Children of Hunters.

 
 
 
 

Dean was driving along, listening to the music he had playing, ignoring his brother's snoring and drooling in the seat next to him when something odd happened.  He wasn't used to road rage, even though he did drive pretty fast now and then - usually for good reasons.  This time the other driver was someone strange.  They pulled up next to him then suddenly spun in front of him to block the road.  Dean had to stop suddenly, which made Sam wake up and swear as he grabbed the dashboard.  "What the fuck?" Dean shouted.

Sam put a hand on his arm.  "Don't get out yet.  Let them make a move first."

"Like hell!  They tried to kill us!"  He got out, leaning on his door, one hand next to his gun.  "You had better have a *damn* good explanation for that move."  The man that got out of the tinted car was a demon.  He was green and had scales, he had to be.  Dean grabbed his gun and Sam  hopped out with his.  "What are we thinking, boys?  Ambushing us?  It won't work."

The demon stepped closer, his hands out from his body and in plain sight.  "We mean you no harm.   We come to you for help."

"You came to *hunters* for help?" Sam asked dryly.  "Why?"

The demon stared at him.  "Our clan has rivals."

"Yeah, and?" Dean demanded, not lowering his gun.  "Why would that bother us?"

The demon stared at him.  "Our clan recently went against one of our enemies.  They were doing things that are unholier than most."  He sneered.  "While there we found things you should see.  They are in the car, Hunter.  They are related to you and your clan."

"What sort of things?" Sam asked.  "Plans?  Maps?  Journal entries?"

"Your spawn."  He looked at Dean again, seeing the anger.  His lifeline got suddenly shorter by the look in his eyes.  The small tic that developed in the other one's cheek told him it would be a tossup who got his body first after the loud one shot him.  "The other clan had them made as powerful sacrifices on their first birthday.  By doing this we take back some of the honor they took from us long ago."

"Plus piss them off for having the audacity to do this," Sam agreed.

Dean calmed himself, he had to.  "They had our kids *made*?" he growled.  So maybe he wasn't quite approaching calm yet.  That'd probably take a hell of a lot of gun cleaning, target practice, and beating the hell out of something, or multiple somethings.

The demon pointed at the car.  "You can see them for yourself.  Those in my clan do not want them.  No other clans either."

Dean looked at Sam, who nodded he had him covered.  He walked over with the demon, looking in the back.  The driving demon put down the window for him.  He kept himself from hitting the demon.  He'd hit him later.  He'd even be nice enough to give him a head start so he could hunt and wear out more of the anger.  "How old are they?" he asked quietly.  They were sleeping for now and he didn't want to wake them up.  Plus, quiet equaled hiding how pissed he was for the moment.

"Seven months."  He stared at him.  "The family's curse could not be activated.  The demons there would not let anyone else have them.  It would ruin their plans."  He stepped away at the anger in those green eyes.   "We only do this to get them back, Hunter.  All we know is that a witch had them.  She was slightly powerful but that is all we know."

"They're human?" Sam asked.  "Fully?"  The demon nodded.  "Tainted?"

"We know not what they did," the driver said, getting out.  "This is our method of getting back at the clan who tries to kill our females."  He looked at Dean.  "There is one from each of you.  Your son is much like your brother from what we understand."

"The mother?" Dean asked less calmly.  The tic in Sammy's face was starting on his left eye.

The demons both shrugged.  "No other humans were there," the driving one said.  "It is your choice.  We can drop them off in some city's hospital."

"Like hell," Dean spat.  "We'll take them with us."  He nodded, helping him undo the ugly carseats.  "Do they have anything else?"

"We have a small bag of supplies."  The non-driving one handed it over from the trunk.  "That is all we rescued or bought since we rescued them.  It took us three days to find you.  We have had them for five days."

Sam took one of the carriers back to the Impala, putting it into the back.  He helped Dean hitch down the other one.  He looked at the demon.  "Thank you for rescuing them.  I suggest you hide before they track you or them."  That would give them a head start for bringing their kids to them before they destroyed those demons too.  That got a nod and they got into the car to head off at a higher rate of speed.  He leaned on the roof of the car, looking at his brother across it.   "You good?"

"No.  You?"

"Hell no."  They glanced in at the babies then at each other.  "Hospital?  Priest?"

Dean considered it.  "Missouri.  She'd be able to tell if they were tainted and possibly if they're  ours."

Sam grinned.  "I like that idea.  We're only about five hours away.  I'll call ahead if you want."

"Please."  He glanced at them then around.

"Go scream, Dean.   I'll watch."   Dean nodded, heading off the side of the road to throw a loud, screaming fit.  Some things he could take without losing his cool.  Demons handing him his seven-month-old son was not one of them.  It'd be safer if he got it out of his system before he got back in to drive.  It really would for all of them.  He watched Dean come back, noticing he was moving stiffly and he was still pissed.  "We'll handle it, Dean."

"We traveled when you were a baby, we can do it with them," he said, trying to stay calm.  He got in to drive.  Sam made sure the kids were in tightly.  Dean revved the engine and headed off at a high rate of speed.

"Dean, no going that fast," Sam complained quietly.  "We can blow something up later or something."  Dean slowed down marginally.  "You'll make them sick.  They'll puke in the car," he told him.  Dean slowed down a bit more.  He did not want baby puke in the car.  Sam glanced back, smiling at them.  "Hi, boys."  They both beamed at him and one waved.  "You two look very smart."

"How do they both have brown eyes?" Dean asked.

"Their mother must've."

Dean nodded once.  "Should we worry about looking?"

"I doubt she's alive," Sam said quietly.  "We'll ask around, see if someone recognizes her from the boys."  He glanced back then at Dean.  "At least you know how to change diapers and make bottles."

"I haven't done it since I was six, Sammy.  That's been a few  years," he said dryly.  He slowed down because they were coming up to a more patrolled, townish area.   "Call her?"

Sam found the phone and called.  "Missouri?  Sam.  Coming your way."  He grinned. "Of course you can spoil them.  Seven months.  Thanks."  He hung up.  "She said she's getting a few diapers, some extra clothes, and some baby food for them since they're old enough to eat."

"Good to know," Dean said, turning up the radio.  One fussed, one cooed.  He looked back in the mirror.  "Suck it up.  Sammy has to, you two have to."  They made it through the town and he sped up faster.  They needed answers before he finished letting his temper go.  Because if those were his kids, or his kid and his nephew, nothing was going to come between them.

Sam patted him on the thigh.  "We'll figure it out, Dean."

"I hope so."  He let his thoughts drift while his body drive by rote.  He had enough attention for both tasks and he had some heavy thoughts at the moment.  "They're the same age?" he asked finally.

"They said so."

"How?"

"Impregnated the mother with the samples at the same time?" Sam suggested.  "Demonic IVF?"

"How did they get samples?  I'm safe and you don't sleep around hardly ever.  I haven't slept with the same girls you have."

"I've had a dalliance outside those two you pushed me at, Dean."  Dean shot him an odd look.  "One."

"Who?"

"No comment but you didn't sleep with her too.  It means someone was planning something and stole it."  That got a single nod and the speed of the car inched up again.  "Dean, slow down before *I* get sick please?" he asked calmly.  Dean slowed down again.  "Thank you.  We'll get there soon enough."  He glanced back at the boys.  They were both starting to drift off, both of them staring at the other one.  "They looked a bit grungy but don't seem to be injured or hurt."

"Grungy we can take care of at her house," Dean reminded him.  "Then maybe a doctor and a priest."

"Pastor Jim?"

"Probably," Dean agreed.  "We'll put the last job out onto the 'net and see who else can handle it."  He was still thinking hard.  He had no idea what to do with *two* kids.  It had been a long time since Sammy had been a baby.

***

Dean walked in with one of the kids.  "Hey," he said quietly.  His temper was still high and she obviously realized it because she didn't try to touch him, hug him, or get close to him.

She stared at him then grinned.  "Only a Winchester can put up with that sort of stink.  You know where the bathroom is."

Dean nodded, heading that way with Sam right behind him and the diaper bag.  He got the first one's diaper open and grimaced, backing up.  "What is that?  A worm!" he demanded.  "Eww!"  He carefully cleaned him up.  "They were feeding you nasty crap, kid."   He finally got him clean and rediapered, watching as Sam tried it on the other one.  "Wipe in the other direction.  It helped with this one."  Sam did that and diapered him too.  They threw out the diapers and Dean was nice enough to take out the trash from up there because no one's house deserved that sort of stink.

Sam came down with the babies in the carriers.  "Missouri, they said they're ours, seven months old, and they're going to be sacrificed at a year old.  Can you tell anything?"

She picked up one.  "Well now, Timothy Winchester, how are we today?"  The baby beamed and patted her on the cheek.  "Yes, you're adorable and you flirt nearly as well as your Daddy does, sweetness."  She handed him to Dean since he was standing there.  "Yours."  She picked up the other one, smiling at him.  "And little Alexander Winchester.  Such a brave little one.  Very tight with his cousin."  He handed him to Sam.  "Yours."

"They were right?" Dean demanded.

She smirked and nodded.  "They were.  Someone was whispering about them.   Hints and rumors, nothing provable; the hunters out that way went looking and couldn't find the clan so they decided it was a myth.  That's why you hadn't heard."

Dean turned and dented the wall with a fist.  The baby 'oooh'ed at him, staring up at him with big eyes.  He looked down.  "Don't worry, Timmy, I'd never hurt you.  Walls and demons, not babies."  The baby beamed at him.  He sat down and the baby wiggled.  "What?"  He shifted his position on his lap.  The baby wiggled again until he nearly dived to the floor.  "Wanted down that badly?" he asked dryly.

The baby crawled over to Sam, pulling on him until Missouri helped him stand up.  "Mama!" he creeled, beaming at the big person.  "Mamamamamama!"

Sam smiled.  "No, that's your momma," he said, pointing at Dean.  "I'm this one's Daddy."

Dean looked at Missouri.  "He's not the mom, right?"

"No," she sighed, handing Timmy back.  "But they're like the other more or less.  Timmy's got a stronger mind.  Little Alex is a lot stronger physically.  They're also as tight as twins already."   Alex drove out of Sam's arms, making him fumble but catch him before he hit the floor.  Then he crawled off to be with his cousin.  She laughed.  "Those two are a handful already and just as stubborn as John ever was."  She smirked at both sons.  "The demons wanted to punish you boys by bringing them into being.  Then the powerful blood would give them a lot of power to try a world-takeover thing."

"So they've got colic?" Dean asked.

"No screaming yet," she teased back.  He groaned.  "I'll watch 'em tonight while you two go scream in the woods and stuff."  They smirked and left her alone to do that and talk.  She smiled at the boys.  "I'll keep your secret, boys.  Be good to those boys.  They need it."  She got them  upstairs to bathe.  They were filthy.  Demons wouldn't care if a baby was dirty or not in most cases.  The ones who had them certainly hadn't.  Only a Winchester or a demon baby had ever smelled that horrible.

***

Dean found the phone number he needed in his father's  journal.  "It's Dean," he said blandly.  "Tell our dad we're heading to Pastor Jim's and if he doesn't either show up there by the time we're there or meet up with us on the way from Missouri's, we're going to kick his ass.  Yes, it's damn important.  Oh, tell him not to come in armed.  It'll be worse if he does."  He hung up on that message.  They had ways of finding his father that they didn't.  He looked at his baby brother.  "I'm pissed," he said.

"I'm going to destroy the clan that had them created," Sam said, looking at him.  "You in?"

"Definitely.  This was a damn good way for the demons that had them to bring on their own deaths.  From the stink, any idea what had them?"

Sam smiled.  "I can identify what brought them and see which clans they have as enemies.  Then we can wipe out all the enemies and that clan last."

"That could work," Dean decided, sitting on his hood.  "What're we going to do with them?  It was hard enough traveling with you when you were that age."  He looked at Sam, who was pouting just a bit.  "Babies take a lot of stuff, Sammy.  Diapers, clothes, playpens, all sorts of stuff."

"Dad managed it with us.  Unless you want to quit hunting and settle down?"

Dean gave him an odd look.  "Were you possessed?"

"No," he said, shaking his head as he sat next to him.  "I don't think I'm ready to be a dad."

