thankfully we're only paying for making Xander pregnant during the daytime.  Otherwise Buffy would be *way* cranky on the vamps and demons every night."  She looked at Dawn. "That was mean."

"And you making Xander pregnant wasn't?"

"Well, yeah," she sighed, slumping some.  "Tell him I'm sorry?"

"I think he's sure of that already," she told her, frowning some.  "Just think, he'd still be at home if it wasn't for you.  Now he's having to catch up with the magic stuff he couldn't get before and all that stuff.  Plus I'll get to be an honorary auntie soon."

"You'll make a very good one, Dawn," Giles soothed, smiling and patting down some hair.  "Calm down."  He looked at the headmaster.  "Should I send my slayer over to help you round up any remaining problems?  She and Willow are quite the effective team."

"No, we can do that," the auror said firmly, staring at Rosenburg.  "Prove it."

Willow looked at him then sighed and walked over to lay a hand on his forehead, closing her eyes and saying something before staring into his eyes.  A few minutes later he shuddered and backed away from him.  "Need more proof we exist?"

"No," he decided.  "I thank you for today's intervention."

"Not an issue.  Dawnie's right, it's my fault that Xander got taken.  I was a bad witch to make Xander pregnant.  It's my fault."  She sniffled and Giles patted her on the back.  "I'm sorry I'm such a bad witch.  I need better guidance."

"That's because you won't let me guide you," Giles reminded her.  "You sneak behind my back to do some of the most odd things, Willow.  It really must stop."

"Yes, Giles," she said weakly, looking up at him.  "I'm sorry."

"You will be soon."  He frowned at her then at the others.  "Can we be of more assistance?"

"Where is the young man in question?  We could have him here," Dumbledore suggested.

Dawn snorted. "Fat chance, Headmaster.  We want Xander *safe*.  That means safely away from everyone who'd want to use him or his daughter.  Including you and your convenient memory charms.  By the way, they don't work on me.  Never have.  Xander is staying right where he is and his helpers are staying with him.  His father doesn't know what to do with a Xander so he's gonna come and go probably but otherwise all we want is him to be safe.  Trust us, the nurse knows.  She's seen him."  Harry nodded.  "See?  Now, if there's nothing else we should go check on Ron personally.  Then I've got to do some Charm's homework for tomorrow.  Professor McGonagall?"

"Go, child."  She nodded and left with Harry.  She looked at Willow then at Giles.  "You're keeping her on a shorter leash?"

"When I can.  Often we need her to branch out on the hellmouth, Professor.  She truly is one of the most powerful of our kind available."  That got a nod from her.  "Now, I'm going to take her home.  She's still got some battle fatigue and we're about due for another apocalypse there shortly so she'll need to rest and save up."  He nodded at the others.  "Any other questions?"  They shook their heads so those two left.

The Headmaster looked at the others.  "She had come to offer her assistance but I thought it best we decline because we weren't sure it was safe for her to do so."

McGonagall looked at him then at the aurors. "They're handling it quite well on their own, boys.  I wouldn't worry about the two worlds crossing over very often."

"Could we study what they do?" one of the junior aurors asked.

"You might have to go to California," she offered.  "They're on the hellmouth out there."

"I can do that," he agreed, looking at his boss, who nodded that it was acceptable.  "Then I'll go soon as I pack."  He headed off through the floo.

The head auror cleared his throat.  "It's one less worry at least.  I would like to talk to Professor Snape."

"He's with his son," Professor Dumbledore said quietly.  "All we knew was he was ill.  Dark magic poisoning."

"I'm not surprised if the area's anything like the stories say," he agreed.  "The boy probably sucked it up the whole time he was there.  It's like other forms of magic.   You can't help sucking it up, even muggles.  Since he's at least a squib...."  He shrugged.  "I'll handle the case of the boy for you, Albus."  The headmaster opened his mouth.  "I don't think you'll need a pregnant young man in this school.  Do you?"  He shook his head.  "Then I'll handle that.  It'll keep you and his father from butting heads over the child's fate."  Bill Weasley walked in.  "I heard you were involved."