"Me either.  I've always made damn sure I wasn't going to be one."  He grimaced, arms crossing over his chest.  "Like their names?"

"I don't mind Tim and Alex."

"Timmy and Alex.  Fine.  Even if the kids are confused.  Think she's given them a bath by now?"

"Probably.  The kids did stink," Sam agreed, grinning just a bit.  They had aired out the car on the way here.  "Think Dad'll hear why before he meets us?"

"I think he'll find a way to intercept us before we get there but no one will know why."  He looked at him.  "At least the demon that got Mom and Jess didn't get them," he said quietly.

"Aren't I supposed to be the upbeat one?" Sam asked.

"Shut up, bitch."

"Oh, whine, jerk.  You're starting to go all chick flick."  Dean punched him on the arm.  "Ooooooh, tickles," he taunted.

Dean stared at him.  "Don't make me whip your ass again."

"Like you can!" he said sarcastically.  Dean pounced and it was on between them.  Dean needed the physical release and Sam could use the sparring practice anyway.  He finally ended up on his back, staring at his smirking older brother.  "You've been eating too much.  You weigh a ton."

"Yeah, yeah, blow it out your ass," he said, getting off him and helping him up.  "Think it's safe?"

"Nope.  She'll know we left them there and that smelly on purpose."

Dean smirked.  "Maybe she can figure out how to make the worms we saw go away."

"Maybe," Sam agreed.  "Think it was food or they have worms like dogs do?"

"Not really sure," Dean admitted.  "Couldn't tell if it was living or not.  I didn't want to get that close to it."   He walked off shaking his head.  "Get in the car, Sammy."

"It's Sam, Dean," he called, following along.  Or else he'd get left behind.  He made sure to dust himself off.  He didn't want Dean to complain about dirt and leaves on his precious seats.

***

Dean woke up at the first sniffle, staring at the little things that were sleeping between them on the only guest bed.  He leaned down to look at the baby.  "What's wrong?" he asked quietly.  The baby let out a full blown wail so he stood up to walk him up and down the hallway like his father had done to Sammy, and probably him.  "Tim, what's going on?  Do you hurt, are you hungry?  Let a guy know," he complained.

"He's dirty!" Missouri yelled from her room.

"Okay.  Didn't stink, sorry."  He went to change him, grimacing at the nastiness.  "I don't know *what* they fed you, son, but that's gross."  He had to duck his son's attempt to pee on him.  "Not on the hair, Tim," he complained.  He cleaned him up then diapered him, smirking a bit.  "We'll have to work on your aim so you get Sammy."  He put him back down, watching his cousin roll to hold him.  Then he went to clean up the mess before someone slipped and fell in it.  Not the most pleasant thing to do but he'd handled worse than body fluids in the past.   He walked out and sniffed then shuddered.  "Tim!"

"Not him," Sam muttered.  "Alex, do you need changed?"  The baby farted then snored.  "I'm thinking that's a yes."  He groaned as he got up, letting Dean help him pry his son off his cousin's chest.  "Come on, let's change you."  Alex let out a wail.  "Hey!  Trying to take care of the nastiness, Alex.  Stop it."  The baby wailed louder so he changed him anyway, grimacing at the nastiness in that diaper.  He handed him off to Dean while he washed his hands, sighing in relief when the wailing stopped.  He looked out there.  "They back together?"

"Alex sniffed Tim's chest then put his head down as hard as he could, wrapped himself around Tim's body, then fell back asleep."  He looked at his little brother.  "Some day we'll have to tell them they can't sleep together or do other things."

"If we have to have the incest talk with them, we'll let Dad or Pastor Jim give it.  I'm not up for that."  He laid back down, looking at the kids taking up Dean's side of the bed.  He carefully shifted Tim over, letting Dean have his warm spot.  "What time is it?"

"Four."  He covered the boys halfway and curled protectively around them.  "Night."

"Night."  He let himself drift off, but woke up suddenly when he felt little fingers under his t-shirt.  He looked down at the smiling baby.  "Hi, Alex."

"Mama?"

"No, I'm daddy.  Dada."  He pulled him up to cuddle, kissing him on the head.  The baby wiggled down and poked him then crawled underneath his shirt, trying to latch on.  "Jesus!" he shouted, hopping up, making the baby cry.  "Alex, sweetie, I can't feed you that way.  Are you hungry?  Come on, we'll get you something to nibble," he said, taking him down to the kitchen.  Dean was snickering into Tim's hair but he'd get him back later.  He sat his son on the counter, finding a jar of applesauce.  They sat down at the table to eat it together, making Alex a happy baby until he crapped again.  "Why did you do that?" he asked, sighing a bit at the end.  "Must you do that again already?"  The smell was going to get to him so he took him upstairs to change him, wincing at the renewed worm bits.  "Eww."  He got him cleaned up and brought him back to the bed.  "Want to cuddle Tim?"

"Mama!" he said happily.

Sam sat down on the side of the bed, letting him do whatever he wanted since he was awake.  His son crawled over to their bag and he decided it was like a kitty, exploring everything to learn his surroundings.  At least until he pulled out the knife and sucked on the handle.  "Um, no.  You can't use the knife as a pacifier."  He took it and put it back, hiding it better.  His son went back onto the bed.  Where he pounced his cousin to wake him up by crawling over him to snuggle under Dean's pillow.  He pulled out that knife, waking Dean.  "Sorry, he thinks they're pacifiers."

Dean looked at his nephew.  "You can't suck on the knife until you can sharpen it, Alex."  Tim pouted at him.  "What?" he demanded.  "Trying to sleep, guys.  Let's all sleep.  It'll be a really neat, fun game.  Okay?" he asked hopefully.  Alex pouted but got off the bed, going to crawl around a few times.  He watched him, just in case.  Tim was trying to get Sam's shirt off him for some reason.  "Son, you can't eat your uncle."  He stopped Alex getting the gun in his bag, making him wail loudly enough that the neighbors woke up and turned on lights.  "Sorry," he called out the open window.  "New baby syndrome."  He closed the window, glaring at his son.  "No guns."  The baby gave him the most pitiful look, staring up at him, blinking his big, brown, wet eyes.  "No."  He made sure it was unloaded and put the clip into his bag, then the gun into Sam's, zipping them both.  He put Alex onto the bed.  "You wanted to cuddle your cousin, cuddle him and let's nap."

Alex pouted at Tim.  "Mama," he said pitifully.

Tim scowled at his father.  "Gwap!" he said angrily.  He moved but Sam tried to stop him.  He swatted at him, glaring too.  He and Alex both got put onto the floor.  Alex pointed and pouted, making Tim crawl over to the bags too.  They almost got the zipper undone by pulling with their teeth but Dean got up and swatted them both gently on the diapers, putting them back into bed.

"I said no."  He stared down at them.  "No weapons at your age.  Not even I got a weapon at your age."  Alex let out a pitiful wail, bringing Missouri.  Who opened the bag and gave Alex the damn gun then went back to her bed.  "He could hurt himself!" he called after her.

"He won't."  She slammed her bedroom door.

"Mama," Alex cooed, patting the gun.  He smiled at Dean, holding it up slightly.  "Mama.  Mamamamamamama!"

"It's a very pretty and good gun," Sam agreed.  "Take the firing pin, Dean."  He broke it down and took the firing pin, earning an outraged squeal of protest.  It was handed back without that crucial part.  Then Sam laid down on one side.  Dean laid down on the other.  Their arms went over the babies and Alex laid there cooing at the gun while Tim snuggled his side and napped again.  "The demons had to do it," he said quietly.

"Mamama," Alex cooed, still petting it.

"They must have.  Even my kid can't be that much of a weapons genius," Dean agreed. "Since he's yours there's no way."

Sam smiled.  "We're going to have to hide the rest from him.  Where's your knife?"  He found it and put it into the bag too.  "Thanks."  Dean climbed back in.  "Sleep, Alex."

He smiled at him, patting it.  "Mama?"

"Yes, you nap with the gun," Dean agreed.  Alex wiggled until he was curled around it, his head on the hammer, cuddling it like his teddy bear.  "My nephew is going to be a gun god," he said with a mean smirk.

"Yeah, well, mine's going to finish the law degree I started," Sam said dryly.

Tim blinked at him then kicked at his cousin so he could sleep.  Alex quit humming in his sleep and snored instead.  Tim put his head back down on Alex's side and let himself fall off again.

Dean snickered.  "They're mini-uses."

"They so are, dude," Sam agreed with a grin.

They had no idea that it'd stay that way alllll the time.

***

Dean opened the door at the rapid pounding, looking at the man on the other side.  "Good, you change worm boy's diaper," he said, handing him the baby in his arms before laying down and putting one arm over his eyes.  "They're horrible."  He knew he was becoming a drama queen but the kids hadn't let him sleep for more than two hours at a time since they'd left Missouri's house two days ago.

John Winchester walked in, kicking the door shut, staring at the thing he had been handed.  "Were his parents taken and we're taking him to Pastor Jim for protection?" he asked finally.

The baby spit at him and cackled, then bounced until John finally put him down onto the dingy carpet.  The baby crawled over to the low bed, wiggling his way up with a helpful boost from John's foot until he could lay down on the shotgun next to his uncle. "Momma," he cooed, petting it while he cuddled it.

Timmy looked over and growled.  "Pa!" he shouted.  John jumped and looked at him.  He smirked and waved.  "Gwap?"

"Who?"

"Dad, meet your grandkids," Sam said blandly, smirking just a bit at the horrified look he got.  "This is Timmy, he's Dean's son.  That's Alex, he's mine.  A demon made them for us and they're going to be sacrificed on their first birthday if I don't do it first."  He handed over his nephew and went to change Alex in the bathroom.  "Eww, how are you getting more worms!" he complained.  He had to dodge being hit by the pee missile but that was standard anymore.  Alex hated his shirts for *some* reason.

"Worms like dogs have?" John asked, looking at the baby in his hands, who was giving him a dissatisfied look.  He walked that way to look.  "That's disgusting."

"The quick care place we took them to said it wasn't worms like tapeworms, it was worms like they had eaten some.  She said they should be gone within a few days of their culinary foray into insects."  He finished cleaning the tiny butt and put a diaper back on, looking at Timmy.  "You need one too?"

He cooed.  "Momma!" he said happily, waving his arms.

Sam sighed.  "Of course you do."  He switched out the babies before his father could protest.  "Make sure the safety's on the shotgun please?  My son's already flicked it off twice."

"It is," Dean called.  He came to grab Alex.  "Come on, nephew."

"Momma!" he said, giving him a hug.

"No, I'm the uncle, Sammy's the momma of you."  He laid down, letting the baby climb up him, trying to drag the shotgun with him.  He looked down at him.  "Love me or the gun, Alex, not both of us this time."  The baby  pouted and kept trying to drag the gun.  Dean sighed and moved it for him, getting a happy baby laying on his chest while petting the gun in his arms.  "Anything so you don't throw another fit.  Last time the cop car pulled us over to complain about your wailing and he didn't like you playing with guns either."

John coughed.  He didn't want to yell....  "How did this happen?" he asked calmly.

Sam looked at him.  "Some demons took our seed from our last dalliance and had them come into being.  They're both seven and a half months old next week by their birth certificates.  We found them in the bag the demon clan that stole them from the original demons to piss them off brought with them."

John rubbed his forehead.  "What?"

Dean looked at him.  "Some demons decided to become cum whores and steal some from our last sex romp.  They implanted them into a witch together and they were born like twins.  They had them until a rival clan stole them and brought them to us to piss the first ones off," he said bluntly.  Then he put his arm back over his eyes.  "Sammy, those stink worse than usual."

"You're the one who fed them onions," Sam complained, going to toss the diapers into the dumpster out back.  He came back and found the babies both curled up with Dean, napping together.  "Want them in the playpen?"

"I'll kiss you if you do.  No tongue but I'll kiss you."

"Sure.  Some day when you're drunk I'll make you do that," he retorted, taking the kids to put down.  The gun went with them because Alex would fuss.  Timmy fussed because it was there but oh well; Tim fussed quieter, he got to be dissatisfied.  He flopped down on his own bed, looking at his father.  "Since they're due to be sacrificed in four months we figured you'd want to help with that, Dad."