"I am.  Draco did a listening charm.  He's fine.  She's fine.  We've got what we need as long as we're safe and the nurse can still come.  Xander likes her.  Yes, he's still mad at his former friends.  Yes, he had a shitload of dark magic in his body.  We did it like we would a pregnant cursebreaker in the field."  That got a smile and a nod.  "They had been draining it until Ron asked for my help on a spell on Malfoy.  As of this moment, Xander wants to be left alone.  Fully left alone.  He's safe.  He's hidden again.  Voldemort's dead?"  That got a nod.  "Good for Rosenburg then.  We've got it.  If you wanna know how it was done, his father has the memories in a pensieve at his house.  He said he'd let you have access to it tomorrow.  As of right now, he's making sure his son is fine, Headmaster, and he'll be back for breakfast and classes."  He nodded at Professor McGonagall.  "Hello, Professor.  Ron?"

"Dobby checked for the others.  He's apparently fine."

"That's fine.  Harry can tell mum so we can all hide," he offered with a grin.  "We're still trying to keep it a bit more secret?"  He looked at the auror, who nodded that he agreed. "Thanks.  Now, I'm off again.  Headmaster, Draco did say to send anything for him to Professor Snape and he'd send it on to him.  The house is now under a Fidelus charm.  I did it myself."  He disappeared, going to Snape's house through the floo, then apparating there.  "Okay, done."  He smiled at Draco.  "Gave your message too."

"Thank you."  He went back to his reading.  "Having her show up then was a stroke of brilliance, Xander.  Good planning."

"It stopped all the fits.  Besides, I was planning the major battles back there," he said dryly, going back to his comics.  His father snorted but only shook his head. "I did graduation."

"You did a very good job, son.  It is still not something I'd like to think upon."

"Good point.  Me either."  He yawned and leaned against Draco's side, still reading until he fell asleep.

Draco looked at the heavy head. "That is normal, correct?" he asked Bill.

"Mum used to nap like a cat all the time.  Sit down and she's out in any position she lands in."

"Good to know."  He went back to reading, not moving Xander.  He'd whine if he did.  Snape gave him an odd look over the edge of his book.  "He'll complain if I move him.  Then he gives you this horrible pitiful look for disturbing his nap, plus he swats at you now and then when you try to move him from his comfortable position."

"Oh."  He shook his head again.  "Has anyone told your mother, Bill?"

"Not yet and I'm hiding until she's calm, mate.  Not like I'm gonna be anywhere near that fit."

Draco snickered.  "My own mother will throw a fit when she finds out as well.  Just more quietly and with thrown pottery."  He turned the page and got involved again.  The comics fell and Bill moved them so no one would step on them or rip them on Xander.  He's cry again.  Those hormone swings were going to drive them all nuts...especially the boy.


Ron woke up to screaming.  He held his head and looked around with his eyes half-open. "SHUT UP!" he yelled.  His mother quit screaming.  "Thank you!  I don't need more of a headache, mum!"  He sat up with his father's help.  "What happened?  I mean after I got captured."

"They used polyjuice on Lucius so he could go capture Xander," Dawn said from the foot of his bed.  She grinned and handed over some juice.  "The stuff from breakfast."

"Thanks.  Food?"

"The nurse said in a few.  You good?"

"Feel like shite," he muttered, sipping his pumpkin juice.  "He okay?"

"They're both just fine.  He only had him for a few hours.  Didn't hurt him.   He wanted her as an heir.  We were on the rescue mission when Xander got himself out of there.  Then I got Willow into it."  She beamed.  "Which gave a lot of people headaches but we found you when she disintegrated the house."

"Even better."  He finished his juice and put it down, looking at his pouting mother. "What?"

"You've known what they did to him?"

"I was doing the concealment and shields around him, mum.   I'm also the reason Bill got called in to help."  Dawn nodded at that.  He looked at her again.  "We in trouble?"