John stared at him then at Dean.  Then he burst out laughing.  "Cute joke, guys.  They're really kids you're babysitting, right?"

Dean sat up, staring at him.  "Take a good look at us.  If we were babysitting, would we need showers and sleep this badly?"

Their father quit laughing and stared, then at the kids.  "So they're really your kids?  The smart one's Dean's and the hunter's Sammy's?"

"Sam," Sam muttered.

"Yeah, we had 'em tested," Dean said dryly.  "Sam had a friend of a friend of a friend who could do it for us.  He made sure. Then he joked about reincarnated souls needing stuff they missed in their last lives.  Apparently Timmy needed help with gun stuff and Alex needed to study more."  He flopped backwards again.  "Want to babysit so we can catch a nap, Dad?"

"No."  He looked at the boys then at them.  "We're *sure*?  Positive beyond a doubt?"

"Yup," Sam agreed.  "He works in a small, regional crime lab.  He had their DNA person run it, Dad."

He sighed, sitting down in the room's chair.  "Okay, now what?"

"Blessing," both sons said together.

"Finding the clan that made them and kicking their asses," Dean added as the next step.

"Keeping them safe when their first birthday comes," Sam added.  He got up to put the safety back on the shotgun.  "Do it again, Alex, and it goes back into the trunk."  The baby pouted but cuddled up to the gun again.  He sat down, looking at his father.  "So, Dad, how do you like the grandkids?"

"You're insane."

"It's lack of sleep," Dean said dryly.  "You sure you won't babysit?  Just for a few hours?"

He gave them looks.  "I didn't have any and I managed to survive you two."

"They're like twins, Dad," Sam said.  "I was the only baby then.  Plus Dean helped a lot."

Someone knocked on the door and John got up to get it.  "Yes?"

"They only paid for a double."

"I'm their father.  We were meeting up here."  He went with him to get his own room.  By the time he came back, both fathers were asleep.  Both kids were playing, and Alex had the safety off the shotgun again.  John removed it, smiling when he found it unloaded.  He knew his sons had some sense, even if the kids were driving them insane.  "At least it can't really hurt you unless you dry fire it in your face."  Dean snored and flipped onto his stomach.  Sam batted at something in his sleep.  "I didn't do that."  He picked up the playpen, taking it down to his room.  He guessed he could babysit this once.

***

Dean got the baby out of the back, letting him down when he struggled and fussed.  "Fine!  Don't go anywhere."  The baby took off anyway, crawling past his grandfather's truck on the way into the building.   "He's searching for a/c.  He's spoiled," Dean called at his father's amused look.

"He's stubborn," Sam corrected.  "More than we are together.  That's why he complained and cried for the last hundred miles."  He got Timmy out of the back and followed the other one.

Alex had crawled up to the man talking to a small family in the front pews of the church, using it to pull himself up so he could stare at him.  "Gwap?" he asked brightly, beaming at him.  "Gwap!"

Tim beamed too.  "Gwap!"  He made begging noises and reached out to hold him.

"Sorry, Jim.  They're impatient.  We'll take them downstairs," Sam said, grabbing Alex to carry him off.  "You can see Pastor Jim in a few minutes, boys.  Quit."  They started to scream.  He groaned and glared.  "Stop it," he growled.

Dean walked in and gave them a look.  "Keep it up, go back in the car."  They both quit. "Thank you!"  He took his son.  "Basement meeting hall?"

"It'll let them crawl around safely," Sam agreed, heading down there.  "I still can't translate what 'Gwap' means but they both called him it so apparently it's Pastor Jim's pet name."

"Yay us," Dean said.  "Soon they'll be able to talk for real and we'll never shut them  up."  Alex scowled at him.  "You already babble, nephew.  I've never seen your father do it but you do.  Must be from your mother."  He sat down with a sigh of relief.  Tim went onto the carpeted cement floor.  Alex got put down too.  The boys went to talk to the large picture on the wall by the closet.  Their father came down.  "Their mother must've been just as stubborn as we are.  If not more so."  Tim patted him so he looked down.  "What's up, kiddo?"  He pulled him up to hug, getting a smile and a point at something.  He looked.  "That's an Orthodox cross."  Tim beamed and got down to pet it then went back to babbling at the picture Alex was.

Sam went to look, then found some holy water to banish the demon hiding in it.  He came back to sit down.

"The boys can sense demons?" John asked.  He hadn't seen that skill yet.  He had seen Alex's ability to love any weapon there was.  He'd seen Tim's ability to curl up on a book like a cat to nap on it so Sam couldn't read it.  The laptop he only tipped over so he could nap on the screen, he knew not to nap on the keys somehow.  He had seen their abilities of annoyance, both singly and together.  That was the strongest ability he'd seen in them actually.  No wonder their fathers were insane!  The boys had even annoyed the cop that stopped them into giving the gun back to Alex and walking off muttering about insane children.

"They were created and raised by some until they were taken," Dean reminded him.  Alex pouted, patting the picture.  "No, the demon's gone," he said quietly.  "You can scowl at one later."  The baby pouted at him.  "Don't do that.  You learned that look off your father.  Don't turn into Sammy, Alex."

Alex spit then made a grab for John's back holster, making him grab it to keep the baby from grabbing it.  Alex let off an unholy wail of protest since he couldn't play with his gun.  The pastor came sprinting down.  "Gwap!  Momma!" he complained, pointing at it.

"He likes guns as much as me," Dean said with a grin.  "Dad won't let him play with his.  He won't  play with fake ones either.  Only real ones."  He shrugged.  "We took the firing pin out of one and he wouldn't play with that one either."

"Are we rescuing them?" Jim asked.

"Did you hear rumors about demons taking seed from a few hunters to make kids to sacrifice?" Sam asked.

"Yes, but the hunters who were nearby thought it was a myth.  They couldn't find the clan when they checked.  Why?"  Both boys pointed at the kids.  "They took *yours*?  You have twins?"

"No, we each have one," Dean said dryly.  "The one who likes guns is Sam's son Alex.  The other is my son Timmy.  He'll be the next generation of super-brain college boy."

Sam looked at him.  "I'm sending him to Oxford or Cambridge for that."

"Over your dead body," Dean said dryly, giving him a look.  "No way are our kids getting that far away, bitch."

"Oh, shut up!  They're good schools.  You're being a jerk about it."

"Yay me.  They're still not going to England for college."

"Boys!" John snapped.

"Yes, sir," they muttered, relaxing again.

John looked at his old friend, giving him a smile.  "We need to baptize them.  The demons who made them want to sacrifice them on their first birthday."

"If I don't first," Sam told him.  "I *swear* Alex never sleeps!"

"He naps plenty on my chest or with that one empty shotgun," Dean reminded him.

"Yes but then Tim won't nap."

"Cuddle him more.  He naps on you."  Dean gave him a look.  "They're the mini-uses the next generation but they belong to the wrong father."

"I didn't know you were a Star Trek geek," Sam shot back.  Alex squealed loudly and beamed at them, waving his arms at that.  Tim groaned and gave him a hug, patting him hard until he quit being so happy.

"We're going insane," Dean and Sam told the pastor.

Who nodded.  "I can see why.  Give me a few more minutes, boys.  I saved that family last year."  He went to finish catching up with them.  There wasn't much down there that even toddler Winchester boys could get into.  The church held dinners and things down there so it was toddler proof.  Even if Tim had been petting the various crosses. He watched as one of the boys crawled up the aisle. "How did you get up here?"  The baby beamed and kept crawling, going up to the altar.  He stared for a minute then reached for the silver communion dish.  The pastor smacked him on the hand.  The baby gave him an offended look and reached again.  He smacked it again.  The baby huffed and beat back at him.  "No."  The baby huffed again and made another grab, this time finding a communion wafer, which he nibbled with a smug look.   He crawled off with most of it still hanging out of his mouth.

"How did you get up here!" Sam demanded.  "Communion wafers are not animal crackers, son!"  The baby wailed when he took it.  "Fine, share with your cousin, he could use the blessing anyway!" he sighed, going to the bathroom to throw a mini fit.  He'd had a few of these the last few days.   He really needed to find that demon clan and take this out on them.  Today, he needed to do it today.  He went to get his laptop.  John took it from him.  "I want to find the ones who made him, Dad.  That way I can share the happiness of being a father."  He snatched it back.  Timmy came over to try to help.  He sat him in his lap.  "This is a laptop, Timmy.  Alex can learn how to use one later."  He went back to his prior searches, finding what he needed.  "They're up by Stanford, Dean."

"Charming."  He came over to look.  "That's who gave them to us."  John looked.  "Enemies are....?"

Sam highlighted a few lines.  "Known enemies.  We could ask."

"Once we stomp them for not telling us first," Dean muttered.  Sam grinned at him.  "So we're headed back to Palo Alto."   He sat down and Alex came over to pat him down.  "No, I left my gun in the car.  Ask Granddad if you can play with his."

John gave him a look.  "I don't think so."  Alex let out another wail of protest.  "Stop it," he ordered.  The baby wailed louder.  "Alexander!"  The baby sniffled and let out a louder one, getting Tim into it.  Within seconds they were both loud enough to be heard outside the church.  He groaned, unloading his gun and taking out the firing pin, then handing it over.  Alex pouted at him.  "No way in hell I'm giving you a working gun, kid.  Not until you're old enough to know what not to do with it."  Alex still fussed but he was cuddling the gun.  He gave his grandfather pitiful looks.  He handed him a single bullet from the clip, watching him suck on it.

"Don't let him suck on bullets," Sam complained, taking the bullet from him.  Alex fussed and glared.  Tim glared at him too.  "No putting it in your mouth, Alex."  He reached and struggled to get it back.  Dean snatched it, tossing it back at the baby, who crawled to get it.  "Don't let him suck on it."

"I won't."  He took it the first time it went into the baby's mouth, giving him a look.  "No sucking on bullets."  Alex sniffled but took it back to pet instead, cuddling the gun.  He flopped back down.  "They're very advanced for their age," he said when he saw Jim watching them with an amused look.

"Gwap!" Tim said happily, waving again.

"I have no idea what that means," Sam admitted.  Alex beamed at Pastor Jim too.  "That's Pastor Jim, boys.  Can you try something like that?"

"Gwap!" they said together, both still beaming.

"They're beautiful children, if a bit odd," Jim said, coming in to hug them both.  "Why are we here?"

"Blessing," Dean said to remind him.  "Sanity if you have any left."

Jim smirked. "I've seen many new parents who need sleep and sanity, Dean."

Dean snorted.  "The demons who took them from the original ones pulled in front of and stopped, then handed the kids over and ran after telling us what was going on.  Alex is like a mini ten-year-old me.  Tim is like a mini Sammy.  And my kid is Tim."

John shook his head.  "He handled it so much better when Sam was little," he told his old friend.

"They'll get into a pattern soon," Jim assured him.

Sam looked at him.  "They *hate* riding in the car.  Won't sleep, Tim complains about the music with me.  Alex bops along with his uncle.  It's insane."  Tim patted the laptop and another window opened.  He looked down.  "Nice use of the function keys, Tim."  He closed it and got back to what he was doing.

Dean gave him a lazy grin.  "Wanna babysit?"

"Go shower and nap in the guest room, boys," he ordered.  He got handed Tim as they walked off.  He sat down, smiling at Alex.  "No chewing on the bullet, Alex."  He growled.  He stared the baby down for the growling.  Alex pouted, holding it up with a hopeful look.  "Pet it.  It's a nice bullet.  No chewing on it.  You'll hurt it."  The baby went back to petting it.  "Thank you, good boy."  He looked at Tim, smiling at him.  "Hi, Tim.  Are you a good boy too?"  He beamed and shook his head.  "Why not?"  He pointed at the spilled communion wafers.  "Ah, I see you found more."