"The headmaster disappeared last night.  He came back this morning cheerful and happy but not realizing what was going on.  I'm not sure why or who."  She shrugged.  "Harry and I agreed, it's freaky and we'll help you protect Xander if necessary but we don't want to be there for the birth."

Ron nodded. "Me either.  Ferret's doing medical stuff for him, he can watch."  He looked at his family, then the nurse behind them.  "Please get me something to eat and some more juice?  When can I go back to class?"

"Tomorrow," Madam Pomfrey assured him. "You can have more juice and food in a moment, Mr. Weasley.  Get your family calmed down first."

Ron looked at them.  "At least it's not me who's afflicted with that curse."  Every one of his family members shuddered at that thought.  "Or the twins."  That got a harder shudder.  "I know I was captured but I'm fine.  My head's a bit tender."  He reached up.  "Missing hair?"  Dawn nodded.  "Pity.  But it'll regrow."  He looked at his mother again.  "Bill was gonna teach him how to change nappies."

"I can do that better," she said firmly.

"As long as you don't nag, whine, or yell at him or else I will become scary once again," Dawn said dryly.  That got a harsh look and she glared back.  "I am a bit powerful and I do know what Rosenburg does," she pointed out.  "She was teaching me.  I'm here to learn control.  Plus watch over Harry and Ron some since they get into so much trouble."  That got a nod and the whole clan left.  She looked at the nurse.  "So," she said brightly.  "How is Xander?"

"He's fine.  I checked him earlier.  The baby's just fine, Dawn.  He's a bit tired still.  The apparation didn't hurt him in the least."  She grinned.  "He'll be delivering in about five to six weeks.  Mr. Weasley, they're wondering if you want to go back?"

"Probably should, just in case.  Harry?"

"Wants to escape anyway," she admitted.  That got a nod and she checked him over.  "You've taken no lasting harm."

"The hair'll grow back?"

"It will.  It's already starting to."  That got a grin from the young man.  "Any other concerns?"

"Torture?  I was pretty out of it."

"Intentionally.  They kept you sedated with various hexes and charms.  It took me nearly four hours to unravel them all.  They hadn't had any fun with you if that's what you're asking."  He nodded. "I should also tell you that the greater majority of the upper echelon of Death Eaters were taken out with the rescue.  Miss Rosenburg is very scary when she's upset."

"Go us, another bad guy bites the dust Sunnydale Style," Dawn agreed happily.  "Food?"

"Please," Ron moaned.

"Dobby?" she called.  Dobby showed up with a huge tray.  "Thanks, love."  She handed it to Ron then gave Dobby another ear scratch.  "Such a good house elf."  Dobby beamed.  "Where's Harry?"

"Harry Potter is in Potions.  Teacher is very much sneering again."

"Eeeh, so I'm missing that.  That's fine.  Thank you, Dobby."  He nodded and disappeared.  She had gotten him some pantyhose and he was trying to figure out how to wear them.  She grinned.  "I went with tights for kids."

"That's a scary thought with how much he likes socks," Ron said, then he grabbed his fork.  "Any reason I can't eat?"

"Don't make yourself sick," the nurse sighed, walking off.  "You can be released tonight if you want."

"There's no if about it, Madam Pomfrey.  I hate the infirmary as much as Harry does."  He dug in, making a pig of himself but he was hungry!  Dawn refilled his juice cup, gave him a kiss on the cheek, then disappeared to go do scary girl things.  He was thankful he wasn't being asked to help her do more scary girl things but that was fine.  He was still hungry. Food then girls, alphabetical priorities for his life.


Xander woke up in pain a few weeks later, grimacing at his stomach.  "Ow, kid."  He sat up and made himself rest against the headboard.  The next pain started and he panted through it, then looked up.  "Draco!" he yelled once he could breathe again.  Draco came trotting in.  "I think she thinks it's time."   He clutched his arm at the next pain.  "If not, get her out anyway!" he demanded.