"Sam started to put them back up but had to chase him," John said, going to do that.  He didn't put them into the box, he piled them off on another table. "Those kids are somehow wrong, Jim," he said quietly.  "Tim was petting your Orthodox cross.  They found the demon hiding in the picture on the wall.  They're due to be sacrificed on their first birthday.  They're not scared of holy things so it might not bother them to be baptized.  If you can't figure it out we're taking them to Bobby."  He sat down.  Alex came over to coo and pet his leg.  "Thanks, Alex."  He patted him with a small smile.  "You're a good boy, even if you do drive your father and uncle insane."   Alex gave him a wicked grin and went back to playing with the gun.  He looked down the barrel.  "Ah!" he snapped.  "No doing that.  Sit there and pet it.  Or cuddle it," he said at the pitiful sniffle.  "No pulling the trigger or looking down it.  If you do it again I'm putting it in the truck."  Alex pouted but went back to cuddling it.  He looked at the shocked looking minister.  "The first time I saw them Alex was curled up around one of the boys' shotguns.  Unloaded, kept taking the safety off it, wouldn't sleep without it."

Alex held up the gun to the pastor.  "Momma," he said proudly, beaming at him.  "Momma, Gwap!"

"I can see that, Alex.  It's a very pretty gun."  Alex beamed and went back to cuddling it.  They watched as he ended up napping wrapped around it.  "You're right, the boys are odd, but they're Winchesters.  You can see the resemblance, John."

"I did too.  Dean even pulled out the DNA tests they'd done to make sure they were their kids.  Plus, somehow, they had worms."

"We've got stuff for that.  I work with a pediatrician now and then; I'll give him a call to check out the boys."  John grinned at that.  "How long have the boys had them?"

"A week," he said with a wicked smirk.  "This is payback for all the times Sammy got colic and kept us both up."

Jim reached over to pat him on the arm.  "Go take a nap, John."  He grinned and walked over Alex to do that in his truck.  He stared down at Tim, watching him suck his thumb and stare at the laptop.  "Why don't you nap with your brother, Tim?  Then we'll play when you both get up?  I've got to call someone from upstairs.  Can I trust you to be a good boy for five minutes?"  Tim beamed at him.  "Probably not," he sighed.  He put him down anyway and went to make the call, taking the laptop with him.  He came back to find Tim curled around Alex and his gun, petting him as gently as he could.  "That's a good cousin," he decided, sitting down with a few of the children's books from the storage area.  Tim craned his neck so he moved where he could see them, reading to the boys.  It was never too early to start them learning.  Especially with as smart as these two were.

***

A few days and a few less sanity points later, Dean pulled the Impala into a salvage yard, parking and getting out.  He got the screaming kid out and handed him off to Sam, taking the non-fussy one.  "He's yours, you calm him down!"

Sam cuddled him.  "Shh, Alex.  It's all right.  Your uncle won't play 'to hell with the devil' ever again," he said calmly, looking at the older guy who came out of the house.  "Hey, Bobby."

"Boys," he said.  "The Impala broken down or you two searching for help?"

"Help," they said together.  "Please, God, make them stop?" they begged.

"Dad couldn't either," Dean said dryly.  Alex stared at the new guy, head tipped.  Then he leaned over to look into his eyes.  The baby beamed and blew a kiss at his nose then went back to cuddling his daddy.  "Before you can say it, they're not possessed.  They eat communion wafers like animal crackers.  Pastor Jim blessed them Saturday for us.  You missed our kids' baptism by the way."

Sam nodded, leaning against the hood of the car.  "We're looking for information on the demons who want to sacrifice them since they've apparently went into hiding until that point.  Oh, and Alex can tell demons."

Bobby shook his head quickly.  "Let's go inside and get something to drink, boys."

"Please, can I have a beer?" Dean begged.

"As long as you don't drive later," he said, watching them grab a shared diaper bag and head inside.  The one in Sam's arms was trying to get to Dean's back holster, which he saw was empty.  "Dean, you lose your gun?"

"No, I'm not wearing it because Alex thinks it's the greatest teddybear ever," he said grimly.  "We have to keep all the weapons in the trunk or he sets off an unholy racket trying to get them."  They walked into the house and put the babies down under the devils trap painting on the ceiling.  All three adults watched as the babies crawled off.  Alex had spotted a sword.  Tim had spotted the books and candles.  Dean looked at him then pointed.  "The book nerd is my son Tim.  The weapons nut is Sammy's son Alex."

Sam sat down, smiling when Tim tried to drag over a book.  "Leave that one there.  I'm not reading to you in Latin yet."  Tim pouted, petting the book, giving him pitiful sniffles.

"No, you can't have that one," Bobby said firmly.  The baby glared at him, cuddling the book by laying down on it.  "I don't care.  No, you cannot have that book yet."  Tim sniffled louder.

"You cry and you're going back into the car and I'm turning it on AC/DC," Dean warned.  The baby quit.  "Thank you!"  He looked up.  "Thank you for letting me find something that works!"  He looked at the other one.  "Alex, quit licking the sword.  Now."  The baby pouted.  "Tough."

"Son," Sam sighed.  "Come here please."  Alex pouted but crawled over.  He put him between them.  "Sit there for ten minutes."

"That's a bit excessive for him," Bobby said.  "He's too young for a time out to work."

"He'll nap if we can get him to sit still," Sam said, grinning slightly insanely at him.  "Please can they nap?"

"Sure, let me get you boys some tea or something.  And Dean a beer."  He went to do that, spiking them all with holy water, just in case.  He wasn't sure which set was possessed but one of them was.  None of those four out there were right.  The babies took the tea from the sippy cups he had found and loved it.  The two older boys drank their laced beers and sighed in pleasure at the alcohol.  That blew his theory, unless they were very high demons in the hierarchy of hell.  Which, with the way the 'fathers' looked was possible he decided. "Where's John?"

"He said he's staying away in case you try to shoot him again.  Alex might like it too much," Dean said dryly.  Tim came over when Bobby handed him the cup.  "Laced?"  Bobby nodded, giving him a look.  "Thanks.  Needed to make sure anyway."

"Did you hear rumors about some demons taking seed from some hunters to make kids to be sacrificed?" Sam asked.

"Heard the hunters near there went looking and found out it was a myth."

Dean pointed at the baby trying to pet his holster behind him.  "Not really."

Bobby moaned.  "They're *yours*?"  That explained the insanity!  They were *raised* by demons!  It was a taint, not a possession.

"Yup.  Dad's a grandfather and he's cackling almost all the time now," Sam said dryly, saluting him with his beer.  He and Dean clinked bottles then took another drink.  It was fun watching their father go insane thanks to their kids, even if they were slipping too.

Dean got up and grabbed Tim from the bookshelf, bringing him back, handing him to his cousin.  "There, cuddle him.  No more trying to eat the books.  Bad enough you kept eating worms somehow."  He relaxed again, taking another drink.  "They're going to drive us fully insane soon."

Bobby just nodded and smirked.  "Looks like the evil things' plan has worked.  You're already there, Dean."

"Don't tempt us," Sam said with a bright smile.   "We'll leave you and Dad the kids if we get committed."

Dean nodded.  "That'll cure Dad's issues really fast too."  He finished his beer and put it down, taking Sam's to drink.  Sam took his back and finished it, putting the bottle out of the kids' sight as well.  "We need to research what brought them into being.  We have it narrowed down to two choices."  Sam pulled the laptop out of the diaper bag, making Tim beg and reach for it.  "You can play with it later, Tim."  He slumped some more at Bobby's amused look.  "Yes, my son is a research nerd.  Sammy threatened to send him to college in England he's such a big brain."

Bobby snickered.  "I doubt he'd go that far."  He sat down to see what they had.  "Why not the Mcdranish clan?"

"Wasn't mentioned," Sam said.  "Are they recent enemies?  The first ones said something about snatching the kids and handing them to us being suitable payback for killing their females."

"The blue book on the Mcdranish clan.  That was about thirty years ago.  Pastor Jim baptized them?"  Dean nodded.  "They go okay for him?"

"They loved it.  Tim likes to pat Orthodox crosses, they both found a demon hiding in a painting inside the church.  They decided communion wafers were like animal crackers."

"I still think Gwap is their version of trying to say God," Sam offered, typing that name into the search engine he had.  It came up with nothing so he went to get the blue book.

"It's possible," Bobby said.  "Stranger things and all that."  He watched the boys cuddle each other and eventually nap.

Dean looked down and grinned.  "Without a weapon or a book.  I'm so proud, boys," he said quietly.  Sam beamed at him.  He grinned at Bobby.  "Alex will cuddle up to a gun and call it momma.  I don't know why.  He can take a safety off too.  He can also tell when they don't work somehow.  We had to stop him fussing at Dad for doing it to him."  Bobby groaned.  "I don't know if there's maybe a past life, if the demons had them possessed for a little while and they picked it up, we have no clue.  Jim thought it was the second."

"Either could explain that," Sam reminded him.  "My friend joked about reincarnated souls who needed more experience in the areas they were weak in last life.  Apparently they're weak in the father's area."  He sat down with the book, flipping to the right section.  "Daylight attacking."

"Unusual," Dean said, leaning over to see it.  Alex snuffled his armpit so he gave him a look.  "I know, you wouldn't let me get a shower without you helping," he said dryly, going back to reading.  He looked down to find Alex sucking on his arm. "That's not a pacifier."  Sam found one and handed it over.  He plugged the gaping hole and the baby was happy with that.

"Do they eat strange things?  I'd expect it with being raised by demons for seven months."

"Worms," the father said together, getting a laugh.

"They only quit crapping them last night," Dean complained.

"When's their birthdays?  I'll look it up to see if it's got an importance."

"Same day, Yule," Dean said, giving him a look.  Bobby shuddered.  "Their mother was a pure human witch if that helps.  The demons who stole them from the making ones told us they hadn't seen any other humans there."

"So we'll see," Bobby decided, going to look up that date in relation to demonic observations and sacrifices.  A few minutes after he sat down he felt something against his ankle and looked down.  "Which one are you again?"

"Tim," Dean called.  "Let Bobby read without your help."  He looked down.  "Never mind, that's Alex.  Huh."  He frowned.  "Alex, you don't usually like books."

Alex beamed at Bobby, letting him pick him up.  He stared at the books and patted one, beaming at him again while he petted it.  "Gwap!"

"Okay.  We'll start there," he decided, opening that one.  Alex helped him turn pages as carefully as he could until he finally put his head down.  "Do we maybe think the boys are a bit psychic?" he called, reading the section once he had moved the small head.  "Huh.  What part of the world are those demons from, Sam?"

"Ireland."

He went back to reading, smiling at the boy.  "That's a good job.  Thank you."  He gave him a squeeze and the boy beamed at him, patting the other book.  He let him find the spot for him, laughing when he found another spot and took a nap on top of it.  "Looks like we need to have them blessed by their mother's people too, boys."  They both shrugged.  "That's a good night for it."

"Fall equinox is between the two," Sam pointed out.  "If we could find a good, strong coven of white witches we'd talk to them."

"Any idea who their Momma was?" Bobby asked.

"Not listed on the birth certificate.  The person who did the DNA testing said she didn't come up," Sam said quietly, looking over at him.  "Which means she's never been arrested for something serious."

"Most serious nature witches won't be," Bobby agreed.  He looked at the boy staring at him, grinning down.  "What mischief do you have planned, Alex?  Your dad used to get into all sorts of trouble playing with the old cars."  Alex beamed at him.  "I know, don't give him any ideas," he said at the whimpering father.

"Too late."  Sam looked at his son.  "You're staying inside or going back to the car."

Bobby laughed at the pout Sam got for that statement.  "You boys need to stay for a few days?"  They nodded.  "Got somewhere for them to sleep?"

"They usually sleep with us, they hate motel cribs," Dean said.  He looked down at Tim.  "Thank you for napping, son.  I'm very proud."  He got up to find another beer.  Sam took it to gulp half on his way past but that was fine.  "Jim said he's never seen babies as bright as them before.  He's not sure why.  All we know is we're slowly going insane.  Day by day...."

"Like the sands of the hourglass," Sam muttered.  Dean turned to glare at him.  "What?  Tim was watching it yesterday!"

Dean pointed.  "See.  It's not just me."

"Go take some target practice, Dean.  Remember to use a silencer."  He nodded, going to do that.  Bobby and Sam had to keep Alex from following, making him howl.  Dean came in and grabbed the baby, carrying him off to play with him since he was up.  He'd sit there and watch his uncle in awe.   Bobby laughed at them.  Alex was sitting beside Dean patting the box of shells.  When Dean needed a few he'd look down and grin and Alex would hold them up for him.  "He's very bright."