"All right.  Lay back down," he soothed, helping him back onto his back.  He looked at his stomach then went to get his wand so he could check him over.  "There we are.  Yes, it's definitely time.  Bill, get the nurse!" he called.  He found the pain potions he had brewed, bringing them back.  "Here, suck this down.  It'll hurt less."  Xander gulped it and relaxed as it took hold. "Good boy.  Now one more potion, this way you won't remember the specifics.  My mum had it when she had me."  He let him have the haziness potion.  Xander started to giggle with the pain - it was merciful in his mind.  The nurse and Professor Snape both rushed in.  "I've give him a mental clouding potion my mother used and a pain potion. He's good to go.  She's trying to shift to get into a better position."  The nurse nodded and checked him over, starting a separating charm.  "Eugh!" he complained, looking away.

"Welcome to medicine, Mr. Malfoy," she said primly while she worked.  "Insides are bloody and nasty.  Outsides are often just as bad.  But it is a rewarding field," she admitted, finding the sack and pulling it out.  The baby was freed and handed off to Draco. "Like I showed you."  She got to work cleaning out the womb the boy had grown.  It was more merciful.  They weren't sure if her spell meant he could get stuffed up again if he had male-on-male sex.  She finished up while Draco tried to get her fully breathing on her own.  She took over but it wasn't working.

"DAWN!" Draco yelled.  "She's in trouble!"

Dawn appeared in jammies, her hair tied up in a ponytail.  "You had to do this the night before a huge ass exam?"  She laid a hand on the baby's head and got to work steadying her.  "It's all the extra dark magic.  Bill?"  He came in, not looking at the mother.  "Here, we need to finish draining her."

"We can do that."  He and she got to work stabilizing the baby.  She was finally pink, healthy, and fussy.  "There," he said, smiling at her.  "Go check on the mother."

"He'll pounce you if you call him that," she quipped, going to do that.  "He's all right.  Full of good energy for once.  It's going to give him a horrible headache later."  She smoothed down his hair and worked a healing spell, then smiled.  "There we go, and he's still asleep."  She looked at the nurse.  "Can you give McGonagall an excuse for me?"

"I can."  Dawn hugged her then left.  Madam Pomfrey came over to check on the baby.  "She's adorable and healthy, Severus.  Do we have a name?"

"He was thinking Patricia for some reason," Draco admitted.  "Xander!" he called. "What's the baby's name?"  He got a snore.  "Xander!" he tried again.

"Let 'im sleep, Malfoy," Bill complained.  Xander blinked at him. "Did we pick out a name?"

"Nope."  He closed his eyes again.  "Do it in the morning."  He flipped onto his side then reached down to his stomach, sitting up abruptly, which made him hiss and bend down. "I take it you've got her?"

"We do, son.  Rest," Severus said quietly.  He brought her over so his son could see her.  "There she is."

Xander looked at the baby.  "Hi, sweetie. We'll figure out a name tomorrow.  Is she a witch?"

"A fairly powerful one," Madam Pomfrey assured him.

"Then don't name her something stupid.  Nothing made up.  A name that's already a name."

"Merlina?" Draco suggested.

"No, that would be a made up name, Draco.  Nothing that sounds like a Greek person wrote it long ago."  He relaxed and let his daughter rest beside him.  He yawned.  "No naming her after her creators either.  Any idea who the other parent is?"

Madam Pomfrey did the test and looked at it then at him.  "Hmm."  She glanced at Draco, who looked stunned.  She nodded.

"How?" he demanded coolly.

She shrugged. "I don't know.  Perhaps you're the first person she liked."

"She never liked me.  She always liked Weasley."

"Well, she liked you enough to make you her father," she said dryly.

"Then *you* go tell my mum."  He walked off shaking his head, slamming his bedroom door.

Severus looked then shrugged. "I have no idea."  He walked over to take his granddaughter.  "I'll sit with her, Xander.  You rest."