"He's abnormally bright and I think the demons did something to make sure of it," Sam said quietly.

Bobby looked at him, nodding a bit.  "You'd probably be right.  More power to 'em when they died."  Sam grimaced.  "Let me call someone to see if they know more about this.  I've got a friend of a friend who has more books.  He's a Watcher."  Sam shuddered; they all hated dealing with them.  "I know but he's not a bad sort and his mistress is my favorite waitress at the local bar."  He went to call her.  She gave over the number when she found out why he wanted it.  "Dave, Bobby Singer.  Yeah, at the salvage yard.  No, need some of your expertise I think.  Dave, cut the shit, we both know what the other does," he said dryly.  "Even if I was tryin' ta hide it, Dorothy would've told you."  The other guy whimpered at that.  "Why am I calling?  Cousins born as twins on Yule," he said bluntly.  "Extremely bright.  Created by some demons as a sacrifice on their first birthday from the seed of hunters."  He laughed.  "Yeah, that one sounds 'bout right.  No one picked it outta the books for me."  He smirked.  "That'll work, thank you.  Home.  With them and their daddies.  No, they were born to hunters. Thanks.  We'll be here."  He hung up.  "He'll do a fast search and come over with whatever prophecy this is."  Tim scowled at him.  "You quit and go help your Dad shoot targets."  Tim scowled but crawled out there at Sam's urging so Sam could have the couch to himself for a bit.  "Sure, you nap," Bobby said dryly.

"I swear we couldn't have been that bad."

"Nope.  If you had your dad would've bathed you in holy water every day."

"Nothing holy bothers them," he said grimly.  "Or else we would've done that already."  He looked at the older man.  "We're slowly going insane with them not being right."

"It'll be fine, Sammy.  You rest."  He went back to his research.  The two passages the boy picked out were very interesting but he needed to see if there was something more pertinent to the present crisis.  That one looked like it was next year on second reading.

***

Dave, the Watcher from up the road, tapped then walked in.  "Bobby?" he called.

"Kitchen.  Boys are in the living room, watch out, they're mobile."

"As I suppose children should be at their ages."  He closed the door, coming into the living room.  He stared at one, especially when the baby stared at him.  "Oh, damn," he said quietly.  Both fathers hopped up to stare at him.  He pointed.  "He's Alexander Harris.  He's been missing from Sunnydale now for sixteen months.  Taken by vampires."  He stared at the fathers, who were both glaring worse.  "He hunted with the slayer, boys."  Dean turned and slammed his fist into the door.  "Let me find a way to see who the other one was.  They must've pulled these souls on purpose to make the sacrifice stronger."  He went to find something in a book he was sure Bobby had, coming back to light a candle and do a quiet chant, smiling at the baby when his past life was revealed.  "Hello, Timothy."  He patted him on the head.  "We'll fix this, love.  I promise we will."  He blew out the candle.  "He wasn't a hunter, he was a scientist.  A criminalist."  Dean gave him an odd look.  "Like the show on tv, gentlemen."

"He was a CSI type?" Dean asked.  "Then why is he *my* son?"

"Let me research his life a bit.  That's all I got."

"Gwap," Alex said to Tim, who nodded.

"Also, they should be older.  That's half the problem at the moment.  The spell that called their spirits warped when it was done."  He sat down at the laptop.  "Can you get me online?"  Sam came over to do that.  "You shouldn't know how to do this with the Watcher's database."  He got into it, making a note in the Harris boy's file.  He got an outraged administrator for it, typing in a more detailed account.  He got pointed at the right section for the prophecy and the rest of the system was locked out.  He saved down the prophecy for them but left it open.  Then he went searching for the boy's true name.  It came up with an article about his death, letting Sam see it.  "That's who he was."

"Gwap," Tim agreed, smiling at Alex.  Who nodded back.

"Gwap?  When did you two see him?" Dave asked, looking confused.

"We thought that's how they were saying God," Dean said, looking confused right back.

"No, Gwap is a truly unusual guardian angel.  He doesn't let anyone know his former name but he says that his first charge named him Gwap because he couldn't say his name.  He's guarded a slayer in recent history."  Alex beamed at him.  "Does he guard you two?"  Tim beamed at him and waved.  "Oh, damn."  He looked at them then at Bobby.  "There's another complication.  The spell that brought them into these bodies was warped.  They should be about five or six from what I can tell."

"That explains why they're so smart and ahead of themselves," Dean said, thinking about it, watching the kids.

"Can we fix it?" Sam asked.

"Not until they're past the sacrifice.  Otherwise they could be killed in that nanosecond that they're a year old."

Both fathers nodded.  "Then we take out the demons that want to hurt our kids, no matter who they were their last life.  Or whatever."

"Last life," Dave said.  "As they age they'll forget their last lives."

Sam tapped in something and came up with the incident report for why Tim had died.  It wasn't classified and the coroner's inquest was sure about the cause.  "He didn't clean his gun," he said quietly, letting Dean see.  "Someone put them with their weaker areas for their fathers.  I'm having that friend checked for being psychic."

"Then Alex used to be a smartass with weapons?" Dean asked him, looking at the Watcher.

"We hated Harris.  Loathed him to no end for jumping into the Slayer's duties and dragging a witch with him."  They gaped.  "But yes, he did blow up his high school to stop an ascension.  He did bring the slayer back to life, leading to two of them being around.  He did hand her a grenade launcher so she could blow up the Judge in the middle of a mall to save humanity.  You might say that," he finished sarcastically.

"So academics and he didn't get along?"

"He had a solid D average at the time he graduated," Dave said bluntly.  "He had to beg for the one that kept him from not being at graduation."  That got a nod from Sam.  "As to why he died?"  He opened another site and let them read it.  "Someone in that group decided to split our present older slayer from her support network.  They paid the vampires who took him.  They found out about the payment after they took them down and destroyed them to the very last person and demon in there.  The demons had been tortured and isn't some great loss, but Buffy snapped when she learned she was dating the man who orchestrated that move.  He died with the others.  She went catatonic for six weeks.  Fortunately the hellmouth stayed fairly quiet while she rested.  The witch kept it mostly closed.  Her girlfriend was knocked out of her body about eight months ago.  Miss Maclay was also a witch.  She's still out of her body.  We knew something was wrong with her because she'd disappear out of a guarded, warded room suddenly for no reason and be brought back ten hours later.  Still unconscious."

"They'll be eight months in another week," Sam said quietly.

"That's probably what knocked her out.  They thought someone was using her and no matter what they tried Rupert and Willow could not stop it."  He shifted to look at Bobby.  "They'll be fine but the demon threat must be taken out first.  They're in danger until it is.  Then we can figure out how to age them to their correct ages.   Whether they turn out to be hunters is up to their fathers after that."  He stood up.  "I've left the prophecy open in case it didn't save.  The Council administrator was *not* amused when I told him why I was accessing Harris' file.   He was even less amused when I told him the prophecy was being carried out.  You may have more support from Harris' former friends and those like him.  I do not know."

"Can they locate the clan?" Sam asked.  "They're in hiding because they know we're going to destroy them."

That got a nod.  "We do have those who search out certain clans to track them.  Which one?"  Sam showed him what they had.  He tapped.  "That's the one who made him come into being.  The others don't use magic even if it is for the right reason.  Then again, about eight hundred years ago they created that rift because they went to eat the other clan's females.  Fairly large demonic brouhaha in Germany at the time.  Nearly destroyed the whole country.  Did destroy most of the wine country that year.  They called it a blight."  He shrugged.  "We do what we must to cover those things up."  He looked at Sam then at Dean.  "Should I hear something I'll contact Bobby for you, boys.  I do wish you good hunts and a safe place to keep them while you hunt that clan.  They're not exactly pleasant to deal with."  He nodded at Bobby, then smiled at the boys.  "Xander, I'll let them know you've went onto a better place.  That way they quit worrying."  The baby smiled at him.  "You tell that guardian angel of yours to behave.  He keeps interfering in Council business and Travers is most pissed at him, again.  Last time he tried to have him summoned so he could trap him and eliminate him."  He left the house.

"Wow," Sam said, shaking his head.

Bobby laughed.  "They hate dealing with us normal folk.  They old enough to eat real food?"

"The baby food's in the truck," Dean said, rubbing his forehead.  "I don't know why Dad did that."  He texted that to him.  Then he came in to look at dinner.  "They can suck on hamburgers.  They have mine in the past and Sammy's salad."

"Good enough."  He shooed him out, going back to cooking.  That had been a lot of information and they needed time to sort it out.  He brought out plates and the boys picked up their kids to let them pick off their plates.  Alex howled in frustration.  "Let him eat, Dean."

"I'm not trying to stop him."  He groaned, looking at his nephew.  "What?"  Alex wiggled so he put him down.  "Fine, we'll get you some mush later."  He watched as the baby crawled over to Bobby and pulled himself up, giving him a pouty look until he got picked up. Then he face-planted into the burger on Bobby's plate, making Sam and Tim laugh.  "Oh, I see.  You don't like onions.  Sure."  He let Bobby have his plate and took the other one and the baby back.  Alex was still nibbling on it from the top down.  Sam was snickering quietly.  He glared at him.  "He's your son."

"I know that.  Poor kid."  He looked at Tim, who was eating his fries.  "Those good, Tim?"  Tim waved one and ate it.  "Sure, you do that."  He looked at Bobby.  "He squealed at the music Taco Bell was playing the other night."

"They don't like good music," Dean complained.  "Alex can stand some of mine but not others.  They'll listen to pop but not the bigger pop twits that make you have hives.  Alex will listen to country but Tim wails if you try it around him.  They'll both listen to older classic rock or dance music.  It's insane.  I put on AC/DC and Tim threw an unholy fit in the car.  Alex hates some of their stuff."

"Alex likes a lot more of the newer Metallica than the older," Sam agreed.  "The _Nothing Else Matters_ or _Turn the Page_ era instead of the older stuff Dean likes."

"Some of which gives me hives," Dean shot back.

"The kids are not happy in the car."

"Though now and then Alex does go 'whee' when I pull out of the gas station," Dean said, cracking Bobby up.  "Tim gives him this look like he's insane."

"Tim likes you going faster.  It makes him sleepy," Sam offered.  "The night you got up over ninety was nice.  They slept through the music they hate."

Bobby snickered.  "All kids hate stuff their parents do, boys."

"Yeah but they hate *everything*," Dean complained.

Bobby grinned. "Your dad used ta complain that you boys hated his choice in music too."

Dean shrugged.  "I did not.  Not that much.  Only the country stuff when he was depressed."  Alex belched so he looked down.  "Not allowed.  Apologize.  Have some manners or those girls you hit on will never let you do more than flirt, nephew."  Alex just beamed at him.  "Say excuse me."

"Pa!" he said, smiling at Timmy, who waved a fry.  He scowled at him.  "Papapa!"  Tim ate another one and grabbed at the burger piece Sam had torn off for him, nibbling it.  Alex beamed at him.

"Alex is overprotective of his cousin already?" Bobby teased.

"God yes," Sam said, shaking his head. "It's like us junior some days.  Only less mouthy.  Alex hits on waitresses.  Tim scowls at him for it.  They give us nicely sized portions when he does it.  Dean gets told how cute the boys are so the girls go for him.  It's been insane."

Dean nodded.  "He's hitting on the girls who won't sleep with me because I have him.  Then again, half the motel owners think we're really sick now.  Before it was 'are you two gay boys' and now it's 'you two aren't gonna hurt those kids, right' questions.  I about smacked the first one."

"I did punch one that flat out told me we had kidnaped the kids," Sam admitted.  Dean smirked at him.  "In front of the cop he called to tell that.  Then I looked at the cop and said my nephew wouldn't sleep for the last day and a half.  He understood.  We've been explaining it as the great family road trip after our girls dumped us with the kids."

"Probably for the best," Bobby agreed.  "Can't wait to see the Impala with the 'my kid's an honor student' bumper sticker on it."

Dean snorted.  "No bumper stickers on my car."