"Sure," he agreed sleepily. "Might wanna put on a diaper and feed her.  Call Giles.  That stuff."  He flopped a hand and went back to sleep with a murmured 'drugs nice'.

Bill looked at the nurse.  "Can you make it official?"  She nodded. "Then I'll drop it off in the morning."  He went back to his room, but came back with the care package his mother had sent.  "Here, from my mum."  He went back to his room to sleep.

The nurse and grandfather both looked at each other then got to work caring for the little darling.


Bill Weasley knocked on the Malfoy's front door.  "Is Narcissa in?" he asked the house elf, stepping inside. "I've got a missive from her son."  The house elf hurried off and she came down the stairs a moment later.  "Mrs. Malfoy, I've got a letter from Draco for you explaining his recent absence."

"I heard from your mother why."

"I can explain it fully."

"Into the drawing room, please."  He followed her that way and sat down, looking at her.  "My son is fine?"

"Perfectly fine, ma'am."  He handed over the letter.  "It started a few months back when the Witch to the Slayer decided her best friend was leaving their lives."  She looked startled at that.  "Her best friend is Professor Snape's son Alexander."

"I saw what she did to the McNair's.  How did that end up with him being a father?"

"She decided to tie him to them by making him pregnant," he said bluntly.  "He's not the father, he's the mother.  Xander found out and came to see his dad, a wise thing since he had sucked up dark magic for years on the Hellmouth."  She let out a small moan at that.  "Draco's part has been to do the potions and medical parts when Madam Pomfrey couldn't get there.  My own brother Ron was doing the protection for him.  Then you placed the charm on him so I had to get involved.  He's perfectly fine, but in the note you'll be a bit stunned.  Apparently Rosenburg never firmly set who the father was so the child was allowed to grab magic and bind it to hers in a paternal sense."

She opened the letter, looking at the picture with a small smile.  "She's adorable."

"She is but a bit fussy now and then.   Likes her grandfather more than mom today."

She read over the letter, then looked at him.  "This is the truth?"

"We don't know how she did it, or how Rosenburg set it.  It was probably bollixed by something on the hellmouth.  Maybe the former demon Xander had been dating before she did it.  She chose him.   We're kinda glad she didn't choose Ron, Mum would've freaked out more."  She put the letter aside.  "As of this moment Xander's denying that Draco is a father or a human being, but he's still coming down off the hazing potion Draco made him from the birth.  We think he'll be straight by tonight."

"Where are they?"

"At a muggle place.  We have it under fidelius charm with the problems we've had during the pregnancy.  That would be why the Witch Rosenburg destroyed the McNair's a few weeks back."  She nodded once at that.  "I can bring you there if you want or you can wait for two days for Xander and Draco to talk first.  He said he'd leave it up to your good sense."

"My son and granddaughter needs me.  What did we name her?"

"Xander hates all the names we've suggested.  Calls them made up names."  She pursed her lips together. "He did grow up over there.  His mum stole him to the Hellmouth and settled down to live as a muggle.  He's only known muggle things.  He's still catching up to the magic stuff."

"Then my son definitely needs me at this moment.  Let me prepare myself.  Lucius would be beside himself at this situation."

"He's the one who pretended to be my brother Ron to snatch Xander," he said bluntly.  "Xander's said he didn't blame you or Draco for him."

She nodded at that advice, going to change clothes and put on a cloak.  She rejoined him and he handed her the note to where they were.  She read it then they apparated there.  She took off her cloak and handed it to Severus, who exchanged it for her granddaughter.  "She's adorable."

"Mum!" Draco complained.

Xander snickered, then was swatted.  "Dear."  She stared at him.  She walked in to sit down properly and look at Xander.  "You're Severus' son?"  He nodded, grinning at her.  "I'm Draco's mother, Narcissaa.  You can call me Mother."

"Mum," Draco complained again.