"Home schooling," Sam agreed.  "Always on the honor roll.  No bullies but Dean."

"We have to figure out what we're teaching them," Dean pointed out.

"There's some good systems.  We'll see which one is the easiest to keep track of and add in other classes along the way, like weapons and Latin, or maybe another language if they want."  Someone knocked on the door so he looked back.  "It's a female, Bobby.  You sure you don't want us to clear out?"

"It's gotta be business boys, haven't had that pleasure in a few months."  He went to talk to her, getting her a copy of the receipt she said she needed.  She skipped off happier and he came back to find Alex trying to steal his dinner.  "Hey now.  Already got the burger, kid."  He ate a larger bite and Alex pouted.  "You sure they're with the right father?"

Both boys nodded.  "DNA doesn't lie very often," Dean said dryly.  Alex stared at a corner, starting to growl.  Tim looked that way, looking concerned.  Then he started to growl.  Alex tried to get down but Dean handed him to Sam and grabbed a weapon to check it with Bobby.  A shot later and Sam leaned out the doorway.  "We're fine.  Demon dog."  He looked at the baby.  "Oh, no."  He picked Tim up.  "I know you're my son but you don't need to see the dead demon dog."  They heard a shot inside and went to check on Alex, who had tried to shoot at the ghost floating through the walls.  "Good job, nephew!" he said dryly.

"Not really," the ghost said.  "I'm not a harmful one.  He shouldn't shoot at me."  She looked at him.  "Naughty you."

"Tata!" he shouted, jumping up and down on the couch.  "Tata!"  He held up his arms.

She floated closer.  "Such a good boy, Alex."  She stroked over his head.  "My good boy."

"You're their mother?" Sam asked calmly.

She smiled and nodded.  "I am.  They're good boys."  She smiled at Tim.  "Hi, Tim."  He beamed and waved.  "Such a good boy too."  He crawled closer and they sat down to talk to each other, blocking out the fathers.  The boys fell asleep next to her and she smiled at the adults once her shield was removed.  "Alex always was a bit hyper.  Watch out for him on chocolate."  She floated up to look at them.  "They'll be fine."

"Will you be okay?" Dean asked.  "We heard you're out of your body."

She nodded.  "I am.  I'll be back sometime soon.  Willow's working on it."  She winked at him.  "You cannot bring him back to Sunnydale.  Ever.  Never ever bring him back there.  Tim either.  Or Cleveland later on when we head there.  No hellmouths for either of them once they start losing their memories.  Though Willow will be helping with the getting them to the right age spell."  She smiled at Sam.  "It'll be okay.  They'll be very close when they get older.  As close as you two were as teenagers."

Sam blushed and coughed.  "You knew us then?"

"No, but Gwap told me."  She winked at Dean then smiled at Bobby.  "Someone has to be a godparent and protect them if something happens."

"Of course we will."

"Good.  Try to stop their daddy from turning them so blatantly into soldiers this time?  They both were isolated a bit their last lives and this time they'll never trust anyone.  It'll turn them a bit *too* close."  He nodded at that hint.  "Thank you."  She smiled, floating closer to him.  "Gwap likes you to take over some of his special assignments some day.  You might want to think about it just in case you get poked with the pointy stick of duty."

He nodded.  "I'll consider that.  Thank you, ma'am."

"Tara."  She stroked his cheek.  "Willow will help and there's a coven in Louisiana.  My mother's coven.  They'll bless the babies and the one who guards them when the parents can't.  Tell John I said so.  His is nice but my mother's people are safer.  One of the ones he knows is dangerous.  They can help.  Willow won't mind."  She faded out.

"Okay," Dean said, looking at the boys.  They were curled together to nap.  Then he looked at Bobby.  "Not the usual visit."

"She's not the usual spirit, she's still alive," Sam pointed out, still thinking.  "Can we find her with what she gave us, Dean?"

"I don't know, can we?"

Sam went to his laptop to get into the files on Xander's former life the Watcher had left up.  "Yeah, we can.  Her name is Tara Maclay.   She went to UC Sunnydale."  He got into that server on another window, finding her listed and her hometown.  "We have a hometown."  Dean came to look, texting that to his father's phone.  They looked at Bobby.

"Sure, I don't mind.  Be something to do this week.  Think they'll know about the demon clan?"

"I think so," Dean said.  "If not, this Willow might."

"The white witch to the slayer?  She should," John said as he walked in, handing over the bag of baby food.  "Forgot I had packed that."  He looked at the boys.  "You finally got them to sleep without a weapon?  I'm proud."

"Their mother showed up," Dean told him.  He checked the shotgun then unloaded it, handing Bobby the shells.  "How did he fire that old thing?"

"His foot," Sam said, pointing at the traces of powder on the white socks he was wearing.  Dean looked then groaned, shaking his head.

"He fired...." John started then shook his head.  "Never mind."  He looked at Bobby.  "Coming with us?"

"Sure.  She said I could be a godparent.  So did the boys."

"Works for me too," John agreed.  "We heading tonight?"

"I can find the coven and call," Sam said.  "Equinox is soon."  He found a magic shop listed near the same town and called.  "Hi, this is Sam Winchester.  We have the sons that Tara Maclay gave birth to and she came to us to tell us to have her mother's coven bless them," he said.  He smiled.  "Good, that saves some explaining.  We were hoping the next sabbat.  Because they're part of a sacrificial prophecy.  Thank you."  He hung up.  "We can, equinox is in a week."

Dean calculated the distance.  "We can do that and have an extra day if we leave in the morning."  Everyone nodded and the boys took the kids to sleep in their room while they got some rest, finally, of their own.

John looked at Bobby, shrugging a bit.  "Dean called up the Roadhouse with a totally hysterical sounding message to have me meet them on the way to Jim's place or else.  I thought they were in real trouble.  Then I met the boys and realized how sad it is that my grandsons' best ability is annoyance and driving their parents insane."

Bobby snickered.  "Those boys are something else and we found some stuff, including they're supposed to be older and they have a past life.  I know the mistress of a Watcher."  John grimaced.  "They knew the prophecy, who they were, and left us information."

"Good!  Who were they?"  He let him see, getting a small smile for who both boys had been before.  "They'll lose it?"

"Tara said so, so did Dave."

"Good.  This age thing?"

"The skills they show should be around five or six by Dave's thoughts."

"Interesting.  Okay."  He looked around then at him.  "The demon clan?"  Bobby changed to that screen, letting him read it over.  "Very interesting.  We'll handle that for the boys since it looks like they're presently in Sunnydale."

"She said to never let them go back there.  Or Cleveland for some reason."

"That's fine.  There's got to be a reason when a spirit says stuff like that."  He frowned.  "Cleveland?"

"Don't know why."

"Sure."  He went back to reading the prophecy.  They were picky things sometimes.  "He really shot at the ghost?"

"We were outside killing the demon dog.  He really shot at the ghost."  He patted him on the back.  "She also said if they turned them as militant as Dean is, they'd be cousin- marrying boys too."  He went to his room while John groaned.

"As long as we can train them somewhat," he said.

Dean came to the doorway.  "Of course we can.  We just have to teach them they can trust others sometimes."  He went back to his bed.  "Night, Dad."

"Night, son."  He went to crash on the couch.  They had some hard driving and some thinking ahead of them.

***

Sam found the herb shop he had called, walking Timmy inside.  He put the baby down, watching him toddle toward the witch at the counter.  He grinned.  "He learned that last night.  Taunted Alex all night until we made them nap."  He looked around.  "We were told to meet Marian here today?"

"You must be on of the Winchester boys," she said, staring at the baby staring at her.  "Mom's at the store.  It'll be a few.  Don't eat that.  It'll give you the runs, kid."

"Tim."  The baby beamed at him.  "Don't eat the herbs unless we give them to you."  Dean walked Alex inside, putting him down.  He ran over to pounce his cousin, beaming at him.  "Good job, son."

"He wanted down outside and dove until I let him.  Then he got to his feet against me and ran."  Dean looked around then at him.  "Now what?"

"Marian's at the store," Sam told him.

"Cool with us.  Boys, let's get a burger," he called.  Tim spit at him.  "Yes, even you, son."  He picked them both up, taking them with him to the place up the street.  He was even nice enough to give them cookies too.  He noticed a woman that looked a bit...off to him so he followed her back to the shop.  "Hey."

"You had to give them sugar?" Sam demanded.  "They're already hyper."  Both boys spit at him.  He scowled.  "Don't start today."  Alex cackled, eating his cookie.  "Alex, even my patience has a limit, especially after last night and your bra diving."

"They're peanut butter.  Not chocolate," Dean defended.  Alex had an unnatural attraction to chocolate.  Even stole his.  They had fought over some peanut M&M's the other day, which he had lost for some reason.  Then his nephew had turned into a holy terror, demon on crack, from the sugar rush.  Another woman walked in and he nodded.  "Hi."

"Boys.  Ah, and Tara's sons."  The strange woman stiffened and glared at the boys.

"Try it, demon," Sam said in Latin.  She backed off, nodding politely at him.  He looked at the other woman.  "Thank you for helping us."

"Not a problem.  Heather, there's a case in the back."  She took the other woman back there to get it and let her out the back door.  "She's a peaceful sort."

"Some demons are wary of the boys," Sam admitted.  "It's like they can tell."

"We all can, they radiate," she agreed, smiling at him.  "Are they having cookies for lunch?"  Dean held up the bags.  "They should have cookies *after* the food."

"The cookies are a bribe so they behave," Dean told her.  "Otherwise we'd have to rebuild the store."

"That worked on mine as well."  She brought them back into a study area, shutting the door.  "They'll be safe in here."  Dean handed the boys their lunches, watching as Tim scowled at his.  "It's chicken, dear."  He scowled at her.  She sighed.  "It's from a very clean kitchen, it's organically raised around here, and they're good people."  Tim nibbled on it.  Alex gave him a long look.  He held that one out.  Alex scowled just like his daddy so Tim huffed and went back to eating.  "Was he a vegetarian in his last life?"

Sam shrugged.  "Don't know, it never said.  He'll eat burgers.  He doesn't like to eat anything really."

"They'll be better as they get older," she promised, smiling at them.  "So, just a blessing?"

"They've been baptized by a pastor we work with now and then," Dean admitted.  He sat down so he could watch the kids.  Tim gave him a smile.  "Eat it first, then I'll read you something, Tim."  Tim stuffed his mouth.  Alex growled and moved closer.  "I'll help him if he chokes, Alex.  Eat your own lunch.  Let us worry about Timmy."  Alex pouted but did that.  He looked at the amused witch.  "It's always like this.  Only usually there's weapons involved."

She giggled.  "I heard they were supposed to be older."

Sam nodded.  "So the Watcher that found the prophecy said."

"What are your plans after this?"

"Destroying the clan that hurt your friend's daughter and made our sons," Dean said bluntly.  "Then we'll fix the age issue and look at what else is supposed to happen."

She nodded.  "While I don't condone destruction in this case I believe it's a reasonable cause."  She stood up to call someone.  "We can gather the ladies tonight to bless them," she said once she was back.

"If you wanted to wait for the equinox, we wouldn't care," Sam offered.  She smiled at that.  "I know some witches won't do anything right before a rite or a sabbat."

"We're a strong little group.  It'll be fine.  Plus we'll have Willow with us."  She winked at Dean.  "Ignore her.  She does babble.  She's very brilliant but she's also quite angry about this.  The babbling is stronger because of the anger."

"We were warned to keep the boys out of Sunnydale," Sam said quietly.

"Good!  I encourage that one even if they don't have a destiny."  She looked around.  "Just you two?  No guardian or teacher?"

"Our dad and one of his friends are arranging for rooms at the boarding house," Dean admitted.  She smiled at that.  "Why don't we take these two there and you guys can call us when you're ready?"

"That would be acceptable."  They nodded, grabbing the boys, letting Dean eat the remainder of their lunches for them on the way back to the car.

A redheaded girl peeked in.  "They're adorable."

"They are.  They're also very strong.  Alex is a very good protector of his cousin."

She beamed.  "He did to me too."  She bounced off to help with the shop.  She knew what certain things were and someone had mixed up some of the herbs.