"No, son.  A true Malfoy is always able to take care of his own offspring."  She stared at him then looked at her granddaughter.  "Hello, dear.  I'm your grandmother."  She saw Xander yawn.  "Rest, dear.  You've had a harrowing ordeal."

"Nothing like battle," he complained but he was slipping back down on the couch until he was parallel to the surface. Then he fell asleep with a quiet snore.

Draco shook his head.  "He's still out of it.  Doesn't like a single name."

Harry walked in and handed over a book.  "Find one you like.  Those are muggle baby names."  He looked at the child, then grinned at her.  "Hi, Mrs. Malfoy.  She's a healthy little girl.  Cried most of the morning because Mum tried to give her a bottle."  He looked at Bill.  "Your mother is screaming again.  In Diagon."  Bill sighed and went to stop her again.  He looked at Severus. "The headmaster is doing the same in the Great Hall about you being missing, still.  Should I hand him anything other than the 'he's with his newborn granddaughter' we've been giving him for the last two hours?  Even Professor McGonagall can't get him calmed down this time, Professor Snape."

"I'll go over for a few hours," he agreed.  "Thank you, Mr. Potter, now go away."

"Of course.  Oh, Ron's out of the infirmary."  He headed back to the school, nodding at his teacher.  "He's on his way back for a bit," he said quietly.  Then he went to class.  Defense was not fun this year but oh well.

Severus walked into the Great Hall, looking at his boss.  "You needed my attention so firmly away from my newborn granddaughter?"

"Her name shows up wrong on the list!" he said, glaring at him.  "What did you do?"

"It was not I, it was the circumstances of her birth, Albus.  How does she show up?"

"She's in a ghostly font," McGonagall offered quietly.

"Then she'll clearly be like both parents and her creator.  Xander does have both sides of the skills.  He had to learn at an early age."  He looked at his headmaster again.  "I've submitted my leave forms.  I'll be back in two weeks, when I'm sure my son and granddaughter are both healthy again."  He walked out, heading back to the house.  He found Ethan in there doting on her and coughed.  "The ghostly font?"

"She's both," Draco assured him.  "Dawn looked."  He looked at his mother.  "I have no problem taking responsibility for her, Mother."

"Good, then we'll get on with the bonding this month," she said happily.

"Except that part," he said firmly, staring her down.  "It is not the match Father or anyone would approve of."

"Dear, he's been kissed," she said dryly.  Then she smiled sweetly.  "Xander, you will be making my granddaughter legitimate won't you?"

Xander blinked at her, yawning a bit while he thought.  "I don't like magic that much and he'd have to go live with me somewhere else."  His father scowled at him.  "I can't find a job around here."

"Not like you have to worry about that if you do make my granddaughter a legitimate heir," she pointed out gently.

He glared at her. "I like working."  She slumped.  "I'm not going to be some kept princess in a tower."

"You're definitely no princess," Draco assured him dryly.  "I'll claim her as a magical accident, Mother.  She basically is and I'm not going to deny her existence.  I am not going to marry the git however."

"You will or I will disown you, son."

He gave her a hurt look then pointed at Xander.  "He doesn't want to either!"  He thought.  "You can't do that!   You're only considered a consort and I'm of age, Mother."  She gave him a look then a pointed look at his daughter.  "Should you try that I would feel more than reasonable to disown her."  She gave him a hurt look.  "I don't care!  I'm not Father!"  He stood up and took his daughter back.  "I do wish you had stayed away a few more days."  He handed off the baby and stomped off.

"Okay, so maybe I'd be keeping a princess in a tower," Xander muttered, looking at his daughter.   "How about this, Mother, we'll like Draco.  Draco can have visitation and so can you.  The first time you try to fuck with me or her I'm letting Ethan have fun.  He does owe me," he said, staring Ethan down, getting a quick nod.  "Thank you."  He looked at Narcissa.  "I'm used to bad guys and slayers.  Petty politics can only annoy me."   She blushed at that.  "Am I clear?"  She nodded once.  "Thank you.  Baby name book?" he asked.  Ethan tossed it down and he looked through it.  "Hmm.  Eris?" he asked, looking at the baby.