Marian went to help her.  The girl was one big ball of energy.  She needed to learn patience.  Somehow her goddaughter hadn't taught her patience.

***

Dean walked in and put Alex down, letting him walk off to suck up to Bobby again.  "We're back."

"Figured that since I'm getting cuddled," Bobby said dryly.  "Hi, Alex.  Where's your cousin?"

"Sam's outside walking Tim.  He's got an upset stomach.  Ate too fast."  He sat down on the bed.  "Our room?"  Bobby tossed over a key.  "Crib, or should we find the playpen in the car?"

"Probably should," he agreed.  Dean went to do that and grab their bags for the night.  Bobby looked at the baby.  He was yawning and cuddly.  It was a nice change from the usual hellion he was.  "You go ahead and nap, Alex.  You can even use my bed like a big boy."  He put him down and watched him cuddle the pillow.  "Good boy."  He patted him gently on the hip then went back to his reading.  Sam and Tim walked past the door, he heard the fussing.  "Pepto," he called.

"Did, thanks," Sam called back.  He put the baby down and let him fuss at him.  "Alex is in with Bobby probably."  Tim beamed at that so he went to put him down next to Alex, making Alex sigh in pleasure as he wrapped himself around his cousin.  Tim fell asleep too.  "Yell when they wake up?"

"Sure.  Go rest."  Sam beamed and went to do that.  The kids were still sleeping odd hours at night.  Bobby shook his head.  "This is why I don't need more kids."  John came in, giving the boys on the bed an odd look.  "Alex was tired."

"At least Tim's not screaming now."  He sat down in a chair, looking at the boys.  "The locals seem pretty nice."

"Should be.  Especially if the coven's a nice bunch."  Alex kicked at him.  "You quit."  The baby stopped and wrapped it back over his cousin's body.  He shook his head, going back to his reading.  "Anything good in the shop?"

"A whole section of books and one bouncy redhead that nearly pounced me to talk to me."

Sam opened the door and leaned in.  "That was probably Willow."  John nodded.  "Bobby, the local store did have a lot of demonology books and Willow said she worked at a place in Sunnydale that has even more.  Run by a Watcher."  Bobby went to go look.  He could use more books.  "She's just pounced Dean and asked to make sure we're not sleeping together."  He closed the door on his father's horrified look.  Then he went to lay down.  He deserved a nap.  He really did.  Two demented kids and Dean was sucking his sanity out his nose most of the time.  Today hadn't been a fun salvo in the music wars in the car so it had been worse than usual.  He pulled the covers over his head, ignoring Willow babbling at Dean totally as he fell asleep.

"He seems kinda uptight, is he all right?" she asked him.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, the kids didn't like the music today and wouldn't let him sleep."

"Oh.  Well, I know what Xander used to like.  I brought his tape and CD collection," she offered hopefully.  "The rest of his stuff is in storage.  Including the weapons."

"You guys don't need them?"

"Well, yeah, but we don't need what he uses often.  He collected stuff that isn't really practical in Sunnydale.  You can only carry a flame thrower so often.  They're heavy."

"I guess they would be," he agreed, grinning some.  "Sure, it might stop some of the music wars.  Anything on Tim's former life?"

"A little bit.  I hacked down there.  He was very tight with his people.  He did his masters degree in one year instead of two or three.  Got honors too.  He was the earlier version of me," she said with a smile.  "Only supposedly snarky and mean now and then."

Dean nodded.  "We don't mind smart mouths as long as they have manners now and then."

She giggled.  "Good luck with that.  Xander didn't get a whole lot of home training except for when my mom tried."  She hugged him then beamed at him.  "If Tara had to have kids on me I'm kinda glad it's you guys and it's Xander reborn.  Even if he won't remember us.  He's too special to lose to the world."  She bounced off again, going to get him the stuff she had brought.

Dean sat down to recover the energy she had sucked from him.  He'd seen Sam on a sugar rush.  He'd seen Xander on a sugar rush.  She was *so* much worse!  She didn't even have the excuse of a sugar rush or chocolate like he, Sam, or Xander had.  She bounced back an hour later and handed him a bag.  He looked inside.  "He can't wear the clothes yet."

"I know but for when he's older.  Those were his two favorite outfits and they'll be just as out of date then as they are now."  She beamed and handed over a smaller bag.  "This is his music collection."  He looked at the CD's.  "In the bag is a cassette adaptor for the CD player you can put on the dashboard."  She gave him another hug.  "There you go.  Ooooh, Timmy used to ride a Ducatti."  He looked clueless.  "That's a racing bike.  All the earlier pictures I found of him online were of a grunge CSI with a 'tude as the person I found down there told me while she was drunk."  She beamed and bounced out again.  "See you guys tomorrow night!"

Dean blinked as the door shut behind her.  He found the CD player and the plug that let it run from the cigarette lighter.  "Sweet of her," he decided.  He flipped through the music, smiling at some of them.  "Comedy.  Country he'll make Tim wail with.  Real music.  Emo chick angst music Sammy might like."  He blinked at a few things but he guessed the kid had issues with great music.  Why he had a single Disco CD he wasn't sure.  He put it into the player and put on the headphones he found, giggling when he found out what it was.  Labeling it disco kept his former best friends out of his porno soundtrack music.  He put it up and checked the rest of the bag.  Two guns.  A broken down machine gun.  He pulled it out to put together, having to dig for the spring but that was fine.  He looked at it once it was done, nodding a bit.  Xander had good taste in his weapons.  He took it back apart and put it back into the bag.  "We should check his gear and store it somewhere safer."  He put the bag beside theirs and laid down.  They needed a nap before the boys woke up.  He was just starting to drift off when he heard the wail.  "Damn it," he muttered.  He went to get the kids, bringing them back to sleep next to him.  That way he could have a nap too.

Tim and Alex laid there staring at each other, holding a silent conversation.  Tim blinked hard then got down and went to crawl in with his momma.  Alex settled in next to his momma and it was fine with them again.  Bobby didn't cuddle like the mothers did.

***

Dean stopped Willow on the way out of the celebration.  "His stuff is going where?"

"We called the nice pastor John told us baptized him.  He said he had a storage area for you guys so we didn't have to deal with the weapons being stolen by some demon some night when they were being fussy."  She pinched him on the cheek.  "All his stuff is going there.  Even the stuff Anya didn't want to give up."

"Anya?"

"His last girlfriend, Anyanka.  She's human again," she said at his horrified look.  "We accidentally broke her power center after she made an alternate universe."  She beamed at him and bounced off again.

Sam walked the boys over.  "Is she always that bouncy?"

"Apparently," Dean agreed.  He looked at Sam.  "We have new music too."

"Will Tim wail or will I?" he asked dryly.

"Depends on which CD."  He got them out to the Impala, smiling at the two older guys being babbled at by Willow.  "Willow, that demon clan?"

"They're heading to Miami for some reason.  They're moving slowly so they're somewhere in Missouri.  Probably trying to track the boys.  Where were they handed over?"

"Just over the Kansas border," Sam admitted. "About an hour outside Joplin, Missouri."

"Hmm.  Is that in the southern part of the state or the northern?"

"Southern," Dean said.  He found the map for her.  She pointed at something.  "They're there?"

"We found a scout there.  They only scout where they're staying for more than a week."  She looked at him.  "So they're somewhere around there."  John came over to look.

"We've heard there've been a few deaths around that area."  He pointed at something.  "There."

She looked then shook her head.  "No, there's a small vampire clan there."  She traced a path.  "They were following this highway the last time I knew."

"That's a good place to start," John agreed.

She looked at them.  "Who's going to watch them while you guys destroy the demons?  Because you know, I can babysit.  I'm really pretty good at it and it'd be educational for them in a fun and good for kids way."

John grinned.  "We'll figure it out, Willow."  Because he wasn't letting a witch babysit his only grandchildren.  Ever.  Not that she wasn't nice but he'd heard things about her attitude toward her powers and she was a bit creepy - all the bouncing, babbling, and accidental magic.

"Okay.  Call if you need me.  Especially to babysit."  She handed over a slip of paper to Dean.  "That's my cell.  I'm around somewhere."  She beamed then jogged over to talk to one of the other witches.

"At least she wasn't hitting on you," Sam teased.

"No, she's got a girlfriend," Dean agreed, putting it into his pocket.  "So," he said, waving Bobby over.  Bobby was a bit scared of Willow.  "She said they've been here and following this highway."

Bobby looked then pointed.  "That's a neutral area.  No towns there."

John nodded.  "We can start there.  Move our way up and down the highway.  Who is going to watch the babies?"

Dean grinned.  "Think we could get Missouri to do it for two days?"

"I don't think it'll be that fast taking them out," Sam said bluntly.  He looked at his father.  "They're our kids, you watch them and we'll destroy the demons."  He walked off, getting the boys into the car.

Dean snickered.  "He has a point."  He folded up the map.  "You can step in when one of us is injured, Dad."  He grinned at Bobby.  "Want to convoy back?"

"Part of the way at least."  He smirked at him.  "There's another family of hunters near there."

"We'll call," Dean promised.  That got a nod and they headed to their respective vehicles, waving at the witches that had helped them.  He was even nice enough to set the CD adaptor in and turn on the CD player once he had it plugged into the cigarette lighter.  Xander squealed at what came on and Tim beamed happily too.

"Hey, club music," Sam said happily.

"One hour, boys, then we're switching to stuff I want.  The driver picks the music."  He pulled out, letting them have it while Sam flipped through the new tapes and CD's.  "She brought weapons too."

"Love her for it," Sam agreed.  "What were their rides like?"

"Sedan for Xander, she said Tim used to drive a Ducatti, which was a racing bike?"

Sam looked at him.  "Official racing bikes, not street racing."  Dean whistled.  "Which means he likes it when you go fast for a reason."  Dean grinned, speeding up once they got outside the town.  Sam changed the CD to a later Metallica so Dean wouldn't complain.  Xander yawned and fell asleep to it.  Tim didn't grumble as often as usual but he fell asleep to it too.  He glanced back.  "Looks like it works."

"Good!  We'll sort them out by which ones put them to sleep."  Sam nodded at that.  It was good to have music the boys didn't scream at.  Sam held up the disco CD.  "That's the porno music one."

"Ah.  Okay then."  He put that inside the back cover.  "We'll have to see if the player can do copied CD's too.  If so I know some people I can get traveling music from."

"As long as I agree."

"You don't mind some of the nineties stuff, Dean."

"As long as I agree," he repeated firmly.

"Sure.  As long as you agree."  He hid his smile as he went back to searching the music stash.  Someone had some varied tastes.  "This is wailing, old country not modern country music."

"Probably his upset music," Dean said quietly.  "The comedy?"

"Not all clean.  Some clean, some not.  Andrew Dice Clay too."  He waved that tape.  Dean smirked at that.  "We'll see what happens."  He put the tapes into the box of Dean's music.  The CD carrier went into the glovebox. It was nice and restful.  They had already packed their stuff from their rooms so they hit the interstate and it was good to be on the road with *happy* babies for a change.  They had no idea how their father had done it with only him being around.

***

Dean found the lair, sneaking back to the cars, nodding behind him.  "There's at least thirty down there.  They all look busy and it doesn't look like anyone's in charge."

"Which isn't right for their species," Sam pointed out.  "They're a hive culture, Dean."

"I know.  So is this an outpost?"

"We can watch and see," Sam suggested.

John considered it.  "If we take them out would the others know and come?"  Sam nodded.  "Then we should get them as the higher ups come in.  If they don't do it tonight or tomorrow we'll take out this hive tomorrow night and then go after the others when they come running."  That got another nod.  He looked at the boys staring at them from the backseat.  "They really need a sitter."

"That one guy Dave is about six hours away," Dean offered.  "He seemed like he had a clue and could do a protection.  Not that I trust him with our kids but he checked out okay."

Sam shook his head.  "Dad can watch them while we take out the hive."  He went to set up a surveillance point.

Dean looked at his father.  "He's a bit upset," he explained.