"After the Greek Goddess of Discord," Ethan purred, smiling at him. "It would fit her."

"Gee, what a shock with how she came to be."  He marked that place and moved on.  "Find a middle name," he said, handing over the book. "You're sure?"

"She'll have chaos skills in the wandless areas and full skills with a wand," Ethan assured him.  "Eris Olympia Snape?"  Xander gave him a look.  "Eris Olivia?"

"EOS, Ethan?"

"Hmm.  Eris Evelyn Snape?  Or Eris ....."  He thought.  "Eris Ephemera Snape?"  Xander gave him a look.  "I'll call Ripper than, shall I?"  He picked up the phone and called over there.  "Ripper, old chap.  She's born.  Going over the name details.  Well, she'll be a bit like me really with some of her father's thrown in.  No, she's got both sides.  Chaos and then wanded magic.  Xander's decided on Eris for a first name.  Last name is Snape.  Need a good middle one."  He smiled at that.  "He likes Rachel."  Xander shook his head quickly.  "No, he didn't like that one.  Go ahead."  He smiled as Giles spread around that news.  "Hmm.  Miss Summers, the brat, wanted her to be named after her.  Willow quieted her.  She suggested something natural to counteract the chaos first name."

"Will she have nature magic?"

"Chaos is every bit as natural, just less predictable," he informed him.  "She thought some sort of tree name."

"No. I'm not naming the baby after her."  He smiled.  "Eris Jessie Snape."  That got a nod and Ethan reported that then hung up giggling.  "Shocked silence?"


"Okay."   He looked at his father.  "Argue and I'll burn the library."

"I won't.  I remember your friend," he said calmly.  He took the baby.  "Come, Eris.  Let's see the crib, love."  He walked her off, taking her to put her down.  He found Draco up there.  "He's named her Eris Jessie."

"Eris Jessie?"  He frowned.

"Jesse was a friend who died," he said quietly.  "He went with the female spelling for her name."

"Oh.  Well then that's perfectly reasonable," he decided, heading back down there.  "You do need some rest, Xander."

"I'm resting!  It's not like I'm up chopping wood."

"Nap.  I'll deal with my mother," he finished quietly as he tucked him in.  He looked at his mother.  "Now, I believe we still need to talk, Mother?"

"She is our heir, Draco."

"And I'll gladly admit such as a magically based accident.  It's as close to her origins as I can come without causing the whole wizarding world to go after her creators."  She sighed at that.  "I do admire him for sticking it out but I'm not desiring him."  Xander tugged on his arm and pouted at him.  "Quit, buggerer.  You like women as well."

"I do."  He flipped onto his side.  "I should probably nap upstairs.  Let you two talk."  Ethan helped him up there, putting him back into bed.  "Thanks, Ethan."

"We still have to modify the bindings on your wrists," he said gently.  "Plus you'll need someone to save you from that mother dragon."   He kissed him on the forehead and left again.  He went back down to observe Draco working his mother over.  It was a good show.  Even if his mother would be winning.  A new grandmother almost always won over parents.


Severus walked into the school, handing Minerva her copy of the pictures and the announcement.  "Xander won the argument.  Eris is not going to have two parents."  He kept walking.  "Xander is back at my house, they're both perfectly healthy, and I'll expect him to come up sometime in the near future to make Miss Summers make disgusting noises at my granddaughter."  He walked into his classroom, flinging the door open.  The substitute in there, a seventh year Slytherin Honors Potions student, gave him a nod and went to his office to gather her notes for him. "I am back, things will be going back to normal."  A house elf appeared wailing and crying pitifully.   "What now?"

"Daddy Snape, must come.  Must come now!" the house elf wailed.  "Daddy Snape, must come!"

Snape sighed and followed him back through the floo.  House elves were such alarmist creatures.  As long as his son wasn't pregnant *again* it probably didn't need a crying and wailing house elf.

The End.