"I noticed that," he said dryly, giving him a look.  Dean grinned and walked off.  "Fine, I'll watch the grandkids.  This time," he called after him.  He shook his head, getting into the Impala to check on them.  "Everyone good?  Need diapers or anything?"  Both boys spit then giggled.  "I guess that's a no.  At least the worms are gone."  He found the CD player and went to get his external speakers from his truck.  His radio had went out so a simple pair of cheap computer speakers attached to a tape player worked well enough until he could replace it.  He came back to turn it on, blinking at what was playing.  "I'm going to beat them senseless if they're letting you listen to that crap."  He found the CD's once he had that one stopped, putting in something decent.  The one marked 'disco' was worse!  He put it back with a growl and found one he *knew* was clean.  "Bobby doesn't like it but oh well."  He let them listen to that comedy album, watching the boys stare at each other then giggle.  "Behave, boys.  At least until you're of the right age to be naughty."  He got out when Sam came back.  "You let them listen to that filth!"

"That was Xander's old music collection, Dad.  But no, we were listening to the one in the player when they were asleep and Dean got tired but wouldn't let me drive."

"The one marked Disco...."

"Xander's former music, Dad.  He had two friends who were girls.  It probably kept them out of it."  He got into the bag in front of his seat, handing him something.  "Juice boxes.  They like them and it'll help them go to sleep faster."  He got into the trunk to get what they needed out and headed back once it was closed.

John glared at his back.  "I can still whip you, Sammy."

Sam grinned at him. "Dean picked that one last night."  He handed him the night vision binoculars.  "Dad's huffing in anger at your comedy choice last night."

"Oops.  They were asleep though."  He glanced at his brother.  "How are we going to be doing this with them?"

"How did Dad?"

"Other hunters as babysitters and sometimes we spent some time with Bobby or Pastor Jim."

"The daily things?"

"Sometimes a local woman."

"Oh."  He shrugged.  "We'll figure it out.  Pretty soon they'll be older anyway."

Dean looked at him again.  "I'm going to miss them being so cuddly.  You quit cuddling when you were three."

"Dad told me I had to quit cuddling you.  Said you weren't a teddy bear and you were getting annoyed."

"I was seven."  He shrugged.  "I was annoyed at most things that year.  The same as I was at thirteen."  He went back to watching.  "You sure you want to do the aging spell?"

"Do you want to go through potty training in the car?" Sam asked.

Dean shuddered at the thought of 'accidents' in his beloved car.  "No."  The phrase 'oops' already sent shudders or horrors through him whenever Tim said it.

"Then we'll figure it out."

"Sure."  He went back to watching, suddenly picking up his machete.  "We have visitors."  Sam took the binoculars to look through, picking up his own weapons.  They headed down there, getting them back for giving them kids and hurting their mother, as well as the loss of sanity they both had.  Dean got the queen while Sam watched his back and took on the workers trying to defend her.  As soon as he killed her the hive shuddered.  They killed a few last ones and got out of there, killing the ones that got out with them.  The hive collapsed.  They settled in to kill any that might dig their way out.  They'd ignore the slime and nastiness for now.

"Let me," John said.  "Go clean up and watch your heathens.  They're giggling and talking to their guardian angel again."  He took Dean's machete and made Sam move.  "Go.  Now."  They huffed but went to do that.  He sat down to watch and get his own revenge.  He didn't want to be a grandfather yet!  Neither of his boys were ready yet.  Dean still flirted with women.  There wasn't a mother to take care of the boys unless he counted Sam.  Dean had done a lot before and he knew what he was doing but Sam was doing pretty good as their mother really.   He did think it was cute how the boys called their uncle 'mommy' now and then too.  He got up to kill the first ones coming up through the dirt.  They were tired and it was easy but he never looked a gift hunt in the mouth.

***

Willow bopped up to where the boys and their kids were, beaming at them.  "I know how to do it."  She gave them hugs.  "We can do it all very easily and you'll age too or we can freeze you guys, which is harder, and let them age but to do that I have to take you off this plane."  She beamed at the witch behind the boys, ignoring her funny look.  "Hi!  I'm Willow."

"I can see that," she agreed.

Willow laughed and hugged her. "I got my Tara snuggly back!"  She looked around then at them.  "You'll probably want the car."  Dean gave her an eyebrow lifted look.  "You'll want the car."  He shook his head.  She nodded.  "Yes you will.  Trust me.  Especially if you two don't want to age five years at the same time."

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Because I'll have to take you off this plane to do it.  Didn't listen the first time?  Xander must get that from you."  She beamed and clapped her hands.  The spell she had started anchored in and they traveled together.  She loved preplanning and bringing it with her.  The demon that had taught it to her was so neat, even if it was dead now.  They appeared on a fairly dark, dusty place.  She looked around then giggled.  "Okay, get into the car!"  They ran for the car, they could feel the ground shaking like something huge was coming for them.  She waved.  "We'll see you in a few minutes!"  She disappeared.

Dean gunned the engine.  "Find a cave, Sammy."

"Ahead, slightly to the right."  He buckled up and they headed together.  "Think she gave us enough gas?"

"Probably not."

***

John was watching outside when the boys reappeared, bringing Dean some coffee since he looked like hell.  "Hi."

"Tell me it hasn't been five years and two months here?" Sam begged.

"No.  Fifteen minutes."  He handed him some water and got the kids out of the back of the very dusty car.  "Inside, boys.  Your daddies need to clean the car in a few minutes."

Dean let out a small, hysterical sounding laugh.  "I'm going to kill her."

"Stand in line," Sam ordered, glaring at him.

"What?  The demons hit on you?" John teased.

Sam glared at him.  "Yes and they wanted to give you more grandkids too, Dad.  They nearly managed it.  Be thankful you don't have three more grandkids from some lizard demons."  He walked off, going to shower.

Dean carefully parked his baby and went to take his own shower.  "Please have edible food?" he called.

"Making some, Daddy," Tim called.

"Thank you, son.  I love your cooking fingers."  He went to get Sam out of the shower so he could take his.  He didn't care if the water was cold.  Wouldn't be the first time.  He sighed in pleasure once he was under the water, standing there to enjoy it until it was ice cold and he was blue.  Then he scrubbed.   He came out to find his bag on the sink and put it aside, going to hunt down other stuff.  Sam handed him a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.  "Thanks.  She mind?"

"Yup."  He shrugged.  "Yay.  Washer's in the basement."  They nodded and went to do a long load of wash.  The kids' stuff too.  Then they came back to eat.  Missouri gave them pitying looks.  "Don't start," Sam ordered.   "Just don't.  Please?"

"Not a problem, boys.  You both look like hell.  Though the babies are gorgeous."

Alex gave her a look then slowly backed away.  "Are you a demon too?  Only they think we're cute."

"No, son, she's a psychic, she's not a demon.  It's a different type of creepy," Dean said, taking the food Timmy was working on.  He kissed him on the head.  "Thanks, son."

"Welcome."  He gave the rest to Sam.  Then he went back to making his cousin the pb&j he had been begging and whining for.  Alex sat down between the two daddies to eat while he sat beside Sam.  Sam grinned at him.  "What?  I'll get the spot in the middle next time."  He ate another bite, staring at their grandfather.  "She was right, we needed the car."  Dean bopped him on the shoulder behind Sam's back.  "Sorry, Dad."

He scraped his plate and got up to find more.  Missouri handed him the plates from the microwave, getting a grin.  "You *are* psychic!"  He sat down to share it when Sam stole some.  "Quit!  We weren't on that caveman planet for *that* long!"

"Tough, share!"

John gave them a look.  "How many places did you visit?"  Both of his sons glared at him and both grandsons sighed and shook their heads.  "Never mind.  Do we need medical treatment?"  They all shook their heads.  "We sure?"

"Could use another bath when the water's warmer again," Sam told him.  He went to restart the washer so their clothes would get clean.  He came back up the stairs.  "Missouri, we brought you back something."

"It's not the eating her thing, right?" Alex asked, taking another bite.

"No, nephew," Dean said dryly.  "Not the eating her thing.  I could've sworn I told you to leave that there."

"The clan of feral imps took it back for the fairy people."  He grinned at his uncle, looking just like him.  "They said it wasn't really sacred, just scary."

"It was," Sam agreed, patting him on the head.  "What did you bring back for presents?"

"Um...." Tim started.  "We can go check."  They went to check the car, letting their grandfather help.  That's why he got the blue stone that turned into the giant slug demon with a hard-on for humans.  When it turned in his hand and the slug demon pounced him, both fathers came out to yell at them and put it back into the stone.  That Missouri locked up for them and the real presents were found once John had a cold shower.  The hot water needed a bit more time.  Both boys ended up in the corner but oh well.

"It was only a slug demon, not harmful," Alex whined.  "It didn't do more than hump him."

"Shut up!" Sam called.  "Or else I'm adding a half-hour!"

"Yes, Mom," they called.

"And that gets you another ten on top of that half-hour," Dean called.  Both boys pouted.  "Sorry, Dad.  Meant that one for Bobby."  He took the boys' sandwiches and split them with Sam.  "We had to trade and hunt for food before anyone asks."  They finished up most of the food in the house and went to take more showers, this time making sure the boys got theirs too.   Then they collapsed in front of the tv for the night.

"You know, that fairy tv station wasn't so bad," Alex said, looking at Dean, who snorted.  "It wasn't.  Even if it did have a rip-off of CSI with the Seelie and Unseelie courts."

Dean looked at him.  "Shut up, Alex."

"Sorry, Dad."  He snuggled into his side.  "I thought it was cute the one actor guy was in both.  Can movies pick up succuba and elves?  Is that maybe what's wrong with actors who get drooled on but they can't act worth a damn?"

Sam patted him on the head.  "I know you get your warped brain from me, son, but quit, please?" Sam asked.

"Fine."

Tim looked at Alex.  "My people still looked nicer."

"It's no fair they crowned you king."

"They made you queen," he teased.  "I managed to get the sword out with science stuff."

"Weren't they supposed to forget that?" John asked.  Both boys snickered and got swatted for it.  "Uh-huh.  Anything else in the presents I should worry about?"

"Hers is a healing amulet, not sure if it works here," Sam said.  He yawned.  "Yours was a new sheathe for a dagger.  The dagger got eaten by something in the same place Alex got crowned queen and Dean too."  Dean growled at him.  "You did."

"Yay me.  They only took the boys because they wanted us.  That way we could breed for them.  No way am I having kids for any set of fairies."

"We could use a sister," Tim offered with a bright, happy grin.

Alex looked at him.  "Don't say that.  They nearly turned your dad into a girl!  Twice!"

"He did make a sucky girl," Sam agreed.  Dean punched him on the arm.  "Hey!"

"Shut up, bitch."

"Oh, bite me, your highness, queen jerk."

"Boys!" Missouri snapped before they could have a go at each other.  "Go sleep!"  They pouted but went to sleep.  She went to check the rest of the presents.  Hers was very pretty and useful.  John's was nice and would fit his k-bar knife.  There was a whole box of stuff marked 'for Bobby's amusement' so she put the slug demon's stone into it.  The weapons were well used.  They were nearly out of ammo.  They were out of stakes and crossbow bolts.  There were a few new weapons in there and a small bag with Alex's name on the handle.  John looked and groaned but left it there.  His grandson would get his own guns when he was older he was sure.  They locked the car back up and went back inside, taking the rest of the supplies.  Missouri looked at them then tossed them out without another word.  The boys were snoring somewhere, she could hear them through the vents.  She snuck up to check on them, smiling at the sight of the boys sleeping in-between their fathers on the bed.  She even managed to sneak a picture before Alex threw something hard at her head.  John snuck in to take everything but Dean's knife from him.  Alex didn't need weapons yet. They went to relax and watch the car to make sure it wasn't going to warp.

"No, no more horses!" Tim shouted, starting to cry.  He stopped a few seconds later by loving support for his nightmares.  It'd be okay.  Someday the two boys would take on the family business for them.  Then John could help their fathers finish hunting down that one demon.  Or maybe they'd get it before then.  If Dean or Sam ever decided to date again.  Then maybe he'd get a normal grandchild, one who wasn't making him float off the couch.  He flailed and was dropped back onto it.  "Which one was that?" he asked calmly.

"Tim.  He's strong like his mother is."

He groaned.  Maybe some day he'd miss being bored.  He hoped.  A granddaughter might be nice even if he didn't know what to do with a girl.

The End.